Generated by All in One SEO Pro v5.0.1.1, this is an llms-full.txt file, used by LLMs to index the site. # Avery Heights Senior Living in Hartford, CT ## Posts ### [The Hidden Cost of "Buy-In" Communities: Why Renting at Avery Heights Makes Sense](https://averyheights.org/the-hidden-senior-living-entrance-fees-explained-why-renting-at-avery-heights-makes-sense/) **Published:** February 2, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When you begin researching senior living options in Connecticut, you will quickly encounter two very different financial models: the **“Buy-In” (Entrance Fee)** model and the **Rental** model. For many, the idea of a “buy-in” sounds like a solid investment—a way to secure future care. However, once **senior living entrance fees are explained** in detail, many savvy retirees realize that the upfront cost often carries hidden burdens that can impact their long-term financial liquidity. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), we’ve chosen a different path. As a rental-only community, we prioritize your financial freedom without compromising on the quality of care. Here is everything you need to know about the hidden costs of buy-in fees and why renting is often the smarter financial move. ### What is a Senior Living Entrance Fee? An entrance fee (or “buy-in”) is a large upfront payment required by many Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRCs), also known as Life Plan Communities. These fees can range from **$100,000 to over $1,000,000**, depending on the size of the residence and the level of future care promised. While these communities often market these fees as a “pre-payment” for healthcare, the reality is more complex. ### The Hidden Costs of the “Buy-In” Model #### 1. The Loss of Liquid Assets The most significant “hidden cost” is the loss of liquidity. When you hand over a six-figure sum to a community, that money is no longer working for you. In a rental model, that same capital could remain in your investment portfolio, generating interest, dividends, or capital gains that you control. #### 2. The “Refund” Illusion Many buy-in communities offer “90% refundable” contracts. While this sounds like a safety net for your estate, it often comes with a catch. Frequently, the refund is only issued *after* your unit has been re-occupied by a new resident. Furthermore, that refund does not account for inflation; $200,000 returned ten years from now will have significantly less purchasing power than it does today. #### 3. Complexity and “Sunk Cost” Once you have paid a massive entrance fee, you may feel “locked in.” If your family situation changes or you decide you’d prefer a different location, the process of exiting a buy-in contract can be legally and financially draining. ### The Avery Heights Advantage: The Power of the Rental Model At Avery Heights, we believe your hard-earned assets should belong to you. We offer a full continuum of care—including [Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/), [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-avery-heights-hartford-ct/), and [Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/)—all without an entrance fee. #### Why Renting Makes Sense: - **Financial Flexibility:** By choosing our [independent apartments](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/apartments/) or [cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/), you keep your capital. You can use your savings to travel, support your grandchildren’s education, or simply enjoy the peace of mind that comes with having liquid funds. - **Priority Access to Care:** Some people fear that without a buy-in, they won’t have a spot in higher levels of care. At Avery Heights, our residents receive **priority access** to our full continuum, including [Skilled Nursing and Rehab](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/), should their needs ever change. - **Simplified Monthly Living:** Instead of complex contracts, you sign a straightforward lease. Your monthly fee covers maintenance, dining, security, and our signature “Zest” wellness programming. ### Comparison: Rental vs. Buy-In FeatureBuy-In (Life Plan/CCRC)Avery Heights (Rental Model)**Upfront Cost**$100k – $1M+\*\*$0 Entrance Fee\*\***Asset Control**Managed by the community**Managed by YOU****Exit Strategy**Often tied to unit resale**Simple lease terms****Healthcare Access**Included or discounted**Priority access to full continuum****Mission**Can be for-profit or non-profit**Not-for-profit mission** ### Is Renting Right for You? Choosing a senior living community is as much a financial decision as it is a lifestyle one. If you value independence, dignity, and the ability to control your own wealth, the rental model at Avery Heights is designed for you. Our [not-for-profit mission](https://averyheights.org/about-us/our-history/) ensures that our focus remains on the well-being of our residents, not the bottom line of a corporate entity. **Ready to see the difference for yourself?** Don’t let a “buy-in” fee limit your future. Experience the vibrant, flexible lifestyle waiting for you in Hartford. 👉 **[Contact us today to schedule a tour and receive a personalized cost comparison.](https://averyheights.org/)** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Leading Memory Care Facility Near Me in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/leading-memory-care-facility-near-me-in-hartford-ct/) **Published:** June 9, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Finding the right [memory care facility](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) for your loved one is a significant decision. Memory care facility near me provide specialized environments and services to enhance the quality of life for individuals living with dementia or Alzheimer’s. Among the options available, Avery Heights stands out as a reliable and compassionate provider of memory care in Hartford, CT. ![memory care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/memory-care.webp "memory-care - Avery Heights") This blog will guide you through the essentials of [memory care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "Memory Care"), explore the unique features of Avery Heights, and explain why it is one of the most trusted memory care facilities near you. Whether you are searching for “memory care near me” or simply trying to understand what makes a quality memory care center, we’ve got you covered. ## What is Memory Care and Who is It For? Memory care is a specialized form of senior living designed to meet the unique needs of individuals living with Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other related conditions. Unlike general [assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/ "Assisted Living"), [memory care facilities](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "Memory Care") focus on providing an environment that supports cognitive well-being and ensures safety. Conditions that may require memory care include: - [Alzheimer’s disease ](https://averyheights.org/expert-memory-care-services-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/ "Expert Memory Care Services in Hartford, CT | Avery Heights") - [Vascular dementia ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/health-and-wellness/ "Health and Wellness") - [Lewy body dementia](https://averyheights.org/find-quality-memory-care-in-connecticut-for-your-loved-one/ "Find Quality Memory Care in Connecticut for a Loved One") These facilities provide not only medical and personal care but also therapeutic programs that stimulate memory and engagement. Memory care centers, like Avery Heights, go the extra mile to foster independence while ensuring residents’ safety and comfort. ## What Sets Avery Heights Apart? At Avery Heights in Hartford, CT, memory care is more than a service; it is a commitment to treating every resident like family. Here’s what sets us apart: ### Personalized Care Plans Every resident is unique, and so are their needs. Avery Heights specializes in creating customized care plans tailored to the individual’s medical requirements, preferences, and cognitive abilities. Through these tailored approaches, residents experience compassionate care that feels personal and thoughtful. ### Specialized Staff Training Our caregivers receive advanced training in dementia care techniques. They are not only skilled but also empathetic, fostering strong relationships with residents and their families. This ensures that our team is not just attentive but truly understands the challenges of dementia care. ### Safe and Secure Environment The safety of residents is a top priority at Avery Heights. We have designed secure living spaces that minimize risks, prevent wandering, and maximize comfort. From state-of-the-art monitoring systems to carefully curated layouts, every aspect of our facility ensures peace of mind for both residents and their families. ## Comprehensive Services at Avery Heights Avery Heights is committed to providing a wide range of services to support its residents comprehensively: - **Medication Management** Properly managing medications is critical for those with memory challenges. Our staff ensures accurate and timely administration of all prescriptions and treatments. - **Daily Living Assistance** From bathing and dressing to meal preparation, our team provides compassionate assistance with daily activities, ensuring residents maintain their dignity and independence. - **Therapeutic Activities** Residents enjoy a variety of cognitive and physical activities designed to maintain or improve their abilities. These activities not only enhance memory but also bring joy and foster connections among residents. By offering these services, Avery Heights ensures a holistic approach to care, meeting all aspects of a resident’s needs. ## A Supportive Community and Engaging Environment Avery Heights is not just a memory care facility; it is a thriving community. We believe in creating an atmosphere where residents feel at home. The environment at Avery Heights is warm, welcoming, and filled with opportunities for social engagement. From group events and outings to one-on-one activities, we cultivate an environment that reduces stress and builds meaningful connections. For many families, knowing their loved one is part of such a supportive environment provides invaluable peace of mind. ## Convenient Location in Hartford, CT Convenience and accessibility are key considerations when selecting a memory care facility for your loved one. Avery Heights is centrally located in Hartford, Connecticut, making it easily accessible for families throughout the region. Families can visit regularly without hassle, strengthening their bond with loved ones and staying actively involved in their care. Our team promotes open communication and collaboration with families, ensuring that everyone is involved in the caregiving process. ## Discover Compassionate Memory Care Facility Near Me When searching for “**memory care facilities near me**,” choosing Avery Heights means choosing a partner who understands your loved one’s unique needs. With our personalized care plans, secure environment, engaging community, and prime location in [Hartford, CT](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home), we are here to provide the support families are looking for. [Contact Us Today!](https://averyheights.org/contact/) [Schedule a Visit](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min) **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Top Memory Care Facilities in Hartford, CT: Why Avery Heights Leads](https://averyheights.org/top-memory-care-facilities-in-hartford-ct-why-avery-heights-leads/) **Published:** August 19, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Finding memory care facilities for a loved one with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia represents one of life’s most challenging decisions. Families across Hartford, CT face this difficult choice while balancing quality of care, compassionate support, and specialized services that address the unique needs of memory-related conditions. Memory care facilities in Hartford, CT have evolved significantly over recent years, offering more personalized approaches to dementia care and creating environments specifically designed for cognitive wellness. Among these options, Avery Heights has established itself as a premier choice for families seeking comprehensive memory care near me, combining specialized expertise with a warm, community-focused atmosphere. This guide explores what makes exceptional memory care and why Avery Heights stands out among dementia care communities in the Hartford area, helping you make an informed decision for your family’s future. ![memory care in harford ct, Memory Care Facilities](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/anne-nygard-0ragDalrPpk-unsplash-scaled-1-2048x1366.jpg "anne-nygard-0ragDalrPpk-unsplash - Avery Heights") ## Understanding Memory Care: More Than Standard Senior Living Memory care represents a specialized form of long-term care designed specifically for individuals living with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, and other cognitive impairments. Unlike traditional assisted living, memory care facilities provide secure environments with staff trained in dementia-specific care techniques. These dementia support facilities focus on maintaining dignity and quality of life while addressing the progressive nature of memory-related conditions. Residents benefit from structured routines, cognitive stimulation programs, and carefully designed physical spaces that reduce confusion and promote independence within safe boundaries. Memory care serves individuals at various stages of cognitive decline, from early-stage dementia where residents may need minimal assistance to advanced stages requiring comprehensive daily support. The goal remains consistent: preserving each person’s sense of self while providing the specialized care they need. ## Essential Features of Quality Memory Care Facilities ### Specialized Staff Training and Expertise Outstanding memory care facilities near me employ staff members with extensive training in dementia care approaches. These professionals understand how cognitive changes affect behavior, communication, and daily functioning. They’re equipped to handle challenging situations with patience and specialized techniques that reduce anxiety and confusion. Staff-to-resident ratios in quality memory care typically exceed those found in standard assisted living, ensuring personalized attention and immediate response to individual needs. ### Secure, Thoughtfully Designed Environments Effective dementia care communities feature secure perimeters that allow residents to move freely within safe boundaries. Interior design elements include clear sight lines, familiar décor, and way-finding systems that help residents navigate their environment confidently. These facilities often incorporate outdoor spaces designed for safe wandering, therapeutic gardens, and activity areas that stimulate positive memories and encourage social interaction. ### Comprehensive Care Planning Quality memory care involves individualized care plans that address each resident’s unique history, preferences, and current abilities. These plans evolve as conditions change, ensuring care remains appropriate and effective throughout the journey. Regular assessments by healthcare professionals, including physicians specializing in geriatric medicine and dementia care, help maintain optimal health outcomes. ### Engaging Activity Programs Therapeutic activities play a crucial role in memory care, helping residents maintain cognitive function and emotional well-being. Programs might include music therapy, art activities, reminiscence therapy, and gentle exercise designed for varying ability levels. ## Avery Heights: Setting the Standard for Memory Care Hartford CT Avery Heights has earned recognition as a leading memory care facility in Hartford, CT through its commitment to person-centered care and innovative approaches to dementia support. The facility combines evidence-based care practices with a genuine understanding of each family’s unique situation. ### Personalized Memory Care Approach At Avery Heights, memory care begins with comprehensive assessments that explore each resident’s personal history, interests, and care needs. This information shapes individualized care plans that honor personal preferences while addressing medical and safety requirements. The facility’s approach recognizes that effective dementia care extends beyond managing symptoms to celebrating each person’s remaining abilities and fostering meaningful connections with family, staff, and fellow residents. ### Specialized Alzheimer’s Care CT Programs Avery Heights offers targeted programs for different types and stages of dementia, recognizing that Alzheimer’s care CT requires specific expertise. Their staff receives ongoing education about the latest developments in dementia research and care techniques. Programs include cognitive stimulation activities, behavioral management strategies, and family education sessions that help loved ones understand and adapt to changing needs. ### Family-Centered Support Understanding that dementia affects entire families, Avery Heights provides extensive support for family members navigating this journey. Regular communication, care plan meetings, and educational resources help families stay connected and informed. The facility offers flexible visiting policies and family event programming that maintains important relationships while respecting residents’ needs for routine and stability. ### Community Integration and Partnerships Avery Heights collaborates with Hartford-area healthcare providers, creating seamless care coordination for residents requiring specialized medical attention. These partnerships ensure access to geriatric psychiatrists, neurologists, and other specialists familiar with dementia-related health issues. The facility also maintains connections with local community organizations, bringing programming and volunteers that enrich residents’ daily experiences. ## Making the Right Choice for Your Family Selecting among memory care facilities requires careful consideration of multiple factors beyond basic care quality. Location matters—choosing memory care near me allows for more frequent family visits and maintains connections to familiar communities. Consider the facility’s approach to different stages of dementia progression. Some residents may benefit from environments that encourage independence, while others need more structured support. The best dementia care communities can accommodate changing needs without requiring disruptive transitions. Financial considerations also play important roles in decision-making. Understanding what services are included in basic fees versus additional charges helps families plan appropriately for long-term care costs. ## Your Next Steps Toward Quality Memory Care Choosing the right memory care facility represents a significant decision that affects your loved one’s quality of life and your family’s peace of mind. Avery Heights offers the specialized expertise, compassionate care, and community support that make it a standout choice among memory care facilities in Hartford, CT. We encourage families to visit Avery Heights, meet the staff, and experience firsthand the welcoming environment that has made it a trusted name in Alzheimer’s care CT. Contact us today to schedule a tour and learn more about how our memory care programs can support your family’s journey. Remember that seeking memory care represents an act of love, not surrender. Quality facilities like Avery Heights provide opportunities for continued growth, meaningful relationships, and dignity throughout the memory care journey. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Choosing An Assisted Living Facility - A Guide](https://averyheights.org/choosing-an-assisted-living-facility/) **Published:** March 21, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Choosing an assisted living facility, Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/matteo-vistocco-u_CvU45FLH8-unsplash-scaled-1.jpg "matteo-vistocco-u_CvU45FLH8-unsplash - Avery Heights")https://averyheights.org/senior-programs-and-activities-hartford-ct/ Choosing an assisted living facility for a loved one can be an overwhelming and difficult task. It’s essential to take the time to research the available facilities and make sure that the one you select is the best fit for your loved one. **Consider Your Loved One’s Specific Needs** When considering an assisted living facility for a loved one, it is important to consider their specific needs. Different facilities provide different levels of care, so it is important to take into account the individual’s medical and personal needs. For example, if the loved one has a chronic illness or mobility issues, then the facility should be able to provide assistance with basic activities of daily living such as dressing, bathing, and toileting. Additionally, it is important to consider the emotional and social needs of the individual, as living in an assisted living facility can be an isolating and lonely experience. Therefore, the facility should provide support, [engaging activities,](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) and opportunities to socialize and make friends. Finally, it is important to consider the cost of the facility and whether it is covered by insurance or other financial assistance. Taking into account all of these needs will ensure that the loved one is in a safe and comfortable environment that meets their individual needs. **Take a Tour of the Facility** When choosing an assisted living facility for a loved one, it is important to take a tour of the facility to get a good feel for the environment and the staff. During the tour, it is [important to ask questions](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/) and get a clear picture of the facility’s services and amenities. Ask questions such as what kind of healthcare is provided, what activities are available, what safety features are in place, and what kind of staff is on-site. Additionally, make sure to observe the environment, the cleanliness of the facility, the staff-to-resident ratio, and the interactions between staff and residents. It is also important to ask about any additional fees or costs that may be associated with the facility. This could include costs for meals, medications, additional services, or other fees. During the tour, try to get a good feel for the atmosphere of the facility and the overall care provided. Lastly, be sure to ask the staff any other questions you have, and take the time to get to know the staff and residents. Taking a tour of the facility is an important step in finding the right assisted living facility for a loved one. **Read Reviews** Reading reviews can be an invaluable resource when selecting an assisted living facility for a loved one. Reviews are typically written by current or former residents, and they can provide an inside look at the facility and the quality of care they offer. This can be especially helpful for those who cannot visit the facility in person. Through reviews, families can get an understanding of the atmosphere, staff, and overall experience of the residents. Additionally, reviews will often list the amenities that are available, such as activities and events, as well as any potential drawbacks. Online reviews are not the only source of information, however. Families should also take the time to speak with current residents of the facility to get a better understanding of their experience. Doing thorough research can help families make informed decisions and ensure that their loved one is receiving the best care possible. **Final Thoughts** Choosing the best-assisted living facility for a loved one can be a daunting task. It is important to research the facility, visit the facility in person, and speak with staff and current residents. Additionally, it is important to keep in mind the specific needs and wants of your loved one, as well as the budget, to ensure the best fit. By taking the time to do your research, you can make sure that your loved one is placed in a safe, comfortable, and supportive environment that meets their needs and provides them with the best possible care. Provide your loved one with the best care possible with the help of Avery Heights. We are a rental-only community that provides [assisted living in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/our-community/). We offer a full continuum of care—including Assisted Living Memory Care—as well as distinctive offerings like 24-hour security, therapy seven days per week, and dental services. Get in touch with us today! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [5 Factors to Consider When Choosing an Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/5-factors-to-consider-when-choosing-an-assisted-living-facility/) **Published:** February 10, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Senior Assisted Living Community Social, Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/40956-300x212.jpg "Senior people watching televison together - Avery Heights") When considering an assisted living facility for an elderly family member or friend, choosing the right assisted living facility can be a daunting task. Assisted living facilities provide seniors with housing, healthcare services, and social activities in a secure, comfortable environment. To make sure you select the right facility for your loved one, consider these five factors. **Location** Location is an important factor when selecting an assisted living facility. Choose a facility that is close to family and friends, or in a desirable area that your loved one is familiar with. Also consider the availability of healthcare services, public transportation, and other amenities in the area. **Cost** The cost of assisted living can vary greatly depending on the type of facility and services provided. Be sure to compare the costs of different facilities to ensure you are getting the best value. Additionally, look into any financial aid or grants that may be available. When considering the cost of assisted living, it’s important to consider the type of facility and the services provided. For example, some assisted living facilities offer private rooms while others offer shared rooms. The cost will also vary depending on the level of care required. Some facilities provide basic services such as meals and laundry, while others offer more [comprehensive care](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-quality-senior-care/), such as help with bathing, dressing, and medication management. Be sure to compare the costs of different assisted living facilities before making a decision. It’s also important to consider any financial aid or grants that may be available. These can help offset the cost of assisted living, making it more affordable. **Services** Assisted living facilities provide a variety of services, such as meals, transportation, physical therapy, and medication monitoring. Make sure the [facility you choose](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-best-assisted-living-facility/) offers the services your loved one needs. **Staff** The staff at an assisted living facility can make a big difference. Look for staff that are friendly and knowledgeable, and who are committed to providing quality care. When you visit an assisted living facility, take the time to talk to the staff. Get to know them and ask questions about their experience and training. Find out how they handle residents with different needs. You should also ask about the facility’s policies and procedures. Make sure you understand how the facility will care for your loved one and what you can expect. **Reputation** When searching for a senior living community, it’s important to do your research to find a reputable facility with a good track record. Reading reviews from other seniors and their families is a great way to get an idea of what a particular community is like. There are a few things to look for when reading reviews. First, see if the reviewers have generally positive things to say about the community. Second, look for specific details about what they liked or didn’t like. This can give you a better idea of what to expect if you were to move into the community. Finally, don’t hesitate to contact the community directly and ask any questions you may have. The staff should be able to [answer any of your questions](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/) and help you make a decision about whether or not the community is right for you. **Conclusion** Choosing an assisted living facility is an important decision. By considering these five factors, you can ensure that your loved one is in the best possible environment. Are you considering moving a family member into an assisted living facility? If so, Avery Heights is the perfect place for your loved one. At Avery Heights, we have comfortable and safe[ assisted living cottages](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) with 24-hour security. Our experienced staff is dedicated to providing extra assistance to residents who need help with daily tasks. Contact us today to learn more! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Dementia Care Communities in Hartford, CT: What Families Need to Know](https://averyheights.org/dementia-care-communities-in-hartford-ct-what-families-need-to-know/) **Published:** October 23, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![dementia care communities, memory care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Window-2-255x300.webp "Window #2 - Avery Heights")When a loved one begins showing signs of dementia, families face difficult questions. How can we keep them safe? What kind of care do they really need? Will they be happy? Dementia affects more than 6 million Americans, and that number continues to rise. For families in Hartford, Connecticut, finding the right care environment becomes a priority—not just for medical support, but for dignity, comfort, and quality of life. Specialized [dementia care communities](https://averyheights.org/leading-dementia-care-communities-in-hartford-ct-for-specialized-support/) offer more than supervision. They provide structured environments designed around the unique needs of individuals living with cognitive decline. At Avery Heights, we understand that choosing dementia care is one of the hardest decisions a family can make. That’s why we’ve built our communities to honor the person behind the diagnosis, offering safety without sacrificing warmth or independence. This guide will walk you through what Dementia Care Communities really means, what to look for in a memory care community, and how Avery Heights supports both residents and their families through every stage of the journey. ## Understanding Dementia Care Communities and Memory Care [Dementia](https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/alzheimers-and-dementia/what-dementia-symptoms-types-and-diagnosis#:~:text=Dementia%20is%20the%20loss%20of,and%20their%20personalities%20may%20change.) is an umbrella term for a range of conditions that affect memory, thinking, and behavior. Alzheimer’s disease is the most common form, but vascular dementia, Lewy body dementia, and frontotemporal dementia also impact thousands of individuals and their families. The challenges go beyond memory loss. People with dementia may experience confusion, mood swings, difficulty communicating, and wandering behavior. These changes can make it unsafe for someone to live alone or in a traditional assisted living setting. Memory care addresses these specific challenges. Unlike general senior living, memory care communities in Hartford, CT, are designed with secure layouts, trained staff, and therapeutic programming tailored to cognitive needs. The goal is to support residents in a way that preserves their sense of self while keeping them safe. Key components of effective memory care include: - ****Specially trained staff**** who understand dementia-related behaviors and how to respond with compassion - ****Secure environments**** that prevent wandering while still feeling homelike - ****Therapeutic activities**** that engage residents cognitively, socially, and emotionally - ****Personalized care plans**** that adapt as needs change At Avery Heights, memory care isn’t just about managing symptoms. It’s about creating an environment where individuals with dementia can thrive. ## Key Features of Avery Heights Dementia Care Communities Avery Heights takes a holistic approach to [Alzheimer’s care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) in Hartford. Our communities are designed to feel like home, not a hospital. From the layout of our buildings to the training of our staff, every detail reflects our commitment to person-centered care. ### A Homelike, Secure Environment Our dementia care communities feature layouts that reduce confusion and promote independence. Hallways are wide and well-lit. Common areas are inviting and comfortable. Residents have access to secure outdoor spaces, including sensory gardens that stimulate the senses and encourage calm. Safety is built into the design without feeling institutional. Doors are monitored, but residents can still move freely within their living areas. The environment supports exploration while preventing unsafe wandering. ### Specialized Staff Training Our team members receive ongoing training in [dementia care best practices](https://averyheights.org/leading-dementia-care-communities-in-hartford-ct-for-specialized-support/). They learn how to communicate effectively with residents who have cognitive challenges, how to redirect behaviors without confrontation, and how to maintain dignity in every interaction. Staff at Avery Heights aren’t just caregivers—they’re companions. Many of our team members have been with us for years, building deep relationships with residents and their families. ### Dementia Care Communities: Personalized Care Plans No two people experience dementia the same way. That’s why we create individualized care plans for every resident. These plans take into account medical needs, personal preferences, daily routines, and family input. As dementia progresses, care needs change. Our team regularly reassesses and adjusts care plans to ensure residents receive the right level of support at every stage. ### Therapeutic Activities and Programs Engagement is a cornerstone of memory care at Avery Heights. Our activity programming includes: - ****Music therapy****: Familiar songs can unlock memories and emotions, even in advanced dementia - ****Art therapy****: Creative expression provides an outlet for feelings and fosters a sense of accomplishment - ****Reminiscence therapy****: Guided conversations about the past help residents connect with their personal history - ****Physical wellness activities****: Gentle exercise, yoga, and walking groups support overall health These activities aren’t just time-fillers. They’re evidence-based interventions that improve cognitive function, reduce agitation, and enhance quality of life. ## Benefits of Choosing Dementia Care Communities like Avery Heights Families who choose Avery Heights for dementia care in Hartford, CT, often describe a sense of relief. After months or years of worry, they find a place where their loved one is not only safe but genuinely cared for. ### Improved Quality of Life for Residents Residents at Avery Heights experience: - ****Enhanced cognitive function****: Structured routines and therapeutic activities slow cognitive decline - ****Reduced agitation****: A calm, predictable environment minimizes triggers for anxiety and confusion - ****Increased social engagement****: Group activities and shared meals foster connection and reduce isolation Many families notice positive changes within weeks of their loved one moving in. A parent who was withdrawn at home becomes more engaged. A spouse who wandered constantly feels settled. ### Peace of Mind for Families Caring for someone with dementia at home is exhausting. Families often feel guilty, overwhelmed, and isolated. Choosing a memory care community doesn’t mean giving up—it means getting support. At Avery Heights, families know their loved one is in a secure environment with 24/7 supervision. They can visit anytime, participate in care planning, and connect with other families facing similar challenges. ### A Supportive Community Dementia doesn’t just affect the individual—it impacts the entire family. Avery Heights offers support groups, educational workshops, and regular communication to keep families informed and involved. Being part of a community of caregivers and families who understand what you’re going through makes a difference. You’re not alone. ## Practical Considerations for Families Deciding to move a loved one into a dementia care community is never easy. Here’s what you need to know to make an informed decision. ### Assessing Your Loved One’s Needs Not everyone with dementia needs memory care right away. Some individuals do well at home with support. But when safety becomes a concern—wandering, forgetting to eat, medication errors—it may be time to consider specialized care. Signs that memory care might be appropriate include: - Frequent confusion about time, place, or people - Unsafe behaviors like leaving the stove on or wandering outside - Difficulty managing daily tasks like bathing or dressing - Caregiver burnout ### The Transition Process Moving into a dementia care community can feel overwhelming, but Avery Heights makes the process as smooth as possible. Here’s what to expect: 1. ****Assessment****: We meet with you and your loved one to understand their needs, preferences, and medical history 2. ****Planning****: Together, we create a personalized care plan and discuss the best time for the move 3. ****Move-in****: Our team helps with the transition, making sure your loved one feels welcomed and comfortable Families are encouraged to bring familiar items—photos, favorite blankets, cherished possessions—to help the new space feel like home. ## **Understanding the Cost** Memory care is priced around the level of support a resident needs, so what one family pays looks different from what another pays. Communities also draw the line differently between what’s covered by the base monthly rate and what gets billed separately as needs change, which makes a side-by-side comparison harder than it first appears. As you compare communities in the Hartford area, ask each one the same questions: what the monthly rate includes, how care levels are assessed and repriced, what triggers an increase, and which payment methods they accept. Payment arrangements vary considerably from one community to the next, so the only dependable answer is the one that community gives you directly. Our team can walk you through current pricing at Avery Heights and what applies to your family’s situation. Contact us to schedule a free consultation. ## Take the Next Step with Avery Heights Choosing the right dementia care community is one of the most important decisions you’ll make for your loved one. At Avery Heights, we’re committed to providing the highest standard of Alzheimer’s support in Hartford, CT. We invite you to schedule a tour of our memory care communities. See our secure, homelike environments. Meet our compassionate staff. Ask questions. Get a feel for what life at Avery Heights is really like. We also offer free consultations to discuss your loved one’s unique needs and explore whether memory care is the right fit. Our team is here to support you, whether you’re ready to move forward or still gathering information. [****Contact Avery Heights today****](https://averyheights.org/contact/) to learn more about our dementia care communities in Hartford, Connecticut. Visit our website or call us to speak with a member of our team. ## Finding Hope in Dementia Care Communities Dementia changes lives, but it doesn’t define them. With the right care, individuals living with Alzheimer’s and related conditions can experience joy, connection, and purpose. At Avery Heights, we see the person first—not the diagnosis. Our memory care communities are built on respect, compassion, and a deep understanding of what it means to live well with dementia. If you’re navigating this journey with a loved one, you don’t have to do it alone. We’re here to walk beside you, offering support, expertise, and a community that cares. Because everyone deserves to live with dignity, safety, and love—no matter where they are on their dementia journey. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Finding the Heart in Hartford's Nursing Homes](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living/) **Published:** October 15, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** West Hartford Assisted Living: Navigating the world of nursing homes can be an emotional and challenging experience, especially for family caregivers who want the best for their loved ones. Choosing the right facility can significantly impact the quality of life for elderly residents, offering them the comfort, care, and community they need. In Hartford, Connecticut, local nursing homes present a compelling option, blending convenience with high-quality care. This blog post explores the many benefits of selecting a Hartford-based nursing home, shedding light on why it’s a decision that can enhance the well-being of both residents and their families. ## The Advantages of Local Care Selecting a local Hartford nursing home offers numerous [advantages over more distant facilities](https://averyheights.org/8-advantages-of-relocating-to-an-assisted-living-facility/). One of the most significant benefits is convenience. Having a loved one in a nearby facility means family visits are easier to coordinate, ensuring that residents feel connected and supported by their family members. This proximity also allows for spontaneous visits, which can be comforting for residents and their families. Community ties are another critical advantage. Local nursing homes often have strong connections with the surrounding community, providing residents opportunities to engage in local events and activities. This sense of community involvement can significantly [enhance the quality of life](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-the-quality-of-life-for-seniors-with-memory-care-at-avery-heights/) for residents, offering them a sense of belonging and purpose. Furthermore, accessibility for family visits ensures that residents and their families can maintain strong relationships. Regular visits contribute to residents’ emotional well-being, helping to reduce feelings of loneliness or isolation. Families can also participate more actively in [care planning](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) and decision-making, providing peace of mind and reassurance about the quality of care their loved ones receive. ## Quality of Care in West Hartford Assisted Living Hartford’s nursing homes are renowned for offering high-quality care tailored to each resident’s unique needs. These facilities often provide [personalized care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) plans, ensuring every resident receives the required attention and support. From assistance with daily living activities to specialized medical care, Hartford nursing homes offer a range of services designed to promote health and well-being. Healthcare expertise is another hallmark of Hartford’s nursing homes. Many facilities employ skilled healthcare professionals who are experienced in working with elderly residents. This expertise [ensures that residents receive comprehensive care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/), encompassing routine health checks and specialized medical interventions. Additionally, Hartford nursing homes often offer specialized services, such as memory care for residents with Alzheimer’s or dementia. These programs are designed to maintain residents’ dignity and independence while providing the support they need in a safe and nurturing environment. ## Community Engagement A strong sense of community is vital for the well-being of nursing home residents. In Hartford, local communities play an [active role in supporting and engaging](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) with nursing home residents. This engagement takes many forms, from organized activities and outings to partnerships with local schools and organizations. Community involvement provides residents with a sense of connection to the outside world, reducing feelings of isolation. Participating in local events or enjoying community group visits can bring residents joy and excitement, enriching their daily lives. Furthermore, community engagement promotes a sense of belonging and well-being among residents. Knowing they are valued community members can boost residents’ self-esteem and happiness, contributing to a positive living experience. ## Financial and Practical Considerations Choosing a local nursing home in Hartford also offers practical advantages. Financial considerations play a significant role in the decision-making process for many families. Local nursing homes often offer competitive pricing and are more likely to accept various insurance plans, making them a financially viable option. Managing affairs is also more straightforward when dealing with a local facility. Families can easily communicate with staff, attend meetings, and address any concerns or questions that may arise. This accessibility simplifies the process of coordinating [care and ensures](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) that families remain informed and involved in their loved one’s care. Additionally, the ease of visiting a local nursing home cannot be overstated. Frequent visits allow families to closely monitor their loved one’s well-being, [ensuring they receive the best care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and support. ## Testimonials and Real Stories Real-life testimonials from families and residents highlight the benefits of choosing a local Hartford nursing home. One family member shared their experience, noting how the nursing home’s proximity allowed them to visit their loved one regularly, strengthening their relationship and providing comfort to both parties. Another resident expressed their appreciation for the personalized care they received, emphasizing how the staff took the time to understand their preferences and needs. This personalized approach made them feel valued and respected, enhancing their overall experience. These stories underscore the positive impact of local nursing homes, demonstrating how they can offer a supportive and fulfilling environment for residents while providing peace of mind for families. ## Conclusion Opting for a local nursing home in Hartford offers numerous advantages for both residents and their families. From the convenience of regular family visits to high-quality care and strong community ties, local facilities provide a supportive and enriching environment that promotes residents’ well-being and happiness. For families navigating the complex world of elder care, choosing a Hartford nursing home can provide peace of mind, knowing that their loved ones are in capable and caring hands. By prioritizing local care, families can ensure that their loved ones enjoy a fulfilling and meaningful life, surrounded by the comfort of community and the assurance of quality care. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Your Guide to Transitioning Smoothly to West Hartford Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-transitioning-smoothly/) **Published:** August 14, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Deciding to move into an assisted living community can be daunting for seniors and their caregivers. However, this transition can be a positive and enriching experience for everyone involved with the right approach and guidance. Whether you are a senior looking for a supportive community or a caregiver seeking the best options for your loved one, this guide will provide the essential steps to ensure a smooth transition to assisted living in West Hartford. ## Understanding Assisted Living Before embarking on the transition, it is crucial to understand what assisted living entails. Assisted living communities like Avery Heights offer a blend of residential living, personalized support services, and healthcare. These [communities assist](https://averyheights.org/when-to-find-an-an-assisted-living-community-for-your-parents/) with daily activities, such as bathing, dressing, and medication management, while promoting independence and social engagement. ### What to Expect in Assisted Living Assisted living facilities typically offer private or semi-private apartments, communal dining areas, and various recreational activities. Residents receive 24-hour support from trained staff, [ensuring their safety and well-being](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/). The goal is to create a nurturing environment where [seniors can maintain](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) their dignity and enjoy a high quality of life. ### Benefits of Assisted Living Assisted living provides numerous benefits, including access to healthcare professionals, a supportive social network, and peace of mind for both residents and their families. With services tailored to meet individual needs, residents can enjoy a balance of independence and assistance. ### Choosing the Right Community Selecting the right assisted living community is a critical step in the transition process. Factors to consider include location, amenities, staff qualifications, and the overall atmosphere of the community. Visiting multiple facilities and speaking with current residents can offer valuable insights into what to expect. ## Preparing for the Transition Preparation is key to a smooth transition to assisted living. Planning and organizing can help alleviate stress and ensure a positive experience for everyone involved. ### Start Early and Involve Loved Ones Begin the transition process early to allow ample time for research and decision-making. Involve family members and loved ones in the discussions to ensure everyone is on the same page and supportive of the decision. ### Downsizing and Decluttering One of the first steps in preparing for the move is downsizing and decluttering. This process can be emotionally challenging, but it is essential for creating a comfortable and manageable living space in the new community. Focus on keeping sentimental items and essentials, and consider donating or gifting the rest. ### Organize Important Documents Ensure that all important documents, such as medical records, legal papers, and financial information, are organized and easily accessible. Having these documents in order will facilitate a smoother transition and help address any administrative requirements. ## Making the Move The day of the move can be both exciting and stressful. Proper planning and support can make all the difference in ensuring a seamless transition. ### Hire Professional Movers Consider hiring professional movers who specialize in senior relocations. They can handle the logistics of the move, allowing you to focus on providing emotional support to your loved one. ### Create a Comfortable Environment Set up the new living space to resemble the previous home as much as possible. Familiar items, such as photographs, favorite furniture, and cherished mementos, can create a sense of continuity and comfort. ### Plan for Emotional Support Moving to a new environment can be emotionally taxing. Ensure that emotional support is available, whether through family members, friends, or professional counselors. Encourage open communication and provide reassurance throughout the process. ## Settling In Once the move is complete, it is important to help your loved one settle into their new home and establish a routine. ### Engage in Community Activities Encourage participation in the community’s [social and recreational activities](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/). This will help build connections with other residents and create a sense of belonging. Group outings, fitness classes, and arts and crafts can be enjoyable and therapeutic. ### Establish a Daily Routine A consistent daily routine can provide structure and stability. Work with the assisted living staff to establish a schedule that includes meal times, medication management, and participation in community activities. ### Foster Independence Allow your loved one to make choices about their daily activities and [personal preferences to promote independence](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/). Assisted living communities are designed to support autonomy while providing necessary assistance. ## Building Relationships Building relationships within the assisted living community can enhance the overall experience and contribute to a sense of community. ### Get to Know the Staff Establishing positive relationships with the staff is essential for a successful transition. Take the time to get to know the caregivers, nurses, and administrative staff. Open communication and mutual respect can foster a collaborative and supportive environment. ### Connect with Other Residents Encourage your loved one to connect with other residents. Shared meals, group activities, and common areas provide opportunities for social interaction and friendship. Building these connections can significantly [improve the quality of life](https://averyheights.org/10-ways-assisted-living-can-improve-your-quality-of-life/) in the community. ### Participate in Family Events Many assisted living communities host family events and gatherings. Participate in these events to [stay connected and involved in your loved one’s life](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/). These occasions also provide opportunities to meet other families and share experiences. ## Addressing Concerns It is natural to have concerns and questions during the transition to assisted living. Addressing these concerns promptly can help ease the adjustment process. ### Monitor Health and Well-being Monitor your loved one’s health and well-being regularly. Stay in touch with the assisted living staff and attend care meetings to stay informed about their progress and any changes in their care needs. ### Address Emotional Needs Keep an eye on your loved one’s emotional well-being. Moving to a new environment can trigger feelings of loneliness or anxiety. Provide emotional support and encourage them to express their feelings. ### Seek Professional Guidance If you encounter challenges during the transition, do not hesitate to seek professional guidance. Social workers, counselors, and geriatric [care managers can offer valuable support](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/) and resources. ## Conclusion Transitioning to an assisted living community in West Hartford can be a positive and enriching experience with the right preparation and support. You can ensure a smooth and successful transition by understanding what to expect, involving loved ones, and fostering a sense of community. Remember, the goal is to create an environment where seniors can thrive and enjoy a high quality of life. If you want personalized assistance or more information about transitioning to assisted living, consider [contacting our Avery Heights experts](https://averyheights.org/contact-retirement-community-hartford-ct/). Our dedicated team is here to help you every step of the way. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Discover the Ideal Assisted Living Facilities in West Hartford for Your Loved Ones](https://averyheights.org/discover-west-hartford-assisted-living/) **Published:** July 24, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![West Hartford Assisted Living, Senior Assisted Living Community Social](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/40956-300x212.jpg "Senior people watching televison together - Avery Heights")Senior people watching television together Finding the perfect living arrangement for seniors can be daunting, especially when considering assisted living facilities. In West Hartford Assisted Living, several options offer excellent care, a wide range of services, and vibrant communities. This blog post is tailored to help caregivers, seniors, and West Hartford residents understand what makes assisted living facilities in this area unique so you can make an informed decision for yourself or your loved ones. ## Understanding West Hartford Assisted Living Facilities ### What Are Assisted Living Facilities? Assisted living facilities are residential communities designed to support seniors who need help with daily activities while allowing as much independence as possible. These facilities provide a blend of care and autonomy, ensuring that residents receive assistance with bathing, dressing, and medication management while enjoying the freedom to participate in [social activities and maintain](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) personal routines. ### Types of Assisted Living Facilities Available In West Hartford, assisted living facilities come in various forms. Some are part of larger [senior living communities](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/senior-living-community-moving-day/) that offer a continuum of care, including independent living and skilled nursing services. Others are standalone facilities that focus exclusively on assisted living. Each type of facility offers unique benefits, so it’s important to consider what best meets the needs of the senior in your life. ### Key Factors to Consider When Choosing an Assisted Living Facility When selecting an assisted living facility, there are several critical factors to keep in mind: - ****Location****: Proximity to family and friends can significantly impact the quality of life. - ****Services Offered****: Ensure the facility provides the necessary care and amenities. - ****Cost****: Understand the pricing structure and what is included in the fees. - ****Reputation****: Look for reviews and testimonials from current or past residents and their families. - ****Visit****: Take a tour to get a feel for the community and see if it fits well. ## Services and Amenities Offered ### Comprehensive Care Services Assisted living facilities in West Hartford provide various services designed to support seniors in their daily lives. These typically include 24-hour care, meal plans, housekeeping, and transportation. The goal is to create a safe and [comfortable environment where seniors](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) can thrive without worrying about daily chores. ### Unique Amenities That Set Facilities Apart Many facilities offer unique [amenities that enhance the living experience](https://averyheights.org/experience-unparalleled-comfort-luxury-amenities-at-avery-heights/) in addition to standard services. For instance, Avery Heights in Hartford, CT, features a state-of-the-art Wellness Center that encourages residents to stay active and healthy. Other amenities might include beautiful outdoor spaces, on-site beauty salons, [fitness centers,](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) and even entertainment rooms for movies and games. ### Specialized Care Options Some facilities offer specialized [services for seniors with specific health](https://averyheights.org/health-services/) needs, such as those requiring memory care. These programs are designed to provide a safe and supportive environment for individuals living with Alzheimer’s or other forms of dementia. At Avery Heights, for example, the Memory Care unit ensures that residents receive compassionate, resident-centered [care that respects their dignity and supports](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/) their well-being. ## Life in Assisted Living: What to Expect ### A Day in the Life of a Resident Life in an assisted living facility is structured to balance care and independence. A typical day might start with a nutritious breakfast followed by a morning exercise class or a garden stroll. Residents then participate in various activities, such as arts and crafts, book clubs, or social gatherings. Meals are shared in communal dining areas, fostering community and sociability. ### Social Activities and Events for Seniors in West Hartford Assisted living facilities often organize various social activities to keep residents engaged and connected. These might include themed parties, live music performances, educational workshops, and excursions to [local attractions](https://averyheights.org/our-location/local-attractions/) in West Hartford. Such activities not only provide entertainment but also promote mental and emotional well-being. ### Building a Supportive Community One of the most significant benefits of assisted living is the sense of community it offers. Residents can make new friends, share experiences, and support one another. This camaraderie can be incredibly comforting and enriching, especially for those who may have felt isolated living alone. ## Choosing the Right Facility ### Factors to Consider When Selecting an Assisted Living Facility Choosing the right assisted living facility involves careful consideration of several factors. Start by identifying the senior’s specific needs and preferences. Consider the level of care required, the types of activities and amenities that are important, and the overall atmosphere of the facility. Discussing these factors with the [seniors is essential to ensure](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) their preferences are honored. ### Testimonials and Reviews from Residents and Their Families Reading testimonials and reviews can provide valuable insights into a facility’s quality of life. For example, residents at Avery Heights have praised the community for its caring staff and [engaging activities](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/). One resident’s family member noted, “The compassionate care my mother receives at Avery Heights gives me peace of mind knowing she’s in good hands.” ### Visiting and Touring Facilities Whenever possible, [schedule visits](https://averyheights.org/our-location/schedule-a-visit/) and tours of potential facilities. This firsthand experience allows you to observe the environment, interact with staff and residents, and ask specific [questions about care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/answers-to-important-questions-memory-care/) and services. Many facilities, like Avery Heights, welcome tours and can be contacted directly to arrange a visit. ## Supporting Caregivers in West Hartford Assisted Living ### Resources and Support for Caregivers in the Community Caregiving can be challenging and demanding, but West Hartford has resources available to [support caregivers](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-6/). Local organizations, [support groups,](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-2/) and caregiver workshops provide valuable information, emotional support, and practical advice. These resources can help caregivers manage stress, improve their caregiving skills, and connect with others in similar situations. ### Tips for Transitioning a Loved One to Assisted Living Transitioning a loved one to assisted living can be a significant change for both the senior and the caregiver. Here are some [tips to make the process](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-understanding-the-aging-process_-health-and-wellness-tips-for-seniors-at-avery-heights/) smoother: 1. ****Communicate Openly****: Discuss the move openly and honestly with your loved one, addressing any concerns or fears they may have. 2. ****Involve Them in the Decision****: Allow the seniors to participate in choosing the facility and personalizing their new living space. 3. ****Visit Frequently****: Regular visits can help ease the transition and ensure the senior feels supported and connected. ### Maintaining a Strong Relationship Even after the move to assisted living, maintaining a strong relationship with your loved one is crucial. Regular visits, phone calls, and participating in community activities together can strengthen your bond and ensure they continue to feel loved and supported. ## Conclusion In summary, assisted living facilities in West Hartford provide an excellent option for seniors who need support while maintaining their independence. These communities offer comprehensive care, unique amenities, and a vibrant social environment that [enhances the quality of life](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-the-quality-of-life-for-seniors-with-memory-care-at-avery-heights/) for residents. For caregivers and families, these facilities also provide peace of mind, knowing their loved ones are in a safe and caring environment. If you’re considering assisted living for yourself or a loved one, take the time to explore your options, visit facilities, and ask questions. If you need further assistance, don’t hesitate to contact local resources or consult with professionals who can guide you through the process. Your next step could lead to a wonderful new chapter in your loved one’s life. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Dementia Care in Hartford, CT: A Family Guide](https://averyheights.org/dementia-care-in-hartford-ct-a-family-guide/) **Published:** November 1, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Watching a loved one navigate the challenges of needing dementia care is a deeply personal and often overwhelming experience. As memory fades and daily tasks become more difficult, families are faced with the difficult question of how to provide the best possible care. For many, this journey leads them to explore specialized support systems designed to enhance safety, engagement, and overall quality of life. This guide is for families in Hartford, CT, who are seeking information and support. We will explore the complexities of dementia, the challenges of caregiving at home, and the benefits of professional [dementia care](https://averyheights.org/compassionate-dementia-care-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/ "Compassionate Dementia Care in Hartford, CT | Avery Heights"). Whether you are just beginning to notice changes in a loved one or are considering long-term care options like memory care in Hartford, CT, this article will provide you with the knowledge and resources to make informed decisions for your family. ## Understanding Dementia Before exploring care options, it’s important to understand what dementia is. Dementia is not a specific disease but an umbrella term for a range of cognitive symptoms, including memory loss, impaired judgment, and difficulty with communication. These symptoms are severe enough to interfere with a person’s daily life. While there are many types of dementia, some of the most common include: - **Alzheimer’s Disease:** The most prevalent form, accounting for 60-80% of cases. It’s characterized by the progressive decline of memory and other cognitive functions. - **Vascular Dementia:** Often caused by a stroke or other conditions that block or reduce blood flow to the brain. Symptoms can appear suddenly and may progress in a step-like pattern. - **Lewy Body Dementia (LBD):** Involves abnormal deposits of a protein called alpha-synuclein in the brain. Symptoms often include visual hallucinations, fluctuations in alertness, and movement problems similar to Parkinson’s disease. - **Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD):** Affects the frontal and temporal lobes of the brain, leading to changes in personality, behavior, and language. Early signs of dementia can be subtle and are often mistaken for normal aging. They might include misplacing items, forgetting recent conversations, or having trouble finding the right words. As the condition progresses, these symptoms become more pronounced. An early diagnosis is crucial because it allows families to plan for the future, access treatments that may slow progression, and connect with essential support services. If you notice these signs in a loved one, consulting a healthcare professional is the first and most important step. ## The Challenges of Caring for a Loved One at Home Caring for someone with dementia at home is an act of love, but it comes with significant challenges. Family caregivers often find themselves managing an ever-increasing list of responsibilities, from administering medication and preparing meals to assisting with personal hygiene and mobility. The emotional toll can be immense. Witnessing the cognitive decline of a parent, spouse, or sibling is heartbreaking. Caregivers often experience stress, anxiety, and feelings of isolation. The physical demands are also taxing, with many caregivers reporting exhaustion and burnout from the round-the-clock nature of their duties. Furthermore, safety becomes a major concern as dementia advances. Individuals may wander, become disoriented even in familiar surroundings, or forget to turn off appliances. Creating a completely safe home environment requires constant vigilance and modifications that may not always be feasible. These mounting pressures often lead families to consider specialized dementia care options that can provide a safer, more structured environment. ## What Are Memory Care Communities? When home care is no longer sufficient, many families turn to memory care communities. These are specialized residential facilities designed exclusively for individuals with dementia and other forms of memory impairment. While they may fall under the umbrella of [senior living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "senior living"), [memory care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "Memory Care") is distinct from traditional [assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/ "Assisted Living"). An assisted living facility primarily helps seniors with daily activities like bathing and dressing. In contrast, memory care communities provide a higher level of specialized support tailored to the unique needs of residents with cognitive decline. This specialized care includes secure environments to prevent wandering, staff trained in dementia communication techniques, and structured activities designed to engage residents and support cognitive function. The goal is to create a safe, supportive, and stimulating setting where individuals can live with dignity and purpose. ## Key Features of Dementia Care in Hartford, CT Hartford is home to a variety of [senior living](https://averyheights.org/the-importance-of-emotional-wellness-in-senior-living-at-avery-heights/ "The Importance of Emotional Wellness in Senior Living at Avery Heights") options, and its memory care facilities are equipped with features specifically designed to support residents with dementia. When exploring dementia care in Hartford, you’ll find programs and environments built around safety, engagement, and expert support. - **Specialized Care Programs:** Facilities offer person-centered care plans that are tailored to each resident’s cognitive abilities, personal history, and preferences. This ensures that care is both respectful and effective. - **Advanced Safety Features:** Safety is a top priority. Communities are designed with secure layouts, including enclosed courtyards and gardens, to allow residents to move freely without the risk of wandering. Monitoring systems and emergency call buttons provide an extra layer of security. - **Highly Trained Staff:** The staff in Hartford’s memory care communities receive ongoing training in dementia care. They learn effective communication strategies, how to manage challenging behaviors with compassion, and techniques to help residents feel understood and calm. ## Benefits of Memory Care Facilities Choosing a [memory care facility](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-right-memory-care-facilities-avery-heights-approach/ "Choosing the Right Memory Care Facility: Avery Heights’ Approach") can bring profound benefits not only for the individual with dementia but for the entire family. - **Improved Quality of Life:** With 24/7 support, structured routines, and engaging activities, residents often experience a notable improvement in their overall well-being. They have opportunities for social interaction that may have been lacking at home, which can reduce feelings of loneliness and depression. - **Reduced Caregiver Stress:** For families, the peace of mind that comes from knowing their loved one is safe and well-cared for is invaluable. It allows caregivers to transition from being full-time care providers back to being spouses, children, and grandchildren. This shift can help restore relationships and alleviate the burnout that so many caregivers experience. - **Social Engagement:** Isolation can accelerate cognitive decline. Memory care facilities foster a sense of community. Residents participate in group activities, share meals, and build friendships with peers, all within a supportive and understanding environment. ## Therapeutic Activities and Therapies A cornerstone of quality dementia care is the array of therapeutic activities offered. These programs are designed to stimulate the mind, engage the senses, and bring joy to residents. - **Music and Art Therapy:** These creative therapies can unlock emotions and memories, even when verbal communication is difficult. Listening to familiar songs or painting can be calming and provide a powerful outlet for self-expression. - **Reminiscence Therapy:** This involves discussing past events and experiences, often with the help of old photos, familiar objects, or music. It helps residents connect with their personal history and reinforces their sense of identity. - **Physical and Cognitive Activities:** Gentle exercises like chair yoga or guided walks help maintain mobility and physical health. Cognitive activities, such as puzzles, memory games, and storytelling, are designed to engage the mind and may help slow the rate of cognitive decline. ## How to Choose a Memory Care Facility in Hartford, CT Finding the right “[memory care near me](https://averyheights.org/leading-memory-care-facility-near-me-in-hartford-ct/ "Leading Memory Care Facility Near Me in Hartford, CT")” can feel daunting. Here is a checklist to guide your search for memory care facilities in the Hartford area: 1. **Assess Your Needs:** Make a list of what is most important for your loved one. Consider their level of care, personality, and what kind of environment they would find most comfortable. 2. **Location and Cost:** Look for facilities that are conveniently located for family visits. Inquire about the monthly costs and what services are included. 3. **Visit in Person:** The best way to evaluate a community is to visit it. Schedule tours at several different facilities to compare. Pay attention to the atmosphere, the cleanliness of the environment, and how the staff interacts with residents. 4. **Evaluate Staffing:** Ask about the staff-to-resident ratio, the level of training for caregivers, and staff turnover rates. A stable, well-trained team is a sign of a quality facility. 5. **Observe the Residents:** Do the residents seem happy and engaged? Are they participating in activities, or are they mostly isolated in their rooms? 6. **Review the Services:** Look at the dining menu, the monthly activity calendar, and the types of personal care services offered. Trust your instincts. The right community will feel warm, welcoming, and safe. ## The Cost of Dementia Care in Hartford, CT The cost of memory care in Hartford can vary based on the facility’s location, the amenities offered, and the level of care required. On average, families can expect memory care to be more expensive than traditional assisted living due to the specialized staffing and security features. Several financial assistance options may be available to help cover the costs: - **Medicaid:** In Connecticut, the Connecticut Home Care Program for Elders (CHCPE) may help cover some costs for eligible individuals. - **Medicare:** While Medicare does not typically cover long-term custodial care, it may cover short-term stays in a skilled nursing facility after a hospital visit or certain medical services within a memory care community. - **VA Benefits:** Veterans and their spouses may be eligible for benefits, such as the Aid and Attendance pension, which can help pay for long-term care. - **Long-Term Care Insurance:** If your loved one has a long-term care insurance policy, it will likely cover a significant portion of the cost. ## Local Resources for Hartford Families Navigating a dementia diagnosis is not something you have to do alone. Hartford offers a wealth of resources for families: - **Alzheimer’s Association, Connecticut Chapter:** Provides support groups, educational workshops, and a 24/7 helpline. They are an invaluable resource for information and emotional support. - **Connecticut Area Agencies on Aging:** These agencies can connect you with local services, including respite care, caregiver training programs, and information on financial assistance. - **Local Support Groups:** Joining a support group allows you to connect with other caregivers who understand what you are going through. Sharing experiences and advice can be incredibly helpful. ## Real Stories of Hope Many families in Hartford have found renewed hope and peace after transitioning a loved one to memory care. Sarah, whose mother has Alzheimer’s, shared her experience: “We were stretched so thin trying to care for Mom at home. Since she moved into her memory care community, she is thriving. She participates in art classes and has made new friends. We can finally just enjoy our time with her without the stress of being her caregivers.” Another family member, Mark, noted the change in his father’s demeanor. “Dad was becoming very withdrawn at home. Now, he’s more engaged than he’s been in years. The staff knows how to connect with him, and the structured environment has made a huge difference.” These stories highlight the transformative impact that specialized dementia care can have. ## Finding the Right Path Forward Deciding on the best course of action for a loved one with dementia is one of the most significant decisions a family can make. The journey is challenging, but you don’t have to walk it alone. Specialized dementia care in Hartford offers a pathway to safety, dignity, and a higher quality of life for your loved one, while providing much-needed support and peace of mind for you. By exploring the resources and facilities available, you can find a solution that honors your loved one’s needs and allows your family to focus on what truly matters: cherishing the time you have together. If you’re ready to learn more, we encourage you to contact a local memory care facility in [Hartford](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home "Hartford") to schedule a visit and discuss how they can support your family. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Memory Care Near Me: Hartford, CT Options for Families](https://averyheights.org/memory-care-near-me-hartford-ct-options-for-families/) **Published:** December 15, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![memory care near me ](https://skylinespace.nyc3.cdn.digitaloceanspaces.com/media/images/hartford_023_5859_up.jpg)--- Searching for **memory care near me** is often one of the most emotional and urgent decisions a family can face. Whether a loved one has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease or dementia—or their needs have progressed beyond what can be safely managed at home—families in **Hartford, Connecticut** have access to high-quality memory care options designed to provide safety, dignity, and meaningful daily life. This in-depth guide explores what memory care is, why Hartford is a strong location for dementia care, and how families can confidently choose the right memory care community near them. --- ## What Does “Memory Care Near Me” Mean? When families search for **memory care near me**, they are typically looking for: - Specialized care for [Alzheimer’s disease](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/answers-to-important-questions-memory-care/ "Answers to Important Questions: Memory Care") or [dementia](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-right-memory-care-facilities-avery-heights-approach/ "Choosing the Right Memory Care Facility: Avery Heights’ Approach") - A secure, structured environment - Trained caregivers available 24/7 - A location close to home for easy visits Memory care is a **dedicated level of senior living** that goes beyond assisted living by focusing specifically on cognitive support, safety, and emotional well-being. Unlike traditional senior housing, memory care communities are intentionally designed to reduce confusion, prevent wandering, and support residents through every stage of cognitive decline. --- ## Why Memory Care Is Different From Assisted Living Many families initially explore assisted living, but memory care provides additional layers of support that are essential for individuals living with dementia. ### Key Differences Include: - **Specialized dementia training** for staff - **Secure environments** with monitored access - **Structured daily routines** to reduce anxiety - **Cognitive-focused activities and therapies** - **Higher staff-to-resident ratios** If a loved one is experiencing memory loss, confusion, or safety risks, searching for *memory care near me* is often the most appropriate next step. --- ## Why Hartford, CT Is a Trusted Choice for Memory Care ![Hartford, CT](https://t14361490.p.clickup-attachments.com/t14361490/be0d119e-56ec-4252-bf2a-7d5e6cb65042/image.png) Hartford and the surrounding communities offer a strong foundation for high-quality memory care. ### 1. Access to Advanced Healthcare Hartford is home to major hospitals, specialists, and neurological care providers, making it easier to coordinate medical services for residents with dementia-related conditions. ### 2. Established Senior Living Communities The Hartford area has a long history of senior care excellence, with memory care communities that emphasize compassionate, person-centered support. ### 3. Central Location for Families Hartford’s central location allows families from West Hartford, Bloomfield, Newington, Wethersfield, and East Hartford to visit frequently and stay involved in care. ### 4. Calm, Residential Environments Many memory care communities near Hartford are located in quiet, residential settings—ideal for individuals who benefit from low-stimulation surroundings. --- ## What Services Do Memory Care Communities Near You Provide? When evaluating memory care near you in Hartford, look for communities that provide comprehensive support across physical, emotional, and cognitive needs. ### Core Memory Care Services Include: - 24/7 supervision and assistance - Personalized dementia care plans - Medication management - Nutritious meals and dining assistance - Housekeeping and laundry services ### Cognitive & Emotional Support: - Memory-enhancing activities - Music and art therapy - Gentle fitness and movement programs - Social engagement and sensory stimulation These services work together to promote comfort, familiarity, and quality of life. --- ## Signs It May Be Time to Look for Memory Care Near Me Families often begin searching for memory care when they notice changes such as: - Wandering or getting lost - Increased confusion or agitation - Difficulty recognizing familiar people - Unsafe behaviors at home - Decline in personal hygiene or nutrition - Caregiver stress or burnout Recognizing these signs early can help families transition a loved one into memory care before a crisis occurs. --- ## The Importance of a Secure Memory Care Environment Safety is a cornerstone of memory care. Communities near Hartford are designed with features such as: - Secured entrances and exits - Enclosed outdoor courtyards - Simple, intuitive layouts - Clear visual cues and signage These design elements help residents feel comfortable while reducing anxiety and the risk of wandering. --- ## What to Look for When Touring Memory Care Near You When visiting memory care communities in Hartford, families should ask thoughtful questions and observe daily life. ### Key Questions to Ask: - How is staff trained in dementia care? - What is the staff-to-resident ratio? - How are behavioral changes handled? - What does a typical day look like? - How are families kept informed? Also observe how caregivers interact with residents—warmth, patience, and respect are essential indicators of quality care. --- ## Cost of Memory Care Near Me in Hartford, CT Memory care costs vary depending on the level of care, apartment type, and services provided. While memory care typically costs more than assisted living, it includes a significantly higher level of supervision and expertise. Memory care pricing often includes: - Housing and utilities - Meals and snacks - Daily care assistance - Cognitive programming - Security and supervision Families should ask communities about: - What services are included - Additional care fees - Acceptance of long-term care insurance or Medicaid Understanding the full cost structure helps families plan with confidence. --- ## How Memory Care Supports Families, Not Just Residents Choosing memory care near you isn’t only about the resident—it’s also about supporting families. Benefits for families include: - Peace of mind knowing a loved one is safe - Relief from caregiving stress - Guidance from experienced professionals - Ongoing communication and education The best memory care communities view families as partners in care. --- ## Quality of Life in Memory Care Communities Modern memory care goes far beyond basic supervision. The most effective communities focus on **living with purpose**, even as memory loss progresses. Quality memory care emphasizes: - Preserving dignity and independence - Encouraging social connection - Maintaining familiar routines - Honoring personal history and preferences These elements help residents feel valued, understood, and at home. --- ## Planning Ahead for Memory Care Near Me Even if care is not immediately needed, researching memory care near you in Hartford allows families to: - Compare communities without pressure - Understand levels of care available - Prepare financially and emotionally - Make informed, proactive decisions Planning ahead often leads to smoother transitions and better outcomes. --- ## Final Thoughts: Choosing the Right Memory Care Near You in Hartford Searching for **[memory care near me](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/)** is ultimately about finding a place where a loved one can feel safe, supported, and respected. [Hartford, CT](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home) offers a range of memory care options designed to meet the complex needs of individuals living with dementia—while also supporting the families who love them. By focusing on compassionate care, specialized training, secure environments, and meaningful daily experiences, families can find a memory care community near them that truly feels like home. If you are beginning your search, take time to tour communities, ask questions, and trust your instincts. The right memory care option can make a profound difference in quality of life—for both residents and their families **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Senior Living CT: Find the Best Retirement Communities in CT](https://averyheights.org/senior-living-ct-find-the-best-retirement-communities-in-ct/) **Published:** August 12, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Senior Living CT- Find the Best Retirement Communities in CT](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/08/Senior-Living-CT-Find-the-Best-Retirement-Communities-in-CT.jpg "Senior Living CT- Find the Best Retirement Communities in CT - Avery Heights") Searching for senior living CT options often begins with a simple goal. Families want a safe, comfortable, and supportive place where an older loved one can enjoy everyday life with confidence. Older adults want to maintain their independence while gaining access to services and amenities that make life easier. Connecticut offers many senior living choices, ranging from vibrant retirement communities to comprehensive continuing care campuses. Each community offers a different combination of housing, care, social opportunities, and wellness programs. Understanding the differences helps families make informed decisions that support both present and future needs. [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/) offers a welcoming senior living environment with an active lifestyle, personalized support, and future care options. Understanding senior living in Connecticut helps families make confident decisions. ## What is Senior Living in Connecticut? Senior living provides older adults with maintenance-free communities offering services, amenities, and different levels of care. These communities support healthy aging, social connection, safety, and convenience. Depending on the community, residents may enjoy: - Private apartments - Restaurant-style dining - Housekeeping services - Scheduled transportation - Fitness and wellness programs - Cultural and educational activities - Beautiful outdoor spaces - Emergency response systems - Personalized support when needed Many people mistakenly believe senior living only serves individuals with significant health concerns. In reality, many residents move while they remain active and independent so they can enjoy a more fulfilling lifestyle without the responsibilities of home ownership. ## What Types of Senior Living are Available in Connecticut? Connecticut offers several senior living options designed to meet different needs. From independent living to specialized care communities, each option provides unique services and support. Families can explore these choices to find the right fit. ### Independent Living [Independent living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) is ideal for active older adults who want a maintenance-free lifestyle without household responsibilities. Residents can enjoy more freedom without managing repairs, lawn care, or daily upkeep. Residents enjoy private homes or apartments while benefiting from community amenities, dining, events, and recreational activities. Independent living works well for people who want greater freedom rather than additional healthcare. ### Assisted Living [Assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) provides support with daily activities while encouraging independence. Residents may receive support with daily activities to maintain their independence and comfort. This can include medication management, dressing, bathing, personal care, and mobility assistance. Professional caregivers provide personalized support while allowing residents to continue enjoying an active lifestyle. Professional caregivers remain available while residents continue participating in social programs and enjoying an active lifestyle. ### Memory Care [Memory care serves](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) individuals living with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia. Specialized communities provide structured daily routines, secure environments, and cognitive engagement activities. Residents benefit from highly trained caregivers and individualized care plans designed to support their unique needs. Families gain reassurance knowing their loved one receives compassionate support from professionals experienced in dementia care. ### Continuing Care Retirement Communities Many families exploring retirement communities in CT discover Continuing Care Retirement Communities, often called CCRCs. These communities provide flexible care options that support residents as their needs change over time. These communities combine [multiple levels of care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) on one campus, allowing residents to access different services as their needs change. They may transition between independent living, assisted living, skilled nursing, or memory care without relocating. Avery Heights offers residents the advantage of planning for future care while enjoying an active lifestyle today. This approach provides comfort, flexibility, and peace of mind as needs change over time. ## Why are More Older Adults Choosing Senior Living Communities? Senior living has evolved to focus on lifestyle, [wellness](https://averyheights.org/wellness/), and meaningful connections rather than just care. Many older adults choose these communities to enjoy a maintenance-free lifestyle while spending more time on hobbies, travel, fitness, and family activities. Senior living communities encourage social connections through clubs, classes, group outings, and creative activities. Wellness programs, including exercise and nutrition, help residents maintain their overall well-being. For families, senior living offers peace of mind through professional staff, emergency support, and personalized services. These communities create a safe, supportive environment where residents can remain active and connected. ### How does Senior Living Improve Quality of Life? Many people assume moving into senior living means giving something up. Residents frequently discover they gain much more. Without household responsibilities, many people find time to: - Learn new hobbies - Join clubs - Exercise regularly - Attend educational lectures - Volunteer - Build friendships - Spend more time with family - Travel with confidence Access to wellness services, nutritious meals, and [engaging activities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/program-and-activities/) creates an environment that supports healthier aging. Residents often describe feeling more connected, active, and secure than they did while managing a home alone. ## How do you Choose the Right Senior Living Community? [Selecting the right community](https://averyheights.org/our-community/) requires evaluating several important factors. Taking time to compare options helps families find a place that matches their lifestyle, preferences, and future needs. ### Location Many families prefer communities close to relatives, healthcare providers, shopping, and familiar neighborhoods. Remaining near family often encourages more frequent visits and stronger relationships. A convenient location also makes it easier to access local activities, services, and important appointments. Being close to loved ones can help residents maintain meaningful connections and support systems. ### Lifestyle And Amenities Every community offers a unique atmosphere. When touring communities, consider: - [Dining](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/dining/) quality - Apartment layouts - Outdoor spaces - Recreational programs - Wellness offerings - Resident engagement - Transportation services Residents should feel comfortable imagining daily life within the community. The right amenities can enhance comfort, independence, and overall satisfaction. A welcoming environment helps residents enjoy a more fulfilling and active lifestyle. ### Future Care Planning Health needs naturally change over time. Communities offering multiple levels of care provide greater flexibility and may reduce the need for another move later. Long-term planning offers valuable peace of mind. Choosing a community with future care options allows residents to age comfortably in a familiar environment. This flexibility helps families feel prepared for changing needs in the years ahead. ### Staff Experience Compassionate, knowledgeable staff members significantly influence the resident experience. Observe how employees interact with residents during tours. Warm, respectful relationships often reflect a positive community culture. Experienced staff helps create a welcoming atmosphere where residents feel supported and valued. Strong staff relationships contribute to a safer, more comfortable living experience. ## Why Choose Connecticut and Avery Heights for Retirement? Connecticut offers older adults a desirable retirement lifestyle with four distinct seasons, excellent healthcare, cultural attractions, and scenic outdoor spaces. From peaceful communities to vibrant city experiences, the state provides options to match different preferences. Many senior living communities also organize outings to help residents enjoy local attractions year-round. Avery Heights stands out among retirement communities in CT by creating a welcoming environment where residents feel valued and connected. Residents enjoy spacious residences, quality dining, wellness programs, engaging activities, and compassionate support. The [community](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/) is designed to encourage independence while assisting whenever needed. Beyond providing comfortable housing, Avery Heights helps residents build friendships and enjoy meaningful experiences every day. With continuing care options and personalized services, residents can plan confidently for the future. This combination of lifestyle, support, and connection makes Avery Heights a trusted choice for senior living. Residents can enjoy peace of mind while embracing each new chapter of life. ## When Should You Consider Senior Living and What to Expect During a Tour? Many families wait until a crisis occurs before discussing senior living. Planning earlier creates a smoother transition and allows older adults to explore options comfortably. Signs it may be time to consider a community include challenges with home maintenance, reduced social interaction, and growing safety concerns. Other factors may include transportation difficulties, meal preparation challenges, or interest in planning for future care. During a community tour, families should evaluate resident interactions, dining, cleanliness, activities, apartment options, and safety features. Asking questions and speaking with current residents provides valuable insight into daily life. ## Planning for the Future Starts Today Exploring senior living CT options helps older adults and families make confident decisions about the future. Communities like Avery Heights provide comfortable living, engaging experiences, compassionate support, and continuing care in one welcoming environment. Taking time to research options and schedule tours can help families choose a lifestyle that promotes comfort, connection, and peace of mind. Ready to explore exceptional senior living in Connecticut? [Schedule a personal tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) of Avery Heights and experience a welcoming community designed for comfort, connection, and peace of mind. [Contact our team](https://averyheights.org/contact/) today to learn more and find the lifestyle that is right for you. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### Can couples move into senior living even if they have different care needs? Yes. Many senior living communities accommodate couples with different levels of independence. One partner may live independently while the other receives additional support, allowing couples to remain together whenever possible. ### Are overnight guests allowed in senior living communities? Many communities welcome overnight guests, although policies may vary. Guest accommodations and advance notice requirements differ by community, so it is helpful to ask during a tour. ### Can residents continue seeing their own doctors? Yes. Most residents continue visiting their existing physicians and specialists. Many communities also coordinate transportation for medical appointments and can help manage healthcare schedules. ### Are pets allowed in senior living communities? Many Connecticut senior living communities are pet-friendly and welcome certain types of pets. Guidelines regarding size, breed, and care responsibilities vary by community. ### What should someone bring when moving into a senior living apartment? Residents are encouraged to bring familiar furniture, family photographs, artwork, favorite decorations, and personal belongings. Familiar surroundings often make the transition more comfortable and help create a true sense of home. **Categories:** Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Retirement Communities, Senior Living --- ### [No-Buy-In vs. Entrance-Fee Senior Living in Connecticut](https://averyheights.org/no-buy-in-vs-entrance-fee-senior-living-in-connecticut/) **Published:** August 12, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Woman in gloves tending tomato plants in a rooftop garden with sunflowers and a city skyline at sunset.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/08/No-Buy-In-vs-Entrance-Fee-Senior-Living-in-Connecticut.jpg "No-Buy-In vs Entrance-Fee Senior Living in Connecticut - Avery Heights") Choosing a [senior living community](https://averyheights.org/our-community/) involves much more than comparing floor plans or amenities. Financial structure plays a major role in determining whether a community fits a person’s retirement goals, family budget, and long-term plans. Many Connecticut families are surprised to learn that senior living communities do not all follow the same pricing model. Some communities require a significant entrance payment before a resident moves in. Others operate on a rental basis and do not require a large upfront investment. Understanding the difference helps families make informed decisions without unnecessary financial stress. This allows retirees to compare options with greater confidence. For older adults seeking flexibility, predictable expenses, and simplified financial planning, rental communities have become an increasingly attractive option. They offer a practical approach to retirement living without a substantial initial financial commitment. [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/) is one of the few senior living communities in Connecticut that offers quality senior living without a buy-in fee in CT. This rental approach makes it easier for residents to access supportive services while preserving their financial resources. ## Difference between No Buy-In and Entrance Fee Senior Living Senior living communities generally use one of two financial models. Understanding how each model works is an important part of choosing the right community. The financial structure can affect upfront costs, monthly expenses, and long-term planning. While both options provide access to senior living [services and amenities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/), they differ significantly in how residents pay for their housing and care. Comparing these models helps families select the option that best supports their financial goals and lifestyle preferences. ### Entrance Fee Senior Living Entrance fee communities require residents to pay a substantial upfront fee before moving into the community. Depending on the residence type and contract, the entrance payment may range from several hundred thousand dollars to more than one million dollars. Residents also continue paying monthly service fees throughout their stay. Entrance fee communities are commonly associated with Continuing Care Retirement Communities, where multiple levels of care are available within one campus. ### No Buy-In Senior Living [Rental senior living communities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/apartments/) do not require a large upfront entrance payment. Instead, residents typically pay a monthly fee that covers housing, services, amenities, [dining](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/dining/), maintenance, and lifestyle offerings. A resident may only need to pay a standard security deposit or community fee depending on the provider. A rental model allows seniors to move into a supportive community without tying up significant retirement savings. ## Why do some Communities Charge an Entrance Fee? Entrance fees help finance community operations, future care commitments, and long-term infrastructure improvements. Many Continuing Care Retirement Communities offer contracts that provide access to [assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/), [rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/), or skilled nursing if care needs change. Extensive entrance fee contracts typically provide comprehensive coverage for future care with only limited increases in costs, offering greater financial predictability over time. Modified contracts include partial coverage for future care. Additional services are available as needed for an extra cost. Fee-for-service contracts generally require residents to pay separately for future healthcare services as their needs change. This option offers greater flexibility but may result in higher healthcare expenses over time. Each contract differs in financial obligations, refund policies, and future healthcare costs. Families should carefully review every agreement before committing. ## Why are Rental Senior Living Communities Becoming More Popular? Many retirees today prioritize flexibility over long-term financial commitments. Modern retirement planning has changed significantly during the past decade. Older adults often prefer maintaining greater control over investments while avoiding large upfront expenditures. Many retirees value the flexibility and simplicity that rental communities provide. Rather than making a large upfront investment, they can enjoy supportive services through predictable monthly payments. Rental senior living offers several advantages. ### Greater Financial Flexibility Large entrance fees may require selling investments, liquidating savings, or using proceeds from a home sale. Rental communities allow residents to preserve financial assets for future needs, travel, [healthcare](https://averyheights.org/health-services/), or family support. This approach helps retirees maintain greater control over their finances. Savings can remain available for unexpected expenses or personal goals. It also reduces the pressure of making a substantial upfront financial commitment. ### Easier Financial Planning Monthly rental payments are generally easier to budget than combining a large entrance fee with ongoing monthly expenses. Families often appreciate having a clearer understanding of recurring costs. Predictable monthly expenses can make retirement budgeting more manageable. This simplicity may reduce financial uncertainty for both residents and their families. It also supports more informed long-term financial planning. ### Simpler Transition Many seniors decide to move after experiencing health changes, losing a spouse, or seeking relief from home maintenance. Rental communities often allow a smoother transition without waiting to complete complicated financial arrangements. The move can often be completed more quickly and with less financial complexity. Residents can begin enjoying community amenities and support services sooner. This can help adjusting to [senior living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) feel less overwhelming. ### More Freedom for Future Decisions Personal circumstances may change over time. A rental model provides greater flexibility if a resident later chooses to relocate closer to family or pursue another living arrangement. This flexibility can provide valuable peace of mind as needs evolve. Residents have greater freedom to adjust their living arrangements if priorities change. It also supports retirement planning without a long-term financial commitment. For many older adults, rental senior living offers a practical balance of financial flexibility, convenience, and supportive services. By removing the need for a large upfront investment, it allows retirees to focus on enjoying an active and fulfilling retirement with greater peace of mind. ## Who Benefits Most from Rental Senior Living Without a Buy-In Fee? [Rental senior living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/) appeals to a variety of lifestyles and financial situations. It is often a good choice for homeowners who want to preserve the proceeds from selling their home and retirees who prefer maintaining their investment portfolios. Families seeking predictable monthly expenses may also appreciate the simplicity of a rental model. Seniors relocating from another state and adults who value the flexibility to move in the future often benefit from a rental community. Individuals who do not want to commit a significant portion of their retirement savings to housing may also find this option appealing. Each person’s financial goals should be carefully considered before making a decision. When comparing communities, families should evaluate upfront costs, monthly fees, healthcare coverage, refund policies, and long-term flexibility. They should also consider the opportunity cost of paying a large entrance fee instead of keeping those funds available for future needs. Rental communities eliminate this major upfront investment while supporting greater financial flexibility and simpler retirement planning. This allows retirees to preserve more of their savings for future [healthcare needs](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/), travel, or other personal priorities. ## Choosing the Right Rental Senior Living Community in Connecticut Every senior living community operates differently, so it is important to compare financial models carefully. Families should ask about move-in fees, refundable payments, and the services included in the monthly costs. They should also understand how often monthly fees may increase. It is also important to ask about on-site healthcare and future care options. Families should also inquire about additional charges and whether residents can leave without financial penalties. Asking these questions early helps avoid unexpected costs and supports better planning. Many retirees choose rental senior living near Hartford for its convenient location and maintenance-free lifestyle. Residents enjoy easy access to healthcare, dining, wellness programs, transportation, and [social activities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/program-and-activities/). These benefits support an active retirement while providing comfort, convenience, and peace of mind. ## What Makes Avery Heights Different? Many senior living communities in Connecticut require significant upfront entrance fees. Avery Heights offers a different approach. Residents enjoy a welcoming senior living environment without a buy-in fee in CT. This rental model provides greater financial flexibility while offering supportive services and engaging lifestyle opportunities. Residents benefit from spacious private residences designed for comfort and independence. They also enjoy restaurant-style dining with delicious and convenient meal options. Wellness and [fitness opportunities](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/), beautiful outdoor spaces, and a variety of social programs and educational events encourage an active and engaging lifestyle. Professional staff is available throughout the community to assist whenever needed, while maintenance-free living eliminates the burdens of home upkeep. As residents’ needs change over time, personalized support is available every step of the way. This helps residents continue enjoying a comfortable and fulfilling retirement. Without a substantial entrance payment, they can maintain greater control over their finances. For many families, removing this financial barrier makes the transition to senior living much less stressful. ## How can Families Decide Which Option is Right? Every retirement journey is unique. Some retirees value guaranteed long-term care arrangements associated with entrance fee communities. Others place greater importance on preserving assets, maintaining flexibility, and simplifying financial planning through rental living. The best decision begins with open conversations involving family members, financial advisors, and senior living professionals. Topics worth discussing include your current retirement income and long-term healthcare expectations. These conversations can help ensure the chosen community aligns with your financial resources and future care needs. It is also important to consider your estate planning priorities, desired lifestyle, and preferred level of financial flexibility. Additionally, discussing the possibility of future relocation can help you choose a senior living option that supports your long-term goals and changing circumstances. Taking time to compare communities supports informed decision-making. Discover how rental senior living without a buy-in fee can support your retirement goals. [Schedule a tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) of Avery Heights to explore our community, meet our team, and learn more about our [flexible senior living options](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/). ## Frequently Asked Questions ### Can I use long-term care insurance in a rental senior living community? Many long-term care insurance policies may help cover eligible care-related services, depending on the policy terms. Review coverage details with the insurance provider before making a decision. ### Does moving into senior living affect Medicare benefits? Medicare covers your medical services across the United States regardless of where you choose to live. However, it does not pay for non-medical expenses like rent, food, or general assisted living costs. ### Should adult children be involved in financial planning for senior living? Family participation can be valuable when reviewing budgets, comparing contracts, and discussing long-term goals, especially if future caregiving responsibilities may arise. ### How early should someone begin researching senior living options? Beginning the search while living independently provides more time to compare communities, evaluate finances, and make thoughtful decisions without feeling rushed. ### Can couples choose different levels of support while living in the same community? Many senior living communities can accommodate couples with different care needs, allowing each person to receive appropriate support while remaining close together. **Categories:** Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Assisted Living, Senior Living --- ### [Moving a Parent into Assisted Living in Connecticut: Step by Step](https://averyheights.org/moving-a-parent-into-assisted-living-in-connecticut-step-by-step/) **Published:** August 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Older woman sitting in a chair holding a framed family photo while a man kneels beside her in a living room with moving boxes nearby.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/08/How-to-Move-a-Parent-to-Assisted-Living-in-Connecticut.jpg "How to Move a Parent to Assisted Living in Connecticut - Avery Heights") Moving a parent into [assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) is one of the most meaningful decisions a family can make. The process often brings a mix of emotions, including relief, uncertainty, hope, and concern. Adult children frequently find themselves balancing practical responsibilities. They also want to honour their parent’s independence and personal preferences. Families across Connecticut often begin planning after noticing changes in mobility, memory, medication management, nutrition, or home safety. While the transition may feel overwhelming at first, approaching each step with patience and preparation can make the experience much smoother for everyone involved. A well-planned move does more than relocate belongings. It creates a safe environment where older adults can receive personalised support, enjoy meaningful social opportunities, and maintain their dignity. Knowing what to expect before, during, and after the move helps families avoid common challenges. It also allows them to make more informed decisions. The following guide explains how to move a parent into assisted living in Connecticut through a practical, step-by-step approach that supports both the older adult and their family. ## Why do Families Decide it is Time for Assisted Living? Every family’s situation is unique, yet several common signs often indicate that additional support would improve an older adult’s quality of life. Many parents begin experiencing challenges with daily tasks such as meal preparation, medication management, housekeeping, or personal care. Falls, frequent hospital visits, increasing isolation, or caregiver burnout may also signal that living independently has become more challenging. Assisted living provides a balance between independence and support. Residents continue enjoying private living spaces while receiving help with daily activities whenever needed. Many communities also offer [wellness programmes](https://averyheights.org/wellness/), chef-prepared meals, housekeeping, transportation, and social events that promote healthier ageing. Choosing assisted living before a crisis occurs gives older adults more time to adjust comfortably and take part in the decision-making process. It allows for a smoother transition. ## How can you Start Planning the Move? Planning early is one of the most effective ways to reduce stress. Start by having [open conversations](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/talking-to-your-loved-one/) with your parent. Focus on their goals rather than their limitations. Ask what matters most to them, whether it is maintaining independence, staying socially active, or receiving assistance with daily tasks. [Gather important information](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/) about your parent’s current situation before beginning the transition. This includes details about existing medical conditions, medication lists, and emergency contacts. Families should also organise insurance information, legal documents, and financial records to ensure everything is prepared before the move. Having these details readily available helps create a smoother process and supports better care planning. Creating a timeline allows the family to complete tasks gradually instead of rushing through major decisions. Scheduling visits to several assisted living communities in Connecticut provides valuable opportunities to compare services and meet staff members. It also helps families understand each [community’s culture and environment](https://averyheights.org/our-community/). ## How do you Choose the Right Assisted Living Community? Selecting an assisted living community involves much more than comparing floor plans or amenities. Families should evaluate how well each community meets both current and future care needs. Important considerations include: - Personalised care services - Staff availability - Safety features - Dining quality - Resident activities - Wellness programmes - Healthcare coordination - Transportation services - Family communication - Overall community atmosphere During community visits, observe how staff interact with residents, as warm and respectful relationships often reflect a supportive culture. Speaking with residents and families can also provide valuable insight into daily life within the community. For families considering senior living in Connecticut, [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/) offers personalised care and engaging lifestyle opportunities. Its welcoming environment supports independence while providing assistance whenever needed. ## What Legal and Financial Documents Should Be Prepared? Organisation becomes especially important before moving day. Families should gather and review essential documents well in advance. These may include: - Identification documents - Medicare information - Health insurance cards - Long-term care insurance policies - Advance healthcare directives - Durable power of attorney - Living will - Medication records - Physician contact information - Emergency contact list Financial planning helps families understand costs, benefits, and payment options before making decisions. Consulting a financial adviser or elder law attorney can provide guidance on estate planning and long-term strategies. ## How Should you Help a Parent Downsize? Downsizing often becomes the most emotional part of the transition. A lifetime of memories can be attached to furniture, photographs, family heirlooms, and everyday belongings. Allowing enough time for thoughtful decisions helps reduce anxiety and prevents feelings of loss. Instead of focusing on what must be left behind, concentrate on creating a familiar and comfortable new home. Encourage your parent to choose meaningful possessions that will make their new living space feel familiar and comfortable. These may include favourite furniture, family photographs, comfortable bedding, and decorative items. Personal keepsakes, favourite books, and familiar artwork can also help create a comforting space. Bringing these treasured belongings can help create a sense of home and make the transition feel more personal. Sorting items into categories such as keep, donate, gift, or store makes the process more manageable. Involving other family members can also make downsizing feel more collaborative while preserving cherished family memories. A thoughtful approach can make downsizing a more positive experience for everyone. ## How can you Prepare for Moving Day? Moving day usually goes more smoothly when every detail has been organised beforehand. Confirm the move-in date with the assisted living community several weeks in advance. Coordinate movers if needed, label boxes clearly, and prepare a checklist for essential items. Prepare an easily accessible bag with essential items your parent may need during the move and first few days in their new home. Include daily medications, personal toiletries, comfortable clothing, and a mobile phone charger. Pack important documents, medical paperwork, favourite snacks, and essentials such as glasses or hearing aids. Keeping these essentials nearby helps ensure a smoother and more comfortable transition. Arriving early allows time to arrange furniture, decorate the apartment, and help create a welcoming environment before your parent begins settling in. Keeping the atmosphere calm and positive helps reduce unnecessary stress. ## How can Families Support Emotional Adjustment? Even when the move is the right decision, emotional adjustment takes time. Older adults may experience grief over leaving a longtime home while also feeling uncertain about unfamiliar surroundings. Family members can ease the transition by remaining patient and encouraging. Helpful approaches include: - Visiting regularly without overwhelming their loved ones - Encouraging participation in community activities - Introducing neighbours and staff members - Celebrating small milestones - Listening without dismissing concerns - Maintaining familiar routines whenever possible Building new friendships often becomes one of the greatest benefits of assisted living. Residents frequently discover opportunities for social engagement that were difficult to maintain while living alone. Adjustment looks different for every individual. Some residents settle in quickly, while others require several weeks before feeling fully comfortable. ## What Should you Expect During the First Few Weeks? The first month often involves learning new routines and building relationships. Staff members work closely with residents to understand their personal preferences and establish care routines. They also encourage [participation in activities](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) that match each resident’s individual interests. Families may notice gradual improvements in several areas after the transition to assisted living. These can include better nutrition, improved medication management, increased social interaction, and greater physical activity. Many families also experience reduced caregiver stress as their loved one receives consistent support and enjoys a more structured daily routine. Open communication between family members and community staff remains essential throughout the adjustment period. Sharing updates about routines, preferences, hobbies, and medical history helps caregivers provide more personalised support. It also ensures care plans can be adjusted as needs change, promoting greater comfort and continuity of care. ## Staying Connected and Planning Ahead for Assisted Living Moving into assisted living does not reduce the importance of family relationships. Regular visits, phone calls, shared meals, and community events help residents maintain strong connections with their loved ones. Families can stay involved by attending care conferences, celebrating special occasions, and encouraging hobbies. Keeping staff informed about changes in health, preferences, or routines helps provide personalised support. Planning ahead allows families to make confident decisions before a crisis occurs. It gives older adults time to explore options, organise important details, and adjust comfortably to their future home. ## How does Avery Heights Support a Smooth Transition Choosing an assisted living community involves more than finding a new residence. Families need guidance and compassionate support throughout the transition. Avery Heights helps simplify the process through personalised care planning, welcoming spaces, and experienced team members. Families can tour the community, ask questions, and learn how personalised support helps older adults enjoy an active lifestyle in Connecticut. Careful planning and open communication create a smoother experience for everyone involved. Although moving can feel challenging, assisted living can improve safety, comfort, and quality of life. With the right support from Avery Heights, families can begin a new chapter filled with connection, independence, and peace of mind. Explore Avery Heights today to learn more about personalised assisted living options and discover how your family can begin this transition with confidence. [Schedule a visit](https://averyheights.org/contact/) to see the welcoming community, meet the care team, and find the right support for your loved one’s next chapter. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### Can my parent personalise their assisted living apartment? Yes. Most assisted living communities encourage residents to bring their own furniture, family photos, artwork, and personal belongings to create a comfortable and familiar living space. ### How often can family members visit after the move? Family members can usually visit as often as they like during community visiting hours. Regular visits help residents stay connected and adjust more comfortably. ### What happens if my parent’s care needs increase over time? The care team will reassess your parent’s needs and update their care plan. Many assisted living communities can provide additional support without requiring a move. ### Can couples move into assisted living together? Yes. Many assisted living communities offer apartments for couples while providing each person with care based on their individual needs. ### Is assisted living only for people with significant health problems? No. Many older adults choose assisted living before major health issues develop so they can enjoy a safer home, social opportunities, and support with daily activities when needed. **Categories:** Assisted Living **Tags:** Assisted Living, Senior Living --- ### [How to Choose a CCRC for Aging Parents: A Connecticut Guide](https://averyheights.org/how-to-choose-a-ccrc-for-aging-parents-a-connecticut-guide/) **Published:** August 3, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Group of four adults walking along a campus path, looking at a'Campus Life Plan Pathways' info sign and holding brochures.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/08/How-to-Choose-a-CCRC-for-Aging-Parents-A-Connecticut-Guide-2048x1117.jpg "How to Choose a CCRC for Aging Parents- A Connecticut Guide - Avery Heights") Choosing the right senior living community is one of the most important decisions a family can make. Many adult children begin searching for options after noticing changes in a parent’s mobility, health, or ability to manage everyday responsibilities. Many families start planning early to ensure greater security and independence for the future. A Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC) or Life Plan Community provides a [long-term solution](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) with independent living and access to higher levels of care as needs change. Connecticut families often choose CCRCs for peace of mind, allowing residents to stay in the same community while receiving care as their needs change. Familiar surroundings, caregivers, and established friendships contribute to greater comfort during every stage of aging. Every CCRC has its own approach to healthcare, lifestyle, pricing, services, and resident experience. Understanding what to evaluate helps families make informed decisions that support both immediate needs and future goals. ## What is a CCRC? A Continuing Care Retirement Community is a [senior living community](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/) designed to provide multiple levels of care within one campus. Residents often begin in independent living while maintaining an active lifestyle. As health needs change, they can transition to [assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/), memory care, or skilled nursing without leaving the community. Unlike traditional retirement housing, a CCRC focuses on long-term planning. Residents gain access to healthcare services while continuing to enjoy social activities, wellness programs, dining options, and community events. Many people also refer to CCRCs as Life Plan Communities since they support aging across every stage of retirement. ## Why are CCRCs Popular in Connecticut? Connecticut’s aging population makes long-term senior care planning important for many families. Access to quality healthcare, family connections, and strong local communities often influence the choice of senior living. Many families prefer CCRCs for predictable future care, active lifestyles, and convenient access to multiple services. Communities near Hartford also provide easy access to hospitals, shopping, cultural attractions, and loved ones. These communities also encourage social engagement and overall well-being through [wellness programs](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/), recreational activities, and supportive services. This combination helps residents maintain a higher quality of life as they age. ## What Should you Consider before Choosing a CCRC? Choosing the right community involves much more than comparing prices. Every family should evaluate several important factors before making a final decision, including care options, lifestyle preferences, financial considerations, and overall quality of life. ### Evaluate Current and Future Care Needs A parent’s current health represents only one part of the decision. Future medical needs often become more important over time. A community offering a full continuum of care helps reduce future disruptions if health needs change. Families should consider whether their parent currently lives independently and if chronic health conditions are becoming harder to manage. They should also think about whether assistance with daily activities or [memory care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) may be needed in the future. ### Consider Lifestyle Preferences Healthcare matters, but quality of life is equally important. Residents spend their days participating in activities, building friendships, and enjoying their surroundings. A community should feel welcoming, engaging, and comfortable. Families should look for opportunities such as fitness classes, educational programs, volunteer activities, and creative arts. Social clubs, group outings, dining, and other activities also help create an active and enjoyable lifestyle. ### Review Healthcare Services Healthcare quality should remain one of the highest priorities when comparing CCRCs. Families should also ask how residents transition between levels of care and whether medical services are available on campus. Families should ask about services such as assisted living, skilled nursing, memory care, and [rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/). They should also inquire about medication management, emergency response, and wellness monitoring to ensure future care needs are met. ### Understand the Different Contract Types One area that surprises many families involves CCRC contracts. Each agreement has different financial structures and healthcare coverage, so understanding the terms helps families make informed decisions. Families should carefully review contract details, including fees, services, and future care coverage. Comparing options helps ensure the chosen community provides both financial value and long-term security. ### Extensive Care Contracts These contracts generally include future healthcare services for little or no increase beyond regular monthly fees. Initial entrance fees are often higher, but future healthcare costs become more predictable. Extensive care contracts can provide greater financial predictability by reducing uncertainty about future healthcare expenses. Families should review the terms carefully to understand what services are included and how costs may change over time. ### Modified Contracts Modified agreements provide a limited amount of healthcare services before additional fees begin. These contracts may offer a balance between upfront costs and future care coverage, depending on the resident’s needs. Families should carefully review what healthcare services are included and when additional charges may apply. Understanding these details helps residents and families plan for future expenses while choosing the right level of care. ### Fee for Service Contracts Residents pay lower entrance fees initially but pay market rates if higher levels of care become necessary. Understanding these differences helps families compare long-term value instead of focusing only on initial costs. Fee-for-service contracts can provide flexibility for residents who want lower upfront costs. However, families should consider potential future healthcare expenses and evaluate whether this option aligns with their long-term financial plans. ## How do Financial Planning and Community Culture Influence your CCRC Choice? Financial planning plays a major role when selecting a CCRC. Most communities require an entrance fee and ongoing monthly payments, with costs varying based on apartment size, contract type, available services, and healthcare coverage. Families should review entrance fees, monthly service fees, healthcare costs, and refund policies. They should also consider the community’s financial stability, annual fee increases, and long-term affordability before making a decision. Community culture is equally important because every CCRC has its own personality. Some communities emphasize lifelong learning and cultural activities, while others focus more on wellness or faith-based living. Visiting several communities helps families determine whether residents feel engaged, connected, and comfortable. During each visit, families should observe resident interactions, staff friendliness, [dining atmosphere](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/dining/), and activity participation. They should also evaluate cleanliness, safety, outdoor spaces, and the overall energy of the community. Evaluating both financial considerations and community culture helps families choose a CCRC that supports long-term security and a fulfilling lifestyle. ## What Questions Should Families Ask During a Tour? Tours provide an opportunity to evaluate both services and daily life. Helpful questions include what healthcare services are available on campus, the average wait time for higher levels of care, and how emergencies are handled. Families should also ask about resident interactions with healthcare staff and the available dining and transportation options. It is also important to understand security measures, family involvement in care planning, and any planned renovations or future improvements. Taking notes and comparing answers from different communities can make the decision process easier. A thorough tour helps families identify the community that best matches their loved one’s current needs and future expectations. ## Why is Location Important? [Location](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/) affects both convenience and quality of life. Many Connecticut families prefer communities close to children, healthcare providers, and familiar neighborhoods. A convenient location helps residents maintain connections and enjoy a more comfortable transition. Living near family encourages regular visits, strengthens relationships, and makes participation in healthcare decisions easier. A central Connecticut location may provide convenient access to major hospitals, shopping centers, restaurants, religious organizations, and community events. Remaining connected to familiar surroundings and nearby amenities often helps residents adjust more comfortably and maintain an active lifestyle. It also allows them to continue enjoying meaningful relationships, community connections, and familiar routines. ## How Can Families Identify a High-Quality CCRC? Experienced, compassionate staff play a vital role in resident satisfaction by creating a supportive environment where older adults feel valued, comfortable, and well cared for. Families should also ask about nurse availability, communication practices, and staffing consistency. A high-quality CCRC offers more than healthcare. It provides a safe, welcoming environment that promotes independence while ensuring additional care is available whenever residents’ needs change. Strong communities are known for financial stability, experienced leadership, quality healthcare, [engaging activities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/program-and-activities/), personalized support, and clear communication. Choosing a community with these qualities gives residents and families greater confidence and long-term peace of mind. ## Why Choose Avery Heights and Make an Informed Decision? Families searching for a CCRC in Connecticut often look for personalized care, an engaging lifestyle, and long-term security. [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/) offers a Life Plan Community with a full continuum of care, allowing residents to remain in familiar surroundings as their needs change. Wellness programs, enriching activities, quality dining, compassionate caregivers, and thoughtfully designed living spaces help residents live with purpose and confidence. These features also encourage independence and enhance overall quality of life throughout retirement. Choosing a CCRC should never feel rushed. Visiting communities, reviewing contracts, and evaluating healthcare, finances, and quality of life help families [make a confident decision](https://averyheights.org/contact/) while planning for future care needs. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### 1. Can a couple move into a CCRC if only one person needs care? Yes. Many CCRCs allow couples to live together even if only one spouse requires assisted living or healthcare services. This enables couples to remain close while each receives the appropriate level of support. ### 2. What happens if my care needs change after I move into a CCRC? One of the primary benefits of a CCRC is the ability to transition between levels of care as your needs evolve. Residents can often move from independent living to assisted living, memory care, or skilled nursing without leaving the community. ### 3. How long does the CCRC decision process usually take? The timeline varies by family, but many people spend several weeks or months researching communities, touring campuses, reviewing contracts, and discussing financial planning before making a decision. Starting early provides more options and reduces pressure. ### 4. Are family members involved after someone moves into a CCRC? Yes. Most CCRCs encourage ongoing family involvement through regular visits, care planning meetings, community events, and communication with staff. Staying engaged helps families remain connected throughout their loved one’s retirement journey. ### 5. Can I tour a CCRC before deciding? Absolutely. Touring a community is one of the best ways to evaluate its atmosphere, amenities, healthcare services, and resident experience. Visiting in person also gives families the opportunity to ask questions and determine whether the community is the right fit. **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning, Healthy Aging & Wellness **Tags:** CCRC --- ### [Proven Short-Term Rehab Hartford CT Seniors Trust](https://averyheights.org/proven-short-term-rehab-hartford-ct-seniors-trust/) **Published:** May 21, 2026 **Author:** avery heights **Content:** ![Proven Short-Term Rehab Hartford CT Seniors Trust Edit](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Proven-Short-Term-Rehab-Hartford-CT-Seniors-Trust-Edit-1024x559.jpg "Proven Short-Term Rehab Hartford CT Seniors Trust Edit - Avery Heights")Recovering from surgery is rarely a simple process, especially for older adults. Even after a successful hospital stay, many seniors need additional support before they can safely return home. At Avery Heights, we offer Proven Short-Term Rehab Hartford CT Seniors Trust. Strength, mobility, balance, endurance, and confidence often take time to rebuild. That is why families frequently search for short-term rehab Hartford CT options that provide both clinical expertise and compassionate care during recovery. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), short-term rehabilitation is designed to help older adults regain independence after surgery while receiving personalized care in a comfortable senior living environment. Whether someone is recovering from a joint replacement, cardiac procedure, stroke, fracture, or another major medical event, rehabilitation focuses on helping residents heal safely and return to daily life with greater confidence. For families navigating discharge planning from hospitals, understanding what happens during short-term rehabilitation can make the transition less overwhelming. Knowing what to expect also helps families feel more confident when choosing the right rehabilitation setting for a loved one. ## What is Short-Term Rehabilitation? [Short-term rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/) is a temporary stay focused on recovery after surgery, illness, injury, or hospitalization. The goal is to help seniors regain strength, mobility, and independence so they can safely transition back home or to their prior living arrangement. Unlike long-term nursing care, short-term rehab is highly goal-oriented. Care plans are built around measurable progress, including improving walking ability, rebuilding endurance, managing pain, and safely completing everyday tasks such as dressing, bathing, and preparing meals. For seniors, recovery after surgery can be more complex because aging bodies often heal more slowly. A supportive rehabilitation environment helps reduce the risk of falls, medication complications, infections, and hospital readmissions. This is one reason why post-surgery rehabilitation senior living communities continue to play an important role in senior healthcare. At Avery Heights, rehabilitation combines skilled nursing support with therapy services tailored to each resident’s condition and recovery goals. ## Who Benefits from Short-Term Rehabilitation? Many older adults benefit from rehabilitation following hospitalization. Common reasons for entering a short-term rehab program include hip replacement surgery, knee replacement surgery, cardiac surgery, stroke recovery, fracture rehabilitation, spinal procedures, pneumonia or respiratory illness recovery, and general deconditioning after hospitalization. Even seniors who were previously active may experience weakness and fatigue after surgery. Tasks that once felt routine can suddenly become physically demanding. Rehabilitation bridges the gap between hospital care and independent living by helping seniors safely rebuild their abilities step by step. Families are often surprised to learn how much recovery support is needed after discharge. Hospital stays are typically shorter than they once were, which means patients often leave the hospital before they are fully ready to manage daily life independently. Rehabilitation provides continued monitoring and therapy during this critical phase of healing. ## What Happens after Hospital Discharge? The transition from hospital to rehabilitation usually begins before discharge. Hospital care teams coordinate with rehabilitation providers to ensure continuity of care and safe recovery planning. Once a resident arrives at Avery Heights, the rehabilitation team conducts a comprehensive assessment that may include mobility evaluation, pain management review, medication assessment, nutritional evaluation, cognitive screening, fall risk analysis, and therapy planning. This assessment helps create an individualized recovery plan based on the resident’s medical needs, personal goals, and physician recommendations. For example, someone recovering from knee replacement surgery may focus heavily on physical therapy and walking endurance. A resident recovering from cardiac surgery may need a more gradual therapy schedule with close monitoring of stamina and vital signs. Recovery plans are never one-size-fits-all because every surgery and every patient experience is different. ## Physical Therapy after Surgery Physical therapy is often one of the most important components of short-term rehabilitation. The primary goal is to restore movement, strength, flexibility, and balance while reducing pain and preventing complications. Therapists work closely with residents to improve mobility in a safe and structured way. Therapy sessions may include walking exercises, balance training, stair navigation, strength-building exercises, range-of-motion therapy, and transfer training for getting in and out of bed or chairs. For many seniors, the emotional side of recovery matters just as much as the physical aspect. Fear of falling or reinjury can slow progress. Skilled therapists help residents rebuild confidence while encouraging steady improvement at a pace appropriate for their condition. At Avery Heights, therapy programs are designed to support both recovery and independence, helping residents regain the skills they need for daily life. ## Occupational Therapy and Everyday Independence Recovery is not only about walking again. Seniors also need to regain the ability to perform routine activities safely and comfortably. Occupational therapy focuses on practical daily tasks that support independent living. Depending on the resident’s needs, therapy may address: - Bathing and grooming - Dressing independently - Meal preparation - Safe bathroom use - Energy conservation techniques - Adaptive equipment training Occupational therapists often recommend strategies or tools that make daily life easier during recovery. These adjustments can significantly reduce frustration and improve safety after discharge. For families, occupational therapy also provides valuable guidance on how to prepare the home environment for a safer transition after rehabilitation ends. ## Skilled Nursing Support During Recovery Therapy alone is not enough for many post-surgical patients. Seniors recovering from surgery often require ongoing medical oversight and nursing care during rehabilitation. Skilled nursing services may include medication management, wound care, pain management, monitoring vital signs, managing chronic conditions, coordinating physician care, and preventing complications. Pain management is especially important during rehabilitation. Proper pain control allows residents to participate more fully in therapy while supporting healing and comfort. At Avery Heights, the rehabilitation experience combines clinical care with a supportive senior living environment that helps residents feel more comfortable during recovery. ## Nutrition and Recovery Healing after surgery requires proper nutrition. Older adults recovering from illness or surgery may experience reduced appetite, fatigue, or dietary restrictions that affect recovery speed. Nutritional support during rehabilitation helps residents maintain energy and support tissue healing. Balanced meals, hydration, and dietary monitoring all contribute to better recovery outcomes. Protein intake is particularly important after surgery because it helps support muscle repair and strength rebuilding. Nutritional teams often work alongside nursing staff and therapists to ensure recovery plans address the whole person rather than focusing only on mobility. ## Emotional Recovery Matters Too Surgery and hospitalization can be emotionally difficult experiences for seniors. Temporary loss of independence, pain, fatigue, and uncertainty about recovery can create anxiety or discouragement. A supportive rehabilitation setting can make a major difference in emotional well-being. Social interaction, compassionate staff, encouragement from therapists, and a calm environment all contribute to a healthier recovery experience. Families also benefit from reassurance and communication during rehabilitation. Knowing a loved one is receiving attentive care often reduces stress during what can otherwise feel like an overwhelming period. At Avery Heights, rehabilitation emphasizes dignity, comfort, and individualized support throughout the recovery process. ## How Long Does Short-Term Rehab Last? One of the most common questions families ask is how long rehabilitation will take. The answer depends on several factors, including the type of surgery, overall health, mobility before hospitalization, and progress during therapy. Some seniors may stay for only a few weeks, while others require longer rehabilitation periods. In general, short-term rehab may last anywhere from several days to several weeks. Recovery timelines vary because every patient heals differently. A relatively healthy senior recovering from joint replacement surgery may progress quickly, while someone managing multiple medical conditions may need additional support. The rehabilitation team regularly evaluates progress and adjusts care plans as recovery continues. ## Does Medicare Cover Short-Term Rehab? Another important concern for families is cost. In many cases, Medicare may cover short-term rehabilitation services when certain conditions are met. Typically, coverage may apply if: - The patient had a qualifying hospital stay - A physician recommends skilled rehabilitation care - Skilled nursing or therapy services are medically necessary Coverage details can vary depending on insurance plans, length of stay, and specific medical needs. Families are encouraged to review Medicare guidelines and speak directly with admissions or care coordinators to better understand eligibility and benefits. Understanding financial coverage early in the discharge planning process can help families make more informed rehabilitation decisions. ## Why Families Choose Avery Heights for Rehabilitation? When evaluating short-term rehab Hartford CT options, families often look for more than therapy services alone. They want reassurance that their loved one will receive attentive care in a welcoming environment focused on recovery and dignity. Avery Heights offers several advantages that families value during post-surgical recovery: ### Personalized Care Planning Every rehabilitation plan is tailored to the resident’s condition, recovery goals, and physician recommendations. Individualized care helps residents progress safely while receiving support appropriate to their needs. ### Convenient Hartford-Area Location Proximity matters during rehabilitation because families often visit frequently throughout recovery. Being near major Hartford healthcare providers helps support smoother care coordination and easier transitions from hospital to rehab. ### Focus on Senior Recovery Older adults face unique recovery challenges after surgery. Rehabilitation programs designed specifically for seniors can better address mobility concerns, chronic conditions, and age-related recovery needs. ### Comfortable Recovery Environment Healing is easier in a supportive and comfortable setting. Residents benefit from compassionate care, social interaction, and an environment designed to promote wellness and recovery. ### Coordinated Therapy and Nursing Care Successful rehabilitation requires collaboration between therapists, nurses, physicians, and support staff. Integrated care teams help ensure residents receive consistent support throughout recovery. ## Preparing for a Successful Rehabilitation Stay Families can help make rehabilitation more successful by planning ahead before admission. Understanding the rehabilitation process in advance can help reduce stress and make the transition from hospital to rehab smoother for both seniors and their loved ones. Open communication with the care team also helps families stay informed about recovery goals, progress, and discharge planning throughout the stay. Helpful preparation steps include: - Bringing comfortable clothing and supportive footwear - Preparing a list of medications - Discussing recovery goals with the care team - Staying involved in care planning discussions - Asking questions about discharge expectations Family encouragement often plays an important role in motivation and emotional well-being during rehabilitation. It is also helpful for families to understand that progress may happen gradually. Some days will feel easier than others, and recovery timelines can shift depending on health status and healing progress. ## Transitioning Home after Rehabilitation The ultimate goal of short-term rehabilitation is to help seniors return home or transition safely to their preferred living environment. Before discharge, the care team may provide guidance on home safety modifications, mobility equipment, follow-up therapy, medication management, and ongoing support services to help ensure a safer and smoother transition back home after rehabilitation. These recommendations help reduce the risk of falls, complications, or hospital readmission after rehabilitation ends. Families often feel more prepared and confident when discharge planning begins early and includes clear communication from the rehabilitation team. ## Choosing the Right Rehabilitation Community Selecting a rehabilitation provider is an important healthcare decision. Families should look beyond marketing materials and ask detailed questions about therapy services, nursing care, staffing, communication practices, and recovery planning. When touring or researching [rehabilitation communities](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/), families may want to ask: - How often are therapy sessions provided? - How are care plans individualized? - What is the staff-to-resident approach? - How are families updated on progress? - What support is available after discharge? The right rehabilitation environment should combine clinical expertise with compassion, communication, and respect for each resident’s recovery journey. ## Supporting Recovery With Compassion and Expertise Recovering from surgery can feel physically and emotionally demanding for seniors and their families. The right rehabilitation setting provides more than medical care alone. It offers encouragement, structure, safety, and personalized support during an important stage of healing. For families searching for post-surgery rehabilitation senior living options in the [Hartford area](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/), Avery Heights provides short-term rehabilitation focused on helping residents regain strength, rebuild independence, and move forward with confidence. Whether recovery involves orthopedic surgery, cardiac care, illness recovery, or another medical event, compassionate [rehabilitation support](https://averyheights.org/contact/) can make the transition from hospital to home smoother and safer. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### How long does short-term rehab last after surgery? Short-term rehabilitation may last anywhere from several days to several weeks, depending on the surgery, overall health, therapy progress, and physician recommendations. Recovery timelines vary for each individual. ### Does Medicare cover short-term rehab? Medicare may cover short-term rehabilitation when medically necessary skilled nursing or therapy services are required after a qualifying hospital stay. Coverage details depend on the individual’s plan and medical needs. ### What is the difference between short-term rehab and long-term care? Short-term rehabilitation focuses on temporary recovery and therapy after surgery, illness, or hospitalization. Long-term care provides ongoing assistance for individuals who need extended support with daily living or medical care. ### What therapies are included in short-term rehabilitation? Short-term rehabilitation commonly includes physical therapy, occupational therapy, skilled nursing care, medication management, and recovery support tailored to the resident’s condition. ### Can family members visit during rehabilitation? In most cases, family involvement is encouraged because emotional support and participation in care planning can positively impact recovery and transition planning. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [The Real Cost of Senior Living in Hartford: No Buy-In vs. Entrance Fee Communities](https://averyheights.org/the-real-cost-of-senior-living-in-hartford-no-buy-in-vs-entrance-fee-communities/) **Published:** June 2, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Three adults sit at a table reviewing colorful brochures while a laptop is open, suggesting a planning meeting at home or office.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/06/The-Real-Cost-of-Senior-Living-in-Hartford-No-Buy-In-vs-Entrance-Fee-Communities.jpg "The Real Cost of Senior Living in Hartford- No Buy-In vs Entrance Fee Communities - Avery Heights") Choosing a senior living community is one of the most important financial and lifestyle decisions a family can make. In the Hartford area, many older adults begin their search assuming all retirement communities work the same way. What often surprises them is how dramatically pricing structures can differ between communities that require a large entrance fee and those that operate on a rental model with no buy-in. For many Connecticut families, the biggest question is “How can we protect our savings while still receiving excellent care, comfort, and long-term support?” Understanding the difference between entrance fee communities and no buy-in senior living communities can help families make a more confident and financially sustainable decision. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), residents benefit from a rental-based model that provides flexibility without requiring a substantial upfront investment. For many seniors and adult children, that difference changes everything. ## Understanding the Cost of Senior Living in Hartford CT The cost of senior living in Hartford CT depends on several factors, including the level of care, apartment size, amenities, [healthcare support](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/), and financial structure of the community itself. In Connecticut, senior living costs are often higher than the national average because of regional healthcare costs, property values, and demand for quality retirement communities. Families researching options typically encounter three broad categories: [Independent living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) communities, Assisted living communities, and Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRCs). Some communities operate entirely on a monthly rental basis. Others require a substantial entrance fee in addition to monthly service costs. The entrance fee may range from tens of thousands to several hundred thousand dollars, depending on the contract type and residence selected. At first glance, two communities may appear similar in terms of [amenities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/), dining, wellness programs, and care options. The financial commitments behind them, however, can look very different once families begin reviewing contracts and [long-term](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) obligations. ## What is a Senior Living Entrance Fee in Connecticut? A senior living entrance fee in Connecticut is an upfront payment required by certain retirement communities before a resident moves in. These communities are commonly structured as CCRCs or Life Plan Communities. Entrance fees are often marketed as a way to secure future care access and stabilize monthly costs over time. Depending on the contract, a portion of the fee may be partially refundable to the resident or their estate. In other cases, much of the payment is non-refundable. The size of these fees can vary significantly. In Connecticut, entrance fees may range from approximately $100,000 to well over $500,000, depending on: - Apartment type and square footage - Location and demand - Care guarantees are included in the contract - Refund structure - Community prestige and amenities Monthly fees are typically still required after the entrance payment is made. Those recurring costs can increase annually based on operational expenses and healthcare needs. While entrance fee communities may work well for some households, families should carefully examine the long-term financial implications before committing such a significant amount of capital. ## Why are Many Families Rethinking Large Buy-In Models? For previous generations, entrance fee communities were often viewed as the gold standard of retirement living. Today, many seniors are approaching retirement with different financial priorities. Adult children helping parents evaluate senior living options are increasingly concerned about preserving assets, maintaining flexibility, and avoiding unnecessary financial risk. Economic uncertainty, rising healthcare costs, and longer life expectancy have all influenced how families think about retirement planning. Several common concerns arise when discussing entrance fee communities. These include: ### The Upfront Financial Commitment Can Be Overwhelming Paying hundreds of thousands of dollars up front can significantly reduce retirement liquidity. Many families are uncomfortable tying up such a large portion of their savings in a single housing decision. Even when a portion of the entrance fee is refundable, refunds may depend on future occupancy rates, resale timing, or specific contract terms. For seniors who want to preserve financial flexibility, the commitment can feel restrictive. ### Health Needs Can Change Unexpectedly Retirement planning rarely unfolds exactly as expected. A senior may initially move into independent living but later decide to relocate closer to family or seek a different level of care elsewhere. In those situations, recovering an entrance fee may not always happen quickly or fully. Some contracts include waiting periods or refund limitations that families do not fully understand until after move-in. ### Families Want More Predictable Budgeting Modern retirees often prefer straightforward financial structures. A monthly rental model can feel easier to understand and manage compared to contracts involving entrance fees, refund schedules, and future healthcare provisions. Transparent pricing provides peace of mind, especially for adult children helping parents navigate complex financial decisions. ## What is a No Buy-In Senior Living Community? A no-buy-in senior living community operates more like a traditional rental arrangement. Instead of requiring a large entrance payment, residents pay a monthly fee for housing, amenities, services, and care support. At Avery Heights, residents can enjoy the benefits of a [supportive senior living environment](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/) without needing to commit a substantial lump sum upfront. This approach appeals to seniors who want: - Greater financial flexibility - Easier transitions into senior living - Access to services without major asset liquidation - Predictable monthly expenses - The ability to preserve estate assets for loved ones For many families, the rental model reduces stress during an already emotional transition. Rather than focusing on complicated financial structures, residents can focus on building community, enjoying daily life, and accessing the support they need. ## Comparing Entrance Fee Communities and Rental Communities Understanding the practical differences between fee and rental community models can help families evaluate which option better aligns with their goals. The comparison can be summed up as: ### Upfront Costs Entrance fee communities require a significant initial payment that can reach several hundred thousand dollars. Rental communities like Avery Heights do not require a large buy-in. Residents typically pay a monthly fee and standard move-in costs. ### Financial Flexibility Entrance fee models may reduce available retirement liquidity because a large portion of assets becomes tied to the community contract. Rental communities allow residents to maintain more control over their savings and investments. ### Estate Preservation Large entrance fees may impact inheritance planning and estate preservation strategies. A no buy-in structure can make it easier for families to preserve financial resources for spouses, children, or future healthcare needs. ### Ease of Transition Many seniors delay moving into supportive living because they are intimidated by complex contracts and financial commitments. Rental communities often provide a simpler transition process that feels less overwhelming. Families often find that the move-in process is quicker and less stressful, with fewer financial decisions required upfront. This allows seniors to focus more on settling into their new lifestyle rather than navigating paperwork and long-term contract concerns. ### Long-Term Planning Some entrance fee communities include future healthcare guarantees that appeal to certain retirees seeking predictability. Rental communities can still offer supportive care and [lifestyle](https://averyheights.org/wellness/) benefits while avoiding substantial upfront commitments. The right choice depends on each family’s financial priorities, health outlook, and comfort level. ## The Hidden Costs Families Sometimes Overlook When comparing communities, families often focus only on the advertised monthly fee or entrance payment. However, the true cost of senior living includes several additional considerations. ### Home Maintenance Expenses Remaining at home may initially appear less expensive than moving into senior living. In reality, many older adults face rising costs associated with property taxes, home repairs, yard maintenance, utilities, snow removal, transportation, and in-home caregiving services. These expenses can quickly add up, especially when healthcare support becomes necessary. ### Social Isolation and Health Impacts Isolation can affect both emotional and physical well-being. Seniors living alone may experience increased loneliness, reduced activity levels, and greater healthcare risks over time. Communities that provide social engagement, wellness programs, dining services, and daily interaction can improve overall quality of life in ways that are difficult to measure financially. ### Future Care Coordination Families caring for aging parents often underestimate the emotional and logistical demands of coordinating healthcare, transportation, meals, and safety support. Senior living communities can reduce caregiver stress while ensuring residents receive consistent assistance in a supportive environment. ## Why are Hartford Families Exploring Rental-Based Senior Living? Across Hartford and surrounding Connecticut communities, many families are shifting toward rental-based senior living because it aligns better with modern retirement expectations. Today’s retirees value flexibility. They want options that allow them to maintain independence while still accessing support when needed. They also want transparency. The idea of avoiding a six-figure entrance fee is especially appealing for seniors who would rather keep their savings accessible for travel, healthcare, [family support](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/), or future planning. For adult children helping parents make decisions, rental communities can also simplify conversations about finances and estate planning. Instead of navigating complicated refund structures and long-term contractual obligations, families can focus on what matters most: safety, comfort, community, personalized care, and long-term quality of life. ## How Avery Heights Supports Financial Peace of Mind? At Avery Heights, the goal is to provide seniors with an engaging, supportive lifestyle while reducing unnecessary financial pressure. The community’s rental model offers an alternative to large entrance fee structures that may feel financially burdensome or restrictive. Residents and families appreciate several important advantages, such as: ### Greater Accessibility Without a massive upfront payment, senior living becomes more attainable for many households. Families can explore supportive living without needing to liquidate large portions of retirement savings immediately. This opens the door for more families to consider senior living at the right time, rather than delaying due to financial pressure. It also helps preserve savings for future healthcare needs, travel, or legacy planning. ### Simplified Financial Planning A straightforward monthly pricing structure can make budgeting easier and reduce confusion during the decision-making process. Families often feel more confident when they fully understand what services and amenities are included. This predictability helps families avoid unexpected financial surprises that can arise with complex contract-based models. It also makes long-term planning more stable, especially when managing retirement income and healthcare expenses. ### Flexibility for Changing Needs Life circumstances can evolve. A rental model allows residents to maintain greater adaptability as healthcare needs, family situations, or financial priorities change over time. This flexibility is especially valuable for seniors whose health conditions may progress or improve over time, allowing care levels to adjust without financial restructuring. It also provides peace of mind for families who want assurance that future changes can be managed smoothly and without unnecessary disruption. ### Focus on Lifestyle and Care Rather than centering the conversation on contracts and entrance fees, Avery Heights emphasizes resident experience, wellness, social connection, and personalized support. This shift in focus often helps families feel more comfortable during the transition into senior living. Residents are able to spend more time engaging in meaningful daily activities rather than worrying about financial complexities or long-term contractual details. This creates a more positive and supportive environment where overall well-being and quality of life remain the main priority. ## Questions Families Should Ask Before Choosing a Community Before making a final decision, families should ask detailed questions about both immediate costs and long-term financial obligations. Important questions include: - Is there an entrance fee or buy-in requirement? - What portion of the fee is refundable? - Are monthly fees fixed or subject to annual increases? - What services are included in monthly pricing? - How are future care needs handled? - What happens financially if a resident moves out? - Are there additional healthcare or support costs? - How does the contract affect estate planning? Taking time to compare financial structures carefully can prevent unexpected surprises later. There is no universal answer when comparing entrance fee communities and rental-based senior living. The best choice depends on each family’s financial goals, healthcare expectations, and lifestyle preferences. Some retirees may value the long-term care guarantees associated with entrance fee communities. Others may prioritize flexibility, liquidity, and simplified financial planning. For many Hartford-area families, avoiding a large upfront buy-in provides greater peace of mind. A rental model allows seniors to enjoy community living, support services, and meaningful daily experiences without committing hundreds of thousands of dollars upfront. At Avery Heights, that balance between flexibility and support is central to the resident experience. ## Final Thoughts on the Cost of Senior Living Hartford CT Researching the cost of senior living Hartford CT families can realistically afford requires looking beyond marketing brochures and headline pricing. The difference between a rental-based community and an entrance fee community can have a lasting impact on retirement savings, estate planning, and long-term financial confidence. As more families explore alternatives to traditional buy-in models, no-entrance-fee senior living communities are becoming increasingly attractive. They offer a practical path toward supportive living while helping residents maintain greater control over their financial future. For seniors seeking comfort, connection, and care without the burden of a large upfront investment, Avery Heights provides an [option](https://averyheights.org/contact/) designed around flexibility and peace of mind. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### What is the average cost of senior living in Hartford CT? The cost of senior living in Hartford CT varies depending on care level, apartment type, amenities, and community structure. Independent living generally costs less than assisted living or memory care, while entrance fee communities may require substantial upfront payments in addition to monthly fees. ### What is a senior living entrance fee in Connecticut? A senior living entrance fee in Connecticut is a large upfront payment required by some retirement communities before move-in. These fees may range from tens of thousands to several hundred thousand dollars, depending on the contract and residence selected. ### Are entrance fees refundable? Some communities offer partially refundable entrance fee contracts, while others provide limited or non-refundable arrangements. Families should carefully review refund terms and timelines before signing any agreement. ### What are the benefits of a no-buy-in senior living community? No buy-in communities provide greater financial flexibility because residents are not required to make a substantial upfront payment. Many families prefer rental-based models because they simplify budgeting and preserve retirement savings. ### Is rental-based senior living more affordable long term? Affordability depends on individual circumstances, care needs, and length of stay. However, many families appreciate the lower upfront financial burden and increased flexibility associated with rental-based senior living. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Assisted Living vs. Skilled Nursing: What's the Difference?](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-vs-skilled-nursing-whats-the-difference/) **Published:** July 27, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Assisted Living vs Skilled Nursing Whats the Difference](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/Assisted-Living-vs-Skilled-Nursing-Whats-the-Difference.jpg "Assisted Living vs Skilled Nursing-Whats the Difference - Avery Heights") Choosing the right level of care for an aging loved one can feel overwhelming. Families often face unfamiliar terminology while trying to make an important decision during an emotional time. Two of the most commonly misunderstood options are assisted living and skilled nursing. Although both provide support for older adults, they serve different needs and offer different levels of care. Understanding the difference between assisted living and skilled nursing helps families make confident decisions based on health needs and independence. It also allows them to choose the option that best supports their lifestyle preferences and long-term goals. Selecting the right community can improve quality of life, promote safety, and provide peace of mind for everyone involved. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), families often begin their search with one simple question. Which option is right for my loved one? The answer depends on medical needs, daily routines, and the level of assistance required. Learning how each option works makes it easier to identify the best fit. ## What is Assisted Living? [Assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) is designed for older adults who remain largely independent but benefit from support with certain daily activities. Residents live in private or semi-private apartments with access to dining, wellness programs, social activities, and community amenities. The goal is to assist whenever needed while preserving each resident’s independence and sense of autonomy. Residents receive personalized support with everyday tasks such as bathing, dressing, and grooming. Staff can also provide medication reminders or medication management to help residents follow their care plans. Housekeeping, laundry services, and nutritious daily meals further simplify daily life, allowing residents to focus on their well-being. Many assisted living communities also offer transportation to medical appointments, [wellness and fitness programs](https://averyheights.org/wellness/), social events, and recreational activities. Residents typically manage many aspects of daily life on their own while receiving assistance where necessary. These communities encourage physical health, cognitive engagement, and meaningful social connections in a safe and supportive environment. This balance of independence and personalized care helps residents enjoy a comfortable, active, and fulfilling lifestyle. ## What is Skilled Nursing? [Skilled nursing](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) provides a higher level of medical care for individuals with significant health needs. Licensed nurses are available around the clock, while healthcare professionals work closely with physicians to monitor health conditions and provide specialized treatments. Many people transition to skilled nursing after hospitalization, surgery, a serious illness, or an injury. Skilled nursing offers comprehensive medical care tailored to individuals with complex health conditions. Residents receive continuous nursing supervision along with physical, occupational, and speech therapy to support recovery and improve daily functioning. Specialized services are provided based on each person’s medical needs and treatment plan. Residents may also receive wound care, intravenous medications, pain management, and complex medication administration. Skilled nursing teams coordinate with physicians to monitor progress and adjust care as needed. Unlike assisted living, skilled nursing focuses primarily on medical treatment, rehabilitation, and continuous clinical supervision rather than independent living. This level of personalized care helps promote recovery, manage ongoing health conditions, and improve overall quality of life. ## What is the Difference Between Assisted Living and Skilled Nursing? Although both care options support older adults, the primary distinction lies in the level of medical care provided. Here is a comparison between assisted living and skilled nursing: **Assisted Living****Skilled Nursing**Supports independent livingProvides continuous medical careAssistance with daily activitiesTreatment for complex medical conditionsPrivate apartment-style livingClinical care environmentSocial lifestyle and wellness focusMedical recovery and rehabilitation focusCare staff available dailyLicensed nurses are available 24 hours a dayBest for long-term supportive livingBest for short-term rehabilitation or advanced medical needsFamilies sometimes assume skilled nursing is automatically the next step after assisted living. In reality, many older adults enjoy years of successful living in assisted living communities without ever requiring skilled nursing services. ## Who Benefits from Assisted Living or Skilled Nursing? Many older adults benefit from assisted living before health concerns become severe, allowing them to maintain greater independence while receiving support with daily activities. It is ideal for individuals who need help with dressing, bathing, meal preparation, or medications. However, they do not require continuous medical supervision and can still maintain a level of independence. Early planning also helps residents adjust comfortably and become part of an active community. Skilled nursing is designed for individuals whose medical needs go beyond what assisted living can safely provide. It is often recommended for those recovering from major surgery, a stroke, serious illness, or injury. It is also suitable for people who require intensive rehabilitation, frequent medical assessments, or ongoing nursing supervision. Medical professionals typically recommend the most appropriate level of care after evaluating a person’s health, mobility, and recovery needs. Choosing the right option ensures seniors receive the support and medical attention they need while promoting their safety, comfort, and overall quality of life. It also provides families with greater peace of mind, knowing their loved ones are receiving the appropriate level of care. ## How do Lifestyle and Costs Compare? Lifestyle and cost are two important factors when comparing assisted living and skilled nursing. Assisted living focuses on independence, personal choice, and social engagement. Residents can enjoy fitness classes, group outings, art programs, and restaurant-style[ dining](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/dining/). In contrast, skilled nursing emphasizes medical treatment, rehabilitation, and continuous clinical care. Daily life in assisted living encourages residents to remain active while receiving support with everyday tasks. Skilled nursing follows a more structured schedule centered on physician visits, nursing care, therapy sessions, medication administration, and recovery. Although recreational activities are available, medical care remains the primary focus. Costs vary based on location, services, apartment size, and the level of care required. Assisted living typically includes housing, meals, housekeeping, activities, and personal care. Skilled nursing costs more because it provides 24-hour medical care and specialized treatments. Families should also consider insurance coverage and payment options when planning for long-term care. Understanding the financial aspects in advance can help families make more informed and confident decisions. ## Can Someone Move from Assisted Living to Skilled Nursing? Yes. Health needs naturally change over time, and many older adults eventually require additional medical support. A resident living in assisted living may temporarily move to skilled nursing after surgery or hospitalization for rehabilitation. After recovering, many individuals return to assisted living and resume their previous lifestyle. Others may permanently transition to skilled nursing if medical conditions become more complex. Communities that offer multiple levels of care can make these transitions smoother by providing continuity and familiar surroundings whenever possible. This flexibility helps ensure residents continue receiving the appropriate level of care as their needs change over time. ## What Questions Should Families Ask Before Choosing? Making an informed decision involves more than comparing services. Families should ask thoughtful questions about daily life, medical care, and future planning. Important questions include: - What level of assistance does my loved one currently need? - Has a physician recommended rehabilitation or skilled nursing? - Can my loved one safely manage medications? - How important are social activities and community engagement? - What medical conditions may require future care? - What services are included in the monthly cost? - How are emergencies handled? - Can care needs increase without requiring another move? Having open conversations with healthcare providers and senior living professionals helps families evaluate both current and future needs. This guidance can make it easier to choose a care option that supports long-term health, safety, and well-being. ## Why do Early Planning and the Right Support Matter? [Choosing the right level of care](https://averyheights.org/contact/) early gives families more time to compare communities, understand available options, and involve loved ones in the decision-making process. It also helps reduce stress and allows seniors to adjust comfortably before a medical crisis occurs. At Avery Heights, every family’s journey is unique. The team works closely with residents and their families to understand their health needs, lifestyle, and long-term goals. Personalized guidance helps determine the most appropriate level of care while supporting changing needs over time. Understanding the differences between assisted living and skilled nursing helps families make informed decisions with confidence. By planning ahead and [selecting the right care option](https://averyheights.org/health-services/), seniors can enjoy greater safety, comfort, independence, and an improved quality of life. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### What is the main difference between assisted living and skilled nursing? Assisted living provides support with daily activities while encouraging independence. Skilled nursing delivers continuous medical care, rehabilitation, and treatment for complex health conditions. ### Can someone move from assisted living to skilled nursing later? Yes. Many older adults transition temporarily or permanently to skilled nursing if their medical needs increase or after hospitalization. ### Does Medicare pay for assisted living? Medicare generally does not cover long-term assisted living costs. It may provide limited coverage for skilled nursing rehabilitation after a qualifying hospital stay. ### Is assisted living suitable for someone with minor mobility issues? Yes. Many assisted living residents receive help with walking, bathing, dressing, or medication management while continuing to live independently. ### How do families know which option is right? The best choice depends on medical needs, functional abilities, physician recommendations, and personal preferences. Speaking with healthcare providers and senior living professionals can help families make an informed decision. **Categories:** Assisted Living, Skilled Nursing **Tags:** Assisted Living, Skilled Nursing --- ### [How to Find the Best Senior Facilities Near Me: A Comprehensive Guide](https://averyheights.org/senior-facilities-near-me-find-the-best/) **Published:** November 26, 2024 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** Choosing the right Senior Facilities Near Me is one of the most important decisions for seniors and their families. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the aging population is increasing rapidly, with over 20% of Americans expected to be 65 or older by 2030. This growing demand underscores the importance of finding care options that cater to individual preferences while ensuring safety, comfort, and quality of life. Whether you’re a senior seeking a vibrant new community, a caregiver navigating options for a loved one, or a family member wanting peace of mind for your cherished elder, this guide will walk you through the process of finding the best senior facilities near me. By the end of this article, you’ll have actionable tips and resources to make an informed decision suited to your needs. ## Understanding Senior Facilities Near Me Options There are a variety of Senior Facilities Near Me available today, each designed to accommodate unique needs and lifestyles. Here’s a quick breakdown of the most common types to help you understand which might best suit your situation: ### Independent Living Ideal for seniors who can manage most aspects of daily life independently, [independent living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) communities provide private living spaces with access to communal amenities and optional social activities. These communities are perfect for fostering an active, convenient lifestyle without the added worry of home maintenance. ### Assisted Living [Senior Facilities Near Me](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-comfortable-senior-living/) supports seniors who require help with daily tasks, such as medication management, cooking, or dressing, while still encouraging independence. For example, places like Avery Heights offer apartments with 24-hour staff, blending safety with individuality. ### Memory Care Memory care facilities focus on supporting individuals with Alzheimer’s, dementia, or other memory-related conditions. These facilities provide specialized staff, structured routines, and activities in a secure, cheerful environment designed to enhance residents’ quality of life. ### Skilled Nursing and Rehabilitation Skilled nursing facilities cater to seniors who need ongoing medical care and assistance. This is often a good solution for individuals recovering from surgeries or managing chronic health conditions. Some facilities, like **Avery Heights**, even offer short-term rehabilitation and long-term care options. ## Factors to Consider When Choosing Senior Facilities Near Me Navigating the search for the perfect senior care facility involves considering several key factors. Here’s what to look for: ### 1. Location and Accessibility Proximity to family and friends is crucial for many seniors. Consider whether the facility is conveniently located near loved ones or major hubs so visits can remain frequent and easy. If mobility is a concern, look into accessibility features like wheelchair ramps and elevators. ### 2. Quality of Care and Staff Research the credentials, experience, and training of the staff. Facilities such as **Avery Heights emphasize their history of over 65 years of quality care, making them a trusted choice. Additionally, pay attention to staff-to-resident ratios—better ratios generally lead to more attentive care. Look for reviews or testimonials describing the staff’s attitude and responsiveness. ### 3. Amenities and Activities A good senior facility should foster both comfort and engagement. Review available amenities, such as wellness centers, libraries, dining options, and outdoor spaces. A rich variety of activities, such as games, exercise classes, and social gatherings, ensures residents maintain an active and fulfilling lifestyle. ### 4. Safety and Security Features Safety is paramount in any senior facility. Ask about security measures such as 24-hour staff, surveillance, emergency call systems, and protocols for medical emergencies. For memory care patients, secured entrances and exits are particularly important. ### 5. Affordability and Payment Options Senior care can be costly, so understanding the financial aspects is crucial. Compare pricing structures across facilities and ask about what’s included in the cost. Many facilities are rental-based, such as **Avery Heights**, which means seniors won’t need to handle entrance fees or lengthy contracts. ## Steps to Finding the Best Fit ### 1. Research Potential Facilities Start by searching online for “senior facilities near me” to build a list of options. Websites like the AARP Caregiving Resource Center and [SeniorLiving.org](http://seniorliving.org/) offer tools for comparing facilities in your area. ### 2. Visit and Evaluate Facilities Take tours of the facilities on your shortlist. Pay attention to cleanliness, staff friendliness, and overall atmosphere. Does it feel welcoming and comfortable? ### 3. Ask the Right Questions Prepare a list of questions to bring with you. A few examples include: - How are medical emergencies handled? - What is the average wait time for maintenance requests? - Are meals included in the pricing, and can dietary preferences be accommodated? ### 4. Talk to Residents and Families Don’t hesitate to speak with current residents or their family members. They can provide valuable insights into the day-to-day living conditions and quality of care. ## Additional Resources and Tips ### Online Tools and Databases - [SeniorLiving.org](http://seniorliving.org/): Search for facilities and see ratings and reviews. - [AARP Caregiving Resource Center:](https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/) Offers a wealth of advice and tools for caregivers. - [Medicare’s Nursing Home Compare Tool](https://www.medicare.gov/care-compare/): Allows you to compare skilled nursing facilities approved by Medicare. ### Financial Guidance Navigating costs can be tricky. Explore government programs like Medicaid or veterans’ benefits, and consider speaking with a financial advisor who specializes in senior care planning. ### Support Groups Connect with others in your situation to share experiences and advice. Organizations like the Alzheimer’s Association offer support groups for caregivers and families navigating senior care. ## Making the Right Choice for Your Loved One Finding the best Senior Facilities Near Me is about much more than comfort; it’s about ensuring well-being, safety, and peace of mind for everyone involved. Taking the time to carefully evaluate your options, ask the right questions, and leverage resources will set you up for success in this important decision. Remember, whether you’re exploring independent living or seeking assisted care, Senior Facilities Near Me, like Avery Heights, stand out for their commitment to seamless healthcare, value, and compassionate support. Contact Avery Heights today at [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Keeping Seniors Active and Engaged - Tips for a Fulfilling Lifestyle at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/keeping-senior-wellness-and-engaged-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** August 25, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![senior wellness, Keeping Seniors Active](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/swimming-pool-senior-people-and-warm-up-for-learn-2024-08-13-00-23-13-utc-300x158.jpg "swimming-pool-senior-people-and-warm-up-for-learn-2024-08-13-00-23-13-utc - Avery Heights") Leading an active, fulfilling lifestyle is crucial for seniors to maintain excellent physical, emotional, and cognitive health as they age. Avery Heights, a rental-only community with a 65-year reputation for providing seniors with seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value, focuses on creating a vibrant living environment for seniors to thrive. Our diverse programming catering to various interests ensures that life at Avery Heights never becomes monotonous, keeping seniors engaged and motivated. In our upcoming blog series, we will examine the myriad ways seniors can stay active and engaged in their daily lives at Avery Heights. We will discuss fitness programs, social and recreational activities, creative hobbies, and volunteer opportunities in our community that promote a sense of belonging, adventure, and fulfillment. By showcasing these avenues, we aim to inspire seniors and their families to take advantage of these offerings and create an enriched lifestyle at Avery Heights. Physical activity is vital in maintaining overall health and well-being. Our blog series will delve into the variety of fitness options provided by Avery Heights, including group classes like yoga, aquatic exercises, and strength training sessions. In addition, we will touch upon [wellness programs and workshops that educate seniors](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-mental-wellness-for-seniors-at-avery-heights/) on proper nutrition and healthy living habits, empowering them to make informed choices for their well-being. Socializing and being part of a community contribute immensely to seniors’ emotional and cognitive health. At Avery Heights, seniors have numerous opportunities to [engage with their peers through planned social](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) events, clubs, and outings. We will explore these various events, highlighting the importance of fostering a sense of connection and camaraderie in our community. Creative pursuits and hobbies are invaluable in providing seniors with a sense of purpose, accomplishment, and joy. Our blog series will explore the artistic and creative programs available at Avery Heights, like art classes, knitting groups, and gardening clubs, and discuss the benefits these activities offer to seniors’ emotional well-being. Finally, we will investigate various volunteer opportunities available for seniors who wish to give back to their community and maintain a sense of purpose. From mentoring young students to facilitating activities within our community, Avery Heights encourages seniors to stay involved and make a difference in others’ lives. Our blog series aims to demonstrate that seniors can continue to lead rewarding lives in their golden years at Avery Heights, with endless opportunities and resources for staying active, engaged, and fulfilled. We hope to encourage seniors and their families to embrace a healthy, vibrant lifestyle within our exceptional rental-only community by presenting various programs and activities that cater to different interests and abilities. 1. Maintaining Physical Wellness Through Fitness Programs Physical activity is vital for seniors, contributing to overall health and well-being. At Avery Heights, we prioritize maintaining our residents’ physical wellness by providing a variety of fitness programs to suit diverse needs and preferences. Group classes such as yoga, tai chi, aquatic exercises, and strength training sessions cater to different ability levels, giving seniors the perfect opportunity to stay active, improve mobility, and promote mental clarity. Additionally, our wellness workshops educate seniors on proper nutrition and healthy living habits, empowering them to make informed decisions about their health. 2. Strengthening Social Connections and Community Bonds Socializing is crucial for seniors’ emotional and cognitive health. A sense of connection and camaraderie contributes to [improved happiness and quality of life](https://averyheights.org/10-ways-assisted-living-can-improve-your-quality-of-life/). Avery Heights fosters an active, engaged community through a variety of social events and activities. From game nights and book clubs to outings and holiday celebrations, we offer diverse opportunities for seniors to form meaningful relationships and share interests with their peers. By participating in these events, seniors can foster meaningful connections, enhance their sense of belonging, and maintain a sense of purpose within the community. 3. Cultivating Creative Hobbies and Pursuits Engaging in creative and artistic pursuits is invaluable for seniors’ emotional well-being and cognitive stimulation. At Avery Heights, we provide a wide range of creative programs to cater to different interests and skill levels. Our art classes, knitting groups, and gardening clubs encourage self-expression, exploration, and learning, contributing to seniors’ overall happiness and sense of accomplishment. Engaging in these activities also provides opportunities for developing new friendships as seniors bond over shared interests, discuss ideas, and celebrate each other’s achievements. 4. Making a Difference Through Volunteer Opportunities Volunteering enables seniors to give back, maintain a sense of purpose, and connect with others from diverse backgrounds. At Avery Heights, we offer various volunteer opportunities for seniors who desire to make a meaningful impact in their community. From mentoring young students and organizing event committees to facilitating activities for fellow residents, seniors can choose volunteer roles that align with their skills, interests, and values. These volunteer initiatives enrich the lives of Avery Heights residents and the larger community and provide seniors with an increased sense of self-worth and accomplishment. **Conclusion** At Avery Heights, we believe in providing seniors with a fulfilling lifestyle that nourishes their physical, emotional, and cognitive health. Through our diverse programming in fitness, social activities, creative pursuits, and volunteer opportunities, we strive to create a vibrant living environment where seniors can thrive. By embracing these opportunities, seniors and their families can build a rich, rewarding lifestyle filled with adventure, connection, and purpose. By showcasing these programs and activities, we hope to inspire seniors to embrace their golden years with enthusiasm, taking advantage of all the opportunities available at our rental-only community. Luckily, when it comes to [assisted living in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/our-community/), Avery Heights is here to provide a supportive and engaging environment for seniors to live their best lives. Through this approach, Avery Heights continues its 65-year tradition of providing residents with seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value in a supportive and nurturing environment. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Enhancing Mental Wellness for Seniors at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-mental-wellness-for-seniors-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** February 8, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Mental Wellness](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/02/senior-people-2023-11-27-05-24-24-utc-300x200.jpg "Senior people - Avery Heights") As individuals progress through their senior years, it is crucial to maintain not only physical health but also mental and emotional well-being. A growing body of research demonstrates the importance of mental health in promoting cognitive function, quality of life, and overall happiness for seniors. Recognizing the significance of mental wellness, senior living communities such as Avery Heights implement many strategies and services designed to support the mental health needs of their residents. For over 65 years, Avery Heights has been committed to providing an environment that promotes mental well-being, personal fulfillment, and the maintenance of strong social connections. In this article, we will explore how Avery Heights Senior Living Community supports mental wellness for its residents. Discover the range of programs, activities, and [services to promote cognitive health](https://averyheights.org/health-services/), reduce stress, and foster a sense of belonging among residents. Learn how Avery Heights’ dedicated care team works collaboratively with residents, their families, and healthcare providers to address mental health needs effectively and compassionately. Join us as we delve into the key components of mental wellness support at Avery Heights, including providing mental health resources, incorporating brain-stimulating and stress-reducing activities, and establishing supportive, open lines of communication. Whether you are seeking a senior living community for yourself or a loved one, this article will provide valuable insights into mental wellness’s vital role in shaping a rewarding and enriching senior living experience at Avery Heights. **Fostering Social Connections and Building Community** One of the essential aspects of mental wellness for seniors is maintaining strong social connections. Loneliness and isolation can negatively impact mental health, with [research revealing that social isolation is associated](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/) with an increased risk of depression and cognitive decline. At Avery Heights, several strategies are implemented to foster social interaction and build a sense of community among residents: 1. Group Activities: Avery Heights offers various group activities, including clubs, games, and social events, designed to unite residents and encourage social engagement. 2. Intergenerational Programs: Connecting with younger generations can have numerous mental health benefits, and Avery Heights facilitates opportunities such as mentorship programs and volunteer projects that unite seniors with individuals from different age groups. 3. Living Spaces: Designed to encourage interaction, Avery Heights’ communal living areas provide comfortable spaces where residents can socialize, connect, and relax. Encouraging Cognitive Stimulation Cognitive stimulation is valuable in promoting brain health, supporting memory, and slowing cognitive decline. Recognizing the importance of cognitive stimulation for seniors, Avery Heights offers several [activities and programs](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/) geared toward engaging the mind: 1. Lifelong Learning: At Avery Heights, education is highly valued, with opportunities for lifelong learning presented through guest lectures, seminars, and classes on various topics such as history, culture, and technology. 2. Brain-Healthy Activities: Avery Heights encourages participation in activities that promote cognitive functioning, such as puzzles, Sudoku, and strategic board games designed to challenge and stimulate the mind. 3. Creative Expression: Creative outlets, such as art, music, and writing, can be beneficial in enhancing cognitive health. Avery Heights allows residents to engage in creative pursuits through art classes, musical performances, and creative writing workshops. **Prioritizing Mental Health Support and Resources** Avery Heights has implemented a comprehensive mental health support system to ensure that residents receive the support they need to maintain optimal mental health. This system includes: 1. Onsite Professionals: Licensed mental health professionals are available onsite at Avery Heights to provide residents with counseling services, support groups, and personalized therapy as needed. 2. Collaboration with Healthcare Providers: The Avery Heights team collaborates closely with residents’ existing healthcare providers to ensure that mental health needs are effectively addressed and managed. 3. Mental Health Education and Awareness: To help residents and their families understand and navigate the complexities of mental health, Avery Heights provides resources and education on mental health topics, such as stress management, mindfulness techniques, and the signs and symptoms of common mental health conditions. **Integrating Stress-Reducing Activities and Mindfulness Practices** Managing stress is a critical aspect of maintaining mental wellness, particularly for seniors who may face unique challenges associated with aging, such as chronic pain or loss of independence. To help residents manage stress effectively, Avery Heights integrates stress-reducing activities and mindfulness practices into daily programming: 1. Physical Activity: Exercise and physical activity have been proven to reduce stress and improve mental well-being. Avery Heights offers various fitness programs tailored to seniors, from gentle exercises such as chair yoga and tai chi to more vigorous options like aerobics classes and walking clubs. 2. Mindfulness and Meditation: Incorporating mindfulness and meditation techniques, such as guided meditation and deep-breathing exercises, can positively impact stress reduction and mental wellness. Avery Heights allows residents to practice mindfulness through workshops, classes, and guided sessions. 3. Nature and Outdoor Spaces: Spending time in nature has been shown to reduce stress and improve mental well-being. Avery Heights encourages residents to connect with nature by offering well-manicured outdoor spaces, walking paths, and gardening opportunities. **Conclusion** At Avery Heights Senior Living Community, residents’ mental health and well-being are paramount. Through a multi-faceted approach encompassing [social engagement,](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) cognitive stimulation, mental health support, and stress reduction, Avery Heights cultivates an environment that nurtures mental wellness, personal fulfillment, and overall quality of life for its residents. If mental wellness is a key priority for you or your loved one’s senior living experience, consider visiting Avery Heights to discover our exceptional services and resources in supporting mental health. Schedule a tour today to witness firsthand how our [Hartford nursing home](https://averyheights.org/skilled-nursing-hartford-ct/) is committed to providing a happier, more fulfilled senior living experience. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [10 Common Misconceptions About Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/10-misconceptions-about-senior-living/) **Published:** May 22, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/11/23128-AVH-Assisted-Living-Header-Image_1920x577_72dpi1-1024x308.jpg "23128 AVH Assisted Living Header Image_1920x577_72dpi[1] - Avery Heights")As people age, their living preferences and needs also change. Senior living communities have become increasingly popular in recent years, providing older adults with a comfortable and convenient living experience. However, there are still various myths surrounding senior living that may discourage seniors from considering this option. In this article from trusted senior living in Hartford, CT, we’ll debunk ten common misconceptions or myths about senior living. **Myth #1: Senior Living is Expensive** One of the most common myths surrounding senior living is that it is too expensive. While some senior living communities may have high costs, there are various options available that are affordable and can fit within a senior’s budget. Additionally, [seniors can take advantage of financial assistance](https://averyheights.org/discovering-assisted-living-in-hartford-a-comprehensive-guide-for-seniors-and-caregivers/) programs, such as Medicaid, to help cover the costs of senior living. **Myth #2: Senior Living is Boring** Many people believe that senior living communities lack excitement and entertainment, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. Senior living communities offer a wide range of activities, events, and amenities designed to keep residents engaged and entertained. From fitness classes to social events and excursions, there’s always something happening in senior living communities. **Myth #3: Senior Living is Only for Sick People** Some people believe that senior living communities are only for individuals with health issues. However, senior living communities cater to a range of needs, including active seniors who want to live in a community with others their own age. Many senior living communities offer various levels of care, from independent living to skilled nursing care, making it suitable for seniors with different health conditions. **Myth #4: Senior Living is Like Nursing Homes** Many people equate senior living communities to nursing homes, which is another misconception. While nursing homes provide specialized care for individuals with complex medical needs, senior living communities offer a more comfortable and homely environment for seniors. Senior living communities offer various amenities, including private apartments, communal spaces, and a range of [social activities,](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) making it a more inviting and homely option for seniors. **Myth #5: Senior Living Communities are Depressing** Some people believe that senior living communities are depressing places to live. However, senior living communities are designed to promote a vibrant and active lifestyle, with various social events and activities to keep residents engaged. Additionally, living in a community with peers can help combat loneliness and promote socialization. **Myth #6: You Lose Your Independence in Senior Living Communities** Many seniors are concerned that living in a senior living community means losing their independence. However, senior living communities are designed to promote independence and allow seniors to live a comfortable and fulfilling life. Seniors can live in private apartments, cook their meals, and [engage in various activities](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) to maintain their independence. **Myth #7: Senior Living Communities are Far from Family and Friends** Another common myth surrounding senior living communities is that they are far from family and friends. However, senior living communities are located in various locations, making it possible to find one near family and friends. Additionally, many senior living communities offer transportation services to help residents stay connected with their loved ones. **Myth #8: Senior Living is only for Women** Many people believe that senior living communities are only for women, but this is not the case. Senior living communities cater to both men and women, providing a comfortable and safe living environment for all seniors. **Myth #9: Senior Living Communities are only for Rich People** Another common myth surrounding senior living communities is that they are only for wealthy people. While some senior living communities may have high costs, there are various affordable options available. Additionally, [seniors can take advantage of financial assistance](https://averyheights.org/discovering-assisted-living-in-hartford-a-comprehensive-guide-for-seniors-and-caregivers/) programs, such as Medicaid, to help cover the costs of senior living. **Myth #10: Senior Living Communities are for Seniors who can’t take care of themselves** Finally, many people believe that senior living communities are only for seniors who can’t take care of themselves. However, senior living communities cater to seniors with various needs, including active adults who want to live in a community with others their own age. Additionally, senior living communities offer various levels of care, from independent living to skilled nursing care, making it suitable for seniors with different health conditions. **Conclusion** Senior living communities offer a comfortable and convenient living experience for older adults. However, there are various myths surrounding senior living that may discourage seniors from considering this option. By debunking these myths, seniors and their families can make an informed decision about whether senior living in Hartford is the right choice for them. Avery Heights has been a top [assisted living in Hartford ](https://averyheights.org/our-community/)for seniors for more than 65 years. They offer rental-only living, so you don’t have to worry about expensive entrance fees or complicated contracts. Seniors can still enjoy exceptional care without the extra costs. Find out more about Avery Heights today! **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [Smooth Sailing into West Hartford Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-smooth-sailing/) **Published:** July 19, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** West Hartford Assisted Living: Moving to assisted living is a significant transition. It marks a new chapter in life that can be filled with excitement and apprehension. For seniors, families, and caregivers, ensuring this transition is as smooth as possible is crucial. This guide will walk you through how to move smoothly to assisted living in West Hartford, offering insights, tips, and practical steps to make the process seamless and enjoyable. ## West Hartford Assisted Living Understands Your Needs Assessing the level of care required and the amenities desired is essential before making any decisions. This step helps you find a community that best suits your needs. Start by evaluating the daily living activities that require assistance. Consider medical needs, mobility issues, and personal preferences. Do you need help with bathing, dressing, or medication management? Or maybe you are looking for a community offering social [activities and wellness programs](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/). Creating a list of these needs can provide clarity and direction. Next, think about the amenities that matter most to you. Do you prefer a spacious apartment or a cozy room? Is a [fitness center](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) or a library important? Many assisted living communities in West Hartford, like Avery Heights, offer a continuum of exceptional care and various amenities tailored to meet residents’ needs. Finally, consult with a healthcare professional to get their perspective. They can provide valuable insights into the level of [care required and recommend suitable communities](https://averyheights.org/top-9-advantages-of-living-in-a-memory-care-community/). This step ensures that the chosen community can cater to current and future health needs. ## Finding the Right Community Selecting the right assisted living community is a critical decision. Various factors must be considered to align with individual needs and preferences. Begin by researching the options available in West Hartford. Look for communities with a solid reputation, like Avery Heights, which has been known for providing seamless care and convenient living for over 65 years. Pay attention to reviews and testimonials from current and past residents and their families. Schedule visits to the communities on your shortlist. During these visits, observe the living conditions, interact with the staff, and ask questions about the services offered. Check the security measures in place, the cleanliness of the facilities, and the overall atmosphere. Talking to residents to get firsthand information about their experiences is also beneficial. Lastly, consider the cost and financial aspects. While Avery Heights offers a rental-only model without entrance fees or complex contracts, it’s essential to understand the costs involved and what they cover. Ensure the community fits your budget while meeting your care and lifestyle needs. ## Preparing for the Move Moving to assisted living involves planning, downsizing, and organizing. Although it can be overwhelming, it can be manageable and even enjoyable with the right approach. Start by creating a moving plan. List all the tasks that need to be done, such as sorting through belongings, packing, and coordinating with the moving company. Set a timeline for each task to ensure everything is done orderly. Downsizing is a significant part of the process. Decide what items to take, donate, or discard. Focus on keeping items that are sentimental or necessary for daily living. Remember that space in assisted living may be limited, so prioritize essentials and items that bring comfort. Organize the move by labeling boxes and keeping an inventory of your belongings. This step makes unpacking easier and ensures nothing gets lost in transit. Enlist the help of family and friends or consider hiring professional movers experienced in handling [transitions to assisted](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-transitioning-smoothly/) living. ## Settling In The next step is to settle into the new residence once the move is complete. Making the new place feel like home and building a sense of belonging is essential. Personalize your space by decorating with familiar items. Pictures, favorite books, and cherished mementos can create a comforting and homely atmosphere. Arrange furniture to your liking and add personal touches to make the space uniquely yours. Building a social network is crucial for emotional well-being. Participate in community activities and events to [meet other residents](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/meet-our-residents/). Joining clubs or interest groups can help forge new friendships and create a support system within the community. Get involved in community activities offered by the assisted living facility. Many communities, like Avery Heights, provide a range of programs, from fitness classes to cultural events. These activities can [enhance your quality of life](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-the-quality-of-life-for-seniors-with-memory-care-at-avery-heights/) and make the transition smoother. ## Supporting Seniors and Families The emotional aspects of transitioning to assisted living can be challenging for both seniors and their families. Addressing these emotions and maintaining strong family relationships during this time is essential. Open communication is key. Discuss feelings and concerns with family members and caregivers. This dialogue helps in understanding each other’s perspectives and provides emotional support. Regular check-ins and visits can reassure [seniors that their loved ones are still a part](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/how-to-pay-for-your-next-chapter-senior-living-part-1/) of their lives. Encourage family involvement in the transition process. Whether helping with the move, visiting frequently, or participating in community events, family presence can ease the emotional burden and make the transition more comfortable. Seek [support from professionals, such as counselors or support groups,](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-3/) who specialize in assisting seniors and families during transitions. These resources offer valuable guidance and coping strategies to manage the emotional aspects of the move. ## Conclusion With the right approach, transitioning to assisted living in West Hartford can be a positive and fulfilling experience. You can ensure a [smooth and enjoyable transition](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-transitioning-smoothly/) by understanding your needs, finding the right community, preparing for the move, settling in, and supporting seniors and families. Remember, this move marks the beginning of a new chapter filled with opportunities for growth, [social connections,](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) and a higher quality of life. If you found this guide helpful, consider sharing it with others who may benefit from these insights. [Contact ](https://averyheights.org/contact-retirement-community-hartford-ct/)us today to find the perfect West Hartford Assisted Living. Let’s make this [transition a smooth](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-transitioning-smoothly/) and enriching experience for you and your loved ones. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [How to Find the Best Senior Facilities Near Me: A Comprehensive Guide](https://averyheights.org/senior-facilities-near-me-a-comprehensive-guide/) **Published:** November 26, 2024 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** ![senior facilities near me](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/AH-header-10-300x90.jpg "AH-header-10 - Avery Heights")Choosing the right senior facilities near me is one of the most important decisions for seniors and their families. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the aging population is increasing rapidly, with over 20% of Americans expected to be 65 or older by 2030. This growing demand underscores the importance of finding care options that cater to individual preferences while ensuring safety, comfort, and quality of life. Whether you’re a senior seeking a vibrant new community, a caregiver navigating options for a loved one, or a family member wanting peace of mind for your cherished elder, this guide will walk you through the process of finding the best senior facilities near you. By the end of this article, you’ll have actionable tips and resources to make an informed decision suited to your needs. ## Understanding Senior Care Options There are a variety of senior care facilities available today, each designed to accommodate unique needs and lifestyles. Here’s a quick breakdown of the most common types to help you understand which might best suit your situation: ### Independent Living Ideal for seniors who can manage most aspects of daily life independently, independent living communities provide private living spaces with access to communal amenities and optional social activities. These communities are perfect for fostering an active, convenient lifestyle without the added worry of home maintenance. ### Assisted Living Assisted living facilities support seniors who require help with daily tasks, such as medication management, cooking, or dressing, while still encouraging independence. For example, places like Avery Heights offer apartments with 24-hour staff, blending safety with individuality. ### Memory Care Memory care facilities focus on supporting individuals with Alzheimer’s, dementia, or other memory-related conditions. These facilities provide specialized staff, structured routines, and activities in a secure, cheerful environment designed to enhance residents’ quality of life. ### Skilled Nursing and Rehabilitation Skilled nursing facilities cater to seniors who need ongoing medical care and assistance. This is often a good solution for individuals recovering from surgeries or managing chronic health conditions. Some facilities, like Avery Heights, even offer short-term rehabilitation and long-term care options. ## Factors to Consider When Choosing a Senior Facilities Near Me Navigating the search for the perfect senior care facility involves considering several key factors. Here’s what to look for: ### 1. Location and Accessibility Proximity to family and friends is crucial for many seniors. Consider whether the facility is conveniently located near loved ones or major hubs so visits can remain frequent and easy. If mobility is a concern, look into accessibility features like wheelchair ramps and elevators. ### 2. Quality of Care and Staff Research the credentials, experience, and training of the staff. Facilities such as Avery Heights emphasize their history of over 65 years of quality care, making them a trusted choice. Additionally, pay attention to staff-to-resident ratios—better ratios generally lead to more attentive care. Look for reviews or testimonials describing the staff’s attitude and responsiveness. ### 3. Amenities and Activities A good senior facility should foster both comfort and engagement. Review available amenities, such as wellness centers, libraries, dining options, and outdoor spaces. A rich variety of activities, such as games, exercise classes, and social gatherings, ensures residents maintain an active and fulfilling lifestyle. ### 4. Safety and Security Features Safety is paramount in any senior facility. Ask about security measures such as 24-hour staff, surveillance, emergency call systems, and protocols for medical emergencies. For memory care patients, secured entrances and exits are particularly important. ### 5. Affordability and Payment Options Senior care can be costly, so understanding the financial aspects is crucial. Compare pricing structures across facilities and ask about what’s included in the cost. Many facilities are rental-based, such as Avery Heights, which means seniors won’t need to handle entrance fees or lengthy contracts. ## Steps to Finding the Best Fit ### 1. Research Potential Senior Facilities Near Me Start by searching online for “senior facilities near me” to build a list of options. Websites like the AARP Caregiving Resource Center and [SeniorLiving.org](http://seniorliving.org/) offer tools for comparing facilities in your area. ### 2. Visit and Evaluate Senior Facilities Near Me Take tours of the facilities on your shortlist. Pay attention to cleanliness, staff friendliness, and overall atmosphere. Does it feel welcoming and comfortable? ### 3. Ask the Right Questions Prepare a list of questions to bring with you. A few examples include: - How are medical emergencies handled? - What is the average wait time for maintenance requests? - Are meals included in the pricing, and can dietary preferences be accommodated? ### 4. Talk to Residents and Families Don’t hesitate to speak with current residents or their family members. They can provide valuable insights into the day-to-day living conditions and quality of care. ## Additional Resources and Tips ### Online Tools and Databases - [SeniorLiving.org](http://seniorliving.org/): Search for facilities and see ratings and reviews. - [AARP Caregiving Resource Center](https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/): Offers a wealth of advice and tools for caregivers. - [Medicare’s Nursing Home Compare Tool](https://www.medicare.gov/care-compare/): Allows you to compare skilled nursing facilities approved by Medicare. ### Financial Guidance Navigating costs can be tricky. Explore government programs like Medicaid or veterans’ benefits, and consider speaking with a financial advisor who specializes in senior care planning. ### Support Groups Connect with others in your situation to share experiences and advice. Organizations like the Alzheimer’s Association offer support groups for caregivers and families navigating senior care. ## Making the Right Choice for Your Loved One Finding the best senior facility near you is about much more than comfort; it’s about ensuring well-being, safety, and peace of mind for everyone involved. Taking the time to carefully evaluate your options, ask the right questions, and leverage resources will set you up for success in this important decision. Remember, whether you’re exploring independent living or seeking assisted care, facilities like Avery Heights stand out for their commitment to seamless healthcare, value, and compassionate support. Contact Avery Heights today at [(860) 953-1201](https://www.google.com/search?q=Avery+Heights&stick=H4sIAAAAAAAA_-NgU1I1qLCwTDUzNUoxTjM2MzFMM06zMqhIS0s0NrRINjAyN08zNkhNWsTK61iWWlSp4JGamZ5RUgwA87BbCzkAAAA&hl=en&mat=CR4apRE1GEIxElcBqiIDwmaKUS78A4vG_56dCpp1Fd-D-y4Eu5wQGH8oM8L3cYbUjK5v0Hz_yJN1fs_06icEvma2VaApVgrltdHsbL6ZVJQtEh_oSQGBhQVDT1AnENXbMR0&authuser=0#) **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Maintaining Social Connections in Senior Living Communities](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) **Published:** January 26, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Social Connections](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/01/group-of-senior-friends-bonding-at-home-for-dinner-2024-08-28-22-21-05-utc-300x200.jpg "Group of senior friends bonding at home for dinner party - Avery Heights")As seniors age, social connections become increasingly significant in maintaining their well-being and happiness. Studies have shown that strong social ties can improve cognitive function, emotional health, and longevity. Today’s senior living communities, like Avery Heights, recognize the importance of social engagement in seniors’ lives and are now designed to facilitate meaningful interactions, relationships, and camaraderie among residents. For over 65 years, providing older adults with seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value in a rental-only community setting that promotes social connections and a thriving atmosphere. This article will delve into how Avery Heights Senior Living Community fosters social connections, highlighting the diverse range of activities, programs, and events to ensure all residents have ample opportunities to engage with their peers and create lasting memories. Discover how Avery Heights goes the extra mile to create a vibrant, welcoming environment that encourages seniors to build friendships, participate in meaningful activities, and enjoy a fulfilling lifestyle. Join us as we explore the different facets of social connection opportunities at Avery Heights, including wellness and fitness classes, hobby clubs, interactive events, and volunteering opportunities. Additionally, learn how Avery Heights’ commitment to ongoing communication, support, and a sense of community helps residents overcome feelings of isolation and loneliness often experienced in senior years. Whether you’re looking for a senior living community for yourself or a loved one, allow this article to serve as a valuable resource in understanding how social connections are prioritized and maintained at Avery Heights Senior Living Community. **A Diverse Array of Activities and Programs** At the core of Avery Heights’ approach to fostering social connections is its diverse range of activities, programs, and events designed to cater to residents’ varying interests, abilities, and preferences. By offering a robust [activity calendar](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/activity-calendar/) encouraging social interaction, Avery Heights provides residents ample opportunities to meet new people, share experiences, and forge strong friendships. Some examples of [activities and programs](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/) offered at Avery Heights include: 1. Wellness Classes: Residents can take part in group exercise classes, such as yoga, tai chi, or aerobics, that cater to seniors’ unique fitness needs and abilities. These classes provide a fun, social atmosphere to stay physically active. 2. Hobby Clubs: For those with specific interests, Avery Heights offers hobby clubs like gardening clubs, book clubs, or art classes, creating common ground for residents to connect with like-minded peers. 3. Social Events: Regularly scheduled events, such as game nights, holiday celebrations, and themed parties, encourage residents to come together, socialize, and enjoy each other’s company in an engaging and festive atmosphere. 4. Educational Programs: Seminars, workshops, and guest speaker events provide residents valuable learning opportunities while promoting stimulating conversations and connections between attendees. Encouraging Interaction and Communication Creating a sense of community and belonging is critical to maintaining social connections in a senior living community. Avery Heights devotes significant resources toward promoting seamless communication and strong bonds between residents, staff, and family members. Key elements of this approach include: 1. Open Communication: Avery Heights fosters open lines of communication between residents, staff, and families, ensuring that everyone is informed about upcoming events, news, and community updates. 2. New Resident Support: To help new residents acclimate to the community, Avery Heights offers support and resources to ease the transition, such as orientation sessions and welcome committees encouraging social connections and friendships. 3. Family Involvement: Recognizing the importance of maintaining family relationships, Avery Heights hosts special events and activities encouraging family members to participate, fostering deeper connections and stronger support networks for residents. **Thriving Community Spaces** Well-designed community spaces are essential in creating a social atmosphere that encourages interaction and engagement among residents. Avery Heights features thoughtfully designed community areas that promote conversation, leisure, and camaraderie. These spaces include: 1. Shared Dining Rooms: Meal times provide valuable opportunities for residents to share their day, make new friends, and enjoy lively conversations with fellow residents over delicious meals. 2. Recreation Areas: Spacious and inviting lounge spaces, activity rooms, and outdoor seating areas offer residents comfortable settings to relax, converse, and connect with each other during leisure time. 3. Therapeutic Gardens: Beautifully maintained gardens and walking paths provide a serene setting for residents to socialize, stroll, or enjoy outdoor activities while experiencing the benefits of nature and fresh air. **Enriching Lives Through Volunteering and Community Involvement** In addition to on-site activities and programs, Avery Heights recognizes that giving back to the broader community fosters a sense of purpose, belonging, and social connection among residents. Offering accessible volunteer opportunities and community service initiatives can forge a strong sense of camaraderie, accomplishment, and connection for seniors. Examples of these opportunities include: 1. Community Outreach: Avery Heights residents can participate in charitable initiatives, such as food drives or clothing donations, to give back to their community and forge connections with nonprofits and local service organizations. 2. Intergenerational Programs: Residents can engage with younger generations through partnerships between the senior living community and local schools, fostering connections and the sharing of wisdom, experiences, and life lessons. 3. Peer-to-Peer Support: Residents are encouraged to support one another by sharing their skills and experiences, such as offering to teach a fellow resident a new skill or participating in a buddy system to ensure neighbors feel welcomed and engaged. **Conclusion:** Avery Heights Senior Living Community’s commitment to fostering social connections, engagement, and meaningful relationships for its residents is evident in its diverse activities and programs, welcoming community spaces, open communication, and focus on volunteer opportunities. By prioritizing social connections and offering ample opportunities for residents to build friendships, engage in shared interests, and support one another, Avery Heights helps seniors thrive and enjoy a fulfilling, high-quality lifestyle.Avery Heights is the place to be if you are considering a senior living community that genuinely values social connections and well-being. Schedule a tour today to experience how Avery Heights’ vibrant, nurturing atmosphere can enhance your senior living experience and create lasting memories and connections. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Compassionate Dementia Care in Hartford, CT | Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/compassionate-dementia-care-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/) **Published:** April 30, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![dementia care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/happy-woman-portrait-and-hug-with-senior-patient-2024-06-25-00-04-58-utc-300x167.jpg "happy-woman-portrait-and-hug-with-senior-patient-2024-06-25-00-04-58-utc - Avery Heights") Dementia isn’t just about memory loss. It reshapes lives—not only for those experiencing it but also for the families and caregivers supporting them. With the increasing prevalence of dementia-related conditions, the demand for specialized care has never been greater. At **Avery Heights**, we understand the unique challenges of dementia care. That’s why we’re dedicated to enhancing the quality of life for individuals with cognitive impairments and providing peace of mind for their loved ones. Whether you’re exploring options for “**memory care facilities near me**” or simply looking for compassionate expertise, this guide will explain how Avery Heights delivers dignified, person-centered care in Hartford, CT. ## Understanding Dementia and Why Specialized Care Matters Dementia affects over 55 million people worldwide. It’s a complex condition that involves more than memory decline—it impacts thinking, communication, and behavior. What makes dementia care so vital is its ability to address these challenges in ways that support emotional and physical well-being. Specialized dementia care focuses on meeting the needs of individuals living with Alzheimer’s disease, vascular dementia, and other related conditions. This care goes beyond basic assistance, incorporating tailored approaches that preserve dignity, enhance functionality, and foster meaningful connections. ## Introducing Avery Heights and Our Commitment to Dementia Care Nestled in Hartford, CT, **Avery Heights** has been a pillar of compassionate senior care for over 65 years. Our campus offers a continuum of care options, including **specialized memory care programs** designed to meet the diverse needs of individuals with cognitive impairments. At Avery Heights, we view dementia care as more than just meeting medical needs. It’s about nurturing the individuality of each resident while fostering emotional connections. This commitment stems from our belief that every person deserves to live with dignity, purpose, and joy—even in the face of life-altering conditions. ## What Sets Our Dementia Care Programs Apart ### Individualized Care Plans No two dementia journeys are the same, so our care programs begin with a thorough assessment of each resident’s needs, preferences, and history. This allows us to create **personalized care plans** that address everything from dietary requirements to communication styles. For example, a resident who loves music might benefit from **music therapy sessions**, while someone with a passion for gardening could find joy and calm in our sensory-based horticultural activities. These tailored programs ensure that each resident feels seen and valued. ### Engaging Therapeutic Activities Enrichment is a core component of our [memory care](https://averyheights.org/expert-memory-care-services-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/) programs. Residents can enjoy a range of **therapeutic activities**, including: - **Art therapy** to encourage self-expression - **Reminiscence therapy** to stimulate long-term memory - **Movement classes** to maintain physical and mental well-being - **Group activities** like storytelling, puzzles, and games to promote social interaction The goal isn’t just to fill time but to create moments of purpose, engagement, and joy. ## The Role of Trained Staff and Caregivers At Avery Heights, our staff members aren’t just caregivers—they’re highly trained professionals with expertise in dementia care. Our team undergoes continuous education to stay updated on the latest research and best practices. Our caregivers are skilled in handling the complexities of [dementia](https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/dementia/symptoms-causes/syc-20352013), from recognizing signs of anxiety to using techniques like **redirection** and **validation therapy** to manage challenging behaviors. Beyond their expertise, our staff exudes empathy and patience. Every interaction is approached with understanding, ensuring that residents feel respected and supported, no matter what the day brings. ## A Safe and Nurturing Environment Safety is paramount when it comes to [memory care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/). Avery Heights offers a **secure and meticulously designed environment** to minimize risks while promoting independence. Our memory care facilities include features like: - **Secured outdoor areas** for safe exploration - **Calm, soothing decor** to reduce confusion - **Wayfinding cues** to help residents navigate independently - Advanced **safety monitoring systems** to ensure resident well-being This thoughtful design ensures that residents feel at ease while families gain the peace of mind they deserve. ## Schedule a Visit or Request More Information Choosing the right care for a loved one with dementia is one of the most important decisions you’ll make. At Avery Heights, we’re here to support you every step of the way. We’d like to invite you to[ **schedule a tour**](https://averyheights.org/#tour) of our memory care center or speak with one of our specialists to learn more about our programs. Whether you’re just beginning your search or ready to decide, we’re here to help. [Contact Us Today!](http://#) ## Prioritize Quality of Life with Compassionate Dementia Care At Avery Heights, our mission is simple but profound—to empower individuals living with dementia to lead fulfilling, dignified lives. By blending expertise, compassion, and community, we create an environment where residents thrive and families find peace of mind. If you’re searching for **memory care facilities near me**, don’t wait to explore everything Avery Heights offers. Compassionate care is just a call or visit away. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Engaging Activities and Enriching Social Programs at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** January 11, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Activities](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/01/group-of-senior-friends-playing-chess-at-the-park-2023-11-27-05-33-47-utc-300x193.jpg "Group of senior friends playing chess at the park - Avery Heights") For seniors, engaging activities in meaningful and enjoyable activities is paramount to maintaining overall well-being and fostering a strong sense of community. Participating in various social programs promotes cognitive stimulation and facilitates emotional and social growth, ultimately enhancing the quality of life. Avery Heights Senior Living Community understands the importance of fostering an active and fulfilling lifestyle for its residents. With over 65 years of experience in providing seamless care and extraordinary value, Avery Heights offers a wealth of engaging activities and social programs designed to cater to its residents’ diverse interests and abilities. In this article, we will dive into the array of activity options available at Avery Heights and explore how the community’s social programs cater to residents’ individual preferences and needs. We will discuss the role these activities and programs play in facilitating connections among residents and delve into how they contribute to participants’ cognitive, emotional, and social growth. Additionally, the article will provide insights into the dedicated and compassionate staff at Avery Heights, who work tirelessly to create a dynamic and inclusive environment for residents to thrive. Join us in this journey as we shed light on the engaging and enriching experiences available at Avery Heights and discover the exceptional commitment that this senior living community demonstrates in providing residents with a vibrant, active, and fulfilling lifestyle. Whether you are considering Avery Heights for yourself or a loved one, this article will offer valuable insights into the compelling social experiences and the positive impact they can have on the lives of seniors. **Comprehensive Activity Calendar to Suit Diverse Interests** At Avery Heights, the dedicated staff creates a comprehensive activity calendar filled with diverse, engaging, and fun programs designed to suit residents of varied interests and abilities. The [activity calendar](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/activity-calendar/) is meticulously planned, ensuring something for everyone, ranging from physical pursuits and brain-boosting exercises to creativity sessions and social events. Here are a few examples of the types of activities residents can enjoy at Avery Heights: 1. Physical Activities: Residents can participate in various physical activities such as fitness classes, yoga, walking clubs, and swimming, helping them maintain their physical well-being and increase overall mobility. 2. Cognitive Stimulation: Brain-boosting activities like puzzles, trivia games, and memory-inspired challenges encourage cognitive stimulation, keeping residents mentally sharp and engaged. 3. Creative Expressions: To promote self-expression and foster artistic skills, residents can participate in painting classes, pottery workshops, and other forms of creative expression. 4. Socialization Opportunities: Avery Heights provides many opportunities for social interaction through group activities, clubs, and special events, helping residents make new friends and strengthen existing connections. **Fostering Connections Among Residents Through Social Programs** One of the main objectives of Avery Heights’ social programs is to foster connections among residents in the community. By creating an inclusive environment, these [programs motivate residents to engage in activities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/) with their peers, promote shared interests, and celebrate the communal experience. Some of the ways Avery Heights foster connections among residents through its social programs include: 1. Interest-Based Clubs: Clubs such as book clubs, gardening clubs, and crafting circles allow residents with shared interests to come together and bond over their mutual passions. 2. Group Activities and Outings: Organized group activities and outings encourage camaraderie among residents, providing opportunities for shared experiences and memories. 3. Special Events and Celebrations: Avery Heights regularly hosts special events such as holiday parties and themed gatherings, prompting residents to come together and revel in the festive spirit. 4. Volunteer Opportunities: Participating in on-site volunteering programs offers residents a chance to give back to the community, strengthening relationships with peers and enhancing their sense of belonging. **Emphasizing Cognitive, Emotional, and Social Growth Through Activities** A key aspect of Avery Heights’ engaging activities and social programs is their focus on enhancing residents’ overall cognitive, emotional, and social growth. By providing thoughtfully planned activity options, the staff at Avery Heights promotes stimulation and enrichment in the following aspects of residents’ lives: 1. Cognitive Enhancement: Offering activities that encourage mental engagement, such as memory games and educational seminars, helps keep residents’ minds sharp and supports cognitive health. 2. Emotional Well-being: Stress-relieving activities like art sessions, meditation, and support groups provide residents with tools and resources to manage their emotions, fostering a sense of inner peace and confidence. 3. Social Skills Development: Participation in group activities and socializing opportunities allows residents to practice and refine their social skills, leading to stronger connections and improved mental health. 4. Sense of Purpose: By providing meaningful experiences, Avery Heights helps residents find a renewed sense of purpose and personal growth, which contributes to their overall well-being. Avery Heights’ Dedicated Staff: Essential to Success The dedicated staff at Avery Heights play a crucial role in creating an engaging and inclusive environment for residents. The team’s exceptional commitment to fostering a dynamic and enriching atmosphere contributes significantly to the success of the community’s social programs and activity offerings. Key aspects of the staff’s role at Avery Heights include: 1. Tailoring Activities: Avery Heights’ staff possess the expertise to tailor activities for individuals of all levels of ability and preference, ensuring all residents can enjoy and benefit from the programs offered. 2. Personal Connections: Staff members work closely with residents to develop and maintain personal connections, taking the time to understand their unique interests and preferences when planning activities. 3. Encouragement and Support: The Avery Heights team consistently encourages and supports residents in their participation in activities, providing guidance and fostering a sense of accomplishment. 4. Continuous Improvement: Through gathering resident feedback and staying informed of current best practices, staff at Avery Heights continually improve and innovate in their approach to activity planning and delivery. **Conclusion:** At Avery Heights Senior Living Community, the wide range of engaging activities and social programs provided serve to enrich the lives of residents by fostering connections, cognitive stimulation, and emotional well-being. Through a comprehensive [activity calendar](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/activity-calendar/), dedicated staff, and diverse opportunities for personal growth, Avery Heights delivers a vibrant and fulfilling living experience. If you or a loved one is seeking a [senior living community in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/), that boasts a dynamic array of engaging activities and social programs, consider Avery Heights as the premier choice. Schedule a tour of our community today and experience the difference an active, connected, and enriching lifestyle can make! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Finding Memory Care Facilities Near Me in Hartford, Connecticut](https://averyheights.org/finding-memory-care-facilities-near-me-in-hartford-connecticut/) **Published:** December 1, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Searching for [**memory care facilities near me**](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) is often driven by urgency, emotion, and a desire to find the *best possible care* close to home. For families in **Hartford, Connecticut**, the search comes with unique considerations—access to leading healthcare systems, proximity to family members, and communities designed to support individuals living with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia. This comprehensive guide is designed to help families understand memory care, explore local Hartford-area options, and confidently choose a facility that offers safety, dignity, and quality of life. --- ## What Is Memory Care? Memory care is a specialized form of senior living designed specifically for individuals living with: - Alzheimer’s disease - Dementia - Lewy body dementia - Vascular dementia - Other cognitive impairments Unlike traditional assisted living, **memory care communities** provide: - Secure, structured environments - Staff trained in dementia care - Daily routines that reduce confusion and anxiety - Programs focused on cognitive engagement and emotional well-being When families search for *memory care facilities near me*, they are often looking for **specialized care that balances safety, independence, and compassion**. --- ## Why Families Search for Memory Care Facilities Near Me Families in Hartford often begin searching for memory care when they notice changes such as: - Increased confusion or wandering - Difficulty with daily tasks like dressing or eating - Safety concerns at home - Changes in personality or behavior - Caregiver burnout Choosing a local [memory care facility](https://averyheights.org/finding-home-away-from-home-how-to-evaluate-senior-facilities-near-me/) allows families to remain involved while ensuring their loved one receives professional, around-the-clock care. --- ## Why Hartford, Connecticut Is an Ideal Location for Memory Care Hartford offers several advantages for families seeking memory care facilities nearby: ### 1. Access to Leading Healthcare Hartford is home to nationally recognized hospitals, specialists, and neurological care providers—an essential factor for individuals living with dementia. ### 2. Established Senior Living Communities The greater Hartford area includes long-standing senior living and memory care communities with experienced leadership and well-trained staff. ### 3. Family-Friendly Location Central Connecticut allows families from [West Hartford](https://www.westhartfordct.gov), [Bloomfield](https://www.bloomfieldct.gov), [Newington](https://www.newingtonct.gov), [Wethersfield](https://wethersfieldct.gov), and [East Hartford](https://www.easthartfordct.gov) to stay closely connected. ### 4. Calm, Residential Settings Many memory care facilities near Hartford are located in peaceful neighborhoods, providing a soothing environment ideal for cognitive health. --- ## What to Look for in Memory Care Facilities Near Me Not all memory care communities are the same. When evaluating options in Hartford, consider the following essential factors. ### Specialized Dementia Training Staff should receive ongoing education in [dementia care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/), communication techniques, and behavioral support strategies. ### Secure Environment Look for features such as: - Controlled entrances and exits - Secure outdoor courtyards - Thoughtfully designed layouts that prevent confusion ### Person-Centered Care Plans The best memory care facilities tailor care plans to each resident’s: - Cognitive abilities - Personal history - Preferences and routines ### Structured Daily Programming Meaningful activities help residents stay engaged and improve quality of life, including: - Music therapy - Art and creative expression - Gentle exercise - Memory-enhancing activities ### Family Communication Top memory care communities prioritize transparency and regular communication with families. --- ## How Much Do Memory Care Facilities Near Hartford Cost? Costs vary depending on services, location, and level of care, but memory care in Hartford typically includes: - Private or semi-private apartments - 24/7 supervision - Personalized care plans - Meals and housekeeping - Cognitive and wellness programming While memory care may cost more than assisted living, it also provides significantly higher levels of supervision and expertise. Families should ask about: - What services are included - Additional care costs - Medicaid or long-term care insurance acceptance --- ## Signs It’s Time to Consider Memory Care You may want to begin searching for **memory care facilities near me** if you notice: - Wandering or getting lost - Increased agitation or aggression - Difficulty recognizing familiar people - Unsafe use of appliances - Decline in personal hygiene Early placement in memory care can often **improve adjustment and reduce stress** for both residents and families. --- ## Questions to Ask When Touring Memory Care Facilities ![memory care facilities near me](https://t14361490.p.clickup-attachments.com/t14361490/81b390a0-05b1-4312-9cd4-559469839af6/image.png) When visiting memory care communities in Hartford, ask: - How is staff trained in dementia care? - What is the staff-to-resident ratio? - How do you manage behavioral changes? - What does a typical day look like? - How are families kept informed? Take note of how residents interact with staff and whether the environment feels calm and welcoming. --- ## The Importance of Local memory care facilities near me for Families Choosing memory care close to home offers significant benefits: - Easier visits and stronger emotional connections - Better coordination with local physicians - Familiar surroundings for residents - Peace of mind for families For many families, finding **memory care facilities near me in Hartford** provides both practical and emotional reassurance. --- ## Supporting Quality of Life in Memory Care The best memory care facilities focus not just on safety—but on *living well*. Quality communities emphasize: - Respect and dignity - Independence where possible - Emotional and social connection - Purpose-driven daily routines These elements are critical to maintaining a sense of identity and well-being for individuals living with dementia. --- ## Planning Ahead for memory care facilities near me in Hartford Planning early allows families to: - Explore multiple communities - Understand costs and care levels - Prepare emotionally and financially - Make informed decisions without pressure Even if care isn’t immediately needed, researching **memory care facilities near you** can provide clarity and peace of mind. --- ## Finding the Right memory care facilities near me Searching for [**memory care facilities near me**](https://averyheights.org) is more than a location-based query—it’s a search for trust, compassion, and expertise. Hartford, Connecticut, offers a range of reputable memory care communities designed to support individuals living with dementia while giving families confidence and comfort. By understanding your loved one’s needs, asking the right questions, and focusing on quality of care, you can find a memory care facility near you that truly feels like home. If you’re beginning your search in Hartford, [start with tours](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min), [conversations](https://averyheights.org/contact/), and careful evaluation because the right memory care community can make a meaningful difference in every stage of the journey. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Navigating Senior Living Options: Discover the Avery Heights Approach](https://averyheights.org/navigating-senior-living-options-discover-the-avery-heights-approach/) **Published:** July 24, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/family-reunion-for-birthday-party-celebration-in-r-2025-01-16-13-06-58-utc-300x200.jpg "Family Reunion For Birthday Party Celebration In Retirement Home - Avery Heights")Navigating the world of senior living options can be a daunting and confusing task for seniors and their loved ones. With an overwhelming number of options, how do you find the right choice that meets your individual needs? At Avery Heights, we understand this challenge, and that’s why we have dedicated more than 65 years to providing older adults with seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value. A continuum of exceptional care is at the heart of the Avery Heights mission. We recognize that each senior has unique needs and preferences, meaning that offering personalized support is essential. We will discuss the wide variety of services available to our residents — from independent living and assisted living to rehabilitation services and skilled nursing care. We will explore how our highly skilled staff works to create a customized [care plan](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) for each resident, ensuring they maintain the highest possible quality of life. Also, we will highlight the amenities and activities designed to promote a sense of belonging, recreation, and well-being for everyone at Avery Heights. From our serene walking paths and welcoming common spaces to our bustling [activity calendar](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/activity-calendar/) featuring fitness classes, group outings, and social events, we strive to create an interactive and supportive environment for our residents. **Ending the Search for the Perfect Senior Living Community** When it comes to finding the perfect senior living community, the options can seem endless, and choosing the right one can be daunting and time-consuming. Considering amenities, accessibility, cost, and level of care is essential to ensure you find the perfect fit. Here at Avery Heights, we take pride in offering a unique approach to senior living, focusing on rental-only communities catering to seniors’ evolving needs. This model allows residents the flexibility to make changes to their living situations as needed without worrying about entrance fees or complex contracts. **Solving the Problem of Hefty Upfront Costs** One of the most significant benefits of a rental-only senior living community is financial freedom. Unlike traditional retirement communities, which often involve steep entrance fees and complicated contracts, rental-only models allow seniors to invest in their living situation without the burdens of hefty upfront costs. This approach provides seniors with more flexibility and autonomy in choosing their living arrangements and adjusting them as their needs evolve throughout the years. Additionally, rental-only communities like Avery Heights offer an extensive array of services to support residents’ diverse needs. From independent living to assisted living, rehabilitation services, and skilled nursing [care, our continuum of care ensures residents feel supported](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/) and cared for no matter how their needs might change. **Prioritising Personalized Care** At Avery Heights, we understand that each resident brings a unique set of needs and desires to the table. We are dedicated to creating tailored, comprehensive [care plans](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) to address these needs and ensure our residents maintain the highest possible quality of life. Our interdisciplinary care team consists of highly trained professionals, including registered nurses, licensed practical nurses, certified nursing assistants, and skilled therapists who work collaboratively to create an optimal care experience for each resident. In addition to clinical support, our non-medical staff members are committed to assisting residents with daily tasks, such as grooming, housekeeping, and meal preparation. Our dedication to personalised care allows us to cater to each individual’s physical, emotional, and social well-being, promoting a sense of dignity and independence for all residents. **Delivering Housing Options Tailored to Suit Your Needs** Avery Heights offers diverse housing options designed to provide a comfortable living environment in line with your unique preferences and requirements. Our rental-only offerings consist of spacious independent living apartments with various floor plans, assisted living suites for those who need extra support with daily tasks, and [short-term rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/short-term-rehabilitation/) and skilled nursing care options for residents recovering from illnesses or surgeries. Each apartment and suite includes modern amenities and ample storage, ensuring residents feel comfortable and at home in their living space. Safety features such as emergency response systems, camera monitoring, and secure entrances and exits provide residents and their families with peace of mind knowing their well-being is of the utmost importance. **Creating a Warm and Engaging Community Atmosphere** At Avery Heights, creating a vibrant, welcoming community is as important as providing exceptional care. Our residents are encouraged to engage with their neighbours and partake in various on-site activities to promote recreation, socialisation, and physical well-being. Our community offers beautiful outdoor spaces, including serene walking paths and gardens, inviting common areas suitable for reading or socialising, and a robust activity calendar filled with fitness classes, group outings, and social events. We also understand the importance of lifelong learning and offer numerous educational and cultural programs to nurture our residents’ curiosity and intellect. With an extensive offering of recreational, creative, and wellness-focused activities, Avery Heights caters to a wide range of interests while fostering a sense of belonging and community for each resident. Final Thoughts As seniors and their families navigate the maze of senior living options, it becomes crucial to find a community that prioritises both high-quality care and a warm, welcoming environment. By offering a rental-only model that prioritises flexibility, personalised care, diverse housing options, and a strong sense of community, Avery Heights strives to provide seniors with the best possible living situation for their unique needs. Learn more about our remarkable approach to senior living and the extraordinary value we provide for our residents and their families. Schedule a visit to Avery Heights today, and see how we do [senior living in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/request-information-avery-heights-hartford/)! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Personalized Care Services at Avery Heights -Ensuring Seniors' Comfort, Well-being, and Independence](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) **Published:** August 17, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Personalized Care Services](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/2023apfm-300x89.jpg "2023apfm - Avery Heights")A crucial aspect of any senior living community is the ability to provide personalized and compassionate care services tailored to meet the unique needs of each individual. At Avery Heights, we have more than 65 years of experience providing seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value, ensuring seniors live their best lives in our rental-only community. From independent living to assisted living and skilled nursing care, our dedicated staff is committed to accommodating residents’ health and lifestyle needs while maintaining their independence, dignity, and individuality. At Avery Heights, our priority is to provide exceptional care and ensure residents can maintain their independence and enjoy a fulfilled, vibrant life within our rental-only community. By offering personalized care services that cater to seniors’ individual health and lifestyle demands, we create an environment where residents feel truly supported and valued, free from the burden of entrance fees or complex contracts. In this, we hope to impart valuable insights into the comprehensive care services offered at Avery Heights and empower seniors and their families in making important decisions regarding their retirement living options. By showcasing our unwavering dedication to [meeting each resident’s](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/meet-our-residents/) unique needs, both physical and emotional, we aim to demonstrate the unmatched rental-only experience that awaits seniors when they choose Avery Heights as their new home. 1. Personalized Care Plans: Catering to Each Resident’s Unique Needs At Avery Heights, creating customized care plans is central to our overall approach to senior living. Our goal is to ensure each resident receives optimal attention tailored to individual needs, preferences, and medical conditions. In our blog series, we will discuss: – Personalization Process: Learn how our staff conducts in-depth assessments and evaluations to develop a thorough understanding of each resident’s needs and create a suitable care plan. – Continuum of Care: Dive into the various levels of care within our rental-only community, ranging from independent living and assisted living to skilled nursing care, providing seamless support to seniors as their needs evolve. – Coordinating Family Involvement: Explore how we collaborate with residents’ families, fostering open communication and ensuring they are well-informed and involved in their loved one’s care. 2. Coordinating with Medical Professionals: Collaborative Efforts for Comprehensive Care Our collaboration with healthcare providers is integral to delivering exceptional care to our residents. We prioritize a team [approach to ensure residents receive proper care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/) and support. Our blog series will cover: – Medical Relationships: Understand Avery Heights’s partnerships with primary care physicians, specialists, and other healthcare providers to ensure residents’ access to essential medical services. – On-Site Healthcare: Discover how we provide a range of healthcare services within our community, including on-site nursing staff, therapist consultation, and personalized fitness programs to encourage health and wellness. – Emergency Response: Learn about Avery Heights’s measures to prioritize resident safety and provide immediate response to emergency situations, ensuring prompt and appropriate care. 3. Ensuring Emotional Support: Fostering a Warm and Empathetic Environment Providing emotional support to seniors is an indispensable aspect of our care services at Avery Heights. Our approach entails cultivating a compassionate and encouraging atmosphere to promote overall well-being. Our blog series will address: – Emotional Well-being: Discover how our staff works to prioritize residents’ physical needs and emotional well-being, recognizing the interconnectedness of both aspects. – Supportive Staff: Delve into the empathy, warmth, and understanding that our caregivers bring to their roles while tending to residents’ individual needs. – Assessing and Adapting: Learn how we regularly evaluate our residents’ emotional well-being and adapt our care approach accordingly, striving to provide support and encouragement in all aspects of their lives. 4. Engaging Residents in Their Care: Empowering Seniors to Have Choice and Agency As part of our commitment to providing personalized care services, we believe in giving residents a voice in their care decisions. This philosophy fosters a sense of ownership and agency, empowering [seniors to maintain](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) their independence. Our blog series will explore: – Informed Decision-Making: Learn how we involve residents in conversations about their care, providing them with all necessary information for making informed choices. – Respecting Choices: Dive into the ways Avery Heights respects residents’ decisions and preferences to the greatest extent possible, ensuring their choices are valued and incorporated into their care plan. – Community Outreach: Understand how residents can participate in internal and external community initiatives, providing input and guidance on the types of services, programs, and events they desire. **Conclusion** As a rental-only senior living community with a long-standing reputation for providing seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value, Avery Heights is dedicated to ensuring that residents receive personalized care services and support tailored to their unique needs. From [comprehensive assessments to customized care](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-quality-senior-care/) plans, coordination with medical professionals and emotional support, our approach always prioritizes residents’ comfort, well-being, and independence. Through this, we hope to demonstrate the exceptional personalized care experience that awaits seniors at Avery Heights, empowering residents and their families to make informed decisions while seeking retirement living options. It is our unwavering dedication to addressing each resident’s physical and emotional needs that sets Avery Heights apart as the premier choice for [assisted living in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) in a welcoming and supportive environment. Ask us about our services today! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Avery Heights - Exploring Independent Living Options: Keys to an Exceptional Community](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-exploring-independent-living-options-keys-to-an-exceptional-community/) **Published:** August 4, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/group-of-diverse-friends-together-2023-11-27-05-09-40-utc-300x226.jpg "Group of diverse friends together - Avery Heights")Avery Heights, with its strong reputation for providing seniors with seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value for more than 65 years, offers an exceptional independent living experience within a rental-only community. As seniors and their families navigate the complexities of senior living options, understanding the unique advantages that come with a rental-only community is vital. In our upcoming blog series, we will delve into how Avery Heights meets the diverse needs of its residents, going above and beyond to provide unparalleled services, amenities, and lifestyle options. We will offer valuable insights, guidance, and practical advice to help [seniors and their families navigate](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/) the decision-making process and discover the exceptional advantages offered at Avery Heights’ rental-only community. Our blog series aims to illuminate the advantages of opting for a rental-only independent living community and showcase the amazing amenities, services, and lifestyle opportunities offered at Avery Heights. By shedding light on these essential factors, we aim to ensure seniors and their families make informed and confident choices while embarking on the remarkable journey of retirement living. Seamless Transition and Continuum of Care: Upholding Independence, Safety, and Well-being One key factor that sets Avery Heights apart from other senior living communities is our commitment to providing a smooth transition for seniors while ensuring they receive the appropriate level of care. Our blog series will delve into the continuum of [care services](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) that cater to our residents’ diverse needs: - Independent Living: Residents enjoy an active, worry-free lifestyle with the support of our on-site staff and a wide range of services, including housekeeping and maintenance. - Assisted Living: Seniors who require additional support with daily tasks such as medication management or personal care can benefit from our customized assisted living services without sacrificing their independence. - Skilled Nursing: In times of need, our skilled nursing facility offers comprehensive, compassionate care, addressing each resident’s health and well-being with the utmost professionalism. Avery Heights recognizes the importance of providing seniors and their families with transparent, affordable, and flexible living arrangements. As a rental-only community, we eliminate the burden of entrance fees and complex contracts, ensuring stress-free living. In our blog series, we will discuss the advantages of a rental-only model: - No Entrance Fees: Seniors and their families can preserve their financial resources without the pressure of a hefty down payment, allowing them to allocate funds towards other priorities. - Monthly Rental Plans: Our simple, all-inclusive rental contracts provide predictable monthly expenses, enabling residents to budget without surprises effectively. - Flexibility and Freedom: Seniors enjoy the benefits of a comprehensive independent living experience without being locked into long-term commitments, providing the freedom to adjust their living arrangements as their needs evolve. - Luxurious Amenities and Comfortable Living Spaces: Catering to Diverse Lifestyle Preferences Avery Heights offers a plethora of modern amenities and comfortable living spaces designed to cater to various preferences, ensuring a sustainable, vibrant, and enjoyable independent living experience. Our blog series will take a closer look at the [luxurious amenities](https://averyheights.org/experience-unparalleled-comfort-luxury-amenities-at-avery-heights/) and distinctive housing options available at our community: - Spacious Residences: From cozy one-bedroom suites to expansive, multi-bedroom apartments, Avery Heights provides a wide variety of comfortable and stylish living spaces, ensuring the perfect fit for every resident. - On-site Dining Options: Our exceptional dining services offer a diverse selection of nutritious and delicious meal options, with the flexibility to accommodate residents’ unique dietary preferences and needs. - Resort-style Amenities: Our community boasts numerous state-of-the-art amenities, including a fitness center, swimming pool, and art studio, allowing residents to enjoy their favorite pastimes without venturing far from home. A Thriving Social Environment: Promoting Engagement, Stimulation, and Enjoyment At Avery Heights, a stimulating and engaging social atmosphere is essential for a fulfilling independent living experience. We pride ourselves on providing a wide range of activities, clubs, and events that foster a strong sense of community and promote an enjoyable lifestyle. Our blog series will highlight the diverse social opportunities offered within our rental-only community, such as: - Interest-based Clubs and Groups: Residents can explore and pursue their passions through clubs catering to various interests, such as photography, gardening, or dance. - Educational Seminars and Workshops: Seniors can engage in lifelong learning experiences, enhancing their knowledge and staying intellectually stimulated. - Community Events and Celebrations: Regular parties, cultural events, and holiday festivities bring residents together, fostering camaraderie and creating a warm, welcoming atmosphere. **Conclusion** At Avery Heights, we are steadfast in our commitment to offering an exceptional independent living experience for seniors within a rental-only community. Through seamless care transitions, financial flexibility, luxurious living spaces, and a thriving social environment, our rental-only community caters to the diverse needs and preferences of our residents, providing unparalleled services, amenities, and lifestyle opportunities. By exploring various aspects of our community, we hope to convey the genuine care, convenience, and exceptional value that Avery Heights has built its solid reputation upon for over 65 years. When it comes to[ senior independent living cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living-hartford-ct/) and other amenities, Avery Heights stands apart as a premier choice. We invite you to visit our community and experience the Avery Heights difference for yourself. Contact us today to schedule a tour and start your journey towards a vibrant and fulfilling independent living lifestyle. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Enriching Lives Through Independent Living at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/enriching-lives-through-independent-living-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** December 22, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/senior-couple-of-old-people-dating-outdoors-2023-11-27-05-18-43-utc-300x200.jpg "Senior couple of old people dating outdoors - Avery Heights") Many seniors dream of a fulfilling and worry-free retirement lifestyle, and independent living communities like Avery Heights can be the perfect solution to achieve that aspiration. For over 65 years, Avery Heights has earned an outstanding reputation for providing seniors with unparalleled care, convenient living arrangements, and exceptional value. As a rental-only community, Avery Heights lets seniors escape the burdens of entrance fees and complex contracts while offering access to an incredible array of services, amenities, and exceptional care. In this article, we will delve into the world of independent living at Avery Heights Senior Living Community, where seniors can thrive, grow, and form meaningful connections. From well-designed living spaces to a stimulating assortment of activities and programs, the independent living at Avery Heights has everything a senior needs to lead an enriching and fulfilling life. Additionally, residents can enjoy peace of mind knowing that Avery Heights offers multiple levels of care within the community should their needs change. Join us in exploring the distinct features that set Avery Heights independent living apart, including comfortable accommodation options, comprehensive services, diverse social and recreational activities, and an unbeatable location. We will also discuss the sense of community and opportunities for personal growth in this vibrant setting. Arm yourself with the knowledge needed to make an informed decision for yourself or your loved ones, and discover how independent living at Avery Heights can enrich their lives, providing the perfect balance of care, convenience, and companionship. **Comfortable Accommodation Options** One of the primary attractions of independent living at Avery Heights is the range of comfortable and thoughtfully designed living spaces available for residents to choose from. The community offers various apartment styles and floor plans, ensuring [seniors can find the perfect housing](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/senior-living-resources-moms-house/) solution suited to their needs and preferences. Some key features of these residences include: 1. Spacious Floor Plans: Each apartment is designed to provide ample living space, allowing residents to furnish and decorate according to their personal tastes and style. 2. Full-Size Kitchens: Apartments at Avery Heights are equipped with modern, full-size kitchens, providing residents with the opportunity and convenience of preparing their meals whenever they desire. 3. Safety Features: Residences are designed with seniors in mind, incorporating essential safety features such as grab bars and emergency call systems for added peace of mind. 4. Maintenance-free Living: Professional staff handles all maintenance concerns, ensuring residents enjoy a worry-free lifestyle. **Comprehensive Services and Amenities** Avery Heights Independent Living offers residents exceptional services and amenities designed to make life more convenient, enjoyable, and vibrant. From daily necessities to luxurious indulgences, the community caters to every aspect of a [fulfilling and engaging lifestyle](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/). Some of the notable services and amenities include: 1. Culinary Services: Residents can enjoy delicious and nutritious meals prepared by professional chefs and served in the elegant on-site dining room. 2. Transportation: Avery Heights provides scheduled transportation for appointments, shopping, and other off-site activities, making it convenient for residents to travel as they please. 3. Housekeeping and Linen Services: Staff care for routine cleaning and linen services, allowing residents more time to enjoy their interests and explore new pursuits. 4. Fitness and Wellness Center: The on-site fitness and wellness center ensures residents can maintain a healthy and active lifestyle through various exercise programs, classes, and equipment. **Diverse Social and Recreational Opportunities** A gratifying and stimulating independent living experience at Avery Heights focuses on comfortable living arrangements and convenient services and centers around creating a diverse and dynamic social environment. Various [social and recreational activities](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) are designed to cater to different interests, skill levels, and desires. Some examples of these activities include: 1. Organized Social Events: Residents can participate in various social events and outings, helping them forge new friendships and deepen existing bonds. 2. Educational Programs and Workshops: Seniors can further their knowledge and learn new skills through various classes, workshops, and guest lectures. 3. Art and Music Classes: Creativity is highly valued at Avery Heights, with many art classes and music events for residents to explore and express their artistic sides. 4. Fitness and Wellness Programs: From yoga to aerobics, Avery Heights offers various fitness programs that promote physical well-being and a healthy lifestyle. **Unbeatable Location and Sense of Community** Avery Heights Independent Living Community is beautiful and serene, providing residents with breathtaking views, easy access to local attractions, and a feeling of belonging to a close-knit community. Such an incredible location offers many advantages: 1. Proximity to Local Attractions: Residents can enjoy convenient access to shopping destinations, walking trails, and cultural attractions, making it easy to stay involved in the community beyond Avery Heights. 2. Stunning Natural Beauty: Avery Heights’s picturesque surroundings offer a peaceful and tranquil environment in which to relax, recharge, and enjoy the magnificence of nature. 3. Sense of Community: A combination of compassionate staff and friendly neighbors fosters an intimate atmosphere where seniors can connect, support each other, and create lasting memories. **Conclusion:** Independent living at Avery Heights is an exceptional experience, where seniors can lead a fulfilling and engaging lifestyle in an environment tailor-made for their needs and desires. With a keen focus on comfortable accommodation options, comprehensive services, diverse social and recreational opportunities, an unbeatable location, and a genuine sense of community, residents will find all they need and more at Avery Heights. If you or your loved ones are looking for an independent living community that combines convenience, camaraderie, and exceptional care, look no further than Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Explore our [senior independent living cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living-hartford-ct/) and the opportunities that await you as you begin a new chapter in life, one filled with joy, growth, friendship, and unforgettable experiences. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Podcast Episode: When Is It Time to Consider Assisted Living? A Hartford Family's Guide](https://averyheights.org/podcast-episode-when-is-it-time-to-consider-assisted-living-a-hartford-familys-guide/) **Published:** July 2, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Two women share a comforting moment: one elderly woman holds the other's hand in a sunny living room with a plant and photos on a shelf nearby.” ,](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/When-Is-It-Time-to-Consider-Assisted-Living-A-Hartford-Familys-Guide-scaled.jpg "When Is It Time to Consider Assisted Living A Hartford Familys Guide - Avery Heights") Families often find themselves facing difficult questions as a loved one grows older. As care needs evolve, understanding the available support options becomes essential for making informed decisions that promote safety, independence, and overall well-being. One of the most challenging decisions involves determining when additional support is needed and whether assisted living may provide a safer, healthier, and more fulfilling lifestyle. The answer is rarely obvious. Aging happens gradually, and changes in health, mobility, memory, and daily routines can be easy to overlook when they occur over months or years. In the [Avery Heights podcast](https://averyheights.org/podcasts/), Siobhan explores one of the most common concerns families face: when to consider assisted living. The discussion addresses warning signs, common misconceptions, and practical factors Hartford-area families should evaluate when comparing care options. Understanding the differences between support services can help you make informed decisions with confidence. ## Understanding the Assisted Living Decision Many older adults value their independence and want to remain in familiar surroundings for as long as possible. Family members often share that goal and work hard to provide support when challenges arise. However, there comes a point when the level of assistance required exceeds what family caregivers or home-based services can realistically provide. [Assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) is designed for older adults who want to maintain independence while receiving help with everyday activities. For instance, medication management, dressing, bathing, housekeeping, and meal preparation. Residents live in private apartments or suites and have access to professional support, social opportunities, and safety features that can improve quality of life. Recognizing the right time to make the transition can prevent avoidable health risks, reduce caregiver stress, and create opportunities for greater engagement and wellness. ## Why do Families Often Wait Too Long? Many families delay conversations about senior living because the topic feels emotional. Adult children may worry about taking away a parent’s independence, while older adults may associate assisted living with a loss of freedom. In reality, delaying a move can sometimes limit available choices. A crisis such as a fall, hospitalization, medication error, or sudden illness often forces families to make decisions quickly. Under those circumstances, finding the right community becomes more stressful. Planning ahead allows families to explore options, tour communities, ask questions, and involve their loved one in the decision-making process. The transition tends to be smoother when it occurs before a significant health event creates urgency. ## Signs It May Be Time to Consider Assisted Living Certain indicators suggest that additional support may improve safety and overall well-being. These signs often emerge gradually and may be easy to overlook when viewed in isolation. Recognizing these patterns early allows families to explore available options proactively. Thus, they can make informed decisions before a crisis occurs. By addressing concerns sooner, older adults can [transition more comfortably](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/) and maintain a higher quality of life. Early recognition of these warning signs can help families identify the most appropriate level of care. ### Daily Tasks are Becoming Difficult One of the earliest signs is increasing difficulty with everyday activities that were once routine. Preparing meals, managing medications, keeping up with housekeeping, or maintaining personal hygiene may begin to require more time or assistance. While these changes may seem minor at first, they signal that additional support could help an older adult remain safe and maintain their independence. Assisted living provides help with daily tasks while allowing residents to continue participating in as much of their routine as possible. ### Safety Concerns are Increasing Frequent falls, balance issues, difficulty using stairs, forgetting to turn off appliances, or trouble getting in and out of the bathtub can all increase the risk of serious injury. Some older adults may also become disoriented or wander, creating additional concerns for loved ones. Assisted living communities are designed to reduce these risks through accessible living spaces, emergency response systems, and trained staff. These features offer greater peace of mind while helping residents maintain their confidence and independence. ### Social Isolation is Affecting Well-Being Many older adults experience increasing social isolation. Spending more time alone can contribute to loneliness, depression, anxiety, and declining physical health, especially when favorite hobbies and community activities become harder to enjoy. A supportive assisted living community helps residents reconnect through social events, wellness programs, educational activities, and shared dining experiences. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), these opportunities encourage meaningful relationships and promote an active lifestyle. ### Family Caregiving is Becoming Overwhelming Family caregivers often provide remarkable support, but caregiving responsibilities can become increasingly difficult to sustain as needs grow. Balancing work, family obligations, and caregiving can lead to physical exhaustion, emotional stress, and difficulty in medical management. When caregiving demands begin affecting the health and well-being of both the caregiver and the older adult, assisted living can provide valuable support. Professional caregivers can assume care responsibilities, allowing families to spend more meaningful time together. ### Health Needs are Becoming More Complex Chronic health conditions often require increasing levels of monitoring and support over time. Arthritis, diabetes, heart disease, vision loss, or mild cognitive impairment can make everyday routines more challenging and increase the likelihood of complications when care is improper. Assisted living communities provide personalized support that adapts as residents’ needs evolve while encouraging them to remain as independent as possible. Thus, residents can enjoy daily life in a safe, comfortable environment. ## Assisted Living vs. Home Care in Hartford One of the most common questions families ask involves the difference between assisted living and home care. Understanding the strengths and limitations of each option is essential when evaluating the best fit for a loved one’s needs. Both care options are designed to support older adults, but they differ in how services are delivered and the level of assistance available. The right choice depends on factors such as health needs, lifestyle preferences, safety considerations, and the availability of family support. ### What does Home Care Offer? [Home care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/) allows older adults to remain in their residences while receiving assistance from professional caregivers. Services may include help with personal care, meal preparation, medication reminders, and companionship. For individuals with relatively limited support needs, home care can be an effective solution. Remaining in a familiar environment may also provide comfort and continuity. This option allows older adults to receive assistance while maintaining their existing routines and connections within their community. However, home care often has limitations. Coverage may only be available for specific hours each day, leaving gaps in support. As care needs increase, the cost of extended home care services can rise significantly. ### What does Assisted Living Provide? When comparing assisted living vs. home care, Hartford families often discover that assisted living offers a more comprehensive support system. By combining housing, care services, social opportunities, and daily support in one setting, assisted living can simplify care management while enhancing overall quality of life. Residents benefit from a comprehensive support system designed to promote comfort, safety, and independence. Services often include professional assistance throughout the day, emergency response support, nutritious daily meals, housekeeping, maintenance, and scheduled transportation. In addition, residents have access to social activities, [wellness-focused programs](https://averyheights.org/wellness/), and opportunities for community engagement. Rather than coordinating multiple service providers independently, families gain access to a structured environment designed specifically to support older adults. ### Evaluating the Right Fit The best choice depends on individual circumstances. Families should consider factors such as safety, social engagement, [healthcare needs](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/quick-and-easy-tips-to-staying-healthy/), caregiver availability, and long-term financial planning. A senior who remains active and requires only occasional assistance may do well with home care. Someone experiencing increasing mobility challenges, isolation, or ongoing support needs may benefit more from assisted living. Choosing between home care and assisted living requires careful consideration of an individual’s unique needs, preferences, and long-term goals. Evaluating factors such as safety, support requirements, social opportunities, and future care needs can help in decision-making. The right choice can enhance quality of life while providing both older adults and their loved ones with greater confidence and peace of mind. Taking a [proactive approach](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) can help ensure that support remains aligned with evolving needs, preserving dignity, comfort, and independence. ## The Emotional Side of the Decision [Practical considerations](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/) are important, but emotions often play an equally significant role. Older adults may fear losing independence, leaving a long-time home, or adjusting to unfamiliar surroundings. Adult children may feel guilt or worry about whether they are making the right choice. Open communication helps reduce anxiety and build trust throughout the process. Families can make assisted living conversations more productive by approaching them with empathy, patience, and open communication. Listening carefully to concerns, involving loved ones in decision-making, and focusing on goals rather than limitations can help build trust and reduce anxiety. Discussing safety and quality of life while exploring communities together also encourages a [positive decision-making process](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/). When discussions center on maintaining independence and improving well-being, assisted living often feels less intimidating and more empowering. ## Why do Earlier Conversations Lead to Better Outcomes? Many families wait until a crisis occurs before discussing senior living options. Early conversations create opportunities for thoughtful planning and reduce pressure during emotionally challenging situations. Starting the discussion before support becomes urgently necessary allows older adults to participate actively in selecting a community that aligns with their preferences and lifestyle. Families also gain time to understand available services, compare options, and prepare financially for future needs. Proactive planning often results in smoother transitions and greater satisfaction after the move. It also gives families more time to explore available options, compare services, and address any concerns before a decision becomes urgent. Early preparation can help older adults feel more confident and involved throughout the transition process. ## How does Avery Heights Support Hartford Families? At Avery Heights, assisted living is designed to help residents maintain independence while receiving [personalized support](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/) in a welcoming environment. The community’s approach focuses on enhancing quality of life by providing the right level of assistance while respecting each resident’s preferences, dignity, and individuality. Residents enjoy private living spaces, engaging social opportunities, wellness-focused programming, and access to compassionate team members who understand the importance of preserving dignity and choice. Families frequently discover that moving to assisted living provides more opportunities for meaningful relationships. Rather than focusing primarily on caregiving tasks, family visits can become opportunities to connect, celebrate milestones, and spend quality time together. Individuals exploring assisted living options are encouraged to learn more about our Assisted Living services and review answers to common questions through our Join Our Community FAQ resources. ## Listen to More Conversations on Senior Living Siobhan discusses important topics affecting older adults and their families. The podcast provides practical guidance, [expert perspectives](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/), and educational resources designed to help Hartford-area families navigate senior living decisions with confidence. Families seeking additional guidance can continue learning through the Avery Heights podcast series. You can [explore episodes](https://averyheights.org/podcasts/) and discover more insights on aging, wellness, caregiving, and community living. For specific questions, [put in a request](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/) with your queries. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### How do I know when it is time to consider assisted living? Common indicators include difficulty managing daily tasks, increasing safety concerns, social isolation, medication management challenges, and growing caregiver stress. A pattern of these issues often suggests that additional support could improve quality of life. ### Is assisted living more affordable than home care? Costs vary depending on care needs and service levels. For individuals requiring extensive daily assistance, assisted living may offer greater value by combining housing, meals, activities, support services, and safety features into one monthly cost. ### What is the difference between assisted living and nursing care? Assisted living focuses on helping residents with daily activities while promoting independence. Skilled nursing communities provide more intensive medical care for individuals with significant health needs. ### Can family members remain involved after a move to assisted living? Absolutely. Family involvement remains an important part of life in assisted living communities. Many families find they can spend more meaningful time together once caregiving responsibilities are reduced. ### How can families start the assisted living conversation? Begin early, focus on goals related to safety and quality of life, listen to concerns, and involve your loved one throughout the process. Visiting communities together can also help make discussions more productive and reassuring. **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [How We Honor Veterans at Avery Heights: Programs, Dedications, and Community](https://averyheights.org/how-we-honor-veterans-at-avery-heights-programs-dedications-and-community/) **Published:** June 15, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** For many older adults, military service represents one of the most meaningful chapters of their lives. The values developed through service include integrity, courage, sacrifice, leadership, and commitment to others. These continue to shape veterans long after their active duty years have ended. At Avery Heights, honoring those contributions is an important part of building a welcoming and respectful community. As a trusted senior living community in Hartford, Avery Heights recognizes the unique experiences of veterans and their families. Through special programs, commemorative events, community partnerships, and educational resources, residents who have served our country receive recognition that extends beyond holidays and ceremonies. The goal is to create an environment where veterans feel valued, connected, and understood every day. Families searching for veterans senior living Hartford CT options often want more than quality care and comfortable accommodations. Many seek a community that genuinely appreciates military service and provides meaningful opportunities for veterans to remain engaged. [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/) embraces that responsibility by fostering a culture of gratitude, connection, and respect. ## Why Honoring Veterans Matters in Senior Living? Military service leaves a lasting impact on individuals and families. Veterans often carry memories of deployments, training, leadership experiences, and lifelong friendships formed during service. As veterans age, opportunities to share those stories and connect with others who understand their experiences become increasingly valuable. [Senior living communities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/) play an important role in preserving those connections. Recognition programs help veterans feel seen and appreciated, while social opportunities create spaces where shared experiences can strengthen relationships and reduce isolation. Many veteran residents appreciate being part of a community where their service is acknowledged naturally and respectfully. Recognition can improve emotional [well-being](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/), encourage social engagement, and create a stronger sense of belonging. Family members often find comfort knowing their loved ones live in an environment that honors an important part of their identity. At Avery Heights, military service is viewed as a meaningful contribution worthy of ongoing recognition rather than occasional acknowledgment. ## A Community Built on Respect and Appreciation Respect is one of the core values that shape daily life at Avery Heights. [Veterans are welcomed](https://averyheights.org/2026-veterans-benefits-for-senior-housing-what-you-need-to-know/) into a community where their stories, experiences, and accomplishments are valued. Many residents enjoy sharing memories from different branches of the military, discussing historical events they witnessed, and connecting over common experiences. These conversations often lead to meaningful friendships and deeper community connections. Staff members also understand the importance of recognizing military service with dignity and sincerity. Learning about residents’ backgrounds helps create more personalized relationships and allows team members to celebrate important milestones and achievements. The result is an atmosphere where veterans can feel comfortable discussing their experiences while also enjoying all the benefits of an active and engaging senior living lifestyle. ## Veteran Recognition Events Throughout the Year Special events provide opportunities for residents, families, and staff to come together in recognition of military service. Some common events include: ### Veterans Day Celebrations Veterans Day is one of the most meaningful annual events within the community. Residents who served in the military are recognized through ceremonies, tributes, and gatherings designed to honor their commitment and sacrifice. These celebrations often include: - Recognition of veterans from all branches of the military - Opportunities for residents to share service stories - Patriotic music and entertainment - Family participation and community engagement - Special presentations honoring military achievements The focus remains on creating an experience that feels personal and meaningful rather than ceremonial alone. ### Memorial Day Observances Memorial Day provides an opportunity to remember and honor those who made the ultimate sacrifice in service to the nation. Residents and staff gather to reflect on the significance of the day while paying tribute to fallen service members. These observances often encourage reflection, education, and appreciation for the freedoms protected by generations of military personnel. ### Military Branch Recognition Throughout the year, Avery Heights may recognize significant anniversaries and milestones associated with different military branches. These moments create opportunities for veterans to celebrate their service while helping fellow residents learn more about military history and traditions. ## Preserving Stories and Personal Legacies Every veteran has a unique story worth preserving. Military experiences often span decades and include extraordinary moments of courage, perseverance, and leadership. Avery Heights encourages residents to share their personal histories with family members, fellow residents, and future generations. [Storytelling](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-veterans-wall-of-honor-melvin-christensen/) can become a powerful way to preserve memories while strengthening relationships within the community. Residents often enjoy discussing: - Military training experiences - Service assignments and deployments - Leadership lessons learned during service - Historical events witnessed firsthand - Friendships formed during military careers These conversations create opportunities for veterans to reflect on their accomplishments while helping younger generations understand the significance of military service. Family members frequently treasure the stories shared during these discussions, especially when they gain new insights into experiences their loved ones may not have previously discussed in detail. ## Building Connections Among Veterans One of the greatest benefits of a veteran-friendly senior living environment is the opportunity to connect with others who share similar experiences. Veterans often form meaningful bonds based on mutual understanding and respect. Shared experiences can create immediate connections, even among individuals who served in different branches or during different eras. At Avery Heights, veterans have opportunities to engage with fellow residents through social gatherings, educational programs, discussion groups, and community events. These interactions help foster friendships while creating a supportive environment where veterans feel understood. The sense of camaraderie developed through these relationships often contributes significantly to overall well-being and quality of life. ## Supporting Veteran Families Military service affects entire families, not just the individual who served. Spouses, children, and loved ones often share in the sacrifices and challenges associated with military life. Recognizing those contributions is an important part of honoring veterans. Avery Heights welcomes family involvement and encourages participation in veteran recognition events and community celebrations. Family members often appreciate opportunities to learn more about available resources, benefits, and [support programs](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/) related to veteran services. Educational events and informational resources can help families make informed decisions regarding senior living, healthcare, and financial planning. Creating a supportive environment for both veterans and their loved ones strengthens the entire community. ## Understanding VA Benefits for Senior Living in Connecticut Many families exploring senior living options are unaware that veterans may qualify for benefits that can help offset certain expenses. Understanding VA benefits senior living Connecticut resources can make a significant difference when evaluating long-term care and housing options. The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs offers several programs designed to support eligible veterans and surviving spouses. Benefits vary depending on service history, eligibility requirements, health needs, and financial circumstances. Programs that may be relevant include: - Veterans pension benefits - Aid and Attendance benefits - Healthcare services through the VA - Long-term care support programs - Assistance for eligible surviving spouses Aid and Attendance is one of the most commonly discussed programs among senior living families. This benefit may provide additional financial assistance to qualifying veterans and surviving spouses who require help with daily activities. Eligibility requirements can be complex, and benefit amounts vary based on individual circumstances. Families are encouraged to consult qualified veteran service organizations, accredited VA representatives, or financial professionals when evaluating available options. Understanding available benefits early in the planning process can help families make more informed decisions regarding senior living and long-term care. ### Connecting Residents with Valuable Resources Navigating veteran benefits can sometimes feel overwhelming. Many veterans and family members are surprised by the number of programs available or are uncertain about where to begin. Avery Heights understands the importance of connecting residents and families with reliable information and trusted resources. Guidance may include directing individuals toward organizations that specialize in veteran benefits, financial assistance programs, and support services. Access to educational resources helps veterans maximize available benefits while reducing confusion during important planning decisions. When families have accurate information, they are better positioned to identify solutions that align with their needs and long-term goals. ### Community Partnerships that Support Veterans Veteran recognition becomes even more meaningful when communities work together to support those who served. Avery Heights values relationships with veteran-focused organizations, community groups, and local resources that share a commitment to honoring military service. These connections can provide educational opportunities, special programming, and additional support for veteran residents and their families. Collaborative efforts may include: - Educational presentations - Guest speakers from veteran organizations - Community recognition events - Volunteer opportunities - Resource-sharing initiatives Partnerships strengthen the community while expanding opportunities for residents to remain engaged and connected. ## The Lasting Impact of Recognition and Community Recognition is about more than ceremonies and special events. Genuine appreciation creates an environment where veterans feel respected, valued, and included every day. For many residents, sharing stories, connecting with fellow veterans, and participating in meaningful programs contribute significantly to emotional well-being. These opportunities help preserve personal legacies while creating lasting friendships and memories. A strong sense of community can be particularly important during later stages of life. Veterans who feel connected to others often experience greater engagement, improved quality of life, and a stronger sense of purpose. Avery Heights remains committed to fostering an environment where military service is honored with sincerity and gratitude throughout the year. ## Why Veterans Choose Avery Heights? Families searching for veterans senior living Hartford CT communities often seek an environment that combines quality senior living with meaningful recognition of military service. Avery Heights provides: - A welcoming and supportive community - Opportunities for veteran connection and camaraderie - Meaningful recognition programs and events - Educational resources related to veteran benefits - Family-centered support and engagement - A culture built on respect, dignity, and appreciation Veterans have dedicated part of their lives to serving others. They deserve a community that recognizes those contributions while supporting their continued well-being, independence, and sense of belonging. Military service reflects a lifelong commitment to courage, sacrifice, and leadership. Avery Heights is proud to recognize those contributions through meaningful programs, supportive relationships, and a community culture rooted in respect. For veterans and their families exploring senior living options in Hartford, Avery Heights [offers](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/) more than a place to live. It offers a community where service is remembered, stories are valued, and every veteran is honored for the lasting impact they have made. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### What makes Avery Heights a veteran-friendly senior living community? Avery Heights honors military service through recognition events, community programs, educational resources, and opportunities for veterans to connect with fellow residents who share similar experiences. ### Are veterans eligible for financial assistance for senior living in Connecticut? Some veterans and surviving spouses may qualify for programs such as VA pension benefits or Aid and Attendance benefits. Eligibility depends on several factors, including military service history and financial circumstances. ### What is the VA Aid and Attendance benefit? Aid and Attendance is a supplemental benefit available to certain eligible veterans and surviving spouses who require assistance with daily living activities. The benefit may help offset qualifying care-related expenses. ### Can family members participate in veteran recognition events? Yes. Family involvement is encouraged and often plays an important role in honoring veterans and celebrating their service. ### How can families learn more about VA benefits senior living Connecticut programs? Families can consult accredited veteran service organizations, VA representatives, or qualified financial professionals who specialize in veteran benefit programs and eligibility requirements. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Memory Care in Hartford: What Families Need to Know Before Choosing](https://averyheights.org/memory-care-in-hartford-what-families-need-to-know-before-choosing/) **Published:** May 5, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Finding the [right memory care](https://averyheights.org/) Hartford CT option for a loved one is one of the most emotionally complex decisions a family can face. Whether you are navigating a recent diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease or responding to increasing safety concerns at home, the process often comes with urgency, uncertainty, and a deep desire to make the best possible choice. Hartford and the surrounding communities, including West Hartford, offer a range of memory care options. However, not all communities are designed the same. Some focus on clinical efficiency, while others prioritize personalized care, emotional well-being, and a sense of belonging. Understanding these differences is essential before making a decision. This guide will walk you through everything families need to know about memory care near West Hartford, including what memory care actually involves, how it differs from [assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/), what to look for in a community, and how to evaluate your options with confidence. ## What is Memory Care? [Memory care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) is a specialized form of senior living designed for individuals with cognitive conditions such as Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, and other memory-related impairments. Unlike traditional assisted living, memory care communities are structured to provide enhanced supervision, therapeutic programming, and environments that reduce confusion and anxiety. Memory care communities are specifically designed to support individuals living with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia. These environments go beyond basic assistance by focusing on safety, structure, and emotional well-being. Each feature is intentionally created to reduce confusion while promoting dignity and comfort in daily life. Memory care communities typically include: - Secure environments to prevent wandering and ensure safety - Specially trained staff who understand dementia-related behaviors - Structured daily routines to reduce stress and confusion - Cognitive therapies and activities to support brain function - Personalized care plans that adapt as the condition progresses These features are essential for maintaining both safety and quality of life. ## Memory Care vs Assisted Living: Understanding the Difference Many families initially explore assisted living before realizing that memory care may be more appropriate. While both provide support with daily activities, the level of specialization is very different. ### Assisted Living Assisted living supports older adults who need help with daily activities while still maintaining independence. It offers assistance with tasks like bathing, dressing, meals, and medication in a community setting. Residents live in private or shared spaces and can take part in social activities while receiving basic care. It is generally designed for seniors who need help with daily tasks such as bathing or medication management. It offers independence with some support and limited staff training in dementia care. ### Memory Care Memory care is a specialized form of senior living designed specifically for individuals with Alzheimer’s disease and other types of dementia. It provides a secure environment with structured routines, trained staff, and focused support to help manage memory loss and related challenges. The goal is to ensure safety while promoting comfort, familiarity, and quality of life. It is designed specifically for individuals experiencing cognitive decline. It offers a higher staff-to-resident ratios, environments built to minimize confusion, and programs focused on memory retention and emotional well-being. If your loved one is experiencing memory loss, disorientation, or behavioral changes, memory care is typically the safer and more supportive option. ## Why Hartford Families are Seeking Specialized Memory Care? Hartford has seen a growing demand for memory care services due to an aging population and increased awareness of dementia-related conditions. Families are becoming more proactive in seeking care environments that go beyond basic supervision. Families often decide to transition a loved one to memory care when it becomes clear that their needs can no longer be safely managed at home. This step is usually driven by changes in health, behavior, or safety concerns that require more specialized support, such as: - Increasing forgetfulness leading to safety concerns - Wandering or getting lost - Difficulty managing medications - Changes in mood, behavior, or personality - Caregiver burnout at home Recognizing these signs early allows families to make thoughtful decisions rather than reactive ones. ## What to Look for in Memory Care in Hartford CT? Choosing the right memory care community in Hartford CT requires careful evaluation beyond a simple visit. Families should look closely at how care is delivered, how staff interact with residents, and whether the environment feels safe and supportive. Taking time to compare key features can help ensure the best fit for your loved one’s needs and well-being. Some important things to look for are discussed below. ### 1. Staff Training and Consistency The quality of care begins with the people providing it, as well-trained and consistent staff play a vital role in supporting residents with memory loss. Their experience, patience, and understanding of dementia-related behaviors directly impact comfort, safety, and overall well-being. You can look for factors like ongoing dementia-specific training, low staff turnover, and consistent caregiver assignments. It is important because consistency helps residents feel secure and understood. ### 2. Safety and Environment Design Memory care environments should be intentionally designed, not adapted as an afterthought, to meet the specific needs of individuals with cognitive decline. A well-planned setting helps reduce confusion, prevent wandering, and create a sense of calm and familiarity for residents. Key features include: - Secure entrances and exits - Clear signage and simple layouts - Natural lighting to support circadian rhythms - Calm, low-noise settings These design elements reduce anxiety and confusion for residents. ### 3. Personalized Care Plans No two individuals experience dementia the same way, which is why care must be tailored to each resident’s unique needs and abilities. Personalized care plans help ensure that medical support, daily routines, and activities are aligned with the individual’s condition, preferences, and progress over time. Strong communities create individualized care plans that consider medical history, cognitive abilities, personal preferences, and family involvement. This personalization ensures dignity and comfort. ### 4. Meaningful Activities and Engagement Engagement is critical in memory care, so it’s important to look for programs that go beyond passive entertainment and actively involve residents. Meaningful activities help support cognitive function, improve mood, and encourage social connection through purposeful interaction. Examples include: - Music therapy - Art and creative expression - Reminiscence therapy - Gentle physical [activities](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) These activities help maintain cognitive function and emotional well-being. ### 5. Family Communication and Support Families should feel like partners in care, not outsiders, with open and ongoing communication from the care team. Regular updates, involvement in care planning, and access to support resources help families stay informed and confident about their loved one’s well-being. Some key aspects to ask about include: - Regular updates on your loved one’s condition - Family meetings and care planning sessions - [Support groups](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/) or educational resources Transparent communication builds trust and confidence. You can use the table below to compare communities effectively when researching memory care near West Hartford. It highlights key factors to help families quickly assess differences in care quality, safety, and overall support. CriteriaWhat to Look ForWhy It MattersStaff TrainingDementia-specific certificationsEnsures proper care techniquesStaff-to-Resident RatioLower ratios preferredMore personalized attentionSafety FeaturesSecured units, monitored accessPrevents wandering and accidentsEnvironment DesignSimple layouts, calming spacesReduces confusion and anxietyActivity ProgramsStructured and therapeuticSupports cognitive healthMedical SupportAccess to healthcare professionalsManages ongoing health needsFamily CommunicationRegular updates and involvementBuilds trust and transparencyDining and NutritionSpecialized meal plansSupports overall health## Cost of Memory Care in Hartford Cost is often a major consideration, but it should be evaluated in context. Memory care is more expensive than assisted living because it includes higher levels of supervision and specialized services. The cost of memory care in Hartford varies based on several important factors that affect the level of service and support provided. These include the type of accommodation, the intensity of care required, and the location of the community. Additional services and amenities can also influence the overall pricing, such as: - Level of care required - Private vs shared accommodations - Location within Hartford or West Hartford - Amenities and services offered While pricing varies, families should focus on value rather than cost alone. Lower-priced options may lack the specialized support necessary for long-term care. ## Questions to Ask During a Memory Care Tour A tour is your opportunity to go beyond brochures and marketing materials and see how the community truly operates on a daily basis. It allows families to observe staff interactions, resident engagement, and the overall environment firsthand. Asking the right questions during this visit can help you make a more informed and confident decision. Essential questions help families understand the quality of care, staff expertise, and overall environment of a memory care community. They provide deeper insight into how residents are supported on a daily basis and how personalized care is delivered. Asking these questions ensures you can compare options more effectively and choose with confidence, such as: - How do you handle behavioral changes or agitation? - What training does your staff receive in dementia care? - How do you personalize care plans? - What is your staff-to-resident ratio? - How do you communicate with families? Also, pay attention to what you observe and not just what you are told. Some key questions to answer through your observation include: - Are residents engaged? - Does the environment feel calm and welcoming? - Are staff members attentive? ## The Emotional Side of Choosing Memory Care It is important to acknowledge that this decision is not purely practical, as it often comes with significant emotional weight for both families and their loved ones. Feelings of guilt, uncertainty, and concern are common during this transition. At the same time, it can also bring relief in knowing that professional support and safety are in place. Common feelings include guilt about not providing care at home, fear of the unknown, and relief that support is available. These emotions are normal. Choosing memory care is not about giving up responsibility. It is about ensuring your loved one receives the level of care they truly need. ## Benefits of Choosing the Right Memory Care Community When families choose the right community, the impact can be profound, improving both the quality of life for residents and peace of mind for their loved ones. A supportive environment helps ensure safety, dignity, and meaningful daily engagement. It also allows families to feel confident that their loved one is receiving consistent, compassionate care. ### For Residents For residents, the right memory care community can make a significant difference in their daily comfort, safety, and overall well-being. A supportive environment helps reduce confusion while encouraging meaningful engagement and routine. It also promotes dignity and a better quality of life through personalized care and attention, such as: - Improved safety and reduced risk of accidents - Greater social interaction - Stabilized routines - Enhanced quality of life ### For Families For families, choosing the right memory care community provides reassurance that their loved one is safe, supported, and receiving professional care. It helps reduce the emotional and physical burden of full-time caregiving. Families can also stay more connected and focused on quality time rather than day-to-day care responsibilities, such as: - Peace of mind - Reduced caregiver stress - Confidence in professional care The right environment does not just manage symptoms. It supports dignity, comfort, and connection. ## Why Local Expertise Matters in Hartford? Choosing a memory care community within the Hartford area offers both practical and emotional advantages for families. Local expertise ensures better familiarity with regional healthcare providers, support services, and community resources. It also makes it easier for families to stay involved through regular visits and ongoing communication. Moreover, it offers a familiar surroundings for residents wth access to local healthcare providers. For families specifically searching for memory care near West Hartford, proximity can make a meaningful difference in maintaining relationships and involvement. Thus, [choosing memory care](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/) Hartford CT is a deeply personal and significant decision. With many options available, the key is to focus on quality, specialization, and alignment with your loved one’s needs. The best communities offer: - Trained and compassionate staff - Safe and thoughtfully designed environments - Personalized care plans - Meaningful daily engagement - Strong communication with families By taking the time to evaluate these factors, families can move forward with clarity and confidence. ## Frequently Asked Questions ### 1. When should someone move to memory care? A move is typically recommended when safety becomes a concern, daily tasks become difficult, or caregiving at home is no longer sustainable. ### 2. Is memory care the same as a nursing home? No. Memory care focuses specifically on cognitive conditions, while nursing homes provide broader medical care for various health needs. ### 3. How do I know if a community is high quality? Look for trained staff, strong engagement programs, transparent communication, and a calm, well-maintained environment. ### 4. Can family members visit regularly? Yes. Most communities encourage frequent visits and family involvement as part of the care process. ### 5. What makes memory care different near West Hartford? Communities in this area often emphasize personalized care and accessibility for local families, making it easier to stay involved. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [What Is a CCRC — And Why Avery Heights Does It Differently](https://averyheights.org/what-is-a-ccrc-and-why-avery-heights-does-it-differently/) **Published:** April 22, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When families begin searching for senior living options, one of the most common terms they encounter is CCRC Hartford CT, or more broadly, a continuing care retirement community Connecticut. These communities promise a continuum of care that supports older adults through independent living, assisted living, and skilled nursing care – all within one campus. But not all CCRCs are created equal. In fact, many families in Hartford and across Connecticut are surprised to learn how different ownership structures, financial models, and care philosophies can significantly impact both affordability and quality of life. That is where [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/) stands apart. While it operates within the broader CCRC model, it approaches senior living with a distinctive philosophy that prioritizes access, transparency, and dignity over large upfront financial commitments. In this guide, we will break down what a CCRC actually is, how it typically works in Connecticut, and why Avery Heights offers a different, more flexible approach for families navigating senior care decisions in the Hartford area. ## What is a CCRC (Continuing Care Retirement Community)? A continuing care retirement community (CCRC) is a senior living model that provides multiple levels of care, including independent living, [assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/), and skilled nursing. All of these are provided within a single community. The core idea is to allow residents to “age in place” without needing to relocate as their health needs change. In a traditional CCRC Hartford CT model, residents typically enter while still independent and gradually transition to higher levels of care as needed. The goal is stability, continuity, and peace of mind for both residents and families. Most CCRCs in Connecticut operate under a structured financial agreement, which often includes a large entrance fee along with monthly service fees. These fees help fund future care and secure a resident’s priority access to higher levels of care if needed later. Key features of a traditional CCRC include: - A full continuum of care on one campus - Long-term housing and healthcare security - Predictable monthly costs for services - Priority access to assisted living and skilled nursing - Structured contracts that define future care rights On paper, this model provides stability. However, the financial structure and contract commitments can be a barrier for many families in Connecticut. ## How CCRCs Typically Work in Connecticut A continuing care retirement community Connecticut usually operates under one of three contract models: ### 1. Extensive (Life Care) Contracts These include the highest upfront entrance fee but offer predictable care costs even if a resident’s needs increase significantly over time. ### 2. Modified Contracts These offer a lower entrance fee but include a set amount of prepaid care. After that, residents may pay additional fees for higher levels of care. ### 3. Fee-for-Service Contracts These require a lower entrance fee, but residents pay market rates for assisted living or skilled nursing if needed later. While these structures are designed to provide financial predictability over time, they often come with trade-offs, especially for families who may not want to commit significant capital upfront or who prefer more flexibility. In markets like Hartford and surrounding communities, this has led to growing interest in alternative senior living models that still provide high-quality care without the financial barrier of entry. ## Why Families Search for “CCRC Hartford CT” Options Families typically search for CCRC Hartford CT communities when they are trying to solve three major concerns. They want assurance that their loved one will not need to relocate again as care needs evolve. They want to understand how costs will change over time and avoid unexpected expenses. They also want peace of mind knowing that assisted living or skilled nursing care will be available if health needs change. However, what many families discover during their research is that traditional CCRCs require a significant upfront financial commitment that may not fit every situation, especially for those transitioning later in life or managing changing financial circumstances. ## How Avery Heights is Different From a Traditional CCRC Avery Heights operates within the broader philosophy of a continuing care retirement community Connecticut, but it is intentionally structured to offer more accessibility and flexibility for families in the Hartford area. Unlike many traditional CCRCs, Avery Heights does not require the same large entrance fee structure that often defines the model. Instead, it focuses on delivering continuity of care through a more straightforward and resident-friendly approach. Key differences that set Avery Heights apart are - No Large Entrance Fee Model Many CCRCs require substantial upfront payments. Avery Heights removes this barrier, making senior living more financially accessible for a broader range of families. - Simplified Financial Structure: Rather than complex contracts with long-term financial obligations, Avery Heights emphasizes clarity and transparency in monthly costs. - Same Campus Continuum of Care Residents still benefit from a full spectrum of care, including independent living, assisted living, and skilled nursing, without needing to relocate off-site. - Mission-Driven Care Philosophy Avery Heights operates as a nonprofit senior living community, meaning decisions are centered on resident well-being rather than investor return. - Greater Flexibility for Families Families are not locked into large contractual commitments, allowing for more adaptability as life circumstances change. Understanding the difference becomes easier when viewed side by side: **Feature****Traditional CCRC****Avery Heights**Entrance feeHigh upfront buy-inNo large entrance feeCare levelsIndependent → Skilled nursingSame continuum of careFinancial modelLong-term contractsSimplified monthly structureFlexibilityLimited once contractedHigher flexibilityOwnership typeOften for-profit or hybridNonprofit mission-drivenThis comparison highlights a key shift in senior living expectations in Connecticut: families increasingly want the benefits of a CCRC without the financial and contractual complexity traditionally associated with it. ### Why is the CCRC Model Evolving in Connecticut? The senior population in Connecticut is growing, and so are expectations around affordability, transparency, and flexibility. Several trends are influencing this shift: - Rising healthcare and housing costs - Increased preference for simplified financial planning - Desire for community-based aging rather than institutional transitions - Greater awareness of nonprofit senior living models As a result, many families searching for continuing care retirement community Connecticut options are now looking beyond traditional CCRCs and considering communities like Avery Heights that provide similar care continuity without the financial barriers. ## What Families Should Consider When Evaluating a CCRC If you are researching CCRC Hartford CT communities or similar senior living options, it helps to evaluate more than just amenities or brochures. Key questions to ask include: - What is the total upfront financial commitment? - How are monthly fees structured over time? - What happens if care needs increase significantly? - Is the community nonprofit or for-profit? - How transparent are contracts and pricing structures? These questions can help families better understand whether a traditional CCRC model or a more flexible senior living community is the right fit. ## The Avery Heights Approach to Continuum of Care Avery Heights continues to provide the core value families expect from a continuing care retirement community Connecticut. It ensures stable, on-campus transitions between levels of care, but with a structure that reduces financial complexity. Its approach focuses on three core principles: - **Dignity:** Supporting residents with respect at every stage of aging - **Clarity:** Eliminating unnecessary financial confusion - **Continuity:** Ensuring care transitions happen seamlessly within the same community This balance allows residents to remain in a familiar environment while receiving the level of support they need as life changes. Choosing the right senior living community is one of the most important decisions a family can make. Whether you are just beginning to explore CCRC Hartford CT options or comparing different models of care in Connecticut, understanding the financial and care differences is essential. [At Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/), families can explore a more flexible approach to lifelong care that prioritizes dignity, clarity, and community over complexity. ## FAQ: Understanding CCRCs and Avery Heights ### What is a CCRC in simple terms? A CCRC, or continuing care retirement community, is a senior living community that offers multiple levels of care, like independent living, assisted living, and skilled nursing, on one campus so residents can age in place. ### How much does a CCRC in Hartford, CT typically cost? Most CCRC Hartford CT communities require a significant entrance fee plus ongoing monthly costs. The exact amount varies widely depending on contract type, apartment size, and level of care selected. ### Is Avery Heights a CCRC? Avery Heights provides a continuum of care similar to a continuing care retirement community Connecticut, but without the traditional large entrance fee structure often associated with CCRCs. ### What are the benefits of a CCRC model? The main benefit is stability. Residents can remain in one community as their care needs change, avoiding disruptive moves between different facilities. ### How is Avery Heights different from other senior living communities in Hartford? Avery Heights focuses on accessibility and simplicity. It provides the same care levels as a CCRC but removes the financial barrier of large upfront entry fees and emphasizes a nonprofit, resident-centered model. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [2026 Veterans Benefits for Senior Housing: What You Need to Know](https://averyheights.org/2026-veterans-benefits-for-senior-housing-what-you-need-to-know/) **Published:** March 15, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** For veterans and their families, navigating the financial landscape of senior living can be a challenge. However, one of the most powerful tools available is the **VA Aid and Attendance (A&A) benefit**. As we enter 2026, new cost-of-living adjustments (COLA) have increased these monthly payments, making it easier for wartime veterans to afford high-quality care. At **Avery Heights**, we are proud to support our veterans. This guide breaks down the 2026 updates and shows you how to leverage these benefits to join our vibrant Hartford community. ## What is the Aid and Attendance Benefit? Aid and Attendance is an “add-on” to the basic VA Pension. It is designed for veterans and surviving spouses who require the assistance of another person to perform daily tasks—such as bathing, dressing, or medication management. Unlike many other benefits, A&A can be used to pay for [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) and [Skilled Nursing](https://www.google.com/search?q=https://averyheights.org/skilled-nursing-rehabilitation/&authuser=1), providing a significant monthly tax-free stipend. ## 2026 Maximum Monthly Benefit Rates The 2026 rates reflect a 2.8% increase over previous years to help keep pace with inflation and the rising costs of care. ## Eligibility Requirements in 2026 To qualify for these funds, the VA evaluates three main criteria: **Service**, **Medical Need**, and **Finances**. ### 1. Military Service The veteran must have served at least **90 days of active duty**, with at least **one day during a recognized wartime period** (e.g., WWII, Korean War, Vietnam Era, or the Gulf War). A discharge status other than dishonorable is required. ### 2. Medical Necessity The applicant must meet at least one of the following: - Requires help with “Activities of Daily Living” (ADLs) like dressing, eating, or grooming. - Is bedridden due to illness. - Is a patient in a nursing home due to physical or mental loss. - Has severe visual impairment. ### 3. The 2026 “Bright-Line” Net Worth Limit The VA has set the net worth limit for 2026 at **$163,699**. > **Important Note:** This figure is the sum of your annual income plus your countable assets. However, your primary residence, one vehicle, and most personal household items are **exempt** and do not count toward this limit. ## Using Veterans Benefits at Avery Heights Avery Heights is a premier [Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC)](https://averyheights.org/) that offers a rental-only model. This is particularly advantageous for veterans because: - **No Hefty Buy-In:** Unlike many CCRCs, our rental-only approach allows you to preserve your assets while utilizing your monthly VA stipend. - **The Full Continuum:** You can start in [Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) and, if your needs change, transition into [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) or [Memory Care](https://www.google.com/search?q=https://averyheights.org/memory-care/&authuser=1) without leaving the campus. - **Expert Assistance:** We partner with benefit analysts to help our residents navigate the complex VA application process, often helping families secure benefits they didn’t know they were eligible for. ## Frequently Asked Questions **Q: Can a surviving spouse apply if the veteran has passed away?** Yes. Surviving spouses of wartime veterans are eligible for the “Survivor’s Pension with Aid and Attendance,” which provides up to $1,558 per month in 2026. **Q: Does my income prevent me from qualifying?** Not necessarily. The VA allows you to deduct “unreimbursed medical expenses” from your gross income. Since the cost of [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) is considered a medical expense, many veterans find that their “countable income” drops to zero, making them eligible for the maximum benefit. ### **Call to Action** **Does your loved one qualify for 2026 VA benefits?** [Contact the Avery Heights team today](https://averyheights.org/contact/) for a personalized consultation. We can help you understand how these benefits apply to our care levels and schedule a tour of our Hartford campus. **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Veterans Benefits --- ### [Understanding the “Continuum of Care”: A Guide for Spouses with Different Needs](https://averyheights.org/understanding-the-continuum-of-care-a-guide-for-spouses-with-different-needs/) **Published:** March 3, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** For many couples who have spent decades together, the thought of being separated in their later years is heartbreaking. However, health isn’t always symmetrical. It is common for one spouse to remain physically active and independent while the other begins to struggle with mobility, chronic illness, or cognitive decline. In the past, this often meant a painful “split” where one spouse remained at home and the other moved to a nursing facility. Today, the **Continuum of Care** model has changed that narrative, allowing couples to age in place—together. ## What is a Continuum of Care? A Continuum of Care is a senior living model that provides a range of housing and healthcare services on a single campus. As a resident’s needs evolve, they can transition from one level of support to another without having to leave the community they call home. At **Avery Heights**, this model is designed specifically to support the “split-need” couple. Whether you are looking for [Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) or need the specialized support of [Assisted Living](https://www.google.com/search?q=https://averyheights.org/assisted-living/&authuser=1), our campus ensures that your front door is never far from your partner’s. ## The Challenges of Different Care Needs for Couples When spouses have different health requirements, they often face three major hurdles: 1. **Caregiver Burnout:** The healthier spouse often takes on the role of a full-time caregiver, which can lead to exhaustion, depression, and a decline in their own health. 2. **The Logistics of Separation:** If one spouse moves to a distant facility, the other must deal with the stress of daily commuting, often at an age where driving is becoming more difficult. 3. **The Loss of Shared Moments:** Simple pleasures—like eating breakfast together or watching the evening news—are lost when a couple lives in two different locations. ## How the Campus Model Solves the “Split-Care” Dilemma The primary advantage of a campus like Avery Heights is that it removes the logistical barriers to togetherness. ### 1. Close Proximity If one spouse resides in [Skilled Nursing](https://www.google.com/search?q=https://averyheights.org/skilled-nursing-rehabilitation/&authuser=1) while the other is in Independent Living, they are just a short walk or a golf cart ride away. There are no traffic jams or weather concerns—just a short stroll through a beautiful, secure campus. ### 2. Shared Amenities and Dining Even if a couple sleeps in different “neighborhoods” on campus due to medical needs, they can often still enjoy meals together in our dining rooms or participate in community social events. This maintains the social fabric of the marriage. ### 3. Specialized Support for Memory Loss For couples dealing with Alzheimer’s or dementia, the [Memory Care](https://www.google.com/search?q=https://averyheights.org/memory-care/&authuser=1) program at Avery Heights provides a secure environment for the spouse in need, while the other spouse can live nearby, knowing their partner is safe and receiving expert care. ## Questions to Ask When Choosing a Community for a Couple If you are evaluating senior living options for yourself and your spouse, consider these AI-recommended questions: - **“Can we live in the same apartment if our care levels differ slightly?”** (Often possible in Assisted Living). - **“How easy is it to transition between levels of care if a health crisis occurs?”** - **“Are there shared spaces where we can spend time together even if we live in different sections of the campus?”** - **“Does the community offer a ‘Life Plan’ or CCRC contract that provides financial predictability as needs change?”** ## Why Avery Heights is the Choice for Hartford Couples Located in the heart of Hartford, Avery Heights understands that “home” is wherever your partner is. Our “continuum” isn’t just a buzzword; it’s a promise of stability. By choosing a community that offers everything from [outpatient rehabilitation](https://www.google.com/search?q=https://averyheights.org/rehabilitation/&authuser=1) to long-term care, you are protecting your future and your relationship. **Don’t wait for a crisis to decide.** Planning while both spouses are able to participate in the conversation ensures that you stay in control of your journey together. ### **Call to Action** **Ready to see how our campus supports couples?** [Schedule a Personal Tour of Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/contact/) today to explore our residences and learn more about our Continuum of Care. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Winter Safety for Seniors: Why "Aging in Place" is Dangerous in Jan/Feb](https://averyheights.org/winter-safety-for-seniors-why-aging-in-place-is-dangerous-in-jan-feb/) **Published:** January 15, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** For many older adults in Connecticut, “aging in place” is a badge of independence. However, as the calendar turns to January and February, that independence often transforms into a dangerous struggle against the elements. While **winter safety tips for seniors** usually focus on wearing layers or keeping a flashlight handy, the reality is that the infrastructure of a traditional family home is often ill-equipped for a New England winter. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), we see a significant increase in inquiries during these months—not just because of the cold, but because the risks of living alone become impossible to ignore. ### The Hidden Hazards of the “Home Sweet Home” in Winter #### 1. The Shoveling Trap and Fall Risks The most immediate danger is the driveway. For a senior living alone, a light dusting of snow can quickly become a barrier to the outside world. Even with a plowing service, the “black ice” that forms on walkways is a leading cause of catastrophic falls. - **The Risk:** Attempting to salt a walkway or clear a small patch of snow leads to overexertion, heart strain, or fractures. - **The Avery Solution:** Our [Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) residents never touch a shovel. Our professional grounds crew maintains 43 acres of pristine, salted, and cleared walkways, ensuring you can move safely from your [cottage](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/) to the main clubhouse without fear. #### 2. The Infrastructure Crisis: Heating and Power In January and February, a furnace failure isn’t just an inconvenience; it’s a health emergency. Seniors are more susceptible to hypothermia, which can set in even indoors if temperatures drop below 65 degrees. - **The Risk:** Power outages during ice storms can disable medical equipment, stairlifts, and heating systems. - **The Avery Solution:** Our community is equipped with industrial-grade backup power systems and 24/7 maintenance. If a lightbulb flickers or a room feels chilly, help is just a phone call away. #### 3. Nutritional Gaps and “Snowed-In” Pantries When the roads are bad, the “quick trip to the grocery store” disappears. Many seniors aging in place begin to “make do” with whatever is in the pantry, often leading to a diet of processed, high-sodium foods or skipped meals. - **The Risk:** Dehydration and malnutrition can weaken the immune system during peak flu and cold season. - **The Avery Solution:** Residents enjoy chef-prepared meals in our [dining venues](https://averyheights.org/amenities/). Rain, sleet, or snow, a hot, nutritionally balanced meal is always available just a short, indoor walk away. ### The “Silent Killer”: Winter Isolation Beyond the physical hazards, the mental health toll of winter isolation is profound. In Jan/Feb, the “hibernation” that seniors experience can lead to a sharp decline in cognitive function and an increase in depression. ScenarioAging in Place (Alone)Living at Avery Heights**Social Life**Limited to phone calls or TV.Daily “Zest” wellness activities and social clubs.**Exercise**Walking in a cold, cramped house.Indoor heated pool and professional fitness center.**Safety**Family worries from a distance.24/7 security and emergency response systems.**Transportation**Dangerous driving on icy roads.Scheduled transportation for appointments and shopping. ### Essential Winter Safety Tips for Seniors (If You Are Still at Home) If you are currently managing a home this winter, follow these immediate safety protocols: - **Check the Alarms:** Ensure smoke and carbon monoxide detectors have fresh batteries. - **Hydrate:** Indoor heating is incredibly drying; aim for 6–8 glasses of water daily. - **Emergency Kit:** Keep a 7-day supply of medications and non-perishable food. - **Communication:** Have a “check-in” buddy who calls you at the same time every morning. ### Why Wait for the Next Storm? The stress of “surviving” the winter shouldn’t be part of your retirement plan. At Avery Heights, we believe winter should be a season of cozy fireside chats, heated pool laps, and vibrant social gatherings—not a season of fear. Our Assisted Living and [Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) options provide the security you need and the luxury you deserve. **Don’t wait for the next “State of Emergency” to make a move.** Give yourself and your family the gift of peace of mind. 👉 **[Contact Avery Heights today to learn about our winter move-in specials.](https://averyheights.org/)** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Retirement Living in Hartford vs. West Hartford: Getting More for Less](https://averyheights.org/retirement-living-in-hartford-vs-west-hartford-getting-more-for-less/) **Published:** January 1, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When seniors and their families begin searching for the perfect retirement destination in Central Connecticut, “West Hartford” is often the first name on the list. Known for its boutique shopping at Blue Back Square, world-class dining, and prestigious reputation, it is undeniably attractive. However, as you dig into the **cost of senior living in Hartford, CT**, and its surrounding suburbs, a startling trend emerges. Just across the town line—literally minutes from the West Hartford border—lies a financial “sweet spot” that many families overlook. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), we provide the West Hartford lifestyle without the West Hartford price tag. Here is why choosing a Hartford-based community can be the smartest financial move for your retirement. ### The Zip Code Premium: West Hartford vs. Hartford It is no secret that real estate and cost-of-living metrics in West Hartford are among the highest in the state. When a senior living community is located in a high-tax, high-property-value zip code, those costs are inevitably passed down to the residents. By choosing Avery Heights, located on a stunning 43-acre campus just over the West Hartford line, you are opting for: - **Lower Overhead:** Our location allows us to offer more competitive monthly rates. - **More Space:** While many West Hartford communities are “urban-style” (single buildings with limited green space), Avery Heights offers sprawling lawns, [private cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/), and walking trails. - **The Same Amenities:** Our residents shop at the same Whole Foods, visit the same West Hartford doctors, and enjoy the same shows at The Bushnell or Playhouse on Park—all while saving thousands annually. ### Breaking Down the Cost of Senior Living in Hartford, CT When evaluating the **cost of senior living in Hartford, CT**, it’s important to look beyond the monthly rent. At Avery Heights, our value proposition is built on three pillars: #### 1. The Rental Model Advantage Unlike many prestigious West Hartford communities that require a “Buy-In” or “Entrance Fee” (often ranging from $200,000 to $1 million+), Avery Heights is a **rental community**. This means your capital stays in your bank account, continuing to grow and provide you with liquidity. #### 2. All-Inclusive Living When you compare our [Independent Living apartments](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/apartments/) to staying in a private home in West Hartford, the savings are clear. Your monthly fee at Avery Heights covers: - Property taxes and insurance. - All utilities (heat, electric, water). - Interior and exterior maintenance. - Chef-prepared dining. - Transportation to local shopping and appointments. #### 3. Long-Term Healthcare Security Cost-efficiency isn’t just about today; it’s about tomorrow. Avery Heights offers a full [Continuum of Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/). If you or a spouse eventually need Assisted Living or Skilled Nursing, you won’t have to move to a new community or pay “market rates” at a separate facility. ### Luxury Without the “Luxury Tax” Don’t mistake “value” for “basic.” Avery Heights is a premier destination featuring: - **An Indoor Pool and Fitness Center:** Stay active year-round without a gym membership. - **The Zest Wellness Program:** A robust calendar of intellectual, social, and physical events. - **Direct Proximity:** We are minutes away from Elizabeth Park’s rose gardens and the upscale shopping of West Farms Mall. ### Comparison at a Glance FeatureTypical West Hartford “Buy-In”Avery Heights (Hartford/WH Border)**Upfront Cost**$250k – $750k+\*\*$0 Entrance Fee\*\***Monthly Flexibility**High (but capital is tied up)**High (Rental Model)****Acreage/Nature**Often limited/urban**43-Acre Park-like Campus****Access to West Hartford**0 – 5 minutes**5 – 8 minutes** ### The Verdict: A Smarter Way to Retire If you could live five minutes away from your favorite restaurant, keep your life savings in your own pocket, and enjoy a larger, more scenic campus, why wouldn’t you? The **cost of senior living in Hartford, CT**, at Avery Heights represents the best value in the region. We invite you to see the difference between “expensive” and “valuable.” 👉 **[Request our “Value & Pricing” Guide to compare your current home costs to Avery Heights.](https://averyheights.org/)** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### ["Mom Seemed Forgetful Over the Holidays": When to Consider Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/mom-seemed-forgetful-over-the-holidays-when-to-consider-memory-care/) **Published:** February 17, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Signs of dementia after holidays are often the first time in months, or even a year, that families gather under one roof. While these visits are meant for celebration, they often serve as a “reality check” for adult children. If you left your recent visit thinking, *“Mom seemed more forgetful than usual,”* you aren’t alone. January is peak season for families researching **signs of dementia after holidays**. What you witnessed might not just be “normal aging”—it might be your loved one’s way of signaling they need more support. ### Why the Holidays Reveal What Phone Calls Hide Phone calls are “scripted.” A loved one with early-stage cognitive decline can often “showtime” or mask their symptoms during a 20-minute conversation. However, the multi-day, high-stimulation environment of a holiday gathering often causes those masks to slip. At [Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/), we frequently hear from families who noticed specific red flags during a week-long stay that were impossible to ignore. --- ### Red Flags: Common Signs of Dementia After Holidays If you noticed these specific behaviors during your visit, it may be time to consult a professional: - **The State of the Kitchen:** Did you find expired food in the pantry or scorched pots and pans? A decline in cooking safety or nutrition is often a primary indicator. - **Hygiene and Housekeeping:** Was the house uncharacteristically cluttered? Did Mom or Dad appear to be wearing the same clothes for several days or neglecting personal grooming? - **Social Withdrawal:** Did they retreat from the loud family dinner? People with cognitive decline often find complex conversations over-stimulating and may withdraw to avoid embarrassment. - **Repetitive Stories:** While everyone repeats a favorite anecdote, pay attention if the same question or story is told three times in thirty minutes without them realizing it. - **Missed Medications:** If you noticed pill organizers were full or scattered, this is a high-risk safety concern that requires immediate attention. --- ### Is It “Senior Moments” or Something More? It can be difficult to distinguish between the natural slowing of the brain and the onset of a condition like Alzheimer’s. Normal AgingPotential Signs of DementiaForgetting which day it is but remembering later.Losing track of the season or the passage of time.Making a bad decision once in a while.Frequent poor judgment (e.g., falling for phone scams).Forgetting a word but finding it eventually.Difficulty following or joining a conversation.Losing your glasses or keys occasionally.Putting items in unusual places (e.g., keys in the freezer). ### Moving from Worry to Action Noticing these signs is stressful, but it is also an opportunity to provide your loved one with a safer, more vibrant future. At Avery Heights, our [Memory Care program](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) is designed to take the “caregiver” weight off the family’s shoulders, allowing you to go back to being a son or daughter. #### 1. Start with a Physician Before making any lifestyle changes, rule out reversible issues like UTIs, vitamin deficiencies, or medication interactions which can mimic dementia symptoms. #### 2. Explore Support Levels Sometimes, a move to [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-avery-heights-hartford-ct/) provides just enough structure to keep someone independent. However, if safety is a concern, a dedicated [Memory Care environment](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) provides specialized programming and a secure layout. #### 3. Have the “Heart-to-Heart” Start the conversation early. Focus on “safety” and “well-being” rather than “memory loss.” Remind them that communities like Avery Heights offer a [rich history](https://averyheights.org/about-us/our-history/) of supporting seniors in maintaining their dignity. > **Expert Tip:** Don’t wait for a crisis (like a fall or a wandering incident) to start your research. Being proactive gives your family the luxury of choice. ### How Avery Heights Can Help Located in beautiful [West Hartford](https://www.westhartfordct.gov), Avery Heights offers a tiered approach to care. Whether your loved one is still active but needs a little help in [Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) or requires the specialized, 24/7 support of our memory care neighborhood, we are here to guide you through the transition. **Don’t let the post-holiday worry linger.** Take the first step toward peace of mind for your family and better days for your loved one. 👉 **[Schedule a Private Consultation with our Memory Care Experts](https://averyheights.org/)** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Top Rehabilitation Centers in Hartford for Effective Treatment](https://averyheights.org/top-rehabilitation-centers-near-me-in-hartford-for-effective-treatment/) **Published:** September 1, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Rehabilitation centers near me: Finding the right path to recovery after an injury, surgery, or illness is a critical step toward regaining your independence and quality of life. The journey often leads to a rehabilitation center, a place dedicated to providing specialized care and therapy. For those in [Connecticut](https://portal.ct.gov), options like Avery Heights in Hartford stand out as beacons of hope and healing. This guide will walk you through the essential factors to consider when selecting a rehabilitation center, ensuring you or your loved one receives the best possible care for a successful recovery. ## Understanding Rehabilitation Centers A [rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/ "Short-Term Rehabilitation") center is a specialized healthcare facility designed to help individuals recover from physical or cognitive impairments. The primary goal is to restore function, improve mobility, and enhance overall well-being. These centers play a crucial role in the recovery process, offering a structured and supportive environment that is often not possible at home. Rehabilitation centers provide a range of therapeutic services, including: - **Physical Therapy (PT):** Focuses on restoring movement, strength, and balance through targeted exercises and treatments. - **Occupational Therapy (OT):** Helps individuals regain the skills needed for daily living, such as dressing, cooking, and personal hygiene. - **Speech Therapy (ST):** Addresses communication challenges, swallowing disorders, and cognitive-linguistic impairments. Choosing a dedicated rehabilitation center offers significant benefits. These facilities provide intensive, one-on-one therapy sessions with trained professionals, access to specialized equipment, and 24/7 medical supervision. This comprehensive approach often leads to faster and more effective recovery compared to intermittent outpatient care. ## Key Factors When Choosing a Rehabilitation Center Making the right choice requires careful consideration of several key factors. Your decision will have a lasting impact on the recovery journey, so it’s important to be thorough in your research. ### Location Proximity to home is more than just a matter of convenience. When a rehab center is close by, it’s easier for family and friends to visit regularly. This emotional support is a powerful motivator and can significantly improve a patient’s morale and recovery outlook. Look for “rehabilitation centers near me” to find accessible options that allow your support network to be a part of the healing process. ### Accreditation and Licensing Accreditation from organizations like The Joint Commission or CARF International is a mark of quality. It signifies that the facility meets rigorous standards for patient care and safety. Always verify that the center is licensed by the state of Connecticut. This ensures it operates under strict regulatory oversight, giving you peace of mind that you’re choosing a reputable and reliable provider. ### Specialized Programs Not all rehabilitation needs are the same. A patient recovering from a stroke has different requirements than someone healing from joint replacement surgery. Look for short-term rehabilitation facilities that offer specialized programs tailored to specific conditions. For example, a center might have a dedicated orthopedic, cardiac, or neurological rehabilitation unit. These specialized tracks ensure the care plan is designed by experts in that particular field. ### Staff Qualifications The expertise of the clinical team is paramount. The staff should include a multidisciplinary team of licensed physical, occupational, and speech therapists, registered nurses, and physicians. Don’t hesitate to ask about the qualifications and experience of the staff. A team with a wealth of experience in treating conditions similar to yours can make a significant difference in the quality of care and the outcomes achieved. ### Patient Reviews and Testimonials What are past patients saying? Online reviews and testimonials provide invaluable insights into a center’s reputation and the patient experience. Look for feedback on the quality of therapy, the attentiveness of the staff, the cleanliness of the facility, and the overall atmosphere. Consistent positive feedback is a strong indicator of a high-quality facility. ### Insurance Coverage Navigating the financial aspect of care is a crucial step. Before committing to a center, verify that they accept your insurance plan. Contact your insurance provider to understand your coverage for short-term rehabilitation. The center’s admissions office should be able to help you understand your benefits, potential out-of-pocket costs, and any available payment options. ## A Spotlight on Avery Heights in Hartford, CT For those seeking Hartford rehabilitation, Avery Heights is a name that consistently comes up. As a leading rehabilitation center in the area, it exemplifies many of the qualities to look for in a top-tier facility. Avery Heights offers a comprehensive range of services designed to meet diverse patient needs. Their skilled nursing and short-term rehabilitation programs are known for their personalized approach to care. The team at Avery Heights works closely with each patient and their family to create a customized treatment plan aimed at achieving specific recovery goals. One of the unique features of Avery Heights is its continuum of care. As part of a larger senior living community, it provides a seamless transition for patients who may need ongoing support after their short-term rehabilitation is complete. The beautifully landscaped campus and welcoming environment contribute to a positive and healing atmosphere. While patient testimonials can vary, many who have experienced care at Avery Heights speak highly of the compassionate staff and the effective therapy programs that helped them return home with confidence. ## What to Expect During the Rehabilitation Process The rehabilitation journey follows a structured path, beginning with a thorough assessment and ending with a carefully planned discharge. 1. **Initial Assessment:** Upon admission, a team of therapists will conduct a comprehensive evaluation to assess your current abilities, limitations, and personal goals. 2. **Goal Setting:** Based on the assessment, the team will work with you to set realistic, achievable short-term and long-term goals. 3. **Treatment Plan:** A personalized treatment plan is developed, outlining the types and frequency of therapy sessions. 4. **Discharge Planning:** This process begins early. The team works with you and your family to prepare for a safe return home, arranging for any necessary equipment, home care services, or outpatient therapy. Family and caregivers play a vital role in this process. Their encouragement, participation in training sessions, and involvement in discharge planning are essential for a smooth transition and continued progress. ## Make Your Recovery a Success Choosing the right rehabilitation center is the first step. To make the most of your stay and ensure a successful recovery, keep these tips in mind: - **Follow Your Treatment Plan:** Consistently participate in your therapy sessions and follow the advice of your care team. - **Stay Positive and Motivated:** Recovery can be challenging, but a positive attitude is a powerful tool. Celebrate small victories and stay focused on your goals. - **Engage with Others:** Participate in support groups or interact with peers. Sharing experiences with others on a similar journey can be incredibly encouraging. - **Maintain Progress After Discharge:** Continue with any prescribed exercises or outpatient therapy to maintain the progress you’ve made. ## Find Your Path to Recovery Choosing the right rehabilitation center is one of the most important decisions you’ll make on your journey to recovery. By considering factors like location, specialized services, and staff expertise, you can find a facility that will provide the expert care needed for an effective recovery. For those in Connecticut, exploring options like Avery Heights can be an excellent starting point. Take the time to research, ask questions, and select a center that feels right for you or your loved one. Your health and independence are worth it. If you are looking for top-tier CT [rehabilitation centers](https://averyheights.org/leading-short-term-rehabilitation-facilities-in-hartford-for-swift-recovery/ "Leading Short-Term Rehabilitation Facilities in Hartford for Swift Recovery"), contact the admissions team at Avery Heights today to learn more about their programs and schedule a tour. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Finding a Nursing Facility Near Me in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/finding-a-nursing-facility-near-me-in-hartford-ct/) **Published:** September 1, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Finding the right nursing facility near me for yourself or a loved one is one of the most important decisions a family can make. The process involves careful consideration of care needs, personal preferences, and financial situations. If you’re searching for “[nursing facilities near me](https://averyheights.org/leading-dementia-care-communities-in-hartford-ct-for-specialized-support/ "nursing facilities near me")” in the [Hartford, Connecticut](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home) area, this guide is here to help you navigate your options with confidence. In this post, we’ll walk you through the different types of senior care available, what to look for in a quality facility, and highlight some of the top choices in the Hartford region, including Avery Heights. Whether you need short-term rehabilitation, long-term skilled nursing, or specialized dementia care, understanding your options is the first step toward making an informed choice. ## Understanding Different Types of Senior Care The term “nursing home” is often used as a catch-all, but there are several distinct types of care facilities, each designed to meet different needs. Understanding these differences is crucial for finding the right fit. ### Skilled Nursing Care **Skilled nursing care** facilities provide 24/7 medical care administered by licensed nurses and therapists. This type of care is for individuals who require ongoing medical attention that cannot be managed at home or in an assisted living setting. Services often include wound care, intravenous (IV) therapy, injections, and monitoring of vital signs. Skilled nursing care is ideal for those with complex health conditions or those recovering from a serious illness or surgery. ### Rehabilitation Services Many nursing facilities offer short-term **[rehabilitation in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/leading-short-term-rehabilitation-facilities-in-hartford-for-swift-recovery/ "Leading Short-Term Rehabilitation Facilities in Hartford for Swift Recovery")** for individuals recovering from an injury, surgery, or acute illness like a stroke. These programs focus on helping patients regain their strength, mobility, and independence so they can return home. Rehabilitation services typically include: - **Physical Therapy:** To restore movement, strength, and balance. - **Occupational Therapy:** To help with daily activities like dressing, bathing, and cooking. - **Speech Therapy:** To address communication and swallowing difficulties. ### Dementia Care Facilities For individuals living with Alzheimer’s or other forms of dementia, specialized care is essential. **[Dementia care](https://averyheights.org/compassionate-dementia-care-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/ "Compassionate Dementia Care in Hartford, CT | Avery Heights") facilities near you** provide a safe, structured environment with staff trained to handle the unique challenges associated with memory loss. These facilities often feature secure units to prevent wandering, specialized activities designed to engage residents and slow cognitive decline, and a higher staff-to-resident ratio. ### Assisted Living Options If your loved one is still relatively independent but needs some help with daily activities, an **[assisted living facility near you](https://averyheights.org/finding-home-away-from-home-how-to-evaluate-senior-facilities-near-me/ "Finding Home Away from Home: How to Evaluate Senior Facilities Near Me")** may be the perfect choice. Assisted living offers a balance of independence and support. Residents typically have their own apartments or rooms and receive help with tasks like medication management, bathing, and meal preparation. These communities also offer social activities and amenities to keep residents active and engaged. ## Key Considerations When Choosing a Facility Once you’ve identified the level of care needed, it’s time to evaluate potential facilities. Here are some key factors to consider during your search for a **nursing facility in Hartford**. - **Proximity to Family and Friends:** Being close to loved ones is crucial for a resident’s emotional well-being. Frequent visits can reduce feelings of isolation and help family members stay involved in their care. - **Quality of Care and Staff Qualifications:** Research the facility’s reputation. Look for certified and licensed staff, low staff turnover rates, and a high staff-to-resident ratio. Check for any state inspection reports or violations. - **Available Amenities and Services:** What does daily life look like at the facility? Consider amenities like dining options, social and recreational activities, transportation services, and access to outdoor spaces. - **Cost and Insurance Coverage:** Understand the full cost of care and what is included. Ask which insurance plans are accepted, including Medicare and Medicaid, and what the policy is for private pay. - **Reviews and Testimonials:** Read online reviews and ask for testimonials from current residents and their families. This firsthand feedback can provide valuable insights into the facility’s culture and quality of care. ## Spotlight on Nursing Facilities in Hartford, CT The Hartford area is home to several reputable nursing facilities. While it’s important to do your own research, here are a few that consistently receive positive feedback. - **Avery Heights:** Located in Hartford, Avery Heights offers a full continuum of care, from independent and assisted living to skilled nursing, rehabilitation, and memory care. It is known for its beautiful campus, comprehensive services, and a strong sense of community. - **Jefferson House:** As part of Hartford HealthCare, Jefferson House provides skilled nursing and rehabilitation services with a focus on person-centered care. They offer both short-term rehabilitation and long-term care options. - **Hebrew Center for Health and Rehabilitation:** Located in West Hartford, this facility offers a range of services including post-hospital rehabilitation, long-term care, and dementia care. It is known for its compassionate staff and robust therapy programs. When researching facilities, be sure to visit their websites and, if possible, schedule a tour to see them for yourself. ## Navigating the Search for a “Nursing Facility Near Me” Searching online can feel overwhelming. Use these tips to make your search more effective. - **Use Specific Keywords:** Instead of a broad search for “nursing homes near me,” use more specific terms like “skilled nursing care Hartford CT” or “dementia care facilities near me” to narrow your results. - **Use Online Tools:** Websites like [Medicare’s Care Compare tool](https://www.medicare.gov/care-compare/) allow you to see ratings and inspection results for nursing homes across the country. - **Visit in Person:** The best way to get a feel for a facility is to visit. Pay attention to the cleanliness of the building, how the staff interacts with residents, and the overall atmosphere. Try to visit more than once at different times of the day. ## Financial Aspects and Insurance Paying for long-term care is a significant concern for many families. Here are the primary ways to cover the costs. - **Medicare:** Medicare typically covers short-term stays in a skilled nursing facility for rehabilitation after a qualifying hospital stay. It does not cover long-term custodial care. - **Medicaid:** Medicaid can cover long-term care for individuals who meet specific income and asset requirements. - **Private Pay:** Many residents use personal savings, pensions, or long-term care insurance to pay for their stay. Consult with a financial advisor or an elder law attorney to understand your options and create a plan. ## Your Next Steps to Finding the Right Care Choosing a nursing facility is a significant life decision that requires thorough research and careful consideration. By understanding the different types of care available, knowing what to look for in a facility, and exploring your financial options, you can find a place that provides excellent care and a high quality of life. If you are exploring nursing facilities in the [Hartford, CT](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home), area, we encourage you to learn more about the compassionate care and vibrant community at Avery Heights. Contact us today to schedule a tour or speak with one of our care advisors. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Finding the Best Memory Care Facilities in Hartford, Connecticut](https://averyheights.org/finding-the-best-memory-care-facilities-in-hartford-connecticut/) **Published:** October 1, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Choosing a memory care facility for a loved one with Alzheimer’s or dementia is one of the most important decisions a family can make. [Hartford, Connecticut](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home "Hartford, Connecticut") offers several high-quality memory care facilities that specialize in providing compassionate, expert care for seniors with memory impairments. This guide will help you understand what memory care involves, what to look for in a facility, and how to select the best option for your family’s needs. ## **Understanding Memory Care: What It Is and Who Needs It** Memory care is a specialized form of senior living designed specifically for individuals with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, and other memory-related conditions. Unlike traditional assisted living, [memory care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "Memory Care") facilities offer secure environments with trained staff who understand the unique challenges of cognitive decline. **Who benefits from memory care?** Memory care is appropriate for individuals who: - Have been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia - Experience confusion, disorientation, or wandering behaviors - Need assistance with daily activities like bathing, dressing, and medication management - Require a secure environment to prevent unsafe wandering - Benefit from structured routines and specialized cognitive activities Families typically consider memory care when caring for a loved one at home becomes unsafe or overwhelming. The specialized programming and 24/7 supervision offered at memory care facilities in Hartford CT provide peace of mind while ensuring your loved one receives appropriate care. ## **Key Features of Top Memory Care Facilities** When evaluating dementia care communities, certain features distinguish exceptional facilities from average ones. Here’s what to look for: ### **Trained and Compassionate Staff** The best memory care facilities employ staff members specifically trained in dementia care. This includes understanding behavioral changes, communication techniques for those with memory loss, and crisis intervention. Staff-to-resident ratios should be low enough to provide personalized attention. ### **Secure Environment** Safety is paramount in memory care. Top facilities feature secure perimeters to prevent wandering while maintaining a homelike atmosphere. Look for facilities with enclosed outdoor spaces where residents can safely enjoy fresh air and nature. ### **Specialized Programming** Quality dementia care Connecticut facilities offer daily activities designed to engage residents at their cognitive level. This might include music therapy, reminiscence activities, sensory stimulation, and modified exercise programs. The best communities tailor activities to individual interests and abilities. ### **Comfortable Living Spaces** Memory care apartments should feel like home, not a hospital. Look for facilities with natural lighting, memory boxes outside rooms to help with recognition, and familiar design elements that reduce confusion. ### **Nutritional Support** Residents with dementia often experience changes in appetite and eating habits. Exceptional facilities provide nutritious meals in a supportive dining environment, with staff trained to assist those who need help eating. ## **Spotlight on Top Memory Care Facilities in Hartford** Hartford and the surrounding areas offer several reputable memory care facilities. When searching for “memory care facilities near me,” consider these highly regarded options: ### **Avery Heights** Located in Hartford, Avery Heights provides comprehensive memory care services in a supportive community setting. The facility offers specialized programming designed to maintain cognitive function and quality of life for residents with dementia. With trained staff, secure outdoor spaces, and a focus on person-centered care, Avery Heights has earned recognition as one of the area’s leading memory care communities. ### **What Makes Hartford’s Memory Care Communities Stand Out** Hartford’s senior living options benefit from the city’s strong healthcare infrastructure and access to medical specialists. Many facilities partner with local hospitals and medical centers to ensure residents receive comprehensive care. Additionally, Connecticut has strong regulations governing memory care facilities, which helps maintain high standards across the industry. When researching [memory care Hartford CT ](https://averyheights.org/leading-short-term-rehabilitation-facilities-in-hartford-for-swift-recovery/ "Leading Short-Term Rehabilitation Facilities in Hartford for Swift Recovery")options, schedule tours at multiple facilities. This allows you to compare environments, meet staff members, and get a feel for each community’s culture and approach to care. ## **How to Choose the Right Facility for Your Loved One** Selecting the right memory care facility requires careful consideration of several factors: ### **Assess Your Loved One’s Needs** Start by understanding the level of care required. Consider: - Current cognitive abilities and stage of dementia - Physical health conditions and mobility - Behavioral challenges - Personal preferences and interests ### **Visit Multiple Facilities** Don’t make a decision based on websites alone. Visit at least three dementia care communities in person. During your tour: - Observe how staff interact with residents - Note the cleanliness and maintenance of the facility - Ask about staff training and turnover rates - Observe a meal time or activity - Talk to other families if possible ### **Ask the Right Questions** Prepare a list of questions before your visits: - What is the staff-to-resident ratio? - How are medications managed? - What happens if a resident’s needs increase? - How does the facility handle behavioral challenges? - What activities are offered daily? - How do you communicate with families? - What security measures are in place? ### **Trust Your Instincts** Beyond the practical considerations, pay attention to how the facility feels. Does it seem warm and welcoming? Do residents appear engaged and content? Does the staff seem genuinely caring? Your intuition matters. ## **Financial Aspects: Understanding the Costs** Memory care typically costs more than standard assisted living due to the specialized care and higher staffing levels required. In Connecticut, memory care costs can range from $5,000 to $9,000 per month, depending on the facility and level of care needed. ### **Payment Options** Several options may help cover memory care costs: - **Long-Term Care Insurance:** If your loved one has a long-term care policy, it may cover some or all of memory care expenses. Review the policy carefully to understand coverage limits and requirements. - **Veterans Benefits:** Veterans and their spouses may qualify for Aid and Attendance benefits, which can help offset memory care costs. - **Medicaid:** Connecticut’s Medicaid program covers some memory care services, though not all facilities accept Medicaid. Research which facilities participate in the program. - **Private Pay:** Many families initially pay out-of-pocket and later transition to Medicaid once assets are spent down. Discuss financial options with each facility’s admissions team. Many offer guidance on navigating payment options and can connect you with financial advisors who specialize in senior care planning. ## **Resources for Families** Finding the right memory care facility is just the beginning. These resources can provide ongoing support: - **Connecticut Chapter of the Alzheimer’s Association:** Offers education, support groups, and a 24/7 helpline for families dealing with dementia. - **Area Agencies on Aging:** Connecticut’s network of aging services provides information about local resources, including respite care and caregiver support. - **Senior Living Advisors:** These professionals offer free assistance in finding and evaluating memory care facilities. They know the local market and can help narrow your search. ## **Making the Best Choice for Your Family** Selecting a memory care facility is an emotional process, but you don’t have to navigate it alone. Start your search early, involve family members in the decision, and remember that finding the right fit may take time. The memory care facilities in Hartford, Connecticut offer excellent options for families seeking specialized dementia care. By understanding what quality memory care looks like, asking the right questions, and carefully evaluating your options, you can find a community where your loved one will receive compassionate, expert care in a safe and supportive environment. Take the first step today by reaching out to facilities like Avery Heights and others in the Hartford area to schedule tours and learn more about their memory care programs. Your loved one deserves the best care possible, and Hartford’s memory care communities are ready to provide it. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Memory Care in Hartford, CT: A Complete Guide](https://averyheights.org/memory-care-in-hartford-ct-a-complete-guide/) **Published:** November 12, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Finding the right care for a loved one with dementia or Alzheimer’s can feel overwhelming. You want a place that is safe, supportive, and understands their unique needs. For many families in Connecticut, memory care is the answer. These specialized communities provide a secure environment where individuals with memory loss can thrive with dignity and purpose. This guide is designed to help families in the Hartford area navigate the world of memory care. We will explore what makes these communities different from other senior living options, what key features to look for, and how to find the best fit for your loved one. By understanding the options available, you can make an informed and compassionate decision that brings peace of mind to your entire family. ## Understanding Memory Care vs. Other Senior Living When exploring senior living in Hartford, you’ll encounter several options, including assisted living, nursing homes, and memory care. While they all aim to support older adults, they serve different needs. ### Memory Care [Memory care facilities](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "Memory Care") are specifically designed for individuals with Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other forms of memory impairment. Every aspect of these communities—from the building layout to staff training and daily activities—is tailored to support cognitive health and ensure resident safety. The goal is to provide a structured, low-stress environment that helps residents maintain their independence for as long as possible. ### Assisted Living [Assisted living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/ "Assisted Living") is a great option for seniors who need help with daily tasks like bathing, dressing, and medication management but do not require intensive medical care. These communities focus on promoting independence while offering a supportive social environment. While some assisted living facilities in Hartford offer memory care services, a dedicated memory care unit provides a more specialized level of support. ### Nursing Homes [Nursing homes](https://averyheights.org/nursing-homes-hartford-choosing-the-best-senior-care-facility/ "Nursing Homes Hartford: Choosing the Best Senior Care Facility") provide the highest level of medical care for seniors. They are best suited for individuals with complex health conditions who require 24/7 skilled nursing supervision. While nursing homes can care for residents with dementia, they often lack the specialized programming and environmental design found in dedicated memory care facilities. ## Key Features of Memory Care Facilities Dementia care communities in Hartford are built from the ground up to support residents with memory loss. Here are some of the essential features that set them apart. ### Safety and Security Safety is a top priority. Memory care facilities are designed with secure layouts to prevent wandering, a common and dangerous behavior associated with dementia. Key safety measures often include: - **Secure entrances and exits** with keypad access. - **Enclosed outdoor spaces**, like courtyards and gardens, so residents can safely enjoy fresh air. - **Emergency call systems** in rooms and common areas. - **Round-the-clock monitoring** to ensure resident well-being. ### Specialized Staff and Training The staff in memory care communities receive ongoing, specialized training in dementia care. They learn communication techniques tailored for individuals with memory loss, strategies for managing challenging behaviors, and how to provide compassionate, person-centered support. This expertise allows them to connect with residents on a deeper level and respond to their needs with patience and understanding. ### Therapeutic Activities and Programs A core component of memory care is a structured schedule of activities designed to engage residents and support their cognitive function. These programs are tailored to the abilities and interests of individuals with dementia and may include: - **Music therapy** to evoke positive memories and emotions. - **Art therapy** for self-expression and fine motor skill practice. - **Reminiscence therapy** using old photos, music, and objects to spark conversation. - **Sensory activities** involving textures, scents, and sounds to stimulate the senses. - **Light physical exercise**, such as seated yoga or guided walks, to maintain mobility. ### Personalized Care Plans Every resident in a memory care facility has a personalized care plan developed in collaboration with their family and healthcare providers. This plan outlines their medical needs, dietary requirements, personal preferences, and life history. It serves as a roadmap for the staff, ensuring that each resident receives care that is consistent, respectful, and tailored to their unique identity. ## What to Look for in a Hartford Memory Care Facility When you begin your search for “memory care near me,” you’ll want to evaluate several factors to find the best community for your loved one. - **Location:** Is the facility conveniently located for family and friends to visit regularly? Frequent visits are crucial for a smooth transition and continued connection. - **Staff Qualifications:** Ask about the staff’s training, experience, and the staff-to-resident ratio. Observe how staff members interact with residents during your tour. Do they seem patient, engaged, and respectful? - **Environment:** Does the facility feel warm and homelike? Look for cleanliness, good lighting, and comfortable common areas. A calm and inviting atmosphere can significantly reduce agitation and anxiety for residents. - **Cost and Payment:** Understand the pricing structure, what services are included, and any potential extra fees. Inquire about accepted payment options, including long-term care insurance, Medicare, or Medicaid. ## Assessing Your Loved One’s Needs Deciding when it’s the right time for memory care can be difficult. It’s a deeply personal decision that often comes after a period of increasing caregiving challenges at home. ### Signs It Might Be Time for Memory Care - **Safety Concerns:** Incidents like wandering, forgetting to turn off the stove, or medication errors. - **Declining Personal Hygiene:** Difficulty with bathing, dressing, or grooming. - **Social Isolation:** Withdrawing from friends, family, and activities they once enjoyed. - **Increased Agitation or Aggression:** Changes in behavior that become difficult to manage safely at home. - **Caregiver Burnout:** When the physical, emotional, and financial strain of caregiving becomes overwhelming. If you recognize these signs, it may be time to consider professional support. An assessment from a doctor or geriatric care manager can provide a clear picture of your loved one’s needs and help guide your decision-making process. ## The Cost of Memory Care in Hartford, CT The cost of memory care can be a significant concern for families. In the Hartford area, the average monthly cost for memory care is generally higher than assisted living due to the specialized staffing, training, and security features. Several factors influence the final cost, including the level of care required, the size of the room or apartment, and the specific amenities offered by the facility. When comparing costs, be sure to ask for a detailed breakdown of what is included in the base rate and what services may incur additional charges. ### Payment Options and Financial Aid Families in Connecticut can explore several avenues to help finance memory care: - **Long-Term Care Insurance:** Policies often cover the cost of memory care, but coverage details vary. - **Veterans Benefits:** The VA Aid and Attendance benefit can provide financial assistance to eligible veterans and their spouses. - **Connecticut Home Care Program for Elders (CHCPE):** While primarily for home care, this Medicaid waiver program may offer some financial support for services in assisted living settings. - **Private Pay:** Many families use savings, pensions, or the proceeds from selling a home to cover costs. Consulting with a financial advisor or an elder law attorney can help you understand your options and create a sustainable financial plan. ## Finding Dementia Care Hartford, CT: A Step-by-Step Guide The search for the right community takes time and research. Here’s a structured approach to help you find the best memory care facilities in the Hartford area. 1. **Gather Local Resources:** Start by contacting organizations like the Connecticut Chapter of the Alzheimer’s Association and the North Central Area Agency on Aging. They can provide lists of licensed facilities and valuable guidance. 2. **Create a Shortlist:** Based on your research and your loved one’s needs, create a list of 3-5 potential communities to tour. 3. **Schedule Tours:** Visit each facility in person. A tour is your best opportunity to assess the environment, meet the staff, and see residents in their daily routines. 4. **Ask Questions:** During your tours, come prepared with a list of questions. Don’t hesitate to ask about staffing, safety protocols, activity schedules, and communication with families. 5. **Follow Up:** After your visits, talk with other family members and, if possible, your loved one about their impressions. A second, unannounced visit can also provide a more candid look at the community. ## Preparing for the Transition Moving a loved one into memory care is an emotional process for everyone involved. Planning and open communication can help ease the transition. - **Involve Your Loved One:** If possible, include your loved one in the decision-making process. Frame the move as a way to ensure their safety and improve their quality of life. - **Personalize Their New Space:** Decorate their room with familiar items, such as family photos, a favorite blanket, and cherished keepsakes, to make it feel like home. - **Communicate with Staff:** Share your loved one’s life story, preferences, and routines with the care team. The more they know, the better they can connect and provide personalized care. - **Plan Your Visits:** Establish a regular visiting schedule. Consistency helps your loved one feel secure and connected. ## The Lasting Benefits of Quality Memory Care Choosing memory care is a proactive step toward enhancing your loved one’s well-being. These specialized communities offer profound benefits that often extend to the entire family. Residents experience improved safety, engage in stimulating social activities, and receive professional support tailored to their cognitive needs. For families, the relief of knowing their loved one is in a secure and caring environment can significantly reduce caregiver stress and restore a sense of balance to their lives. ## Find the Right Path Forward Navigating a dementia diagnosis is a journey, and you don’t have to walk it alone. The [memory care communities](https://averyheights.org/finding-the-best-memory-care-facilities-in-hartford-connecticut/ "Finding the Best Memory Care Facilities in Hartford, Connecticut") in [Hartford, CT,](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home "Hartford, CT,") offer a network of support dedicated to helping your loved one live with dignity and joy. By taking the time to research your options and ask the right questions, you can find a place that feels like home. We encourage you to reach out to local resources and begin the conversation today to secure the compassionate care your family deserves. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Dementia Care Communities in Hartford, CT: How to Find Specialized Support](https://averyheights.org/leading-dementia-care-communities-in-hartford-ct-for-specialized-support/) **Published:** July 21, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![dementia care communities](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/asian-nurse-senior-man-and-hug-in-portrait-with-s-2023-11-27-05-08-24-utc-1024x784.jpg "dementia care communities - Avery Heights")Dementia affects millions of families nationwide, and many in Connecticut are searching for compassionate, specialized care for loved ones living with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia. Hartford, CT, and the surrounding region offer several [dementia care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "Memory Care") communities designed to provide the safety, structure, and clinical expertise that individuals with memory loss require. Choosing the right memory care community is one of the most important decisions a family will make. The quality of care, staff training, and physical environment can significantly influence a resident’s comfort, cognitive function, and quality of life. This guide highlights what to look for in dementia care communities in [Hartford, CT,](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home) and provides an overview of leading options, with a closer look at Avery Heights and its specialized approach to memory care. --- ### **What to Look for in Dementia Care Communities** When researching “memory care facilities near me,” it helps to understand the criteria that distinguish specialized dementia care communities from standard senior living. #### **1. Staff Training and Dementia Expertise** High-quality dementia care begins with a well-trained staff. Leading memory care communities in Hartford: - Provide ongoing education on dementia and Alzheimer’s disease - Train caregivers in communication strategies and behavior management - Emphasize person-centered care that respects each resident’s history and preferences - Require certifications or specialized training in dementia care protocols This expertise enables staff to respond calmly to challenging behaviors, reduce anxiety, and maintain residents’ dignity. #### **2. Safety and Secure Environments** Dementia care environments must balance security with comfort. Effective communities: - Offer secured neighborhoods or units with controlled access - Use discreet monitoring systems to prevent unsafe wandering - Provide clearly marked layouts that reduce confusion - Include secure outdoor spaces for supervised walks and fresh air Thoughtful design helps reduce falls, prevent elopement, and support a sense of familiarity and calm. #### **3. Personalized Care Planning** No two dementia journeys are the same. Top dementia care communities in Hartford: - Develop individualized care plans based on medical history, cognitive status, and personal background - Tailor activities, dietary needs, and daily routines to each resident - Review and adjust care plans regularly as dementia progresses This personalized approach helps preserve abilities, reduce distress, and support emotional well-being. #### **4. Specialized Programs and Activities** Dementia-friendly programming is essential. Quality memory care communities often offer: - Music therapy and reminiscence sessions - Art and creative expression - Gentle exercise and movement classes - Sensory activities designed for different stages of dementia - Technology-assisted engagement to stimulate cognition These programs help residents connect with meaningful memories, maintain function, and enjoy daily life. --- ### **Avery Heights: A Leading Dementia Care Community in Hartford, CT** Among Hartford’s dementia care options, Avery Heights is widely recognized as a premier provider, offering a specialized, research-informed approach to memory care in a warm, homelike setting. #### **Specialized Focus on Memory Care** Avery Heights concentrates specifically on dementia care, allowing the team to focus on the complex needs of individuals with Alzheimer’s disease and related conditions. Their care model incorporates: - Personalized cognitive support strategies - Sensory stimulation and calming environments - Behavior management grounded in current dementia research Caregivers receive ongoing training in memory care protocols and communication techniques designed to promote comfort and trust. #### **Safe, Comfortable Environments** Avery Heights provides secure memory care neighborhoods that blend safety with a residential feel. Features include: - Controlled access and 24/7 staff presence - Secure, beautifully designed outdoor areas for walking and garden activities - Intuitive layouts and visual cues to reduce confusion These spaces allow residents to move more freely while staying safe. #### **Enriching, Dementia-Focused Activities** The community offers structured daily programming created specifically for individuals with memory loss, such as: - Music therapy tailored to residents’ preferences - Art programs that encourage self-expression and engagement - Reminiscence groups built around familiar themes and life stories - Intergenerational activities that foster connection These programs are carefully adapted to different stages of dementia and individual abilities. #### **Support for Families** Avery Heights understands that dementia affects the entire family. To support caregivers, they provide: - Educational workshops on dementia and caregiving strategies - Support groups to share experiences with other families - Regular updates about residents’ progress and care plans This collaborative approach helps families feel informed, supported, and included in their loved one’s care journey. --- ### **Other Dementia Care Options in the Greater Hartford Area** In addition to Avery Heights, families exploring dementia care communities in and around Hartford, CT may consider: - **Seabury at Bloomfield** – Known for its multi-neighborhood approach that aligns residents with others at similar stages of dementia, offering appropriate levels of stimulation and support. - **Brookdale West Hartford** – Part of a national network with standardized dementia care protocols and extensive staff training resources. - **The Residence at Quarry Hill** – Offers a more intimate, boutique environment with smaller household-style settings that can be comforting for residents who prefer quieter surroundings. Each community offers distinct advantages, and the best choice will depend on your loved one’s personality, preferences, and care needs. --- ### **Comparing Dementia Care Communities in Hartford, CT** When comparing dementia care communities, families should consider several key factors: #### **Services and Specialized Care** Most communities provide: - 24/7 staff presence - Assistance with daily activities - Medication management - Dementia-focused activities However, the depth and quality of these services can differ. Avery Heights stands out for its intensive focus on dementia care and its integration of specialized programming and evidence-informed care techniques. #### **Environment and Amenities** Look for: - Secure but inviting environments - Comfortable common areas - Accessible outdoor spaces - Clear signage and lighting Some communities emphasize a more traditional assisted living feel; others, like Avery Heights, are purposefully designed to meet the unique needs of memory care residents. #### **Costs and Value** In the Hartford area, memory care typically ranges from approximately $4,000 to $8,000 per month, depending on the level of support and services. When evaluating costs, consider: - What’s included in base pricing - Whether programming and therapies are extra - How pricing changes as care needs increase Value is best viewed through the lens of safety, quality of life, and family peace of mind. #### **Reputation and Family Feedback** Online reviews, licensing reports, and recommendations from local physicians or social workers can offer insight into: - Staff responsiveness - Communication with families - Consistency of care - Overall satisfaction with the community Don’t hesitate to ask for references from families whose loved ones have lived in the community. --- ### **Financial and Planning Resources for Dementia Care in Connecticut** Families often need guidance on how to pay for dementia care. Helpful resources may include: - Long-term care insurance policies - Medicaid-related options through the Connecticut Department of Social Services - Local Area Agencies on Aging for support services and respite resources - Veterans’ benefits, including potential Aid and Attendance support Many dementia care communities have staff who can help families explore these options. --- ### **Next Steps: Choosing the Right Dementia Care Community** Selecting a dementia care community in Hartford, CT is a significant decision, but you don’t have to navigate it alone. To move forward: 1. **Create a shortlist** of dementia care communities that align with your loved one’s needs. 2. **Schedule in-person tours** to observe staff interactions, activities, and overall atmosphere. 3. **Ask detailed questions** about staff training, safety protocols, communication practices, and how they support changing needs over time. 4. **Involve your loved one**, when possible, to gauge their comfort and reaction to each environment. The right community will not only provide specialized dementia care but also offer dignity, meaningful engagement, and a supportive environment for both residents and families. If you are exploring dementia care communities in Hartford, CT, consider scheduling a visit to Avery Heights or other local providers to see firsthand how their teams can support your loved one through every stage of their dementia journey. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Assisted Living in Hartford, CT: Discover Exceptional Care at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/discover-exceptional-assisted-living-hartford-ct/) **Published:** June 26, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Choosing assisted living for a loved one is one of the most meaningful decisions a family can make. Families across Connecticut want more than support with daily tasks—they want a community that values dignity, independence, and a vibrant quality of life. Avery Heights in [Hartford, CT](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home) is recognized as one of the region’s leading assisted living communities, offering personalized care, a welcoming environment, and a commitment to enhancing the well-being of every resident. This guide explores what makes Avery Heights a premier option for assisted living in Hartford, CT, including individualized care planning, community life, amenities, and the unique benefits of its Connecticut location. ## **Personalized Assisted Living Care Tailored to Each Resident** No two residents share the same life story or daily needs. Avery Heights designs individualized care plans focused on independence, comfort, and safety. ### **Comprehensive Assessment Process** Every resident begins with a structured assessment conducted by a multidisciplinary care team. This process includes: - Full health and medication evaluations - Review of daily living preferences and routines - Assessment of mobility, balance, and safety needs - Identification of social, recreational, and spiritual interests - Collaboration with family members and healthcare professionals This ensures that each resident’s care plan reflects both clinical needs and personal preferences. ### **Flexible Levels of Care** Care needs often change over time. Avery Heights adjusts levels of support as residents’ abilities evolve, allowing them to remain in a familiar setting without unnecessary transitions. Assistance may include: - Bathing, dressing, and grooming - Medication reminders and management - Mobility support and fall prevention - Meal preparation and nutrition guidance - Housekeeping and laundry support - Transportation for appointments and errands ### **Specialized Support Services** Beyond day-to-day assistance, Avery Heights provides specialized care for residents with chronic conditions, mobility challenges, or mild cognitive changes—always prioritizing dignity, respect, and autonomy. ## **A Vibrant Senior Living Community That Feels Like Home** Assisted living is not only about care—it’s about community life. Avery Heights offers a socially enriching environment where residents build friendships, explore interests, and stay active mentally and emotionally. ### **Full Calendar of Engaging Activities** Avery Heights offers diverse programming designed to stimulate creativity, movement, and social connection. Activities may include: - Arts and crafts workshops - Music appreciation and live performances - Book clubs and educational talks - Gardening groups and outdoor activities - Religious programs and spiritual services - Seasonal celebrations and holiday events ### **Resident-Driven Activities** Residents help shape community life by sharing their interests, requesting programs, and participating in planning. This resident-centered approach keeps the activity calendar meaningful and dynamic. ### **Inviting Common Areas** Thoughtfully designed lounges, outdoor patios, walking paths, and dining spaces encourage residents to gather, relax, and enjoy everyday moments with neighbors and loved ones. ## **Comprehensive Assisted Living Services and Amenities at Avery Heights** Avery Heights provides a wide range of services designed to promote comfort, convenience, and overall well-being. ### **Exceptional Dining Experience** Nutritious meals are prepared daily with attention to variety and dietary needs. Residents enjoy: - Restaurant-style dining - Multiple menu options - Accommodations for dietary restrictions - Casual seating for family visits - Special themed meals and events ### **Healthcare and Wellness Support** Avery Heights maintains strong partnerships with Hartford’s medical community, ensuring seamless healthcare coordination. Services include: - Communication with primary care physicians - Routine health monitoring - Assistance with specialist visits - Medication management - Emergency response systems in resident apartments ### **Technology and Communication Tools** Modern senior living benefits from reliable technology that supports safety and family connection. Resources include: - Community-wide Wi-Fi - Emergency call systems - Assistance with video calls and digital communication - Support for smartphones, tablets, and simple tech tools ### **The Assisted Living Hartford Advantage** Hartford, CT offers exceptional access to healthcare, culture, and family connection—making Avery Heights an ideal setting for assisted living residents. ### **Access to Exceptional Healthcare** Residents benefit from proximity to: - Leading hospitals and medical centers - Specialty physicians - Large healthcare networks experienced in senior care - Convenient medical transportation ### **Cultural and Recreational Experiences** Hartford’s cultural scene enriches life at Avery Heights through opportunities such as: - Museums and historical sites - Local parks, walking paths, and gardens - Seasonal festivals and community events - Dining, shopping, and family-friendly attractions ### **Convenient Access for Families** Located in Connecticut’s capital city, Avery Heights is easily accessible via major highways, making visits simple for families throughout the state and New England. ## **Experience Exceptional Assisted Living in Hartford, CT** Avery Heights has earned its reputation as one of Hartford’s premier assisted living communities. With personalized care, a vibrant lifestyle, and a compassionate team, residents experience the comfort, dignity, and independence they deserve. If you’re exploring assisted living in Hartford, CT, we invite you to visit Avery Heights, meet our team, and discover a community designed to help seniors thrive. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Expert Memory Care Services in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/expert-memory-care-services-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/) **Published:** April 16, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![memory care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/happy-elderly-people-smiling-on-camera-with-city-i-2024-09-05-22-02-18-utc-300x200.jpg "memory care - Avery Heights") Caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s or dementia is a deeply emotional and complex responsibility. As cognitive changes progress, families often find that their loved one needs more than traditional caregiving—they need a specialized environment, expert support, and a team trained to understand every stage of memory loss. Avery Heights provides comprehensive [memory care services](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) in Hartford, CT, designed to support residents with dignity, safety, and compassion. If you are searching for “memory care near me,” this guide explains what memory care includes, how Avery Heights supports cognitive well-being, and how families can navigate this important transition. ## What Are Memory Care Services? Memory care is a specialized long-term senior living option designed for individuals with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, or other cognitive conditions. These communities provide structure, therapeutic support, and security while promoting comfort and familiarity. Residents benefit from: - A safe, secure environment - Daily routines to reduce stress - Staff trained specifically in dementia care - Cognitive, physical, and emotional engagement activities - Personalized care plans that evolve with their needs Memory care is different from traditional assisted living because it focuses on the unique challenges associated with memory loss wandering, confusion, communication changes, and behavioral shifts. ## Understanding Dementia and Its Impact Dementia refers to a group of cognitive disorders that affect memory, judgment, communication, and daily functioning. [Alzheimer’s](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/) disease accounts for the majority of cases, though there are many other forms. Common symptoms include: - Short-term memory loss - Difficulty communicating - Confusion about time or place - Mood or personality changes - Challenges with daily tasks - Increased risk of wandering or unsafe behaviors Caring for someone with dementia requires more than assistance—it requires a deep understanding of the condition and the ability to respond calmly and effectively as symptoms evolve. ## The Challenges Families Face When Providing Care Supporting a loved one with dementia can be physically and emotionally overwhelming. Families often encounter: - Safety risks within the home - Increased stress and burnout - Difficulty managing behavioral changes - The need for round-the-clock supervision - Balancing caregiving with work and personal life Avery Heights offers a structured and compassionate solution, allowing families to shift from full-time caregiving to spending meaningful, quality time with their loved one. ## Comprehensive Memory Care at Avery Heights Avery Heights is recognized as one of Hartford’s leading memory care providers. Our program is built on a combination of clinical best practices, compassionate care, and individualized support. ### Key Features of Our Memory Care Program #### 24/7 Trained Dementia Care Staff Our caregiving team is specially trained to understand the behaviors, communication patterns, and emotional needs associated with memory loss. #### Secure, Supportive Environment Safety is essential. Our memory care neighborhood includes secured areas, enclosed outdoor courtyards, and monitoring systems to prevent wandering while allowing freedom of movement. #### Therapeutic Activities and Engagement Residents participate in daily activities that promote cognitive, physical, and social engagement, including: - Music therapy - Reminiscence and storytelling sessions - Sensory activities - Art and creative expression - Gentle exercise or movement programs These experiences help maintain abilities, spark memories, and support emotional well-being. #### Nutritious, Thoughtfully Prepared Meals Each resident receives healthy meals tailored to their dietary and medical needs. Mealtimes also provide important social and sensory stimulation. ## Personalized Care Plans for Every Resident Effective memory care must reflect the individual behind the diagnosis. At Avery Heights, each resident’s care plan is created based on: - Health assessments and cognitive evaluations - Medical needs and behavioral patterns - Daily living preferences - Family insights and life history Care plans are continually reviewed and adjusted to ensure residents receive the right level of support as their condition progresses. ## Support for Families and Caregivers Transitioning a loved one into memory care is a major decision, and families often need just as much support as residents. Avery Heights provides: ### Family Counseling and Emotional Support Our team helps families understand dementia, manage expectations, and navigate changing roles. ### Ongoing Communication Families receive regular updates and are encouraged to stay involved in their loved one’s care. ### Support Groups and Educational Workshops These sessions build a sense of community and empower families with practical tools for connecting with their loved ones. ## Why Families Choose Avery Heights for Memory Care Families seeking “memory care facilities near me” choose Avery Heights because of: ### Clinical Expertise Our care team includes experienced professionals specializing in dementia and Alzheimer’s care. ### A Welcoming, Home-Like Community Residents feel comfortable, supported, and connected to others. ### Comprehensive Services Our approach combines safety, personalized care, and enriching activities in one setting. ### Decades of Trust in Hartford, CT Avery Heights has a long-standing reputation for excellence in senior care. ### Commitment to Quality and Continuous Improvement We consistently evaluate and enhance our programs to ensure the highest level of resident satisfaction. ## A Compassionate Approach to Memory Care Memory loss presents significant challenges, but with the right support, individuals can still enjoy meaningful moments, relationships, and comfort. At Avery Heights, our mission is to create a supportive community where every resident is valued, and every family feels understood. If you are exploring dementia care or memory care in [Hartford, CT](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home), we invite you to meet our team, tour our community, and learn how we can help your loved one thrive. **Contact Avery Heights today to schedule a tour or speak with a memory care specialist.** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [West Hartford Assisted Living: Your Comprehensive Guide to Senior Care Options](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-your-guide-to-senior-care-community/) **Published:** January 20, 2025 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** Finding the right assisted living community in [West Hartford](https://www.westhartfordct.gov) can feel overwhelming—especially when you’re trying to balance medical needs, lifestyle preferences, safety, and financial considerations. This guide walks you through everything families need to know, from the benefits of assisted living to evaluating top communities and understanding local costs. By the end, you’ll be equipped to make an informed, confident decision about the best senior living environment for your loved one. --- ## **Why Consider Assisted Living in West Hartford?** Choosing assisted living is often a significant transition, but it can greatly enhance a senior’s quality of life. Families commonly seek assisted living for the following reasons: ### **1. Health, Support, and Safety** Daily tasks such as cooking, cleaning, bathing, or medication management can become difficult with age. Assisted living communities provide professional support 24/7, offering: - Help with daily routines - Medication monitoring - Emergency response - Secure living environments Seniors maintain independence while receiving the reliable care they need. ### **2. Social Connection and Community** Isolation is one of the most common challenges aging adults face. Assisted living communities in West Hartford prioritize engagement through: - Group dining - Recreational activities - Outings and special events - Wellness and fitness programs These interactions help residents build friendships and stay mentally and emotionally active. ### **3. Personalized Care Plans** Every resident receives an individualized care plan based on their abilities, preferences, and medical needs. Whether someone needs light assistance or help with several daily tasks, care teams adjust support as needs evolve. ### **4. Relief for Family Caregivers** Assisted living provides peace of mind, giving families the opportunity to spend meaningful time with their loved one rather than managing day-to-day caregiving responsibilities. --- ## **Top Assisted Living Communities in West Hartford, CT** West Hartford and the surrounding Hartford area offer a range of high-quality assisted living options. Below are several notable communities to explore. ## **Avery Heights (Hartford, CT)** Avery Heights is known for its warm, welcoming campus and long-standing reputation for excellence. Located on 43 spacious acres, it blends comfort, convenience, and compassionate care. ### **What Makes Avery Heights Stand Out** - Rental-only model with **no entrance fees** - 24-hour security and professional care team - Access to a modern Wellness Center - On-site memory care services - Thoughtfully designed apartments with safety features - A full calendar of social and enrichment programs Families often choose Avery Heights for its holistic approach to senior wellness and its emphasis on helping residents maintain independence. --- ## **The McAuley** Located in West Hartford, The McAuley offers an active lifestyle with cultural programming, fitness classes, and chef-prepared dining. Although faith-based, the community welcomes residents of all backgrounds. ## **Brookdale Chatfield** Brookdale provides personalized care plans within a socially active setting. Their continuum of care supports residents as needs change, making it a flexible long-term choice. ## **Atria Hamilton Heights** Situated in a restored historic convent, this community pairs architectural charm with updated amenities. Its programs focus on emotional, social, and physical well-being. ## **Hoffman SummerWood Community** Known for its warm environment and attentive staff, SummerWood offers robust health services, a strong culinary program including kosher dining, and a variety of enrichment activities. --- ## **Costs of Assisted Living in West Hartford** In West Hartford, assisted living typically ranges from **$4,600 to $6,000 per month**, depending on care levels, apartment size, and amenities. Premium communities or those offering specialized memory care may be higher. ### **Factors That Influence Pricing** - Level of medical or personal care - Apartment type (studio, one-bedroom, or shared suite) - Amenities such as fitness centers, transportation, or specialized programming - Dining packages and optional services ### **Tips for Financial Planning** - Request detailed pricing from each community, including potential future increases. - Review long-term care insurance policies to see what’s covered. - Explore state programs for eligible Connecticut residents. - Discuss shared family contributions or financial planning options early. --- ## **How to Choose the Right Assisted Living Community in West Hartford** Selecting the best community requires thoughtful evaluation. These steps will help guide your decision: ### **1. Tour Multiple Communities** In-person visits reveal important details about cleanliness, staff attentiveness, resident engagement, and overall atmosphere. Take notes during each tour. ### **2. Ask Key Questions** Prepare questions such as: - What is the staff-to-resident ratio? - Are nurses or medical professionals available on-site? - What activities or wellness programs are offered? - How are dietary needs managed? - What does the move-in process look like? ### **3. Consider Proximity to Family** Choosing a location near loved ones encourages consistent visitation and supports emotional well-being. ### **4. Read Reviews and Request References** Online reviews, testimonials, and conversations with current families provide insight into real experiences. ### **5. Support a Smooth Transition** Help your loved one feel at home by bringing meaningful personal items—family photographs, favorite books, treasured décor—and visiting regularly during the first months. --- ## **Helping Your Loved One Thrive in West Hartford Assisted Living** Assisted living in West Hartford is more than a practical solution—it’s an opportunity for seniors to enjoy safety, independence, companionship, and enrichment. From vibrant communities to specialized memory care programs, families can find exceptional options that match their loved one’s needs. If you’re ready to explore a trusted, compassionate community, Avery Heights is here to help you every step of the way. **Contact Avery Heights today to schedule a tour or speak with a senior living specialist.** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Assisted Living in CT: A Guide to Quality Senior Care](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-quality-senior-care/) **Published:** May 7, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Assisted Living in CT](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/helper-caring-for-elderly-lady-2024-03-01-17-38-08-utc-300x200.jpg "Ouderernzorg op maat - Avery Heights")As Connecticut’s senior population grows, the need for quality assisted living options has never been more critical. Assisted living in CT offers a supportive environment that allows seniors to maintain their independence while receiving the care they need. In this comprehensive guide, we’ll explore what assisted living entails, how to choose the right facility, and the importance of community and socialization in ensuring the well-being of your loved ones. ## Understanding Assisted Living in CT: Assisted living is a long-term care option that provides housing, personal care services, and healthcare to [seniors who require assistance](https://averyheights.org/discovering-assisted-living-in-hartford-a-comprehensive-guide-for-seniors-and-caregivers/) with daily activities. In CT, assisted living facilities offer a range of services, including: - 24-hour supervision and security - Assistance with activities of daily living (ADLs) such as bathing, dressing, and medication management - Housekeeping and laundry services - Meals and dietary support - Transportation to medical appointments and social activities - Access to healthcare services ### The Selection Process: Choosing the right assisted living facility in CT requires careful consideration of several factors: 1. Location: Consider proximity to family, healthcare providers, and community resources. 2. Cost: Assisted living costs vary depending on location, services, and amenities. Understand the financial implications and explore payment options. 3. Services: Ensure the facility offers the specific care and support your loved one needs. 4. Amenities: Look for amenities that align with your loved one’s preferences and interests, such as fitness centers, gardens, or libraries. 5. Staff: Evaluate the staff’s qualifications, training, and demeanor to ensure compassionate and competent care. ### Navigating Financial Aspects of Assisted Living in CT: The cost of assisted living in CT can be a significant concern for many families. However, several payment options are available: - Private pay: Many families pay for assisted living out of pocket using personal savings, pensions, or long-term care insurance. - Medicaid: Connecticut’s Medicaid program, known as the Connecticut Home Care Program for Elders (CHCPE), may cover assisted living costs for eligible seniors. - Veterans Benefits: Veterans and their spouses may be eligible for financial assistance through the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA). ### The Importance of Community and Socialization of Assisted Living in CT: One of the most significant benefits of assisted living in CT is the sense of community and opportunities for socialization. Engaging in [social activities and forming connections](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) with peers can help combat feelings of isolation and depression, which are common among seniors. CT assisted living facilities offer a wide range of social and recreational activities, such as: - Exercise classes and wellness programs - Creative workshops and art classes - Book clubs and discussion groups - Movie screenings and musical performances - Outings to local attractions and events ### Quality of Care and Safety: When choosing an assisted living facility in CT, it’s crucial to ensure that your loved one will receive high-quality care in a safe environment. CT assisted living facilities are regulated by the Department of Public Health and must adhere to strict safety and care standards. Some key factors to consider include: - Staff training and qualifications - Medication management procedures - Emergency response protocols - Infection control measures - Resident rights and protections ### Personal Testimonials and Success Stories of Assisted Living in CT: To gain a deeper understanding of life in a CT assisted living facility, consider seeking out personal testimonials and success stories from current residents and their families. These firsthand accounts can provide valuable insights into the quality of care, sense of community, and overall satisfaction with the facility. ### Conclusion and Next Steps: Assisted living in CT offers a supportive and engaging environment for seniors who require assistance with daily activities. By understanding the services, amenities, and financial aspects of assisted living, you can make an informed decision that prioritizes your loved one’s well-being and quality of life. When evaluating potential facilities, consider location, cost, services, amenities, staff qualifications, and safety standards. Seek personal testimonials and success stories to better understand life in a CT assisted living facility. At Avery Heights, we are dedicated to providing exceptional assisted living services in a vibrant and supportive community. Focusing on wellness, socialization, and [personalized care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/), we strive to empower our residents to live life fully. Contact us today to schedule a tour and learn more about how we can support your loved one’s journey. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Find Quality Memory Care in Connecticut for a Loved One](https://averyheights.org/find-quality-memory-care-in-connecticut-for-your-loved-one/) **Published:** June 7, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/youre-playing-against-someone-wiser-2024-09-19-19-26-04-utc-1024x649.jpg "Youre playing against someone wiser. - Avery Heights")The process can feel overwhelming when it comes to finding the best memory care in Connecticut for your loved one. With so many options available, knowing where to start is hard. You want to make sure your family member receives the highest quality care in a safe, nurturing environment. But how do you choose the right memory care facility? Looking for exceptional memory care? You’ll find it in Connecticut, where top-notch communities cater to individuals with Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other memory challenges. These communities focus on creating a soothing atmosphere, allowing residents to thrive and [live life](https://averyheights.org/10-ways-assisted-living-can-improve-your-quality-of-life/) fully. In this guide, we’ll explore everything you need to know about memory care in Connecticut. From understanding the different types of care available to compare costs and services, you’ll gain the knowledge and tools to make an informed decision for your loved one. ## Table of Contents: - [What Is Memory Care and How Does It Differ from Other Senior Living Options?](#whatismemorycareandhowdoesitdifferfromotherseniorlivingoptions) - [Memory Care vs. Assisted Living](#memorycarevsassistedliving) - [Memory Care vs. Nursing Home](#memorycarevsnursinghome) - [Choosing the Right Care for Your Loved One](#choosingtherightcareforyourlovedone) - [The Cost of Memory Care in Connecticut](#thecostofmemorycareinconnecticut) - [Median Memory Care Cost](#medianmemorycarecost) - [Memory Care Costs by State](#memorycarecostsbystate) - [Daily Memory Care Costs](#dailymemorycarecosts) - [Monthly Memory Care Costs](#monthlymemorycarecosts) - [Annual Memory Care Costs](#annualmemorycarecosts) - [How to Pay for Memory Care Costs](#howtopayformemorycarecosts) - [Are Memory Care Costs Tax Deductible?](#arememorycarecoststaxdeductible) - [Avery Heights: Award-Winning Memory Care in Connecticut](#averyheightsawardwinningmemorycareinconnecticut) - [Understanding the Difference Between Alzheimer’s and Dementia](#understandingthedifferencebetweenalzheimersanddementia) - [What Is Alzheimer’s Disease? What Is Dementia?](#whatisalzheimersdiseasewhatisdementia) - [What Is the Difference Between Alzheimer’s and Dementia?](#whatisthedifferencebetweenalzheimersanddementia) - [What Are the Other Common Causes of Dementia?](#whataretheothercommoncausesofdementia) - [How Do Doctors Determine What Causes Dementia?](#howdodoctorsdeterminewhatcausesdementia) - [How Is Alzheimer’s Diagnosed?](#howisalzheimersdiagnosed) - [What Kind of Doctor Diagnoses and Treats Dementia?](#whatkindofdoctordiagnosesandtreatsdementia) - [Is There Treatment for Alzheimer’s Disease?](#istheretreatmentforalzheimersdisease) - [How to Prevent Dementia](#howtopreventdementia) - [Providing the Highest Levels of Assisted Living Memory Care in Connecticut](#providingthehighestlevelsofassistedlivingmemorycareinconnecticut) - [What to Look for in a Memory Care Community](#whattolookforinamemorycarecommunity) - [The Benefits of Assisted Living Memory Care](#thebenefitsofassistedlivingmemorycare) - [The Importance of Personalized Care](#theimportanceofpersonalizedcare) - [The Value of Specialized Training](#thevalueofspecializedtraining) - [The Importance of a Supportive Environment](#theimportanceofasupportiveenvironment) - [The Benefits of Engaging Activities](#thebenefitsofengagingactivities) - [The Value of Family Involvement](#thevalueoffamilyinvolvement) - [Conclusion](#conclusion) ## What Is Memory Care and How Does It Differ from Other Senior Living Options? Suppose you’re searching for the right senior living option for a loved one with memory impairment. In that case, you may be wondering about the differences between memory care, assisted living, and [nursing homes](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living/). As someone who’s helped countless families navigate this journey, I know how overwhelming it can be. Let’s break it down together. ### Memory Care in Connecticut vs. Assisted Living in Connecticut Memory care is a specialized form of assisted living that caters to the unique needs of seniors with Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other memory impairments. While assisted living provides general support with daily tasks, memory care facilities offer a more secure environment, specially trained staff, and activities designed to improve cognitive function. ### Memory Care in Connecticut vs. Nursing Home in Connecticut Nursing homes provide a higher level of medical care compared to memory care facility options. They’re better suited for [seniors with complex health](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-understanding-the-aging-process_-health-and-wellness-tips-for-seniors-at-avery-heights/) issues who require 24/7 skilled nursing care. On the other hand, memory care focuses on creating a safe, structured environment that supports the unique needs of those with memory loss. ### Choosing the Right Care for Your Loved One Consider your loved one’s specific needs when deciding between memory care, assisted living, and [nursing homes](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living/). Factors to evaluate include the level of memory impairment, medical requirements, safety concerns, and the desire for social engagement. I remember when my grandmother started showing signs of dementia. It was a difficult time for our family, but we found comfort in knowing she was receiving the specialized care she needed in a memory care community. Consult with medical professionals and tour various care facilities to find the best fit. Trust your instincts and don’t be afraid to ask questions. With the right support, your loved one can continue to live a fulfilling life. ## The Cost of Memory Care in Connecticut One of the biggest concerns families have when considering memory care in Connecticut is the cost. As someone who’s helped many navigate the financial aspects of senior living, I understand how stressful it can be. Let’s look closer at the expenses associated with memory care in the Constitution State. ### Median Memory Care Cost According to Genworth’s 2021 Cost of Care Survey, Connecticut’s median monthly cost for memory care is $7,838. This is higher than the national median of $5,625 per month. However, memory care costs can vary significantly depending on location, facility amenities, and the level of care required. ### Memory Care Costs by State Connecticut ranks among the more expensive states for memory care. Neighboring states like New York ($5,725) and Massachusetts ($7,357) have lower median monthly costs, while Rhode Island ($7,537) is slightly less expensive than Connecticut. It’s important to research costs in specific areas within the state, as prices can fluctuate based on local factors. ### Daily Memory Care Costs In Connecticut, the average daily cost of memory care is approximately $258, which translates to an annual cost of around $94,056. However, daily rates may be higher or lower depending on the specific facility and the services provided. ### Monthly Memory Care Costs The median monthly cost for memory care in Connecticut is $7,838. However, monthly prices can range from about $5,000 to over $10,000. Factors that influence monthly costs include the facility’s location, the living space’s size, and the level of care and amenities offered. ### Annual Memory Care Costs On average, the annual cost of memory care in Connecticut is $94,056. Throughout a typical three-year stay in a memory care facility, families can expect to pay around $282,168. Long-term care insurance, life insurance, and reverse mortgages are some options to help cover these substantial costs. ### How to Pay for Memory Care Costs Paying for memory care in Connecticut can be challenging, but options are available. These include [long-term care](https://averyheights.org/everything-you-need-to-know-about-long-term-care-for-seniors/) insurance, and veterans benefits for those who qualify. Other programs may be available consult your local [State Units on Aging (SUAs)](https://www.hhs.gov/aging/state-resources/index.html) for more information on other financial programs. Some families also use a combination of personal savings, Social Security benefits, and contributions from family members to cover care costs. ### Does Medicaid Cover Memory Care Costs? Medicare does not typically cover the costs of memory care in Connecticut. Medicare is primarily designed to cover short-term medical expenses, such as hospital stays and doctor visits. However, Medicare may cover some aspects of care for those with Alzheimer’s or dementia, such as diagnostic testing and medication management. ### Are Memory Care Costs Tax Deductible? In some cases, memory care costs in Connecticut may be tax deductible. The IRS allows deductions for medical expenses, including [long-term care](https://averyheights.org/everything-you-need-to-know-about-long-term-care-for-seniors/), if they exceed 7.5% of the individual’s adjusted gross income. Consult with a tax professional to determine if your loved one’s memory care expenses qualify for a deduction. Don’t let the cost of memory care deter you from seeking the best possible care for your loved one. With [careful planning and the proper financial assistance,](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-quality-senior-care/) you can ensure they receive the support they need. ## Avery Heights: Award-Winning Memory Care in Connecticut Regarding exceptional memory care in Connecticut, Avery Heights stands out. This award-winning memory care community in Hartford offers a warm, welcoming environment where seniors with Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other memory impairments can thrive. What sets Avery Heights apart? For starters, their dedicated staff goes above and beyond to provide personalized care and support. From assistance with daily tasks to engaging activities designed to stimulate the mind and body, residents receive the attention they need to live their best lives. The secure, comfortable setting of Avery Heights features beautiful outdoor spaces, cozy common areas, and private apartments that feel like home. With staff on hand 24/7, families can have peace of mind knowing their loved ones are safe and well cared for. But it’s not just about the physical environment. Avery Heights takes a holistic approach to memory care services, focusing on each resident’s unique needs and preferences. Their innovative programming includes music therapy, art classes, and reminiscence [activities that help preserve cognitive function and promote social](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) interaction. I had the pleasure of touring Avery Heights when searching for a memory care community for my own loved one. From the moment I walked in, I could feel the warmth and compassion that permeates every aspect of this remarkable place. The staff truly goes above and beyond to create a nurturing, supportive environment. If you’re looking for top-notch memory care in Connecticut, I highly recommend considering Avery Heights. With their commitment to excellence and person-centered approach, they set the standard for what memory care should be. **Key Takeaway:** Ask yourself three crucial questions when evaluating memory care options for your loved one: What are their specific needs, what level of social engagement do they desire, and what safety concerns do you need to address? ## Understanding the Difference Between Alzheimer’s and Dementia To provide top-notch dementia care, you need to grasp the distinction between Alzheimer’s and dementia – two terms often mistakenly used interchangeably. Memory impairment can be a challenging puzzle for families to solve. As someone who’s worked in this field for years, I’m here to help you understand it. ### What Is Alzheimer’s Disease? What Is Dementia? Dementia is like an umbrella that covers a wide range of symptoms affecting memory, thinking, and social abilities. Alzheimer’s, for instance, falls under this umbrella. Alzheimer’s disease, on the other hand, is a specific type of dementia. It’s a progressive neurological disorder that affects memory, thinking, and behavior. Alzheimer’s accounts for 60-80% of all dementia cases. ### What Is the Difference Between Alzheimer’s and Dementia? Think of it this way: Alzheimer’s is a type of dementia, but not all dementia is Alzheimer’s. While Alzheimer’s is the most common cause of dementia, there are other types of dementia with different causes and symptoms. For example, vascular dementia is caused by reduced blood flow to the brain, often due to stroke or cardiovascular disease. Lewy body dementia is characterized by abnormal protein deposits in the brain. Frontotemporal dementia affects the frontal and temporal lobes of the brain. ### What Are the Other Common Causes of Dementia? Alzheimer’s isn’t the only culprit behind dementia – other common causes include: - Vascular dementia - Lewy body dementia - Frontotemporal dementia - Parkinson’s disease - Huntington’s disease - Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease Infections, immune disorders, and nutritional deficiencies are some of the less common factors that can contribute to this issue. ### How Do Doctors Determine What Causes Dementia? Dementia diagnosis starts with a comprehensive medical workup. This thorough evaluation is crucial in identifying the root cause of the condition. - A thorough medical history - Cognitive and neurological tests - Brain imaging (CT or MRI scans) - Laboratory tests In some cases, a definitive diagnosis can only be made through a brain autopsy after death. ### How Is Alzheimer’s Diagnosed? To pinpoint an Alzheimer’s diagnosis, doctors embark on a detailed evaluation, echoing the process used for dementia. This entails a thorough medical history review, cognitive tests, and neurological exams. Brain imaging results complete the diagnostic picture. To aid in diagnosis, biomarkers like beta-amyloid and tau proteins in cerebrospinal fluid may be measured. But the only way to confirm Alzheimer’s with absolute certainty is through a brain autopsy after the patient has passed away. ### What Kind of Doctor Diagnoses and Treats Dementia? Having the right medical team behind you can make all the difference when it comes to dementia. That’s why it’s reassuring to know that multiple types of doctors are equipped to diagnose and treat this complex condition. - Primary care physicians - Neurologists (specialists in brain and nervous system disorders) - Geriatricians (specialists in caring for older adults) - Geriatric psychiatrists (specialists in mental health issues affecting older adults) Managing dementia [care requires a multifaceted approach](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/), so having a team of specialists working together is often beneficial. ### Is There Treatment for Alzheimer’s Disease? Airless fog of Alzheimer’s may surround us, but there’s a silver lining – promising treatments can help streamline symptoms, ushering in a new era of independence and confidence. - Medications like cholinesterase inhibitors and memantine - Cognitive stimulation therapy - Exercise - Social engagement You might be surprised to learn that non-pharmacological interventions can be just as effective as medication in managing the symptoms of Alzheimer’s. ### How to Prevent Dementia To cut your risk of dementia, it’s essential to live a healthy lifestyle. That means… - Regular exercise - A healthy diet (like the Mediterranean diet) - Staying socially active - Engaging in mentally stimulating activities - Managing stress - Controlling cardiovascular risk factors (high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes) witnessing the effects of dementia up close has shown me just how vital it is to grasp the distinction between Alzheimer’s and dementia. Without this knowledge, you risk leaving your loved one without the proper care and attention they need. ## Providing the Highest Levels of Assisted Living Memory Care in Connecticut Finding the right memory care in Connecticut requires a deep understanding of exceptional care. As someone who’s dedicated their career to supporting seniors with Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other memory impairments, I know that it’s the small details that make all the difference. In Connecticut, top-notch memory care communities provide a supportive environment that caters to the specific needs of residents. From 24-hour supervision to engaging activities and compassionate care from trained professionals, these communities offer comprehensive services. ### What to Look for in a Memory Care Community Finding the right memory care community can be challenging, but knowing what to look for is half the battle. There are several key factors to consider when searching for a community that’s just right for your loved one. - A secure, comfortable environment - Highly-trained staff available 24/7 - Personalized care plans - Engaging activities and programs - Nutritious meals and snacks - Assistance with daily living tasks - Access to [health care](https://portal.ct.gov/DORS/Content-Pages/Programs/Long-Term-Care-Ombudsman-Program) services You need a community that’s built a strong reputation for providing top-notch care. Look for one with a history of helping residents with memory impairments and can show you the results to back it up. ### The Benefits of Assisted Living Memory Care When memory impairment sets in, everyday life can become a struggle. That’s where assisted living memory care comes in – providing a safe haven where seniors can thrive, surrounded by compassionate caregivers and personalized support. - A safe, secure environment - Assistance with daily living tasks - Opportunities for social engagement - Stimulating activities and programs - Access to health care services - Peace of mind for families By choosing a high-quality assisted living memory care community, seniors can receive the support they need to maintain their quality of life and families can have peace of mind knowing their loved one is receiving the best possible care. ### The Importance of Personalized Care In memory care, personalized attention is essential. Since every resident has their strengths, weaknesses, and preferences, the top memory care communities in Connecticut focus on crafting individualized plans that cater to each person’s distinct needs. We take a personalized approach to care, recognizing that everyone has distinct needs and preferences. This means our support with daily living tasks, activities, and programs is tailored to foster a sense of independence and joy. ### The Value of Specialized Training Exceptional [memory care](https://www.dementiacarecentral.com/memory-care-facilities/connecticut) requires a deep understanding of the complexities of dementia. That’s why the best [care communities](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/continuing-care-retirement-communities/) in Connecticut prioritize ongoing staff training and education, empowering their teams to deliver top-notch care. What sets exceptional memory care communities apart is their unwavering commitment to staff development. By equipping caregivers with advanced training in memory impairment, these communities can architect truly supportive environments that stimulate and nurture their residents. The outcome? Exceptional care that honors the human spirit. ### The Importance of a Supportive Environment Creating a warm and welcoming atmosphere in Connecticut is crucial for delivering exceptional [memory care](https://www.assistedliving.org/memory-care/connecticut). By combining personalized attention with specialized training, the best [care communities make residents feel right at home](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/). Think of a memory care community as a close-knit neighborhood. Residents live in comfortable, specially designed homes, surrounded by secure outdoor spaces and bustling community areas. This thoughtful approach helps them feel secure, engaged, and part of a vibrant community. ### The Benefits of Engaging Activities A robust activity program is vital in memory care communities. In Connecticut, the best communities recognize the importance of engagement and offer a diverse range of activities to stimulate the minds, bodies, and spirits of their residents. Immerse yourself in our engaging activities designed to stimulate the mind and body. Whether it’s the rhythmic beats of music therapy, the tranquility of gardening, or the excitement of pet therapy, exercise programs, and art therapy, our residents experience a significant reduction in stress and anxiety, leading to a better life. ### The Value of Family Involvement Families are vital in delivering exceptional assisted living memory care in Connecticut. That’s why the best memory care communities encourage family involvement and provide ample opportunities for loved ones to stay connected. This includes regular communication with families, family [support groups,](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/) and opportunities for families to participate in activities and events. By involving families in the care process, memory care communities can provide a more comprehensive and supportive care experience for residents. Caring for seniors with memory impairments is more than just a job – it’s a calling. Having spent years working in memory care, I’ve witnessed the profound impact that top-notch care can have on their lives. Families can rest easy knowing their loved ones are in capable hands at a memory care community that provides exceptional support. **Key Takeaway:** Compare dementia to an umbrella, with Alzheimer’s being one type of rain that falls under it – understand the differences to choose the right care for your loved one. ## Conclusion Choosing the right memory care community in Connecticut for your loved one is a big decision. Before making a choice, it’s important to take the time to research your options, ask questions, and tour multiple facilities. Look for a community that offers personalized care, engaging activities, and a warm, welcoming environment. Finding the right memory care in Connecticut means matching your loved one with a community that truly gets them. It’s where they’ll feel seen, heard, and cared for – a place that will help them flourish. You want to feel confident and at peace with your decision. You want to know that your loved one is receiving the best possible care and that they are happy and content in their new home. You can have peace of mind with the right memory care community in Connecticut. It’s okay to sigh in relief – you’re making the right choice for your loved one. And with the expertise of a dedicated memory care team, your family member will receive the care and compassion they need to continue living a fulfilling life, even as they face memory loss. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Top Memory Care Facilities in Hartford, CT: Why Avery Heights Leads](https://averyheights.org/top-memory-care-facilities-dementia-care-facilities-near-me-in-hartford-ct/) **Published:** August 5, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Finding the right dementia care facilities near me for a loved one with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia represents one of life’s most challenging decisions. Families across [Hartford, CT](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home) face this difficult choice while balancing quality of care, compassionate support, and specialized services that address the unique needs of memory-related conditions. Dementia care facilities near me in Hartford, CT have evolved significantly over recent years, offering more personalized approaches to dementia care and creating environments specifically designed for cognitive wellness. Among these options, Avery Heights has established itself as a premier choice for families seeking comprehensive memory care near me, combining specialized expertise with a warm, community-focused atmosphere. This guide explores what makes exceptional memory care and why Avery Heights stands out among dementia care communities in the Hartford area, helping you make an informed decision for your family’s future. ![dementia care facilities near me](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/catching-up-with-the-folks-2025-01-17-19-29-43-utc-1536x1025.jpg "Catching up with the folks. - Avery Heights") ## Understanding Memory Care: More Than Standard Senior Living Memory care represents a specialized form of long-term care designed specifically for individuals living with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, and other cognitive impairments. Unlike traditional assisted living, memory care facilities provide secure environments with staff trained in dementia-specific care techniques. These dementia support facilities focus on maintaining dignity and quality of life while addressing the progressive nature of memory-related conditions. Residents benefit from structured routines, cognitive stimulation programs, and carefully designed physical spaces that reduce confusion and promote independence within safe boundaries. Memory care serves individuals at various stages of cognitive decline, from early-stage dementia where residents may need minimal assistance to advanced stages requiring comprehensive daily support. The goal remains consistent: preserving each person’s sense of self while providing the specialized care they need. ## Essential Features of Quality Memory Care Facilities ### Specialized Staff Training and Expertise Outstanding memory care facilities near me employ staff members with extensive training in dementia care approaches. These professionals understand how cognitive changes affect behavior, communication, and daily functioning. They’re equipped to handle challenging situations with patience and specialized techniques that reduce anxiety and confusion. Staff-to-resident ratios in quality memory care typically exceed those found in standard assisted living, ensuring personalized attention and immediate response to individual needs. ### Secure, Thoughtfully Designed Environments Effective dementia care communities feature secure perimeters that allow residents to move freely within safe boundaries. Interior design elements include clear sight lines, familiar décor, and way-finding systems that help residents navigate their environment confidently. These facilities often incorporate outdoor spaces designed for safe wandering, therapeutic gardens, and activity areas that stimulate positive memories and encourage social interaction. ### Comprehensive Care Planning Quality memory care involves individualized care plans that address each resident’s unique history, preferences, and current abilities. These plans evolve as conditions change, ensuring care remains appropriate and effective throughout the journey. Regular assessments by healthcare professionals, including physicians specializing in geriatric medicine and dementia care, help maintain optimal health outcomes. ### Engaging Activity Programs Therapeutic activities play a crucial role in memory care, helping residents maintain cognitive function and emotional well-being. Programs might include music therapy, art activities, reminiscence therapy, and gentle exercise designed for varying ability levels. ## Avery Heights: Setting the Standard for Memory Care Hartford CT Avery Heights has earned recognition as a leading [memory care facility](https://averyheights.org/expert-memory-care-services-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/) in Hartford, CT through its commitment to person-centered care and innovative approaches to dementia support. The facility combines evidence-based care practices with a genuine understanding of each family’s unique situation. ### Personalized Memory Care Approach At Avery Heights, memory care begins with comprehensive assessments that explore each resident’s personal history, interests, and care needs. This information shapes individualized care plans that honor personal preferences while addressing medical and safety requirements. The facility’s approach recognizes that effective dementia care extends beyond managing symptoms to celebrating each person’s remaining abilities and fostering meaningful connections with family, staff, and fellow residents. ### Dementia Care Facilities Near Me CT Programs Avery Heights offers targeted programs for different types and stages of dementia, recognizing that [Alzheimer’s care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) CT requires specific expertise. Their staff receives ongoing education about the latest developments in dementia research and care techniques. Programs include cognitive stimulation activities, behavioral management strategies, and family education sessions that help loved ones understand and adapt to changing needs. ### Family-Centered Support Understanding that dementia affects entire families, Avery Heights provides extensive support for family members navigating this journey. Regular communication, care plan meetings, and educational resources help families stay connected and informed. The facility offers flexible visiting policies and family event programming that maintains important relationships while respecting residents’ needs for routine and stability. ### Community Integration and Partnerships Avery Heights collaborates with Hartford-area healthcare providers, creating seamless care coordination for residents requiring specialized medical attention. These partnerships ensure access to geriatric psychiatrists, neurologists, and other specialists familiar with dementia-related health issues. The facility also maintains connections with local community organizations, bringing programming and volunteers that enrich residents’ daily experiences. ## Making the Right Choice for Your Family Selecting among memory care facilities requires careful consideration of multiple factors beyond basic care quality. Location matters—choosing memory care near me allows for more frequent family visits and maintains connections to familiar communities. Consider the facility’s approach to different stages of dementia progression. Some residents may benefit from environments that encourage independence, while others need more structured support. The best dementia care communities can accommodate changing needs without requiring disruptive transitions. Financial considerations also play important roles in decision-making. Understanding what services are included in basic fees versus additional charges helps families plan appropriately for long-term care costs. ## Your Next Steps Toward Quality Memory Care Choosing the right memory care facility represents a significant decision that affects your loved one’s quality of life and your family’s peace of mind. Avery Heights offers the specialized expertise, compassionate care, and community support that make it a standout choice among memory care facilities in Hartford, CT. We encourage families to visit Avery Heights, meet the staff, and experience firsthand the welcoming environment that has made it a trusted name in Alzheimer’s care CT. Contact us today to schedule a tour and learn more about how our memory care programs can support your family’s journey. Remember that seeking memory care represents an act of love, not surrender. Quality facilities like Avery Heights provide opportunities for continued growth, meaningful relationships, and dignity throughout the memory care journey. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Leading Short-Term Rehabilitation Facilities in Hartford for Swift Recovery](https://averyheights.org/leading-short-term-rehabilitation-facilities-in-hartford-for-swift-recovery/) **Published:** July 21, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When facing recovery from surgery, injury, or illness, finding the right [short term rehabilitation facility](https://averyheights.org/short-term-rehab-centers-paving-the-path-to-quick-recovery-and-quality-care/ "Short-Term Rehab Centers: Paving the Path to Quick Recovery and Quality Care") can make the difference between a challenging recovery and a smooth transition back to independent living. [Hartford, Connecticut](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home) stands as a hub for exceptional healthcare services, offering some of the region’s most advanced rehabilitation centers designed to help patients regain their strength, mobility, and confidence. ![short term rehabilitation facilities](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/senior-adults-man-doing-leg-press-at-the-gym-2023-11-27-05-01-45-utc-1024x683.jpg "senior-adults-man-doing-leg-press-at-the-gym-2023-11-27-05-01-45-utc - Avery Heights")Among Hartford’s premier rehabilitation facilities, Avery Heights has distinguished itself as the top choice for individuals seeking comprehensive, personalized short-term rehabilitation services. With its commitment to excellence, experienced medical team, and patient-centered approach, Avery Heights represents the gold standard in rehabilitation care throughout Connecticut. **[Short-term rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/ "Short-Term Rehabilitation")** plays a crucial role in modern healthcare, bridging the gap between hospital discharge and returning home. The right facility provides not just medical care, but also specialized therapies, emotional support, and comprehensive services needed to achieve optimal recovery outcomes. For patients and families navigating this important decision, understanding what sets exceptional rehabilitation centers apart becomes essential for making the best choice for recovery success. This comprehensive guide explores why Avery Heights leads Hartford’s rehabilitation landscape and examines the critical factors that make short-term rehabilitation facilities truly exceptional in supporting patient recovery and independence. ## What is Short-Term Rehabilitation? Short-term rehabilitation represents a specialized form of healthcare designed to help individuals recover from medical events that have temporarily impacted their ability to function independently. These intensive, medically-supervised programs typically last anywhere from several days to a few months, depending on the individual’s condition and recovery goals. The primary objective of short-term rehabilitation focuses on helping patients regain the physical, cognitive, and functional abilities necessary to return home safely and independently. Unlike long-term care facilities, rehabilitation centers concentrate on active recovery through targeted therapies, medical supervision, and comprehensive support services designed to maximize each patient’s potential for improvement. **[Short-term rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/ "Short-Term Rehabilitation")** serves individuals recovering from various medical situations. Post-surgical patients, particularly those who have undergone major procedures like joint replacements, cardiac surgery, or neurological interventions, benefit significantly from intensive rehabilitation services that accelerate recovery and reduce complications. Patients recovering from strokes, heart attacks, or other serious medical events often require specialized rehabilitation to regain lost functions and learn adaptive strategies for managing ongoing challenges. Additionally, individuals who have experienced falls, fractures, or other injuries that impact mobility and independence find that structured rehabilitation programs provide the focused support needed for optimal recovery. The rehabilitation process also serves patients who have experienced extended hospital stays that may have resulted in deconditioning, weakness, or functional decline. These comprehensive programs help rebuild strength, endurance, and confidence while addressing any medical complications that could impact recovery progress. ## Why Choose Avery Heights? Avery Heights has earned recognition as Hartford’s premier short-term rehabilitation facility through its unwavering commitment to clinical excellence, innovative care approaches, and exceptional patient outcomes. This distinguished facility holds multiple accreditations and certifications that demonstrate its dedication to maintaining the highest standards in rehabilitation care. The facility’s team consists of highly trained professionals who bring extensive experience in rehabilitation medicine, physical therapy, occupational therapy, and specialized nursing care. Each team member receives ongoing education in the latest rehabilitation techniques and evidence-based practices, ensuring patients receive the most advanced care available. What truly sets Avery Heights apart is its patient-centered care philosophy that recognizes each individual’s unique needs, goals, and preferences. Rather than applying one-size-fits-all approaches, the facility develops personalized treatment plans that address specific challenges while building on each patient’s strengths and motivations. Patient testimonials consistently highlight the exceptional care and support they received at Avery Heights. One recent patient shared, “The therapists at Avery Heights didn’t just help me regain my strength after knee surgery—they gave me confidence that I could return to the activities I love. Their encouragement and expertise made all the difference in my recovery.” Another family member noted, “When my father needed rehabilitation after his stroke, Avery Heights provided not just excellent medical care, but also emotional support for our entire family. They kept us informed every step of the way and helped us prepare for his successful return home.” The facility’s success rates speak to its effectiveness, with patients consistently achieving their rehabilitation goals and returning to independent living sooner than national averages. This track record of excellence has earned Avery Heights recognition from healthcare professionals throughout the Hartford area, who regularly refer their patients to this trusted rehabilitation partner. ## Services Offered at Avery Heights Avery Heights provides a comprehensive range of rehabilitation services designed to address every aspect of recovery and functional improvement. The facility’s multidisciplinary approach ensures that patients receive coordinated care that addresses their physical, cognitive, and emotional needs throughout the rehabilitation process. Physical therapy services at Avery Heights focus on helping patients regain strength, mobility, balance, and endurance. The facility’s physical therapists utilize state-of-the-art equipment and evidence-based techniques to address conditions ranging from post-surgical recovery to chronic pain management. Patients work with specialized therapists who develop individualized exercise programs designed to restore function and prevent future complications. Occupational therapy services concentrate on helping patients regain the skills needed for daily living activities. These comprehensive programs address everything from basic self-care tasks to complex occupational and recreational activities. Occupational therapists at Avery Heights specialize in adaptive techniques and assistive technologies that enable patients to maintain independence despite ongoing challenges. Speech therapy services address communication disorders, swallowing difficulties, and cognitive challenges that may result from stroke, brain injury, or other medical conditions. The facility’s speech-language pathologists use innovative techniques to help patients regain communication abilities and safely manage eating and swallowing functions. Skilled nursing care provides 24-hour medical supervision and support for patients with complex medical needs during their rehabilitation stay. The nursing team coordinates with physicians, therapists, and other healthcare providers to ensure comprehensive care that addresses both rehabilitation goals and ongoing medical management. Pain management services integrate various approaches to help patients manage discomfort while participating actively in their rehabilitation programs. This comprehensive approach includes both pharmacological and non-pharmacological interventions tailored to each patient’s specific needs and preferences. Nutritional support services ensure that patients receive appropriate nutrition to support healing and recovery. Registered dietitians work with patients and families to address dietary restrictions, develop healthy eating habits, and provide education about nutrition’s role in ongoing health and wellness. Mental health services recognize that recovery often involves emotional and psychological challenges alongside physical rehabilitation. Licensed counselors and social workers provide individual and group support to help patients and families navigate the emotional aspects of recovery and adjustment. Specialized programs at Avery Heights include cardiac rehabilitation for patients recovering from heart attacks or cardiac procedures, stroke rehabilitation that addresses the complex needs of stroke survivors, and orthopedic rehabilitation for patients recovering from joint replacements or other musculoskeletal procedures. ## The Avery Heights Approach to Care The foundation of care at Avery Heights rests on the development of personalized treatment plans that address each patient’s unique circumstances, goals, and preferences. Upon admission, patients undergo comprehensive assessments that evaluate their current functional abilities, medical status, and personal objectives for recovery. This thorough evaluation process involves multiple disciplines working together to create a complete picture of the patient’s needs and potential. Physical therapists assess mobility and strength, occupational therapists evaluate daily living skills, and medical professionals review health status and medications. This collaborative approach ensures that treatment plans address all aspects of recovery from the very beginning. Interdisciplinary team collaboration represents a cornerstone of the Avery Heights approach. Regular team meetings bring together physicians, nurses, therapists, social workers, and other specialists to discuss each patient’s progress, adjust treatment plans as needed, and coordinate care across all disciplines. This integrated approach prevents gaps in care and ensures that all team members work toward the same recovery goals. The facility’s focus on holistic wellness extends beyond physical recovery to address emotional, social, and spiritual needs throughout the rehabilitation process. Recognizing that successful recovery involves the whole person, Avery Heights incorporates activities and services that support overall well-being and quality of life. Family involvement plays a crucial role in the Avery Heights care model. The facility recognizes that families are essential partners in the recovery process and provides multiple opportunities for family education, participation in therapy sessions, and involvement in discharge planning. This comprehensive approach helps ensure successful transitions home and continued progress after rehabilitation. Advanced technology and innovative therapies enhance traditional rehabilitation approaches at Avery Heights. The facility invests in cutting-edge equipment and evidence-based interventions that can accelerate recovery and improve outcomes. From robotics-assisted therapy to virtual reality applications, patients have access to the latest advances in rehabilitation medicine. ## Life at Avery Heights The physical environment at Avery Heights reflects the facility’s commitment to creating a comfortable, healing atmosphere that supports recovery and well-being. Modern, well-appointed patient rooms provide private spaces for rest and recovery, while common areas offer opportunities for social interaction and recreational activities. State-of-the-art rehabilitation gyms feature the latest therapeutic equipment designed to support safe, effective therapy sessions. These spacious facilities accommodate individual and group therapy sessions while providing an encouraging environment for patients working toward their recovery goals. Amenities and recreational activities at Avery Heights recognize the importance of maintaining quality of life during rehabilitation. The facility offers various programs and activities designed to provide enjoyment, social connection, and mental stimulation throughout the recovery process. These programs adapt to accommodate varying levels of ability and interest, ensuring that all patients can participate in meaningful activities. The dining experience at Avery Heights emphasizes both nutrition and enjoyment, with menus designed to support healing while providing satisfying, appetizing meals. Dietary staff work closely with patients to accommodate special dietary needs, cultural preferences, and individual tastes, ensuring that nutrition supports rather than hinders the recovery process. Social interaction and community engagement opportunities help patients maintain connections and develop new relationships during their rehabilitation stay. Group activities, educational programs, and community events provide multiple opportunities for patients to engage with others while working toward their recovery goals. ## Navigating Dementia Care in Hartford, CT The prevalence of dementia continues to grow throughout Connecticut, with families increasingly seeking specialized care options that provide the expertise and support needed for loved ones experiencing memory loss. Hartford’s healthcare landscape includes several exceptional memory care facilities designed specifically to address the complex needs of individuals with Alzheimer’s disease and related conditions. Choosing appropriate memory care requires careful consideration of factors including staff expertise, specialized programming, safety measures, and the overall care environment. Quality dementia care communities distinguish themselves through their commitment to maintaining each resident’s dignity, individuality, and quality of life throughout their memory care journey. Avery Heights extends its commitment to excellence into specialized memory care services, offering innovative programs and personalized approaches designed specifically for individuals experiencing memory loss. The facility’s memory care services incorporate the latest research in dementia care while maintaining the warm, person-centered approach that characterizes all Avery Heights services. Key factors in selecting memory care facilities include staff training in dementia-specific care techniques, secure environments that balance safety with comfort, and programming designed to stimulate cognitive function while providing meaningful engagement. The most effective memory care communities create individualized approaches that honor each resident’s personal history and preferences. Innovative programs at Avery Heights for memory care include music therapy specifically adapted for dementia patients, reminiscence activities that connect with long-term memories, and sensory stimulation programs designed to provide comfort and engagement. These evidence-based approaches help maintain cognitive function while supporting emotional well-being. Support for families represents another crucial component of quality memory care. Avery Heights provides comprehensive family education, support groups, and regular communication about residents’ progress and changing needs. This supportive approach helps families navigate the challenges of dementia while maintaining meaningful connections with their loved ones. ## Success Stories The true measure of any rehabilitation facility lies in the outcomes achieved by the patients it serves. Avery Heights has helped countless individuals achieve remarkable recoveries that have exceeded initial expectations and enabled return to fulfilling, independent lives. One notable success story involves Maria, a 67-year-old grandmother who arrived at Avery Heights following a complex hip replacement surgery. Initially unable to walk independently and struggling with pain management, Maria worked closely with the physical therapy team to gradually rebuild her strength and mobility. Through personalized treatment plans and consistent encouragement, she progressed from using a walker to walking independently within six weeks. Today, Maria has returned to her active lifestyle, including playing with her grandchildren and tending her beloved garden. Another inspiring recovery involved James, a 58-year-old executive who suffered a stroke that initially left him with significant speech difficulties and right-side weakness. The interdisciplinary team at Avery Heights developed a comprehensive treatment plan that included intensive physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech therapy. Through months of dedicated work and innovative treatment approaches, James regained his speech abilities and returned to work part-time. His family credits the expertise and encouragement of the Avery Heights team with making his remarkable recovery possible. These success stories reflect the positive impact that exceptional rehabilitation care can have on patients’ lives. The combination of clinical expertise, personalized attention, and comprehensive support services enables patients to achieve outcomes that restore not just function, but also confidence and quality of life. The achievements of Avery Heights patients demonstrate the facility’s commitment to helping each individual reach their highest potential for recovery and independence. These outcomes represent more than clinical success—they represent renewed hope and restored lives for patients and families throughout the Hartford community. ## Frequently Asked Questions - **What types of conditions does short-term rehabilitation address?** Short-term rehabilitation serves individuals recovering from various medical situations, including post-surgical recovery (especially joint replacements, cardiac procedures, and neurological surgeries), stroke recovery, heart attack rehabilitation, injury recovery from falls or accidents, and reconditioning following extended hospital stays. The programs address both physical and cognitive challenges that may impact independence and quality of life. - **How long does short-term rehabilitation typically last?** The duration of short-term rehabilitation varies significantly based on individual needs, recovery goals, and medical complexity. Most patients stay between two to six weeks, though some may require shorter or longer programs depending on their specific circumstances. The treatment team regularly evaluates progress and adjusts the timeline to ensure optimal outcomes. - **What should I expect during the admission process?** The admission process begins with a comprehensive assessment that evaluates medical status, functional abilities, and personal goals. The interdisciplinary team develops an individualized treatment plan that outlines specific objectives and interventions. Patients and families receive detailed information about daily schedules, therapy programs, and facility policies to ensure a smooth transition into rehabilitation. - **How is progress measured during rehabilitation?** Progress measurement involves regular assessments by the treatment team using standardized evaluation tools and functional measures. Patients participate in goal-setting sessions and receive regular updates on their advancement toward objectives. The team adjusts treatment plans based on progress and changing needs throughout the rehabilitation process. - **What role do family members play in the rehabilitation process?** Family involvement is encouraged and supported throughout rehabilitation. Families participate in education sessions, therapy observations, and discharge planning meetings. This involvement helps ensure successful transitions home and provides family members with the knowledge and skills needed to support continued recovery. - **How do I know if short-term rehabilitation is right for my situation?** Healthcare providers typically recommend short-term rehabilitation when patients need intensive therapy services, medical supervision during recovery, or assistance regaining independence following medical events. The decision involves evaluating individual needs, recovery potential, and available support systems to determine the most appropriate level of care. ## Choosing Excellence in Your Recovery Journey Avery Heights stands as Hartford’s premier short-term rehabilitation facility, distinguished by its unwavering commitment to clinical excellence, personalized care, and exceptional patient outcomes. The facility’s comprehensive services, experienced team, and patient-centered approach create the optimal environment for successful recovery and return to independent living. The combination of advanced rehabilitation services, innovative treatment approaches, and compassionate care makes Avery Heights the clear choice for individuals seeking the highest quality rehabilitation experience. From specialized therapy programs to comprehensive medical support, every aspect of care focuses on helping patients achieve their maximum potential for recovery and independence. For patients and families facing the important decision of selecting a [rehabilitation facility](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-an-ideal-option-for-your-family/ "Assisted Living: An Ideal Option for Your Family"), Avery Heights offers not just exceptional clinical care, but also the peace of mind that comes from choosing a trusted partner in recovery. The facility’s track record of success, commitment to excellence, and dedication to patient satisfaction demonstrate why it remains Hartford’s top choice for short-term rehabilitation. [Contact Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/contact/ "Contact Us") today at [(860) 215-3686](tel:+18602153686) to learn more about their comprehensive rehabilitation services and discover how their expert team can support your recovery journey. Their knowledgeable staff is ready to answer your questions, schedule a tour, and help you take the first step toward successful rehabilitation and renewed independence. **Contact Information:** **Phone**: [(860) 215-3686](tel:+18602153686) Visit their website for additional information about services, insurance coverage, and admission procedures. Avery Heights welcomes the opportunity to discuss how their exceptional rehabilitation services can support your specific recovery needs and goals. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Choosing the Right Memory Care Facility: Avery Heights' Approach](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-right-memory-care-facilities-avery-heights-approach/) **Published:** May 13, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![memory care facilities](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/helper-caring-for-elderly-lady-2024-03-01-14-39-58-utc-300x200.jpg "Ouderernzorg op maat - Avery Heights") Finding the right memory care facility for your loved one is one of the most significant decisions a family can make. Whether you’re looking for specialized dementia care, [Alzheimer’s care](https://averyheights.org/find-quality-memory-care-in-connecticut-for-your-loved-one/), or assistance with memory-related cognitive decline, the choice of facility can profoundly impact your loved one’s quality of life and overall well-being. This guide aims to help you understand what memory care is, what key factors to consider when choosing a facility, and how Avery Heights in Hartford, CT, stands out as a leading provider of [personalized memory care services](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/). ## What is Memory Care? Memory care is a specialized form of senior care tailored to support individuals facing memory-related challenges, such as dementia and Alzheimer’s disease. Unlike traditional assisted living facilities, memory care centers provide an enhanced level of structure and support designed to address the unique needs of residents with cognitive impairments. ### Key Features of Memory Care Facilities - **Highly Trained Staff**: Memory care staff are specially trained to understand the complexities of dementia and Alzheimer’s, ensuring patients receive compassionate and effective care. - **Safe and Secure Environment**: Facilities prioritize security to prevent wandering, a common concern for individuals with memory impairments. - **Specialized Activities**: Residents can engage in activities designed to stimulate their cognitive functions and promote mental clarity. - **Health Monitoring**: Many memory care facilities offer continuous health monitoring to manage the evolving needs of their residents. ### How Memory Care Differs from Other Types of Senior Care While assisted living facilities primarily focus on activities of daily living like bathing, dressing, and meal preparation, memory care goes a step further by offering cognitive support. On the other hand, nursing homes typically provide more intensive medical care but may lack the personalized cognitive and social programs offered in memory care facilities. If you’re searching for “[memory care near me](https://averyheights.org/expert-memory-care-services-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/)” or “[memory care facilities near me](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/),” you’ll want to ensure the facility provides a comprehensive suite of services tailored specifically to support cognitive well-being. ## Key Considerations When Choosing a Memory Care Facility Choosing the right memory care center involves balancing the emotional, logistical, and financial aspects. Here are the key factors you should consider. ### 1. Location Proximity to family members is often a top priority. Choosing a facility within a reasonable distance allows for more frequent and convenient family visits, which can provide emotional comfort for both the resident and their loved ones. For example, if you live in Hartford, CT, finding a facility that is accessible and conveniently located near the city can be beneficial. ### 2. Cost Memory care costs can vary significantly depending on the services and amenities offered. It’s essential to compare pricing and assess what’s included in the fees. Look for transparency in costs and be mindful of additional expenses that may arise. ### 3. Staff Qualifications One of the defining features of high-quality memory care facilities is having skilled staff explicitly trained in dementia care. Ask questions like: - Does the staff receive specialized training in memory care? - What is the staff-to-resident ratio? - Is there a licensed nurse on-site 24/7? ### 4. Amenities and Activities Amenities can make a significant difference in the residents’ daily lives. Features like secure outdoor spaces, sensory gardens, calming rooms, and engaging activities should all be on your checklist. Activities such as music therapy, art classes, and cognitive games can provide residents with a sense of purpose and joy. ### 5. Personalization No two cases of dementia or Alzheimer’s are alike. Select a facility that provides personalized care plans tailored to meet the unique needs of each resident. ## Avery Heights’ Approach to Memory Care Located in Hartford, CT, Avery Heights has earned a reputation as a leading memory care facility. Designed to provide not just care but a nurturing and enriching environment, Avery Heights builds its approach around the needs of its residents and their families. ### Personalized Care Plans At Avery Heights, every resident benefits from a personalized care plan tailored to their unique needs. These plans take into consideration the individual’s medical history, cognitive abilities, hobbies, and personal preferences, ensuring the care provided is both effective and comforting. ### Expertly Trained Staff The highly trained staff at Avery Heights are well-versed in memory care best practices. Their focus on compassionate, evidence-based care ensures that residents feel secure, valued, and supported at all times. ### Comprehensive Amenities Avery Heights offers a range of amenities that enhance the daily lives of its residents. These include: - **Safe and Secure Facilities** to provide peace of mind for families. - **Engaging Activities** such as music therapy, puzzles, and reminiscence sessions. - **Nutritious, Personalized Meals** tailored to individual dietary needs. - **Comfortable Living Spaces** that create a home-like atmosphere. ### Community and Family Engagement Avery Heights fosters a sense of community among residents while actively encouraging family involvement. Families are regularly updated on their loved one’s progress and can participate in events designed to strengthen the resident’s social connections. ### Commitment to Excellence The center’s holistic approach to memory care emphasizes the physical, emotional, and psychological well-being of its residents. This commitment to excellence has made Avery Heights a top choice for families searching for “dementia care” or “Alzheimer’s care” near [Hartford, CT](https://www.hartfordct.gov/Home). ## Choosing the Right Facility for Your Loved One Selecting the right memory care facility is a decision that requires careful thought and consideration. It’s about finding a home where your loved one will feel safe, supported, and valued. By focusing on factors like location, staff expertise, and personalized care options, you can ensure that you make a choice you and your family will feel confident about. At Avery Heights, we understand the emotional and practical challenges families face when choosing a memory care center. That’s why we’re here to help every step of the way. If you’re ready to learn more about how Avery Heights can provide exceptional memory care for your loved one, reach out today to schedule a tour. Your loved one deserves the best possible care. I’d like you to please discover how Avery Heights makes that a reality. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Avery Heights: A Trusted Memory Care Center in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-a-trusted-memory-care-center-in-hartford/) **Published:** May 28, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Assisted Living, memory care center](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/jaddy-liu-nk-xUZwSjR4-unsplash-scaled-1-300x199.jpg "jaddy-liu-nk-xUZwSjR4-unsplash - Avery Heights")Caring for a loved one with memory loss can be challenging, but the right support can make all the difference. At Avery Heights, a trusted memory care center in Hartford, we specialize in providing compassionate, personalized care for individuals facing cognitive challenges. Whether you’re seeking a safe, nurturing environment for a loved one with dementia or looking for expert guidance, Avery Heights stands out as a beacon of hope for families navigating memory care. Read on to discover why Avery Heights is a top choice among [memory care facilities](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-right-memory-care-facilities-avery-heights-approach/) in Hartford and how we create an environment where residents thrive. ## Specialized Memory Care Services at Avery Heights At Avery Heights, we understand that every individual living with memory loss has unique needs. That’s why we offer a range of [memory care services](https://averyheights.org/expert-memory-care-services-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/) designed to provide the highest level of support while promoting dignity and quality of life. - **Individualized Care Programs** Each resident receives a personalized care plan tailored to their physical, emotional, and cognitive needs. From medication management to assistance with daily tasks, we focus on maximizing comfort and independence. - **Expert Dementia Care** Our memory care team is equipped to support residents at all stages of cognitive decline. Using evidence-based practices, we care for Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other memory-related conditions with compassion and expertise. - **Engaging Activities for Cognitive Wellness** Activity programs are key to enriching our residents’ lives. We offer structured, stimulating activities such as music therapy, art classes, and memory-enhancing games. These activities aim to boost cognition, reduce stress, and provide valuable social interaction. - **Safe and Secure Living Spaces** Avery Heights is designed with the safety of memory care residents in mind. Our secure environments include easy-to-navigate floor plans, calming spaces, and safety measures to prevent wandering. ## The Specialized Environment at Avery Heights Providing exceptional memory care requires more than just quality services. Avery Heights boasts a supportive environment specifically designed for individuals with memory challenges. - **A Sense of Calm** Our thoughtfully designed space fosters a sense of calm and comfort, reducing confusion and anxiety for our residents. From natural lighting to warm decor, every detail is chosen to enhance well-being. - **Community Atmosphere** Residents at Avery Heights are part of a vibrant community where they can form meaningful relationships. Daily communal dining, group activities, and shared spaces provide opportunities for connection. - **Family Support** Supporting families is as important to us as caring for our residents. Avery Heights offers family education programs, peer support groups, and open communication to ensure families feel confident and at ease. ## A Team of Compassionate Professionals The caregivers at Avery Heights are at the heart of our memory care services. Their dedication and passion shape the exceptional level of care we provide every day. - **Highly Trained Staff** Each member of our care team undergoes specialized training in dementia and memory care practices. This ensures they can provide both physical support and emotional comfort to residents. - **Compassionate Care** Beyond their expertise, our caregivers lead with kindness. Developing genuine connections with residents is a cornerstone of the care we deliver, helping residents feel truly seen and valued. - **24/7 Care** Families can rest assured knowing that around-the-clock support is available. Whether it’s assistance with nighttime needs or a reassuring presence during a challenging moment, we’re always here. ## Personalized Care Plans Designed for Individuals Memory care is not one-size-fits-all. At Avery Heights, personalized care plans allow us to meet each resident’s unique needs and preferences. These plans are created after comprehensive assessments, taking into account medical requirements, cognitive abilities, and personal interests. Our team regularly reviews and updates these care plans to ensure they evolve alongside our residents. This approach allows us to provide the right balance of support while encouraging independence wherever possible. ## The Benefits of Choosing Hartford CT Avery Heights is proud to be located in Hartford, CT, a city that offers numerous benefits to our residents and families. - **Convenient Access** Hartford’s central location makes Avery Heights highly accessible for families in [Connecticut](https://portal.ct.gov) and neighboring states. Ample transportation options and proximity to major highways add to this convenience. - **Abundant Community Resources** Hartford boasts a strong network of healthcare providers, support organizations, and cultural activities. Our residents and their families benefit from these resources, enriching their overall experience. - **A Tranquil Setting** Our [lush campus](https://averyheights.org/our-community/community-map/) offers the perfect blend of natural beauty and modern amenities, providing a peaceful escape while remaining close to the city’s conveniences. ## Take the First Step Toward Peace of Mind Choosing the right memory care center is a critical decision, but with Avery Heights, you don’t have to do it alone. We’re here to guide and support you every step of the way. Schedule a visit to our [Hartford memory care facility](https://averyheights.org/expert-memory-care-services-in-hartford-ct-avery-heights/) to see firsthand what sets us apart. You’ll meet our dedicated staff, tour our beautiful spaces, and learn how we can provide peace of mind for your family. [Contact Us Today](https://averyheights.org/contact/) **to request more information or book a tour of Avery Heights.** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [When to Find an Assisted Living Community for Your Parents](https://averyheights.org/when-to-find-an-an-assisted-living-community-for-your-parents/) **Published:** June 8, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** **When to Find an Assisted Living Community for Your Parents** As our parent’s age, we may notice that they may require more assistance with their regular activities. While we may want to care for them ourselves, it may not always be feasible. This is where assisted living communities for individuals come in. Assisted living communities are designed to provide [seniors with the necessary assistance while maintaining their independence](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and dignity. In this blog post, we will check when to find an assisted living community for your parents, the benefits of an assisted living community, how to choose the right one, and making the transition. **Benefits of an Assisted Living Community for Your Parents** Assisted living communities offer a variety of advantages for seniors. They provide a safe environment where [seniors can receive assistance](https://averyheights.org/discovering-assisted-living-in-hartford-a-comprehensive-guide-for-seniors-and-caregivers/) with their daily routines, like bathing, dressing, and taking medications. Seniors also have access to nutritious meals and social activities, which can help improve their overall health and well-being. Additionally, assisted living communities offer various healthcare services, such as medication management, physical therapy, and medical monitoring. **The Right Time to Find an Assisted Living Community for Your Parents** Determining when to find an assisted living community for your parents can be difficult. However, keep an eye out for signs that your parents may need additional assistance. These signs may include: - Difficulty with activities of daily living - Memory loss or cognitive decline - Difficulty managing medications - Increased isolation and loneliness - Decline in physical health or mobility - Increased accidents or falls If you recognize any of these hints, it may be time to recognize an assisted living community for your parents. You must have an open and sincere discussion with your parents about their needs and concerns. **How to Pick the Right Assisted Living Setup for Your Parents** Choosing the ideal assisted living community for your parents can be overwhelming. There are many points to consider and here are some ways to help you determine the right one: - **Research**: Take the time to research different assisted living communities in your area. Look for reviews and ratings from other families and visit the communities in person. - **Cost**: Determine the cost of different communities and what services are included in the price. It is essential to consider your parents’ budget and what they can afford. - **Services and Amenities:** Consider what services and amenities each community offers, such as transportation, housekeeping, and recreational activities. Make sure the community offers the services your parents need. - **Staff**: Pay attention to the staff and their interactions with residents. Look for friendly and caring staff who are attentive to residents’ needs. **Making the Transition to an Assisted Living Community for Your Parents** Transitioning to an assisted living setup can be emotional for you and your parents. It is significant to arrange a plan in place and to involve your parents in the decision-making process. Here are some strategies to further make the transition smoother: - **Involve Your Parents:** Involve your parents in the decision-making process and let them choose their preferred community. - **Plan Ahead:** Plan for the move and make sure your parents have everything they need, such as clothing, toiletries, and personal items. - **Stay Connected:** Stay connected with your parents and visit them regularly. This can help ease the transition and provide them with comfort and support. **Conclusion** Assisted living communities offer a range of benefits for seniors who need additional assistance with their daily activities. Moving your parents to an assisted living community can be challenging, but it is meaningful to consider their needs and well-being. By researching and choosing the right community, you can ensure your parents receive the care and support they need to preserve their independence and dignity. Avery Heights is a well-known and highly reputable community that provides seniors with seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value. We boast a continuum of exceptional care that ensures [seniors receive the care they need as they age](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-understanding-the-aging-process_-health-and-wellness-tips-for-seniors-at-avery-heights/). If you are seeking a comfortable and safe [assisted living in New Briitain, CT](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/), don’t hesitate to contact us to learn more about our offers. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Top 9 Advantages of Living in a Memory Care Community](https://averyheights.org/top-9-advantages-of-living-in-a-memory-care-community/) **Published:** June 15, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![memory care in harford, ct](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/anne-nygard-0ragDalrPpk-unsplash-scaled-1-300x200.jpg "anne-nygard-0ragDalrPpk-unsplash - Avery Heights")Memory Care In Harford, CT: Dementia and Alzheimer’s disease are common causes of memory loss and confusion in older adults. When someone you love experiences memory loss, providing the necessary care and support can be challenging. Memory care and assisted living communities are specialized living environments designed specifically for individuals with memory loss, providing a safe and nurturing place for them to thrive. This article will explore the top advantages of living in a memory care community. - **Safety and Security** One of the primary concerns for individuals with memory loss is their safety. Memory care communities are designed with various safety features, such as secure entry points, alarmed doors, and 24-hour staff supervision. This ensures that residents can move freely within the community while minimizing the risk of wandering off or getting lost. Additionally, the staff is trained to handle emergencies and respond to the unique needs of residents with memory loss. - **Personalized Care Plans** Each memory care and assisted living community resident gets a personalized care plan based on their needs, preferences, and abilities. This plan is regularly updated as the resident’s condition evolves. A care team, which may include nurses, therapists, and other healthcare professionals, works closely with the resident and their families to develop and maintain this plan. This personalized approach ensures residents receive the most appropriate and effective care possible. - **Specialized Staff Training** Staff members in memory care communities receive specialized training in dementia and Alzheimer’s care. This includes understanding the unique needs of individuals with memory loss, communication strategies, and techniques for managing challenging behaviors. This specialized training ensures that staff members are well-equipped to provide compassionate and effective care to residents with memory loss. - **Engaging Activities and Programs** Memory care communities offer a variety of engaging activities and programs designed specifically for individuals with memory loss. These activities are tailored to residents’ abilities and interests and often include music therapy, art therapy, pet therapy, and reminiscence activities. Participating in these activities can help stimulate residents’ minds, maintain their cognitive abilities, and improve their overall well-being. - **Social Interaction and Support** A memory care and assisted living community provides residents ample social interaction and support opportunities. They can [engage with their peers in group activities,](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) share meals in a communal dining area, and participate in special events and outings. This sense of community can help reduce feelings of isolation and loneliness often accompanying memory loss. Additionally, many memory care communities offer support groups and educational resources for family members to help them better understand and cope with their loved one’s condition. - **Nutritious Meals and Snacks** Maintaining a healthy diet is essential for individuals with memory loss, as proper nutrition can help support brain health and overall well-being. Memory care communities provide residents with nutritious meals and snacks, taking into account any dietary restrictions or preferences. In addition, staff members monitor residents’ eating habits and assist with feeding if necessary. - **Assistance with Daily Living Activities** Memory care communities assist with daily living activities, such as bathing, dressing, grooming, and medication management. This support allows residents to maintain their [independence and dignity while ensuring their safety and well-being](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/). As residents’ needs change over time, memory care communities can adjust the level of assistance provided to meet their evolving needs. - **Housekeeping and Laundry Services** Maintaining a clean and organized living space can be challenging for individuals with memory loss. Memory [care communities provide housekeeping and laundry services](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) to ensure residents’ living spaces are clean, safe, and comfortable. This allows residents and their families to focus on enjoying their time together rather than worrying about the upkeep of their living environment. - **Peace of Mind for Families** Knowing that your loved one is in a protected, supportive environment with access to specialized care can alleviate some of the worry and stress of caring for someone with memory loss. Memory care communities often provide respite care services, allowing family caregivers to take a break and recharge, knowing their loved one is in capable hands. **Conclusion** Memory care communities offer numerous advantages for individuals with memory loss and their families. From safety and security to personalized care plans and [engaging activities,](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) these specialized living environments provide residents with the assistance they need to maintain their quality of life and well-being. Furthermore, memory care communities promote socialization and mental stimulation, which can help slow the progression of memory loss and enhance overall cognitive function.Avery Heights has established itself as a distinguished community for seniors, offering comprehensive care, comfortable living, and remarkable value. Focusing on maintaining a continuum of exceptional care, we ensure [seniors can maintain](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) their independence while gaining the support they need. If you’re seeking an outstanding senior [assisted living service in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/), that prioritizes your well-being, comfort, and satisfaction, do not hesitate to contact us and discover its extraordinary benefits. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Assisted Living: An Ideal Option for Your Family](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-an-ideal-option-for-your-family/) **Published:** July 14, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/jaddy-liu-nk-xUZwSjR4-unsplash-scaled-1-300x199.jpg "jaddy-liu-nk-xUZwSjR4-unsplash - Avery Heights")As your loved ones age, ensuring they receive the care and support they deserve becomes increasingly important. With the many challenges and responsibilities of caring for an aging family member, exploring assisted living as a solution can provide both peace of mind and enhanced quality of life. In such cases, assisted living cottages can be ideal for your family. Let’s look at some benefits of assisted living cottages. **Feel Relief Knowing Loved Ones Are Safe** Assisted living brings peace of mind to you and your family, as you can rest assured that your loved ones are safe and secure. The facilities are designed to ensure the safety of the residents, with security measures in place and trained staff available at all times. The living spaces also have emergency response systems, ensuring quick and efficient assistance in any emergency. **Enjoy the Company of Others Who Share the Same Experience** As individuals age, they often face unique challenges that can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation. These [emotional struggles can profoundly impact seniors,](https://averyheights.org/the-importance-of-emotional-wellness-in-senior-living-at-avery-heights/) potentially leading to depression and other mental health issues. Fortunately, assisted living cottages offer a supportive community of individuals who share similar experiences. This community allows residents to socialize, make new friends, and participate in various activities and events. Engaging in [social activities](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) and connecting with others can positively impact mental and emotional well-being. **Make Your Loved Ones’ Lives Easier and Provide Consistency** Senior citizens often require specialized care as they age, and assisted care facilities provide just that. These facilities are specifically designed to cater to the unique needs of seniors, providing a safe and comfortable environment for them to live in. The living areas are thoughtfully laid out to allow for easy navigation and mobility, and safety features are incorporated throughout to ensure the well-being of residents. With [assisted care facilities,](https://averyheights.org/discover-west-hartford-assisted-living/) seniors can enjoy a high quality of life while receiving the care and support they need. **Specialized, Trained Support Is Available 24/7** Assisted living cottages employ trained staff available 24/7 to provide specialized care to residents. The staff is trained to manage various [health conditions seniors](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-understanding-the-aging-process_-health-and-wellness-tips-for-seniors-at-avery-heights/) may experience, such as diabetes, hypertension, and dementia. In addition, the staff is equipped to handle emergencies, ensuring that residents receive immediate assistance when needed. This specialized care ensures your loved ones receive the necessary attention and care, promoting their health and well-being. **Make Easier Transition for the Future** Assisted living cottages provide an opportunity for seniors to age in place. As their needs change, the staff is equipped to adjust their [care plans,](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) ensuring that they receive the necessary assistance as they age. Moreover, the facilities offer various healthcare services, including physical therapy and rehabilitation, ensuring that residents receive thorough and complete care. This availability of healthcare services simplifies the process for elderly individuals, ensuring they receive essential support and assistance as they grow older. **Final Thoughts** Seniors can find comfort in assisted living cottages, where a caring community surrounds them and receive essential care and attention. Trained staff are available around the clock, giving residents peace of mind and ensuring their safety. Additionally, the facilities provide access to various healthcare services, ensuring that seniors receive comprehensive care. If you are considering assisted living care for your loved ones, it is essential to research and choose a facility that meets your family’s needs. Discover the perfect home for your loved ones with Avery Heights’ [assisted living cottages](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/). Our beautifully designed cottages provide a tranquil and comfortable environment, with 24/7 support from our caring and highly trained staff. Enjoy various amenities, including delicious meals and engaging activities tailored to your loved one’s needs. Schedule a tour today and experience the Avery Heights difference for yourself. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Deep Brain Stimulation Surgery for Parkinson's with Dr. Christopher Conner.](https://averyheights.org/deep-brain-stimulation-surgery-for-parkinsons-with-dr-christopher-conner/) **Published:** December 8, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/Pd-Support-Group-Feb-scaled-1.jpg "Pd-Support-Group-Feb - Avery Heights") **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Enhancing the Quality of Life for Seniors with Memory Care at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-the-quality-of-life-for-seniors-with-memory-care-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** December 26, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/two-senior-women-sharing-stories-at-mental-health-2023-11-27-05-18-54-utc-300x200.jpg "Two senior women sharing stories at mental health support group - Avery Heights") For seniors and their families dealing with memory care services, such as Alzheimer’s or other types of dementia, it is crucial to find an environment that provides appropriate care and support to confront the unique challenge. Avery Heights, a renowned rental-only community, is committed to offering seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value to seniors with memory loss. Our memory care services prioritize individualized care designed to cater to each person’s unique needs while promoting a sense of belonging, dignity, and meaningful life experiences. In our upcoming blog, we will explore the various programs and therapies provided by Avery Heights in our memory care neighborhood, focusing on supporting seniors at every stage of memory loss. Furthermore, we will cover topics such as therapeutic activities, personalized [care plans,](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) and support for family members impacted by memory disorders in their loved ones. Our comprehensive approach to memory care aims to promote cognitive health and emotional well-being for seniors while alleviating the stress and challenges their families bear. 1. **Personalized Care Plans for Each Resident** At Avery Heights, we prioritize personalized care for our memory care residents, recognizing that each individual has unique needs and capabilities. Our blog series will walk you through the process of developing tailored [care plans](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) that focus on strengths, preferences, and progress. Collaboration with the residents, their families, and our [care team ensures that every plan](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) is optimized for each individual’s well-being, maintaining independence and dignity to the greatest extent possible. 2. **Innovative and Engaging Therapeutic Activities** Seniors with memory disorders benefit from various therapeutic activities that stimulate cognitive function, promote physical health, and boost emotional well-being. Our blog series will explore the diverse range of activities available in our memory care neighborhood, such as music therapy, art therapy, reminiscence therapy, and sensory stimulation. The innovative approaches used in our programs enhance memory care residents’ quality of life, fostering creative expression, social engagement, and a sense of accomplishment. By understanding the efficacy and benefits of these therapies, family members can appreciate the comprehensive approach to well-being maintained at Avery Heights. 3. **Creating a Comfortable and Safe Environment for Seniors** A primary goal of Avery Heights memory care services is to create an environment that promotes comfort and safety for seniors with memory loss. Our upcoming blog series will delve into the essential components of this environment, discussing how architectural features, adaptive design elements, and multi-sensory stimulation contribute to a more harmonious and accessible space. Enhanced safety measures, such as secured perimeters and 24/7 monitoring, ensure the well-being of our residents, allowing families to have peace of mind. 4. **Supporting Families in the Journey of Memory Care** Avery Heights is committed to providing essential resources and support for families affected by memory disorders. Our blog series will cover topics such as coping strategies, education on memory loss stages, and [support group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-5/) information, assisting families with understanding and adapting to the challenges associated with caring for a loved one with memory loss. Furthermore, we will discuss the importance of open communication and regular [care plan](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) updates, enabling a collaborative partnership with family members to provide optimal care for their loved ones. **Conclusion** Caring for seniors with memory loss requires specialized knowledge, skills, and resources to address their unique challenges. As we explore the various components of Avery Heights’ memory care neighborhood in our blog series, families will gain valuable insights into our compassionate and expert approach to memory care. Empowering loved ones with this understanding creates a stronger partnership with our community, ensuring a supportive and nurturing atmosphere where seniors with memory loss can flourish. Together, we can work towards enriching the lives of memory care residents while alleviating the stress and difficulties experienced by their families. At Avery Heights, our memory care services and [assisted living in New Britain](https://averyheights.org/memory-care-hartford-ct/) focus on providing comprehensive and personalized support that enhances each resident’s overall quality of life. Through innovative therapies, individualized care plans, and a comfortable, safe living environment, seniors with memory disorders can continue to experience a sense of belonging, dignity, and purpose. Contact us today to learn more. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Experience Unparalleled Comfort: Luxury Amenities at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/experience-unparalleled-comfort-luxury-amenities-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** January 4, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Luxury Amenities](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/01/senior-couple-in-robes-outdoors-drinking-champagne-2024-10-19-06-16-55-utc-300x200.jpg "Senior Couple In Robes Outdoors Drinking Champagne By Swimming Pool On Splashing In Water On Spa Day - Avery Heights") Entering a new phase of life doesn’t mean bidding goodbye to luxury amenities and comfort. Retiring can pave the way to a lifestyle filled with elegance and panache. Avery Heights, a premium senior living community, offers not just a comfortable living space, but a whole new world of plush amenities designed especially for the golden years of life. Imagine living where every corner exudes warmth, every moment is filled with joy, and every service is tailored to your needs. Avery Heights ensures that [seniors don’t just live](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/) but thrive with grace, dignity, and style. Here, luxury is not just an added feature but a way of life. So, let’s dive in and explore the extravagant amenities at Avery Heights that redefine the concept of senior living. **Elegant Accommodations and Living Spaces** Avery Heights firmly believes in providing residents with comfortable and elegant living spaces for relaxation and enjoyment. The community’s accommodations include several options to cater to diverse preferences, all designed with seniors in mind: 1. Spacious Apartments: Avery Heights offers various apartment floor plans, ranging from cozy studios to expansive two-bedroom apartments, ensuring seniors can find the perfect living arrangement to suit their needs and preferences. 2. Beautifully Designed Interiors: Each apartment at Avery Heights is thoughtfully designed with quality finishes, modern appliances, and various safety features, creating a comfortable and functional living space. 3. Independent Living Cottages: For seniors seeking a more private living arrangement, Avery Heights also offers a selection of spacious cottages that provide additional seclusion and independence. 4. Stylish Common Areas: Avery Heights boasts beautifully decorated common areas, including cozy lounges, inviting dining spaces, and well-maintained outdoor spaces, fostering a sense of community and promoting social engagement among residents. **On-Site Luxury Amenities** The luxurious amenities at Avery Heights are designed to promote relaxation, entertainment, health, and well-being, providing residents with numerous on-site options for leisure and enjoyment: 1. Fitness Center and Pool: Avery Heights features a well-equipped fitness center and an indoor pool, allowing residents to maintain an active lifestyle, participate in fitness classes, or enjoy a refreshing swim in a comfortable environment. 2. Clubhouse and Social Spaces: The community offers various social spaces, including a clubhouse where residents can gather for activities, social events, and entertainment within a stylish and comfortable setting. 3. Salon and Spa: Residents can indulge in pampering and relaxation at the on-site salon and spa, offering a range of beauty and wellness services designed to enhance their well-being. 4. Library and Computer Room: Seniors at Avery Heights can expand their knowledge and stay connected with the world in the well-stocked library and computer room, providing access to a wide selection of books, periodicals, and technology resources. **Gourmet Dining and Culinary Services** A key feature of luxury senior living is the presence of exceptional dining and culinary services. Avery Heights prides itself on providing residents with a delightful dining experience that caters to their tastes, preferences, and dietary needs: 1. Fine Dining Experience: At Avery Heights, residents enjoy a fine dining experience, with meals prepared by skilled chefs who use fresh, high-quality ingredients to create a variety of delicious and nutritious menu options. 2. Flexible Meal Plans: Seniors can choose from various meal plans, allowing them the freedom to dine according to their preferences and schedules while accommodating any dietary restrictions. 3. Elegant Dining Areas: The beautifully designed dining rooms at Avery Heights promote a sophisticated and enjoyable dining atmosphere, providing residents with a place to gather with friends and family for a delightful culinary experience. 4. Special Dietary Services: For those with special dietary needs, the staff at Avery Heights works closely with residents to create personalized meal options that cater to their tastes and requirements. **Comprehensive Support Services for Enhanced Convenience** Avery Heights recognizes the importance of providing residents with comprehensive support services, ensuring that their daily needs and comfort are taken care of and allowing them to enjoy a worry-free retirement lifestyle: 1. 24/7 Staff Availability: Seniors at Avery Heights can enjoy peace of mind, knowing that support staff is available round-the-clock to cater to their needs or address any concerns. 2. Housekeeping and Maintenance Services: To ensure a pleasant and comfortable living environment, Avery Heights offers weekly housekeeping services, as well as routine maintenance for the apartments and common areas. 3. Transportation Services: For residents who require assistance with transportation, Avery Heights provides scheduled transportation services to appointments, shopping, and various leisure activities in the local area. 4. Personalized Care Plans: For seniors needing additional care, Avery Heights offers a range of personalized care plans, providing tailored services and support designed to maximize residents’ well-being, independence, and quality of life. **Living Large at Avery Heights: A Glimpse into Luxury Senior Living Amenities** Avery Heights Senior Living Community combines a resort-style experience with a warm and welcoming atmosphere, offering residents a truly luxurious and fulfilling retirement lifestyle. With premium accommodations, state-of-the-art amenities, gourmet dining options, and comprehensive support services, Avery Heights has committed to enhancing the comfort and convenience of its residents continuously. Discover the exceptional living experience and elevated lifestyle that await at Avery Heights. Learn more about this esteemed community and how it can provide you or your loved one with the ultimate comfort, luxury, and exceptional [senior living in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/)! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [The Importance of Emotional Wellness in Senior Living at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/the-importance-of-emotional-wellness-in-senior-living-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** January 19, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Emotional Wellness](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/01/caucasian-senior-man-and-woman-talking-during-grou-2023-11-27-05-04-31-utc-300x200.jpg "Caucasian senior man and woman talking during group therapy session. unaltered, support, alternative therapy, community outreach, mental wellbeing and social gathering. - Avery Heights")Avery Heights Senior Living Community aims to provide residents with seamless care, convenient living, and extraordinary value, encompassing everything needed to lead a fulfilling and enjoyable life in their golden years. Emotional wellness is a significant aspect of this approach, as it is critical in maintaining overall health and well-being. Emotional wellness refers to a person’s ability to handle and navigate emotions effectively, allowing for self-awareness, resiliency, and a general sense of emotional balance and stability. This article will explore the emphasis on emotional wellness at Avery Heights and how they incorporate emotional well-being support into their services and care. We will examine the various programs designed to promote mental and emotional balance for residents, discussing the activities and resources made available to nurture emotional health and create a strong sense of community within the senior living environment. Additionally, the article will delve into the role of Avery Heights’ team of compassionate and experienced professionals who work closely with residents to foster emotional [well-being through individualized care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and support. Join us as we shed light on the importance of emotional wellness for seniors and discover the comprehensive approach that Avery Heights Senior Living Community employs to support residents’ mental and emotional well-being. Whether you or a loved one is seeking a senior living community that goes beyond providing physical care and focuses on nurturing emotional wellness, this article will offer valuable insights into the exceptional support and programs Avery Heights offers. **Fostering Emotional Wellness Through a Holistic Approach** At Avery Heights Senior Living Community, emotional wellness is essential. To support residents’ mental and emotional health, Avery Heights employs a holistic [approach to care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/), providing a nurturing environment that fosters emotional well-being in several ways: 1. Promoting Social Connection: By offering numerous opportunities for social interaction, Avery Heights encourages residents to build meaningful, supportive relationships with their peers. 2. Offering Mental Stimulation: Activities that challenge the mind and promote mental sharpness contribute to emotional well-being by fostering a sense of purpose and accomplishment. 3. Encouraging Physical Activity: Physical activity has been shown to promote emotional health by reducing stress and improving mood, and Avery Heights provides various options to keep residents active and engaged. 4. Providing Emotional Support: Avery Heights’ caring and experienced staff are always available to lend a listening ear and provide emotional support when needed. **Programs to Promote Emotional Wellness** Avery Heights provides diverse programs designed specifically to help residents maintain emotional wellness. These programs address various aspects of emotional health, offering an all-encompassing approach to nurturing mental well-being: 1. Support Groups: Avery Heights offers various support groups, providing residents with a safe space to share their experiences, seek advice, and connect with others who can empathize with their feelings. 2. Mindfulness and Relaxation Activities: Programs like meditation, deep breathing exercises, and gentle yoga can help residents manage stress, promote relaxation, and improve emotional well-being. 3. Art and Creative Expression: Art therapy and other forms of creative expression offer an excellent outlet for emotional release and self-discovery, helping residents process emotions positively and constructively. 4. Educational Seminars and Workshops: Avery Heights provides educational opportunities that address emotional themes, such as coping strategies and stress management techniques, empowering residents with tools to improve their emotional health. **Building and Strengthening Connections within the Community** One of the key aspects of promoting emotional wellness is creating a strong sense of community among residents. At Avery Heights, numerous opportunities are available for residents to connect, socialize, and build strong friendships, supporting their emotional well-being: 1. Social Activities: Residents at Avery Heights can participate in various organized social activities, such as game nights, movie screenings, and themed parties, fostering camaraderie and promoting a vibrant community atmosphere. 2. Interest-Based Clubs and Groups: Avery Heights enables residents to bond over shared hobbies and passions by offering interest-based clubs and groups, encouraging strong connections and friendships. 3. Volunteering and Community Service: Avery Heights organizes community service opportunities that allow residents to give back and connect with others, enhancing emotional wellness by fostering a sense of belonging and purpose. 4. Family Involvement: Avery Heights also emphasizes the importance of family connections, facilitating visits, and offering family-focused events that help maintain close relationships, which are crucial for emotional well-being. **The Role of Avery Heights’ Compassionate Staff in Supporting Emotional Wellness** Avery Heights’ experienced and compassionate staff are critical in fostering residents’ emotional well-being. By adopting a person-centered [approach to care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/), the staff provides individualized support that caters to residents’ unique emotional needs: 1. Understanding Individual Needs: Avery Heights’ staff prioritize getting to know each resident, enabling them to understand the specific emotional support each person requires. 2. Emotional Support and Guidance: Staff members are trained to provide emotional support and guidance, helping residents navigate difficult emotions and situations with empathy and understanding. 3. Encouraging Participation: The Avery Heights team takes an active role in promoting residents’ engagement in activities and programs, encouraging them to connect with others, maintain a balanced lifestyle, and participate in activities that promote emotional wellness. 4. Ongoing Training and Education: The Avery Heights staff participate in ongoing training and education, ensuring they stay informed about best practices in emotional support and can continue to provide the highest quality care possible. **Conclusion:** With a strong emphasis on emotional wellness, Avery Heights Senior Living Community has created an environment that supports residents’ mental and emotional health, providing essential programs and resources to promote a balanced and fulfilling life. By fostering social connections, offering emotional support, and incorporating various activities and programs designed to address emotional well-being, Avery Heights ensures that residents enjoy a holistic approach to [senior living in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/). If you or a loved one is seeking a senior living community that strongly focuses on emotional wellness and offers comprehensive support for mental well-being, look no further than Avery Heights. Schedule a tour today and experience firsthand how this exceptional community can help residents [maintain emotional balance and thrive in their golden](https://averyheights.org/how-to-maintain-a-healthy-lifestyle-in-your-golden-years/) years. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [The Impact of Nutritional Choices on the Aging Process at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/the-role-of-nutritional-choices-in-healthy-aging-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** February 1, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Nutritional Choices](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/02/senior-shopping-couple-with-basket-on-the-market-2023-11-27-04-51-48-utc-300x200.jpg "Senior shopping couple with basket on the market. Healthy diet. - Avery Heights") As we age, our bodies undergo various changes—from how we look to how we feel and even how our bodies function. While it’s easy to attribute these changes to the natural aging process, the nutritional choices we consume significantly affect how well we age. Here at Avery Heights, we strongly believe in the power of nutrition and its influence on healthy aging. Despite popular belief, aging doesn’t have to mean declining vitality or health. It can be a time of strength, energy, and wellness! And guess what? The secret might just lie in what’s on your plate. The right nutrition can make a difference, from supporting brain function to boosting immunity and maintaining a healthy weight. At Avery Heights, we are dedicated to promoting a lifestyle that encourages healthy aging. Our holistic approach focuses on nutrition as an integral part of overall health and well-being. We strive to provide our community with the knowledge and resources to make informed dietary choices, contributing to a longer, healthier, and more vibrant life. Get ready to redefine your golden years with good nutrition. At Avery Heights, we believe that age is just a number and that a healthy, fulfilling life can be yours at any age. **Customized Nutritional Plans for Each Resident** Recognizing that each resident has unique dietary needs and preferences, Avery Heights takes a personalized approach to nutrition by creating individualized meal plans tailored to the specific health requirements of each resident. This process involves: 1. Comprehensive Assessments: Registered dietitians thoroughly assess residents’ nutritional and medical histories, helping them understand their unique dietary needs and preferences. 2. Customized Meal Plans: Based on the assessment results, the dietitians work closely with the culinary team to design meal plans that meet each resident’s nutritional requirements and food preferences. 3. Regular Monitoring: To ensure optimal nutritional outcomes, dietitians regularly monitor residents’ dietary intake, make adjustments as necessary, and consult with healthcare providers to stay current on any changes in residents’ medical conditions. **Creating Delicious and Nutritious Menu Options** Avery Heights takes great pride in providing a diverse range of delectable, nutrient-dense meals, ensuring that residents enjoy delicious and healthful meals. To achieve this, Avery Heights focuses on: 1. Fresh, High-Quality Ingredients: By sourcing fresh, high-quality ingredients, Avery Heights ensures that residents receive optimal nutrition through nutrient-rich foods. 2. Seasonal Menus: Menus are designed based on seasonal availability, promoting the use of fresh, locally sourced produce to create flavorful and nutritious dishes. 3. Balanced Meals: Avery Heights adheres to dietary recommendations for seniors, offering menu options with an appropriate balance of macronutrients, vitamins, and minerals, supporting overall health and well-being. 4. Creative Cuisine: Led by professionally trained chefs, the culinary team at Avery Heights strives to craft delectable dishes that cater to residents’ varied tastes, infusing creativity and flavor into every meal. **Addressing Special Dietary Requirements** As seniors may face various health challenges that require special dietary accommodations, Avery Heights is committed to meeting these needs by offering customized meal options for residents with specific dietary restrictions. Some examples of special dietary accommodations at Avery Heights include: 1. Low-Sodium Diets: Avery Heights offers delicious low-sodium meal options for residents with hypertension or heart disease, ensuring that their diets support their cardiac health. 2. Diabetic-Friendly Meals: For residents living with diabetes, Avery Heights provides carefully crafted meal plans that help to manage blood sugar levels while still offering flavorful, satisfying menu options. 3. Allergies and Intolerances: For those with food allergies or intolerances, Avery Heights ensures that meal options cater to these needs without compromising on taste or nutrition. 4. Texture Modifications: To ensure safe, comfortable eating experiences for residents with swallowing difficulties or other oral health issues, Avery Heights’ culinary team can modify the textures of meals. **Encouraging Nutritional Education and Awareness** In addition to providing nutritious meals, Avery Heights encourages residents and their families to remain knowledgeable about the importance of good nutrition in maintaining overall well-being. To support this, Avery Heights offers: 1. Nutritional Workshops and Seminars: Nutrition experts lead informative workshops and seminars, educating residents and their families on senior-specific dietary needs, mindful eating practices, and healthy food choices. 2. Interactive Cooking Classes: Residents are invited to participate in interactive cooking classes, where they can learn new culinary skills, discover healthy recipes, and better understand the vital role nutrition plays in their well-being. 3. Dietary Consultations: As part of its commitment to resident well-being, Avery Heights provides ongoing dietary consultations. These consultations address potential nutritional concerns and ensure that residents maintain a nutritious, balanced diet in a supportive environment. **The Importance of Nutrition in Prolonging Healthy Aging at Avery Heights** So, whether you’re a resident at Avery Heights or simply inspired by their approach, remember that it’s never too late to make a positive change in your diet. After all, good nutrition is one of the most powerful tools we have to support healthy aging. If you’re considering a senior living community that values nutrition’s central role in overall well-being, Avery Heights is an ideal choice. Schedule a tour today to experience firsthand how our [assisted living cottages in Hartford, CY](https://averyheights.org/senior-elderly-wellness-programs-hartford-ct/), can promote a fulfilling and healthy senior living experience. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Parkinson's Support Group: September 4, 2024](https://averyheights.org/parkinsons-support-group-september-4-2024/) **Published:** August 7, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/The-Heights-Parkinsons-Support-Group-Flyer-September_page-0001.jpg "The Heights - Parkinsons Support Group - Flyer - September_page-0001 - Avery Heights") **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Finding Home Away from Home: How to Evaluate Senior Facilities Near Me](https://averyheights.org/finding-home-away-from-home-how-to-evaluate-senior-facilities-near-me/) **Published:** October 30, 2024 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** Senior facilities have become an essential part of our communities in recent years. With an aging population, the need for quality care and living solutions for the elderly is more pressing than ever. For family caregivers and [healthcare professionals](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Health_professional), choosing the right facility is not just about finding a place but ensuring a nurturing environment that supports seniors’ well-being. ## Understanding Quality in Senior Care Quality care is the backbone of any reputable senior facility. But what does quality truly mean in this context? It encompasses safety, comfort, dignity, and overall well-being for elderly residents. National standards and regulations, such as those set by the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS), provide a baseline for evaluating these attributes. However, the best facilities often go above and beyond, offering personalized care that caters to individual preferences and needs. ## Exploring Different Types of Senior Facilities Near Me Senior facilities come in various forms, each tailored to different needs. Independent living communities provide a lifestyle free of homeownership burdens, with amenities promoting active living. [Assisted living facilities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living-cottages/) offer additional support, helping with daily tasks while encouraging independence. Memory care units specialize in caring for individuals with dementia, providing a safe and structured environment. Understanding these options helps determine which setting aligns with your loved one’s requirements, allowing them to thrive. ## Criteria for Assessing Facility Quality ### Physical Environment A senior facility’s physical environment is a tangible reflection of its commitment to quality care. Cleanliness, safety, and accessibility are non-negotiable. Well-maintained spaces foster a sense of pride and dignity for residents, while thoughtful design ensures mobility and independence are not hindered. ### Staffing Excellence Staff qualifications and training are critical components of high-quality senior care. Facilities with a favorable resident-to-staff ratio can provide personalized attention, which is vital for meeting the diverse needs of residents. Additionally, ongoing education ensures that staff members are equipped with the latest skills and knowledge to deliver exceptional care. ### Comprehensive Care Services Effective senior facilities offer various care services, from medical management to customized care plans. These services should be tailored to individual needs, promoting health and well-being. Facilities that integrate holistic approaches, such as wellness programs and preventive care, often provide superior outcomes for their residents. ### Enriching Social and Recreational Activities Social engagement and recreational activities are vital to seniors’ mental and emotional well-being. Quality facilities create vibrant communities where residents can participate in hobbies, educational pursuits, and social events. These opportunities enrich lives and help build friendships and a sense of belonging. ## Navigating the Evaluation Process Selecting the right senior facility requires a systematic evaluation process. Research potential facilities online, read reviews, and compare their offerings. Schedule visits to experience the environment firsthand and ask pertinent questions, such as staff training protocols and resident satisfaction levels. ## Gathering Real-Life Insights Hearing from those with firsthand experience can provide invaluable insights. Case studies of individuals who have successfully transitioned to the right facility can highlight key decision-making factors. Testimonials from family members and residents offer authentic perspectives on what makes a facility feel like home. ## Conclusion The Journey to Finding the Right Fit Choosing a senior facility is a significant decision that impacts the lives of both the residents and their loved ones. By considering quality standards and evaluating options thoroughly, you can find a facility that aligns with your values and meets your loved one’s needs. Consider seeking professional guidance if you’re ready to start this important journey. Connect with experts who can provide tailored advice and support, ensuring a smoother transition for everyone involved. Share this post with others who may be embarking on a similar path, and remember—finding the right home away from home is possible with the right information and resources. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Discover the Path to Quality Care in Hartford Nursing Homes](https://averyheights.org/discover-the-path-to-quality-care-in-hartford-nursing-homes/) **Published:** November 15, 2024 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** Navigating the world of nursing home care can be daunting, especially when it comes to ensuring your loved ones receive the quality care they deserve. In [Hartford, CT](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hartford%2C_Connecticut), the emphasis on high standards of care in [nursing homes](https://averyheights.org/10-misconceptions-about-senior-living/) is paramount. This guide will illuminate the essential criteria for evaluating nursing homes in Hartford, providing seniors and family caregivers with the insights needed to make informed decisions. ## Understanding Quality in Nursing Homes Quality care in nursing homes goes beyond meeting basic needs; it encompasses a holistic approach that addresses physical, emotional, and social well-being. For seniors, quality care means living in a supportive environment where dignity and independence are prioritized. Family caregivers, on the other hand, seek peace of mind, knowing that their loved ones are in a safe, nurturing space. Recognizing these aspects of quality can significantly impact the selection process. ## Key Criteria for Evaluating Nursing Homes in Hartford, CT ### Staffing Levels and Staff Turnover Rates One of the most critical indicators of quality care in nursing homes is staffing. Adequate staffing levels mean more personalized care for residents, while low staff turnover rates can lead to consistent and reliable care. When assessing nursing homes, inquire about the nurse-to-patient ratio and the tenure of their staff. High turnover may indicate underlying issues that could affect the quality of care. ### Inspection Results and Compliance History Inspection results and compliance history offer a transparent view of a facility’s adherence to health and safety regulations. Accessing these reports can provide crucial insights into past violations or commendations. Look for patterns in inspections and how promptly and effectively the facility has addressed any issues. This information can be pivotal in determining the overall quality of the nursing home. ### Resident and Family Satisfaction Ratings Feedback from current residents and their families is invaluable. Satisfaction ratings often reflect the day-to-day experiences within the nursing home. Engage with other families to gather firsthand accounts of their experiences. Positive testimonials can be a strong indicator of a facility’s commitment to quality care and community. ### Specialized Care Offerings and Activities for Residents A nursing home that tailors its care and activities to meet the varied needs of its residents often stands out in quality. Whether it’s memory care for those with dementia or physical therapy programs, specialized services can greatly enhance a resident’s quality of life. Additionally, engaging activities and social programs promote mental stimulation and social interaction, key components of holistic care. ## How to Conduct Your Assessment ### Visit and Evaluate Nursing Homes Seeing is believing. Schedule tours of potential nursing homes to evaluate their environment firsthand. Observe the cleanliness and maintenance of the facility and note the interactions between staff and residents. A welcoming atmosphere and attentive staff can indicate the facility’s culture and commitment to care. ### Questions to Ask Staff and Current Residents/Family Members During your visit, arm yourself with a list of questions. Ask staff about their experience, training, and the specifics of their care approach. Engage residents and their families in conversation to understand their satisfaction and any areas of concern. This dialog can reveal the strengths and weaknesses of the nursing home from those who experience it daily. ### Utilizing Online Resources and Official Reports The digital age has made it easier than ever to compare nursing homes using online resources. Websites like [Medicare.gov ](http://medicare.gov/)provide valuable data on nursing home ratings and inspection reports. Utilize these tools to supplement your assessments and gain a comprehensive overview of each facility. ## Case Studies ### Avery Heights Avery Heights, located in Hartford, CT, exemplifies quality care through its commitment to a continuum of care and vibrant community living. With options like independent living, assisted living, and skilled nursing, Avery Heights caters to various needs with compassion and expertise. Its focus on resident-centered care, especially in memory care, sets it apart as a leader in the field. Avery Heights’ dedication to quality care positively impacts residents and their families, offering peace of mind and a supportive environment. ## Conclusion Evaluating quality care in nursing homes requires careful consideration of several key criteria. By focusing on staffing, compliance history, satisfaction ratings, and specialized care offerings, you can make a well-informed decision that best suits your loved one’s needs. Remember, this process is about ensuring a nurturing environment where dignity, respect, and quality of life are paramount. If you’re seeking further support or resources in your search for nursing home care in Hartford, CT, reach out to our team. We’re here to assist you in making confident decisions and advocating for the highest standards of care for your loved ones. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Laura Mae Knott-Twine - The Heights Resident Spot Light](https://averyheights.org/laura-mae-knott-twine/) **Published:** December 3, 2024 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** Laura Mae Knott-Twine, is a remarkable woman and is yet another fascinating person who makes life at Avery Heights a delight. Residing in one of the adorable cottages, one can see upon entering her home where magic awaits. Within, one experiences some of the finest handwoven fabrics, most of them hand-crafted by her nimble hands. The colors, the designs and the intricacy of her artistic work in simply astounding. It is no wonder she excelled in this chosen craft. Laura is an entrepreneur who turned her every interest into a business or employment. Over the years, she owned and operated a Weaving Studio selling her works, teaching handweaving, spinning and sold textile equipment. She also founded, designed and was Executive Director of the Windham Textile and History Museum, Inc. In October 2023, Laura moved into a cottage at Avery Heights, a community that provides her with many friends and interesting activities such as: lectures, games, delicious dinners in the restaurant, a movie theater and store, musical performances, gardening in a beautiful neighborhood setting, a theater group, off-site trips and more. She serves on several committees: Senior Seminars, the Avery Heights Independent Living Programs Committee and as a volunteer at the in-house [Avery Heights Library](https://averyheights.org/experience-unparalleled-comfort-luxury-amenities-at-avery-heights/) as [computer](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Computer) support. Laura often shares her appreciation of the caring professional staff and wonderful services that she has received since her arrival. Daughter of Herman and Evelyn Knott, Laura was born in 1946, in Hartford. In 1973, she married her beloved Richard Twine who passed in 2006. She gets the most endearing smile on her face as she speaks of Richard, their deep love for one another. His legacy will live forever in her heart and in those whose lives he dearly touched. Their children, his boy and girl, Neil and Fiona and her boy and girl Edward and Susan, made up their family. Laura has three grown grandchildren: Nathan, Hana and Lydia. After her children grew up, at 50, she bravely went back to school and earned a Bachelor of Arts in 1996. She then acquired a Master’s degree in 1998 from Norwich University in VT. For 17 Semesters she was an Institutional Sociologist Professor in: Social Sciences, American History, Business and Organizational Management at Union Institute & University in Vermont. Laura’s other interests took her down many interesting paths: Field Executive and Parliamentarian for CT Trails Council of Girls Scouts; Founding Director of the Small Business Administration (SBA) Office of Women’s Business Ownership at the University of Hartford; Executive Director of the Hartford Preservation Alliance; Preservationist and Project Manager in the restoration of an historic 1860 Textile Mill in Vernon, CT. She retired in July of 2017 at 71. Laura remains forever grateful for these blessings and experiences. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [How to Evaluate Quality at Hartford Nursing Homes: Key Criteria to Consider](https://averyheights.org/how-to-evaluate-quality-at-hartford-nursing-homes-key-criteria-to-consider/) **Published:** December 11, 2024 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** Choosing a hartford nursing homes for a loved one is one of the most important decisions a family can make, particularly in [Hartford, CT](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hartford,_Connecticut), where the senior community is growing rapidly. With so many options available, how do you know which facility offers the best care for your loved one? Understanding what to look for can help you ensure their comfort, safety, and dignity. This guide walks you through key considerations, providing a checklist and real-life examples to help you confidently evaluate Hartford nursing homes. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, don’t worry—by the end of this blog, you’ll be well-equipped to start the search. ## Understanding the Unique Needs of Seniors in Hartford, CT Every community has its specific needs when it comes to caring for its elderly population, and Hartford is no different. The city prides itself on its New England charm but also faces unique challenges and resources that influence senior care. ### Specific Needs of Hartford Seniors Hartford seniors often require care tailored to the region’s climate and healthcare landscape. For example: - **Seasonal Needs**: Winter months may demand special attention to prevent slips and maintain indoor comfort. - **New England-Style Living**: Many seniors are accustomed to certain cultural elements, such as quiet, residential neighborhoods or meals featuring classic regional dishes. - **Medical Infrastructure**: Hartford has a robust healthcare network, including access to acute and post-acute care facilities, which nursing homes should leverage. ### Community Care Connection Facilities like Avery Heights in Hartford highlight the importance of a continuum of care, offering services ranging from independent living to long-term care. For families, this creates opportunities to transition loved ones seamlessly as their needs evolve. ## Key Criteria for Evaluating Nursing Home Quality Not all nursing homes are created equal, and focusing on the following criteria can help you choose the right one for your loved one: **What to Look For:** Staffing Levels and Expertise **Why it Matters**: Well-trained staff are critical for providing personalized and effective care. Facilities with low staff-to-resident ratios can lead to overworked caregivers and inadequate attention for residents. **What to Look For**: Are the rooms clean, comfortable, and accessible? **Why it Matters**: A clean and safe environment reduces the risk of infections and accidents, which are common concerns for the elderly. **What to Look For**: Do residents look engaged and well cared for? **Why it Matters**: This directly impacts the health and well-being of your loved one. **What to Look For**: Are staff members friendly and attentive? **Why it Matters**: A good nursing home should care for the mind and soul as much as the body. Emotional well-being is directly linked to physical health. ### Ask Questions Take this opportunity to speak with administrators, caregivers, and residents. Some key questions include: - What is the typical staff-to-resident ratio? - What kind of medical and emotional support do you provide? - How do you handle COVID-19 or other health emergencies? ### Follow Up After your visit, ask yourself if the nursing home aligns with your family’s needs. Request any additional information and confirm whether the home meets state and federal quality standards. ## Take the First Step Toward Quality Home Care Choosing the right nursing home in Hartford may seem daunting, but armed with the right criteria and insights, your family can make an informed and confident decision. Evaluating facilities based on staffing, safety, medical care, and emotional well-being ensures your loved one is not only cared for but thrives. Start your search by scheduling visits to Hartford nursing homes. If you’re still unsure, facilities like Avery Heights offer a continuum of care and welcome tours to help you assess your options. Contact Avery Heights today at [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Pet Therapy and Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/pet-therapy-and-memory-care/) **Published:** January 16, 2025 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Toby-and-Holly-274x300.jpg "Toby and Holly - Avery Heights")Toby and Holly The value of pet therapy in a memory care environment is measured by the significant improvement of a resident’s quality of life. The benefits witnessed in the Burnham Family Memory Care Residence is as follows with improved… \*Opportunities for staff and family members to bond with residents and engage in meaningful interactions through a shared experience \* Emotional and mental well-being. \*Opportunities for physical engagement i.e. walking or throwing of toys \* Comfort and security in the environment The benefits of helping to improve a resident’s quality of life and offering opportunities to reduce stress and anxiety while boosting a person’s mood, is why pet therapy makes a difference to those living with dementia. Toby is a 1 ½ year old, 7lb, Morkie, that joined the Burnham Family Memory Care Residence in April 2024. He belongs to Holly Taylor-Fry, Director of Burnham Residence and visits weekly to share his wagging tail and pleasant disposition with the members of memory care. Individuals of all abilities for the past eight months have engaged and appreciated the companionship of this little dog with a big heart. Smiles and laughter are often shared, as well as positive affirmations, the positive impact is tangible, and the value is priceless. Holly Taylor-Fry BS, TRD, CTRS, CDP, PAC-Trainer Director- Burnham Family Memory Care Residence @ The Heights **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Spotlight on Veteran’s Day at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/spotlight-on-veterans-day-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** November 13, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ### 104-year Old War Hero Colonel Morton Katz to be honored at Avery Heights Veteran’s Day Breakfast November 10 ![Veteran’s Day](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/veteran-salutes-the-american-flag-on-memorial-day-2024-05-07-17-57-17-utc-300x169.jpg "Veteran Salutes The American Flag On Memorial Day In The Cemetery Outdoor - Avery Heights")Avery Heights has a true super-star in their midst, a vastly decorated war hero that is still going. strong at the age of 104! The Heights is pleased and honored to announce that on November 10, 2023 at 9am, decorated war hero Army Infantry Officer Morton Katz will be honored with a Lifetime Achievement Award at their Veteran’s Day Breakfast at The Heights at Avery Heights . Speakers will be there to celebrate Colonel Katz’s illustrious career that dates to World War II. Avery Heights is quite aware of all the amazing people that reside in their cozy and comfortable assisted living quarters. Colonel Katz is one of them. In his early 20’s, Katz found himself in a parachute infantry with the US Army. It was by sheer accident that he got recruited into that career, but eventually this led him to many heroic accomplishments far away from his native Connecticut. His duties took place in far-flung places such as Tunisia, Naples-Foggia, Anzio, Rome-Arno, Southern France, Rhineland, Ardennes-Alsace, and Central Europe. Although by 1942 he was fully trained as a parachutist, Katz was assigned to assault the Anzio beachhead amphibiously which he accomplished successfully, leading men alongside Lt. Col. William P. Yarborough. There, he found a camera at the German headquarters and used this to document the soldiers and sites encountered during WW II. Katz then headed to Italy to clear away enemy positions in the mountains, and during the Battle of the Bulge, Katz’s unit went to stop the German advance. All around him were heavy casualties but just like a character in a dramatic period novel, somehow Katz survived amidst the horrors of war. By 1945, he participated in crossing the Elbe River as the Americans advanced into Germany. One of the highlights of Col. Katz’s military career was liberating Wöbbelin Concentration Camp near Ludwigslust, forcing the Nazi commandant to turn over his gun, a relic that he still has to this very day and would like to contribute to a Holocaust Museum. Later after occupation duty in Berlin, Katz attended UCONN Law School on the GI Bill. Following graduation, Katz remained in service and worked for 17 years at the 411th Civil Affair Company, eventually leading the team as a commanding officer for his last eight years. Katz then worked at the Pentagon with the Defense Intelligence Agency, later retiring with rank as Colonel. He began to pursue his profession in law and made up for lost time as a special assistant public defender. He married the love of his life, Shirley, and together they had two beautiful daughters, Naomi and Rachel. A family man, Morton beams when he discusses his daughters and grandkids. As the patriarch of a family of women, he has learned much about what really matters in life from the lovely ladies that surround him. Colonel Katz is also the author of a recent book “From Parachuter to Public Defender”. This non-stop hard-working hero only recently closed his work office having practiced law even after turning 100. A compelling attorney, Katz has always quietly commanded the courtroom with confidence and elan, the same way he handled the battlefield. All eyes and ears are on him as one can’t help but feel his greatness wherever he goes. How better to describe a life of public service than to listen to the words of (then 99-year old public defender) Morton Katz, as quoted by Erik Ofgang in Connecticut Magazine: ### “A lot of this is attitude. I may be an old buzzard, but I don’t feel like an old buzzard. I get up in the morning and say, “Someone needs me…” Bill Englehart, Director of Avery Heights Assisted Living says: “In a community filled with persons who have led remarkable…sometimes extraordinary… lives Morton stands out as the brightest of lights. We are so pleased to serve Morton at this juncture in his long journey. It has been my privilege to get to know this embodiment of the values of the Greatest Generation, and to honor him on November 10 at our Veteran’s Day Breakfast by presenting him with the Lifetime Service Award.” Thank you, Colonel Katz, for your service to Connecticut and to your country. Our honored Veteran at Avery Heights clearly has received all the treasures that life has to offer and been blessed with exceedingly good health. Undoubtedly, Katz must have received the grace of long life and family happiness because he has been a blessing to so many others from the concentration camp survivors to the countless people who could not afford legal assistance and need to call upon the public defender’s office. Avery Heights honors Colonel Katz’s service and are proud to have him in our midst. ### About Avery Heights Avery Heights is a premier, 43-acre senior living community located in Hartford, Connecticut. As a nonprofit organization owned and operated by Church Homes Inc., Avery Heights is committed to providing the finest in residential living and healthcare [services so that seniors](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) can maintain the highest level of independence. Learn more at [averyheights.org](https://averyheights.org/about-us/) **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Nursing Homes Hartford: Choosing the Best Senior Care Facility](https://averyheights.org/nursing-homes-hartford-choosing-the-best-senior-care-facility/) **Published:** March 9, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [The Importance of Asking for Help for Older Adults](https://averyheights.org/the-importance-of-asking-for-help/) **Published:** January 20, 2025 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** As we age, it’s natural to face challenges that can make daily life more difficult. However, many older adults are hesitant about Asking for Help, often due to fears of losing independence or becoming a burden on others. Despite these concerns, seeking assistance can significantly improve their quality of life and overall well-being. ## Enhanced Safety and Peace of Mind One of the most critical reasons for older adults to ask for help is safety. As we age, the risk of falls and other accidents increases. By accepting help, seniors can mitigate these risks and ensure that they have the support they need in case of emergencies. For example, installing handrails or having a caregiver present can prevent falls and provide peace of mind. ## Improved Health Management Managing health can become more complex as we age, with multiple medications, doctor’s appointments, and dietary restrictions to keep track of. Professional caregivers or family members can help older adults stay on top of their health needs, ensuring they take medications correctly and attend necessary appointments. This support can lead to better health outcomes and a higher quality of life. ## Access to Social Interaction Isolation is a significant issue for many older adults, and it can negatively impact their mental and emotional health. Asking for help often means more opportunities for social interaction, whether through a caregiver, a neighbor, or a family member. These interactions can provide emotional support and reduce feelings of loneliness. ## Maintaining Independence Contrary to popular belief, asking for help can actually help older adults maintain their independence. By accepting assistance with challenging tasks, they can continue living in their homes and enjoy their favorite activities. This support allows them to focus on what they love rather than struggling with tasks they find difficult. ## Building Stronger Relationships Asking for help can also strengthen relationships with family and friends. It provides opportunities for loved ones to connect and spend time together, creating a sense of togetherness and mutual support. This can be especially important for older adults who may feel isolated or disconnected from their social circles. ## Overcoming the Stigma of Asking for Help There is often a social stigma associated with asking for help, but overcoming this barrier is essential. By reframing the idea of asking for help as a way to embrace interdependence, older adults can see it as a positive step towards maintaining their well-being and independence. In conclusion, asking for help is not a sign of weakness but a proactive step towards ensuring safety, health, and happiness in older age. It’s about finding a balance between independence and accepting support, which ultimately leads to a better quality of life. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Senior Living in Connecticut: From Independent Living to Specialized Care](https://averyheights.org/senior-living-in-connecticut-from-independent-living-to-specialized-care/) **Published:** January 28, 2025 **Author:** Avery Heights **Content:** ![Senior Living in Connecticut](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/jaddy-liu-nk-xUZwSjR4-unsplash-300x199.jpg "jaddy-liu-nk-xUZwSjR4-unsplash - Avery Heights")Selecting the right Senior Living in Connecticut options is one of the most significant decisions seniors and their families face. Connecticut offers a wide range of living solutions tailored to seniors’ needs, ensuring comfort, [community](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-your-guide-to-senior-care-community/), and care while promoting independence. Whether you’re planning ahead for yourself or searching on behalf of a loved one, understanding the options available is crucial for peace of mind and informed decision-making. This guide explores senior living options in Connecticut to help you find the perfect fit, from vibrant independent living to specialized care facilities. ## Understanding Senior Living Options in Connecticut Senior living communities cater to varying levels of care and independence. Regardless of lifestyle or medical needs, Connecticut provides a spectrum of options to accommodate seniors at every stage of life. Broadly, these options include: 1. **Independent Living** for seniors who want to maintain their lifestyle but with access to additional conveniences and socialization. 2. **Assisted Living** for individuals requiring some help with daily activities like meals, medication, or personal care. 3. **Memory Care** is designed for those with Alzheimer’s or other cognitive impairments, providing a safe and supportive environment. 4. **Skilled Nursing** for seniors who need medical attention or long-term nursing care. By exploring these categories in detail, you’ll gain a clearer understanding of which solution suits your needs. ## Independent Senior Living In Connecticut ### What They Offer Independent living is ideal for active seniors seeking a social and dynamic environment without the responsibilities of home maintenance. Communities like **Avery Heights in Hartford** provide well-appointed apartments or cottages designed for comfortable, independent living. What sets these spaces apart are convenience and access to amenities like: - State-of-the-art wellness programs. - Community activities like fitness classes and events. - Maintenance-free living (no more shoveling snow or lawn care!). - On-site dining options. ### Why Choose Independent Living? For many seniors, independent living allows them to remain self-sufficient while enjoying an engaging lifestyle. The vibrant atmosphere fosters connections with others at a similar stage of life, offering a sense of community and belonging crucial to wellness. Independent living communities also provide peace of mind, knowing that help is nearby if it’s needed in the future. **Key Connecticut Communities to Explore**: - Avery Heights (Hartford): Known for its zest-filled environment and activities. - Essex Village (Essex): Renowned for its beautiful colonial surroundings. - The Watermark (Southbury): A luxury choice combining scenic views and superior amenities. ## Senior Living In Connecticut ## What They Offer [Assisted living](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assisted_living) in Connecticut bridges the gap between independent living and full-time care. It’s designed for seniors who require assistance with daily activities such as bathing, meal preparation, or taking medications. Assisted living apartments maintain individual privacy but are only a call button away from trained staff. At **Avery Heights**, assisted living services offer the perfect blend of care and individuality, ensuring residents feel supported but not dependent. Comfort and autonomy remain central. ### Amenities and Services - 24-hour on-call assistance. - On-site healthcare and wellness programs. - Housekeeping and dining services. - Programming for physical and mental engagement. Assisted living can ease the strains families face when caregiving becomes demanding while ensuring loved ones enjoy a supportive and safe environment. **Top Communities Offering Assisted Living in Connecticut**: - Avery Heights (Hartford): Known for tailor-made care with dignified independence. - Masonicare (Wallingford): Comprehensive care in a serene environment. - StoneRidge (Mystic): A resort-like experience catering to assisted needs. ## Memory Care and Specialized Care for Unique Needs ### What is Memory Care? Memory care is a specialized form of assisted living designed for those with Alzheimer’s, dementia, or other cognitive impairments. These facilities have specially trained staff who provide structured routines and a calm, enriching environment to ensure safety and comfort. At **Avery Heights**, the memory care program is centered on compassion and respect. It offers engaging activities to enhance quality of life while focusing on safety and dignity. ### Specialized Services in senior living in connecticut - Secured environments to prevent wandering. - 24-hour supervision with skilled professionals. - Tailored activities that stimulate memory and maintain cognitive functions. Memory care facilities provide much-needed peace of mind for caregivers, knowing their loved one is in expert hands. If you’re seeking memory care in Connecticut, **Avery Heights,** and **Cedar Mountain Commons** in Newington are frequently praised for their services. ## Choosing the Right Fit for You or Your Loved One When selecting a senior living community in Connecticut, it’s important to evaluate several factors to make an informed choice: - **Location**: Is the facility close to family and friends? - **Cost**: Does the pricing align with your budget, and are there additional fees? - **Services**: Does the community provide the care level you or your loved one needs? - **Community Atmosphere**: Are the residents engaged and happy? Visit the community or take a virtual tour to get a feel for its environment. - **Future Needs**: Does the community offer a continuum of care in case additional support is needed later? Also, don’t hesitate to ask for feedback from current residents or their caregivers. Hearing firsthand experiences can be invaluable. ### Explore Connecticut’s Senior Living Options Facilities like **Avery Heights** make the process seamless, with options ranging from independent living to comprehensive memory care. Their dedication to personalized care allows you or your loved one to age with grace, dignity, and the appropriate level of support. ## Final Thoughts: The Importance of Personalized Care Navigating senior living options doesn’t have to be overwhelming when you approach it with clarity and preparation. From independent living to specialized memory care, Connecticut’s wide array of senior living communities means you’ll find the perfect fit for yourself or your loved one. Remember, informed decisions empower better experiences. Start by exploring facilities like **Avery Heights**, known for their dedication to creating a safe, engaging, and fulfilling environment. If you’re ready, schedule a visit to see firsthand how senior living in Connecticut can transform this chapter of life into one filled with comfort and connection. > **Looking for expert care? Contact senior living experts at Avery Heights today to explore their options and schedule a tour.** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Avery Heights Veterans Wall of Honor - Robert Pettegrew ](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-veterans-wall-of-honor-robert-pettegrew/) **Published:** March 9, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Bob-and-Hope-Pettigrew-Avery-Heights-2025-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-3-1-240x300.webp "Bob and Hope Pettigrew Avery Heights 2025 AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-3 1 - Avery Heights")Robert Pettegrew This month on the Wall of Honor, we are honored to shine a light on Bob Pettegrew, a [distinguished veteran](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/supporting-veterans/ "Supporting Veterans") whose service and dedication have left a lasting impact. Born in 1936 in Columbus, Ohio, Bob’s early life was characterized by frequent relocations due to his father’s excellent job opportunities. Bob and his wife Hope ultimately settled down and spent 53 years in Peterborough, New Hampshire. Drawn by the excitement and opportunities it presented, Bob’s journey into military service began when he joined the Air Force. He was selected for the Air Force Security Service, where he underwent rigorous training that included a top-secret security clearance. Bob’s exceptional aptitude for languages led him to the prestigious Institute of Far Eastern Languages at [Yale University](https://www.yale.edu), where he became a skilled Chinese Linguist. Following his training, Bob was assigned to the National Security Agency (NSA), one of the most secretive facilities in the United States, located just north of Washington, D.C. There, he honed his skills for three months before being stationed in Okinawa, Japan in 1958. During his time in Okinawa, Bob monitored Chinese military communications, utilizing his language expertise to record critical information. His work was vital to national security during a pivotal time in history. Bob was part of the US Air Force for a total of three years. While serving overseas, Bob maintained a strong connection with his future wife, Hope, through letters. Together, they have built a beautiful family, including two daughters, Caroline and Annie, and five grandsons. Caroline lives in West Hartford and Annie in Westminster, Maryland. Bob and Hope have five grandchildren (all now young men). Bob’s professional journey continued after his military service. Part of his success was forming his own consulting company Robert Pettegrew and Associates. For over 20 years, he was a fundraising consultant to various non-profit organizations and large corporation. Throughout his career, Bob’s love for New England remained strong, and he eventually found his way back to the region he cherished. Bob and Hope Pettegrew just celebrated 64 years of marriage, a testament to their enduring love and partnership. They now reside at Avery Heights, close to their daughter Caroline. Bob’s life story is one of service, dedication, and love. We salute him for his contributions to our nation and to his family. Thank you, Bob, for your service and for being an inspiring member of our community. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Senior Living in CT: Your Roadmap to a Comfortable, Worry-Free Retirement](https://averyheights.org/senior-living-in-ct-your-roadmap-to-a-comfortable-worry-free-retirement/) **Published:** March 9, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/image.jpeg "image - Avery Heights") When it comes to choosing senior living options, the abundance of choices can easily feel overwhelming. From independent living to memory care, navigating the options requires thoughtful consideration, especially for seniors and their families who want to ensure comfort and security. If you’re researching **senior living in CT**, this guide will help you explore the choices, compare features, and find the best fit for an enriching and worry-free retirement. ## Understanding Senior Living Options Before selecting a senior living community, it’s important to understand the different types of care available. Every individual or family is unique, and each option offers varying levels of support, independence, and care to suit specific needs. ### Independent Living Independent living is perfect for active seniors who wish to retain their freedom while enjoying perks like maintenance-free living and access to community amenities. These neighborhoods often include private apartments or homes alongside shared spaces for socializing. **Ideal for:** Seniors who are healthy, active, and looking to downsize but don’t need daily assistance. ### Assisted Living Assisted living combines independent living with personalized support for daily tasks such as cooking, dressing, or medication management. Residents maintain a level of independence while having access to professional care when needed. **Ideal for:** Seniors requiring occasional assistance while still valuing independence. ### Memory Care Memory care units specialize in supporting individuals with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia. These communities are equipped with trained staff, secure environments, and tailored programs designed to enhance the quality of life for those living with cognitive impairments. **Ideal for:** Seniors diagnosed with memory-related conditions. ### Skilled Nursing Facilities Skilled nursing facilities, or nursing homes, provide round-the-clock care for individuals who have significant medical needs. This option includes access to professional nursing staff, rehabilitation services, and long-term care for various health conditions. **Ideal for:** Seniors who require ongoing medical or rehabilitative care. ## Key Factors to Consider Researching features and services is essential when selecting the right senior living option. Here are some of the most important considerations as you evaluate different communities in Connecticut. ### Location and Accessibility Having a community that’s close to family members, friends, or medical facilities can play a significant role in decision-making. Look for an area that offers accessibility to transportation, nearby shopping centers, and health clinics while maintaining a peaceful and safe environment. ### Cost and Payment Options Senior living costs can vary widely depending on the level of care provided. Many Connecticut communities offer various pricing models, such as month-to-month leasing or tiered care plans. Assess your budget and explore available financial assistance options to find a community that fits your needs. ### Amenities and Services Facilities with robust amenities can dramatically improve the quality of everyday life. Some features to look for include fitness facilities, cultural programs, group outings, dining services, and on-site medical appointments. ### Healthcare Facilities Access to excellent healthcare is non-negotiable. Make sure the community has partnerships with hospitals or healthcare providers, including on-site medical staff and emergency response systems. ## Top Communities for Senior Living in CT To make your search easier, we’ve spotlighted several reputable senior living communities in Connecticut. These communities balance comfort, excellence in care, and engaging amenities. ### 1. Avery Heights (Hartford, CT) Nestled in the heart of [Hartford](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hartford%2C_Connecticut), Avery Heights offers a continuum of care, from [independent](https://averyheights.org/independent-living-hartford-ct/) and [assisted](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) living to skilled nursing and rehabilitation. The stunning 45-acre campus includes walking trails, dining venues, and recreational activities for a vibrant community experience. ### 2. McLean (Simsbury, CT) McLean offers a tiered community approach with options ranging from independent living to long-term care. Known for its lush surroundings and quality health services, McLean provides a small-town atmosphere and plenty of on-site wellness programs. ### 3. The Residence at Brookside (Avon, CT) This community excels in assisted living and memory care, offering personalized plans and engaging programs for both residents and their families. The Residence at Brookside emphasizes comfort through luxury amenities and gourmet dining. ### 4. Essex Meadows (Essex, CT) Essex Meadows is a life care retirement community that blends independent lifestyles with access to higher levels of care when needed. The campus boasts resort-like amenities, including an indoor pool, fine dining, and cultural activities, encapsulating refined senior living. ### 5. The Greens at Cannondale (Wilton, CT) With a focus on innovative memory care and personalized assisted living, The Greens at Cannondale prioritizes enriching experiences and social connectivity. The warm and supportive environment fosters a unique home-like feel. ## Financial Planning Affording senior living can be one of the most significant concerns for families. However, financial strategies and resources are available to make the transition more manageable. ### Navigating Medicare and Medicaid While these programs don’t generally cover independent or assisted living, they can help cover costs for skilled nursing facilities or in-home medical care. Check Connecticut’s Medicaid waivers to determine if you qualify for state-funded aid. ### Long-Term Care Insurance Investing in long-term care insurance is a proactive way to cover future senior living costs. Speak to a financial advisor to determine which policy best suits your specific situation. ## Legal Considerations Senior living also comes with specific legal and administrative tasks that can ease the transition into retirement. ### Estate Planning Ensure wills, trusts, and other legal documents are clear and updated. This helps secure your assets and guarantees that your wishes are properly managed, especially in containing care-related expenses. ### Power of Attorney Assigning a power of attorney to handle medical or financial decisions is a critical step. This ensures someone you trust can act on your behalf if necessary. ## Resources and Support Several Connecticut-based organizations and resources are available to seniors and their families to provide guidance and support. ### Government Agencies - **Connecticut Department of Aging and Disability Services** Resources include benefits counseling, housing assistance, and caregiver support. ### Non-Profit Organizations - **AARP Connecticut** Offers workshops, advocacy, and resources for senior living. ### Support Groups Connect with caregiver support groups or senior activities in your area for emotional and practical guidance during this transition. ## Take the First Step Toward a Comfortable Future Making informed decisions about **senior living in CT** can shape the next chapter of your life into a fulfilling one. Take time to explore your options, evaluate your priorities, and plan your finances. And don’t forget—communities like Avery Heights offer a holistic approach to senior living, combining quality care, comfortable amenities, and a supportive environment. A worry-free, comfortable retirement is within reach. [Contact us today](https://averyheights.org/contact-retirement-community-hartford-ct/) to learn more about how you can achieve it! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Senior Living in CT at Avery Heights: The Perfect Place to Retire](https://averyheights.org/senior-living-in-ct-at-avery-heights-the-perfect-place-to-retire/) **Published:** March 9, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/image-1.jpeg "image - Avery Heights") Senior Living in CT Choosing a [senior living community](https://averyheights.org/moving-forward/) is a significant step, and finding the right fit can transform your golden years into your best years. At Avery Heights in Hartford, Connecticut, we combine expert care, vibrant living options, and a welcoming community to help you live a comfortable and fulfilling life. Whether you’re looking for independent living, assisted living, or specialized care, Avery Heights is designed to meet your unique needs. Discover how Avery Heights makes senior living more enjoyable, stress-free, and tailored just for you. ## Why Avery Heights Stands Out When it comes to senior living in Connecticut, Avery Heights is more than just a place to stay—it’s a place to thrive. Here’s what makes us special: - **Customized Care Plans**: From assisted living to skilled nursing care, our expert staff ensures that every resident receives personalized support while maintaining their independence. - **Beautiful Campus**: Nestled on a lush, scenic campus, our community offers picturesque settings with walking paths and green spaces for relaxation. - **Exceptional Amenities**: Enjoy restaurant-style dining, fitness programs, social activities, and more—all curated to enhance your quality of life. - **Strong Community Feel**: Residents regularly participate in organized events, day trips, and clubs, creating a warm, welcoming atmosphere. - **24/7 Professional Assistance**: Our compassionate staff is available 24/7, providing peace of mind for both residents and their loved ones. ## What Type of Senior Living is Right for You? Every individual has their own needs and preferences, and Avery Heights offers a range of living arrangements to match: - **Independent Living**: This option is perfect for active seniors who want the freedom of private residences with access to amenities like dining, fitness centers, and social events. - **Assisted Living**: Receive support with daily activities, from medication management to dressing, while still enjoying independence. - **Memory Care**: Specialized care for those with Alzheimer’s or dementia, offering structured environments and dedicated support. - **Skilled Nursing and Rehab**: We provide professional and compassionate care in a comfortable setting for residents requiring 24/7 medical attention or post-surgery rehabilitation. Our team guides you through your options and ensures you’re confident in your choice. ## Amenities That Enrich Your Life At Avery Heights, we believe [senior living](https://averyheights.org/moving-forward/) should be a time for growth, relaxation, and enjoyment. That’s why we go the extra mile to offer premium amenities, including: - **Restaurant-Style Dining** with chef-prepared, nutritious meals. - **Health & Wellness Programs**, such as fitness classes and physical therapy. - **Beautiful Outdoor Spaces** featuring walking paths, gardens, and seating areas. - **Social Activities & Events** that bring the community together for fun and connection. - **Pet-Friendly Policies** to ensure your furry friends are part of your new home. Every detail at Avery Heights is designed to enrich your daily life and create a sense of belonging. ## Planning for Senior Living Transitioning into senior living is easier with proactive planning. To make the process seamless, consider these tips: - **Evaluate Costs**: Ask about monthly fees, and ensure you understand what’s included (such as meals, healthcare services, etc.). - **Look Into Funding Options**: Explore resources like long-term care insurance or veterans’ benefits to help cover costs. - **Downsize Thoughtfully**: Transitioning into a smaller space is simpler if you plan ahead and bring sentimental items that make your new home feel cozy. Financial planning can feel daunting, but our team is happy to help you understand your options and guide you every step of the way. ## Tips for a Smooth Transition Moving to a senior living community doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Here are some simple steps to help: - **Visit Often**: Tour facilities multiple times to familiarize yourself with the environment. - **Bring Personal Touches**: Decorate your new residence with familiar items to make it feel like home. - **Engage in Activities**: Join social events early on to meet new friends and neighbors. - **Establish a Routine**: Blend cherished hobbies with new opportunities for a balanced and fulfilling lifestyle. Our dedicated team at Avery Heights works closely with residents and their families to make the transition as smooth and stress-free as possible. ## Experience Senior Living at Its Best Avery Heights isn’t just a place to live—it’s a vibrant, supportive community where you can truly thrive. From personalized care and enriching amenities to a beautiful, serene campus, everything we do is designed to ensure our residents live their best lives. If you’re ready to explore senior living in [Hartford, CT](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hartford,_Connecticut), Avery Heights welcomes you to schedule a tour, meet our friendly team, and experience the community firsthand. **Click here to schedule your tour or learn more today!** **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Avery Heights Veterans Wall of Honor - Melvin Christensen](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-veterans-wall-of-honor-melvin-christensen/) **Published:** April 24, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/Melvin-Christensen-2-9335-240x300.webp "Melvin Christensen 2-9335 - Avery Heights")Melvin Christensen ## Melvin Christensen: A Life of Service and Dedication On the Wall of Honor today we highlight Melvin Christensen. Born in [Wethersfield, Connecticut](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wethersfield%2C_Connecticut), Melvin Christensen’s life has been characterized by a passion for mechanics, public service, and family. As a young man, Melvin discovered his love for automobiles early on, attending trade school in Hartford where he studied auto mechanics. Melvin and his father owned and operated an Atlantic station between High School and being hired by the state. Because it was in the small town of Cromwell where they were living, he became well known and friends with many townspeople At 18, Melvin joined the Air National Guard, serving at Bradley Field. His motivation came from his sister’s boyfriend, who spoke positively about military service. During the Korean War era, Melvin served one weekend a month, initially working in the motor pool and advancing to the rank of sergeant. His professional journey took an unexpected turn when a neighbor introduced him to drafting classes. What began as a casual interest soon became a career-defining opportunity. After taking a drafting test encouraged by his father, Melvin was hired by the state’s Department of Transportation. He worked diligently, eventually becoming head of the drafting department, managing a team of 12 professionals and overseeing projects related to traffic signals, pavement markings, and speed limits. Throughout his 27-year state career, Melvin balanced his professional responsibilities with his personal commitments. An artistic side complemented his technical skills during his Air National Guard service. His creativity and attention to detail contributed to his success in drafting and management. He also joined the volunteer fire dept where he was a member until he was injured carrying a stretcher with a patient on it down a flight of stairs. Melvin’s personal life was deeply enriched by his marriage to his wife, Ethel May, whom he met when he was 16. They married after a five-year courtship, and she initially trained as a nurse before becoming a home aid and later caring for her father-in-law. Sadly, she passed away in 2021, leaving behind a legacy of care and love. Together, they raised three children: Robert (Bobby), who lives in Pennsylvania, Sandra, who also lives in Pennsylvania, and Kim, who resides in Connecticut and has been particularly supportive of Melvin in recent years. In November, Melvin moved to Avery Heights after selling his home. Despite the transition, he remains positive, enjoying the social environment and support of his children. Now retired, Melvin reflects on a life marked by service, adaptability, and dedication to his family and profession. With a rich history of military service, a successful career in state government, and a loving family, Melvin Christensen exemplifies a life of purpose and commitment. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Assisted Living in CT: Free Comprehensive Guide to Affordable Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-comfortable-senior-living/) **Published:** March 17, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Assisted Living in CT: Finding the right balance between independence and support is crucial as we age. Assisted living offers a perfect solution for many seniors and their families in Connecticut (CT). With a variety of facilities, top-notch amenities, and specialized care options, assisted living provides a comfortable and enriching environment for seniors to thrive. This guide explores everything you need to know about assisted living facilities in CT—from understanding what assisted living entails to tips on choosing the right facility for your needs. Whether you’re a senior planning your next chapter, a family caregiver, or a healthcare professional seeking information, this resource will guide you every step of the way. --- ## Understanding Assisted Living in CT ### What is Assisted Living? Assisted living bridges the gap between independent living and full-time nursing care. It’s designed for seniors who value their independence but may need help with daily activities such as medication management, bathing, or meal preparation. These facilities offer a community-oriented living experience alongside access to professional care and support. ### Benefits of Assisted Living Here are some of the key benefits of assisted living facilities in CT: - **Personalized Assistance**: Care is tailored to each resident’s unique needs, ensuring they receive the right amount of support without compromising independence. - **Social Engagement**: Most facilities feature a vibrant community setting with group activities, events, and shared dining experiences. - **Safety and Security**: Staff are available around the clock, and many facilities include safety features like emergency response systems and accessible living areas. - **On-Site Services**: From housekeeping to transportation, assisted living facilities handle day-to-day chores, allowing seniors to focus on what they enjoy. --- ## Types of Assisted Living Facilities in Connecticut Connecticut offers a wide range of assisted living options to meet diverse needs. Common types of facilities include: 1. **Independent Living with Assisted Services** These communities are perfect for active seniors. They offer private apartments with optional add-on services like meal plans or personal care assistance. 2. **Traditional Assisted Living** Includes around-the-clock care, shared or private rooms, and extensive social programs tailored to residents with moderate care needs. 3. **Memory Care Units** Specialized facilities or wings within assisted living communities are designed for seniors with Alzheimer’s or other forms of dementia. 4. **Luxury Assisted Living** High-end facilities with premium amenities, such as gourmet dining, fitness centers, and spa services. Each type caters to specific needs, so understanding what best fits your loved one’s requirements is crucial when making your decision. --- ## Key Features and Amenities to Look For When researching assisted living facilities in CT, pay close attention to features that ensure comfort, quality care, and an engaging lifestyle. Common amenities include: - **Apartment Options**: Studios, one-bedroom, or shared accommodations. Visit facilities to see how well layouts meet accessibility standards. - **Activity Programs**: From fitness classes to art workshops, engaging activities improve residents’ mental and physical well-being. - **Healthcare Services**: On-site nurses, physicians, or partnerships with nearby healthcare providers. - **Culinary Offerings**: Many facilities pride themselves on offering chef-prepared meals that cater to different dietary needs. - **Transportation**: Shuttle services for shopping, appointments, and recreational outings. - **Pet-Friendly Policies**: Some facilities welcome pets to allow seniors to bring their companions. Pro Tip: Visit multiple facilities to experience the atmosphere. This first-hand insight matters just as much as what’s listed on a website. --- ## Costs and Financial Planning for Assisted Living ### How Much Does Assisted Living Cost in Connecticut? The cost of assisted living in CT typically ranges between $4,000 and $7,000 per month, depending on the location, level of care, and amenities. Memory care tends to be on the higher end of this range due to specialized services. ### Financial Options to Consider Making assisted living affordable may require careful planning. Here are some options to explore: - **Private Payments**: Savings, pensions, or other personal funds. - **Long-Term Care Insurance**: Many policies cover assisted living expenses. - **Medicaid Waivers**: Connecticut’s Home Care Program for Elders (CHCPE) may help cover costs for qualifying seniors. - **Veterans’ Benefits**: Veterans Affairs (VA) programs can provide financial assistance to eligible veterans and their spouses. Take time to review your financial situation and consult with a financial planner if necessary. --- ## How to Choose the Right Facility Making such an important decision can feel overwhelming. Here’s a step-by-step guide to simplify the process. ### Step 1: Assess Your Needs Document the level of care required, including physical, medical, and emotional support. ### Step 2: Research Facilities Search for “assisted living CT” and create a list of potential options. Consider proximity to family and lifestyle preferences. ### Step 3: Visit and Tour Communities Schedule tours to learn more about the environment, staff, and amenities. Ask about room availability and be sure to look for cleanliness, safety features, and friendly staff interactions. ### Step 4: Compare Costs Request a detailed breakdown of costs, including any extra fees. Some facilities may charge separately for amenities like laundry or meal plans. ### Step 5: Read Reviews and Ask Questions If possible, speak to current residents and their families. Online reviews also offer a glimpse into others’ experiences. ### Step 6: Make Your Decision After evaluating all aspects, choose the facility that best aligns with your loved one’s needs and preferences. --- ## Resources for Seniors and Caregivers in Connecticut Here are a few organizations and programs available to Connecticut residents to aid in their assisted living search and care needs. - **Connecticut Assisted Living Association (CALA)** Provides information about licensed communities and regulatory guidelines. - **Agency on Aging of South-Central Connecticut** Offers resources for senior services, financial aid, and caregiving programs. - **2-1-1 Connecticut** A free, statewide information and referral service connecting residents to local resources, including senior housing and healthcare. These programs are excellent starting points for navigating the often complicated elder care landscape. --- ## Finding Comfort in Assisted Living Assisted living in CT offers seniors a chance to live comfortably, safely, and independently in a community tailored to their unique needs. By understanding the options available, assessing financial considerations, and choosing the right facility, families can feel confident their loved ones are well cared for. If you’re starting the search for a loved one’s next home, remember that this is a partnership. Connect with facilities, ask tough questions, and rely on community resources to make the best choice. Looking for more specific advice? Don’t hesitate to reach out to the professionals at Avery Heights. We’re here to help guide you through the process. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [How to Know When Your Parents Need Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/how-to-know-when-your-parents-need-assisted-living/) **Published:** April 30, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/Our-Community-Banner-1-1024x308.jpg "Our-Community-Banner - Avery Heights")As we age, there may come a time when we need extra help to carry out daily activities such as bathing, dressing, and taking medication. In such cases, moving to a senior living facility can be the best solution. However, leaving the comfort of one’s home and moving to a new environment can be overwhelming. It is essential to have open and honest communication with your spouse when discussing the possibility of moving to assisted living. This article will discuss how to talk to your spouse about moving to senior living. **The Importance of Assisted Living** These facilities provide seniors with the necessary support and care to lead a comfortable life. They offer various services, including meals, housekeeping, transportation, and medical assistance. Assisted living is an excellent option for seniors who can no longer [live independently](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) but do not require the level of care provided in a nursing home. **Start the Conversation Early** It is essential to start the conversation about moving to senior living early. Waiting until your spouse’s condition deteriorates will make the transition more challenging. Start by expressing your concerns and discussing the benefits of moving to a facility. Be patient and listen to your spouse’s concerns and fears. **Understand Your Spouse’s Perspective** Your spouse may be resistant to the idea of moving to a senior living facility. They may feel that they are giving up their independence or fear that they will lose their sense of identity. It is essential to understand your spouse’s perspective and address their concerns. Let them know that moving to a facility does not mean giving up their independence. Instead, it gives them the support they need to maintain their independence. **Discuss the Benefits of Senior Living** Senior living facilities provide seniors with a range of benefits. They offer a supportive environment, [social activities,](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) and access to medical care. Discuss these benefits with your spouse and how they can improve their quality of life. Let them know they will have access to 24-hour [care and support](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/), which can give them peace of mind. **Tour Assisted Living Facilities** Tour a few facilities together to help your spouse understand senior living. Seeing the facilities first-hand can help alleviate their fears and give them a better idea of what to expect. Choosing a facility that meets your spouse’s needs and preferences is essential. **Involve Your Spouse in the Decision-Making Process** Moving to senior living is a significant life change, and involving your spouse in decision-making is essential. Let them have a say in [choosing the facility](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-best-assisted-living-facility/) and discuss their preferences. Involving your spouse in decision-making will make them feel more in control and comfortable with the move. **Conclusion** Moving to assisted living can be difficult for seniors and their spouses. It is essential to have open and honest communication when discussing the possibility of moving to an assisted living facility. Starting the conversation early, understanding your spouse’s perspective, discussing the benefits, touring facilities, and involving your spouse in decision-making can make the transition smoother. Remember, moving to a facility does not mean giving up independence. Instead, it provides the necessary support and [care to maintain independence](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and improve quality of life. Avery Heights offers [assisted living in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) that provides compassionate care and a vibrant community for seniors. Our staff is dedicated to helping residents live fully in a safe and comfortable environment. Contact us today to learn more about our services and schedule a tour. We are here to support you and your spouse through this critical life transition. **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [Tips on How to Talk to Your Spouse about Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/how-to-talk-to-your-spouse-about-assisted-living-in-hartford/) **Published:** April 14, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![assisted living in hartford, Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/AH-header-11-1024x308.jpg "AH-header-11 - Avery Heights")As we age, there may come a time when we need extra help to carry out daily activities such as bathing, dressing, and taking medication. In such cases, moving to a assisted living in Hartford can be the best solution. However, leaving the comfort of one’s home and moving to a new environment can be overwhelming. It is essential to have open and honest communication with your spouse when discussing the possibility of moving to assisted living. This article will discuss how to talk to your spouse about moving to senior living. **The Importance of Assisted Living** These facilities provide seniors with the necessary support and care to lead a comfortable life. They offer various services, including meals, housekeeping, transportation, and medical assistance. Assisted living is an excellent option for seniors who can no longer [live independently](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) but do not require the level of care provided in a nursing home. **Start the Conversation Early** It is essential to start the conversation about moving to senior living early. Waiting until your spouse’s condition deteriorates will make the transition more challenging. Start by expressing your concerns and discussing the benefits of moving to a facility. Be patient and listen to your spouse’s concerns and fears. **Understand Your Spouse’s Perspective** Your spouse may be resistant to the idea of moving to a senior living facility. They may feel that they are giving up their independence or fear that they will lose their sense of identity. It is essential to understand your spouse’s perspective and address their concerns. Let them know that moving to a facility does not mean giving up their independence. Instead, it gives them the support they need to maintain their independence. **Discuss the Benefits of Senior Living** Senior living facilities provide seniors with a range of benefits. They offer a supportive environment, [social activities,](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) and access to medical care. Discuss these benefits with your spouse and how they can improve their quality of life. Let them know they will have access to 24-hour [care and support](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/), which can give them peace of mind. **Tour Assisted Living Facilities** Tour a few facilities together to help your spouse understand senior living. Seeing the facilities first-hand can help alleviate their fears and give them a better idea of what to expect. Choosing a facility that meets your spouse’s needs and preferences is essential. **Involve Your Spouse in the Decision-Making Process** Moving to senior living is a significant life change, and involving your spouse in decision-making is essential. Let them have a say in [choosing the facility](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-best-assisted-living-facility/) and discuss their preferences. Involving your spouse in decision-making will make them feel more in control and comfortable with the move. **Conclusion** Moving to assisted living can be difficult for seniors and their spouses. It is essential to have open and honest communication when discussing the possibility of moving to an assisted living facility. Starting the conversation early, understanding your spouse’s perspective, discussing the benefits, touring facilities, and involving your spouse in decision-making can make the transition smoother. Remember, moving to a facility does not mean giving up independence. Instead, it provides the necessary support and [care to maintain independence](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and improve quality of life. Avery Heights offers [assisted living in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) that provides compassionate care and a vibrant community for seniors. Our staff is dedicated to helping residents live fully in a safe and comfortable environment. Contact us today to learn more about our services and schedule a tour. We are here to support you and your spouse through this critical life transition. **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [10 Ways Assisted Living Can Improve Your Quality of Life](https://averyheights.org/10-ways-assisted-living-can-improve-your-quality-of-life/) **Published:** February 17, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** [![Assisted Living and Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/DSC_7870.jpg "- Avery Heights")](http://https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) Assisted living is an excellent alternative for seniors who want to maintain independence while receiving help with daily tasks like meal preparation, housekeeping, and personal care. It is a residential setting that offers various services tailored to meet the needs of seniors who cannot live independently. Assisted living has many benefits that make it an excellent choice for seniors seeking to enhance their quality of life. Here are ten advantages of assisted living in improving your quality of life: **Safety and Security** Assisted living communities provide a safe environment where you can live with the [comfort of knowing that your safety is taken care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) of. This can help to scale down the risk of falls and other accidents. Additionally, many communities have 24-hour security and monitoring systems, providing an extra layer of protection. **Socialisation Opportunities** Assisted living communities provide seniors with a social atmosphere where they can engage with peers and attend activities that help keep them mentally active. This can reduce feelings of loneliness and boredom. **Enhanced Quality of Life** Assisted living communities offer a variety of services and activities designed to reinforce the quality of life for seniors. From housekeeping and laundry services to social activities and outings, assisted living facilities strive to make life more enjoyable for their residents. **Access to Medical Care** Assisted living communities provide access to on-site medical care, making it easier for [seniors to receive the care](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-the-quality-of-life-for-seniors-with-memory-care-at-avery-heights/) they need. This can help [seniors stay healthier and independent](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) longer. **Stress-Free Living** Assisted living facilities are designed to diminish stress and make life easier for seniors. With meals prepared and housekeeping taken care of, [seniors can enjoy a stress-free lifestyle](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/). **Personal Care** Assisted living communities to provide [personal care services,](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) including bathing, dressing, and meal preparation. This can ensure that you can live independently while still getting the help you need with tasks that can be difficult or time-consuming. **Transportation** Assisted living communities provide transportation services to help you get to and from medical appointments, shopping, and other activities. This can reduce the stress of finding transportation and make it easier to get around. **Flexibility** Assisted living facilities offer flexible living arrangements tailored to meet each individual’s needs. This allows [seniors to choose the services](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and amenities best suit their lifestyles. **Affordable Living** Assisted living communities are generally more affordable than other types of senior living. This can help to make senior living more accessible and make it easier for you to afford the care you need. **Peace of Mind** Assisted living provides peace for family members who may worry about their aging loved ones. Seniors can enjoy a safe and [comfortable lifestyle with 24/7 on-site staff and various services](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and amenities. **Conclusion** Assisted living can be an excellent way to improve your life. It provides a safe and secure environment and access to [medical care and support](https://averyheights.org/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-medications-for-parkinsons-what-you-need-to-know/) services. Additionally, it can provide social opportunities and help to make life more affordable. Assisted living can be an excellent opportunity for those looking for an alternative to traditional senior living. Avery Heights is an excellent choice for seniors looking for convenience, value, and quality care. We offer a rental-only option that eliminates the need for entrance fees or complicated contracts while providing access to a wide range of assisted living services in New Britain. With our strong reputation for delivering seamless care and extraordinary value, Avery Heights makes it easy for [seniors to live the life](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-the-quality-of-life-for-seniors-with-memory-care-at-avery-heights/) they want without worrying about the future. Contact us if you have any concerns about assisted living in New Britain. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Choosing the Best Assisted Living Facility for a Loved One](https://averyheights.org/choosing-the-best-assisted-living-facility/) **Published:** May 7, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Choosing an assisted living facility for a loved one can be an overwhelming and difficult task. It’s essential to take the time to research the available facilities and make sure that the one you select is the best fit for your loved one. **Consider Your Loved One’s Specific Needs** When considering an assisted living facility for a loved one, it is important to consider their specific needs. Different facilities provide different levels of care, so it is important to take into account the individual’s medical and personal needs. For example, if the loved one has a chronic illness or mobility issues, then the facility should be able to provide assistance with basic activities of daily living such as dressing, bathing, and toileting. Additionally, it is important to consider the emotional and social needs of the individual, as living in an assisted living facility can be an isolating and lonely experience. Therefore, the facility should provide support, [engaging activities,](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) and opportunities to socialize and make friends. Finally, it is important to consider the cost of the facility and whether it is covered by insurance or other financial assistance. Taking into account all of these needs will ensure that the loved one is in a safe and comfortable environment that meets their individual needs. **Take a Tour of the Facility** When choosing an assisted living facility for a loved one, it is important to take a tour of the facility to get a good feel for the environment and the staff. During the tour, it is [important to ask questions](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/) and get a clear picture of the facility’s services and amenities. Ask questions such as what kind of healthcare is provided, what activities are available, what safety features are in place, and what kind of staff is on-site. Additionally, make sure to observe the environment, the cleanliness of the facility, the staff-to-resident ratio, and the interactions between staff and residents. It is also important to ask about any additional fees or costs that may be associated with the facility. This could include costs for meals, medications, additional services, or other fees. During the tour, try to get a good feel for the atmosphere of the facility and the overall care provided. Lastly, be sure to ask the staff any other questions you have, and take the time to get to know the staff and residents. Taking a tour of the facility is an important step in finding the right assisted living facility for a loved one. **Read Review** Reading reviews can be an invaluable resource when selecting an assisted living facility for a loved one. Reviews are typically written by current or former residents, and they can provide an inside look at the facility and the quality of care they offer. This can be especially helpful for those who cannot visit the facility in person. Through reviews, families can get an understanding of the atmosphere, staff, and overall experience of the residents. Additionally, reviews will often list the amenities that are available, such as activities and events, as well as any potential drawbacks. Online reviews are not the only source of information, however. Families should also take the time to speak with current residents of the facility to get a better understanding of their experience. Doing thorough research can help families make informed decisions and ensure that their loved one is receiving the best care possible. **Final Thoughts** Choosing the best assisted living facility for a loved one can be a daunting task. It is important to research the facility, visit the facility in person, and speak with staff and current residents. Additionally, it is important to keep in mind the specific needs and wants of your loved one, as well as the budget, to ensure the best fit. By taking the time to do your research, you can make sure that your loved one is placed in a safe, comfortable, and supportive environment that meets their needs and provides them with the best possible care. Provide your loved one with the best care possible with the help of Avery Heights. We are a rental-only community that provides [assisted living in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/our-community/). We offer a full continuum of care—including Assisted Living Memory Care—as well as distinctive offerings like 24-hour security, therapy seven days per week, and dental services. Get in touch with us today! **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [8 Tips for Talking to Your Loved One about Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/8-tips-for-talking-to-your-loved-one-about-senior-living/) **Published:** May 14, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When it comes to discussing senior living with your loved one, it can be challenging to know where to start. You want to make sure you approach the conversation in a way that is respectful and understanding of their feelings while also providing them with the information they need to make an informed decision. Here are some tips for talking to your loved one about senior living when they don’t want to. 1. **Start the Conversation Early** It’s important to start the conversation about senior living early so that your loved one has time to process the information and make a decision. This will also give you time to explore different options and discuss the pros and cons of each option. 2. **Listen to Their Concerns** When talking to your loved one about senior living, it’s essential to listen to their concerns and take them into consideration. It is natural for [seniors to feel a sense of loss of independence](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) or to be reluctant to leave their homes. Recognizing this and validating their feelings can help your loved one feel more comfortable discussing the topic. Ask them about their worries and how they see the situation playing out. This will help you determine what type of senior living option will work best for them. 3. **Provide Other Alternatives** Sometimes a senior living community is not the best option, and it is important to be prepared with other ideas. Consider in-home care, adult day care, or other services that may be beneficial for your loved one. 4. **Talk About the Benefits** When discussing senior living with your loved one, focus on the benefits. Talk about how senior living can provide them with access to medical care, recreational activities, social opportunities, and a safe and secure environment. 5. **Involve Other Family Members** Involve other family members in the conversation to show that it is a group decision. This can help your loved one feel less alone and more supported. 6. **Take a Tour** If your loved one is still hesitant to move into a senior living facility, take them on a tour of the facility. Let them see the amenities, get to know the staff, and [meet other residents](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/meet-our-residents/). This will help them get a better feel for the facility and may help them decide. 7. **Offer to Visit** Offer to visit senior living facilities with them. Seeing the facilities in person can help them make an informed decision and give them a better understanding of what senior living entails. 8. **Seek Professional Help** If your loved one is still unsure about moving into a senior living facility, consider talking to a professional. A geriatric care manager or social worker can help assess the situation and provide your loved one with the resources and support they need to make an informed decision. Talking to your loved one about senior living is never easy. But by approaching the conversation in a respectful and understanding way, you can help your loved one make an informed decision that is best for them. **Conclusion** Talking to your loved one about senior living can be a difficult task. You need to approach the topic with patience and understanding. Be sure to empathize with their feelings and try to communicate in a respectful manner. Listen to their concerns and try to find a solution that meets both of your needs. It is also beneficial to research the different types of senior living options available as well as the financial cost associated with them. Finally, offer to visit the facility together and discuss the move with other family members. As difficult as it may be, it is essential, to be honest and patient. With the right approach and information, you can successfully talk to your loved one about senior living even if they do not initially want to. If you’re looking for a top-notch [assisted living community in New Britain, CT](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/), you won’t want to miss Avery Heights. This retirement community offers an array of services and amenities to make [life easier and more enjoyable for seniors](https://averyheights.org/enhancing-the-quality-of-life-for-seniors-with-memory-care-at-avery-heights/). Contact us today to learn more about our community and to schedule a tour! **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [Advantages of Relocating to an Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/8-advantages-of-relocating-to-an-assisted-living-facility/) **Published:** February 10, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/ILnew-1024x308.jpg "ILnew - Avery Heights")Moving to an assisted living facility can be an appealing prospect for many seniors, as it offers a variety of benefits. Assisted living facilities provide more than just a place to live; they offer a wide range of services that help seniors maintain their independence while providing additional support and care. With an assisted living facility, seniors can enjoy a safe, secure, and comfortable residence with plenty of amenities and services. In this blog post, we’ll discuss the various advantages of relocating to an assisted living facility. **Personalized Care** Assisted living facilities offer personalized care for each resident. They provide assistance with daily activities such as dressing, bathing, and meal preparation, as well as access to medical care when needed. This type of care is tailored to each individual, so you can get the care and support you need. **Safety and Security** Assisted Living Facilities provide residents with a secure and safe environment. Facilities are staffed with trained professionals who are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week, to help with anything a resident may need. This provides peace of mind for both the resident and their family. Most facilities are also equipped with security systems, fire alarms, and other safety measures to help seniors feel safe and secure. As an added bonus, many assisted living facilities also offer transportation services, so seniors don’t have to worry about driving. **Socialization** Assisted living facilities often organize outings and activities that promote social interaction and engagement. This helps seniors to stay connected with their community and build relationships with others. In addition, these activities can also help to stimulate their minds and promote cognitive health. **Medical Care** Many facilities employ medical professionals, such as nurses and doctors, so you’ll have easy access to medical care should you need it. Plus, if you take regular medication, many facilities can arrange for it to be provided for you, so you don’t have to worry about running out or forgetting to take it. **Independence** Assisted Living Facilities provide residents with the independence to live their lives as they wish. Residents are able to move freely and do the activities they enjoy without having to worry about the daily tasks of living. This allows them to focus on their own interests and hobbies instead of worrying about mundane tasks. **Amenities** Assisted Living Facilities offer a wide range of amenities to residents. These can include on-site restaurants, [fitness centers,](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) libraries, swimming pools, and more. This helps to make life more enjoyable and entertaining for residents. **Cost Savings** Moving to an assisted living facility can be more cost-effective than living at home. Residents may be able to save on groceries, home maintenance, and other expenses. They may also be eligible for government benefits, which can help with the cost of living in an assisted living facility. **Flexible Living Options** Assisted living facilities offer a variety of living options, from private rooms to shared accommodations. This allows seniors to find the perfect living arrangement to suit their individual needs and preferences. **Conclusion** When it comes to making the decision to move to an assisted living facility, it’s important to weigh the pros and cons carefully. However, it’s clear that assisted living can provide many benefits for seniors who need a little extra support and assistance. Assisted living facilities offer personalized care, safety and security, socialization, medical care, independence, amenities, cost savings, and flexible living options. With the right information, making a move to an assisted living facility can be a positive experience for seniors and their families. Are you considering moving a family member into an assisted living facility? If so, Avery Heights is the perfect place for your loved one. At Avery Heights, we have comfortable and safe [assisted living cottages](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) with 24-hour security. Our experienced staff is dedicated to providing extra assistance to residents who need help with daily tasks. Contact us today to learn more! **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [Check out our latest post on TEEPASNOW.com!](https://averyheights.org/check-out-our-latest-post-on-teepasnow-com/) **Published:** December 12, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Finding a new normal after an acute event or post-traumatic stress can be daunting. That’s why we created our personalized orientation program highlighting the amenities of our campus and answering any questions you may have about life on-site, to help make it easier! Plus with our Resident Services Coordinator, Roseanne Holland, you can get the continued support you need to achieve happiness and success. Discover how The Heights at Avery Heights can help you regain joy and fulfillment in your new normalcy. > [When Life Throws You a Curveball](https://teepasnow.com/blog/when-life-throws-you-a-curveball/) **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Characteristics of a Great Assisted Living Community](https://averyheights.org/characteristics-of-a-great-assisted-living-community/) **Published:** March 28, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Assisted Living Community, Assisted Living Blog Post Banner - March 28](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/AH-header-5-1024x308.jpg "AH-header-5 - Avery Heights")Today, tens of thousands of elderly people are housed in senior flats and retirement communities nationwide. Senior living facilities more closely approach communities than mere residences. Due to the fact that not all communities offer the same caliber of utilities, it is challenging to locate an apartment with these features. Your living circumstance affects the quality of care and services you get. With that being said, senior living includes independent living, supported living, mental [health care, and short-term care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/). Knowing the best qualities of assisted living communities is best for the physical and emotional well-being of seniors. Read on to discover more today. ### **Professional Care Personnel** Workers in the community should take into account both your needs and those of other residents. They also call for job expertise. So you can rely on them to safeguard your community’s pleasure and safety. If you need personal attention, the staff shouldn’t be overworked. Your view of the city will change as a result of the knowledgeable personnel. ### **Community-Centric Environment** Socialization is necessary for society. You desire to socialize and blend in. Therefore, a theater or a place for arts and crafts ought to offer amusement and [social activities](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/). A society that places a high priority on health will undoubtedly be structured differently. If they want to, they should be allowed to socialize. ### **Protection and Security** The majority of senior living facilities have security devices. However, security must come first. Security cams cannot see or hear everything, but a good community will make its safety procedures clear and put you at ease. Buildings also present safety risks. In a safe neighborhood, broken windows and difficult-to-open doors are rare. ### **Maintenance** Facilities for senior care should be immaculate. Your time will be improved by these things. Routine maintenance is necessary for the residents’ convenience and protection. A top-notch elderly living facility won’t worry you. Due to a lack of employees, you do not want a missing carpet or dirty clothes. Find a reliable deal for the upkeep of assisted living. Think about a group’s substance rather than quantity. ### **Outstanding Facilities** Reputable communities’ contracts outline essential benefits. These include telephones, TVs, and refrigerators. Community staff must be aware of and understand these things in order to assist you in arranging them. Outside the parameters of your arrangement, towels, and linens might be needed. This will make it easier for your party to move. Find out which senior living facilities are accessible where you’re going. Make sure your town has enough facilities. A town shouldn’t be so tiny that it’s hard to find TV rooms and gyms. ### **Dietary Diversity** Every town should offer wholesome food. Some towns place a high priority on the dietary needs of their residents. Let’s say you adhere to a particular routine. (vegetarian, kosher, or halal). You should find enough sustenance in this situation to prevent hunger. ### **Accessibility** If you’re looking for senior living, this could be crucial. Make sure you can enter units that suit your needs quickly. Moving in with close family requires being available. Before choosing, make several calls to the community because its availability might alter if more people apply to live there. ### **Affordability** Costs for senior housing should be on a level with those in other areas. A good community will ask the same concerns that other nearby communities do. Senior communities are less costly than traditional homes because they have fewer resources. They won’t charge as much as you think. ### **Conclusion** When it comes to assisted living communities for seniors, you want the best of all worlds. After all, this is a chapter of a senior’s life where they should be able to live life to the fullest while there is time. Now that you know the best characteristics of a good assisted living community, you can make the best choice for your elder relative and your family. Are you looking for the best [assisted living in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/)? Avery Heights offers a home away from home for all seniors. Contact us today to learn more about our community! **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living --- ### [Everything You Need To Know About Long-Term Care For Seniors](https://averyheights.org/everything-you-need-to-know-about-long-term-care-for-seniors/) **Published:** March 7, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** [![Long-Term Care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/2023apfm-1024x303.jpg "2023apfm - Avery Heights")](http://https://averyheights.org/) Getting old is a natural process, but it doesn’t mean seniors have to depend on others for the rest of their lives. They can still live independently and enjoy their golden years with proper care. In this article, we will discuss some important things you should know about long-term care for seniors so you can make an informed decision when choosing a facility. ## **What is Long Term Care?** Long-term care is the medical, nursing, or rehabilitative services given to a person who cannot perform activities of daily living (ADLs) because of a chronic illness or disability. It is also known as custodial care and may be provided in a residential setting or the home. Long-term care aims to improve the quality of life for an individual with an illness by assisting with activities of daily living (ADLs). This can include help with bathing, eating, dressing, walking, and other activities that allow them to remain independent. Long-term [care may also include assistance](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-quality-senior-care/) with medication management, budgeting, and obtaining information about other available resources. ## **What Are the Types of Long-Term Care?** There are two types of long-term care: - **Personal Care:** This is the assistance you need to carry out your daily activities and may include help with bathing, dressing, eating, grooming, and other tasks. - **Skilled Care:** Can be provided by home health aides, personal care assistants, and nursing assistants. These caregivers give you help with your daily activities and may also assist with basic medical tasks like taking vital signs and administering medication. ## **There Are Several Types Of Long-Term Care Available such as:** ### **Nursing Homes** Nursing homes are the traditional form of long-term care. They are staffed 24 hours a day and provide around-the-clock nursing care. Nursing homes also offer special programs (like physical therapy) and medical services unavailable in other facilities. ### **In-Home Services One of the most common options is in-home services such as home health aides and private nurses. These services assist with daily activities such as bathing, dressing, meal preparation, and medication management. They also provide companionship and emotional support. ### **Hospice Care** Hospice care is a special type of end-of-life care that focuses on comfort, not cure. Hospice may be the best option for your loved one if they are terminally ill and have accepted their death. It’s also a good choice if your family member is in their final years, but can still carry out daily activities. ### **Assisted Living Facilities** This facility provides supervision and assistance with daily activities such as bathing and dressing for residents who need it. The staff usually work in shifts, so there’s always someone around if residents need help during the night or early morning hours. Residents usually share a room with one or two other people and have access to common areas such as kitchens, dining rooms, and living rooms where they can socialize with their peers. ### **Conclusion** Long-term care is not a luxury but a necessity for seniors who need help. If you are looking for something like this, research the facilities in your area and pick one that has the best reputation and cares for your loved ones. In addition, it is important to talk with your loved ones about their needs and requirements. It is not easy for any family member to see their parents or grandparents aging, but you can make their [lives easier by providing them with the best care](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-in-ct-a-comprehensive-guide-to-quality-senior-care/) possible. Avery Heights is a premier provider of [assisted living in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/home-care-hartford-ct/?Their). We offer the best in long-term care. Our facilities are fully staffed with licensed nurses and other healthcare professionals who will ensure your loved ones get attention. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Parkinson's Caregiver Support Group - May 6, 2024](https://averyheights.org/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-may-6-2024/) **Published:** April 29, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Parkinson's Caregiver Support Group - May 6, 2024](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Pd-Support-Group-Apr24-1-scaled-1.jpg "Pd-Support-Group-Apr24 - Avery Heights")\#image\_title **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Check Out Our Latest Post On TEEPASNOW.COM!](https://averyheights.org/check-out-our-latest-post-on-teepasnow-com-2/) **Published:** June 20, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When a person is affected by dementia, the journey can be overwhelming for everyone involved. However, with the right mindset and strategies, care partners can create a safe, comforting environment that supports the well-being of the person living with dementia as the disease progresses. Discover why engagement is crucial in caregiving. Learn practical tips and strategies for fostering engagement from our latest Teepa Snow blog post. Start engaging today! [The Need For Engagement Is Now!](https://teepasnow.com/blog/the-need-for-engagement-is-now/) **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [How to Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle in Your Golden Years](https://averyheights.org/how-to-maintain-a-healthy-lifestyle-in-your-golden-years/) **Published:** June 1, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** As we age, so do our physical and emotional needs. Aging gracefully and maintaining a healthy lifestyle in our golden years is essential to lead a happy and fulfilling life. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle requires a combination of a balanced diet, regular exercise, social engagement, and mental stimulation. In this article, we’ll discuss how to maintain a healthy lifestyle in your golden years. **Maintain a Balanced Diet** A balanced diet is crucial to maintain good health in your golden years. Our metabolism slows down, and our body requires fewer calories as we age. It is crucial to eat nutrient-dense foods that provide essential vitamins and minerals. A healthy diet for a senior citizen should include whole grains, fruits, vegetables, lean protein, and healthy fats. Avoid processed foods, sugary drinks, and excessive alcohol consumption. A balanced diet can help older adults maintain a healthy weight, prevent chronic diseases such as diabetes, heart disease, and cancer, and improve cognitive function. It’s incredibly important to speak with your doctor or a registered dietitian to develop a customized meal plan that meets your dietary needs. **Stay Active** Regular exercise is a significant part of maintaining good health in your golden years. Exercise helps to improve cardiovascular health, maintain muscle mass, and prevent chronic diseases such as diabetes, heart disease, and osteoporosis. Engaging in various physical activities such as walking, swimming, yoga, or tai chi is essential to keep your body active and healthy. Consult with your physician before trying out any exercise program. Exercise can also improve mood, reduce stress, and improve cognitive function. It is recommended that adults over 65 engage in at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic exercise each week. Strength training exercises should also be included to maintain muscle mass. **Stay Socially Engaged** Social isolation and loneliness can negatively impact your mental and physical health. Staying [socially engaged and maintaining](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) strong relationships with family and friends is essential. Joining community groups or clubs, volunteering, and attending [social events can help to improve your social connections](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) and overall well-being. Social engagement can also reduce the risk of depression, cognitive decline, and dementia. It’s essential to try to stay [connected with loved ones and make new social](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) connections. **Stay Mentally Stimulated** Mental stimulation is essential to maintain brain health in your golden years. Engage in activities challenging your brain, such as puzzles, reading, writing, or learning a new language or skill. Staying updated with current events and trends is essential to stay mentally sharp. Mental stimulation can improve cognitive function, memory, and overall brain health. It is recommended that adults over 65 [engage in mentally stimulating activities](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) regularly. **Get Enough Sleep** Getting adequate sleep is incredibly important for good health in your golden years. Sleep helps restore and repair the body, improve memory and concentration, and boost the immune system. It is recommended that adults over 65 get between seven to eight hours of sleep nightly. Developing good sleep habits, such as going to bed and waking up at the same time each day, can help to improve sleep quality. Sleeping well can improve mood, reduce stress, and improve overall health. It’s essential to consult your doctor if you have trouble sleeping or experience sleep disturbances. **Stay Hydrated** Staying hydrated is crucial for good health in your golden years. Our bodies become less efficient at regulating fluid levels as we age, and dehydration can lead to various health problems. Drink lots of water and avoid sugary drinks and excessive alcohol consumption. Staying hydrated can improve cognitive function, physical performance, and overall health. It is recommended that adults over 65 drink at least eight glasses of water each day. **Final Thoughts** Maintaining a healthy lifestyle in your senior years is vital to lead a happy and fulfilling life. Eating a balanced diet, staying active, socially engaged, and mentally stimulated, getting enough sleep, and staying hydrated are all essential to maintain good health. Embrace your golden years and make the most of them by prioritizing your health and well-being. By following these vital tips, you can enjoy a healthy and fulfilling life in your golden years. Maintain a healthy lifestyle in your golden years with the help of Avery Heights. We are a senior living community that offers quality [senior independent living cottages in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/independent-living-hartford-ct/). Our staff has gained a solid reputation for providing seamless care and convenient living—all for great value. Get in touch with us today! **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Assisted Living - Dispelling the Most Common Misconceptions](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living_-dispelling-the-most-common-misconceptions/) **Published:** June 27, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** As the senior population continues to grow, many families consider assisted living a viable option for their loved ones. However, many myths and misconceptions surrounding senior living can prevent families from making the best decisions for their aging family members. In this article, we will debunk some of the most common myths about assisted living. **Myth #1: Assisted Living Is Like a Nursing Home** One of the most common misconceptions about assisted living is that it is similar to a nursing home. While both provide care for seniors, assisted living facilities are designed to be more comfortable, homelike environments. Residents live in private or semi-private apartments, have their own furniture and decorations, and can receive personalized care and attention. Assisted living communities offer various activities and amenities like fitness classes, social events, and restaurant-style dining. **Myth #2: Seniors Lose Their Independence in Assisted Living** Another myth about assisted living is that seniors lose their independence when they move into a facility. In reality, assisted living is designed to help seniors maintain their independence while still receiving the care and support they need. Residents can receive assistance with activities of daily living, such as bathing, dressing, and medication management, while still being able to make their own decisions and participate in activities that interest them. **Myth #3: Assisted Living Is Too Expensive** Many families hesitate to consider assisted living because they believe it is too expensive. However, the cost of assisted living varies depending on the location, amenities, and level of care provided. In many cases, assisted living can be more affordable than hiring in-home care or paying for a nursing home. Additionally, many assisted living facilities offer financial assistance programs and can work with families to find a payment plan that fits their budget. **Myth #4: Assisted Living Is Only for Seniors with Serious Health Issues** Some families believe assisted living is only for seniors with serious health issues or disabilities. However, assisted living is designed to meet the needs of seniors at various levels of health and ability. Residents can receive assistance with daily tasks, such as cooking and cleaning, as well as access to healthcare services and medication management. Additionally, assisted living communities offer a range of social and recreational activities to help seniors stay active and engaged. **Myth #5: Seniors Will Be Isolated in Assisted Living** One of families’ most significant concerns about assisted living is that their loved ones will be isolated and lonely. However, assisted living communities are designed to be social environments where residents can interact with one another and participate in group activities. Many assisted living communities offer a range of social events and activities, such as game nights, movie screenings, and group outings. Additionally, residents can have visitors and participate in activities outside the facility. **Conclusion** Assisted living can be an excellent option for seniors who want to maintain their independence while still receiving the care and support they need. However, many myths and misconceptions surrounding senior living can prevent families from making the best decisions for their loved ones. By debunking these myths and understanding what assisted living really entails, families can make informed decisions about the best senior living options for their aging family members. Avery Heights offers [senior living in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/assisted-living-hartford-ct/) that embraces the benefits of assisted living while dispelling any misconceptions. Our community provides personalized care and support, as well as a range of amenities and [social activities to help residents maintain](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) a fulfilling and vibrant lifestyle. Contact us today to learn more about our assisted living options and schedule a tour of our community. **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living, Senior Living --- ### [3 Important Aspects to Know about Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/3-important-aspects-to-know-about-independent-living/) **Published:** June 30, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/esther-ann-glpYh1cWf0o-unsplash-scaled-1-300x200.jpg "esther-ann-glpYh1cWf0o-unsplash - Avery Heights")Independent or assisted living is a lifestyle choice for many individuals who wish to maintain their independence and live in a community designed to meet their unique needs. Independent living has several key considerations, including the cost, the benefits, and the community. **The Costs** Independent living communities can be expensive, and it is essential to understand the financial implications of choosing this lifestyle. Many independent living communities charge a monthly fee that covers the cost of rent, utilities, and other amenities. The monthly fee can vary depending on the community’s location, size, and amenities. Some communities may charge patients additional fees for housekeeping, transportation, and meals. Researching and determining what you can afford before choosing an independent living community is important. Resources, including online calculators and financial planners, are available to help you calculate living costs in an independent living community. It is also important to consider your long-term financial goals and plan accordingly. **The Benefits** Assisted living communities offer many benefits, including a sense of community, socialization opportunities, and access to services and amenities. Living in an independent community can provide security and peace of mind, as many communities have 24-hour security and emergency response systems. Independent living communities also offer a variety of social activities and events, such as fitness classes, movie nights, and group outings. These [activities can help residents stay active and engaged,](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) providing opportunities to make new friends and connect with others with similar interests. Additionally, many independent living communities offer various services and amenities, such as housekeeping, transportation, and dining options. These services can make daily life easier and more enjoyable and allow residents to focus on what they enjoy. **The Community** The community is essential to independent living, as it can impact your overall quality of life. Choosing a community that aligns with your values and life is important and provides the necessary services and amenities. When researching independent living communities, it is important to consider location, size, and amenities. It would help if you also took the time to visit the community and speak with current residents to get a sense of the community’s culture and atmosphere. In addition, it is important to consider the level of care and support the community offers. Some independent living communities offer additional services and support as residents’ needs change, such as assisted living or memory care. It is important to choose a community that can accommodate your changing needs over time. **Over Six Decades of Promoting Independence and Care** Independent living is a lifestyle choice that can provide many benefits, including a sense of community, socialization opportunities, and access to services and amenities. However, it is important to consider the cost, benefits, and community when choosing an independent living community. By researching and choosing a community that aligns with your values and lifestyle, you can enjoy a [fulfilling and independent lifestyle](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) in your golden years. Avery Heights has established a strong reputation for delivering seamless care, convenient living, and exceptional value to seniors for over six decades. Being a rental-only community, you won’t have to worry about the hassle of paying entrance fees or navigating complicated contracts. However, you can still avail yourself of an exceptional continuum of care. Call 860-215-3686 for [assisted living in Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/independent-living-hartford-ct/). **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Assisted Living, independent living --- ### [Tips for Finding the Best Independent Living Community](https://averyheights.org/tips-for-finding-the-best-independent-living-community/) **Published:** July 10, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![senior independent living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/cdc-F98Mv9O6LfI-unsplash-scaled-1-300x200.jpg "cdc-F98Mv9O6LfI-unsplash - Avery Heights")Living independently can become challenging as we age; sometimes, it’s not the best decision to live alone at home. Seniors who desire to live in a community of like-minded people in a secure and encouraging atmosphere have many options in independent living communities. However, finding the right independent living community can be daunting, with many factors to consider. Below are some tips to help you find the best independent living community. **Location** The location of an independent living community is a crucial factor to consider. You want to find a community that is close to your family and friends, as well as your doctor’s office, hospital, and other essential services. To be able to engage in outdoor activities all year round, you might also wish to take into account a neighborhood that is situated in a region with a mild climate. **Facilities and Amenities** It’s important to consider the facilities and amenities that a community offers. Look for a community with a range of activities and services catering to your interests and hobbies. For example, if you enjoy swimming, look for a community with a swimming pool. If you enjoy socializing, look for a community with a clubhouse or community center where you can meet other residents. **Cost** You want to find an affordable community that still offers the services and facilities you need. Ensure you understand the costs involved, including any additional fees or charges that may be added. You may also want to consider communities that offer financial assistance or have programs to help you pay for living expenses. **Staffing** The staff at an independent living community plays a crucial role in your experience. You want to find a community with friendly and helpful staff members available to assist you when needed. Look for a community with a high staff-to-resident ratio, which means there are enough staff members to provide personalized attention to each resident. **Healthcare Services** As we age, healthcare becomes more important. Look for a community that offers healthcare services, such as on-site medical care, access to doctors and nurses, and medication management. You may also want to consider a community that has a partnership with a nearby hospital or healthcare provider. **Social Life** Socialization is an essential part of life, regardless of age. Look for a community that has a vibrant social life, with opportunities to [meet other residents](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/meet-our-residents/) and participate in activities and events. Consider a community that has a variety of clubs and social groups, such as book clubs, card games, and exercise classes. **Security and Safety** Look for a community that has 24-hour security, including surveillance cameras and security personnel. You may also want to consider a community that has emergency response systems in place, such as panic buttons or medical alert devices. **Cleanliness and Maintenance** Your quality of life may be greatly affected by the cleanliness and upkeep of a neighborhood. Look for a community that is well-maintained and clean, with well-manicured grounds and clean common areas. You may also want to consider a community that offers housekeeping and maintenance services so that you don’t have to worry about cleaning or repairs. **Conclusion** Choosing the ideal independent living facility is a serious choice that needs thorough investigation and thought. It’s important to remember that every individual has unique needs and preferences, and what works for one person may not work for another. Therefore, it’s crucial to take the time to explore various options and visit different communities to find the one that is the best fit for you. Avery Heights provides [senior independent living cottages near you](https://averyheights.org/independent-living-hartford-ct/)! Our community has built a strong reputation for offering elders seamless care, practical living, and exceptional value. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Avery Heights - Understanding the Aging Process - Health and Wellness Tips for Seniors at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/avery-heights-understanding-the-aging-process_-health-and-wellness-tips-for-seniors-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** August 11, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Aging Process](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/mother-and-daughter-having-fun-2023-11-27-05-12-53-utc-300x200.jpg "Mother and daughter having fun - Avery Heights") As we age, understanding the changes in our bodies and minds becomes increasingly essential to maintaining a high quality of life. At Avery Heights, we are dedicated to supporting our residents and their families through the aging process with educational, engaging, and evidence-based resources that promote physical, cognitive, and emotional health. In our upcoming blog series, we will discuss the aging process and share valuable tips backed by current research to help seniors navigate this dynamic period. By offering a rental-only senior living community, Avery Heights provides flexible housing choices without the burden of entrance fees or complex contracts. We pride ourselves on offering a continuum of exceptional care, focusing on seamless support, convenient living, and extraordinary value for our residents. We recognize the importance of promoting overall health and wellness throughout the various stages of aging. Our upcoming blog series will address critical aspects of physical health, emphasizing the importance of proper nutrition, regular exercise, and preventive healthcare measures for seniors. We will explore current research-backed recommendations and offer practical, easy-to-implement strategies for [maintaining a healthy lifestyle](https://averyheights.org/how-to-maintain-a-healthy-lifestyle-in-your-golden-years/) at Avery Heights. Cognitive health also plays a crucial role in aging well. Our blog content will address ways to keep the brain sharp and engaged, including activities that stimulate cognitive function, promote memory retention, and minimize the risk of age-related cognitive decline. We will also discuss the significance of [social connections and emotional support to maintain](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) cognitive health. Perhaps most importantly, our blog series will emphasize the value of emotional well-being in aging. We will explore strategies to manage stress, foster resilience, and maintain a positive outlook on life. By offering a comprehensive [wellness program that encompasses physical and emotional](https://averyheights.org/the-importance-of-emotional-wellness-in-senior-living-at-avery-heights/) well-being, we strive to create an environment where residents can lead fulfilling, balanced lives. Avery Heights proudly offers various activities, programs, and services to support our residents’ diverse health and wellness needs. Through our blog content, we seek to provide seniors and their families with educational, informative, and helpful resources that empower them to make informed decisions about their health and happiness during aging. As we delve into these topics, we aim to deliver valuable information that yields long-lasting benefits for our residents and their loved ones. **Life at Avery Heights: Experiencing a Dynamic Community of Active Seniors** 1. *Diverse Activities for Physical Fitness and Emotional Well-being* At Avery Heights, we understand that staying active is crucial for maintaining physical and emotional health, especially in one’s golden years. Our community offers extensive activities to engage our residents, promote socialization, and encourage them to lead healthy, meaningful lives. Fitness classes, like yoga, tai chi, and strength training, accommodate various levels of ability and interests. We also have walking clubs and swimming sessions that provide enjoyable and low-impact exercise options for seniors. In addition to fitness activities, we offer arts and crafts workshops, music appreciation sessions, and events designed to stimulate the mind and promote creativity. Residents can take painting or ceramics classes, join a book club, or engage in friendly chess matches with their neighbors. With a focus on continuous learning, Avery Heights encourages residents to explore new activities that pique their interest and ignite their passions. 2. *Celebrating Special Occasions and Fostering a Sense of Belonging* At the heart of the Avery Heights community is a genuine sense of belonging cultivated through the celebration of special occasions and communal achievements. Our dedicated staff ensures that birthdays, anniversaries, and national holidays are commemorated with festivities that bring our residents together and strengthen their bond. We also celebrate the personal accomplishments of our residents, whether it’s completing a significant personal project, volunteering, or marking a milestone in their lives. This established camaraderie extends to the relationships that residents have with our skilled team of healthcare professionals and non-medical staff, who work diligently to create a warm and nurturing environment. It’s this sense of togetherness that defines life at Avery Heights, ensuring that every resident feels supported and valued. 3. *Enriching Educational Programs and Intellectual Stimulation* Lifelong learning is a cornerstone of our community at Avery Heights. We offer myriad educational [programs and events to engage](https://averyheights.org/engaging-activities-and-enriching-social-programs-at-avery-heights/) our residents, broaden their knowledge, and promote intellectual stimulation. These programs encompass diverse topics, including lectures and discussion series on history, politics, and culture. Guest speakers and performers regularly visit to share their unique talents and insights with our residents. Furthermore, our community provides ample access to resources that foster learning and critical thinking. Our on-site library features an extensive collection of books, periodicals, DVDs, and other media that our residents can enjoy at leisure. We also encourage residents to start discussions and debates, nurturing a dynamic and intellectually engaged community. 4. *Embracing a Vibrant Social Scene and Fostering Friendships* Social connections play a significant role in seniors’ well-being, directly affecting their quality of life. At Avery Heights, we actively cultivate a thriving social scene, hosting events and gatherings that allow residents to socialize, make new friends, and maintain existing relationships. Movie nights, game nights, and themed parties encourage our community members to get to know each other and create lasting memories together. Our residents also have the opportunity to participate in regular outings to local attractions, shops, and restaurants. From visits to art galleries and museums to group excursions to parks and nature reserves, these trips offer enjoyable and shared experiences beyond our community’s walls. **Conclusion** Life at Avery Heights is the epitome of what active senior living should be: a dynamic, welcoming community that offers residents endless opportunities for engagement and growth. Our community goes above and beyond to create an environment where seniors can thrive by prioritizing physical fitness, emotional well-being, intellectual stimulation, and active [social lives](https://averyheights.org/maintaining-social-connections-in-senior-living-communities/) for its residents. Our upcoming blog series will provide a comprehensive look into life at Avery Heights, showcasing our residents’ stories and illustrating the remarkable experiences that await within our community. We are delighted to share the vibrant, fulfilling life that unfolds within these halls and invites prospective residents and their families to explore and join our exceptional community. Contact us today for more details about our [assisted living in Hartford](https://averyheights.org/skilled-nursing-hartford-ct/). **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Short-Term Rehab Centers: Paving the Path to Quick Recovery and Quality Care](https://averyheights.org/short-term-rehab-centers-paving-the-path-to-quick-recovery-and-quality-care/) **Published:** April 22, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Short-Term Rehab Centers, Short-Term Rehab](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/asian-disabled-senior-man-sitting-on-sofa-doing-ph-2023-11-27-04-49-50-utc-300x200.jpg "asian-disabled-senior-man-sitting-on-sofa-doing-ph-2023-11-27-04-49-50-utc - Avery Heights")Navigating the healthcare landscape for yourself or a loved one can be one of the most daunting tasks families or caregivers face. Understanding short-term rehab and its benefits becomes paramount when a situation requires dedicated rehabilitation. In this comprehensive guide, we’ll walk through the key aspects and advantages of short-term rehab centers, aiding caregivers, the elderly, and healthcare professionals in making informed decisions. ## The Growing Need for Short-Term Rehab Services With global demographics showing an upward trend in the aging population, the demand for specialized healthcare services has risen sharply. Short-term rehab centers have emerged as critical waypoints for those recovering from surgeries, acute illnesses, or other medical events that necessitate intensive but temporary care. This surge in interest in short-term rehab reflects not just an immediate need but a sustained requirement for adaptable, short-term care solutions. ## Understanding Short-Term Rehab What distinguishes short-term rehab from long-term care? Short-term rehab, as the name implies, serves as a bridge between a hospital [stay and a return to regular life](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/). It’s a focused, comprehensive program to accelerate recovery and independent living. Unlike long-term care facilities, which are tailored for those with chronic illnesses or ongoing health management, short-term rehab centers offer specialized care for a fleeting but critical stint in a patient’s health journey. ## Benefits of Short-Term Rehab for Patients The structured programs of short-term rehab play a pivotal role in patient recovery. They’re crafted to maximize each individual’s potential for swift recuperation. Patients can expect enhanced rehabilitation services, which often translate to speedier recovery, a focus on physical and mental well-being, and comprehensive [care that fosters independence](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/). Short-term rehab services create a supportive environment that significantly augments the healing process by catering to the unique needs of post-acute patients. ## The Role of Caregivers in Short-Term Rehab The involvement of caregivers in the decision-making process for short-term rehab is as vital as it is in supportive care at home. Caregivers are first-hand observers of their loved one’s needs and play a significant role in recovery. Their understanding of the patient’s medical history, personal preferences, and hopes for recovery dictates their importance as collaborative partners in healthcare choices. ## Choosing the Right Rehab Center Selecting the best short-term rehab center is critical to the rehabilitation process. Caregivers and healthcare professionals should consider the center’s expertise in the patient’s particular condition, the quality and range of rehabilitation services offered, testimonials from previous patients, and the facility’s proximity to the patient’s support network. When evaluating rehab centers, [personalized care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) and a structured commitment to patient engagement should also be on the checklist. ## The Future of Short-Term Rehab and Healthcare As with many facets of healthcare, short-term rehab services are not immune to evolving trends and technological advancements. The future may witness an increased integration of telemedicine, personalized medical devices, and data analytics to tailor rehabilitation experiences further. Patient-centered care models will also gain prominence, ensuring that recovery programs are as unique as the patients who undergo them. ## Conclusion: The Vital Role of Short-Term Rehab in the Healthcare System Short-term rehab centers epitomize the essence of healthcare designed for healing and restoration. For the elderly, patients, and families, they offer a beacon of hope and a pathway to reclaiming [independence and well-being](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/). Every step in selecting a short-term rehab center must be thoughtful and deliberate, ensuring the best possible rehabilitation experience for those in your care. If you’re considering a short-term rehab center, remember that it’s not just about finding a facility that fulfills medical needs but one that enriches lives throughout the recovery process. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Discovering Assisted Living in Hartford: A Comprehensive Guide for Seniors and Caregivers](https://averyheights.org/discovering-assisted-living-in-hartford-a-comprehensive-guide-for-seniors-and-caregivers/) **Published:** May 22, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![hartford connecticut, Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/hartford-connecticut-usa-skyline-2023-11-27-05-05-13-utc-300x200.jpg "Hartford, Connecticut, USA Skyline - Avery Heights")Hartford, Connecticut Navigating the world of assisted living can be daunting for seniors and their caregivers. With its rich history and vibrant community, Hartford offers a diverse range of assisted living options tailored to meet the varied needs of its senior residents. In this comprehensive guide, we’ll explore what assisted living entails, highlight the unique features of assisted living in Hartford, and provide tips for choosing the right facility. ## Understanding Assisted Living Assisted living facilities are designed to provide [seniors personalized care](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) in a residential setting. These facilities offer a blend of independence and support, ensuring residents can access the assistance they need while maintaining their autonomy. Services typically include meal preparation, housekeeping, medication management, and various social and wellness activities. ## The Assisted Living Experience in Hartford Hartford stands out for its commitment to offering a holistic approach to senior living. Facilities like Avery Heights exemplify the city’s dedication to combining healthcare, comfort, and [lifestyle to enrich senior rich seniors’](https://averyheights.org/keeping-seniors-active-and-engaged_-tips-for-a-fulfilling-lifestyle-at-avery-heights/) environments. ### Avery Heights: A Closer Look Avery Heights is a prime example of Hartford’s exceptional assisted living community. With over 50 years of experience, Avery Heights prioritizes healthcare, safety, and vibrant living. Their approach to assisted living apartments emphasizes comfort, convenience, and security, with a 24-hour staff ready to provide additional assistance. **Key Features of Avery Heights:** - **Wellness Center**: Avery Heights promotes an active lifestyle with its state-of-the-art Wellness Center, encouraging residents to live life to the fullest. - **Memory Care**: For individuals requiring memory support, Avery Heights offers a peaceful, bright, and cheerful environment that respects each resident’s dignity. - **Comprehensive Care**: In addition to assisted living, Avery Heights provides short-term rehabilitation, home healthcare services, and long-term skilled nursing care, ensuring a continuum of care within the community. ## How to Choose the Right Assisted Living Facility Selecting the right assisted living facility ensures a smooth transition and a positive experience. Here are some factors to consider: 1. **Services and Amenities**: Assess the services and amenities offered to ensure they meet your or your loved one’s needs. 2. **Staff and Care**: Evaluate the staff’s qualifications, experience, and approachability. A dedicated and compassionate team is essential. 3. **Community Culture**: Visit the facility and observe the community culture. Look for an environment that feels welcoming and engaging. 4. **Safety and Security**: Confirm the facility’s safety measures, including 24-hour security and emergency response systems. ## The Impact of Assisted Living on Seniors and Caregivers Choosing the right assisted living facility can significantly improve seniors’ quality of life and provide caregivers peace of mind. Residents benefit from [personalized care, social engagement, and independence, while caregivers](https://averyheights.org/personalized-care-services-at-avery-heights_-ensuring-seniors-comfort-well-being-and-independence/) can feel confident in the safety and well-being of their loved ones. ## Conclusion Assisted living in Hartford offers seniors a blend of independence, support, and community. Facilities like Avery Heights set the standard for excellence, providing a safe, enriching, and caring environment for seniors to thrive. If you’re considering assisted living for yourself or a loved one, Hartford’s diverse options ensure you’ll find the perfect fit. We encourage readers to share their experiences or ask questions about assisted living in Hartford. Your insights can help others in their search for the ideal community. For those interested in learning more about Avery Heights and scheduling a tour, don’t hesitate to contact [860.245.9629](tel:+18602459629). Choosing an assisted living facility is a significant decision, but with the right information and support, you can find a place where you or your loved one will flourish. **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ### [Parkinson's Caregiver Support Group - Medications for Parkinson's: What You Need to Know](https://averyheights.org/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-medications-for-parkinsons-what-you-need-to-know/) **Published:** April 9, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Pd-Support-Group-Apr24-scaled-1.jpg "Pd-Support-Group-Apr24 - Avery Heights")\#image\_title **Categories:** Uncategorized --- ## Pages ### [Welcome to Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/) **Published:** July 24, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENTLIVING") ## HEALTHCARE CONTINUUM OF CARE # Avery Heights: Greater Hartford’s First Choice for Retirement Living For over 50 years, Avery Heights has been a trusted leader in retirement living, evolving to meet the changing needs of seniors while maintaining a commitment to aging well. Avery Heights offers priority access to a full continuum of healthcare services with no buy-in fee, making it an accessible and flexible option for retirement living. Located near West Hartford and Newington, the community provides easy access to shopping, dining, cultural activities, and scenic parks so residents can enjoy a rich and fulfilling lifestyle. Avery Heights is situated on secure, well-maintained grounds, providing all residents with a comfortable and supportive environment. As a not-for-profit organization owned by Church Homes, Inc., Avery Heights is dedicated to providing high-quality living and healthcare services that support independence and well-being. Residents enjoy a vibrant community where they can live life to the fullest. Join us and start your next chapter in a community that values comfort, security, and a fulfilling lifestyle. [Contact us](https://averyheights.org/contact/) today to learn more! #### **Listen** ##### **Your Next Chapter Senior Living** Our podcasts provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and more, host Siobhan Mattingly will help guide you as you begin Your Next Chapter. [ Listen to our Podcast ](https://averyheights.org/podcasts/) !["Your Next Chapter Senior Living podcast hosted by Siobhan Mattingly at Avery Heights Hartford CT"](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/podcast-img.webp "podcast-img") ![Skilled nursing care at Avery Heights continuing care retirement community Hartford CT](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/skilled-nursing.webp "skilled-nursing") #### **Caring** ##### **Avery Heights Health Services** As a full-service Continuing Care Retirement Community, Avery Heights provides a full continuum of on-site high-quality senior healthcare. When a loved one is no longer safe living at home or when caring for a loved one requires more care than family and friends can provide Avery Heights Health Services is the place to turn for compassionate care in a cozy and comfortable environment. [ Learn More ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/)#### **Support** ##### **Avery Heights Supports Veterans** At The Heights, we celebrate our veterans all year long in many ways, whether through dedications to certain individuals, community events, or programs. We believe that honoring our service men and women should not be limited to military holidays and recognitions. [ Learn More ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/supporting-veterans/) ![Avery Heights veterans support program - honoring service members in Hartford CT](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/supports-vets.webp "supports-vets") ![Senior living community at Avery Heights Hartford Connecticut](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/Unknown-1.webp "Unknown") #### **Getting Started…** ##### **Your Next Chapter in Senior Living** For years, our talented staff has ensured that residents living in Avery Heights’ apartments and cottages continue living independently. Residents at Avery Heights know that “zest” is the ingredient here that sets it apart from other senior living communities. Our state-of-the-art Wellness Center is available, so you’ll be inspired to live life to the fullest. [ Learn More ](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/)[ ](#) ## Contact Us ### FOR MORE INFORMATION The search for senior living options can be overwhelming. Our team is here to help! Schedule a tour or one-on-one conversation with a member of our sales team. We look forward to answering your questions and guiding you and your family on the road to residency. ### SCHEDULE A TOUR Join us on campus and experience first-hand what life is like at Avery Heights. Call us at [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201), or fill out the adjacent form: ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Large-Tree-300x300.png) Comments This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. Name(Required) First Last Email(Required) Phone(Required) Message(Required) Stay Connected Send me the monthly newsletter with helpful resources for older adults and their families. Submit Δ --- ### [Marjorie B. Doty Aquatic Center](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/) **Published:** August 13, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS FITNESS CENTER ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/ "WELLNESSFITNESS CENTER") ## [ WELLNESS WALKING TRAILS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/ "WELLNESSWALKING TRAILS") # Majorie B. Doty Aquatic Center Since 2008, residents have enjoyed swimming year-round in our heated indoor pool. Graduated steps and handrails make the pool’s warm water easily accessible. To fully enjoy the many benefits of aquatic therapy, certified swim instructors conduct special classes and supervise open swim sessions. - Aquacise class emphasizes stretching, toning, and cardio exercise to improve energy and fitness levels without impacting joints. No swimming skills are required. - Arthritis class increases range of motion and relieves arthritis pain through gentle exercises. No swimming skills are required. - Water-walking class gently exercises the joints to increase fitness. Thirty minutes of water walking is equivalent to two hours of walking on land. No swimming skills are required. The Marjorie B. Doty Aquatic Center is also open to non-residents. To register for a class, sign up for a membership, or inquire about membership, please contact Mark Modifica at mmodifica@churchhomes.org or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 450. ## Come See the Difference The best way to experience The Heights at Avery Heights is with a personal tour. Explore our residences, meet our team, and discover what makes our community feel like home. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) --- ### [Vision and Mission](https://averyheights.org/about-us/vision-and-mission/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING SERVICES AND AMENITIES ](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/ "INDEPENDENT LIVINGSERVICES AND AMENITIES") # Our Mission and Vision At Avery Heights ## **Mission:** The mission of Avery Heights is to provide, on a not‑for‑profit basis and without discrimination, a comprehensive range of residential living options and health care services for older adults. To fulfill this mission, Avery Heights is committed to: 1. **Promoting and implementing systems that uphold each individual’s optimal independence and honor their personal life wishes**, while ensuring a safe, dignified environment that supports a high‑quality retirement experience. 2. **Ensuring knowledgeable, consistent, and compassionate leadership** across all areas of retirement living, long‑term care, home care, and supportive services. 3. **Developing and advancing innovative programs and services** that anticipate and respond to the evolving needs of residents, clients, and the broader society we serve. Avery Heights’ policies, practices, and procedures are designed to support and sustain the successful fulfillment of this mission. ## **Vision:** The Heights envisions a community where every older adult lives with purpose, dignity, and true independence-supported by compassionate care, exemplary leadership, and innovative services that evolve with their needs. We strive to be the region’s trusted leader in senior living by cultivating a vibrant, inclusive environment where safety, wellness, connection, and personal choice guide every experience. Through continuous innovation, collaboration, and a commitment to excellence, The Heights seeks to redefine retirement living-empowering each individual to live their best life at every stage of aging. ![Avery Heights 207](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Avery-Heights-207-300x175.png "Avery Heights 207") ![The Heights Logo](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/The-heights-trans-back.png "The-heights-trans-back") --- ### [Affiliations and Partnerships](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") ## [ HEALTH SERVICES ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/ "HEALTH SERVICES") # Affiliations and Partnerships ## [Podiatry](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/podiatrist/) Podiatry Services In The Privacy Of Your Home [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/podiatrist/) ## [Hearing Services](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/hearing-aid-specialist/) We Provide The Best In Hearing Services. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/hearing-aid-specialist/) ## [Dermatology](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/dermatologist/) Expert Skin Care Directly To You. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/dermatologist/) ## [4 Legged Pet Service](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/pet-care/) A Variety Of Pet Care Offerings. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/pet-care/) ## [CT-APDA](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/ct-apda/) Understanding Parkinson’s Disease. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/ct-apda/) --- ### [Program and Activities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/program-and-activities/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ SERVICES AND AMENITIES DINING ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) ## [ SERVICES AND AMENITIES WELLNESS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/) ##### Modal Popup – ID Click here to edit the "Modal Popup" settings. This text will not be visible on frontend. # Make New Memories There’s so much to see! Just minutes away from downtown Hartford, we provide coaches to the city so residents can experience the many cultural highlights. Go to Blue Back Square for dinner, shopping, or a movie. Or stay on our active, 43-acre campus. Mingle with other residents during cocktail hour, attend one of our concerts, savor delicious snacks and refreshing beverages at a tea party, or get fit by joining an exercise class. There’s all that and more! ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/08/September-2026_1-940x1536.jpg) [Click to download](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/08/September-2026_1.pdf) ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Unknown.jpeg)## Wondering What Life Is Really Like at The Heights? Don’t just take a tour—spend the day with us. - Meet residents - Enjoy lunch - Join activities Experience the “welcoming lifestyle” that makes The Heights feel like home. [ Schedule Your Complimentary Day in the Life Experience ](/day-in-the-life-request/) Submit your request today and a member of our team will contact you to schedule your personalized experience. **Siobhan Mattingly**, Director of Marketing [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403 --- ### [PD In Motion](https://averyheights.org/wellness/pd-in-motion/) **Published:** July 7, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS FITNESS CENTER ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) ## [ WELLNESS POOL ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/) # PD In Motion ## **Parkinson’s in Motion at The Heights** ### **Empowering Movement. Inspiring Hope.** Living with Parkinson’s disease can present daily challenges, but it doesn’t mean giving up independence, purpose, or the activities you love. At The Heights at Avery Heights, our **Parkinson’s in Motion Program** is designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s maintain strength, confidence, and connection through exercise, education, support, and community. We believe independence isn’t about doing everything alone-it’s about having the tools, resources, and support to live life on your terms. Through specialized programs like Rock Steady Boxing®, Dance for PD®, support groups, educational events, and therapy services, we’re helping people with Parkinson’s move better, feel stronger, and stay engaged in the things that matter most. Most programs are **free and open to the community**, because everyone deserves access to resources that empower movement and inspire hope. --- ## **Parkinson’s Support Group** ### **Connect. Share. Learn.** You are not alone on this journey. Our monthly Parkinson’s Support Group offers a welcoming and supportive environment for individuals living with Parkinson’s disease and their care partners. Whether you are newly diagnosed or have been living with Parkinson’s for years, you’ll find encouragement, practical information, and meaningful connections. ### **Benefits of Participating** - Connect with others who understand your experiences - Share challenges and successes in a supportive setting - Learn practical strategies for managing symptoms - Gain access to educational resources and community support - Build confidence, resilience, and hope **When:** First Wednesday of every month | 10:30 AM – 11:30 AM **Where:** Adams Room, The Heights at Avery Heights **Cost:** Free and open to the public --- ## **Rock Steady Boxing®** ### **Fight Back Against Parkinson’s** Rock Steady Boxing® is a non-contact, evidence-based fitness program created specifically for people living with Parkinson’s disease. Through boxing-inspired exercises and functional movement training, participants work to improve mobility, strength, balance, coordination, and endurance. ### **Benefits Include** - Improved balance and coordination - Increased strength and stamina - Enhanced agility and cognitive engagement - Reduced risk of falls - Greater confidence and quality of life Research continues to show that exercise plays a vital role in managing Parkinson’s symptoms and improving overall well-being. Just as important, participants become part of a supportive community that motivates and encourages one another. **When:** Every Tuesday | 1:30 PM – 2:30 PM **Where:** Thompson Room, The Heights at Avery Heights **Cost:** Free and open to the community **Supported by Grant Funding from** ![APDA logo for the American Parkinson Disease Association, Connecticut Chapter, with the slogan 'Strength in optimism. Hope in progress.'](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/apda-ct-300x104.png "apda-ct - Avery Heights") --- ## **Dance for PD®** ### **Move with Joy, Music, and Confidence** Experience the power of music and movement through Dance for PD®, a nationally recognized program designed specifically for individuals living with Parkinson’s disease. Led by **Teaching Artist Amy Valente of Neighborhood Music School in New Haven**, classes incorporate movement, rhythm, creativity, and social engagement in a welcoming environment for all abilities. No dance experience is necessary. ### **Dance for PD® Can Help Improve** - Balance and stability - Flexibility and range of motion - Coordination and movement fluidity - Gait and walking patterns - Emotional well-being and confidence - Social connection and engagement Participants discover that movement can be enjoyable, empowering, and therapeutic while enjoying the benefits of music and community. **When:** Fourth Wednesday of every month | 11:00 AM – 12:00 PM **Where:** Adams Room, The Heights at Avery Heights **Cost:** Free and open to the public --- ### **More Than Exercise** The Parkinson’s in Motion Program extends beyond classes and support groups. Throughout the year, participants can enjoy: ### **Ask the Doctor Sessions** Meet with neurologists, specialists, and healthcare professionals to learn about symptom management, medications, treatment options, and strategies for living well with Parkinson’s. ### **Educational Presentations** Learn from experts in: - Nutrition - Acupuncture - Wellness and mindfulness - Energy healing and stress reduction - Sleep and cognitive health - Emerging Parkinson’s therapies and research ### **Social and Community Events** Because living well includes staying connected, we regularly host: - Social gatherings - Special events - Creative arts programs - Community celebrations - Opportunities to meet others facing similar challenges - Parkinson’s-focused book club featuring discussion, education, and connection through shared reading --- ## **Rehabilitative Services for Residents** Residents of The Heights have access to physical, occupational, and speech therapy services provided by licensed professionals in the comfort of their home. These specialized services help support: - Strength and mobility - Fall prevention - Daily living activities - Voice and communication challenges - Swallowing concerns - Overall independence and quality of life *Therapy services are provided at an additional cost and may be covered by Medicare or insurance, depending on eligibility.* --- ## **Join Us** Whether you’re living with Parkinson’s, caring for a loved one, or simply looking for resources and support, we invite you to experience the Parkinson’s in Motion Program at The Heights. **The Heights at Avery Heights** 550 Avery Heights Hartford, CT 06106 **For more information or to RSVP:** Siobhan Mattingly [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403 ## **Discover How You Can Stay Strong, Connected, and Independent** Join a community that understands the Parkinson’s journey and is committed to helping individuals thrive through movement, education, support, and meaningful connection. Together, we’re building strength, fostering hope, and empowering people to live well with Parkinson’s. #### Presented in Partnership With: ![The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/AVH_logoCHI_cmyk.svg "AVH_logoCHI_cmyk") ![apda-logo-506x130-1](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/apda-logo-506x130-1.png "apda-logo-506x130-1") ![Dance for PD](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/Dance-PD.jpg "DFPD_roundFINAL") ![PD In Motion Logo](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/PD-In-Motion-Exercise-Program-logo_.png "PD In Motion Exercise Program logo_") ![Abstract turquoise circle logo with white angular lines forming a stylized N shape.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/NMS.png "NMS") ![Rock Steady Boxing logo with blue and beige geometric ribbons and the slogan 'Fighting Back Against Parkinson's' below it.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/RSB-Logo-4c-wtag.webp "RSB-Logo-4c-wtag") --- ### [Day In The Life](https://averyheights.org/day-in-the-life-request/) **Published:** August 5, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Schedule Your Complimentary Day in the Life Experience ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png) **Don’t just take a tour-spend the day with us.** - Meet residents - Enjoy lunch - Join activities Experience the “welcoming lifestyle” that makes The Heights feel like home. ## day in the life ## Your Information **Tell us how to reach you and we’ll take care of the rest.** Name(Required) First Last Phone(Required) Email(Required) ## About You **Are you interested in:** Check all that apply. Independent Living Memory Care Assisted Living Exploring options for the future Helping a loved one find senior living Who are you planning for? Myself Parent Spouse Other ## Preferred Visit Date(s) Give us up to three options and we’ll confirm the one that works best. First Choice(Required) Second Choice Third Choice Preferred Day of the Week Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday ## Your Visit **Activities You’d Like to Experience** Fitness or Exercise Class Art Class Educational Programs Social Hour Religious or Spiritual Programs Aquatics / Pool Games & Cards Music or Entertainment Resident-Led Clubs Dining Experience Whatever is happening that day ### Lunch Preference Would you like to enjoy lunch with residents during your visit? Yes No ## Tell Us a Little More What interests you most about The Heights? What questions would you like answered during your visit? ### Mobility Considerations To help us make your visit comfortable: No mobility concerns Use a cane Use a walker Use a wheelchair Other Additional Comments Submit Δ ### Prefer to Schedule Directly? **Siobhan Mattingly** – Director of Marketing [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403 · --- ### [Contact Us](https://averyheights.org/contact/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Contact Avery Heights One place to ask a question, request information, or start a conversation with our team. Tell us what you’re interested in and we’ll route you to the right person. [ Send a message ](#contact-form) [ Schedule a tour ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min?month=2026-07) [ Get directions & map ](#directions) "\*" indicates required fields Request Information## How can we help? The search for senior living can feel overwhelming. Our team is here to guide you and your family — start below. First name\* Last Name\* What are you interested in?\*Select An Option…Independent Living — ApartmentsIndependent Living — CottagesAssisted LivingMemory CareShort-Term RehabilitationLong-Term CareHome Health CareSchedule a Tour / VisitCareers & EmploymentEvents, Giving & VolunteeringGeneral Question Your selection routes the inquiry to the right team member automatically — no need to hunt for the correct extension. Email\* Phone\* Message Submit Δ We’ll reply within one business day. Your information is never shared. ![Happy, hug and portrait of senior women in house with care, trust and support, relax and bonding wi.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/happy-hug-and-portrait-of-senior-women-in-house-w-2024-06-24-21-32-19-utc-scaled.jpg "happy-hug-and-portrait-of-senior-women-in-house-w-2024-06-24-21-32-19-utc") ### For more information Prefer to talk now? Call our team at [(860) 245-9629](tel:+18602459629). We look forward to answering your questions and guiding you on the road to residency. Schedule a Tour ### Experience The Heights in person Join us on campus and see first-hand what life is like at Avery Heights. Pick a time that works for you. [Book a Tour on Calendly](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min?month=2026-07) Or call to schedule: [(860) 245-9629](tel:+18602459629)Tours live on a dedicated “Schedule a Tour” page so the booking stays a separate, focused goal – the Calendly scheduler embeds directly on-site. Our Locations ## Contact Avery Heights Three locations, one campus. Reach the right building directly, or use the form above and we’ll connect you. #### The Heights [550 Avery Heights Hartford, CT 06106](#directions)[(860) 245-9629 x403](tel:+18602459629)[Get directions](#directions) #### Avery Heights Skilled Care [705 New Britain Ave Hartford, CT 06106](#directions)[(860) 245-9629 x433](tel:+18602459629)[Get directions](#directions) #### Avery Heights Home Healthcare [550 Avery Heights Hartford, CT 06106](#directions) [(860) 245-9629 x428](tel:+18602459629)[Get directions](#directions) Find Us ## Directions & Map 705 New Britain Avenue, Hartford, CT 06106 – near West Hartford and Newington. [Open in Google Maps](https://www.google.com/maps/search/?api=1&query=705+New+Britain+Ave,+Hartford,+CT+06106)#### Notices: [Title VI](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/20231128164457581.pdf "https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/20231128164457581.pdf")[ADA Service Requirements](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/Avery-Compliance-with-ADA-service-requirements.docx.pdf "https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/Avery-Compliance-with-ADA-service-requirements.docx.pdf") --- ### [Independent Living](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS FITNESS CENTER ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/ "WELLNESSFITNESS CENTER") ## [ WELLNESS POOL ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/ "WELLNESSPOOL") # Independent Living ![Avery Heights 30th anniversary logo - independent senior living Hartford CT](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/AVH22198-Avery-Heights-30th-logo-12-1.8.21-final.png "AVH22198-Avery-Heights-30th-+-logo-12-1.8.21-final") Independent Living: Our talented staff ensures that residents living in The Heights [apartments](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/apartments/) and [cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/) continue to live independently for years. Residents at The Heights know that “zest” is the ingredient that sets it apart from other senior living communities. For added peace of mind, you will have priority access to services, including [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) Services, [Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/), and Avery’s full continuum of care, which includes [home health care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/), [short-term rehab](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/), and [long-term skilled nursing care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/), should the need ever arise. You’ll be surprised by The Heights’ affordable rental options and our lack of buy-in or entrance fees. You simply sign a 12-month lease and pay your rent each month. Please visit us to discover senior living with the ideal balance of care, cost, and, most importantly, your quality of life. For more information or to schedule a tour, please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403. ## [Letter from our Director](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/letter-from-our-director/) [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/letter-from-our-director/) ## [Apartments](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/apartments/) Independent Apartments With Care [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/apartments/) ## [Cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/) Cottage Living, With All The Charm [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/) ## [Services and Amenities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/) Maintenance, Cooking, Housekeeping. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/) ## [Program and Activities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/) Make New Memories Today. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/) ## [Activity Calendar](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/activity-calendar/) Scan Our Upcoming Events! [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/activity-calendar/) ## [Wellness](https://averyheights.org/wellness/) Fitness Program Aims To Ensure Your Freedom. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/) ## [Dining](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/dining/) Delightful Dining At The Heights [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/dining/) ## [Support Groups](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/) Many Levels Of Support Are Available. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/) ## [The Villager](https://averyheights.org/shop/) Our Shop At The Heights. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/shop/) ## Picture Yourself Here From beautiful residences and chef-prepared dining to wellness programs and engaging activities, there’s so much to experience. Come see life at Avery Heights for yourself. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact) --- ### [Services and Amenities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/ "WELLNESS") ## [ PROGRAMS AND ACTIVITIES ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/ "PROGRAMS AND ACTIVITIES") # Services and Amenities ### Schedule a Tour Contact Us Today To Learn More [ Click to Schedule ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min)## Your Next Chapter Starts Here! With More Choices… Leave the home maintenance, cooking, housekeeping, and landscaping to our attentive staff, and spend your time as you choose! The possibilities are endless, with a full calendar of onsite events, activities, and even volunteer opportunities. Never a dull moment. **So, what will you do with your time? Your opportunities are as unlimited as your interests:** - Explore exciting new hobbies, such as painting, pool, or horticulture. - Soak in the natural beauty during a leisurely stroll on our walking trails. - Volunteer-Share your talents with the community through music, art, storytelling or lectures, or bring your pet for pet therapy (subject to prior approval) - Attend an Avery Actors performance or one of many other cultural performances. - Enroll in stimulating learning at the Trinity College Academy of *Lifelong Learning,* - Enjoy a day out experiencing the history of the area or playing a round of golf. ### Services for worry-free living **Services that enhance your day-to-day life** - Restaurant-style dining with carry-out options and customized diet menus - All interior and exterior building maintenance, lawn and grounds maintenance, and trash removal - Housekeeping services - Gym and heated pool - Diverse spiritual programming, including a variety of denominations, Bible studies, and chaplain services - Concierge services, including “handyman” services - Receptionist and security service 24 hours/7 days a week, and emergency response system. - On-site medical services - Transportation services to appointments, shopping, and entertainment - Registered dietitian available for consultation **Amenities for the best retirement experience** Avery Heights sets the standard for active independent living with many incredible amenities on campus. - Mail Room - Movie Theater - Library - [The Villager](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/the-villager/) - Beauty Salon and Barber Shop - Private meeting and Event rooms - Hospitality suites For more information, please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403 [ Fitness Center ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) [ Pool ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/) [ Dining ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/dining/) ## Discover Life at Avery Heights Tour our community, meet our residents, and experience the warmth, services, and amenities that make Avery Heights feel like home. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) --- ### [Wellness](https://averyheights.org/wellness/) **Published:** August 13, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ SERVICES AND AMENITIES PROGRAMS AND ACTIVITIES ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/ "SERVICES AND AMENITIESPROGRAMS AND ACTIVITIES") ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") # Wellness ## Discover the Benefits of Wellness for Your Life Our Reaching New Heights fitness program is designed with your independence and well-being in mind. It features the cutting-edge Marjorie B. Doty Aquatic Center, a fully equipped fitness center, and a beautiful half-mile scenic walking trail. We provide the tools and support to help you stay active, healthy, and thriving. ## [Aquatic Center](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/) Enjoy Our Aquatic Center [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/) ## [The Fitness Center](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) Staffed Fitness Center [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) ## [Walking Trails](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/) The Beauty Of Nature [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/) ## [Support Groups](https://averyheights.org/wellness/support-groups/) We Are Here To Help [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/support-groups/) ## [Spiritual Care](https://averyheights.org/wellness/spiritual-care/) Explore Your Spirituality [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/spiritual-care/) ## [PD In Motion](https://averyheights.org/wellness/pd-in-motion/) Programs for Parkinsons [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/pd-in-motion/) ## Let’s Find the Right Fit Together Every situation is unique. During your visit, we’ll learn about your needs, answer your questions, and help you explore the options that best fit your lifestyle. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact) --- ### [Cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** - ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/5-Your-Next-Chapter-Starts-Here-scaled.jpg) # Cottages ### Schedule a Tour Contact Us Today To Learn More [ Click to Schedule ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min)## Cottage Living: All the Charm Without the Hassle Our caring staff works hard to ensure you won’t have to worry about maintaining your one- or two-bedroom cottage. Instead, you can focus on preparing your [dinner](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/dining/) or [exercising](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/health-and-wellness/) your green thumb in your garden. These cottages are designed in a classic New England style and include a completely equipped kitchen, full bath(s), spacious living room, and yard. Bringing Lifestyle Home - Rental only – no buy-in or entry fee - In unit Washer/dryer or access to campus laundry facilities - Trash and snow removal - Exterior maintenance - Small pets allowed (please inquire) - Assigned parking space near your cottage At Your Doorstep - Access to our gracious dining room and bright fire place lounge - Scheduled van transportation to off-campus destinations and events - Priority access to the full continuum of healthcare, including Assisted Living, short-term rehabilitation, long-term care, and Memory Care For more information, please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403 ## Picture Yourself Here From beautiful residences and chef-prepared dining to wellness programs and engaging activities, there’s so much to experience. Come see life at Avery Heights for yourself. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) --- ### [Apartments](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/apartments/) **Published:** January 6, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** - ![Modern fully equipped kitchen in senior living apartment at Avery Heights Hartford CT](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Kitchen.jpg) # Apartments ### Schedule a Tour Contact Us Today To Learn More [ Click to Schedule ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min)## Live Independently. Live Fully. Our airy, spacious, and comfortable one- and two-bedroom apartments come with a fully equipped kitchen, washer/dryer, large living room, private bathroom(s), balcony or patio, cable TV service, and phone hookups. You can lead an independent, worry-free lifestyle knowing our professional staff is available 24/7 to provide additional peace of mind that assistance is there when it’s needed. Here are a few of the advantages we provide to our apartment residents: Bringing Lifestyle Home - Rental only – no buy-in or entry fee - Small pets allowed (please inquire) - Four-course meals in our gracious dining room - Continental and hot delicious breakfast - Housekeeping and weekly linen change - 24-hour monitored emergency system - Parking space in the connected, covered garage At Your Doorstep - Scheduled van transportation to off-campus destinations and events - Priority access to the full continuum of health care services, including Assisted Living, short-term rehabilitation, long-term care, and Memory Care For more information or to schedule a tour, please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403. ## Picture Yourself Here From beautiful residences and chef-prepared dining to wellness programs and engaging activities, there’s so much to experience. Come see life at Avery Heights for yourself. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) --- ### [Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ HEALTH SERVICES ASSISTED LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/ "HEALTH SERVICESASSISTED LIVING") ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") # Memory Care at The Heights ### Schedule a Tour Contact Us Today To Learn More [ Click to Schedule ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min)## Memory Care at the Burnham Family Residence The Burnham Family Residence provides top-tier assisted living memory care in a secure, engaging, and compassionate environment. Designed for residents with Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia, our community offers: - A beautiful outdoor space - Daily activities and outings - Personalized, 24/7 support from highly trained staff Our innovative care program enhances residents’ physical, emotional, and cognitive well-being, offering the stimulation and encouragement needed to preserve cognitive strength and promote independence. ## A Leader in Memory Care Innovation Memory Care Director Holly Taylor-Fry incorporates evidence-based methods to enhance mental acuity and improve quality of life. Holly is certified in Positive Approach to Care, a person-centered program developed by dementia care expert Teepa Snow. ## Cutting-Edge Engagement with IN2L Technology Our use of the IN2L (It’s Never Too Late) system provides wellness-focused digital content that supports: - Reduced reliance on medication - Improved social engagement and elevated moods - Enhanced quality of life and reduced anxiety ## Discover the Burnham Family Difference Learn more about our innovative approach to memory care. Contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 to schedule a tour and see how we provide compassionate, expert care in a warm and supportive environment. ## Testimonial ##### Speaking for my siblings and myself, our hearts know Mom is where she should be. We feel so Blessed that we chose Avery Heights for mom. “Whenever my 8 siblings or I ask our 93-year-old mother how she is doing, she always responds with “I am wonderful! They treat me so nicely here. My every need is met.” What more would anyone want to hear from their mother? We all feel so blessed to have Mom in her home at Avery Heights. Mom entered Avery on January 15th, 2015. We knew this was a special place that felt like home from the moment we entered. Currently, my mother is living happily in the Burnham Memory Care unit. Before COVID hit, I visited her several times a week. Burnham has such a home-like feel. It is bright and cheery. The nursing staff couldn’t be any nicer. All of the aides are welcoming and treat each resident of the Burnham family with kindness and respect. They work very hard to make it pleasant. Her meals are incredible; we have never heard her complain about the food. The cleaning staff keeps the entire area spotless! They know the residents and do their jobs with a smile. Holly, the Director of Memory Care, loves her work, which is evident every day she is there. She keeps Mom and the others “on their toes” with fun games, quizzes, sing-a-longs, and crafts. Andrew, Holly’s assistant, has been such a joy to Mom. He and Holly would FaceTime or call us weekly during the quarantine lockdown. This reassured us that all was well and kept us connected. We appreciate how much time, effort, and love the staff puts into caring for Mom. We thank Tanairi, who greets us at the front desk every time we visit, Basha and the facilities workers, who have organized all of the moves for Mom, Corrie, who has spent numerous hours running the entertainment. Theresa in the Villager shop is so helpful in finding just the right items for Mom, and Rose does Mom’s hair and makes her look and feel beautiful. Finally, we would like to express our gratitude to Bill Englehart, the outstanding “Captain” of Avery Heights! He has always been available to answer our questions. He knows and enjoys all of the “passengers” at this wonderful place. Speaking for my siblings and myself, our hearts know Mom is where she should be. We feel so Blessed that we chose Avery Heights for mom.” ## Considering Senior Living? Whether you’re planning ahead or exploring options for a loved one, we’re here to help. Schedule a tour and get your questions answered in a relaxed, no-pressure setting. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) --- ### [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/ "WELLNESS") ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") # Assisted Living ### Schedule a Tour Contact Us Today To Learn More [ Click to Schedule ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min)## The Perfect Balance of Assistance and Independence at The Heights The Heights Assisted Living apartments offer comfort, convenience, and 24-hour security to give residents the support they need while maintaining their independence. Our experienced staff provides personalized assistance with daily tasks in a safe and welcoming environment. ## A Connected Community Assisted Living apartments offer private one- and two-bedroom options with access to care as needed. Residents enjoy both privacy and the reassurance of having a dedicated Personal Care Assistant available at all times. Services can be tailored to evolving needs, providing flexibility and peace of mind. ### Comprehensive Care and Personalized Support - Our compassionate staff ensures residents receive: - Assistance with bathing, grooming, dressing, and toileting - Weekly personal laundry and light housekeeping - Help with meal preparation and snacks - 24-hour security and regular comfort checks - Comprehensive medication management and reminders - Weekly nursing visits and monthly health assessments - Escorts to medical appointments or errands - Three daily meals, with dining room escorts or in-room delivery - Additional housekeeping and laundry services as needed ### Seamless Access to Healthcare Services Residents benefit from priority access to Avery’s full continuum of care, including: - Assisted Living - Memory Care - Intermediate care at Noble Residence - Skilled nursing care - Short-term inpatient rehabilitation - Outpatient rehabilitation services - Home healthcare ## Schedule a Visit Experience the warmth and support of The Heights for yourself! To learn more or schedule a personal tour with a complimentary lunch or dinner, contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 ## Considering Senior Living? Whether you’re planning ahead or exploring options for a loved one, we’re here to help. Schedule a tour and get your questions answered in a relaxed, no-pressure setting. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) --- ### [Testimonials](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/testimonials/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Testimonials I have been a resident since 2016 and am very pleased with the avery community – especially the stage! I have received immediate response to any of my questions and find a very professional attitude permeates this beautiful campus. I would recommend Avery Heights to all caring families. H. Schweitzer Avery Heights is a terrific place. My mom has been a resident for 3½ years. The staff is outstanding, and the service has been exceptional. Each person living here is treated with respect, and attention is carefully given on an individual basis. As a physician, I have spent many hours in retirement homes and nursing homes, and it doesn’t get any better than Avery Heights. C. Dickens M.D. Our parents moved here a few years ago. The staff is incredibly supportive, and helpful. Activities are plentiful and entertaining. We could not be Happier for our folks! They loved it from the moment they moved here, and my bonus dad continues to utilize many resources here. E. Graber I Thank God every day for Avery Heights and I have lived here for 7 Years. C. Couture **A wonderful home for us!** My husband has moderate Alzheimer’s Disease. Two plus years ago, it became apparent that we needed to move from our home. We found a lovely cottage on the grounds of Avery Heights. There is a memory care section, so when he needs it, we are already here! J. Palmer I love Avery Heights; I am busy every day. The activities are many & enjoyable, The food is delicious and plentiful. The staff are friendly and supportive. As a non-profit, the costs are reasonable. G. Schoppert Cottager It’s been great living here for 7 years. Lots to do and participate in. My dog enjoys it too. A. Weaver Avery Heights has the most important features of assisted living-a warm and caring staff, Lovely accommodations, and lots to do-making it as good as it gets! V. Naugler All residents are encouraged to participate in as many of the daily activities as they wish. Friends can join existing programs or even start new ones if they are interested. Common areas such as the theater, game room, or library are great places to meet friends and have fun. L. Knewson I have been very happy in this apartment (3 years), and it has an excellent layout. I was especially pleased with the positive staff attitude, the extensive and lovely campus, and the fact that it is very walkable with paths and trails. B. Bellivean ## Come See the Difference The best way to experience The Heights at Avery Heights is with a personal tour. Explore our residences, meet our team, and discover what makes our community feel like home. [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/contact/) --- ### [Make A Difference](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** - ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_1498-scaled.jpg) # Make A Difference Avery Heights is a thriving not-for-profit community. Your time and support help it reach even further. For more than 60 years, Avery Heights has been more than a place to live. Residents here run committees, plan events, and welcome the wider community to free programs like Rock Steady Boxing and our Parkinson’s support group. None of that depends on charity. All of it grows with support. Because we are a not-for-profit, every gift goes back into the community: life enrichment, programs open to all of Greater Hartford, support for the veterans who call Avery Heights home, and the spaces neighbors share. Whether you volunteer an afternoon, sponsor the Golf Classic, or give directly, you become part of what makes this community worth belonging to. ## [Volunteer](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/volunteer/) Join Our Engaged Group Of Volunteers. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/volunteer/) ## [Golf Classic](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/golf-classic/) Join Us For Our 2026 Golf Classic [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/golf-classic/) ## [Veterans](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/supporting-veterans/) We Honor And Support Our Veterans. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/supporting-veterans/) --- ### [Schedule a Tour The Heights](https://averyheights.org/schedule-a-tour-the-heights/) **Published:** July 27, 2026 **Author:** avery heights **Content:** ## [ OUR COMMUNITY LIFESTYLE ](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/ "OUR COMMUNITYLIFESTYLE") ## [ OUR COMMUNITY ](https://averyheights.org/our-community/ "OUR COMMUNITY") # Schedule a Tour ![About Avery Heights - Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/ILnew.jpg "ILnew - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights") At Avery Heights, we understand that choosing the right senior living or healthcare community is one of life’s most important decisions. The best way to determine if our community is the right fit is to experience it firsthand. We’re here to help not sure which option is right for you or your loved one? Reach out to either member of our team and we’ll help connect you with the appropriate resource. Call [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. We look forward to welcoming you to Avery Heights and helping you discover the care, support, and lifestyle options that make our community so special. ## **Senior Living Community Tours** ## Independent Living • Assisted Living • Memory Care Experience everything The Heights at Avery Heights has to offer. During your visit, you’ll have the opportunity to: - Tour our residences and community spaces - Learn about lifestyle, dining, wellness, and activities - Meet team members and residents - Discuss floor plans, pricing, and services - Explore future planning options for yourself or a loved one ### Schedule Online Use the calendar below to select a date and time that works best for you. Simply choose an available appointment, complete the form, and you’ll receive confirmation of your visit. ### Prefer to Schedule Directly? Contact: Siobhan Mattingly Director of Marketing [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), Ext. 403 --- ### [Contact Page Option A](https://averyheights.org/contact-page-option-a/) **Published:** July 23, 2026 **Author:** avery heights **Content:** # Contact Avery Heights One place to ask a question, request information, or start a conversation with our team. Tell us what you’re interested in and we’ll route you to the right person. [ Send a message ](#contact-form) [ Schedule a tour ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min?month=2026-07) [ Get directions & map ](#directions) "\*" indicates required fields Request Information## How can we help? The search for senior living can feel overwhelming. Our team is here to guide you and your family — start below. First name\* Last Name\* What are you interested in?\*Select An Option…Independent Living — ApartmentsIndependent Living — CottagesAssisted LivingMemory CareShort-Term RehabilitationLong-Term CareHome Health CareSchedule a Tour / VisitCareers & EmploymentEvents, Giving & VolunteeringGeneral Question Your selection routes the inquiry to the right team member automatically — no need to hunt for the correct extension. Email\* Phone\* Message Submit Δ We’ll reply within one business day. Your information is never shared. ![Happy, hug and portrait of senior women in house with care, trust and support, relax and bonding wi.](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/happy-hug-and-portrait-of-senior-women-in-house-w-2024-06-24-21-32-19-utc-scaled.jpg "happy-hug-and-portrait-of-senior-women-in-house-w-2024-06-24-21-32-19-utc") ### For more information Prefer to talk now? Call our team at [(860) 245-9629](tel:+18602459629). We look forward to answering your questions and guiding you on the road to residency. Schedule a Tour ### Experience The Heights in person Join us on campus and see first-hand what life is like at Avery Heights. Pick a time that works for you. [Book a Tour on Calendly](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min?month=2026-07) Or call to schedule: [(860) 245-9629](tel:+18602459629)Tours live on a dedicated “Schedule a Tour” page so the booking stays a separate, focused goal – the Calendly scheduler embeds directly on-site. Our Locations ## Contact Avery Heights Three locations, one campus. Reach the right building directly, or use the form above and we’ll connect you. #### The Heights [550 Avery Heights Hartford, CT 06106](#directions)[(860) 245-9629 x403](tel:+18602459629)[Get directions](#directions) #### Avery Heights Skilled Care [705 New Britain Ave Hartford, CT 06106](#directions)[(860) 245-9629 x433](tel:+18602459629)[Get directions](#directions) #### Avery Heights Home Healthcare [550 Avery Heights Hartford, CT 06106](#directions) [(860) 245-9629 x428](tel:+18602459629)[Get directions](#directions) Find Us ## Directions & Map 705 New Britain Avenue, Hartford, CT 06106 – near West Hartford and Newington. [Open in Google Maps](https://www.google.com/maps/search/?api=1&query=705+New+Britain+Ave,+Hartford,+CT+06106) --- ### [Podcasts](https://averyheights.org/podcasts/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Siobhan-UpdtHeader](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Siobhan-UpdtHeader.jpg "Siobhan-UpdtHeader") # Podcasts Our podcasts provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and more, host Siobhan Mattingly will help guide you as you begin Your Next Chapter. # Featured Podcasts Search for:#### CATEGORIES - [All Episodes 50](#) - [Senior Living & Transitions 26](#) - [Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's 13](#) - [Healthy Aging & Wellness 15](#) - [Financial & Legal Planning 16](#) - [Purpose, Inspiration & Positive Aging 11](#) - [Research & Innovation in Aging 1](#) ## Filter By Tag [Alzheimer's](#)[Dementia](#)[Memory Care](#)[Parkinson's Disease](#)[Caregiving](#)[Medicaid](#)[Veteran Benefits](#)[Long-Term Care Insurance](#)[Brain Health](#)[Healthy Aging](#)[Senior Living](#)[Independent Living](#)[Assisted Living](#)[Moving & Downsizing](#)[Financial Planning](#)[Purpose & Meaning](#)[Wellness](#)[Aging Life Care Professionals](#) # About Siobhan ![Siobhan Mattingly](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Siobhan.jpg-300x300.webp)Siobhan Mattingly shows older adults how to start their next chapter. She is a senior living community consultant for The Heights at Avery Heights. She has a 15+ years career in senior living resources which includes, home care, hospice, and senior living communities. Her passion is helping older adults find their passion and purpose and live their journey to the fullest. Be sure to listen to the podcast episodes and do not be afraid to reach out to Siobhan at . Ready and willing to be of service for sure… --- ### [Schedule a Tour](https://averyheights.org/schedule-a-tour/) **Published:** July 15, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ OUR COMMUNITY LIFESTYLE ](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/ "OUR COMMUNITYLIFESTYLE") ## [ OUR COMMUNITY ](https://averyheights.org/our-community/ "OUR COMMUNITY") # Schedule a Tour ![About Avery Heights - Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/ILnew.jpg "ILnew - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights - Avery Heights") At Avery Heights, we understand that choosing the right senior living or healthcare community is one of life’s most important decisions. The best way to determine if our community is the right fit is to experience it firsthand. We’re here to help not sure which option is right for you or your loved one? Reach out to either member of our team and we’ll help connect you with the appropriate resource. Call [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. We look forward to welcoming you to Avery Heights and helping you discover the care, support, and lifestyle options that make our community so special. ## **Which Type of Visit Would You Like to Schedule?** ## **Senior Living Community Tours** ### Independent Living • Assisted Living • Memory Care Experience everything The Heights at Avery Heights has to offer. During your visit, you’ll have the opportunity to: - Tour our residences and community spaces - Learn about lifestyle, dining, wellness, and activities - Meet team members and residents - Discuss floor plans, pricing, and services - Explore future planning options for yourself or a loved one ### Schedule Online Use the calendar below to select a date and time that works best for you. Simply choose an available appointment, complete the form, and you’ll receive confirmation of your visit. ### Prefer to Schedule Directly? Contact: Siobhan Mattingly Director of Marketing [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), Ext. 403 ## **Healthcare Center Tours** ### Short-Term Rehabilitation • Long-Term Care • Skilled Nursing Care If you are seeking information about our Healthcare Center, including skilled nursing, long-term care, or short-term rehabilitation services, we would be happy to connect you with our admissions team. To schedule a visit or discuss healthcare options, please contact: Isabella Kerlegza Director of Admissions & Marketing [860-906-3108](tel:+18609063108) Isabella can answer questions about rehabilitation services, skilled nursing care, long-term care placement, admissions, insurance coverage, and the transition process. Not sure which option is right for you or your loved one? Reach out to either member of our team and we’ll help connect you with the appropriate resource. We look forward to welcoming you to Avery Heights and helping you discover the care, support, and lifestyle options that make our community so special. --- ### [FAQ](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/faq/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # FAQ Welcome to the Avery Heights FAQ page! We understand that choosing the right location is vital for you and your loved ones. To help you navigate this journey, we’ve compiled answers to some of the most common questions about our Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC). Whether you’re curious about our services, amenities, ownership, or daily life at Avery Heights, our comprehensive FAQs cover most of what you need to know. From rehabilitation and skilled nursing care to pet policies and recreational activities, find the information you need to make an informed choice. If you have additional questions or are ready to take the next step, please reach out through our contact form below. #### What is a Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC)? A CCRC is a continuing care retirement community that offers a variety of housing and care options for older adults, including independent living, assisted living, and skilled nursing, all on one campus. A CCRC meets residents’ social, physical, and financial needs by providing services to accommodate every stage of life. A CCRC typically provides other services such as dining, housekeeping, scheduled transportation, home maintenance, security, and recreational and social activities. #### What are the benefits of choosing a Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC)? There are many benefits to choosing a CCRC, including: - **Peace of mind**: CCRCs offer a priority plan for the future, which can help reduce worries. - **Tailored care**: CCRCs offer a continuum of care that can adjust to changing health needs, including assisted living, memory care, skilled nursing, and rehabilitation. - **Maintenance-free lifestyle**: CCRCs provide services like cooking, cleaning, house, and yard work. - **Social environment**: CCRCs offer a vibrant social environment with amenities like dining options, fitness centers, and social activities. - **Wellness**: CCRCs focus on the “whole person” concept, including emotional, spiritual, mental, and social wellness. - **Dining**: CCRCs usually offer a dining room with meals up to three times daily. #### What makes Avery Heights model different in the CCRC arena? What makes the Avery Heights model different in the CCRC arena? It is essential to mention the Avery Heights difference. Unlike most nationwide CCRC models, Avery Heights is a rental-only community, so residents do not have to pay entrance fees or negotiate contracts. And Avery Heights has **no buy-in fee**: The Heights at Avery Heights doesn’t charge a buy-in fee, unlike many other senior living communities. Avery Heights’ other great features and amenities are noted below. - **A full continuum of care**: A range of care options, including assisted living, memory care, home health care, short-term rehabilitation, and skilled nursing care. - **Affordable**: Affordable rental options. - **Fitness center:** A fitness center with modern equipment and personalized exercise plans. - **Activities:** A variety of activities, including stretching classes, trivia games, arts and crafts, and a game room. - **Dining:** On-site dining options, including a private dining room - **Transportation**: Complimentary transportation. #### Who owns and operates Avery Heights? Church Homes, Inc. owns and operates Avery Heights, a retirement community and healthcare facility in Hartford, Connecticut. Church Homes, Inc. is a not-for-profit organization that provides high-quality healthcare and residential living services while helping seniors maintain their independence. #### Is Avery Heights nondenominational? Yes, Avery Heights is considered nondenominational and nonsectarian. It is a retirement community that welcomes people of all faiths and provides spiritual support to residents from various denominations. #### Is Avery Heights conveniently located? Yes, Avery Heights is conveniently situated in Connecticut’s capital city, providing easy access to the arts, dining, and entertainment, as well as the vibrant Newington and West Hartford Center area. It’s a great location for residents who want to be near resources and amenities while living in a senior community. #### Do you offer rehabilitation? Avery Heights offers short-term residential rehabilitation for those who need nursing and supportive care while recovering from an illness or surgery. The Avery Home Health agency provides pre- and post-operative therapy services as well as appointments for community members wishing to enhance mobility, balance, or move with greater ease and comfort. Our cottage, independent, Assisted Living, and Memory Care options have priority access to these services. #### Do you offer 24-hour skilled nursing? We do! Avery Heights is dedicated to those residents who require 24-hour nursing care. Avery’s highly skilled professional nursing team works in tandem with the medical director. Our cottage, independent, Assisted Living, and Memory Care options have priority access to these services. #### Do you allow pets? Yes, pets are welcome at The Heights in our cottages and apartments. #### Are there Spiritual programs? Yes, the spiritual well-being of each resident, while an individual choice, is vitally important at Avery Heights. We have an active chaplain who is a source of leadership and inspiration through services, counseling, and Bible study groups. We also have services for most denominations and holidays such as Hanukkah and Christmas. #### Can I bring my vehicle and what parking is available? Yes, residents licensed to drive by the state of Connecticut can bring their automobiles. All residential units provide either street or garage parking. #### Is smoking permitted? We are a smoke-free campus. Smoking is not permitted. #### Will my loved one have access to transportation for doctor’s visits, shopping, and external community activities? Yes! We also offer shopping trips and bank trips for our Heights and Cottage residents. #### What type of recreational activities are there? Seven days a week, members of the Avery Heights community can count on a variety of activities and programs to meet their social, physical, emotional, cognitive, and spiritual needs. Among the many engaging options are music and art classes, book clubs, restaurant dining, outings to area cultural attractions, exercise classes, educational programs, evening socials, movie nights, and more. Our Life Enrichment Director meets regularly with residents and family members to develop schedules for optimal recreational opportunities and quality of life. #### What are my dining options? Various meal plans are included on all levels. Cottagers may make reservations to e Enjoy meals in The Heights dining room or meals may also be ordered for pick up. #### Are there hospitals in the area? Yes, there are many award-winning hospitals in the area. including UConn, and Hospital for Special Care. #### What happens if my health needs change? In addition to offering independent living residences, Avery Heights has assisted living, memory support, skilled care, and long-term care options. All residents on campus have priority to our higher levels of care. Fees are based on the level of care. #### Where do I start? Please fill out this [**FORM**](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/) to schedule a tour and learn more about our community! ## PD In Motion #### What is PD In Motion? PD In Motion is a comprehensive Parkinson’s wellness program offered by The Heights at Avery Heights that helps individuals living with Parkinson’s disease stay active, informed, connected, and empowered. Through specialized exercise classes, support groups, educational programs, social events, and access to resources, PD In Motion is designed to support physical, emotional, and social well-being while helping participants maintain independence and quality of life. [Learn More](https://averyheights.org/wellness/pd-in-motion/). #### Who can participate in PD In Motion? PD In Motion is open to individuals living with Parkinson’s disease at any stage, as well as care partners, family members, and friends seeking education, support, and connection. #### Do I need to be a resident of The Heights at Avery Heights to attend? No. Most PD In Motion programs are open to the community and welcome anyone affected by Parkinson’s disease. #### Is there a cost to participate? Most PD In Motion programs and events are offered free of charge. #### Do I need experience with boxing or dancing? Not at all. Rock Steady Boxing® and Dance for PD® are designed specifically for people living with Parkinson’s. No previous experience is required. #### Can my spouse, caregiver, or family member attend with me? Yes. Care partners and family members are encouraged to participate in support groups, educational programs, and many community events. #### How do I get started? Simply contact our team to learn about upcoming events, class schedules, and opportunities to connect with others living with Parkinson’s. Siobhan Mattingly – or [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. --- ### [Supporting Veterans](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/supporting-veterans/) **Published:** July 13, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ MAKING A DIFFERENCE VOLUNTEER ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/volunteer/ "MAKING A DIFFERENCEVOLUNTEER") ## [ MAKING A DIFFERENCE GOLF TOURNAMENT ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/golf-classic/ "MAKING A DIFFERENCEGOLF TOURNAMENT") # Supporting Veterans Service and Sacrifice at Avery Heights ## **Honoring Veterans Every Day at The Heights at Avery Heights** At The Heights at Avery Heights, veterans are not just residents-they are an important part of our community. More than 40 veterans have chosen to make The Heights their home, creating a welcoming environment built on shared experiences, service, friendship, and mutual support. We believe honoring our veterans means more than celebrating on special occasions. It means recognizing their service every day through meaningful programs, community connections, and tangible benefits that show our gratitude. --- ## **Our Commitment to Veterans** As a thank you for your service, we proudly offer: **New Resident – Veteran Appreciation Savings** **$500 Monthly Rent Discount for Veterans** **$250 Monthly Rent Discount for Surviving Spouses** These exclusive savings are part of our ongoing commitment to supporting those who have served our country and the families who stood beside them.\* --- ## **A Community of Camaraderie and Connection** Veterans often tell us that one of the greatest benefits of living at The Heights is the opportunity to connect with others who understand their experiences. Residents enjoy: - Veteran recognition ceremonies - Guest speakers and educational programs - Patriotic celebrations and special events - Opportunities to share stories and build friendships - Volunteer and leadership opportunities within the community --- ## **Veteran Support and Resources** Our team can help connect veterans and their families with valuable resources, benefits, and support services. Whether you’re exploring senior living options or already receiving VA benefits, we’re here to help guide you through the process. --- ## **Why Veterans Choose The Heights** - Community of 40+ veteran residents - Monthly rent savings for veterans and surviving spouses - Veteran-focused programs and events - Opportunities for fellowship and service - Full continuum of care on one campus - Welcoming and supportive environment --- ## **Join Our Veteran Community** Your service deserves to be recognized and appreciated every day. Discover why so many veterans and their families have chosen The Heights at Avery Heights as their home. Contact us today to learn more about our Veteran Appreciation Savings, upcoming veteran events, and available residences. Siobhan Mattingly at or [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. **The Heights at Avery Heights** **Where Service Is Honored. Community Is Strong. And Veterans Belong.** \*Please inquire with The Heights representative for details on this offering. Rules and restrictions do apply. Want more information? [Contact Us Here](/contact/request-information/). --- ### [Golf Classic](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/golf-classic-offseason/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Swing for a Cause at Avery Heights… The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is not just an event-it’s a celebration of community spirit, resilience, and support. By participating, you’re helping us sustain our mission to provide exceptional care and dignified living for seniors, making a tangible difference in countless lives. We look forward to welcoming you to the green and sharing a day of joy, laughter, and impact. For more information, please contact [Doreen Baldoni](mailto:dbaldoni@churchhomes.org) at [860-527-9126](tel:+18605279126), ext. 362, or fill out the form on this page. See you there! ![Save the date 2026](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/save-the-date-2026.jpg) We hope you will join us next year! ![2026 Avery Heights Golf Classic](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/2026-Golf-Tourney-751x1024.png) ## Golf Tournament – More Information URL This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. 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By participating, you’re helping us sustain our mission to provide exceptional care and dignified living for seniors, making a tangible difference in countless lives. We look forward to welcoming you to the green and sharing a day of joy, laughter, and impact. For more information, please contact Doreen Baldoni at [860-527-9126](tel:+18605279126), ext. 362, or fill out the form on this page. See you there! ## **Experience the Legacy of Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic** The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is more than just a day on the greens-it’s a celebration of community, camaraderie, and a shared commitment to supporting a vital mission. This annual event, held on Wednesday, September 24, 2025, at the picturesque Tunxis Plantation Country Club in Farmington, CT, invites you to be part of something bigger. For over 65 years, Avery Heights has been a beacon of compassionate care and dignified living for seniors. By participating in this golf classic, you’re contributing to a legacy that’s helped countless individuals live their best lives. Whether you’re a seasoned golfer or new to the sport, this is an opportunity to make a difference while enjoying a beautiful day outdoors. ## **Your Day at the Golf Classic** **Wake up to an exciting schedule!** The Avery Heights Golf Classic promises a day filled with fun, friendly competition, and fantastic memories. The day kicks off with registration at 10 a.m. followed by a shotgun start at 11 a.m. Players will enjoy lunch on the course, ensuring you stay energized for the various contests and challenges throughout the day. After the final putt, join us for cocktails and dinner where the celebrations continue. **Get ready for some friendly competition!** The tournament follows a scramble format, perfect for golfers of all skill levels. Participate in contests including Low Gross and Low Net for foursomes, a Putting Contest, Longest Drive, Hole-in-One challenge, and Closest-to-Pin. Plus, don’t miss out on the raffle and silent auction, where exciting prizes await! ## **Sponsorship Tiers and Benefits** Supporting Avery Heights through sponsorship not only amplifies our mission but also shines a light on your brand. We offer several sponsorship tiers to suit various levels of involvement, each providing unique benefits and recognition. - **The Platinum ($10,000)** – Includes 4 golfers, custom tee sponsor signage, a full-page ad in the tournament program, and pre-and post-event banner signage in the reception/dinner area. - **The Gold ($5,000)** – Includes 4 golfers, custom tee sponsor signage, a half-page ad in the tournament program, and recognition. - **The Silver ($2,500)** – Includes 4 golfers, custom tee sponsor signage, a quarter-page ad in the tournament program, and recognition. - **The Corporate ($1,000)** – Includes 2 golfers and tournament program recognition. By choosing a sponsorship tier, you’re directly impacting the lives of those at Avery Heights while gaining visibility among a dedicated community. ## **How to Participate in the Golf Classic** Joining the Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is simple, with options to suit everyone: - **Individual Golfers ($200)** – Sign up and enjoy a full day of golf, food, and festivities. - **Non-Sponsorship Foursomes ($800)** – Gather friends or colleagues for a memorable group experience, complete with lunch and dinner. - **Hole Sponsors ($250)** – Support the cause by sponsoring a hole, perfect for local businesses and individuals eager to contribute. Register now to secure your spot and be part of this impactful day. Simply reply by September 11, 2025, to ensure your place on the green. ## **A Warm Invitation to Our Community** We’re especially thrilled to welcome veterans, senior citizens, and all members of the local community to participate. Avery Heights values the rich diversity and spirit of our community, and this event is a wonderful opportunity to connect, celebrate, and support one another. Whether you’re swinging a club or cheering from the sidelines, your presence makes all the difference. Let’s come together to honor tradition, enjoy some friendly competition, and bolster our collective mission. ## **Reflections from Past Events** Looking back, the Avery Heights Golf Classic has always been about more than the game. It’s about creating lasting memories and forging friendships that extend beyond the fairways. Past participants have shared heartfelt testimonials, highlighting not only the enjoyment of the day but also the profound impact of supporting a meaningful cause. These stories underscore the importance of community and the joy that comes from giving back. ## **Wrapping Up the Details** Before we hit the links, here are a few reminders to help you prepare for the Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic: - **Date & Time:** **Wednesday, September 24, 2025**, with registration at 10 a.m. and a shotgun start at 11 a.m. - **Location:** Tunxis Plantation Country Club, 87 Town Farm Rd, Farmington, CT 06032. - **Deadline:** Ensure your participation by replying by **September 11, 2025**. Your involvement supports a legacy of compassionate care and enhances the quality of life for our residents. Together, let’s make this year’s golf classic an unparalleled success! For directions, take I-84 to Exit 39, continue straight on Route 4, pass through Farmington Center, and over the Farmington River. Turn right at the light for Town Farm Road, and you’ll find the club on the left. ## **Join Us and Make a Difference** The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is not just an event-it’s a celebration of community spirit, resilience, and support. By participating, you’re helping us sustain our mission to provide exceptional care and dignified living for seniors, making a tangible difference in countless lives. We look forward to welcoming you to the green and sharing a day of joy, laughter, and impact. See you there! Make A Donation **Please consider making a donation to Avery Heights.** To make a donation, please email Doreen: Doreen Baldoni Your entry may be tax-deductible. Call for more information. ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/2025-Golf-Tourney-1-1127x1536.png) ## The message has been sent. Thanks for your interest in our Golf Classic. All registration fees are final and non-refundable. Individual golfers will be grouped as foursomes. For further information, please contact Doreen Baldoni at [**(860) 527-9126**](tel:+18605279126), ext. 362 --- ### [Our History](https://averyheights.org/about-us/our-history/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Our History ## Church Homes, Inc.: Pioneer in Retirement Villages since 1957 ![History, Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Avery-Height-Sign.jpg)As early as the late 1940s and mid-1950s, a group of Connecticut churches discussed how to provide dignified and respectful living accommodations for men and women like themselves — persons who had worked all their lives and were neither poor nor wealthy — who now faced retirement. Finally, in late 1957, an idea took shape. The Christian Activities Council of the Congregational Churches of Connecticut took the lead. A not-for-profit and nondenominational corporation was chartered, a board of directors was elected, and [Church Homes, Inc.](https://www.churchhomes.org/) was born. Seed money from five Hartford-area churches (South, Center, Asylum Hill, Immanuel of Hartford, and First Church of West Hartford) marked the beginning of this organization, which has continued to grow through generous gifts and bequests. **Providing Assisted & Independent Living Services** The transformation of Avery Heights from a convalescent hospital to a continuing care complex for the retired did not occur in one fell swoop. It was a concept that evolved over 10 years as the interrelated needs of the older adults were recognized and acted on. It took imagination and daring, a willingness to venture into unknown areas of social service, as well as a large dose of faith. The ability to provide a complete range of living options in a village setting — from complete independence to intensive 24-hour-a-day nursing care — is the concept behind the retirement communities of Avery Heights, nationally recognized for pioneering a progressive living concept for more than 65 years. Avery Heights has grown into one of the largest independent, not-for-profit, and nondenominational facilities for the older adults in [New England](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_England). Today, Avery Heights focuses on assisting each individual so that the latter years of life are spent as meaningfully as possible, with independence, dignity, and choice. --- ### [Golf Classic](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/golf-classic/) **Published:** May 2, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Swing for a Cause **2026 Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic Wednesday, October 7, 2026** **Tunxis Plantation Country Club in Farmington, CT** The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is not just an event-it’s a celebration of community spirit, resilience, and support. By participating, you’re helping us sustain our mission to provide exceptional care and dignified living for seniors, making a tangible difference in countless lives. We look forward to welcoming you to the green and sharing a day of joy, laughter, and impact. For more information, please contact Doreen Baldoni at [860-527-9126](tel:+18605279126), ext. 362, or fill out the form on this page. See you there! ## **Experience the Legacy of Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic** The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is more than just a day on the greens-it’s a celebration of community, camaraderie, and a shared commitment to supporting a vital mission. This annual event, held on Wednesday, October 7, 2026, at the picturesque Tunxis Plantation Country Club in Farmington, CT, invites you to be part of something bigger. For over 65 years, Avery Heights has been a beacon of compassionate care and dignified living for seniors. By participating in this golf classic, you’re contributing to a legacy that’s helped countless individuals live their best lives. Whether you’re a seasoned golfer or new to the sport, this is an opportunity to make a difference while enjoying a beautiful day outdoors. ## **Your Day at the Golf Classic** **Wake up to an exciting schedule!** The Avery Heights Golf Classic promises a day filled with fun, friendly competition, and fantastic memories. The day kicks off with registration at 10 a.m. followed by a shotgun start at 11 a.m. Players will enjoy lunch on the course, ensuring you stay energized for the various contests and challenges throughout the day. After the final putt, join us for cocktails and dinner, where the celebrations continue. **Get ready for some friendly competition!** The tournament follows a scramble format, perfect for golfers of all skill levels. Participate in contests including Low Gross and Low Net for foursomes, a Putting Contest, Longest Drive, Hole-in-One challenge, and Closest-to-Pin. Plus, don’t miss out on the raffle and silent auction, where exciting prizes await! ## **Sponsorship Tiers and Benefits** Supporting Avery Heights through sponsorship not only amplifies our mission but also shines a light on your brand. We offer several sponsorship tiers to suit various levels of involvement, each providing unique benefits and recognition. ### The Platinum – $10,000** - **4 golfers** - **Custom Tee Sponsor Signage** - **Tournament Program Ad (full page) and Recognition** - **Pre- and Post-Event Banner Signage in Reception/Dinner area** ### **The Gold – $5,000** - **4 golfers** - **Custom Tee Sponsor Signage** - **Tournament Program Ad (half-page) Recognition** ### **The Silver – $2,500** - **4 golfers** - **Custom Tee Sponsor Signage** - **Tournament Program Ad (1/4 page) Recognition** ### The Corporate – $1,000** - **2 golfers** - **Tournament Program Recognition** ### Hole Sponsorships Available for $250 per hole** By choosing a sponsorship tier, you’re directly impacting the lives of those at Avery Heights while gaining visibility among a dedicated community. ## **How to Participate in the Golf Classic** Joining the Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is simple, with options to suit everyone: - - **Individual Golfers ($200)** – Sign up and enjoy a full day of golf, food, and festivities. Register now to secure your spot and be part of this impactful day. Simply reply by September 24, 2026, to ensure your place on the green. ## **A Warm Invitation to Our Community** We’re especially thrilled to welcome veterans, senior citizens, and all members of the local community to participate. Avery Heights values the rich diversity and spirit of our community, and this event is a wonderful opportunity to connect, celebrate, and support one another. Whether you’re swinging a club or cheering from the sidelines, your presence makes all the difference. Let’s come together to honor tradition, enjoy some friendly competition, and bolster our collective mission. ## **Reflections from Past Events** Looking back, the Avery Heights Golf Classic has always been about more than the game. It’s about creating lasting memories and forging friendships that extend beyond the fairways. Past participants have shared heartfelt testimonials, highlighting not only the enjoyment of the day but also the profound impact of supporting a meaningful cause. These stories underscore the importance of community and the joy that comes from giving back. ## **Wrapping Up the Details** Before we hit the links, here are a few reminders to help you prepare for the Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic: - **Date & Time:** **Wednesday, October 7, 2026**, with registration at 10 a.m. and a shotgun start at 11 a.m. - **Location:** Tunxis Plantation Country Club, 87 Town Farm Rd, Farmington, CT 06032. - **Deadline:** Ensure your participation by replying by **September 24, 2026**. Your involvement supports a legacy of compassionate care and enhances the quality of life for our residents. Together, let’s make this year’s golf classic an unparalleled success! For directions, take I-84 to Exit 39, continue straight on Route 4, pass through Farmington Center, and over the Farmington River. Turn right at the light for Town Farm Road, and you’ll find the club on the left. ## **Join Us and Make a Difference** The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is not just an event-it’s a celebration of community spirit, resilience, and support. By participating, you’re helping us sustain our mission to provide exceptional care and dignified living for seniors, making a tangible difference in countless lives. We look forward to welcoming you to the green and sharing a day of joy, laughter, and impact. See you there! Make A Donation **Please consider making a donation to Avery Heights.** To make a donation, please email Doreen: Doreen Baldoni Your entry may be tax-deductible. Call for more information. ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/2026-Golf-Tourney-751x1024.png "2026-Golf-Tourney - Avery Heights") ## Golf Tournament X/Twitter This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. 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Individual golfers will be grouped as foursomes. For further information, please contact Doreen Baldoni at [**(860) 527-9126**](tel:+18605279126), ext. 362 --- ### [Our Community](https://averyheights.org/our-community/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** - ![Avery Heights independent living campus in Hartford Connecticut](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/ILnew.jpg) # Our Community ## Caring for you through the years Avery Heights-creating memories with loved ones and their families since 1957 For over 65 years, our staff has gained a solid reputation for providing seamless care and convenient living-all at a great value. We understand that taking the first step to living in a senior living community can be difficult, so we want to ensure that the transition to Avery Heights is easy. As a rental-only community, you won’t have to deal with the extra burden of paying entrance fees, and we have a moving coordinator on call who can help you with the move-in process. Avery Heights is a not-for-profit organization that offers a full continuum of care-including Assisted Living Memory Care-as well as distinctive offerings like 24-hour security, therapy seven days a week, and dental services. Avery Heights is owned and operated by Church Homes, Inc., a not-for-profit, nonsectarian corporation committed to providing the finest in residential living and healthcare services while helping you maintain the highest levels of independence. We are multi-denominational and committed to providing spiritual support to persons of all faiths. ## [Lifestyle](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/) Make Each Day An Adventure [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/) ## [Community Map](https://averyheights.org/our-community/community-map/) Learn More About Our Campus [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/our-community/community-map/) ## [Wellness](https://averyheights.org/wellness/) Discover The Parts Of Our Fitness Program [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/) --- ### [Our Location](https://averyheights.org/our-location/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") ## [ OUR LOCATION GREATER HARTFORD AREA ](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/ "OUR LOCATIONGREATER HARTFORD AREA") # Our Location Avery Heights is perfectly situated for a senior living experience unlike any other. The area is steeped in history, art, fine dining, and shopping-all within a minute’s drive. With so much to enjoy and so close to home, your next chapter will be amazing. To learn more about our community, please click here to contact us or call [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201). ## [Hartford Area](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/) Culture And Excitement Of Greater Hartford. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/) ## [Local Attractions](https://averyheights.org/our-location/local-attractions/) Amenities Steps Away From Your Front Door [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/our-location/local-attractions/) ## [Schedule a Visit](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min) Use Our Calendly Link To Book A Tour Today. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://calendly.com/theheightsct/60min) ## [Events](https://averyheights.org/our-location/events/) Check Our Monthly Events Calendar [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/our-location/events/) --- ### [Join our Community](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/) **Published:** August 13, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ JOIN OUR COMMUNITY TALKING TO YOUR LOVED ONE ](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/talking-to-your-loved-one/ "JOIN OUR COMMUNITYTALKING TO YOUR LOVED ONE") ## [ OUR COMMUNITY ](https://averyheights.org/our-community/ "OUR COMMUNITY") # Join our Community Finding the right retirement community is like turning the page to a new chapter in life. It’s not just about comfortable living-it’s about thriving and writing the next part of your story with vigor and zest. More than 65 years, Avery Heights has been the go-to choice for individuals seeking exceptional retirement living and healthcare services. With a commitment to personal independence and a blend of modern amenities, Avery Heights stands out as a premier destination for seniors keen on redefining aging. ## [FAQ](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/faq/) Frequently Asked Questions. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/faq/) ## [Talking To Your Loved One](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/talking-to-your-loved-one/) Time To Discuss Moving to Senior Living. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/talking-to-your-loved-one/) ## [Testimonials](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/testimonials/) Hear What Our Residents Are Saying. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/testimonials/) --- ### [Local Attractions](https://averyheights.org/our-location/local-attractions/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING SERVICES AND AMENITIES ](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/ "INDEPENDENT LIVINGSERVICES AND AMENITIES") # Local Attractions ## Your Next Chapter: Fun, Entertainment and Endless Possibilities At Avery Heights, adventure and enrichment are just steps from your door. Whether you’re looking to explore history, enjoy live entertainment, or stay active, Greater Hartford offers countless opportunities to create memories with family and friends. ## Exciting Experiences Await - Cultural and Historical Landmarks – Visit the Mark Twain House, Harriet Beecher Stowe House, Connecticut Science Museum, Wadsworth Atheneum, The Amistad Center, the Noah Webster Museum, and Elizabeth Park - Lifelong Learning at Trinity College – Engage in classes, sporting events, and live performances at the Austin Arts Center and Cinestudio - For When Family Visits – Take the grandkids to Lake Compounce or Brownstone Adventure Sports Park - Outdoor Adventures – Hike, fish, or kayak at nearby parks - Top-Tier Performing Arts – Enjoy shows at Bushnell Theater, Hartford Stage, TheaterWorks, and Park Road Playhouse - Incredible Live Music – Experience concerts at Infinity Music Hall, Hartford Symphony Orchestra, and the Greater Hartford Jazz Festival - Exciting dining & shopping – Plus wineries, breweries, and a vibrant food scene - Premier golf courses – Access to both private and public courses - Convenient travel – Close to airports, hotels, and major interstates ## Endless Entertainment Just Outside Your Door At Avery Heights, you’ll find fun, excitement, and lifelong learning within reach. Discover more today! ## Discover More Start your next chapter at Avery Heights and experience the best of Greater Hartford. Contact us today at [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) to learn more! [ Find Out More ](https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attractions-g33804-Activities-oa0-Hartford_Connecticut.html) --- ### [Talking to Your Loved One](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/talking-to-your-loved-one/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ OUR COMMUNITY ](https://averyheights.org/our-community/ "OUR COMMUNITY") ## [ GETTING STARTED ](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/ "GETTING STARTED") # Talking to Your Loved One ## Helping a senior parent overcome resistance to relocating requires empathy, understanding, and patience. ### Here are some strategies you can use to support your loved one through this challenging transition: 1. **Listen to Their Concerns**: Take the time to listen to your loved one’s concerns and fears about relocating. Validate their feelings and acknowledge the difficulty of the situation. 2. **Provide Information**: Offer information about the benefits of relocating to a senior care community, such as access to care, socialization opportunities, and safety. Address any misconceptions or fears they may have about moving. 3. **Involve Them in the Decision-Making Process**: Empower your loved one to participate actively in the decision-making process. Please include them in discussing potential senior care options and consider their preferences and priorities. 4. **Address Practical Concerns**: Address any practical concerns your loved one may have about relocating, such as finances, healthcare needs, and logistical considerations. Offer solutions and support to help alleviate their worries. 5. **Highlight the Positives**: Highlight the positive aspects of relocating, such as the opportunity to meet new people, engage in meaningful activities, and receive personalized care and support. 6. **Offer Emotional Support**: Be patient and understanding with your loved one as they navigate their feelings about relocating. Offer emotional support and reassurance throughout the process. 7. **Encourage Small Steps**: Encourage your loved one to take small steps toward relocating, such as visiting potential senior care communities or speaking with healthcare professionals. Breaking the process down into manageable steps can help reduce feelings of overwhelm. 8. **Seek Professional Help if Needed**: If your loved one resists relocating, consider seeking professional help from a therapist, counselor, or geriatric care manager. A trained professional can provide guidance and support tailored to your loved one’s needs. 9. **Respect Their Autonomy**: Respect your loved one’s autonomy and decisions regarding their living situation. While you may have their best interests at heart, it’s important to honor their wishes and choices as much as possible. By approaching the situation with empathy, understanding, and patience, you can help your senior loved one overcome relocation resistance and navigate this transition more easily. For more information, please call [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201) or email . --- ### [About Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/about-us/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ OUR COMMUNITY LIFESTYLE ](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/ "OUR COMMUNITYLIFESTYLE") ## [ OUR COMMUNITY ](https://averyheights.org/our-community/ "OUR COMMUNITY") # About Avery Heights, Where Your Next Chapter Begins ![About Avery Heights - Assisted Living Facility](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/ILnew.jpg) About Avery Heights: It is no surprise that Avery Heights has been the area’s first choice in retirement living for over half a century. Over the years, we have kept pace with the desires, needs, and ever-changing approaches to the notion of aging well. The Avery Heights campus gives residents priority access to a full range of healthcare services, with no buy-in fee. - [Cottages](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/cottages/) - [Assisted Living services](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) - [Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) - [Home Health Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/) - [Short-term Rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/) - [Skilled Nursing Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) Our Campus, Avery Heights, is a continuing care retirement community located on a secure campus bordering the towns of West Hartford and Newington. Residents and their families can enjoy a wealth of nearby [activities and attractions](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/), including shopping, dining, cultural activities, and scenic parks. Come join us and start your next chapter. As a not-for-profit organization owned and operated by Church Homes, Inc., Avery Heights is committed to providing the finest in [residential living](https://averyheights.org/our-community/) and healthcare services so seniors can maintain the highest level of independence possible. **This mission is to:** - Promote and implement systems that maintain and support every individual’s optimal independence and life wishes in a safe, dignified atmosphere conducive to quality retirement. - Assure knowledgeable and consistent leadership in retirement living, [long-term care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/), [home care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/), and support services. - Develop innovative programs and services that respond to the changing needs of its residents, clients, and the society it serves. ## [Vision and Mission](https://averyheights.org/about-us/vision-and-mission/) A Tradition of Service. A Future of Possibility. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/vision-and-mission/) ## [Our History](https://averyheights.org/about-us/our-history/) We Are The Area’s Top Choice In Senior Living. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/our-history/) ## [Leadership / Staff](https://averyheights.org/about-us/the-heights-leadership-and-staff/) Our Senior Living Community Personnel. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/the-heights-leadership-and-staff/) ## [Partnerships](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiiliations-and-partnerships/) Partnerships To Bring You The Best Care. [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiiliations-and-partnerships/) --- ### [The Heights Leadership and Staff](https://averyheights.org/about-us/the-heights-leadership-and-staff/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Leadership and Staff Meet the inspiring leaders and dedicated staff who drive Avery Heights forward. Our leadership team is committed to upholding our mission of creating a dynamic and inclusive community, while our skilled staff ensures the smooth operation of our programs and services. We work collaboratively to cultivate an environment where residents, and partners can achieve their fullest potential. Learn more about the individuals who make Avery Heights a great place to live, work, and grow. ![Bill Englehart Director The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Englehart-Bill-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0752-1638x2048.jpg.webp "Englehart-Bill-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0752-1638x2048.jpg") **Bill Englehart** Director The Heights ![Michael Latina](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Latina-Michael-Avery-Heights-Headshots-scaled.jpg "Latina-Michael-Avery Heights Headshots") **Michael Latina** Administrator Avery Heights ![Tim Barber Director of Dining Services The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Barber-Tim-Avery-Heights-Headshots-2-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0625-scaled.jpg.webp "Barber-Tim-Avery-Heights-Headshots-2-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0625-scaled.jpg") **Tim Barber** Director of Dining Services The Heights ![Siobhan Mattingly Director of Marketing The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Ceferalli-Siobhan-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-2207-scaled.jpg.webp "Ceferalli-Siobhan-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-2207-scaled.jpg") **Siobhan Mattingly** Director of Marketing The Heights ![Isabella Pereira Director of Admissions/MarketingAvery Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Avery-Heights-November-2024-AZVphotomedia.com-7110DSC_7110.jpg "Avery Heights November 2024 AZVphotomedia.com-7110DSC_7110") **Isabella Pereira** Director of Admissions/Marketing Avery Heights ![Basha Crooks Director of Housekeeping and Hospitality The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Crooks-Basha-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-2159-1638x2048.jpg.webp "Crooks-Basha-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-2159-1638x2048.jpg") **Basha Crooks** Director of Housekeeping and Hospitality The Heights ![Holly Taylor-Fry Memory Care Director The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Taylor-Fry-Holly-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0650-scaled.jpg.webp "Taylor-Fry-Holly-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0650-scaled.jpg") **Holly Taylor-Fry** Memory Care Director The Heights ![Theresa Guerin Life Enrichment DirectorThe Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Guerin-TeresaP4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0598-2_pp_pp-scaled.jpg.webp "Guerin-TeresaP4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0598-2_pp_pp-scaled.jpg") **Theresa Guerin** Life Enrichment Director The Heights ![Roseanne Holland Resident Services Coordinator The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Holland-Roseanne-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0724-1638x2048.jpg.webp "Holland-Roseanne-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0724-1638x2048.jpg") **Roseanne Holland** Resident Services Coordinator The Heights ![Mark Modifica Wellness Center Director](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Modifica-Mark-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0762-scaled.jpg.webp "Modifica-Mark-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0762-scaled.jpg") **Mark Modifica** Wellness Center Director ![Marsha Crawford Concierge The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Crawford-Marsha-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0677-scaled.jpg.webp "Crawford-Marsha-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0677-scaled.jpg") **Marsha Crawford** Concierge The Heights ![Tanairy Martinez Concierge The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Martinez-Tanairy-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0728-1638x2048.jpg.webp "Martinez-Tanairy-4-Avery-Heights-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0728-1638x2048.jpg") **Tanairy Martinez** Concierge The Heights ![Arnadella Shaw-Anderson Dining Room Manager The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Shaw-Anderson-Arnadella-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-Arnadella-Shaw-Anderson-2128-1638x2048.jpg.webp "Shaw-Anderson-Arnadella-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-Arnadella-Shaw-Anderson-2128-1638x2048.jpg") **Arnadella Shaw-Anderson** Dining Room Manager The Heights --- ### [Giving](https://averyheights.org/giving/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ MAKING A DIFFERENCE VOLUNTEER ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/volunteer/ "MAKING A DIFFERENCEVOLUNTEER") ## [ MAKING A DIFFERENCE GOLF TOURNAMENT ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/golf-classic/ "MAKING A DIFFERENCEGOLF TOURNAMENT") # Giving Avery Heights is a not-for-profit continuing care retirement community. We are committed to delivering compassionate, personalized care in a warm and friendly environment. When you give to Avery Heights, you change lives with your gift. Your gift can help us fulfill our mission of caring for seniors and the employees who care for them. We are a 501(c)(3) organization that makes your donation tax-deductible to the extent allowed by law. Your generosity will make a difference, and we are extremely grateful for all donations. If you would like to make a donation, you can make your check payable to Avery Heights. **Checks can be mailed to:** Avery Heights Doreen Baldoni 217 Avery Heights Hartford, CT 06106-4200 \*Please add “Donation” in the memo line of your check. If you have questions regarding donations, please call [Doreen Baldoni](mailto:dbaldoni@churchhomes.org) at [860-906-3152](tel:+18609063152). --- ### [Health Services](https://averyheights.org/health-services/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ HEALTH SERVICES SHORT-TERM REHAB ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/ "HEALTH SERVICESSHORT-TERM REHAB") ## [ HEALTH SERVICES LONG-TERM CARE ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/program-and-activities/ "HEALTH SERVICESLONG-TERM CARE") # Health Services As a full-service Continuing Care Retirement Community, Avery Heights provides a full continuum of on-site high-quality senior healthcare. In addition to our senior living community, you’ll also have priority access to higher levels of care. **To learn more about our community, please click [here](https://averyheights.org/contact/) to contact us or call [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201).** ## [Letter from our Administrator](https://averyheights.org/health-services/letter-from-our-administrator/) [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/letter-from-our-administrator/) ## [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) A Blend Of Assistance And Individuality [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/) ## [Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) Award Winning Memory Care [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/) ## [Home Health Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/) Discover The Impact Of Home Care [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/) ## [Short-Term Rehab](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/) Short-Term Rehab: Journey To Recovery [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/) ## [Long-Term Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) Compassionate Long-Term Care [ ![Avery Heights senior living Hartford CT icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) --- ### [CT-APDA](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/ct-apda/) **Published:** December 23, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # CT-APDA ## Understanding Parkinson’s Disease Care at The Heights in Partnership with the American Parkinson Disease Association Connecticut Chapter ![CT-APDA](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/CT-APDA-support-group-300x103.png)Parkinson’s disease (PD) can be an overwhelming diagnosis, not just for individuals but also for their families. Managing the symptoms while maintaining dignity, quality of life, and independence takes a collective effort, expert care, and a robust support system. This is why partnerships like the one between The Heights and the American [Parkinson Disease Association Connecticut](https://www.apdaparkinson.org) Chapter (CT-APDA) play such a pivotal role. Together, they are working tirelessly to provide comprehensive support for residents impacted by Parkinson’s, offering innovative programs, services, and education. Whether you or a loved one is living with Parkinson’s disease and seeking an assisted living facility, it’s natural to have questions about the level of care, support systems, and available resources. Below, we’ve addressed some common inquiries to help you better understand how The Heights, in collaboration with the [CT-APDA](https://www.apdaparkinson.org), provides the specialized care that individuals with PD need. While there is currently no cure for Parkinson’s, treatments and lifestyle adjustments can help manage symptoms effectively. For residents of assisted living facilities like The Heights, having access to specialized care and programs makes a world of difference in slowing the progression of their condition and enhancing their quality of life. ### How Does the American Parkinson’s Disease Association Connecticut Chapter Support Residents? The CT-APDA is a key player in promoting hope and optimism for people with Parkinson’s disease through its innovative services, educational outreach, and inspiring community programs. Their mission aligns perfectly with The Heights’ commitment to providing compassionate and personalized care. Through this collaboration, residents not only benefit from tailored care plans but also engage in a range of activities and services designed to address the unique challenges of Parkinson’s. Monthly [support groups](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/) and PD Boxing classes are just two examples of the many initiatives aimed at empowering residents to maintain mobility, reduce stress, and stay actively involved in their care. ### What Specialized Programs Are Offered for Individuals with Parkinson’s Disease? Working alongside the CT-APDA, the Heights provides several programs designed to improve the well-being and functionality of individuals with Parkinson’s. ### Support Groups Being part of a supportive community is a powerful way to combat the emotional toll of Parkinson’s disease. Monthly support groups organized by The Heights and CT-APDA create a safe space for individuals and families to share experiences, receive encouragement, and discuss practical challenges. ### Rock Steady Boxing Research shows that exercise can help improve mobility and reduce the severity of Parkinson’s symptoms. The Rock Steady Boxing program combines fitness and fun, offering participants a creative way to build strength, coordination, and balance. The non-contact boxing format is safe yet highly effective for managing symptoms. ### Dance for PD® Parkinson Dance, often referred to as Dance for Parkinson’s, is a therapeutic program designed to help individuals with Parkinson’s disease improve their physical and emotional well-being through dance. This innovative approach combines elements of ballet, modern dance, and other movement styles to enhance balance, coordination, and flexibility. Participants engage in structured dance classes that are tailored to their abilities, allowing them to experience the joy of movement while also addressing specific symptoms of Parkinson’s, such as rigidity and tremors. Research has shown that dancing can boost brain activity, improve mobility, and foster social connections, making it a valuable tool in managing the disease. ### Educational Workshops Knowledge is empowering. Through informational sessions facilitated by the CT-APDA, residents and families gain valuable insights into living with Parkinson’s. From medication management tips to nutritional guidance and coping strategies, these workshops ensure that individuals are equipped with the tools they need. ### Tailored Wellness Plans At The Heights, each resident receives a personalized care plan that reflects their specific needs and health goals. These plans often integrate activities such as physical therapy, [speech therapy](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/), or occupational therapy, all tailored for [Parkinson’s](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkinson's_disease) care. ### How Does The Heights Create a Supportive Environment for Individuals with Parkinson’s? Living with Parkinson’s disease requires more than medical care-it requires a reassuring and understanding environment that addresses physical, emotional, and social needs. The Heights achieves this by fostering a close-knit community where residents feel secure, respected, and understood. Daily routines are structured to balance predictability (important for reducing stress in those with Parkinson’s) with opportunities for socializing and exploration. Staff receive ongoing training on the latest advancements in Parkinson’s care, ensuring that residents have access to compassionate and cutting-edge support. Integration with the Connecticut chapter of the American Parkinson’s Disease Association further reinforces this supportive framework. Thanks to this partnership, The Heights can provide residents with unparalleled access to the latest research, resources, and support networks tailored specifically for those with Parkinson’s. ### How Can Families Stay Involved in the Care Process? The Heights firmly believes that families are an integral part of the care team. From the moment a loved one enters the community, family members are encouraged to participate in decision-making, care planning, and specific activities. Monthly support groups are also available, equipping families with the knowledge and emotional support they need to assist their loved ones effectively. Open communication ensures that families stay informed about their loved one’s progress so they feel confident in the care being provided. ### Why Choose The Heights for Parkinson’s Care? When it comes to managing Parkinson’s disease, choosing the right assisted living facility can make a significant difference in the quality of life for both residents and their families. Here’s what sets The Heights apart: ### Collaborative Partnership with CT-APDA This unique partnership brings unparalleled expertise, resources, and community support to residents living with Parkinson’s. ### Comprehensive Programs From support groups to innovative exercise programs like PD boxing, residents have access to a variety of services tailored to Parkinson’s care. ### Personalized Attention Every resident receives care tailored to their unique needs, preferences, and health goals. ### Dedicated Staff The team’s ongoing training ensures they stay updated on best practices for Parkinson’s care. ### Sense of Community Residents join a welcoming and vibrant community that encourages connection and participation at every stage. ### How Can I Learn More or Get Involved? For families, caregivers, and individuals interested in learning more about Parkinson’s care at The Heights, the team is always here to answer your questions. Whether you’re curious about the programs in partnership with CT-APDA, the admission process, or the day-to-day life of residents, feel free to reach out for more information. Parkinson’s disease is a challenge, but with the right support, resources, and care, individuals can lead fulfilling and enriching lives. Together, The Heights and the American Parkinson Disease Association Connecticut Chapter are making this possible-one resident at a time. Are you interested in learning more? Please contact us today to schedule a visit and see the difference for yourself! Contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. --- ### [Home](https://averyheights.org/home/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [The Heights Family Council](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/the-heights-family-council/) **Published:** May 5, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # The Heights Family Council At The Heights, the **Family and Friends Council** plays a vital role in ensuring the well-being and happiness of our residents. Comprised of dedicated family members, friends, and caregivers, the council serves as a supportive network and a powerful advocate for our residents’ needs and interests. What we do: 1. **Advocacy**: We collaborate with the community’s administration to address any concerns and work towards enhancing the quality of life for all residents. 2. **Support**: We provide a platform for family members and friends to share their experiences, offer advice, and support each other. We welcome all family members and friends of our residents to join the council and contribute to our mission of creating a vibrant and caring community. For more information about The Heights committees and councils that support our residents and their loved ones [ Heights Family Council Sign Up ](https://forms.gle/TX8rN3ghoWKdjJJbA) [ Heights Family Council Suggestion Form ](https://forms.gle/feMPj3gjTuetNTvB7)The Heights is always working to build a stronger, more connected community! # The Heights Family Council At The Heights, the **Family and Friends Council** plays a vital role in ensuring the well-being and happiness of our residents. Comprised of dedicated family members, friends, and caregivers, the council serves as a supportive network and a powerful advocate for our residents’ needs and interests. What we do: 1. **Advocacy**: We collaborate with the community’s administration to address any concerns and work towards enhancing the quality of life for all residents. 2. **Support**: We provide a platform for family members and friends to share their experiences, offer advice, and support each other. We welcome all family members and friends of our residents to join the council and contribute to our mission of creating a vibrant and caring community. For more information about The Heights committees and councils that support our residents and their loved ones [ Heights Family Council Sign Up ](https://forms.gle/TX8rN3ghoWKdjJJbA) [ Heights Family Council Suggestion Form ](https://forms.gle/feMPj3gjTuetNTvB7)The Heights is always working to build a stronger, more connected community! --- ### [Amston Home Transition Solutions](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/transition-services/) **Published:** December 23, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Amston Home Transition Solutions ## Navigating the Transition to The Heights ![Amston Home Transition Solutions](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Amston.jpg)Making the move to a senior living community is a major milestone, one filled with emotions, logistics, and important decisions. For older adults and their families, it can feel overwhelming. However, with the right guidance and support, this transition can be a smooth and exciting chapter in life. At The Heights, we’ve partnered with Amston Home Transition Solutions, an expert team ready to help make this process as seamless as possible. Together, we support our new residents and their families every step of the way. Are you considering transitioning to a senior living community for yourself or a loved one? You’re not alone. Many people have questions about how to manage this change, and we’re here to answer some of the most common ones to guide you through this process. ### What Does the Transition Process Look Like? The transition to a senior living community can be broken into manageable steps. With the help of The Heights and Amston Home Transition Solutions, what might seem like a daunting task becomes a smooth and well-coordinated process. - Planning: Before the move, Amston helps families assess their loved one’s needs and lays out a plan to ease the transition. This includes determining which belongings to bring, selling or downsizing a home, and creating a timeline for the move. - Packing: Packing can feel like an overwhelming task, but Amston’s team is here to help. They efficiently handle packing while ensuring that sentimental and essential items are treated with care. - Moving Day: A move can be physically and emotionally taxing, but Amston takes care of the heavy lifting. From transporting belongings to setting up the new living space, they handle it all to make residents feel at home from day one. - Settling In: The Heights community welcomes new residents with open arms. From the moment they arrive, residents start forming connections with neighbors and staff while exploring their new community. ### Won’t the Move Be Overwhelming for My Loved One? The idea of downsizing a home and adjusting to a new environment can understandably feel overwhelming. That’s why Amston offers more than just practical help-they provide emotional support, too. Their “unlimited hand-holding” approach ensures your loved one doesn’t feel rushed or pressured. They’ll have the time and space to process their emotions, making the transition feel less daunting. By working closely with our residents, they help eliminate the stress and sleepless nights often associated with such a big life change. Instead, they provide confidence and clarity as individuals step into this new chapter. ### Take the First Step Today Transitioning to a senior living community is a meaningful step toward a brighter, more comfortable future. At The Heights, we believe in making this transition as effortless and exciting as possible for both residents and their families. To learn more about our partnership and Transition Solutions, please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. Start planning for a stress-free move and a brand-new chapter filled with opportunity and community. Your loved one’s next page is waiting to be written-let’s turn it together. --- ### [Podiatry Care](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/podiatrist/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Podiatry Services ## Understanding Podiatry in a Senior Living Community Podiatry plays an essential role in maintaining overall health, especially for seniors. At The Heights, residents have the convenience of professional podiatry services delivered directly to their doorstep, courtesy of Dr. Jeffrey Tencer, DPM. Visiting twice per month, Dr. Tencer offers specialized foot care that caters to individual needs. But what exactly is podiatry, and why is it so crucial for older adults? ### What Is Podiatry?![Podiatry](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Podiatry-Logo-300x300.png) Podiatry is a branch of medicine that focuses on diagnosing, treating, and preventing conditions affecting the feet, ankles, and lower extremities. These areas are integral to mobility and balance, which are especially vital for older adults. With age, foot-related issues can become more common-conditions like arthritis, diabetes complications, bunions, and fungal infections can greatly impact quality of life. Having access to on-site podiatry services ensures these problems are addressed effectively. ### Why Is Podiatry Important for Seniors? As people age, the likelihood of developing chronic conditions that can affect the feet increases. Without proper care, minor issues can quickly escalate into something more serious, potentially leading to limited mobility, pain, or even severe infections. Here’s why podiatry is particularly critical for seniors: - **Chronic Illness Management** Conditions like diabetes or arthritis often come with complications that affect foot health. For example, diabetes can cause nerve damage (neuropathy) and poor circulation, increasing the risk of foot ulcers or infections. Regular podiatry visits help monitor and treat such complications early. - **Mobility and Independence** Painful foot conditions can limit movement, making seniors more dependent on others for daily activities. Podiatrists play a major role in enhancing mobility by providing treatments that alleviate pain and discomfort. - **Fall Prevention** Falls are a common concern in assisted living communities, with foot and ankle issues sometimes contributing to a lack of balance. By addressing these conditions, podiatry care helps minimize fall risks. ### What Services Are Typically Offered by Podiatrists? Podiatrists offer a range of services tailored to the needs of each individual. At The Heights, Dr. Jeffrey Tencer provides comprehensive care, which may include: - Nail and skin care, including the treatment of fungal infections, warts, and calluses. - Monitoring and treating conditions like bunions, corns, and hammertoes. - Diabetic foot exams to check for nerve damage, circulation issues, and any signs of wounds or infections. - Custom orthotics for improved support and balance. - Treatments for arthritis-related pain and mobility challenges. Each service aims to ensure comfort and long-term foot health, enabling residents to maintain their quality of life. ### How Often Does Dr. Tencer Visit? For residents’ convenience, Dr. Jeffrey Tencer visits The Heights twice a month. This regular schedule ensures that residents receive timely care without the need to leave the comfort of their community. Whether addressing immediate concerns or providing routine check-ups, having a consistent schedule allows for more personalized and proactive treatment plans. ### Do Residents Need to Schedule Appointments? Yes, appointments are required to ensure each resident receives the attention they deserve. The Heights staff is available to help residents schedule visits and share any specific concerns they may have with Dr. Tencer in advance. ### What Should Residents Expect from Their Podiatry Appointment? A typical podiatry appointment usually begins with an evaluation of the resident’s current foot health. Dr. Tencer will look for any signs of abnormalities, ask about pain or discomfort, and discuss any pre-existing conditions that may impact foot care. Based on this assessment, he will suggest appropriate treatments, recommend preventive steps, or provide education to maintain foot health between visits. For example, residents with diabetes can expect regular screenings for any signs of ulcers, cuts, or infections. Those experiencing discomfort when walking may receive orthotics or specific recommendations to help improve their mobility and alleviate pain. ### What Are the Benefits of On-Site Podiatry Care? One of the standout benefits is convenience. On-site podiatry services eliminate the need for travel, which can be challenging for many seniors. Everything is taken care of within the community, which means residents can prioritize health without added stress. Furthermore, it fosters a sense of security, knowing expert care is always accessible. Another major advantage is consistent care. With Dr. Tencer visiting twice a month, any issues that arise can be dealt with promptly. This reduces the chance of small problems turning into larger, more serious medical concerns. ### How Can The Heights Support Podiatry Care? At The Heights, staff members play a key role in helping residents access podiatry care. From scheduling appointments to assisting with mobility and providing relevant medical history to Dr. Tencer, the team ensures that residents are fully supported before, during, and after their appointments. Additionally, staff can help monitor foot health in between visits by noticing signs of swelling, discolored nails, or other changes. Early detection is vital, and the collaboration between staff and Dr. Tencer forms a strong foundation for proactive care. ### A Community Approach to Health At The Heights, podiatry is just one part of a larger commitment to resident wellness. By offering on-site visits from experienced professionals like Dr. Jeffrey Tencer, we aim to provide holistic care tailored to each individual’s unique needs. Through consistent care, education, and early intervention, podiatry services help residents live more independently, comfortably, and confidently. ### Do You Want to Know More? If you have questions about podiatry at The Heights, we are here to support your health, one step at a time. Please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. --- ### [WORSHIP NIGHT](https://averyheights.org/worship-night/) **Published:** July 15, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## HEART MOVEMENT ## **This event has passed Thank you for your interest** --- ### [WORSHIP NIGHT OCT 2025](https://averyheights.org/worship-night-oct-2025/) **Published:** September 24, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## HEART MOVEMENT ## **This event has passed Thank you for your interest** --- ### [Ask the Doctor with Dr. Duarte Machado](https://averyheights.org/ask-the-doctor-with-dr-duarte-machado/) **Published:** July 15, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Ask the Doctor with Dr. Duarte Machado Wednesday, October 29, 2025 4pm – 6pm Speaker: Duarte Machado, MD Hartford Healthcare Dept of Neurology Ayer Neuroscience Institute Chase Family Movement Disorders Center Join us to have the opportunity to ask questions related to Parkinson’s symptoms, medications, and more! Learn how you can best manage life with the diagnosis from a leading movement disorder specialist. **Dinner will be served.** **Location**: The Heights at Avery Heights, 550 Avery Heights, Hartford, CT 06106 Call Siobhan at [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201) or . : **Registration is required. Please see registration form below.** ![Duarte Machado, MD](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/Unknown-scaled-e1752773173993.jpeg "Duarte Machado, MD") ## **This event has passed Thank you for your interest** --- ### [west hartford assisted living - Avery Heights - Hartford, CT](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-avery-heights-hartford-ct/) **Published:** April 1, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # west hartford assisted living – Avery Heights – Hartford, CT Avery Heights Address: 705 New Britain Ave, Hartford, CT 06106 City and State: Hartford, CT Phone: [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) URL: Avery Heights is a nonprofit retirement community offering a full-continuum of services including residential living, assisted living, assisted living memory care, short-term rehabilitation, intermediate nursing care, and skilled nursing care. Visit our website to learn more. < Previous Map Next Map > --- ### [Greater Hartford Area](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING SERVICES AND AMENITIES ](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/ "INDEPENDENT LIVINGSERVICES AND AMENITIES") ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") # Greater Hartford Area ## Your Next Chapter Begins at Avery Heights Nestled in the heart of Greater Hartford, Avery Heights offers the perfect blend of history, culture, and excitement with easy access to dining, shopping, entertainment, and outdoor beauty. ### Why Choose Avery Heights? - Stunning Natural Surroundings – 43 acres of walking trails for outdoor enthusiasts - Premier Golf Courses - Convenient Travel – Close to airports, hotels, and major interstates - Rich History and Culture – Explore local landmarks like the Mark Twain House and the Harriet Beecher Stowe House - Renowned Museums – Visit the Wadsworth Atheneum, The Amistad Center, and the Noah Webster Museum - Top-Tier Dining & Shopping – Plus wineries, breweries, and a vibrant food scene - World-Class Entertainment – Theaters, concerts, and cultural events ### Discover More Start your next chapter at Avery Heights and experience the best of Greater Hartford. Contact us today at [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) to learn more! --- ### [Spiritual Care](https://averyheights.org/wellness/spiritual-care/) **Published:** December 2, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS SUPPORT GROUPS ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/support-groups/ "WELLNESSSUPPORT GROUPS") ## [ WELLNESS WALKING TRAILS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/ "WELLNESSWALKING TRAILS") # Spiritual Care Avery Heights recognizes the importance of spiritual nourishment and offers many ways to foster connection, peace, and reflection. Our serene Julia Gilman Clark Chapel provides a beautiful space where residents can reflect or meditate. Whether visiting for a few minutes of calm or deeper contemplation, the chapel offers tranquility that is open to all faith backgrounds and spiritual practices. Residents also have access to various opportunities for personal and community growth. Small group Bible discussions encourage shared insights and exploration of faith, while our weekly ecumenical worship services unite residents in reverence. For those experiencing spiritual distress or simply seeking a listening ear, our dedicated chaplain is available for individual visits, offering compassionate support and guidance. These offerings foster spiritual well-being and a strong sense of community, honoring the diverse faith journeys of all our residents. For more information or to schedule a tour, please contact our chaplain at [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 326. --- ### [Walking Trails](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS FITNESS CENTER ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/ "WELLNESSFITNESS CENTER") ## [ WELLNESS POOL ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/ "WELLNESSPOOL") # Walking Trails Discover the beauty of nature at Avery Heights with our thoughtfully designed walking trails-perfect for leisurely strolls, invigorating exercise, or simply enjoying the fresh air. Whether you prefer a short, scenic loop or a longer, winding path, our accessible trails cater to all abilities, providing a safe and serene environment to connect with the outdoors and enhance your well-being. Available to our residents and guests, we host a weekly guided walking group to meet new friends and enjoy the company of others while exploring our trails. For more information or to schedule a tour, contact, please contact Mark Modifica at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 450. --- ### [Fitness Center](https://averyheights.org/wellness/fitness-center/) **Published:** August 13, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS POOL ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/marjorie-b-doty-aquatic-center/ "WELLNESSPOOL") ## [ WELLNESS WALKING TRAILS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/ "WELLNESSWALKING TRAILS") # Fitness Center ![Fitness center, The Heights](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Fitness-Banner-AH-1024x308.jpg) Our fitness center is staffed by Exercise Physiologist Mark Modifica, who provides residents with customized conditioning plans and monitors progress toward their wellness goals. Our innovative fitness center is equipped with: - A circuit line of Nautilus strength-training equipment covering all major muscle groups - Treadmills - Bikes - Elliptical machines - NuSteps The equipment, based on current scientific research and evaluation, is designed to: - Enhance cardiovascular endurance - Boost muscular strength - Reduce the risk of injury This supervised program of exercise classes, weight resistance training, and aerobic training offers key elements to healthy aging. The fitness center is funded in part by a grant from the Hartford Foundation for Public Giving and many private donors. For more information or to schedule a tour, please contact Mark Modifica at mmodifica@churchhomes.org or (860) 953-1201 ext. 450. --- ### [Support Groups](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/support-groups/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ WELLNESS SPIRITUAL CARE ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/spiritual-care/ "WELLNESSSPIRITUAL CARE") ## [ WELLNESS WALKING TRAILS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/walking-trails/ "WELLNESSWALKING TRAILS") # Support Groups ## **Welcome to Our Support Groups** ### Support Groups at Avery Heights: A Community of Care & Connection At Avery Heights, we recognize the importance of emotional and social well-being, particularly in life’s later stages. Our support groups are a welcoming space for residents and their families to connect, share experiences, and find guidance. --- ### Parkinson’s Caregiver Support Group ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/CT-APDA-support-group-300x103.png) In partnership with the Connecticut Chapter of the American Parkinson Disease Association, The Heights offers a support group for those caring for a loved one with Parkinson’s disease or Parkinsonism. This group provides a safe and supportive environment to share experiences, learn from others, develop coping strategies, and manage challenges. Meetings are open to the public on the first Wednesday of each month at 10:30 AM. For more information, contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. --- ### Caregivers Support Group Caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s, dementia, or memory loss comes with unique challenges. Our Caregiver Support Group provides a welcoming space for family and friends to gather, share, listen, and learn practical caregiving skills. Holly Taylor-Fry, CTRS, Certified Dementia Practitioner and Director of Burnham FamilyMemory Care Residence, and Roseanne Holland, LCSW, Resident Services Coordinator, facilitate this monthly meeting at The Heights at Avery Heights. For details on upcoming meetings, contact Holly at or Roseanne at . At Avery Heights, no one walks this journey alone. Join us in creating a community of support, understanding, and connection. --- ### [Dining](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/dining/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENT LIVING") ## [ SERVICES AND AMENITIES WELLNESS ](https://averyheights.org/wellness/ "SERVICES AND AMENITIESWELLNESS") # Delightful Dining at The Heights for Residents and Families ### Dining at The Heights: A Community Experience At The Heights, dining is an opportunity to foster connection, well-being, and joy. Whether you’re a resident or family member, our thoughtfully crafted meals create a welcoming and nourishing experience. ### Nutritious and Delicious Meals Our culinary team ensures every meal is both nutritious and flavorful while supporting seniors’ well-being. Our menus meet dietary needs through gourmet-quality meals that promote energy, mental sharpness, and overall health. ### A Dining Experience to Remember Mealtime at The Heights is a cherished experience shared among residents, family, and friends. Our bright, inviting dining space sets the stage for meaningful conversations and lasting memories. Seasonal menus feature a mix of classic favorites, international flavors, and innovative dishes, keeping dining exciting and enjoyable. ### Heart-Healthy & Fresh Ingredients Our chefs’ heart-healthy meals use fresh, high-quality ingredients to create flavorful dishes: from vibrant salads to homemade soups, every option is designed with your well-being (and taste) in mind. ### A Warm, Welcoming Environment The Heights offers an inclusive dining setting where residents can relax and connect. Our private dining space is also available for special occasions, making celebrations with loved ones even more meaningful. ### Voices from The Heights Residents and their families consistently praise our dining program’s quality, variety, and warmth. Testimonials highlight the joy of delicious meals, the peace of mind from nutritious choices, and the sense of belonging fostered around the table. ### Experience Dining at The Heights Discover firsthand what makes our dining experience exceptional. For more information or to schedule a visit, contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403. --- ### [PD Dance Registration](https://averyheights.org/pd-dance-registration/) **Published:** April 23, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![PD in Motion Exercise Program](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/pd-in-motion-logo.jpg "pd-in-motion-logo")## Dance for PD® Enjoy empowering dance, movement, and music in a supportive setting. This chair-based class helps with balance, flexibility, coordination, and gait-no dance experience needed. **When**: Wednesday, October 22 and November 26, 2025 at 11:00 AM **Featuring**: Teaching Artist Amy Valente from Neighborhood Music School in New Haven, CT ## PD Dance Registration Name(Required) First Last Email(Required) Phone(Required) Submit Δ --- ### [PD Boxing Registration](https://averyheights.org/pd-boxing-registration/) **Published:** April 23, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![PD in Motion Exercise Program](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/pd-in-motion-logo.jpg "pd-in-motion-logo")## Rock Steady Boxing® Non-contact boxing workout tailored to improve strength, balance, and confidence in a supportive, Parkinson’s-focused environment. Brought to you by a generous grant from the American Parkinson Disease Association Connecticut Chapter (CT-APDA) **When**: Every Tuesday at 1:30 PM **Featuring**: Coach Donna Calabrese from Hits & Kicks, LLC ## PD Boxing Registration Name(Required) First Last Email(Required) Phone(Required) Submit Δ --- ### [Moving Forward](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ JOIN OUR COMMUNITY TALKING TO YOUR LOVED ONE ](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/talking-to-your-loved-one/ "JOIN OUR COMMUNITYTALKING TO YOUR LOVED ONE") ## [ GETTING STARTED ](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/ "GETTING STARTED") # Moving Forward ## Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community [When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/moving-forward/talking-to-your-loved-one/), you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. This interview shares insights and strategies to help your senior parent or loved one overcome their resistance to relocating and navigate this transition with greater ease. ## About Our Guest ### ***Shelia Gavish*** ![Shelia Gavish](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_0855-255x300.jpg)Shelia Gavish With her extensive background of designing interiors for senior care communities, Shelia Gavish brings a wealth of experience to her role of relocating seniors at Amston Home Transition Solutions. Understanding the challenges seniors and their families face when navigating age-related and necessary relocations, Shelia is dedicated to providing valuable tips and strategies to help ease these transitions. Her presentations offer insights that aim to help loved ones considering a move to a senior care community. Shelia is known for her engaging demeanor and competent compassionate presentation style, which reflect her unwavering commitment to improving the lives of seniors and their families as they navigate life-changing decisions and moves in their later years. For more information, please call [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201) or email --- ### [PD in Motion Exercise Program](https://averyheights.org/pd-in-motion-exercise-program/) **Published:** April 23, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![PD in Motion Exercise Program](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/pd-in-motion-logo.jpg "pd-in-motion-logo")## Rock Steady Boxing® Non-contact boxing workout tailored to improve strength, balance, and confidence in a supportive, Parkinson’s-focused environment. Brought to you by a generous grant from the American Parkinson Disease Association Connecticut Chapter (CT-APDA) **When**: Tuesday, July 8 & Tuesday, July 22 at 1:30 PM **Featuring**: Coach Donna Calabrese from Hits & Kicks, LLC [ REGISTER NOW ](https://averyheights.org/pd-boxing-registration/)## Dance for PD® Enjoy empowering dance, movement, and music in a supportive setting. This chair-based class helps with balance, flexibility, coordination, and gait-no dance experience needed. **When**: Wednesday, July 23 at 11:00 AM **Featuring**: Teaching Artist Amy Valente from Neighborhood Music School in New Haven, CT [ REGISTER NOW ](https://averyheights.org/pd-dance-registration/) --- ### [Current Openings](https://averyheights.org/career/current-openings/) **Published:** January 6, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ CAREERS BENEFITS ](https://averyheights.org/career/employment-benefits/ "CAREERSBENEFITS") ## CAREERS VIDEO / TESTIMONIALS # Current Openings Welcome to Avery Heights’ Careers page! We are excited to invite passionate and dedicated individuals to join our vibrant [community](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/). At Avery Heights, we believe in fostering a supportive and innovative environment where every team member can thrive and make a meaningful impact. Explore our current job openings to find opportunities that align with your skills and aspirations, and take the next step in your professional journey with us. For information on current job openings, email [**hr@churchhomes.org.**](mailto:hr@churchhomes.org) [View all jobs](//churchhomes.applytojob.com/apply/jobs/) --- ### [Activity Calendar](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/activity-calendar/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Activity Calendar ## Make New Memories There’s so much to see! Just minutes away from downtown Hartford, we provide coaches to the city so residents can experience the many cultural highlights. Go to Blue Back Square for dinner, shopping, or a movie. Or stay on our active, 43-acre campus. Mingle with other residents during cocktail hour, attend one of our concerts, savor delicious snacks and refreshing beverages at a tea party, or get fit by joining an exercise class. There’s all that and more! ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/april-2025-edited1.jpeg) [ Click Here to Download ](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/april-2025-edited.pdf) --- ### [Short-Term Rehabilitation](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ HEALTH SERVICES ASSISTED LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/ "HEALTH SERVICESASSISTED LIVING") ## [ HEALTH SERVICES MEMORY CARE ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "HEALTH SERVICESMEMORY CARE") # Discover the Power of Short-Term Rehabilitation: Your Journey to Recovery Reimagined ### Contact Avery Heights today about Short-Term Rehabilitation Drop us a line today to learn more about our Short-Term Rehabilitation services! [ Click Now! ](https://averyheights.org/contact/)Are you recovering from surgery, injury, or illness? The Avery Rehabilitation Center provides expert short-term rehabilitation in a supportive and comfortable environment to help you regain independence and full functionality. ## Expert, Individualized Care Our highly trained interdisciplinary team includes physicians, nurse practitioners, therapists, dietitians, social workers, and pastoral counselors, all dedicated to your recovery. ### Specialized Rehabilitation Services - Physical, occupational, speech, and respiratory therapy (available 7 days a week) - On-staff geriatrician, pulmonologist, and cardiologist - Aquatic therapy in a state-of-the-art indoor pool - Advanced medical support, including IV therapy, PICC lines, wound care, and outpatient dialysis - Diabetic and pain management programs ### Comfort and Hospitality Features - Private rooms available with flat-screen TVs - Cable, WiFi, and private phones - Menu services with personalized meals - Laundry services - Open visiting hours - 24-hour security ## Schedule a Visit Experience exceptional short-term rehabilitation at Avery Rehabilitation Center. Contact Isabella Pereira at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 433 for more information or to schedule a tour. --- ### [The Villager](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/the-villager/) **Published:** September 25, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [Hearing Aid Specialist](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/hearing-aid-specialist/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Hearing Services ## ![Hearing Services](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Pic-EarwSound-Wave-logo.jpg) ## Comprehensive Hearing Services at The Heights Hearing health is an essential aspect of our overall well-being, but it’s often overlooked, especially as we age. At The Heights, we prioritize providing accessible and high-quality services to address the hearing needs of our residents. That’s why we’re delighted to collaborate with Sam Johnston of NOVA Hearing Services, a trusted Hearing Instrument Specialist, to bring regular, professional hearing care straight to our community. But what does this entail? Below, we’ll answer some of the common questions about the hearing services available at The Heights and why this partnership is valuable for our residents. ### What Are Hearing Services, and Why Are They Important? Hearing services include a range of assessments, solutions, and ongoing care designed to support individuals experiencing hearing loss or other auditory challenges. These services are vital because hearing loss impacts not just one’s ability to hear but also one’s quality of life. If left untreated, it can lead to feelings of isolation, difficulty in communication, and even cognitive decline. Convenient access to hearing care ensures that residents of assisted living facilities like The Heights don’t have to face the challenges of traveling to multiple appointments. By offering on-site services, we make it easier for residents to stay connected and engaged in their daily lives. ### Who Is Sam Johnston, and What is NOVA Hearing Services? Sam Johnston is a highly experienced Hearing Instrument Specialist who brings years of expertise to The Heights. What sets Sam and NOVA Hearing Services apart is their independent and portable practice model. Unlike large audiology chains, being independent allows NOVA Hearing Services to offer a personalized approach, tailoring solutions to each individual’s unique hearing needs. Their portable service means that they can come directly to us, providing convenience and consistency for our residents. ### What Happens During a Hearing Assessment? The great news is that hearing assessments with NOVA Hearing Services are completely free. A typical hearing assessment involves several steps: - **Medical History**-Sam will review the individual’s medical and hearing history to better understand their concerns and potential causes of hearing loss. - **Hearing Test**-A complete hearing test uses advanced audiometric equipment to measure the individual’s ability to hear different sounds, tones, and speech. - **Results Discussion**-Sam explains the results in a clear and accessible way, ensuring that everyone understands their hearing health. - **Recommendations and Next Steps**-Depending on the results, Sam may recommend solutions such as hearing aids, custom ear molds, or follow-up consultations. These assessments provide a holistic view of each person’s hearing needs and set the foundation for their care plan. ### Can Hearing Aids Really Make a Difference? Yes, hearing aids can significantly improve the lives of individuals experiencing hearing loss! Modern hearing aids are nothing like the bulky, uncomfortable devices of the past. They’re discreet, comfortable, and equipped with cutting-edge technology. New features include automatic background noise adjustment, directional microphones, and wireless compatibility with smartphones and other devices. NOVA Hearing Services excels in offering expert hearing aid fitting. A properly fitted [hearing aid](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hearing_aid) is crucial to ensure comfort and optimal performance. Sam Johnston works closely with residents to ensure their hearing aids meet their specific needs and preferences. ### What if I’m Not Sure About Needing a Hearing Aid? It’s completely normal to feel unsure. That’s why starting with a free hearing assessment is so valuable. Even if a hearing aid isn’t the right solution immediately, regular monitoring ensures that hearing health is managed proactively. Sam provides ongoing support and adjusts recommendations as changes in hearing occur. ### Why Are Regular Hearing Check-ups Essential for Older Adults? Hearing loss is a common issue among older adults-about one in three people aged 65+ experience some degree of hearing loss. Regular check-ups help in: - **Early Detection**-Identifying hearing loss early prevents it from worsening. - **Better Communication**-Addressing hearing issues promptly ensures residents stay active in conversations with family, friends, and caregivers. - **Improved Quality of Life**-With proper hearing support, individuals often notice increased confidence and emotional well-being. By offering monthly visits, Sam Johnston ensures that residents of The Heights have access to consistent care tailored to their evolving needs. ### What Makes Hearing Services at The Heights Special? The Heights goes above and beyond to provide convenient and accessible healthcare options for our residents. Having Sam Johnston and NOVA Hearing Services visit monthly means no one has to travel long distances or wait weeks for an appointment. The personalized care and friendly approach make every resident feel valued-this isn’t just a hearing test; it’s a step toward a better quality of life. Furthermore, residents receive care in a familiar and comfortable environment. This reduces [anxiety](https://averyheights.org/west-hartford-assisted-living-transitioning-smoothly/) and ensures that they can focus on their well-being without unnecessary disruptions. ### What if I Have Further Questions About Hearing Health? We know that hearing health can come with plenty of questions, and NOVA Hearing Services is here to answer them all. Whether you’re curious about how hearing aids work, how often you should have your hearing checked, or what technology options are available, Sam Johnston is ready to help. You can always reach out to The Heights staff to learn more about scheduling a hearing assessment during Sam’s next visit. For more information, please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403. --- ### [Shop](https://averyheights.org/shop/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/facebook_1736286232776_7282512291281349408.jpg) ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/facebook_1736286290239_7282512532295951567.jpg)# The Villager at The Heights The Villager at Avery Heights is a quaint shop located in The Heights. Here, you will find unique gifts, beautiful clothing, accessory items, jewelry, a lovely selection of greeting cards, and even postage stamps! We also have an extensive variety of sundries, including grooming products, first aid necessities, stationery, batteries, snacks, and so much more. Our store hours are **Monday through Friday, 10:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m**., and we are open to the public. There’s always something new at The Villager! --- ### [Pet Care](https://averyheights.org/about-us/affiliations-and-partnerships/pet-care/) **Published:** October 25, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Pet Care ## Your 4 Legged Pet Service: Pet Care You Can Trust ![Pet Care](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Y4LPS17-v2-289x300.jpg)At Your 4 Legged Pet Service, we understand that your pets are more than just animals-they’re part of your family. Since 2009, we’ve proudly offered pet care services designed to ensure the health, happiness, and well-being of your furry friends. Located in [Hartford, CT](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hartford,_Connecticut), we are a fully insured and bonded small business built on trust, compassion, and a deep love for animals. We are here to provide reliable and tailored pet care solutions. Whether you need daily [dog walking](https://averyheights.org/pet-therapy-and-memory-care/), pet sitting during vacations, or specialized care for your senior pet, our experienced team is committed to making life easier for you and enriching the lives of your “four-legged” family members. ### Comprehensive Pet Care Services for All Needs We offer a variety of pet care services that can be customized to fit the unique needs of you and your pet: - **Dog Walking**: Whether it’s a quick potty break or a long stroll through the park, we ensure your dog gets the exercise and companionship they need. - **Pet Sitting**: Heading out of town? Our team will provide loving care and attention for your pets in the comfort of their own home. - **Cat Sitting**: Cats deserve TLC, too! We’ll cater to their needs, from feeding to playtime and everything in between. - **Litter Box Cleaning**: No mess, no stress-keeping your cat’s space fresh and hygienic. - **Medication Administration**: For pets on special treatments, we offer professional administration of medications to ensure your pet’s health regimen stays on track. - **Cat Nail Trimming**: Keep your cat’s claws in check with our safe and stress-free trimming services. Every service is delivered with reliability and affection, ensuring your pets are cared for as if they were our own. ### Pet Care at The Heights… For pet owners at The Heights, pet care can be both a joy and a challenge. That’s where Your 4 Legged Pet Service steps in to bridge the gap, allowing residents to experience the love and companionship of their pets without the overwhelming responsibility. ## Why Choose Your 4 Legged Pet Service at The Heights? ### Expert Curation & Care Our dedicated team is experienced and passionate about pets. They ensure that every service is delivered with care and professionalism. ### Peace of Mind Fully insured and bonded, we offer dependable services to provide you with total peace of mind while you’re away or unavailable. Tasting Notes for Happiness Just like the perfect cup of coffee has tasting notes, we tailor our care to each pet’s unique “personality,” making every experience as fulfilling and satisfying as possible. ### A Strong Community of Pet Lovers We’re not just a service-we’re a community! From sharing tips on pet care to connecting like-minded individuals, we’re here to foster a sense of belonging for all pet owners. To learn more about pet care services at The Heights in partnership with your 4 Legged Pet Service, please contact Siobhan Mattingly at or [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403. --- ### [Cultural Values](https://averyheights.org/career/cultural-values/) **Published:** January 6, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ CAREERS CURRENT OPENINGS ](https://averyheights.org/career/current-openings/ "CAREERSCURRENT OPENINGS") ## [ CAREERS BENEFITS ](https://averyheights.org/career/employment-benefits/ "CAREERSBENEFITS") # Cultural Values ## Welcome to Avery Heights: Dedicated to Building a Community of Excellence Avery Heights is a thriving community built on strong values and a positive culture. As a [Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC)](https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/basics/info-2017/continuing-care-retirement-communities.html), we are dedicated to creating an environment where our residents and employees feel valued, respected, and empowered. Here’s what makes working at Avery Heights truly special: ### Our Core Values **Compassion**: We prioritize empathy and understanding in everything we do. Whether caring for our residents or supporting our colleagues, we strive to create an atmosphere of warmth and kindness. **Integrity**: Trust is the foundation of our community. We uphold the highest standards of honesty and ethical behavior in all our interactions. **Excellence**: We are committed to providing the highest quality of care and service. Continuous improvement and professional development are key components of our culture. **Respect**: Diversity and inclusion are at the heart of our community. We celebrate the unique backgrounds and perspectives of each individual and treat everyone with dignity. **Teamwork**: Collaboration and open communication are essential to our success. We work together to achieve common goals and support each other in our shared mission. ### The Avery Heights Experience **Supportive Work Environment**: We understand the importance of a positive and supportive work environment. We offer opportunities for professional growth, continuing education, and career advancement. **Resident-Centered Care**: Our residents are at the center of everything we do. We take pride in providing personalized care that enhances their quality of life and promotes their well-being. **Community Engagement**: We believe in the power of community. Our employees are encouraged to participate in community events, volunteer opportunities, and social activities that strengthen our bonds. We value the hard work and dedication of our employees. Join us at Avery Heights and be part of a team dedicated to making a difference in the lives of our residents and each other. Together, we can create a community where everyone feels valued, respected, and empowered. ### Discover the Avery Heights Difference Explore career opportunities at Avery Heights and experience the rewarding work that comes with being part of our vibrant and compassionate community. Visit our [Careers](https://averyheights.org/career/) page to learn more and apply today! --- ### [Pet Friendly](https://averyheights.org/pet-friendly/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Pet Friendly Regardless of age, pets play an important role in our lives, but their positive impact is even more significant for seniors. At [The Heights](https://averyheights.org/about-us/), we know how important pets are to your health and well-being, which is why our senior living community is pet-friendly. ## Pet Policy for The Heights Senior Living Residents The Heights requires all pet owners to sign a special lease and identify a person to care for the pet in the event of an emergency. We also ask that all pets be licensed in accordance with state and local laws, and proof of inoculation and vet contact information is required. Friendly, well-behaved dogs and cats are welcome. A pet security deposit is required to cover any pet-related damage or expenses. For more information on our pet policies at The Heights, please contact us at [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201). ***Illustrations provided by:*** Anderson Animal Portraits Artist: Gretchen H. Anderson [Contact](https://www.facebook.com/gretchen.anderson.980) [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/cache/2025/01/IMG_5971/1429179699.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_5971.jpg) [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/cache/2025/01/IMG_5580/3588714073.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_5580.jpg) [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/cache/2025/01/IMG_5509/52610633.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_5509.jpg) [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/cache/2025/01/FullSizeR/2693137978.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/FullSizeR.jpg) --- ### [Community Map](https://averyheights.org/our-community/community-map/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Campus Map ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/09/Campus-Map-09.24_1-1024x622.jpeg) [ Click to Download Printable Version ](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/09/Campus-Map-09.24.pdf) --- ### [News](https://averyheights.org/news/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ##### Modal Popup – ID Click here to edit the "Modal Popup" settings. This text will not be visible on frontend. # News --- ### [Volunteer](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/volunteer/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ MAKING A DIFFERENCE SUPPORTING VETERANS ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/supporting-veterans/ "MAKING A DIFFERENCESUPPORTING VETERANS") ## [ MAKING A DIFFERENCE GOLF TOURNAMENT ](https://averyheights.org/make-a-difference/golf-classic/ "MAKING A DIFFERENCEGOLF TOURNAMENT") # What Does a Volunteer Do at Avery Heights? ## Make a Difference – Become a Volunteer at Avery Heights Our dedicated volunteers play a vital role in enhancing the quality of life for our residents, bringing joy, companionship, and a connection to the larger community. Whether you have a few hours to spare or can volunteer regularly, we’d love to welcome you to our team! ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/iStock-621904232-2048x1365.jpg-1024x683.webp) ## Ways to Volunteer - Read to a Resident – Share the joy of storytelling with those who have limited vision - Bring a Certified Therapy Dog – Provide companionship through friendly pet visits - Offer Tech Support – Help residents set up email, social media, or devices - Host Special Events – Assist at art shows, receptions, and community gatherings - Become a Special Friend – Offer companionship and brighten someone’s day ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/iStock-1362838828-2048x1323.jpg-1024x662.webp) ### How to Get Involved Volunteering is easy! Call Susan Frione at [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 501 or fill out our Volunteer Form online. Join us in making a difference-we can’t wait to welcome you to the Avery Heights volunteer family! ## Become a Volunteer LinkedIn This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. Name(Required) First Last Email(Required) Phone(Required) Tell us about yourself and the kind of volunteer work you'd like to do. Submit Δ --- ### [Meet our Residents](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/meet-our-residents/) **Published:** December 3, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [Lifestyle](https://averyheights.org/lifestyle/) **Published:** August 13, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![LIfestyle](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/affectionate-senior-couple-attending-dancing-class-2024-10-20-21-23-23-utc-scaled.jpg)# Lifestyle ## The Avery Heights Lifestyle Avery Heights’ senior living lifestyle is designed to promote your independence and freedom. Our private community, set amid natural scenic woodlands in Greater Hartford, CT, provides maintenance-free living so you can enjoy life by your own design. This vibrant, independent lifestyle also offers guaranteed access to on-site, comprehensive healthcare so you will feel supported if your health needs change. ### At Avery Heights, it’s your life, your style, and your adventure: - Enjoy exceptional maintenance-free living in our Cottages or Apartments. - Spend more time with friends and family, or pursue your favorite [activities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/activity-calendar/). - Revitalize your body, mind, and spirit with our [wellness](https://averyheights.org/wellness/) offerings. - Satisfy your culinary cravings with delicious [chef-prepared dining](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/dining/). - Take an art class, or play pool-[great services and amenities](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenties/) are on campus and in the surrounding area. - Enjoy beautifully landscaped grounds, walking paths, and gardens. - Visit local shops and activities or [explore the Greater Hartford area](https://averyheights.org/our-location/greater-hartford-area/). --- ### [Letter from the President](https://averyheights.org/letter-from-the-president/) **Published:** August 13, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [Health and Wellness](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/services-and-amenities/health-and-wellness/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INDEPENDENT LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/ "INDEPENDENTLIVING") ## HEALTHCARE CONTINUUM OF CARE # Health and Wellness The Reaching New Heights fitness program aims to ensure your independence and well-being with our state-of-the-art Doty Aquatic Center, fitness center, and scenic half-mile walking trail. ***Majorie B. Doty Aquatic Center*** Since 2008, residents have enjoyed the luxury of swimming year-round in our heated indoor pool. Graduated steps and handrails make the pool’s warm water easily accessible. ***The Fitness Center*** Our fitness center is staffed by Exercise Physiologist Mark Modifica, who provides residents with customized conditioning plans and monitors progress toward their individual wellness goals. ***Walking Trails*** Our scenic half-mile walking trail is open to all residents. It includes fitness stations designed to develop strength, endurance, and cardiovascular ability. --- ### [Letter from our Director](https://averyheights.org/independent-living/letter-from-our-director/) **Published:** January 5, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Letter from our Director ![The Heights Logo](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/The-heights-trans-back.png) Hello! As the Director of Independent Living, it is my pleasure to welcome you to The Heights, and to our cottage neighborhood, both located on the beautiful 43-acre campus of Avery Heights. For over thirty years, it has been my pleasure to work with the residents of this wonderful community. I appreciate the opportunity to share a little about the many advantages of choosing to make your home at Avery Heights. When asked, our residents will invariably tell you that they based their decision to move here on one (or more) of these three reasons: - Avery Heights is a Continuum of Care community offering independent living, assisted living, assisted living memory care, intermediate nursing care, and short- and long-term skilled nursing care. As you or your partner’s needs change, Avery Heights has a level of care to support you. - There is no expensive buy-in. The Heights and Cottages offer a broad range of rental-only prices and unit layouts and sizes. With no expensive buy-in, you retain maximum flexibility to manage your financial resources as you prefer. - Avery Heights’ location provides convenient proximity to Greater Hartford’s major medical centers, educational institutions, and cultural venues. My team’s goal, when you move to your new home on our campus, is to live up to Avery Heights’ not-for-profit mission to promote and maintain your optimal independence. We do this by introducing you to a wide-ranging menu of services and amenities, and to a vibrant community of neighbors who, like you, have worked hard to secure a comfortable retirement. When you join us, you will come to appreciate a culture which prioritizes activity, engagement, and fellowship. I hope you will make the move to The Heights…I’m confident you will be glad you did! Sincerely, William A. Englehart William A. Englehart Director of Independent Living ![Englehart-Bill-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0752-1638x2048.jpg-240x300](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Englehart-Bill-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0752-1638x2048.jpg-240x300-1.webp "Englehart-Bill-Avery-Heights-Headshots-AZVPHOTOMEDIACOM-0752-1638x2048.jpg-240x300") --- ### [Long Term Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ INTERMEDIATE CARE ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/intermediate-care/ "INTERMEDIATE CARE") ## [ HEALTH SERVICES SHORT-TERM REHAB ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/short-term-rehabilitation/ "HEALTH SERVICESSHORT-TERM REHAB") # Long-Term Care ### Contact Avery Heights today about Long Term Care Drop us a line today to learn more about our Long Term Care services! [ Click Now! ](https://averyheights.org/contact/)## Compassionate, Expert Long-Term Care at Avery Health Care Center When living at home is no longer safe or caregiving becomes overwhelming, Avery Health Care Center offers skilled, compassionate long-term care in a secure, home-like environment. ## Comprehensive, 24/7 Care Our dedicated team of physicians, nurses, therapists, dietitians, and social workers provides round-the-clock medical oversight. Certified Nursing Assistants specialize in geriatric care to support residents’ physical, cognitive, and emotional needs with warmth and professionalism. ## Exceptional Services and Amenities - 24/7 medical & nursing care supervised by a board-certified medical director - Family-focused environment with open visiting hours with free parking - Music and art therapy - Pain and wound management - Wellness center and interdenominational chapel - On-site hair salon, gift shop, and dental services - Hospice and rehabilitation services (7 days a week) - 24-hour security ## Personalized, Strength-Based Care We involve families in individualized care planning, focusing on residents’ strengths and abilities to encourage meaningful engagement and enriched living. ## Schedule a Visit Give your loved one the care they deserve in a respectful, supportive environment. Contact Isabella Pereira at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 433 to learn more or arrange a tour. --- ### [Letter from our Administrator](https://averyheights.org/health-services/letter-from-our-administrator/) **Published:** December 2, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Letter from our Administrator ![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Avery-Heights-207-300x175.png) Welcome to Avery Heights, where our primary goal is to provide exceptional care and a home filled with compassion, dignity, and respect. As the Administrator, I am honored to lead a dedicated team of professionals who are committed to enhancing the quality of life for those we serve. At Avery Heights, we understand the importance of personalized care. Our staff is devoted to creating a warm and supportive environment, tailoring our services to meet the unique needs of each resident. We believe in fostering a sense of community where everyone feels valued and supported. Our [campus](https://averyheights.org/our-community/community-map/) offers a wide range of services, from comprehensive skilled care and rehabilitation programs to engaging activities and social events. We strive to ensure that everyone in our care not only receives the highest standard of care but also enjoys a fulfilling and enriching experience. We invite you to explore our website to learn more about our services, meet our staff, and discover the vibrant [community](https://averyheights.org/join-our-community/) that awaits you. If you have any questions or would like to schedule a visit, please do not hesitate to contact us. We look forward to welcoming you to our family. Sincerely, Michael Latina Michael Latina ![Michael Latina](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/Latina-Michael-Avery-Heights-Headshots-240x300.jpg "Latina-Michael-Avery Heights Headshots") --- ### [Intermediate Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/intermediate-care/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ HEALTH SERVICES SHORT-TERM REHAB ](https://averyheights.org/short-term-rehabilitation/ "HEALTH SERVICESSHORT-TERM REHAB") ## [ HEALTH SERVICES LONG-TERM CARE ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/long-term-care/ "HEALTH SERVICESLONG-TERM CARE") # Discover a Haven of Comfort and Intermediate Care at Noble Residence ### Contact Avery Heights today about Intermediate Care Drop us a line today to learn more about our Intermediate Care services! [ Click Now! ](https://averyheights.org/contact/)## Enjoy the Good Things in Life, Even When Medical Support is Needed At The Noble Residence, we provide intermediate care that balances independence with medical support to ensure residents enjoy security, round-the-clock nursing care, and vibrant social engagement in a warm, home-like environment. ## A Home Away from Home Nestled within Avery Heights, The Noble Residence offers: - A safe, comfortable setting designed to feel like home - Beautiful landscapes and cozy common areas for relaxation and socializing - Compassionate caregivers who provide personalized support ## Comprehensive Services - 24/7 Security & Healthcare Assistance – Immediate medical response - Engaging Social Activities – Art classes, fitness sessions, and events to keep residents active and connected - Personalized Care Plans – Tailored to evolving health needs while promoting autonomy ## Intermediate Care: Independence with Support We focus on individualized care that adapts to residents’ changing needs, empowering them to lead fulfilling and independent lives while receiving the necessary support. ## Join Our Community Choosing the right care setting enhances quality of life at every stage. Experience The Noble Residence difference-where seniors thrive with comfort, care, and companionship. For more information or to schedule a visit, contact Isabella Pereira at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:18609531201) ext. 433. --- ### [Home Health Care](https://averyheights.org/health-services/home-health-care/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ HEALTH SERVICES ASSISTED LIVING ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/assisted-living/ "HEALTH SERVICESASSISTED LIVING") ## [ HEALTH SERVICES MEMORY CARE ](https://averyheights.org/health-services/memory-care/ "HEALTH SERVICESMEMORY CARE") # Discover the Impact of Home Care by Avery Heights on Senior Well-Being ### Contact Avery Heights today about Home Care Drop us a line today to learn more about our Home Care services! [ Click Now! ](https://averyheights.org/contact/)## Compassionate & Professional Home Care by Avery Heights Home Care by Avery Heights provides personalized, compassionate care for individuals facing illness or age-related changes who wish to remain in their homes. Serving Avery Heights and the [Greater Hartford area](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greater_Hartford), we help clients maintain independence and improve their quality of life. ## Comprehensive Home Care Services Our skilled professionals offer a full range of home care solutions, including: - Skilled Nursing Care – Medical support provided by experienced nurses - Therapy Services – Physical, occupational, and speech therapy to enhance mobility and independence - Home Care Aides & Companions – Assistance with daily activities and companionship - Social Services – Resources to support emotional and social well-being - Chore Services – Housekeeping, laundry, and meal preparation - Medication Assistance – Help with medication management and reminders - Respite Care – Temporary relief for caregivers ## Why Home Care Matters - Independence & Comfort – Seniors can remain in familiar surroundings with essential support - Personalized Attention – Tailored care plans for physical, emotional, and social well-being - Support for Caregivers – Respite care prevents burnout, allowing family members to recharge ## Arranging Home Care is Simple If you or a loved one needs home care, our team is here to help. Contact Kerrie Palumbo RN, BSN at or [(860) 953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 428 to discuss your needs and start the process. ## A Positive Impact on the Community - Reduces strain on healthcare facilities by providing care at home - Encourages social engagement and reduces isolation - Improves quality of life through personalized, compassionate support ## Experience the Avery Heights Difference Let us help you navigate aging with confidence. [Contact us](https://averyheights.org/contact/) today to learn more about our expert home care services and how we can support you or your loved one. --- ### [Events](https://averyheights.org/events/) **Published:** September 25, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [Request Information](https://averyheights.org/contact/request-information/) **Published:** November 4, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** # Request Information ## Request Information Email This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. Your Name(Required) Your Email(Required) Your Phone Number(Required) What are you inquiring about?General inquiryIndependent LivingAssisted LivingSkilled NursingMemory CareHome Health CareShort-Term RehabilitationParkinsons In MotionVeteransVolunteerVeterans & Senior Living Information Any additional information? Submit Δ --- ### [VIDEOS / TESTIMONIALS](https://averyheights.org/career/videos-testimonials/) **Published:** January 6, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ CAREERS BENEFITS ](https://averyheights.org/career/employment-benefits/ "CAREERSBENEFITS") ## [ CAREERS Cultural Values ](https://averyheights.org/career/employment-benefits/ "CAREERSCultural Values") # Videos / Testimonials ## Coming Soon --- ### [Employment Benefits](https://averyheights.org/career/employment-benefits/) **Published:** January 6, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## CAREERS VIDEO / TESTIMONIALS ## [ CAREERS CURRENT OPENINGS ](https://averyheights.org/career/current-openings/ "CAREERSCURRENT OPENINGS") # Employment Benefits ## Helping You Achieve Your Personal and Professional Goals At Avery Heights, we’re proud to support our employees with a comprehensive benefits package designed to help you maintain personal and professional fulfillment. ### Benefits for Full-Time & Part-Time Plus Employees (30+ hours/week): - Health Insurance - Dental Insurance - Vision Insurance - Basic Life, Voluntary Life, and AD&D Insurance - (FSA) Flexible Spending Account - (DCA) Dependent Care Account - (HSA) Health Savings Account - (STD) Short-Term Disability - (LTD) Long-Term Disability - Employee Assistance Program (EAP) - Paid Time Off (PTO) - Corporate Wellness Program - 403(b) Retirement Plan - Pension - Legal Resources - Tuition Assistance At Avery Heights, we’re committed to offering more than just a workplace. We provide resources, support, and a welcoming environment to ensure you feel empowered and valued every day. --- ### [Careers](https://averyheights.org/career/) **Published:** August 12, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ## [ CAREERS CURRENT OPENINGS ](https://averyheights.org/career/current-openings/ "CAREERSCURRENT OPENINGS") ## [ CAREERS BENEFITS ](https://averyheights.org/career/employment-benefits/ "CAREERSBENEFITS") # Careers Welcome to the Avery Heights Careers page! We are always seeking passionate and talented individuals to join our dynamic team. At Avery Heights, you’ll find a supportive and innovative environment where your skills are valued and your contributions make a meaningful impact. Whether you’re just starting your career or looking to advance to the next level, we offer a variety of opportunities that cater to diverse talents and aspirations. Explore our current openings and discover how you can be a part of our vibrant community dedicated to excellence and growth. ## [CURRENT OPENINGS](https://averyheights.org/career/current-openings/) Start The Next Chapter Of Your Life Here. [ ![tree-icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/career/current-openings/)## [CULTURAL VALUES](https://averyheights.org/career/cultural-values/) Respect – Integrity – Teamwork [ ![tree-icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/career/cultural-values/)## [BENEFITS](https://averyheights.org/employment-benefits/) Competitive Pay and Comprehensive Benefits. [ ![tree-icon](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/tree-icon-e1723492834817.png "tree-icon") ](https://averyheights.org/employment-benefits/) --- ### [Schedule a Visit](https://averyheights.org/our-location/schedule-a-visit/) **Published:** August 28, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ## Venues ### [The Heights at Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/venue/the-heights-at-avery-heights/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [Avery Height](https://averyheights.org/venue/avery-height/) **Published:** October 25, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ## Organizers ### [Siobhan](https://averyheights.org/organizer/siobhan/) **Published:** October 25, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ## Events ### [Rock Steady Boxing](https://averyheights.org/event/rock-steady-boxing/2026-08-25/) **Published:** August 20, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** **When:** Every Tuesday | 1:30 PM – 2:30 PM **Where:** Thompson Room, The Heights at Avery Heights **Cost:** Free and open to the community Registration is required Email **** or call **[860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403** for more information or to reserve your spot. --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/event/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering-8/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us for our meaningful and uplifting book club. Our current reading is *Living with Parkinson’s* by Steve Yellen. This inspiring guide introduces **seven empowering strategies** designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s—and those who support them—navigate the journey with strength, confidence, and purpose. Through shared conversation, reflection, and connection, this group provides a supportive space to explore each strategy, gain practical tools, and build community with others who understand the journey. *(One Chapter Per Quarter – First Month of Each Quarter) - **April 6, 2028** *Chapter 7: Research – Help Advance the Science* *Conclusion: Live the Journey with Positivity* **About the Book** *Living with Parkinson’s* blends personal experience with practical guidance, offering strategies that empower individuals and care partners to take an active role in managing Parkinson’s. Each chapter focuses on a key area—from mindset and knowledge to wellness, advocacy, and research—encouraging a proactive and hopeful approach to the journey. **Registration Required** Please register to attend in person or receive the Zoom link. **Call:** [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 **Email:** --- ### [Parkinson's Support Group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-support-group/2026-07-01/) **Published:** July 7, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** **Parkinson’s Support Group** Connect with others who understand the Parkinson’s journey. This monthly support group offers a welcoming environment for individuals living with Parkinson’s disease, care partners, family members, and friends to share experiences, gain valuable resources, learn from guest speakers, and build meaningful connections. Whether you are newly diagnosed or have been living with Parkinson’s for years, you’ll find encouragement, education, and support in a caring community. **When:** First Wednesday of every month **Time:** 10:30 AM – 11:30 AM **Location:** The Heights at Avery Heights *All are welcome. No registration required. Parking is limited so please call for instructions.* --- ### [Dance for PD®](https://averyheights.org/event/dance-for-pd/2026-07-22/) **Published:** July 7, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Discover the power of music, movement, and community in this welcoming dance program designed specifically for individuals living with Parkinson’s disease. Led by Amy Valente of Neighborhood Music School, classes help improve balance, flexibility, coordination, and confidence—no dance experience necessary. **Registration is required** Email **** or call **[860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201) ext. 403** for more information or to reserve your spot. --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/event/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering-7/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us for our meaningful and uplifting book club. Our current reading is *Living with Parkinson’s* by Steve Yellen. This inspiring guide introduces **seven empowering strategies** designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s—and those who support them—navigate the journey with strength, confidence, and purpose. Through shared conversation, reflection, and connection, this group provides a supportive space to explore each strategy, gain practical tools, and build community with others who understand the journey. *(One Chapter Per Quarter – First Month of Each Quarter) - **January 5, 2028** *Chapter 6: Advocacy – Make Your Voice Heard* **About the Book** *Living with Parkinson’s* blends personal experience with practical guidance, offering strategies that empower individuals and care partners to take an active role in managing Parkinson’s. Each chapter focuses on a key area—from mindset and knowledge to wellness, advocacy, and research—encouraging a proactive and hopeful approach to the journey. **Registration Required** Please register to attend in person or receive the Zoom link. **Call:** [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 **Email:** --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/event/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering-5/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us for our meaningful and uplifting book club. Our current reading is *Living with Parkinson’s* by Steve Yellen. This inspiring guide introduces **seven empowering strategies** designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s—and those who support them—navigate the journey with strength, confidence, and purpose. Through shared conversation, reflection, and connection, this group provides a supportive space to explore each strategy, gain practical tools, and build community with others who understand the journey. *(One Chapter Per Quarter – First Month of Each Quarter) - **July 7, 2027** *Chapter 4: Fight – Make Exercise Your Medicine* **About the Book** *Living with Parkinson’s* blends personal experience with practical guidance, offering strategies that empower individuals and care partners to take an active role in managing Parkinson’s. Each chapter focuses on a key area—from mindset and knowledge to wellness, advocacy, and research—encouraging a proactive and hopeful approach to the journey. **Registration Required** Please register to attend in person or receive the Zoom link. **Call:** [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 **Email:** --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/event/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering-6/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us for our meaningful and uplifting book club. Our current reading is *Living with Parkinson’s* by Steve Yellen. This inspiring guide introduces **seven empowering strategies** designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s—and those who support them—navigate the journey with strength, confidence, and purpose. Through shared conversation, reflection, and connection, this group provides a supportive space to explore each strategy, gain practical tools, and build community with others who understand the journey. *(One Chapter Per Quarter – First Month of Each Quarter) - **October 6, 2027** *Chapter 5: Wellness – Be Your Best Self* **About the Book** *Living with Parkinson’s* blends personal experience with practical guidance, offering strategies that empower individuals and care partners to take an active role in managing Parkinson’s. Each chapter focuses on a key area—from mindset and knowledge to wellness, advocacy, and research—encouraging a proactive and hopeful approach to the journey. **Registration Required** Please register to attend in person or receive the Zoom link. **Call:** [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 **Email:** --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/event/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering-4/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us for our meaningful and uplifting book club. Our current reading is *Living with Parkinson’s* by Steve Yellen. This inspiring guide introduces **seven empowering strategies** designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s—and those who support them—navigate the journey with strength, confidence, and purpose. Through shared conversation, reflection, and connection, this group provides a supportive space to explore each strategy, gain practical tools, and build community with others who understand the journey. *(One Chapter Per Quarter – First Month of Each Quarter) - **April 7, 2027** *Chapter 3: Support – Build and Strengthen Your Team* **About the Book** *Living with Parkinson’s* blends personal experience with practical guidance, offering strategies that empower individuals and care partners to take an active role in managing Parkinson’s. Each chapter focuses on a key area—from mindset and knowledge to wellness, advocacy, and research—encouraging a proactive and hopeful approach to the journey. **Registration Required** Please register to attend in person or receive the Zoom link. **Call:** [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 **Email:** --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/event/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us for our meaningful and uplifting book club. Our current reading is *Living with Parkinson’s* by Steve Yellen. This inspiring guide introduces **seven empowering strategies** designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s—and those who support them—navigate the journey with strength, confidence, and purpose. Through shared conversation, reflection, and connection, this group provides a supportive space to explore each strategy, gain practical tools, and build community with others who understand the journey. *(One Chapter Per Quarter – First Month of Each Quarter) - **October 7, 2026** *Chapter 1: Attitude – Prepare to Win Your Battle* **About the Book** *Living with Parkinson’s* blends personal experience with practical guidance, offering strategies that empower individuals and care partners to take an active role in managing Parkinson’s. Each chapter focuses on a key area—from mindset and knowledge to wellness, advocacy, and research—encouraging a proactive and hopeful approach to the journey. **Registration Required** Please register to attend in person or receive the Zoom link. **Call:** [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201), ext. 403 **Email:** --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/event/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering-3/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us for our meaningful and uplifting book club. Our current reading is *Living with Parkinson’s* by Steve Yellen. This inspiring guide introduces **seven empowering strategies** designed to help individuals living with Parkinson’s—and those who support them—navigate the journey with strength, confidence, and purpose. Through shared conversation, reflection, and connection, this group provides a supportive space to explore each strategy, gain practical tools, and build community with others who understand the journey. *(One Chapter Per Quarter – First Month of Each Quarter) - **January 6, 2027** *Chapter 2: Knowledge – Take Control Through Learning* **About the Book** *Living with Parkinson’s* blends personal experience with practical guidance, offering strategies that empower individuals and care partners to take an active role in managing Parkinson’s. Each chapter focuses on a key area—from mindset and knowledge to wellness, advocacy, and research—encouraging a proactive and hopeful approach to the journey. --- ### [WORSHIP NIGHT Oct 2025](https://averyheights.org/event/worship-night-oct-25/) **Published:** September 24, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Registration Now ## **Worship Night with Heart Movement** *An Evening of Prayer, Music, Fellowship & Refreshments* Join us for a powerful and uplifting Worship Night led by **Heart Movement**, a passionate group dedicated to creating space for authentic worship and connection. This special evening will be filled with: - **Live Worship Music** that stirs the soul - **Prayer** for personal renewal and community healing - **Fellowship** with old and new friends - **Refreshments** to enjoy and share together Whether you’re seeking peace, inspiration, or simply a night to reconnect with God and others, this event is open to all. Come as you are and experience the heart of worship. Let’s gather, lift our voices, and move together in faith. --- ### [WORSHIP NIGHT](https://averyheights.org/event/worship-night/) **Published:** July 21, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** [](https://averyheights.org/worship-night/#form) Registration Now ## **Worship Night with Heart Movement** *An Evening of Prayer, Music, Fellowship & Refreshments* Join us for a powerful and uplifting Worship Night led by **Heart Movement**, a passionate group dedicated to creating space for authentic worship and connection. This special evening will be filled with: - **Live Worship Music** that stirs the soul - **Prayer** for personal renewal and community healing - **Fellowship** with old and new friends - **Refreshments** to enjoy and share together Whether you’re seeking peace, inspiration, or simply a night to reconnect with God and others, this event is open to all. Come as you are and experience the heart of worship. Let’s gather, lift our voices, and move together in faith. --- ### [Designer Bag Bingo](https://averyheights.org/event/designer-bag-bingo/) **Published:** March 26, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Designer Bag Bingo](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/The-Heights-DBB-Flyer-Apr25_1-232x300.webp "The Heights - DBB Flyer - Apr25_1 - Avery Heights")Designer Bag Bingo ## Benefiting the American Parkinson Disease Association Connecticut Chapter Join us for an amazing time of delicious appetizers, refreshments, wine, and fabulous door prizes. Refreshments are included and bingo cards are $20 each. Hosted by The Heights at Avery Heights **The Adams Room** 550 Avery Heights, Hartford, CT 06106 Date | April 30, 2025 Time | 4pm – 6pm **Space is Limited. Please RSVP by April 28,2025** For more information or to reserve your spot, contact Siobhan Mattingly or [860-953-1201](tel:+18609531201) [The Heights – DBB Flyer – Apr25](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/The-Heights-DBB-Flyer-Apr25.pdf) [**Register Today**](https://www.eventbrite.com/e/designer-bag-bingo-tickets-1319033136619?aff=oddtdtcreator) --- ### [Ask the Doctor with Dr. Duarte Machado](https://averyheights.org/event/ask-the-doctor-with-dr-duarte-machado/) **Published:** July 15, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Join us to have the opportunity to ask questions related to Parkinson’s symptoms, medications, and more! Learn how you can best manage life with the diagnosis from a leading movement disorder specialist. **Registration is required**. Call Siobhan at [(860) 215-3162](tel:+18602153162) or or [register here](https://averyheights.org/ask-the-doctor-with-dr-duarte-machado/). --- ### [2025 Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic](https://averyheights.org/event/2025-avery-heights-fall-golf-classic/) **Published:** June 30, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is not just an event—it’s a celebration of community spirit, resilience, and support. By participating, you’re helping us sustain our mission to provide exceptional care and dignified living for seniors, making a tangible difference in countless lives. We look forward to welcoming you to the green and sharing a day of joy, laughter, and impact. For more information, please contact Doreen Baldoni at 860-527-9126, ext. 362, or fill out the form on this page. See you there! ## Experience the Legacy of Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic The Avery Heights Fall Golf Classic is more than just a day on the greens—it’s a celebration of community, camaraderie, and a shared commitment to supporting a vital mission. This annual event, held on Wednesday, September 24, 2025, at the picturesque Tunxis Plantation Country Club in Farmington, CT, invites you to be part of something bigger. For over 60 years, Avery Heights has been a beacon of compassionate care and dignified living for seniors. By participating in this golf classic, you’re contributing to a legacy that’s helped countless individuals live their best lives. Whether you’re a seasoned golfer or new to the sport, this is an opportunity to make a difference while enjoying a beautiful day outdoors. --- ### [Parkinson’s Caregiver Support Group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-6/) **Published:** January 7, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Are you interested in learning more about Parkinson’s disease (PD) and connecting with other people who have PD and their Care Partners? Participating in a support group is a wonderful way to receive practical information and education on living with Parkinson’s disease. More importantly, members receive the support of others who truly understand. We warmly welcome you joining us. **Event Categories:** Support Groups --- ### [Parkinson’s Caregiver Support Group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-5/) **Published:** January 7, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Are you interested in learning more about Parkinson’s disease (PD) and connecting with other people who have PD and their Care Partners? Participating in a support group is a wonderful way to receive practical information and education on living with Parkinson’s disease. More importantly, members receive the support of others who truly understand. We warmly welcome you joining us. **Event Categories:** Support Groups --- ### [Parkinson’s Caregiver Support Group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-4/) **Published:** January 7, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Are you interested in learning more about Parkinson’s disease (PD) and connecting with other people who have PD and their Care Partners? Participating in a support group is a wonderful way to receive practical information and education on living with Parkinson’s disease. More importantly, members receive the support of others who truly understand. We warmly welcome you joining us. **Event Categories:** Support Groups --- ### [Parkinson’s Caregiver Support Group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-3/) **Published:** January 7, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Are you interested in learning more about Parkinson’s disease (PD) and connecting with other people who have PD and their Care Partners? Participating in a support group is a wonderful way to receive practical information and education on living with Parkinson’s disease. More importantly, members receive the support of others who truly understand. We warmly welcome you joining us. **Event Categories:** Support Groups --- ### [Parkinson’s Caregiver Support Group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group-2/) **Published:** January 7, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Are you interested in learning more about Parkinson’s disease (PD) and connecting with other people who have PD and their Care Partners? Participating in a support group is a wonderful way to receive practical information and education on living with Parkinson’s disease. More importantly, members receive the support of others who truly understand. We warmly welcome you joining us. **Event Categories:** Support Groups --- ### [Parkinson’s Caregiver Support Group](https://averyheights.org/event/parkinsons-caregiver-support-group/) **Published:** January 7, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Are you interested in learning more about Parkinson’s disease (PD) and connecting with other people who have PD and their Care Partners? Participating in a support group is a wonderful way to receive practical information and education on living with Parkinson’s disease. More importantly, members receive the support of others who truly understand. We warmly welcome you joining us. **Event Categories:** Support Groups --- ### [Open House](https://averyheights.org/event/open-house/) **Published:** October 25, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Avery Heights—creating memories with loved ones and their families since 1957. What sets our senior living community apart is that we put healthcare first. For over 50 years, our staff has gained a solid reputation for providing seamless care and convenient living—all for a great value. At Avery Heights, we’re committed to protecting our communities with safety measures that adhere to CDC, state, and local guidelines. --- ## Meet our Residents ### [Laura Mae Knott-Twine - The Heights Resident Spotlight](https://averyheights.org/meet-our-residents/laura-mae-knott-twine/) **Published:** December 3, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Laura Mae Knott-Twine
](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/Laura-Mae-Knott-Twine-240x300.jpg "Laura Mae Knott-Twine - Avery Heights") Laura Mae Knott-Twine is a remarkable woman and yet another fascinating person who makes life at Avery Heights a delight. Residing in one of the adorable cottages, one can see upon entering her home where magic awaits. Within, one experiences some of the finest handwoven fabrics, most of them hand-crafted by her nimble hands. The colors, the designs, and the intricacy of her artistic work are simply astounding. It is no wonder she excelled in this chosen craft. Laura is an entrepreneur who turned her every interest into a business or employment. Over the years, she owned and operated a Weaving Studio selling her works, teaching handweaving, spinning and sold textile equipment. She also founded, designed, and was Executive Director of the Windham Textile and History Museum, Inc. In October 2023, Laura moved into a cottage at Avery Heights, a community that provides her with many friends and interesting activities such as lectures, games, delicious dinners in the restaurant, a movie theater and store, musical performances, gardening in a beautiful neighborhood setting, a theater group, off-site trips, and more. She serves on several committees: Senior Seminars, the Avery Heights Independent Living Programs Committee, and as a volunteer at the in-house Avery Heights Library as computer support. Laura often shares her appreciation of the caring, professional staff and wonderful services that she has received since her arrival. Laura, the daughter of Herman and Evelyn Knott, was born in 1946 in Hartford. In 1973, she married her beloved Richard Twine, who passed away in 2006. She gets the most endearing smile on her face as she speaks of Richard and their deep love for one another. His legacy will live forever in her heart and in those whose lives he dearly touched. Their children, his boy and girl, Neil and Fiona, and her boy and girl, Edward and Susan, made up their family. Laura has three grown grandchildren: Nathan, Hana, and Lydia. After her children grew up, at 50, she bravely went back to school and earned a Bachelor of Arts in 1996. She then acquired a Master’s degree in 1998 from Norwich University in VT. For 17 Semesters, she was an Institutional Sociologist Professor in Social Sciences, American History, Business, and Organizational Management at Union Institute & University in Vermont. Laura’s other interests took her down many interesting paths: Field Executive and Parliamentarian for CT Trails Council of Girls Scouts; Founding Director of the Small Business Administration (SBA) Office of Women’s Business Ownership at the University of Hartford; Executive Director of the Hartford Preservation Alliance; Preservationist and Project Manager in the restoration of a historic 1860 Textile Mill in Vernon, CT. She retired in July of 2017 at 71. Laura remains forever grateful for these blessings and experiences. --- ### [Volunteer Spotlight: Carol & Barbara—The Dynamic Duo of the Avery Heights Gift Shop!](https://averyheights.org/meet-our-residents/volunteer-spotlight-carol-barbara-the-dynamic-duo-of-the-avery-heights-gift-shop/) **Published:** April 24, 2025 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** ![Volunteer Spotlight](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/The-Villager-volunteers--300x200.jpg "The Villager volunteers - Avery Heights")Carol & Barbara Step into The Villager at Avery Heights Gift Shop, and you’ll likely be greeted by the warm smiles and quick wit of Carol and Barbara—two dedicated volunteers who bring energy, laughter, and a welcoming spirit to the community. Barbara, a resident of the cottages for seven years, is a natural people person. “I just love meeting everyone,” she says with a twinkle in her eye. Originally from the [West Hartford area](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/West_Hartford,_Connecticut), she and Carol have shared years of friendly chatter at the same salon, so naturally, their camaraderie shines through the shop. Barbara is always on the go, whether she’s enjoying a workout at the gym, playing a lively round of bingo, or unwinding at Happy Hour with friends. Carol, who joined the Avery Heights community a year ago, is equally enthusiastic. “It’s the people that make this place so special,” she says. “The staff are wonderful, and that kindness spills over into how we all treat each other.” Originally from Rocky Hill and West Hartford, Carol feels immense gratitude knowing her husband is in a place where he receives top-notch care. And then, of course, there’s the shop itself—a treasure trove of seasonal gifts and charming finds, expertly curated by Theresa and Lori. “It’s always a joy to see what new little delights show up,” Carol says. “There’s something for everyone, and it makes shopping here such fun!” Whether they’re ringing up a purchase, sharing a laugh, or simply making someone’s day a little brighter, Carol and Barbara bring an irreplaceable spark to Avery Heights. Next time you’re in the shop, stop by, say hello, and enjoy a little bit of their magic! For more information: [The Villager – Avery Heights](https://averyheights.org/shop/) --- ## podcasts ### [It’s Time to Be (Self) Centered](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/its-time-to-be-self-centered/) **Published:** July 11, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** F50Woman is all about taking the risk and the steps to live “your next chapter”. Owner and founder of F50Woman, Julia Jack joins us to discuss her journey that lead her to create the company. We learn a new mindset that can empower us through the years as we begin our journey of Facing 50 and beyond… https://f50woman.com/30-days-of-discomfort-challenge ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Welcome to your next chapter. This is a production of the Heights at Avery Heights. My name is Siobhan Mattingly and I’m the Senior Living Specialist and I have an awesome guest here today. Julia, welcome. Julia Jack. Thank you so much. I’m so glad to be here. I’m good. Speaker 2 Yeah. So tell me, who is Julia Jack? Julia Jack, first and foremost, is a woman chasing after God. So I’m a Christian, a disciple of Jesus Christ. Secondly, I am a wife and I am working to try to be a wife and a mother that God would be proud of in the end. I’m a mother of five children in a blended family. So, you know, that really taught me how to love in a different way. You know, not just loving children because they come from your womb, but loving children because they were gifted to you and put under your care and trust. And that’s been amazing because I think children, you know, my two sons that are stepchildren, they have their mom. Their mom is close by. She’s not invisible. She didn’t pass away. So you go through a period of competing as a mom, you know, wondering if they’re going to love you as much as they love the other mom. So in that, I’ve learned that you love first and you get back whatever you get back. But loving first is the most important thing. and uh then um I am a daughter uh a sister and hopefully a good friend and you know in all those areas I’m just really praying that I can be the best of each one of those that I can be so and uh I’m an architect by trade so that’s what I do for a living and um a woman mom yeah that’s Speaker 1 me. Yeah. Yeah. That’s awesome. I love it. I love the five kids and I should, full disclosure, Julia and I are friends. Yes. I feel like we’re Oprah and Gail right now. Yes. Or I can pretend I don’t know. So who is Julia? Yeah, I know. Who are you? I know all the answers. I know you’re thinking, yeah, yeah, yeah. Check, check, check. Yep. Yes. Yes. Yeah. awesome though. So tell me about facing 50 women. Both of us are in our 50s. We’ve known each other 20 plus years. Yes. Actually awesome. It is a different kind of friendship when you’ve known each other that long and kind of gone through the roller coaster. But tell me about facing 50 women. Speaker 2 Okay. What is it? F50. F50 women. Yes. I love that. F50 women. Yes. Yeah. I would love to. So it started? Can I? Yeah, yeah. So around my 49th year, 49th year, I was in a career in architecture and I had been working for 20 something years and I was frustrated that I was trying so hard. You know, if there are opportunities at work, I would volunteer. If there are extra stuff to do, I would volunteer. I’d raise my hand. I’d try to new jobs. I tried everything, but I felt like I was just on a treadmill getting nowhere. And my marriage was frustrating. I felt like we were hitting up against the same walls. I was banging my head against the same wall and I was getting sick and tired of that. And then shortly after my dad’s 79th birthday, he just literally dropped dead. You know, this was a man who was sharp. He was smart. He was sort of my idol as a young girl growing up. My dad was the smartest, the most, the one in control. He had the control. and I wanted to be like my dad, which is another challenge as well. But because he was so sharp at 79, I thought, I literally thought he was going to live forever. I had been taking care of him for about five years. If you saw his body, you would know something was going on because he was in a wheelchair most of the time. But his mind and the way he talked and the way he read, he was still teaching himself languages. You know, one day I came down and he was going, you, she, she, and I thought, I thought he was, I thought Alzheimer’s, I, sorry, I thought something was going wrong with his mind. Come to find out he’s teaching himself Japanese. You know, this is, sorry, my light’s going off. Hello. So this was a man who was sharp. And so when he just passed away that night after we had been sharing stories, I was just like, I don’t, I don’t know what this means. I don’t know where to go. And so, um, you know, he, I, like I said, he was 79 years old. I was just about to be 50. And I said to myself, 79 is not that far from 50. You know, the first 50 years went by like lightning. And so I only have, if I, if I get to live as long as him, What am I going to do with my life? That’s not very far from here. So, you know, having been frustrated with my career and my marriage and I was really ready to just be done with architecture. I had I decided I was going to do something simple and sweet. And I don’t know, I don’t want to disrespect it because, you know, sales is hard. Yes. But I was going to go out and I was going to sell jewelry or makeup, something a little less male dominated. Speaker 1 Let me just put it that way. Speaker 2 And, but then I look back and I said to myself, you know, I have been in this career of architecture for over 20 years. And so if I leave the room that I was able to build or get into people, younger people, women, single mothers, working mothers, minority people, whoever had been through the experience I had been and want to be in that room, I would not be able to let them in because I would no longer be there. So at that point, I decided to go back, get my architectural license because at 49, I still didn’t get it. Had tried a couple of times. I failed. I quit. This time, I said, I’m going to go back to get it with a different purpose. This is not so I can be glorified. So I can say, walk into a room, say, I’m an architect. Look at me. Hey, you know, Speaker 1 you want to hang out with me. I actually do that with people. I, when I bring up you, just, just so you know. So I do that for you. Right. My best friend’s an architect. Yes, that’s a perk. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Just so you know. Yeah. Speaker 2 So, but the purpose was different. So, you know, I sat down and I got the, there were seven exams. You know, I failed one once. I went back, got the other one. So within the eight months, I got those exams. I finished it and became a licensed architect with the purpose of helping someone else get to where I am. And so all of those different things built up to F50 Women. and the purpose of that, I mean, it’s sort of a long-winded story. So forgive me if I keep going on. As I was going through this process of trying to figure out who I am and why am I here? What’s the point? What’s the point of all this? There’s got to be a bigger point to it. I sort of put myself through, well, let me take you back. I was asked at one point to write my biography for an organization for women in transportation, transportation engineers. And so when I went through that exercise, I actually, instead of just writing a regular biography, I thought to myself, let me try to figure out who I was, where I had been. And so I ended up writing sort of a little short story about who I was. And through that, which I won’t take you through that whole story, I’d love to take you through that whole story some other time. But basically, I came up with personal brand statement is what I call it. And so that is that I am the daughter of diversity here to change the world one woman at a time by helping everyone I meet to build unshakable character and do extraordinary things. So that’s my personal brand statement. And it’s sort of the F50 woman purpose is that I want other women to at 50 and beyond to recognize and look at their story, understand why you’re here and let the next decade or two or three or how many ever you’re gifted to have, which we know 50 and beyond is can be tenuous. You never know. I want you to take it to your highest level and not for you alone, but for whoever or whatever purpose is beyond yourself. So that’s basically in a nutshell, quickly, what F50 woman is all about. Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah. That’s amazing. I think, I think for myself, you know, being a woman that’s over 50, I think about, for some reason, it comes to mind, this mind I didn’t even pertain, but like Rosa parks i feel like she i love her and she popped into my mind a lot here’s this woman that made a slight decision and and really if you hear the story it really wasn’t she didn’t wake up that day and say no i’m going to change the world yes she didn’t she just decided nope and and and it’s like her purpose it’s it’s she i mean she opened up yes words and i mean i don’t think she realizes you know, at the time or, you know, whatever, what that decision was going to do. And I feel like as, yeah, I think, you know, I feel like my, our journeys are very similar in terms of, you know, being a woman, having blended family, you know, that I had that moment as well that, you know, for being like Oprah, that aha moment as well, where it was like, I don’t want to be in sales anymore. I was going to be a personal trainer. I was going to be an author and all these things I was going to be. And then all of a sudden it just clicked to me. I just didn’t like where I was doing sales and marketing. Right. And so now I’m in, you know, here at the Heights, senior living specialist. I’m back. Like my favorite job was this role. It just wasn’t the right fit for me. And now I’m here and I absolutely love it. And I feel like this is where I’m supposed to be. And I feel like I can do a lot of good here. You know, when I see my favorite moment is seeing people in the dining room after they’ve moved in and they’re there and, and they’re sitting with friends, they’re enjoying themselves. And I walk by and it’s like, it’s, it’s almost like, I feel like they’re, they’re oblivious to all the steps that had to happen to get here. Cause a lot of times the family doing it and they’re just, they’re alive, you know, they’re at a concert, they’re doing what they got to do. And so for me, I feel like this is my purpose. I, all my skills play into what I’m doing right now. And so I feel like I’m doing kind of, and it’s the same thing. It’s like that same realization of, do I leave this arena? You know, even though there are women that do this, but are there enough women in this case, women of color of diversity that do this? There are several times where I’m in a room and I’m the only person of color. And it’s like, do I leave this room that I’ve been able to make that headway? Again, not like Rosa Parks, by no means. I mean, that’s still kind of like leading that charge. You know, I’m in an executive position and, you know, I look around the room. I’m really the only person of color that’s in the exec. When I’m in those staff meetings, it’s me. You know, there’s other minorities. There’s someone from, you know, different cultures and different things and there’s other women, but there’s not. So it’s so it is important. And then our role in life, just like with our kids, is not just to be, you know, think about me, you know, as you get older. It’s like, yeah, what you know, now we’re we’re the wise ones. We’re that wisdom. We’re supposed to be the wisdom that when you read your, you know, we’re both Christians. And so when you read the Bible, we’re the wisdom, you know, that wisdom. We’re supposed to be those in and not that I ever served, but you know what I mean? Hey, I do. And the other, it’s about, it’s about what, you know, what am I representing? What am I, on a daily basis, who am I touching? And what are the seeds that I’m planting that’s out there? And I feel like that’s absolutely. And that’s where the reason why I wanted to have you on is because, you know, you’re all about your next chapter. This is our next, this, you know, this is, you know, we had our first chapters probably, you know, it’s probably every, you know, generation When we were 10, we were in our 20s, we were in our 30s. Everyone is the next chapter. But this literally is our next chapters. And it’s like, it’s not over. And there are people that are older that come to us that I do tours for. And it’s just like, they’re just sitting at home. And it’s like watching TV. It’s like, wait, you’re still here. And here, I feel like it gives people an opportunity to have that next chapter. They’re not only impacting me. They impact the staff. They impact, you know, the young people that come in to perform, they, you know, the people around them. And it’s like, it’s the, it gives you an opportunity to continue to live your purpose. So I love this organization. I love what you’re doing on your website. And that’s what I love about this is like, I get to know people, but then I get to like delve into their Facebook and their websites and on your website, you write, it’s time to be self-centered. And what do you mean by that? And, you know, asking this question is because I know you don’t mean it like it reads. It’s not like the whatever, the me generation. It’s not about that. What do you mean by that? It’s time to be self-centered. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah, that’s true. It is nothing about the YouTube selfie. Right. And that we’re in. Everybody’s got them on. You know, all the different. No more duck lips, though. Speaker 1 That’s what I’ve done for my daughter. No one’s doing duck lips anymore. That’s what she’s. I don’t know what to do it. No one’s doing it. I don’t know what they’re doing anymore, Speaker 2 honestly, but I try to keep up. But yeah, being self-centered is not a self-centered or selfish thing, but it’s being, what’s the word I’m looking for? Having your, what is that thing that you pivot around? The center, I guess. What’s another word for center? I don’t know. The axis? yes straightening your axis axis axis a x i s yes paying attention right yes within yourself so that then you can affect the world from being balanced yes you know i i think and especially in this in this generation where everybody’s got an opinion everybody’s can anybody can have a youtube channel anybody can be a specialist in anything um there are a lot of those thought leader right yeah thought leader thought leaders and some of those thought leaders are crooked yeah not crooked in terms of bad but crooked in terms of lopsided or your intention too Speaker 1 it’s like you know in starting in starting um because i had a organization women with purpose but then starting that my purpose was to make money yeah so i’m off it’s like right working Because it’s like, I tried stuff, it wasn’t making money, so I stopped doing it. Yes. It’s not, you know, that’s not what we needed to do. I needed to have my purpose. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 And then I’ll get taken care of. Yes. Speaker 2 And then everything else would, yes. Speaker 1 Everything’s going to follow that. If you’re leading with the wrong thing, it’s off. You know, if you want people to stare at you, if you’re being a motivational speaker, since you’re up on the stage, it’s not going to work because, you know, you’re thinking too much of what I look like, how that sounds. Yeah. Yeah. Are they going to pay attention? Do they like me? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 And so that process you even went through, and I know I went through where you’re, you’re thinking about doing something else, you know, let me see how I can make money or maybe I’ll do something else. And then you come back and realize who you are, where you’ve been, what you’re good at, what your passion is, and that you’re going to find a place to do that thing versus trying to fit yourself into the place. Exactly. And then that’s what self-centered does. And it’s almost like a guidepost. You know, the personal brand statement I mentioned, whenever I start getting, you know, you can start drifting because the world tells you one thing, you start thinking, oh, I can go over here and make some money. Speaker 1 Or I can do this over here. Speaker 2 Maybe I’ll just, you know, even recently I was thinking, maybe I’ll get into IT. They make so much more money than me. But then what’s the point? Then I’m lost again. So then I just come back to that statement and say, I know exactly what I’m here for. And I’m not going to change because, you know, anyone listening and you you Siobhan know if you believe in any forces that are meant for not your good yeah um they’re always trying to be distracted from the purpose that you’re here for and so that is what being self-centered means there’s always a center around which you’re doing everything and then you understand you know every every post you put on Facebook every and I’m saying that because you know this is a Facebook, YouTube, Instagram generation. Everything you put on Instagram, every conversation you have at work inside your home, it is all with that same purpose of why you’re here. Exactly. You know even as people of blended families, I don’t know if younger people would be listening to this. If you end up in a blended family or if you’re adopt or if you get divorced and married again. You will be able to love and give and withstand a marriage that might be hard when you understand why you are here. What’s your purpose? Yeah, it’d be easier to change your job. Yeah, it’d be easier to change your husband. Yeah, it’d be easier just to tell your kids to get out and go on, move on with your life. You’re making my life too hard. But then at the end, what did it add up to? You didn’t learn anything. You didn’t grow. You didn’t help anyone else grow you just walk through life crooked and i think a lot of times you know we spend so much Speaker 1 time i know i’ve spent as much time chasing happiness you know it’s you know uh been married three times you know it’s like what do you what do you do you know you you keep trying to think this is new you know this is new this is new this is new but the the one thing that’s not new is me yes it’s like okay we always follow ourselves yeah stop trying to change the world yes let me change me and by changing me i will change the world yes you know it just you know the whole michael jackson make that change look at the man in there i love that song because it’s so true it’s that song has so much depth it’s like i need to change me yes changing this it’ll change all Speaker 2 around me you’ll be amazed when you do that how the world starts shifting around you i’m not telling you that wars are going to stop and i think the world’s wars would stop if we all did that but Speaker 1 well it’s a scene throughout the day i know that like you know when you’re driving out to work and someone’s beeping or someone beeps the horn it just changes your day yeah if you let it if you let if you let it realize that then you go to work and then you snap at somebody yeah that person said And it’s a trickle. So in a way, maybe it will stop a war. Maybe that somehow that that little goodness that you’re passing along will get some higher up that’ll go. Speaker 2 Yeah. Let me share a story along those lines. I was at a gas station. Sorry, everyone. I was on the phone with my husband. I had the air police in. I wasn’t on the phone like this, but I was on the phone with him and I was backing up, getting out of a parking space. Someone was trying to get my space. So I wasn’t looking behind. I was looking at them. And so I back slowly into another gentleman who was trying to get his car jumped behind me. And it was a gentle bump, but it was an obvious bump. I moved forward to try to get out of the way this car that was parking. And the guy in the car behind that I hit, he started walking after me, started getting a little bit angry because he thought I was going to drive away. Wow. I got out of the car and I was like, I’m so sorry. I, you know, I wasn’t looking, I apologize. You know, did I hurt your car? He was like, yeah, well, I was, I was going to say for a minute, cause I thought you were going to walk away and he was, you know, he was about to get frustrated, but I was just like, no, I’m not going to drive away. Is everything okay? And so he came down. Yeah. You know, so if I got out of the car, like, what are you yelling at me for? What’s going on? Speaker 1 You know, that’s the situation. Yes. We have, we have the power to diffuse situations. We do. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. And I feel like when you become self-centered and you know who you are and why you’re here and what you’re about, that you don’t have to let the world affect you. Yeah. Because whether he is mad or not mad or had a bad, it does. That’s not my problem. It’s not my issue. I know who I am. Right. So, yeah, it really does affect the world. Yeah. Speaker 1 We’ll get back to F50 women. Okay. I could chat about this stuff. I don’t. I don’t. Right. We can go down that rabbit hole. That is for sure. So tell me about the podcast. Yes. So the podcast, the idea with that is that Speaker 2 women who are 50 and over oftentimes have gone through this whole cycle that we’ve gone through of, you know, challenge and, and, and recovery, let’s just call it that. And they figured some things out. And so I know there’s nothing more powerful than a true, real lived story. I know generations ago, we used to sit with our grandmas and hear about their lives and grandfathers. We don’t really do that so much anymore. I do. I have like hundreds of them. And you see that, and it’s such a blessing. We put them all over in corners and don’t realize there’s one thing that we can’t get, and that’s experience in life, living life. Age is the only thing that can give that to you and it gives you a wisdom that books just can’t express. Nope. And, uh, so I started that to, to allow a place for women 50 and over to tell their stories, what they’ve learned, where they’ve come from, who they were and who they’re trying to be. Um, and so that’s where the, that’s what the podcast was meant to, was meant to do. And those are not just on your website. Speaker 1 Those are on kind of Apple and yes. Speaker 2 Yeah. All the podcasts, wherever you can find your podcasts. Yeah. Speaker 1 We’re going to have a link with this so that people will click on the link. Speaker 2 Okay. Speaker 1 So I should have wore it today. I wasn’t even thinking. And today’s dressed down. The t-shirt. I think I have a picture though. So I’ll probably put that up with me. Speaker 2 Right. Yes. Speaker 1 But yes. So tell me about your merchandise. And then we’re going to talk about your community outreach, which I absolutely love as well. Speaker 2 Okay. Well, so the merchandise I have right now is a t-shirt that says F50 woman. Speaker 1 Yep. Speaker 2 You know, hopefully we’ll talk about what’s coming up next, but I have a lot of ideas. Speaker 1 Tank tops. Speaker 2 But yeah, you can get a tank top. And I’m not sure how to relay it right now. Right now, the t-shirt says F50 woman. Some of them say because we’re not done yet. Speaker 1 Which is I love. Speaker 2 I’ve got both. Yes. Because we’re not done yet. I think we get become fit. We get to 50 and beyond and we think, you know, we’ve done it. We’re settled. Let’s see what we can, when we can retire, but there’s so much more to do. Yep. So that’s what I have in terms of merchandise. What was the next question? The community outreach. Community outreach. So Habitat for Humanity is my favorite and favored organization. Why is that? Well, I know, right? I wonder. Speaker 1 Is this about something you do? Yes. Yes. It coincides with architecture. Yes. So that’s why Speaker 2 I first got involved because I said, you know, I sit behind the desk doing a lot of drawing and management and all that stuff with architecture, but with Habitat, you get to get out on site and actually build stuff, which I love doing. I love getting dirty. I love swinging the hammer. Yeah. But the more I got involved with the organization, I realized that it’s like a cycle. So what happens is you come in, if you want to be a homeowner, you can request to be in the pool to receive a home. In that, you go through a cycle of financial training. They have social workers and they put you through a cycle to help you to be a better homeowner. I’ll just say a better homeowner. Go to their website, understand more detail or actually get involved and build and they’ll tell you all about it. But then when the person gets picked to get a home, they have to put in work hours in somebody else’s home to help build it before they get theirs. And so and then when they get the home, there are people who help them to continue to pay their mortgage, to help them with their families, whatever challenges they have. And then when you get the mortgage, it’s not a conventional loan. So it’s not something that you won’t be able to pay off because, you know, the funds come from them. And then it’s just it feels like the volunteers volunteer and the volunteers get to understand more. And then architects get involved to donate their services and builders donate materials. It’s a holistic program that helps everyone involved. I just absolutely love it. Speaker 1 I love the fact that it teaches you. It’s one of the things in this world that I noticed that we don’t learn stuff like how to be a homeowner, how to pay our bills. No. You know, even to some extent, you know, how to be a parent. Like if we’re proactive, we’ll read up and do our own research. Yes. There’s no like to teach you, even like to be a boss or a manager. And these are things that somehow we’re just supposed to know. and I don’t I don’t believe in that anymore I believe you know I try to teach my daughter uh Bella um 14 you know I try to teach her you know she always gets frustrated because she doesn’t know how to do something and then I stop her I’m like hang on didn’t you just start this you know didn’t you just start to learn this yeah pressure that the world puts on us is that we’re just supposed to know stuff yes it’s not true it’s like you have to and if you don’t know it people will tease you and there’s peer pressure and it’s like oh you don’t know how to do that I was like, no, no one, no one taught me how to do this. At some point, for some reason, someone believes that parenting should stop. But we really have to parent ourselves at that point and really have to like either ask someone to teach us or this program, which is great. I mean, you know, I look back at how to be a homeowner when I got my house. It’s like, I don’t know what I was doing and how to do it. And, you know, now I have a budget and all this stuff that I have. And like, that goes back to what you’re saying, that, that face, you know, the FME, F50 woman has that wisdom, you know, that, that knowledge and how to do stuff. And it’s, and it’s okay to ask. And, you know, a lot of times younger, younger people, because I was a younger person and I know me, I don’t want to ask the lady down the street who’s 90, how to do something, but you know, do that because she, she knows how to do it. You know, she, her husband probably passed away and she had to bootstrap and learn how to do it. And so I think it’s important that I think it’s, I think it’s sad. And I was talking about this in our previous episode. We were talking about a company called age, age friendly. She does greeting cards, but it’s age friendly greeting cards. We were talking about how, and more so I think in America, the United States, it’s like, you know, oil, mole, we’re slathering ourselves and we’re, you know, putting up apparatuses to flatten our stuff, all this stuff so we can stay young. And it’s like, why? Why? Let’s age. I’m not saying let yourself go and your health and so forth, but allow yourself to age. If I got a couple of wrinkles, I earned those. Yes. You know, that’s, that’s my, that’s my, you know, way of letting you know, that’s my, my advertisement of, Hey, you know, I’ve, I’ve done my, my time. And I think their 20s is trying to tell me how to do something which i’m well so they probably right stuff but there’s a lot of stuff like you said that comes with age and experience that you can’t can’t teach that you can’t teach you can’t buy who’s young can no way you can teach me how to do those things and that’s you know financials emotional stuff you know relationships uh you know uh things like that so i think that’s important so this is funny i love this 30 days of discomfort i love going into your website you know being a marketing person yes I’m like who’s buying this yes who what who would actually do that diving deeper it’s awesome I mean I I printed it I plan to do it okay you know because I’m gonna start on August 1st so I will be starting in August okay that’s my OCD I want to be first second but I do plan to do this I do hope I hope to have a couple of buddies that do it with me. Okay. It’s, it’s phenomenal. It’s, you know, so tell, tell me more about this. Tell Speaker 2 me more about 30 days of discomfort. Yeah. Well, I tell you when, when I was at that point that I talked about earlier, where I was frustrated with my job, my marriage, my, my, I was taking care of my dad and my kids. And I was just overwhelmingly frustrated and stuck. Yeah. I don’t, I just decided I’m going to try to, and I realized that, you know, this glass ceiling that they talk about, I always say that I didn’t hit a glass ceiling. I know some people do not disrespecting that, but I was hitting against a mirror and that mirror was looking back at me and I kept smashing into it and not seeing it, not looking at it. So I said, there’s something wrong with me that certain things in my life keep happening to me. So I decided to just try to do a whole bunch of things um you know spend a day of silence not talking not speaking um is that is that on this list because um I’m not sure if that’s on that list I think I may not have put that on the thing wait that one that one being a person working person that one’s hard but I will tell you that one day that I didn’t speak I actually went to work and um I it was almost like a spiritual experience. I’m not talking all day, even though you’re in, I went to a McDonald’s and, um, I had to sort of write down what I wanted to order. Cause I couldn’t, I can’t speak. He thought Speaker 1 I was deaf. He was like, what do you want? My sister-in-law does that. She, but she literally will go for like a week and she goes to like some Tibetan temple or something. And, you know, I would love to do that. Just kind of just, just nothing, you know, just say nothing. Yeah. Got to be. Yeah. I don’t, I, I don’t need to talk. I’m talking now, but I don’t need to talk all the time. I, I, the most freeing thing that I discovered is I don’t have to say everything that comes into my mind. Yes. I used to like, Oh, I gotta get this. I do not. I can like leave it on the table. I can walk away and you’re not going to die. It’d be okay. Yeah. Yeah. It’s so freeing to know I don’t have to speak. I don’t have to. Yeah. So like that, all the other different Speaker 2 challenges help you to change your mind, change your thoughts, change the way you interact with the world. Some of them in there might be, you know, saying hello to everybody you walk by or, you know, yeah. And those people who are shy, just force yourself to say hi, good afternoon. And then some people look at you like they do, especially how they look at you weird, but who cares? Yeah. Speaker 1 You know, in New England, it’s true. And I’m that way too, though. If someone’s not right, people are so friendly. Hey, how’s it going? I’m like, do I, do I know you? I don’t know in New England. Went down south to South Carolina. That’s like. Right. People in your conversation. One day I was in, we were talking about an amusement park. He was like, hang on, can I help you out? Do you mind? And I’m like, but he was very helpful and you get used to doing it. And then you come back here and you’re just like, nobody says hello to AB conversation. See you. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 I think that started in New England. I think that probably. That’s our state motto. We’re not the nutmeg state. We’re AB, you know, I love this stuff. Yes. Day silence is day four. Say sorry to someone you hurt. Turn off social media. I mean, these are, these are like things that like you want to do, you know, But you just don’t, you know, make a full meal for another family. I mean, rock or ride, you know, ride your bike to work. I mean, I’m excited because. Yes. Speaker 2 And if some of those things you can’t do, like if you work like, you know, 10, 15 miles from your home, then, you know, alter it. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 I can actually walk to work. Now, when I worked up in the Berkshire. I know that would be. I’m still trying to walk to work. It’s a week later. Speaker 1 I know I had a 10 o’clock appointment. I started at 4 a.m. Right. In this case, I can’t. And I’m sure you, like you said, you can alter it. Maybe you walk to the store. Yes. Maybe, you know, or walk to the bank, you know, you’re not walking to work, but you do something, an errand of some sort you walk to. So I’m sure, you know, you can alter it. But this is amazing. We got it. We have to wrap up. I’m going to get back on for sure. How can people learn more about what you’re doing and get your products? What’s the magic, the magic website? Speaker 2 Yes. So the website is F F as in Fred five zero woman, F 50 woman. F is Francine. F is Francine. What did I say, Fred? Speaker 1 You’re F 50 women. Yes. Right. Yeah. Francine, Fanny. I don’t know. Sorry, ladies. This is for older adults. So yes. Right. Right. Yeah. Thank you so much for, Oh, is there another way? Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 Instagram. I love to link up with me. Somehow link up with me. You know, more things are to come. Speaker 1 Yep. Speaker 2 Even this conversation gave me some ideas. I have sort of paused on the podcast for about a year now, really trying to think of how to make it meaningful to women and to people. Potentially one day, maybe God willing, we’ll have a. Should I give it away? No, I might not give it away. Next time. Speaker 1 definitely go on the website to come yeah do this 30-day challenge I plan on starting August 1st I might even document it on Facebook it’s super super awesome and I’m hoping to get some other people to do it with me but I do think it’s a good thing thank you for being here today thank you so much all of you out there have a great day as you continue your next chapter right it’s very Oprah-esque yes and now I ruined it I was just at the end with that yeah do it you have to do it again. All right. Thank you, Julia, for being here. 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This episode you will learn when… **Categories:** Healthy Aging & Wellness, Purpose, Inspiration & Positive Aging **Tags:** Healthy Aging, Purpose & Meaning, Wellness --- ### [Getting Help...](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/getting-help/) **Published:** July 18, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** In this episode you will learn what an Aging Life Care Professional is and how they can help older adults and their caregivers. Special Guest: Katie Krupka will guide through services provided and information on the process of working with an advocate and care manager. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 So, welcome to your next chapter. We are a production of The Heights at Avery Heights. I’m Siobhan Mattingly, and I’m the Senior Living Specialist. I’m talking to Katie today. Welcome, Katie. Thank you for having me. Katie is from Tuckton Elder Care, which is an awesome, awesome organization. I myself have had the great pleasure of working with you on a pretty challenging client, and you did an amazing job. And so that’s why I wanted to have you here today. And we’re really going to be talking a lot about the importance of asking for help and what better person to ask for help than a senior living specialist like yourself. Tell me about Tuckton Eldercare. So Tuckton Eldercare is a geriatric care management company. Speaker 2 It was founded by a woman named Erin Lynch, who is a gerontologist. She’s also a licensed nursing home administrator, and she was living on Nantucket and she was managing the nursing home on the island and realized there was a great need for care management services. So they would be discharging clients home and there wouldn’t be enough services and they would end up back. And it was just a cycle. And she realized that there needed to be more options for people on the So she reached out to her former colleague, Kevin Smith, who owns Best of Care, which is a home care agency in Boston, and asked if he would be interested in partnering with her. And she was able to start Tuckton Eldercare. And we’ve grown, she’s grown the company across Massachusetts. I’m in Western Mass and in Northern Connecticut helping clients. And they’re still growing throughout New England. So yeah, it’s wonderful. So we’re affiliated with Best of Care as well as Assisted Living Locators, which I also manage, as well as Moving Mentor, which is a transition moving company that helps with downsizing, organizing, and moving for seniors specifically. Speaker 1 Nice. Very nice. So that’s I love that. I love when things are it’s kind of like us. We’re a CCRC, continuing care retirement community. We’ve got it all under one roof in terms of independent assisted memory care. And then we have our skilled offering as well. And that just makes it easier for people. There’s so many communications and conversations that need to go on. And it sounds like you’ve got a nice streamline of products. And the more. Yeah. And the more you guys are communicating, that’s the key. So the people, it’s so hard to have to keep telling the story, you know? Exactly. Yeah, that’s great. That’s great. Tell me about the services. Tell me about the services for anyone. Sure. Speaker 2 So it’s kind of hard to explain what care management is and geriatric care management is because it’s kind of a lot of everything. And it’s different for each client. So we usually say, ask us what you need and we’ll tell you if we can do it. We usually, yeah, we usually figure out if we can’t. We’ll do whatever we can to at least provide the resources to be able to help the client. Our main services that we do offer is care coordination, whether it’s crisis driven, somebody is in the hospital and, you know, they need next steps. They need to know what their options are, what they’re going to do, what their home care plan looks like, if they’re going to transition to a different level of care, those sort of things. Long and short term, we can help with transportation to appointments, coordinating those things. scheduling things for clients, talking to insurance companies, things like that. Also health and wellness. So I’m not a nurse, but I’m a gerontologist and I focus more on the social aspect of it, but we do have nurses on staff. So if there is medication reviews, things like that, we can have those done as well. Also safety. So we do home health safety assessments, making sure homes are safe for the clients. We can recommend durable medical equipment. We can help coordinate installation of those things, all of that. Again, discharge planning as well as transition management, advocacy and support for clients. So somebody who doesn’t maybe necessarily have a family or friends or a social support system to help them kind of be an advocate for them. And also provide resources because we have trusted community partners such as you guys at Avery Heights and other multiple resources available so we can refer to other agencies as necessary. And we’re also well informed on social, federal, local programs and resources that people may also qualify for if they’re veterans or if they need to go on Medicaid down the line, things like that. Speaker 1 Oh, wow. Very nice. Yeah. And that’s, you know, one of the key things you said is that people that don’t have anyone. I mean, that’s really where your services, I think, are invaluable because there is a lot. I mean, you know, you get in your 90s and 100 and so forth. Unfortunately, a lot of people out there have kids. You know, obviously, you know, sometimes, you know, their sisters and brothers and stuff like that. And you get to a point where there isn’t anyone to help you. As an older adult, you need that. You need the help. You need the advocacy. I think it’s important. But also on the flip side, working with families is also important because a lot of times they don’t know what they’re doing. Exactly. You know, it’s unfortunate that we work in, it’s fortunate that we work in an industry that is to help people, to help older adults. It’s unfortunate that it is, you know, it’s an industry where you could make a substantial amount of money and therefore a lot of people take advantage of that. Exactly. And it can be sad to see. Unfortunately, we get a lot of folks that come in for tours that have just been through the ringer with many different, you know, everything taking advantage of them and not giving them the real information, especially veterans. I mean, there’s veterans benefits out there. And I don’t know how many people I sit with and they have no idea. No idea. Yeah, exactly. Speaker 2 That’s one of the first questions I ask. Have you spoke with an attorney? Have you have your paperwork in place? Are you a veteran? First things first, because you want to make sure that they know what they’re entitled to. Yeah, absolutely. Speaker 1 And that’s very important in the paperwork, too. Speaker 2 Exactly. And the system is so convoluted and, you know, so confusing. Even to us, more professionals, we do this every day. You know, sometimes I’m like, I don’t know where to go with this. But, you know, we do our best to learn and find resources that can help explain it to us and to be able to explain it to our clients and things like that. So it can be completely overwhelming, especially, you know, if you have no idea where to start. Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly. Totally, totally agree. So what I love is, I’m going to read a little bit. You have a list of questions that if people ask to answer yes to on your website. So, and I read them through and they’re awesome. Who is your ideal client and how can that ideal client benefit from your services? We touched upon that a little bit, but I think it’s important to talk about. Speaker 2 Like you said, I think a lot of my clientele are aging, solo agers. So people who don’t have that support system who, you know, just need somebody to be there to help them because they’re not able to help themselves the same way they used to be. But, you know, as you age, things get more difficult to be an oversight, to be an advocate. A lot of my clients are also the families, the children, the nieces, the nephews that, you know, have realized, oh, mom’s not doing great or auntie’s not doing great. And now where do we go? What are our options? Where do we start? You know, so again, like we said, I said at the beginning, it’s ask us, you know, what you need and we’ll try to help you get there in whatever way we can. So, you know, any really senior who could use a little extra support or security. Speaker 1 Yeah, I can imagine. It’s funny. We do run into a lot where it’s that nephew niece kind of situation. And I adore my nephew. Let me just say that. Both my nephews, I adore them, but it’s just got to be so awkward. I mean, it’s not I love them, you know, but it’s like, you know, and I know them and I’ve known them since they were babies. But to now be like relying on them. Yeah. Care. It’s just, yeah, it’s awkward. I know a lot of times I always hear, oh, I don’t want to ask them. Oh, I don’t want to bother much. And I can imagine I, you know, I can see myself being the same way. So an organization like yours where I’m paying you. So I’m going to ask you a ton of things. Yeah, exactly. A lot, you know, it’s a lot more comfortable. Exactly. Speaker 2 And we also do, you know, some family mediation to some degree where if not everybody’s on board, I’m happy to sit down with the families and kind of talk about, you know, what their options are and how I’m there to support them in ways like that. Because half the time, you know, maybe one child is on board to make a move or to get services in place and the other child, no, mom’s fine. She’s fine. She’s fine. You know, and so can you come in and talk with us and kind of sit down and explain this, you know, so that happens a lot as well. That’s the hardest as well. Speaker 1 A lot of times mom or dad should have moved a while ago. And then one person sometimes is the POA or something that someone, the power of attorney, someone who can sign that paperwork. And, you know, then there’s that rush to make it happen. Inevitably, a lot of times that person’s always like, oh, I wish I had done it sooner. Speaker 2 And there’s guilt behind it. Nobody really wants to necessarily move into an assisted living or a nursing home and things like that. But, you know, once they see the value and, you know, how great it can be, it’s obviously I’m a huge advocate for community living. And I think it’s so important for socialization and things like that. Yep. But, yeah, you know, it gets the point. Let’s let’s talk about the benefits and how your life can improve by making these changes and even home adding home care services, somebody to help you with the laundry and run your errands for you. So you’re you’re safe, but you have everything you need. You’re getting nutritious food and you’re clean and you’re safe. So it really is just a matter of getting everybody on the same page and move forward. Speaker 1 And there’s always that giving it a try to, you always offer that trial where we first want to work in. And that just always feels better to people. You’re not selling the house right this minute and you know, you’re just going to try it out. And that’s, I think it’s important. My big thing when I do tours, it’s like, it’s, this is a big decision. rushing anybody through it or towards it. And that way, when the decision is made, it’s a healthy decision. It’s a decision. There’s no, like you said, regrets and things like that. Exactly. It’s important to slow things down. So what is the process? What is the, take me through when someone signs up for your company and what do you do with them? What’s that onboarding situation? Speaker 2 So usually it’s a referral from another professional or something, or sometimes the family reaches out directly, but they can go to the website, which is talktoneldercare.com. Um, there’s our contact information for the owner, Aaron, and my emails on there, all of our contact information is on there. Um, and we do an initial consultation. So it’s typically virtual, sometimes in person, depending on what the situation is, um, to learn a little bit more about the client’s needs and see if it’s something that we think we can help with. Um, then we would send along the paperwork and get them enrolled in our, in our program. We also use a, we’re probably going to be upgrading it, but right now we use a care treatment, care management system, which, you know, doctors can have access to, the families can have access to all of the notes. It’s a good way to keep in constant communication about clients if they need that. So families can access it at any time as well, and the clients can access it. So it’s a great option. So the process is easy, and we try to make it, you know, as individualized and streamlined as possible. Because if we can help in any way, we will. And we work with our clients in different ways, however they see fit. And with our billing, we’re very upfront about it and things like that. If I’m going to be doing time, I’m going to let them know in advance that I’m going to be doing this and the estimated costs and things like that. So we understand that it can be an expensive thing to have a care manager on on board but we don’t over utilize we just do what we have to do Speaker 1 to help the client and as necessary so so a few things on that um first of all like when you say it’s expensive and here’s the thing I was fortunate enough to had a had a care manager as well for my mom and there was a big difference between what I didn’t and I did and it actually saved me money So it is maybe expensive or an expense, but like we’re talking about having, asking for help, having the right people in place to help you is going to save you money because you end up spending more money. I mean, it took me so long to get my mother in the right place for her. And once she was in the right place, it was easy breezy. It was smooth. But when she wasn’t, and that was because I was making the decisions. And, you know, I’ve been in this industry for almost 15, 16 years now. So now my decisions are obviously would be more educated. But back then, I didn’t. I was just like everybody else. I had no idea. And I made some bad decisions. In fact, potentially, emotionally, mentally. It was so when you look at the expense, it is worth it. Yes, you. Yeah. It feels like you’re putting, but it saves you money and time. Exactly. I put my mother in two different places, which were just wrong for her. Yeah. And that cost me money and moving and mentally for her and me. Exactly. You know, the whole thing, if I had done it all over again, I would have definitely reached out to a company like yours and said, hey, this is what’s going on. What do I do? You know, like you said, there are different levels that people can work with you. I’m sure they can call you and ask you that question. Absolutely. That question, you know, the business relationship and that’s it. You don’t necessarily have you hold the person’s hand, which is great. It might just be, hey, what should I do? Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. And we try to create a roadmap. Sorry, we try to create a roadmap that the client can utilize without us being involved. So if we do a care plan, I have all the resource available, all the contact information, all that information. You can take this and you can use it. And that’s your tool to use. If you need me, my assistance moving forward, I’m here. So it’s, that’s sort of very valuable. Speaker 1 Very good. So the other thing on expense, do you take long-term care? And I know that in insurance itself, I think there’s some elements. So talk about that a little bit. Speaker 2 So there are some ways it’s mostly private pay, but there is some long-term care insurance policies will cover geriatric care management services. We also do long-term care policy reviews as part of our services. So if you have a policy and they’re usually very complicated and confusing and there’s elimination periods and this and that, we can help review those and, you know, help you get the best benefit of it. So occasionally they will reimburse for care management services, but it really all depends on the policy. Otherwise, it’s mainly a private pay situation. Speaker 1 Yeah. So it’s always that even with the long term care policies, ask questions because a lot of times people don’t utilize those policies. Speaker 2 exactly no not at all and they’ve been paying for them and they’re expensive and yeah you know to to know when it’s time to put it in force and to start the elimination period and to get the assessment going and and all that stuff it’s you know people wait too long and then they don’t get Speaker 1 they don’t get the full benefit from it because that’s expensive to pay into yeah exactly use it it’s it’s again very valuable to have when people say they have long-term care policies we actually have balloons and stream. Yeah, it’s true. You know, it’s like, because that’s good. I’m so happy for you because it’s really cover the cost of quality care. Yes. Agreed. Agreed. Agreed. So you talked a little bit about gerontologists and geriatric care manager. And then I know we’ve talked about, I know it’s like that senior living advocate kind of runs in there. Tell me, Define each one of those if you can. And then let’s talk about why we’ve talked about why it’s important for an older adult to have an advocate already. But talk about each one of those. Define those roles. We throw around these words. Yeah, exactly. You’re like, what? Speaker 2 So a gerontologist is somebody who has studied gerontology, which is the management of aging services. So I have my master’s in gerontology. So basically, I’m a gerontologist now. But it really just means that I understand the management of aging services, whether it be assisted living, independent living, nursing home care, all the different aspects of senior care. So that’s just like a designation. Speaker 1 I feel like you’re going, whatever, I did that. Yeah, no, I mean, the people that are listening to this don’t have all that. Speaker 2 Yeah, well, I love it. And then I, you know, as a geriatric care manager, which is also known as an aging life care manager, they’re simultaneous, they can, you know, be interchanged. That is the specific role where we help kind of put all the pieces together. We do the care management pieces like that. There’s also a senior advisor, which can kind of do the same thing. And that’s sort of my role with assisted living locators, where I help people find different community living options. And then, yeah, I think. And then as a senior advocate, there are different companies that are there’s a nurse advocate who is a nurse who helps more with the clinical piece, who helps at the hospitals, who helps with all of those sort of things. I don’t do so much of the clinical piece. I’m more of the social model, but I have the clinical understanding to refer that way. But yeah, so basically I advocate. So even just an example, I had a client who ended up in a hospital in a different part of the state because they were visiting a family member. Their daughter wanted him closer to home to rehab, but the hospital was like, I’m just going to send it to the people I always send it to. And I’m not going to worry about it. And he’s going to rehab two hours away from you for the next couple of weeks. And that’s okay. But she called me and I said, no, no, like they can send these referrals to these places closer and down the road. And now he’s there and hopefully, you know, he does well, but it makes it so much more, but she wasn’t going to be able, she didn’t know to advocate for herself and he had to keep pushing. I sent Email after email, I made a phone call after phone call because this is a quick process. So kind of to help her get that process. But now he’s there and it’s much more convenient for her. And hopefully we can, you know, continue his care beyond that. But that’s just an example of how you need an advocate or to advocate for yourself. Speaker 1 And that’s a great example of an isolated kind of situation where you can come in and help. It doesn’t have to be a full blown thing. And it’s so it floors me as well when people don’t realize that they can, you know, have referrals. They don’t just have to go to where the hospital says that it’s like if you’re in a place rehab that you don’t like person can move. Yeah. These are all the things that I don’t think people understand. And you don’t. It’s like jumping through hoops. They make it difficult. So, you know, you don’t always have to use when you have these companies, which is great. the whole umbrella, you don’t have to use what’s in that umbrella. You can use. Exactly. You have the right to choose. Yeah. I know that for myself, I was with a, my mom, the place where she was, she ended up going on hospice. And when they put her on hospice, they were like, you know, we’re going to use this company. And I was just like, well, yeah, but that company, you know, it’s like, you know, I was in the industry by then. So I knew, tell me some information. You know, you can’t just choose a company for me. I have to vet these people out, have conversations. You know, I don’t have to just go along with the flow. And they can make recommendations Speaker 2 and I’m sure they have good relationships and things like that. Speaker 1 It’s easier and things, Speaker 2 but it might not necessarily always be the right thing. So definitely, I always give options too. And if there are options, I’m giving at least two or three different choices for everything that I refer. You make that decision, but these are the ones that I would recommend Speaker 1 that you reach out to. Speaker 2 And I can help them make that decision, but it’s my job to give them those resources to choose themselves. Speaker 1 Yep, that’s very, very important. So do you have any advice that you can kind of give our caregivers that are out there? Speaker 2 Yeah, you know, take your time, take your respite, take care of yourself. And there’s so many, especially like with people caring for their loved ones who have memory loss or dementia, that is so taxing on the family members and the caregivers. And it’s a nonstop 24-hour job along with most of them are working, have their own families, they’re in the sandwich generation, all of that stuff. But to make sure you take the time to care for yourself. And there are resources available. Like you said, you guys offer short-term respite stays for residents. So if you want to go on vacation, you’re a caregiver, you want to go on vacation, but you can’t leave mom because she’s not going to be okay. There’s options for her, like a community, like Avery Heights where she could stay there for a couple of weeks or a month. And even a lot of insurance companies will help pay for respite options, caregivers to come in the home, contact your local aging service access point, which is like the local senior services, basically. It’s a mouthful area. Aging service access point. But call them and they have so many resources as well. And they can help with caregiver support. I actually partner with some local ASAPs, aging service access points and provide caregiver support. So if a client is overwhelmed or taking care of their parents, they’ll call me and I’ll work with the caregiver to say, these are your options. This is the things you can do to give yourself a break, give you some information and some support. Speaker 1 that’s the best advice and um i know the alzheimer’s association also has uh some funds for rest if you can’t afford that week or two weeks or that month there are some funds that are available and long-term care policies also funds in there for respite uh so if you’re doing that care at home you can get that that respite as well so exactly there’s all sorts of but you’re right it’s so important i was just talking to a young lady this morning who’s actually getting married in September. Yeah. He’s on Monday. She’s trying to get dads in rehab. Mom is at home by herself. She’s trying to kind of take care of herself. Yeah. Not even looking forward to her birthday. So listen, your birthday comes a year. Yeah. Take a minute. Yeah. Go outside and just take a minute for yourself. Yeah. It’s important. It’s important not to get so caught up in a few different things. I know I did it caught up in being, you know, super woman, you know, I’ve got I’m going to help, you know, the guilt trip, the shame, you know, don’t get caught up in that. And don’t get caught up in just, you know, trying to do it all yourself. You know, don’t get caught up in that. Like you said, ask for help. Ask for help. Ask family members too. And it sounds like you can help with that. A lot of times, you know, this young lady, it’s just her. She’s got siblings, but the siblings aren’t really helping. And it sounds like you can kind of get involved there and kind of say, hey, you know, So yeah, this you do, you know, kind of. Speaker 2 Yeah. Can you take on this for me? I need I need you to take on this responsibility. Exactly. And, you know, it might not always be the easiest conversation, but you can’t take care of somebody else if you’re not taking care of yourself. Speaker 1 Exactly. Exactly. So forgive the vacuum in the background. I can’t hear it. You need to self promote here. We are renovating. So we’re renovating the whole front of our building. We’ve got quite a few apartments that we’re updating and renovating. So lots of fun here with the vacuums. Yeah, good. It’s exciting stuff. It’s already a beautiful community. So September, October, we will have a little bit of a facelift. And it is, it’s so funny. When I tour people, I said, hey, we’re going to be renovating. They’re like, what are you renovating? It’s already very nice. You know, you keep up, keep up with the times. So how can we get in touch with you? How can we? Sure. Speaker 2 Yeah, you can reach me, my phone number, 413-329-6730. You can go to tucked in eldercare.com. My email is Katie K at tucked in eldercare.com as well. Yeah. I’m, I’m on LinkedIn. We’re on Facebook. So anyway. Speaker 1 Yeah. Well, we’ll definitely be reaching out. Thank everyone for joining us for the chapter and we’ll see you real soon. Thank you. Thank you so much. 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Listen as we provide tips and guidance, including important steps to take during your… **Categories:** Uncategorized **Tags:** Aging Life Care Professionals --- ### [Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Life Every Day - Inspiration from Author James Flaherty](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/) **Published:** August 1, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** We all need inspiration. In this episode amazing author James Flaherty gives us wisdom through learning about his life and his words. Get the blueprint to live life to the fullest and learn from some Dear Old Friends. [Learn More](https://www.jamesbflaherty.com/) ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1: So, welcome to Your Next Chapter. My name is Siobhan Mattingly. I am the Senior Living Specialist, and it’s great to be here this morning. Your Next Chapter is all about connecting you with resources, friends, and opportunities for older adults, not just for quality of life, but for living life. And I’m so happy today to be here with Jim. Jim is an amazing author, screenwriter, and a whole host of other things. And I love his philosophies and insight. I think in some way we’re kindred spirits because there’s a lot of philosophies and stuff that you mentioned in your book, as well as on your website that I can certainly relate to. But we’ll start off. Tell me a little bit about you. Speaker 2: OK, I’ll start back from the beginning. I was born on a different planet. I was born in Coral Gables, Florida and raised before air conditioning. Speaker 1: Oh, just think about it. Speaker 2: And all of our friends there at Avery Heights, there are many of them that grew up without air conditioning. Speaker 1: But I lived in South Florida. With the cool bands, though, the metal ones that make that really cool noise, right? Speaker 2: Yeah, I had a little fan about this big, about a foot and a half from my head every night sitting on a chair blowing on me. And that was it. That was staying cool. You know, we didn’t worry about it. Nobody had air conditioning. Only people who had, remember how huge that amount of money would be. They say, he has a million dollars. And there was one house in a four block area. And Coral Gables was a wealthy suburb. And there was one house that had one air conditioner ski out of one. Speaker 1: That’s like cable and color TV, right? Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, only movie theaters were air conditioned, not even restaurants. Speaker 1: But you probably didn’t miss it, though. know how could we miss it exactly know it it’s just we didn’t know it that was life yeah that Speaker 2: was life that’s what you live with um then i over the years i went to university of florida two years and i i transferred to michigan state university to get a degree in communications only two schools in 1955 offered a degree in communications wow now every roadside garage and chapel offers it Speaker 1: but I graduated with a degree in communications I worked hard did you I know so did I but so I Speaker 2: went to MSU which we called MSMU it was the first agricultural college in America and I saw snow for the first time when I was 20 years old oh wow which was fun kind of cool um then I grew up I was married and had two young children 19 months apart my my babies are now 61 and 63 i by the way folks i’m 88 but it doesn’t matter i have no plans for waking up on the wrong side of the grass anytime soon okay so you know anyway um i worked my way up from the from below the bottom of the ladder to a corner office job in New York. I was, I don’t know whether anybody saw, it was kind of a silly TV series called Mad Men. Speaker 1: Oh, yes, yes. Speaker 2: Well, that was basically the story of my life. I was much better behaved. I mean, no, my office was not a place Speaker 1: Waters for closers, right? Speaker 2: Not for a place for parties or sex. It was a place to work. I was a nice, very proper married man that I didn’t fool around in New York, but I worked in New York. That was my life. And I was always in New York City, except in 1971, I went home and told my nine and 11 year old daughters, I said, pack, we’re moving. And they said, oh, good daddy. Where are we moving? I said, Buenos Aires, Argentina. I said, where is that dad? I said, 6,500 miles away. And I, I went there to be creative director of J. Walter Thompson. Wow. And we were there for four years playing with the Peronistas. It was very interesting. Speaker 1: Nice, though. Yeah, yeah. Speaker 2: So other than that, I’ve been at age 45, 46, around there, 47, when I was at the top of the mountain in advertising and had a very good life. I left it. I jumped off totally unplanned and bought an abandoned stack of stone up here in the boonies of New York State and opened a country and conference center. Completely stupid thing to do, giving up a very high level executive job, very well paid for no money in a business I didn’t know. But I thought, even though I won’t gamble on a $10, I won’t bet $10 on a football game because I have no control of it. Here we gambled. We put everything we had into a business that I didn’t understand. And I worked 70 hours a week. And guess what? It became successful. Speaker 1: Nice. There you go. So you took a risk on you, really. Speaker 2: It was called crap shooting with your life. But hey, so was Argentina. And that also worked. Speaker 1: Nice. Nice. Speaker 2: I mean, I think you do that. Speaker 1: Yes, you have to. Speaker 2: And now I live in the same town where that country inn is. It’s actually buried in trees across the street. I don’t see it, fortunately. And home is an art-filled 1940 dairy barn converted to a house. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: I have an interior pool in my house. Speaker 1: Really? Speaker 2: That’s something I’ve done for the last 30 years. I decided having a pool in New York state means you only really get to use it about two months a year. It’s either too hot, too cold, too buggy. Oh, look, there’s a wounded deer in the pool. So I thought to hell with it. So we’ve had interior pools for at least 30 years. Really? And it’s wonderful. So when it’s 10 degrees outside and there’s a foot of snow at eight o’clock in the morning or seven 30, as it was this morning, I’m in the pool doing my morning exercises. Speaker 1: Wow. Speaker 2: 30 minutes a day, every morning. Speaker 1: I love it. Speaker 2: And friends, I am talking to friends in Avery Heights, right? Yes. Speaker 1: Well, friends throughout older adults. Speaker 2: Good. Speaker 1: Friends. Speaker 2: You know, part of aging gracefully or not minding aging, you know, if God is good enough to you that he doesn’t give you something you can’t control, We can’t always control illness or the unexplained tumor or something dreadful. If you have just normal aging aspects of life, then you should really work on taking care of yourself. I take care of myself. I weigh 10 pounds less than I weighed at the end of basic training in the army. I have two meals a day, all fruit for breakfast, and then a big full dinner around four o’clock in the afternoon. and and then I do 30 minutes of exercise every morning and if you don’t have a pool do it yourself yep take a room in your do something to keep your your body moving and of course you you know be careful what you eat and you don’t drink and god knows you don’t smoke if you smoke I’ll come over there and slap you I mean so you don’t do that and you take care yourself. And I went in to see my doctor recently for a physical, and he looked at me and he said, he’s a very cold hearted guy. He’s been by doctor for 40 years. He looks up and he said, my most boring patient, there’s nothing wrong with you. And I’m lying. I’m not 88. I won’t be 88 for six more weeks. In September, I’ll be 88. But there’s nothing wrong with me. Nice. You know, and he said, get used to it. You may live through 100. My children say, oh, God. Speaker 1: We have a few hundred-year-olds, centurions, I think they call it. Speaker 2: I think it’s centenarians. Speaker 1: Centenarians, thank you. Speaker 2: Actually, I went to a workshop in March and Dan Buettner, who wrote all the Blue Zones books. Speaker 1: Yes, love him. Speaker 2: Dan was the guest host and he’s become a good friend of mine. Speaker 1: Really? Speaker 2: And the subject was longevity. And I can do a whole talk on Blue Zones. I love Blue Zones. Someday we’ll do that in the future, Siobhan. Siobhan, I’m sorry, Siobhan, right? Speaker 1: Yes, Siobhan. Speaker 2: Siobhan, Siobhan. Speaker 1: Pardon me, I should know that. Speaker 2: I’m Irish. Speaker 1: Sibby’s fine. Sibby’s fine. Sibby’s my nickname. Speaker 2: No, I like Siobhan. Okay. So life is good. So now I write. I write full time. I wrote two fiction novels, pure fiction, which could be very interesting TV series or films if I could ever find an agent to sell them. I’ve written two nonfiction books that I know you want to talk about the first one today, Dear All Friends, which I’m very fond of. And then my more recent one is called Embrace Your Age. This is the most recent one. Embrace Your Age. You can be better than ever. I’ve also written a TV series that’s ready to be produced if somebody would look at it. It’s about a newscasting show and it’s called The Seniors Old Enough to Know Better. oh wow uh um i’m working on a screenplay i have a new novel underway you know idle fingers are the devil’s playground so i’m yes i’m over busy but that’s okay yeah that’s all right that’s all right and i’m happy to be here with you all today let me see is there anything else i’m leaving out about myself no we’ll we’ll get to the rest of it as we chat so tell me um i like i said i feel like we’re Speaker 1: definitely connected uh many things i read in your bio and even just now you’re talking about you know uh bachelor’s degree in communications my birthday’s in august so you’re a virgo my so there’s lots of things but what i love is your um definitely your life philosophy and my favorite piece of it was when you talked about this just hit home making your bed I saw this um on YouTube actually uh the Admiral I saw him Admiral any wonderful McRaven every morning I make my bed and there are mornings where I’m like but but it does it just feels there’s something about it that makes you feel like I’ve started my day it empowers you and and I love the fact that it’s like the one thing that you can do. And it’s just, it’s perfect. And when you even when you walk in the room, and you’re getting dressed, you see it all made, it just feels right. And so talk about your life Speaker 2: philosophy a little bit. You take something messy and make it neat. Yeah, starting your you’re starting your day that way. I’m gonna make whatever’s messy out there. I’m gonna need it up. Yes, what you can control. I love that. And it’s good. I think part of that came from I’m gonna back up for one second. I say without any shame or guilt, because my father died, unfortunately, when I was very young. He was the district attorney of the city of Miami. And he died in a one-week period because of a hospital error in 1950. Hospitals weren’t always that smart. And I had no older siblings, and we had no relatives living nearby. So I was raised by, Fortunately, a wonderful brilliant woman, my mother. So I say without guilt or shame, I’m a mama’s boy. Speaker 1: Nice. Speaker 2: Because she gave me a lot of, well, my whole point of view in life, I realize, comes from her. I can still hear her voice. You can never be too clean. If you can see what you’re wearing, you’re not standing or walking correctly. Speaker 1: I like that one. Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, it was very funny. And, okay, my, I’m going to, I’m actually going to read one paragraph from dear old friends, which you want to discuss today, which leads into my philosophy. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: I know, and all my ageless friends know, that although you can’t stop the aging process, you sure as hell can go right on living. up to the last second you can still create still produce still influence still teach still love and instill love yeah you know and that’s what i try to do i if i can condense my point of view it’s it’s never too late to make your life and the lives of those around you better, happier, and more satisfying. Now, I know it may sound a bit Pollyanna-ish, but I do it. Thanks, mom. She said, every morning when you get up, every morning of your life, you’re going to have to face your most severe critic, the highest wall you have to hurdle, the most difficult person you’re going to know. It’s that person in your bathroom mirror. And you either can look at that person every morning and go, good God, another day. Or smile sweetly and bravely at that person and say, good God, another day. Another chance to see, to hear, to taste, to smell, to touch, to give love, to help others. It’s called another opportunity to embrace life. Hey, friends, there’s no guarantees about tomorrow. And the past ended last night. Yep. As I often say to groups, because I’m I’m giving weekly lectures to another group, just like you nice people at Avery Heights. Yes. Right now. And I say to every week when I go, I say, remember what I say. Right. This very minute as we are talking right this very moment, you are the oldest you’ve ever been. Yes. And you are the youngest you will ever be. Yep. So basically, we’re starting life over right now. Yeah, right now. You can’t go all the way back and restart the beginning. But you can start right now and change the ending. Yes, I agree. Speaker 1: It’s funny you mentioned that quote. I highlighted that. Oh, good. Yeah. Speaker 2: It’s one I remind myself every day. Why don’t go ahead and give you just so just for folks, Speaker 1: Give your website just so people know where they can get a lot of this information. Speaker 2: Okay. I’ll hold this up so you can see my name again because the website is, you know, just www.jamesbflaherty.com. It’s an Irish name. It was originally when they arrived at Ellis Island, it was the old Flaherty’s and the old Brian’s and the old Kelly’s and the old Rourke’s. And they said, sure, and if we’d be dropping the O, no one would be knowing that we’re immigrants. Actually, one of my daughters who lives in England went back to the historic name. Besides the fact that she has a very Irish first name, which a name that I gave her 61 years ago when nobody had that name. I named her Shannon. Oh, nice. And she, so she is legally Shannon O. Flaherty. Yeah. You know, and when she was older, she said, I love my name, daddy. Where did you get it? And I said, I named you after a duty free liquor airport. And she said, thank you very much. Speaker 1: That’s awesome. That’s awesome. Oh, okay. Hold on. Yeah, good. All right. Well, Speaker 2: while she’s gone, we can talk. We can talk about other things then. Oh, let’s see now. Speaker 1: All right, I’m back. So why don’t we talk about your book? Okay. Why don’t you hold up that cover Speaker 2: and let’s talk about it. Here’s the book we’re talking about today. Dear old friends, stay young, stop thinking old, and love your life every day. Okay. I’m going to show you something that most people that you don’t know either. When I originally published the book, it had a different subtitle. I did that. I finally said, okay, I better get more commercial and make the subtitle more to the point so people understand. The original subtitle, remember I’m a writer. So writers get, we get involved with the poetry of language. And here was a poster I had for it. And the original subtitle says, a loving reminder, The band won’t stop playing till you stop dancing. Speaker 1: Oh, I like that, though. Speaker 2: I know. I like it better as a writer. The writer in me is much happier with it. Speaker 1: Well, you know what? You can always introduce that now later. Speaker 2: So like, yeah, I still use it as a when I’m talking to people. I like giving lectures because it’s something I said years ago. And I and I makes me happy. Like George Bernard Shaw, who had a lot of wonderful quotes. George Bernard Shaw said, you don’t stop playing because you get old. You get old because you stop playing. Speaker 1: Yes, I saw that on your site. Speaker 2: I like that. Speaker 1: Yes. Speaker 2: That’s very true. Speaker 1: We need stuff like that. We need inspiring and encouraging. Your website is, I was like, you know, talk about a rabbit hole. I mean, and the one thing I thought about you when I was looking at your website, reading parts of your book is wisdom. Like, I truly believe that older adults and that’s why our thing is your next chapter is because I truly believe and we truly believe that, like you said, unless you’re, you know, you stop dancing, you know, you’ve got more to give. And you’re full of wisdom, which I really love. And I love the gentle way you approach your audience as well. You’re not coming from way up here. You’re coming from right here. And you’re speaking to them, you know, like your book as friends. Speaker 2: Well, I’m one of them. Although if we go back to dear old friends, I know we’re jumping around a little bit. It’s okay. Speaker 1: We’re still on the same subject. We’re in the same vein. Speaker 2: Right. Right, right. To talk about, dear old friend, why did I write it? My whole life, and to this day, I’m not sure why, because I was not, I look back at myself at 14, 15, 16, and I was not a star of, wow, look at that brilliant kid, you know, and I didn’t, I wasn’t the captain of the football team or the president of the class. I was good old Jimmy. I was Jimmy because my father was Jim. And everybody knew me and liked me, but I wasn’t number one in popularity. I was a very good kid. We were all good kids, of course. There was no such thing as drugs. Nobody had sex in high school. No, but you know, I remember people say, we saw Dan and he was smoking a cigarette and everybody was shocked. That was shocking in high school in Carl Gable, Florida. Granted, I wasn’t growing up in New York City. I was growing up in a beautiful, soft suburban town of about 3,000 people back then. And there weren’t multi-trillionaire sports stars with mansions and yachts around. It was just a nice growing up town. But got off the subject there. Oh, I know, I know. Anyway, I was talking about why did I have old friends? I know you said you wanted me at one point to talk about the one, the first one I mentioned in the book was Jane Prettyman. And I had heard about her before I, when I entered high school, she taught sophomore biology and everybody said, she’s very interesting, but really tough. And when we met Jane, she was probably an, a wretchedly old woman of about 45, you know, and, and she said, I want you to know that if you can make a B in my course, you’ll make a B in college biology. And she was right. She was that good, that advanced a teacher back then. And I remember she was funny as hell. She wore test hats. She’d come in for a test and she’d have an inverted, like a Chinese coolie hat on with pigtails down to her ankles. Or once she wore a gorilla mask in the class. She was amazingly, she kept our attention always glued to her. One day she, after my father died, and that was a picture in the front page of the Miami Herald because it was so well known. She called me because shortly after that, I was in her class. And she said, Jim, do you need any, would you like to earn a little money after school? I have some chores to be done around my house. And I said, oh, yes, ma’am, I’d really like that. So I came over and she would give me silver to polish or I could wash her car. She had a big Lincoln Continental with a spare tire on the rear end. and and we would talk and it turned out she’d actually dated my father before he met my mother but she was a wonderful woman and and i was sitting there one day in the hot florida day moaning about my poor life being fatherless at age 14 and a half or whatever i was yeah and she said, I know losing your father was a great loss for you, Jimson, but your mother’s loss is much greater. She’s lost her lover. Now, you have to understand, I was a bit of a prude. I still am a bit of a prude, surprisingly. I don’t always admit it. And I remember kind of being shocked by that but then she explained Jane helped me understand the importance of relationships and and long-term commitments and things back then and I was 14 15 and a and a very young 14 15 I wasn’t like 15 going on 20 no I was 15 I was 15 going on 13 you know and then I realized Thinking back, I had a lot of, not a lot, but I had two or three other, like a couple of neighbors that were in their 40s and 50s that were, I guess, very fond of me or they saw something in me. As I got older, my friends got older. When I was in my 20s, I had 50-year-old friends. When I was in my 30s, I had a lot of friends in their 60s. Speaker 1: Wow. Speaker 2: And in the 40s, I had a lot of friends in their 70s. Yeah. You know, and it was not, and it was wonderful. They pushed, they criticized, they complained, they say, turn left, turn right, don’t do that. How can anyone be that stupid? Or that’s amazing you did that. I’m proud of you. And the net net was they made it good to be Jim. Because I listened to them because I thought, damn. they’re wiser than I am yeah yeah they they’ve been there you know I’m I’m still and I still felt like a kid when I was in I actually had worked my way up I was in a corner office job in Manhattan when I was 33 years old wow you know that was a big deal I you know and it’s funny growing up growing up in the 40s and 50s, big money wasn’t something you knew about. All of our kids, I’m talking to all my friends out there and Avery and our friends online that are listening to us, all of we are from a different generation. Remember, without social media, without television, nobody really knew everything at once. You know, now the kids, unfortunately, I think, know too much and they are bombarded with too much. And so therefore they are concerned about the world situation and climate control and politics. And maybe life was simpler and easier back then because you went to school to learn reading, writing and arithmetic and you pledged the flag in the morning. You know, I mean, it was a very normal. God-fearing, one-nation-under-God-under-flagged upbringing, which I’m glad that I had. And I’m glad my children came along early enough that they had that more than not, even though they had a crazy-ass father who dragged them 6,500 miles to Argentina and made them live in English and Spanish. and to this day they they still are fluent in spanish that’s we all are after when we got there i said after a year when you all speak spanish well enough i mean we’re going to take a vacation and go around the continent which we did we climbed over the rocks of machu picchu and we scrambled the equator and we did all those things wonderful you know and it gave them an international Speaker 1: point of view, which I like. Jim, tell me about, summarize the book, and then tell me why, as an Speaker 2: old book, I should read the book. Let’s go back to the book. I wrote the book. I realized one day when I was 42 years old, so friends, that was 86 years of 46 years ago, 46 years ago, how much I loved my old friends, how much I absolutely adored them. And this book is dedicated to the Traynums, Carl and Honor Traynum. And I sat down one day, not writing a book, I sat down to write a love letter to my friends. And it went on and on and on. And suddenly I looked at it and it was 60 pages long. And I read it and I smiled. I said, that’s lovely. Knowing I couldn’t send anybody a 60 page letter. I thought, isn’t that sweet? And I filed it. And then life got busy and I forgot it. And about three years ago, cleaning my office, I found that file and I got it out and I read it again, smiling. And I thought, hot damn, my attitude hasn’t really changed, except there’s a big change. I’m one of them. I’m a dear old friend now. And that’s why I can talk about this subject because at my age, I don’t look at everything from the standpoint of the 42 year old. Yeah. You know, I have a more realistic viewpoint of what happens to you, you are going to get older, a matter of how, how well are you going to cope with it. And so when I found it, I thought, and I didn’t have any plans to write any nonfiction books, because I was really deep into writing novels in those days. I thought it was great, Great fun to write a novel. I’ll get into that later because it’s very exciting when you write a novel. You become those people. You have to speak their language and walk their walk and do everything. But I thought, I wonder if I could just update Dear Old Friends, add a few comments, but keep much of the basic thinking in it. And I wrote this book. And I kept the same title because I had written on it Dear Old Friends as a title. Speaker 1: Mainly because your friends, you were always younger and they were older. Speaker 2: Oh, they were always older. Much, much, much older. I’ve lost all those old friends, of course. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: You know, because they’re good. I know I quote there in one of my old friends, Ruth West. She was an ancient hag, probably about 80. Then a wonderful, wonderful woman. And she said, you don’t put an age on people, do you, Jim? And I said, no, I really don’t. You know, even now I mentor high school seniors now and then. I go and talk to them about what’s ahead for them and why I want them to shape up or ship out. I’m not the easiest human being in the world. You know, my children said you were everything, but you didn’t make a salute. But that was about all. Speaker 1: Now, who’s your favorite? Who’s your favorite old friend? Speaker 2: Oh, it’s very hard because there were so many. I’ll say Carl and Honor Trainham. So one day I found, this was this unplanned event in my life, when I found an abandoned stack of stone here in Armenia, New York, where I live, which is, we call it anemia or amnesia. But it’s right on the Connecticut border. We’re right next door to Sharon, Connecticut. So if you go to the northwest corner of Connecticut and you see beautiful villages like Sharon, Lakeville, and Salisbury. And we’re right one mile from the border of Sharon. Speaker 1: Wow. Speaker 2: But Emenia is kind of a blue collar town. It’s a boonies town. On the other side of us is Millbrook, New York, which is money and rich and all mansions. There is a very rich part of Emenia, however, buried in the woods. And I found this abandoned stack of English stone full of raccoon droppings. no functioning anything no utilities the grounds and gardens over and I fell in love with it and bought it and the owner somebody I had never met of course and his lawyer made some stupid things and I at one point called my lawyer in New York and said cancel it and he said but Jim I know you love this place I said cancel it the people are idiots and I can’t be pushed I get to a point when I say no they’ll they’ll i said something a new window will open a new door will open there’s always something new out out there if your mind is open to it right yes so he called he canceled it and the next day he called me and he said there’s a gentleman in my office who would like to meet you and i said what i mean stanley never did this the attorney i was working in new york and i said fine. So he came over with this sweet looking white haired gentleman sat down, Carl Trainham, and his wife was Amy Einstein Spengarn, who was a daughter of the owners, Joel and Amy Spengarn, a very wealthy, very liberal, highly intellectual Jewish family from Manhattan. Wow. Joel was the first Jewish professor at Columbia University and was also, by the way, I know I’m stepping away from the basic story of Carl. Joel wrote a letter. He was a very influential liberal and he wrote a letter one day and I saw the original. Here is the beginning of the black movement in America. A letter that said, I have a dream of a unified colored republic. And Martin Luther King said, hey, catchy phrase, and made that the slogan for Black America. And Joel used to invite all of the leading Black scholars in America to Troutbeck, and they formed NAACP right there across the street. And he was one of the officers of it. So the House had a very interesting liberal history. Anyway, Carl came in. Carl Tranum came into my office that day. He and Honor had been married on the front lawn of Trump when I knew them better. And he said, tell me what happened. So I told him the story of the back and forth. And he said, well, no wonder you were angry. He said, do you mind? Just a slight sound of his Tennessee boyhood. Not much. He was too educated to keep that accent. He said, do you mind if I make a telephone call, if I can set the deal back on the right track, would you still go ahead with it? And I said, certainly. And in that soft way, he said, yeah, you idiots. I can hear it. He very sweetly told the lawyer and his son, who at that point was the owner. And the deal went through and I bought the stack of stone. Oh, what did you do with it? I turned it into a, I kept the original name of it, Troutbeck, Troutbeck, which is the name of a village in the Lake District of England. And I opened a country and conference center. Speaker 1: Oh, okay. Yeah. Speaker 2: And I worked 70 hours a week and it was successful. And I owned it for 30 years. And then God was good to me in 2016 before COVID came around and said, Jim, even though you’re an idiot, I think in your 80 years old and you really shouldn’t be working like that. Sell it. And I sold it. Speaker 1: I was going to ask you because you mentioned it earlier and I was going to ask you. Speaker 2: Well, it’s very much a part of my life. I mean, that was 30 years of my life. And for the first for the first 15 years of that to build a business, I was there 70 hours a week. Speaker 1: Wow. Speaker 2: And then I could back away from it. We started traveling and we had a villa in Acapulco. I mean, life was good. Jim has not suffered. Jim had nothing. Another thing, you know, people say, oh, Jim, you must have had a trust fund or something. Jim had nothing. Speaker 1: Wow. Jim worked. Speaker 2: Noel Coward, who’s a wonderful British wag, an actor and a writer, had a wonderful line years ago that I totally embraced heart and soul, and I still do at my advanced age, work is more fun than fun. Speaker 1: Yes, yeah. Speaker 2: And I loved it. How long can you float around a pool with a margarita in your hand? I can do that for 30 minutes. I did it now and then. But I held with it. I don’t do that anymore. Anyway, Carl and his wife, Honor, became my best friends. My mother said she was jealous until she met them. She said that I understood because they were exactly the age of my parents. And they lived in St. Thomas in the Virgin Islands. And I miss them so much that we went down and bought a home on top of a mountain in St. Thomas. And I lived there for 10 years. Not full time. I would go down for two weeks at a time, three weeks at a time. But they were very, very dear. Speaker 1: You really lived an amazing life. So what’s next for you? What’s next for you? Speaker 2: Well, you know, as I say on the line under my name on the next book, The Embrace Your Age, I say an optimistic octogenarian with a bright future. I think it would be easier to get the Pope to come to Armenia to bless dinner than to get a literary agent these days. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: You know, especially at my age. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: Okay. I’ve been invited to give a TED Talk in October. I heard that. Which TEDx Talk, not TED Talk, TEDx Talk. Speaker 1: Where is that? Whereabouts? Speaker 2: I’m going to be giving it in a suburb of Seattle. Speaker 1: Wow. Speaker 2: So I’ve got to fly out to Seattle and. Speaker 1: Good for you. Speaker 2: Which is fine. Yeah. Because it adds credibility to me. So if I go to an agent and say, hey, I’m a TEDx speaker and I have got all these properties, at least look at them for God’s sake. So I can get somebody to look at it. Who knows? Maybe I’ll have a TV series on air. I would like to do that. Yeah. You know, it’s not a matter. You know, I confess I should feel guilty about it, but I don’t. I’m not the young, starving writer huddled in a dirty garret somewhere writing. No, I’m a very comfortable elderly gentleman in his art-filled barn with a pool. And I made a very smart decision 23 years ago that all of my friends are wildly, wildly envious. And I said, you were idiots. Some of you, because you could have made that decision and you were too stingy or too stupid to do it. I hired a woman, a darling woman from Mexico, who is now an American citizen. So we go to vote together. And when I was very sick after bad surgery in Mexico, she came in and took care of me. And I started calling her the nanny. And to this day, Esther Lopez Hernandez is her name. And more common sense than anyone I’ve ever known. She’s with me 23 years later, still with me. And she introduces herself to people. She said, hello, I am Senor Jim’s nanny. And everybody says, can we come to dinner, Senor Jim? Because the food is brilliant. I told the hospital, I’m very close to Sharon Hospital, Sharon, Connecticut. I said, if you run out of OR space, you can always come to our house because it’s that clean all the time. Good for you. But so it’s good. Life is good. Speaker 1: It’s been amazing to chat with you. Hold up the book, the one we were talking about, Dear Old Friends. And tell us, where do you find that? Where do you find the book? Speaker 2: You can find all of my books on Amazon under my name. You go to, you know, books and go to Amazon.com and look for James Flaherty, F-L-A-H-E-R-T-Y, James B. Flaherty. And you either look for Dear Old Friends or Embrace Your Age. You can find those books. Speaker 1: I don’t know. Speaker 2: Do we have any more time or do you want to do anything else? Speaker 1: I think we’re good. We’re at the end. Speaker 2: Oh, we are. Oh, OK. Speaker 1: We’re definitely going to have you back. I definitely want to talk about Embrace Your Age next time. Okay. I’m like sitting here like in awe. I’ve got all sorts of stuff highlighted and all sorts of notes. Thank you so much. The wisdom that you have in life is contagious, and I appreciate it. Speaker 2: My pleasure. Remember, friends, you are as old as you think, so don’t think old. Speaker 1: Thank you so much. Speaker 2: Think tomorrow. Speaker 1: Yeah, and we’ll see everyone next time on your next chapter. Thank you. Speaker 2: Thank you. … # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/its-time-to-be-self-centered/ "It’s Time to Be (Self) Centered") ## [It’s Time to Be (Self) Centered](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/its-time-to-be-self-centered/ "It’s Time to Be (Self) Centered") July 11, 2023 F50Woman is all about taking the risk and the steps to live “your next chapter”. 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The All of Us Research Program aims to change this. In this episode, principal investigator Katrina Yamazaki discusses how this NIH study is creating a diverse database to advance precision medicine, offering care tailored to individuals rather than the average patient. She explains the participation process, emphasizes that it is entirely free, and outlines the ancestry and health-risk results available, including complimentary genetic counseling. For more information or to enroll, visit [joinallofus.org](http://joinallofus.org). ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 So, welcome to your next chapter. My name is Siobhan Mattingly, and I’m here today with Katrina, who’s awesome. I’m not going to even attempt the last name. I will let you do that. Speaker 1 So, she is here with all of us research project. I had the great pleasure of meeting with her co-workers at the latest West Hartford Senior Center event, which was awesome. And I was I was absolutely fascinated. I have tons of questions. So let’s get started. Tell us about Speaker 2 All of Us Research Program. Yeah. So hi, my name is Katrina Yamazaki, and I’m the principal investigator for the All of Us Research Program. And so the All of Us Research Program is an NIH initiative to advance precision medicine. And so this whole program started from President Obama’s precision medicine initiative that really tried to understand how to shift healthcare from a one size fits all model to more of a tailored approach to healthcare, right? So for example, if you’re looking at your neighbors, you understand that there are differences between you and your neighbor and your healthcare should reflect those differences, right? So you want healthcare tailored to you in order to put you in the best possible outlook, right? Or put you on the best possible track for treatment. And so the All of Us program is really designed to diversify research. And so historically, a lot of populations have been left out of research for various reasons. Speaker 2 And so we don’t have a true understanding of different factors that impact their health. And so if we shift to precision medicine, we really need to understand those differences. And building this database for healthcare researchers to really begin to understand different factors that affect the health of different populations in order to design more targeted therapies, treatment plans, things like that. And so all of us, the goal is to enroll 1 million participants that reflect the diversity of the United States population. Speaker 2 Wow. Now, where are you guys with that goal? So we are currently, so the national program is, we have roughly over 650,000 participants that have already enrolled and started the process. Speaker 2 Out of that 650,000, about another 450,000 has completed all the steps for enrollment. And that means they’ve submitted surveys to answer questions about themselves, their personal health, their lifestyle. They’ve also submitted biospecimen samples, such as urine samples and blood samples, so that their DNA can be sequenced to understand genetic components that affect their health. Speaker 2 And so we consider those core enrollments. And so we’re roughly at 450, just a little under 500,000. And so the goal for the rest of this year is really try to get over that 500,000 mark. Speaker 2 And what’s remarkable is through all of the enrollment sites across the United States is the population is 80 percent UBR, which stands for 80 percent of the participants are from populations that have been historically underrepresented in biomedical research. Speaker 1 Nice. So why would I participate? Besides the fact that it’s really cool and I’m fascinated by this stuff, but why would I participate? What’s my, why would I do this? Speaker 2 So a lot of the reasons why participants join the program is one, the All of Us Research program is unique in that they value participants as partners. And so as we gather all of this information, one of the main goals is to return results to the participants so they can see how their data is being used to accelerate precision medicine research. And so we send out research highlights to show how your research is being used for different research studies. Speaker 2 For the individuals, they get ancestry data as well as health-related results data. Those health-related results data is important because through DNA sequencing, you get genetic tests done. And then if basically your DNA is sequenced and then genetic test identity, if you are at risk for different diseases such as cancers or cardiovascular diseases. Speaker 2 And if you have a positive screen for those, then we set you up with a genetic counselor for free so you can actually discuss those results and decide the proper course of action and help coordinate care with your primary care provider. Speaker 1 That’s fantastic. I think especially it sounds like it would be good for someone that is adopted, for example. And let’s say we don’t have a lot of documentation on the adoptive parents. And now you’re having your own kids and you’re standing there going, you know, do you have this in your background? And you’re like, you know, I don’t know. This would be a great opportunity to to find that out. Speaker 2 Yeah, I love that you brought that up because I myself in it, me and my husband adopted three kids from the doctor care system in San Diego and not having their full medical history makes it hard to understand their developmental milestones growing up. So they’re all under the age of four. And so I am eagerly awaiting for the pediatrics program to unveil so that we can enroll them in the program and start to receive some of those information that we are missing in order to, you know, provide the best care that we could for our children. Speaker 1 That’s awesome. Now, what how much does it cost? Speaker 2 It actually doesn’t cost anything to participate. So it is completely free of charge. And so enrollment is coming into an enrollment site or completing the steps on your own. Speaker 2 There is no charge to join. There is no charge for the return of genetic results. And there is no charge if you need to see a genetic counselor based on your DNA. Speaker 1 Nice. And actually, leave me if you can go more in depth. So the next question is, how do I how do I participate? Speaker 1 How do I, because you said enrollment sites are online. How do I, what’s the website and how do I do that? So the website is on my Zoom background right there. Speaker 2 Or right there. And so that’s a great place to find out more information about the program. And on that website, there is a registration button where if you are able to start the process on your own, then you can just go ahead and start creating your account in the participant portal and start filling out surveys and going through the consent material. Speaker 2 For anyone that needs help with that process, because it is a long process and would just want, you know, a person to guide you through the enrollment. We have our research team is at Community Health Centers locations. We are fixed permanently in Meriden, New Britain, New London and Middletown. Speaker 2 But we’ve also started going out on the road and visiting other community health center locations throughout Connecticut to help facilitate the enrollment process and raise awareness of the program. But at any time, you can also call our main line or email us and we can easily contact you via phone and help you start that process. And so our email is allofusatchc1.com. Speaker 2 And our phone number is 860-852-0890. And one of our team members is more than happy to walk you through that process. Speaker 1 That’s awesome. And you can send that to me and I’ll include that in the description of the show. Perfect. Speaker 1 Yeah. That sounds great. How long does it take for me to get results? Speaker 1 Because obviously, you know, people are probably like, oh, you know, wanting to get it as quick as possible. Speaker 2 Yeah, it does take time to get the results. 400,000 people. So I think it’s like a minute, right? Speaker 2 Plus, more people are enrolling each day. So it does take time to get the results back. Ancestry data tends to come a little bit faster than the health related results information. Speaker 2 We’ve seen the results take a short amount of time to a long amount of time. So we really don’t like to give an approximate timeline because we don’t want to really get anybody’s hope up. But we are working with the national program to make sure that all participants get a return of results and working with them to see if there’s any errors that we may help fix to make sure that the participants get return of results. Speaker 1 Very nice. And so the website’s there. So that website, they can go on and let’s say, because this is obviously going to be out there nationally. they can go wherever and find out, you know, if they’re in Oklahoma, they’d be able to go on this same website and find information. Right. So this website is specific for our community health center with the Speaker 2 backslash THC. But join all of us.org is the national website that anybody can go on and join and read about more information or learn about programs in their home state or in their hometown where they can go and enroll in the program. Wonderful. Now you said Speaker 1 ancestry information. Tell me more about that. So am I going to find like a long lost aunt or uncle Speaker 2 or? No. So it’s nothing like genetic, like some of the genetic kids out there. So it’s not like 23andMe or where they start to connect the people across the U.S. Like you have a sibling in this Right. It’s nothing like that. What it does is it will just tell you where your roots lie from. Speaker 2 So if you don’t know, like, let’s say you were adopted and you don’t know what your ancestral data is, it’ll just return information that, oh, you, your ancestry is from this part of the world and this part of the world. Speaker 1 You’re this percentage of this. Yeah. So in terms of privacy, obviously, you know, we’re in the age of like we’re all out there. But, you know, with our medical information, HIPAA and those types of things, how is that participant protected? Speaker 2 Right. So I would see insecurity as one of the core values of the program and is something that we take very seriously. And so there are precautions that are set up to minimize the risk of participation or of security breaches. Speaker 2 We can’t guarantee that there will be absolutely none, but we do take all the precautions to minimize everything. And so we like to tell our participants that any information that they submit, as soon as it goes into the portal, it becomes what we call de-identified, meaning that all of their survey responses are inputted, but all of their identifying information, names, phone numbers, addresses are removed from the system. and they’re assigned a unique participant ID so that we can use that participant ID to connect to survey questions, electronic health record information that’s in there, biofessaman information, but you can’t actually connect it to a particular individual. Speaker 2 The program also has certificates of confidentiality, which they have implemented to prevent the sharing of data with any court orders or things like that, so that things remain as secure and private as possible. And so we don’t share your genetic results information with anyone. Even if you have to go see a genetic counselor, they’ll walk you through how to then, and they’ll provide a clinical test to verify how to download that report. Speaker 2 And then the individual themselves have to take it to their primary care provider. So we don’t share it between the people. Speaker 1 I like that. And I like that it’s a part of your core values. I think that’s going to make people feel super comfortable. And it seems extremely well thought out, which is great as well, because sometimes it’s tough. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Well, it’s extremely important because historically with some of the research that has been going on, we’re trying to rebuild trust within some of these populations. And so that’s why it’s one of the core values is really trying to make sure that we are being transparent with what we’re doing to try to build trust within the communities because it’s so important that they participate in research. And so really just trying to get them more comfortable in participation as well. Speaker 1 Yeah, let’s talk about more about that underserved population. Who are they and what do you mean? Speaker 2 So those historically underrepresented in biomedical research populations include ages 65 and over, right? They tend to be left out of research. Racial, ethnic, marginalized populations have tended to be left out of research. Speaker 2 members of the LGBTQ community, right? We also have those that are fall under the federal poverty level. And a lot of these reasons why they’ve been left out of research is maybe access to research opportunities, not being aware that they exist. And so really trying to make sure that this program is accessible to all and that we really promote the message that we value participation from all. Speaker 1 and it’s uh i think the trust i mean i know that you know you know when you’re you know having been someone that has been in that you know uh lower income level i mean it’s kind of like you do it’s kind of like you’re you want to protect everything you don’t want to be given information and and and there’s a lot of uh disappointment too where you’re someone doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do and so it’s like something like this you would be like huh what’s what’s going on there but it sounds amazing. And it definitely sounds like something that’s going to help a ton of people. I love that my doctor right now, I’m not a one size fits all my entire life. It was like, you need to gain weight, you need to gain weight. And now she looks at my weight and go, I haven’t heard that in months from her, you know, cause I’m working, I’m doing what I have to do. Speaker 1 She’s looking at my numbers and she’s not comparing me to a, you know, 57 year old woman that she’s gone. And so it’s nicer, it’s nicer not to hear you have to gain weight, because like any of us, we all have trouble with our, you know, something that way, who knows what it may be, and either down, it’s not like you’re not trying. It’s, it’s like, but it’s sort of here and go, what should I do? But she’s not one size fits all. So it sounds like this is going to even more, you know, get rid of that one size fits all, you know, so we can, you know, especially with that whole positive body image thing and all that going on, that is so important because nobody wants to go to the doctor. You know, some of us are, you know, bigger bones. We’re not going to be, you know, looking like whoever, you know, and so to me, to them or them, to me, it’s not fair because you can’t do one size fits all. So I love that. I love this type of research and I love what you’re Speaker 2 doing. Yeah, I think it’s important, right? Because even if you think about beyond an individual, it could be a neighborhood, right? You can be telling somebody that has, that’s in a neighborhood with maybe they’re pre-diabetic and you’re trying to prevent them from, you know, moving into that diabetic range. A lot of the information, eat healthier, move more, right? If the individual lives in a community where there’s no safe basis to exercise, right? Or access to healthy foods, it makes it difficult. So what are other ways that we can help them manage their chronic diseases that match the environment and lifestyle that they live. Speaker 2 Because it could be sometimes it’s out of their control, right? So really trying to figure out, you know, what are some of the best intervention strategies to implement in different communities? Speaker 1 Yeah, I like that. And I think that builds trust too, because you see me. You’re not just kind of throwing out buzzwords. Speaker 1 You can see, okay, yeah, that sounds great. That’s the, you know, pre-diabetic solution, but I live XYZ and you guys will have those customized plans and that’s going to build trust too. Cause you’re not just throwing out, throwing out stuff. Yeah. Tell me about some of the organizations and you might’ve mentioned it in the beginning. So I apologize that you’re, that this whole thing is affiliated with, cause it’s joining all of us is kind of the, which I love. And it’s funny, I’m looking at the back, your backdrop now, which is just, I think it clicked like maybe five minutes. Oh, be one in a million. They want to be brilliant, by the way, but being a person. But what is the organization, the higher kind of organization Speaker 2 that all of this is affiliated with? Right. And so, like I said, this program is funded by the NIH. Speaker 2 And so within the NIH, we have different, what we call regional medical centers. So these large academic institutions that are enrollment sites. And so if you’re in California, the UC systems, right? But in Connecticut, there’s Yale. So all of these different areas are enrollment sites. So we have enrollment sites all over the US, or at least if they’re not in your state, the option for online enrollment. And so there we have numerous participations and the map is on the website joinallofus.org. Community Health Center is a federally qualified health center. And so we’re joined by seven others that are under the MITRE Corporation that help us with our enrollment sites. And I know that there are other federally qualified health centers that partner with the regional medical centers or the academic institutions as well to really facilitate the Speaker 1 enrollment process. Nice, nice. Tell me about your background because you know a lot. There’s a lot Speaker 2 going on there. So I’m also, so besides being a PI at the, with the All of Us Research Program at the Community Health Center, I’m also a senior research scientist with the Weissman Institute, which is a research education and policy arm of the Community Health Center. And a lot of the work that we do is trying to innovate healthcare systems, access to care, interventions through research education and then trying to include self-policy as well. And so I’ve been here for about a year, but a large part of my career has been spent in the academic institution, where I was a professor within the biology department at California State University, LA. Speaker 1 Wow. That’s awesome. Wow. That’s phenomenal. I know my daughter is very interested in the whole genetics world. So I’ll have to maybe have her shadow you one day or something like that. Speaker 1 be fascinated by it. Every time I say something, she’s like, well, no, they wouldn’t be a blonde baby because of that. And I’m just like, she loves it. She loves it. You know, that whole thing. So that’s great. Well, one more time, tell us how we can get in touch with your organization and, you know, yeah. Right. So again, we run out of the community health center Speaker 2 in Connecticut. This is our website that you can join to learn more about the program and it actually connect you to our all of us program at community health center um our email again is all of us at chc1.com and we monitor that frequently regularly so that we will make sure to respond to you and we also monitor our phone lines 860-852-0890 um so please give us a call send us an email or um look at our website and we’d love to help you become a participant in the all of us research Speaker 1 program. That is awesome. So again, I’m Siobhan Mattingly, Senior Research. I want to be like you. Speaker 1 Senior Living Specialist here at the Heights at Avery Heights. You probably hear tons of noise in the background. That is our amazing renovations that are going on. So we’re renovating our whole lobby and everything. So we welcome folks to come on in and check us out. We’re excited about that. Speaker 1 And until next time, we’re definitely going to have you come back in when you get closer. Yeah, Yeah, yeah. Very interesting stuff. Speaker 1 And I want you to send me some materials too so I can pass them out to the gang here because we definitely have a lot of over 65 here. So we can maybe build that number for you for sure. Perfect. Speaker 1 And we would also love to come in person Speaker 2 and talk more about them in person. Speaker 1 I would love that. Yeah, that would be wonderful. All right. Speaker 1 Well, thank you so much. I appreciate it. No problem. Speaker 1 Have a wonderful day. 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Listen as we provide tips and guidance, including important steps to take during your… **Categories:** Research & Innovation in Aging **Tags:** Healthy Aging --- ### [Positive Approach to Care - Person Centered Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/) **Published:** September 8, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** The Heights at Avery Heights was honored to speak with Teepa Snow one of the world’s leading advocates and educators for anyone living with dementia or other forms of brain change. Teepa along with Holly Taylor-Fry, our Memory Care Director gave information on the Positive Approach to Care program – the training available and how it can be applied in the senior living community environment. Also helpful tips for caregivers. Connect with Teepa and Positive Approach to Care: Connect with Holly Taylor-Fry The Heights at Avery Heights Memory Care: [http://averyheights.org](http://averyheights.org/) ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 So, hello, my name is Siobhan Mattingly, and I’m really grateful to be here this morning. I am a senior living specialist here at the wonderful Heights at Avery Heights. Excuse the noise in the background. Speaker 1 We are renovating a ton of stuff, and so the guys are doing their work today, which we’re excited about. But what I’m excited about is my wonderful two guests. So I have the amazing Tifa Snow. Speaker 1 She’s a dementia education specialist, and she created the program Positive Approach to Care. And I have the equally amazing, sorry, Tifa, Holly Taylor Fry, who’s our memory care director for the Heights at Avery Heights. And I’m grateful that you’re both here to talk about this very, very important topic today. Speaker 1 But to start off, I’m going to have you guys kind of tell me a little bit about yourself or tell the audience a little bit about yourself. And Tifa, we’ll start with you. Speaker 2 So I am an occupational therapist by training. I have been in the field for over 43 years. So I’m old. Speaker 2 I’m also over the age of 65. So when we say older adult, I am one. So I bet I’m a young, older adult, as people will say. Speaker 2 I have worked in a whole variety of settings. If there’s a setting in healthcare, I’ve probably worked in it over those 43 years. my expertise and interest has always been in cognitive kinds of things. So when I was younger, I worked in developmental disabilities. I did work with stroke, head injury, rehab. Speaker 2 I did spinal cord injury. I did a little bit of burns. And yeah, my expertise, though, is working with, at this point, older adults and adults who are living with a variety of brain changes, whether it’s mental health changes, depression, anxiety, or mental health conditions, maybe schizophrenia or those sorts of things, or and dementia, changes that are neurodegenerative. Speaker 2 So that’s my background. And I have a company positive approach and a nonprofit, Speaker 1 the Snow Approach Foundation. Nice, nice. I feel like there’s so much more, but I like it. I like it. Holly, go ahead. Speaker 3 Hi. So my name is Holly Taylor-Pry and I have been in the field of therapeutic recreation as my beginning and have learned through working with skilled nursing homes and more recently assisted livings, the need for dementia care. So I chose to kind of go a little more on the specialized field of developing and supporting dementia needs because I’ve seen the great need that is out there and understand that our population is only aging and that there is going to be a great need for educated caregivers. Speaker 3 So I’m very fortunate to be able to be working at the Heights, at Avery Heights, for the past five and a half years and developed and designed the program that we currently have, which is the Burnham Resonance. And it’s our memory care program. And again, my background is therapeutic recreation, but I’m very specialized in the dementia process. Speaker 3 And I’m grateful to be meeting this deepest know in person today. So I’ve been following her for a long time and took advantage of the opportunity to learn more and continue my mission. Speaker 1 Nice, nice. And the key word I got from you, many words, but educated. And that’s what’s important, that education, rather than not anyone can just be the memory care director. Speaker 1 It’s not someone you pluck out of the crowd. It’s someone that has to have that background and education. That’s what we’re here to talk about today. Speaker 1 Tepa, tell me about the Positive Approach to Care program. Speaker 2 Yeah. So I started the 20, the program over 20 years ago, because what I got to happen and what I saw happen in communities where I was working or at a, you know, at a university where I was working, is that we were not preparing people to be good supports for people living with dementia. We were not preparing professionals. We weren’t preparing family members. We weren’t preparing, We weren’t preparing anybody. Frankly, we were saying, oh, it’s awful. It’s dreadful. You know, oh, man, when this happens. Speaker 2 And we weren’t even preparing people living with dementia to live with dementia because we were making assumptions and we weren’t doing careful assessments. And what I found out is there were some very basic sort of key skills and observations you could make that would allow you to be more positive and to do things that were helpful, not harmful. to see things differently and to realize engagement in living is essential. And that’s where people like Holly come in because without engagement, what are you doing? Just waiting. Speaker 2 People are not good at waiting. And so they choose to do things because they don’t like waiting. And when we have to wait, we get sort of ornery. And what we do, I don’t know about you guys, you guys might go to sleep, but I get on when I have to wait. So waiting is not really an option and being forced to do something, not a good alternative for human beings. So positive approach to care is a way of getting permission to engage and to do sometimes very intimate things and sometimes very social things and sometimes very individual things. But permission. Speaker 1 And I love the fact that you hit it right on the nose that we weren’t prepared. You know, I think that people are so afraid of getting training. It’s even like managers. Speaker 1 It’s like, oh, you’re the manager now. What am I doing? And it’s like, all of a sudden, you’re supposed to know how to manage people because you know how to do a specific job. Speaker 1 And it doesn’t work that way. We need to get training. We need to get prepared, especially with dementia and Alzheimer’s. And trying to, like you said, I am in awe of the expertise of someone is just having a tough day, like you said, and kind of acting out. And I’m in awe when someone can calm that down in a respectful, trusting way. Because when I do the tours, because that’s my job here to do the tours, show people around, that’s what I say. You know, we get to know our residents in the memory care on an intimate level so that we can take care of their needs, their needs, not, you know, a book says, oh, at this stage of dementia. No, their specific needs because they’re people. They’re not just people with dementia, they’re people. And like you said, who I’m the most impatient person in the world. I actually bring my phone with me and I always have a show that I can watch now. So if I’m waiting, I put that on on mute and I’m watching it and the line goes and I’m not like, you know, freaking out. So I am, and I can’t even imagine if I, you know, end up getting, I’m going to be like one of those, you know, banging on the table. Speaker 1 Where’s my whatever it is. They’re looking for your dinner. Yes. Speaker 2 They are late. Yep. That’s not okay. Speaker 2 You know what? Yep. Would you rather have tomato juice or something else to get started? Speaker 1 Yep. Exactly. Just like you would anyone. Speaker 1 That’s what I like about our memory care as well. And Holly’s program, because when you go in there, you wouldn’t know it’s a memory care because it’s just people. It’s just people. Speaker 2 Well, and basically they are just people. Yes, you know what I mean? We put labels on people. Speaker 2 It’s like, they’re just people, but they’re little some special considerations that all of us hope we never have to live with. But in fact, we might. You never know. Speaker 2 Yep. Speaker 1 Treat them well, because it might be you. Yeah, exactly. Which is, you’re an older adult. Speaker 1 I just turned 59 since we’re disclosing ages and I’m an older, 58. I always mess up. I never keep track of my age. Speaker 1 I’m 58. So I am now an older adult as well. And I’m leaning towards that AARP. Speaker 1 I’m not sure it’s on the 70s. But the 70s, the new 60s. And 58, 48, right? Speaker 2 Is that what that is? Speaker 3 Listen, that’s why my mission is so important. I need the youth to be educated. We’re all getting there. Speaker 1 That’s an awesome segue, actually. Tepa, tell me, and I think you kind of went over it a little bit, but the mission statement of positive approach to care. Because I’m reading your website, which is phenomenal, by the way. I just want to get these things out there because I think it’s a lot of the stuff you said are very important on that. Speaker 2 Yeah, it is. You know, really, our mission is to help people build their awareness, knowledge and skills to support individuals and a community so that we can have an integrated community. We want a community that welcomes all. Speaker 2 We don’t want to have this. Well, you know, she’s demented. It’s like, oh, where did we get that word? You know, well, some people are living with dementia, some are living with diabetes. Speaker 2 Some people are living with vision changes. So the idea of building awareness, knowledge and skill and optimizing what each of us can do when we come into community. Then all of us are teaching one another what it is to live and how can we work together to make that happen? Speaker 2 So we have a lot of teachers who are living with dementia and they’re part of our training program. So it’s important to have people living with various dementias as part of training, because that’s who you’re going to be working with. Speaker 1 Right. And you’re right. I mean, diabetes, cancer, whatever you have, we make allowances for that. Oh, you can’t have sugar. So we you know, if I’m you’re coming to my house, I’m going to put out a sugar free dessert. we should do the same thing for someone with dementia you know introduce ourselves rather than do you remember me you know i learned that from your your recordings way back when i first started in this industry like 16 years ago i remember that because i would probably be one of those people you don’t remember me i don’t remember i don’t remember you know when you went Speaker 2 on vacation when you were young it’s just like i’ve never seen you before i don’t i don’t know who you Speaker 1 are exactly i know when i go to the mall i have a better uh empathy i guess because you know i’m 58 years old so i have 58 years worth of people and people will come up to me they’ll look completely different and not that i you know i aged as well and they’re like you and they’re looking and i’m like and i’m hoping the key words the key words oh you got kids oh west harford you know my daughter okay so now we can have a conversation but when they come up and go with sandra i’m like Speaker 2 yeah yeah exactly i mean i can’t trust you know teaching at college teaching at a university Speaker 1 teaching another university college we know this work exactly it’s like uh sandra from Speaker 2 the sandra institute it’s like it’s like um tell me more tell me more and i might Speaker 1 Trying to put a puzzle together, right? Or keep walking, right? Anyway, all right, we’ll get back on track. Speaker 1 So back to your website, which is absolutely amazing. Talk about the resources, which there are so many, but talk about the resources on your website. I send tons of people to your website. Speaker 1 I mean, it couldn’t be more comprehensive, but tell me about some of the resources for caregivers and for people that have dementia. Speaker 2 Yeah, so we try really hard. I mean, what’s your relationship with dementia? Are you living with it? Are you trying to support someone living with it? Are you a professional? Are you an organization? And once we figure that piece out, once you say, I’m this, then we say, well, here are some resources. And some of those resources could be a consult, a free half hour consult. It can be free YouTube content. It can be free TikTok content. We can have problem-based issues that people may want to bring up. Speaker 2 We have blogs, we have posts, we have, you know, you name it. And we try incredibly hard to make sure that we have some free in all categories. And then we have very low cost options for people who, you know, might want to watch a webinar or a video or a training segment. So we have things that people can look at. So we have a laundry list of people who are living with various dementias. Speaker 2 And then we have courageous conversations. And so you can watch a courageous conversation with someone living with Lewy body dementia, who says, you know, here’s my big challenge. There are people that come into my house at night and my wife can say all she wants to that they aren’t real people, but they sure look that way to me. Speaker 2 And it’s like, yeah, so let’s talk about what’s helpful for that. I mean, that’s an example of we have those available so that if we have someone who’s like. What is it like to live with Louie Buddy? Click on it. Speaker 2 Find out because that’s somebody living with Lewy body, talking about living with Lewy body with me. And so we can go through some questions people tend to have about Lewy body as an example, simple example. Speaker 1 So valuable. It’s the whole day in the life to, you know, walking in their shoes. But that’s so valuable because I think a lot of times and I’m definitely accused myself of this is before I got into this industry, you know, it’s just, oh, they have dementia. Speaker 1 You know, it’s just like, excuse me, you know, and not thinking that there was someone there, you know, like, and like you said, here’s these people who are courageous conversations, living with it, being able to tell me what, what, you know, what’s going on. And I think for someone, especially the caregivers, I know a lot, it’s the saddest thing when it’s the spouse and especially people have been married 60 years, 50 years. I, you know, it just, it’s so sad. Speaker 1 And how do I, and how do you do that? Speaker 2 You know, like when the person says, no, what are you doing here? Do I know you? I wonder if you know me. Speaker 2 Yeah, I’m Teepa. And the person goes, oh, no, that’s interesting. You know, I’m married to Teepa. Speaker 2 That’s an odd name. You have the same name as she does. And I, I do. Speaker 2 Now let me ask you, is she a good wife or troublesome? Because what it means is, oh, this person recognized, yes, yes, TIPA is a familiar name, but this is an old face. So that tells me right away, wow, hippocampus is having trouble with new data. Speaker 2 Probably has old data. So they can show me a picture of me on the wall and go, see, this is us on our wedding day. And it’s like, wow, she is cute. Speaker 2 Who doesn’t want to hear that? Speaker 1 Absolutely. I like that. I like that a lot. I’m going to use that actually to some of the spouses that kind of lightens it up a little bit. And who doesn’t want to have that conversation? Who doesn’t want to know exactly what the person is thinking about you? And that is, you know, that’s going to be so encouraging and intimate in a way as well, kind of on a different level and learn stuff that you probably didn’t know that they’re thinking about you. Hopefully all positive, Speaker 3 But that’s exactly I mean, sorry, but I just wanted to share that during the support group. That’s kind of the kind of skills I am teaching with the spouses to say, you know, let’s let’s look at this with a different set of lenses and kind of give you a different perspective. And just educating that, you know, you have a historical background to your loved one. Speaker 3 So now we got to kind of change the dynamic a little bit in order to empower you to be supportive of them. And that’s what we’re doing every time. And it’s great. Speaker 3 You know, we do have more couples, TIPA. That’s what we’re seeing most recently. So now I’ve got a lot of date nights happening and they’re a lot of fun. Speaker 3 Yes. Speaker 2 Find out what their favorite music was and where they like to go to listen to it. And you’ve got a good start on a project. Speaker 1 I love the wives, the wives club that we have in our memory. And I tell the new folks that come in, their spouse we have a new resident that’s going to be moving in and I told her I said we got to get you in the wives club because they go on she just lit up I’m like they and they do they go on dates they go on walks they go to activities they do so much and then they meet together I always see them and they’re always helping people out and they’re part of the support group and I think that helps them um like what Holly’s saying to kind of cope with this but in like a positive a positive way as opposed to you know what was me it’s kind of like oh let me help her out because she’s starting this process. So it’s, it’s, um, let’s just gears a little bit. So Tifa, tell me a little about the training for senior living communities. Like what, what do you, Speaker 2 what’s that like? Well, we have several options. We have individuals can do just what we call champion training, which is building your own skillset, building your knowledge and awareness. Speaker 2 So a community could say, you know, we have a couple of people working in memory care. We four classes over the course of a few weeks. And it’s a two hour program online. And you learn sort of what do you do to respond? Why do we turn sideways? Why do we put our hand up and out? Speaker 2 Why do I do this with you? Because if I do this with you and you shake my hand, it means I have permission to touch you. And when I get to your side and I go, oh, take a look over here. We both have something we could look at together. And then come with me using the visual cues, verbal cues. Speaker 2 And so that very beginning thing is just a champion set of courses that we have. And then after that, we have individual certifications for trainer, for coach, for consultant, for engagement leader, because leading engagement is the most important thing that can happen in a community. that everybody be well engaged staff family volunteers administration this isn’t an activities person this is the engagement leader because we got everybody’s got to fill their day and we’ve got to figure out how to match everybody up with needs and abilities so that I’m running something here and the staff member who does personal care stuff can take Mary up the hall and go do what they need to do. And then Mary comes back and I go, I am so glad you’re here. I could use your help. Speaker 2 Let’s move this table over here because Mary needs to burn off some energy. This whole idea of creating special practice that works together. So we train and then we coach and then we also have consultants and then we have engagement leaders. When you put all that together with champions, wow, that’s a powerhouse. And that’s what we look for when we start talking about a PAC designated organization is you’ve got the puzzle pieces coming together and people are working hard. People will make mistakes. That’s the way life is. But we’re working toward this community belief in the value of each human being who’s in that community. Yep. Yep. Speaker 1 And I think that’s what we see. That’s why I’m in love with our memory care. Holly, I’m going to pull you in now. Tell me what you learned from the training. And by the way, Holly is like trying to be all calm over here, but she’s totally, you’re like, you’re like the Beyonce for Holly. Just so you know, she’s like, and she’s going, just so you know. Speaker 2 I always tell her we’re doing a little fangirling thing because the octave goes up one and then the chill happens and then the octave goes back. Speaker 1 I’m going to let her let it out when we’re done. Just so you know. Wow. Okay. You know I adore you. Speaker 2 Here’s a little zen. I’ve got a little zen oil going for you, Holly. Speaker 3 Thank you. I think I’m going to go hit some lavender later. That’ll be fine. Speaker 3 So, I mean, I just really knew that, you know, education is important and we had COVID. And what was I going to do with my time to continue my journey and my mission to basically continue to support those I serve? And I know, you know, TIPA, that, you know, the Positive Approach to Care program was something that I thought really could benefit the industry I serve. Speaker 3 And that is exactly why I took the course. And I felt, you know, it was great because it gave me something to do. I was focused. Speaker 3 I was participating in the mentorship and appreciating the handholding. And yeah, I was. And grateful for it. Speaker 3 The whole team that I worked with is amazing. And knowing that I always had the opportunity to go back for that support is amazing. And, you know, now that we’re kind of getting freer and not wearing our mask as much, I can certainly start to spread my wings and share the education. Speaker 3 And I kind of had to adapt, as we all have said throughout this process. We have to adapt and modify and go where the needs are. So I wasn’t able to do groups in the middle of COVID, but I took the opportunity to kind of do one-on-ones and smaller spaces. Speaker 3 Yes. And I didn’t stop with just the staff. I saw the needs and wherever the needs were, I interjected education. Speaker 3 And that’s how I owned it, you know, because I know that the more you take control and support and the better supports are going to be put in place for those we serve. And I haven’t done it with just stuff. We’ve done it with the family members, the caretakers, the first responders, the administration. Speaker 3 I’m always talking and saying, you know, this is where we’re at. This is what we need to be looking towards and supporting the needs of. And I think that truly is what I’m seeing as far as the blossoming of my program, because I am very proud of what we’ve got going on here. Speaker 3 But there’s more work to be done. There’s always more work to be done. And, you know, the challenge is always going to be there. Speaker 3 So the more people I can get in their ear and talk and train and show and demonstrate, that’s that’s what I’m seeing. And it’s great when I can take that step back and say, oh, it’s working. And I don’t have to say a word. Speaker 3 I can just step back. And that wouldn’t have been true 10 years ago. That wouldn’t have been true 20 years ago. Speaker 3 20 years ago, I was horrified with things. And I was like, what is happening? So I knew that there was a mission for me. Speaker 3 And that’s exactly. So after I did your training, I was super excited to trial it out, of course. And I had one individual. Speaker 3 I could always get her out of her bed. She loved her bed. Loved her bed. Speaker 3 And everybody knew it. And we supported that to a point, you know, she had to get up for meals. That was important. I should say prior to this, she only ever ordered a hamburger for a meal because that’s all that was familiar to her. So I took all of that and, you know, put that in the back of the head and said, okay, let’s, let’s, let’s make a different trajectory here. We can diversify a little bit. Speaker 3 10 minutes it would take I could easily I could cajole her it would take me 10 minutes absolutely I could get her going the staff would always know come to me if you need support I’m here for you let’s you know work on this together if they can’t get her going hey Holly we can’t get we can’t get Jean up today so okay no problem this is my opportunity I get to work on my skills I Speaker 2 You have to practice my students. Speaker 3 That’s exactly what it was. I was so excited. I’m like, I can’t wait. Speaker 3 I can’t wait to see how this is going to go. And I walked in there like, ring the bell because we got to get her washed up and everything. I said, okay. Speaker 3 And I’m prepared. I’m like, okay, this is great. Here we go. Speaker 3 Sure enough, there she is. I said, good morning. I put my hand up. Speaker 3 I said, it’s Holly. And I put my hand out. Sure enough, she reached right forward. Speaker 3 I had her up. We walked right to the bathroom. We’re going to come right on over here. And she’s like, okay. I rang the bell. They’re like, what’s wrong? I’m like, no, she’s there. They’re like, what are you talking about? So they’re like, that was like a minute and a half. I said, I know. I worked on my skills. I said, look what’s happened. And they’re like, that’s amazing. Speaker 3 So I was over the moon. And just from that minute on, I’ve been like going like gangbusters to just impart the knowledge and share the education because there is a better way. Speaker 2 And, you know, yeah. So here you go. So have you been able to get anyone else to help Jean in the way you help Jean so that they don’t need to call Holly? Speaker 3 Yes. You’re not going to believe this. Yes. Yes, exactly right. Speaker 3 I did. Because honestly, that was the last time they ever did. Speaker 2 Isn’t that exciting? For me, that is the most exciting thing is when they come in and say, Speaker 3 guess what? It worked. I was excited to share the story. I’m like, she’s gonna love this. Speaker 2 You got it. Yeah, that’s a huge story. Because it’s not about you becoming the Lone Ranger. Speaker 2 It’s about you building the team. And that’s what we believe so strongly in is the need to support one another to get better. Because this disease is not going anywhere fast. Speaker 2 And we’re going to have a whole lot more folks that need our help for a long time. I mean, this is so complicated. You know, we talk about dementia. Speaker 2 It’s a great big umbrella. We have umbrella cards on our website for free because there’s about 120 different conditions under those umbrellas. Speaker 1 So, you know, no quick fix here. I think the hardest that I see is when someone’s young. You know, it is really hard. It is super hard. 59 years old. About 19. Oh, yeah. Wow. About 27. Speaker 2 Wow. Yeah. Yeah. And so I think, you know, what we know about dementias, we think they’re for people over the age of 50 or so and it’s like oh no I work with folks who are 40, 30, 22. I mean the reality is this condition is not just about getting older although you know that’s a high risk factor. There are other things that come into play so yeah it’s super important that realizing we can run into this anywhere. So maybe having some skills might come in handy. Yes. Even if it’s not dementia, even if it’s autism, or even if it’s something different, it’s a different brain. Speaker 2 And maybe I should pay attention. Yeah. And what I like is, because Hallie’s a train the trainer, Speaker 1 too, that she’s training all of us, because, you know, I’m engaging with people. I had an incident yesterday where someone was wandering, and it’s like, what do you do? And so he’s like, oh, my wife’s over there and I knew that wasn’t his wife I was like oh so I engaged another staff member because I was you know on the tour and I was like hey he needs to go you know and just like you know keeping him a part of it and not just doing that you’re in the wrong place what are you doing you Speaker 2 know just oh you were thinking that was your wife yes oh she’s over there okay yeah I like her you are you know what though I think you know what I’m gonna have you work with with Holly here because I’m pretty sure I saw your wife. Your wife is married, right? Yeah. Yeah. You know what? I’m pretty sure Holly, take John because I think John is looking for down this way. But you know, that woman does sort of look like her. Yeah. Yeah. So it’s just to have that training myself, Speaker 1 because, you know, if I’m walking around, I’m not just going to walk over somebody or if someone is in need, I need to react as opposed to just, oh, that’s not my job, you know, because people it’s not safe. This person’s not in the right spot in, you know, he can get distressed. Yeah. So, so it’s, so it’s important. Let’s give some advice. I’ve got some wealth of information here and knowledgeable people. We’ll start with Holly. Holly, what advice can you give to caregivers? What’s like that one, one thing? And we’ve had a lot of good stuff here for sure, Speaker 3 but what’s the advice you can give? The advice I have is, is basically, you know, go into it with planning on making a difference every day, no matter how small. I mean, it can be making someone smile. It could be helping someone who’s feeling distressed and anxious. And how can we, you know, turn that around? Is it offering them a change of scenery? Is it offering them a cup of tea? It’s the small things that make the biggest impact at times. And I think that’s really what I would impart to a caregiver that, you know, you don’t have to solve the whole puzzle today in this moment, you know, take it one step at a time and build from there. I like that. Tifa, what do Speaker 2 you think? Mine is, it’s tough because it’s, you know, one message for everybody, but here’s what I’d say is have somebody ask you this question, how are you doing today? Here, here, or here? Speaker 2 And it’s really important as a carer that we know, how am I doing? And if I’m feeling here, how can I share that? If I’m sort of here, how can I look at that and figure out what’s driving that for me? Speaker 2 And if I’m here, how can I get the support I need moving forward? Because before I move forward, I can take care of this. Because walking into a relationship when you’re here is a really risky proposition. Speaker 2 So if I’m feeling really miserable about what’s happening for you and what’s happening for us, I need some support and help before I come into your presence. Because otherwise I’m grieving you. And yet you’re right there. I mean, you’re not like gone. You’re here, but you’re different. Speaker 2 And so that’s where I will say, let’s pull back on the impulse to help. And let’s pause for a second, figure out where you are as a caregiver, so that we know that you’re in a good place to do this thing we’ve asked you to do, which is support and care for someone. Speaker 1 Yeah, I think, you know, getting the support you need. That’s what I tell all my tours. You know, if you don’t get it here, that’s fine. Speaker 1 I give them resources, get support. You cannot do this. I took care of my mom and we had the same relationship. Speaker 1 So it was even harder. And I can’t imagine if you have a close connection and deep love and years of relationship, you know, it’s way harder. And so get that support. Speaker 1 That’s the one. I did it too late. And that’s how I got in this industry is that I didn’t get the. Speaker 1 And once I got the support, I was like a little kid. I was like, well, you’re going to do what for me? You know, and all of a sudden, yeah, I was making better decisions. Speaker 1 And it was like, oh, you can agree. So, yeah. And like you said, take care of my emotions because I was just a mess. Speaker 1 And I couldn’t go into that room with someone who was, you know, not really, you know, relationship wasn’t there. It wasn’t and not be in a good mood on top of all the childhood stuff. I’m like, yeah, that’s so I pulled back. Speaker 2 Letting go of what’s not possible to really recognize, oh, this is what is possible. Now, it looks like there’s nothing there, but there’s something right in front of you that’s possible. It’s just not what you had before and not what you necessarily want. Speaker 1 We got to get there. I like it. Yep. Speaker 1 So what’s next for PAC? I love saying PAC. Positive. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 No, PAC. Yeah, we call it PAC too. It’s sort of like a group of people. Speaker 2 We are starting to do more in-person things again. We’re keeping virtual. We are not letting go virtual because we found out that people from all over the world could benefit from coming together on Zoom. Speaker 2 I think a lot of us figured that out. But we are going back into the world and doing things in the world. We just opened up our space in Hillsborough, which will be where people come to do some training and learning and experiencing. Speaker 2 And we’re doing some local stuff to try to build the community of teachers that we have here. People living with dementia and their families who folks can come and learn from and then take it back to their communities. Because folks are open to the idea of being a model so that folks can come and really practice skills, not pretend practice skills, but really do it if you want to. Speaker 2 Or virtually, we still have those options and those availabilities, but we’ll be all over the world in 2024. We already have programs scheduled for the UK and Australia and Iceland and Chile and Hawaii and Alaska. Yeah, we’re traveling again. Speaker 1 I love it. I love it. I love everything that you’re doing. And tell me the website. How can people get in touch with you? Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s pretty simple. It’s my name. www.tipasnownospaces.com. That’s the easiest thing. Speaker 3 Holly, what’s next for our wonderful memory care? Oh, wow. Well, I think we’re just going to continue to start expanding and getting back out into the community space. Speaker 3 And we haven’t been able to do that through COVID times and, you know, branching out further, developing more since our population of men has increased. We’re going to continue to grow our men’s group. It’s raining men. Speaker 3 It’s raining men. Speaker 2 Maybe create some specific spaces for them to go hang out that are women-free zones. Yes, exactly. Speaker 3 I saw those women-free zones. And I actually have a male support. So he’ll be running them. Speaker 3 So that’s exactly what’s going to happen. So I’m excited for all that. And we’ll see where our couples clubs can go. Speaker 3 That would be fun as well. Speaker 1 Yes, there’s a lot of great couples. Yeah, agreed. Well, thank you both so much for being here. Speaker 1 I’m super excited to get this out into the world. And hopefully this will, for both of you, help further your mission and your goals and kind of get that out there. And I could be a part of that. Speaker 1 I’m really grateful to interview both of you. It’s seriously an honor. This was a lot of fun. Speaker 1 Thank you. All right. Thank you. Speaker 1 See you next time. Thank you. Thanks, everybody. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Younger-onset can also be referred to as early onset Alzheimer’s.… **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's **Tags:** Alzheimer's, Caregiving, Dementia, Memory Care --- ### [Chocolate Good for the Soul](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/chocolate-good-for-the-soul/) **Published:** December 19, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** We all know that chocolate is comforting to the soul, but it may also be just as good for your body and mind. In this episode, we discover the good news about this yummy treat! ### Episode Transcription+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights is a 43-acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now, this show will provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life’s journey. Speaker 1 From topics related to physical and emotional health, to financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Siobhan. Hey. Speaker 1 Good morning. Good morning. How are you? Speaker 1 I’m great. How was your Thanksgiving? Speaker 2 It was amazing. Was it really good? Speaker 1 Turkey, of course. Speaker 2 Yes, and I cooked. I cooked, yeah. Speaker 1 Is this something normal that you do in a Mattingly household? Speaker 2 We’ve been catering it for a while. Oh, pardon me. We used to cook. My son is an amazing cook, but now he’s got kids, you know, grandkids. So now he doesn’t come over to cook. Speaker 1 They all come over because they want you to cook. Speaker 2 Now I got to cook. So I’m like, ah. But it’s okay because I used to be the cook, and then he took over for quite a few years. So we did the whole nine yards, the stuffing, the sweet potatoes, the turkey. Speaker 1 So is it just now your kids and grandkids? Do you bring like cousins over? Speaker 2 Yeah, my nephew, my sister, my husband’s sister. It was like 17 people. Wow. Speaker 2 It was crazy. And we have a little house. It’s only 1,100 square feet. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. Speaker 1 Where do they all go? Speaker 2 Well, we do like a buffet. And then so some people are in the living room, some people are in the kitchen. Some people are right near the food. Speaker 2 Watching the game. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it’s awesome. Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s fun. We always play like – I think last year we played like Family Feud. This year we didn’t. We just had like music on and stuff like that. Speaker 2 But it’s fun. Speaker 1 Yeah, we do stuff like that as well. I was at my mom’s. She loves hosting Thanksgiving. I did one year. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. This has got to be over 10 years ago. How did it go? Speaker 1 I didn’t know. This is before I got married. I didn’t know what I was doing. Speaker 1 I had a girlfriend at the time. She helped. We kind of helped each other out and did it. Speaker 1 It was okay. Not bad. But I noticed that quickly, my mother, I’ll take Thanksgiving back over again. Speaker 1 I think that was her nice way of saying. Nice try, but no seagull. Speaker 2 Did you have an apartment or a house? Speaker 1 No, it’s still my house. Oh, very nice. Nice. Yeah? Just, what can I say? Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s fun. I love to cook. I do. Speaker 1 Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, by the way. Speaker 2 Yes. Actually, fall holidays, Halloween as well. Those are both my favorite. Speaker 2 You’re a Halloween person. I love Halloween. I mean, when I was a kid, I liked it, of course. Speaker 2 Well, I got my daughter. She’s 13. That’s right. Speaker 2 Of course, this Halloween, you know, it’s like, you know, I didn’t, you know, she went out with her friends. They all met at my house. And luckily I’ve got the Life 360 and I’m watching this thing. Speaker 2 Like where’s, you know. I told her. Life 360 is the app where you can, as long as she has her cell phone on, I can see where she is. Speaker 1 Really? Yeah. I never heard of this. Speaker 2 Actually, I was on a tour yesterday and the gentleman, all of a sudden I heard the bloop and I’m like, you have Life 360. He goes, yeah. And then we started talking about his kids and stuff. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s a great way. Like I can tell when she gets home. Speaker 2 Does she know that it’s on there? Like do they have to be aware? She suggested it actually. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Wow. I could have put one on my little guy’s phone. Yeah. But he’d have to be aware of it, right? Speaker 2 Well, yeah. That’s good. You do. There are other apps that they’re. He’s so smart. Speaker 1 He know how to disengage it. Yeah. You know. Speaker 2 No, she suggested it. She was like, you know, because it helps me to know. Because I was always like trying to like she felt sometimes she gets home from school. Speaker 2 She falls asleep. She wants to call me. Yeah. Speaker 2 But now I can just look at my app and I know she’s home. It’s like a GPS thing. It is a GPS thing. Speaker 2 Yeah. But it was good for Halloween. You know, who knew the, you know, how it would come in handy. Speaker 2 Because it’s scary. it’s dark out there. Dark. Speaker 2 I mean, we have a good neighborhood, but still, it’s kind of like, what’s a good neighborhood though? I mean, nowadays. Speaker 1 You don’t know who’s in those houses. I bought all this candy for Halloween. Bags. Speaker 1 Two bags, but they’re gigantic bags. Yeah. 15 people showed up. Speaker 1 That’s it. Yeah. And they were in groups. Speaker 1 I probably had five groups of three or some configuration like that. And the odd thing is only one group I recognize the kids. I’m looking at these other kids. Speaker 1 I’m like, where are you from? Who are you? And it’s like, oh, no, we live down there and around the corner. Speaker 1 I’m like, all right. Okay. I don’t think I’ve ever seen these kids before in my life. Speaker 2 I don’t know where they’re from. Yeah, our neighborhood is, I guess, what you call like aged out. Like when my son, my son’s older. Speaker 2 He’s 29. And so, I mean, all the houses had kids. And I would recognize all the kids because all the neighborhoods all around. Speaker 2 But now, you know, they’re all empty nesters. And so I don’t recognize any of the kids, you know, except for my own kids. Speaker 1 The last group of kids that showed up, this guy looks like he could have been in college. Yeah, probably. I’m looking at this guy. Speaker 1 I’m like, really? Really, dude? And he goes, well, I go, how old are you? Speaker 1 And he goes, 14. I go, you’re 14. Well, I’ll be 15 in December. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 You look like you could be in college, buddy. Speaker 2 Everyone thinks my daughter’s in high school. I’m glad she’s going to high school next year so I can finally say yes. Yeah. Speaker 2 I remember we were on the beach a couple years ago. She had a UConn sweatshirt on. And some guy came up and he was talking to her. Speaker 2 He’s like, oh, yeah, so what do you think of UConn? It’s pretty cool. And I’m looking at him like, walk away. Speaker 2 Walk quickly. Speaker 1 I’m like, when I was a kid, I remember it was always cold. And the costumes were different back then. So I’d have to have my winter jacket on. Speaker 1 And I’m like, Mom, I don’t want to do that. Gary, it’s cold outside. But I’m like, no one’s going to see what I am. Speaker 1 But now it’s warmer than that. Speaker 2 And even when it’s not, the kids can wear it underneath. And then you’ve got the thermals now, the 32 degrees thermals you can put underneath. Speaker 1 I was like the Michelin man. I got puffed up. Speaker 2 Remember those big jackets? Speaker 1 Remember them? Oh, you kid. How could I forget? I’m traumatized by them. Speaker 2 I don’t even wear jackets now. I think that’s why. Speaker 1 I don’t think they make those anymore. Speaker 2 They do. Actually, yesterday it was very cold. And one of our residents had a huge one. Speaker 2 I think it was a North Face. I mean, it was cold yesterday. But he was like, I mean, this is a huge. Speaker 2 It was a huge coat. But they’re nicer now. They’re not as, you know, yeah. Speaker 1 They’re more stylish. Speaker 2 Yeah, very stylish, yeah. Speaker 1 What’s going on over at Avery Heights? Speaker 2 So we have a lot of education that we do. We talk about, you know, we had the series on Hollywood. So Hollywood, the beginning, how it began. Speaker 2 And we had a four-week series on that. Tomorrow we’re doing something on mindfulness and gratitude. We got the national parks we did a series on. Speaker 2 Next year we’re doing a celebrity. Actually, I should probably have you come judge that. We’re doing a celebrity, you know, cooking demonstration. Speaker 2 And whoever wins, actually that meal will end up on the actual – actually, I should have you cook, I think. Oh, I know. Let me tell you, mother. Speaker 1 I’ll taste. You need a taster, I’ll do that. Speaker 2 Yeah. So lots of fun stuff that we have in terms of education. And so just want to let people know that, that there’s – it’s important to work the mind. Speaker 2 Yeah. Of course. Yeah. Speaker 1 What do you think? Today’s topic is interesting. Speaker 2 Yes. Chocolate. Yes. Speaker 2 It’s part of our promise in the introduction. This is on the physical and emotional health. So chocolate. Speaker 1 It’s so interesting. I, this is many years ago. I’m divulging now personal story, but it’s kind of funny. Speaker 1 I had a girlfriend who chocoholic. Yeah. White chocolate, milk chocolate, dark chocolate, any kind of chocolate. Speaker 1 And it really affected her mood. If she wasn’t having a good day, she’d have some chocolate and it would put her in a good mood. Yeah. Speaker 1 So is chocolate even good for you? Speaker 2 It is. It’s believed to be high. Speaker 1 I’m sorry. Let me interrupt you. Does it really also have a psychological effect? Speaker 2 Yes, it does. Yep. Yeah. Speaker 1 So it was on the subject. Speaker 2 Yeah, the serotonin in there. It raises that. That’s why people do it for Valentine’s Day because you give them chocolate. Speaker 2 They’re eating the chocolate. They get happy and they remember, oh. Is that why? Speaker 2 Gary gave me these chocolates. I will call him back. Speaker 1 Make no doubt. Speaker 2 I won’t ghost him. All right. I will let him come back in the house. Speaker 1 Flowers, chocolate. Jewelry always does something around Valentine’s Day. Speaker 2 It does, but I think the chocolate is more longevity to it in terms of remembering it. Because the jewelry, you do, you put it on, you remember, but it’s the psychological effects of it. You say so. Yeah. Speaker 1 All right. Are there specific types of chocolate that are better for you than others? Speaker 2 Yes, yes. So it should be 70% Keiko should have it. So the first ingredients on the chocolate should be chocolate or keiko or cocoa. Speaker 2 If that’s not the first high fructose corn syrup, that’s not the chocolate. Usually, I think it’s, I hope I pronounced this right, Jaredelli chocolate, Godiva chocolate. Those are where you’re going to get, yeah. Speaker 2 So 70 or above what they say keiko level is what you need to have. Speaker 1 Godiva is not cheap though. Speaker 2 No, no. And you don’t need a lot. It’s one to two ounces, one to two ounces. I know it’s like this is all comes from like the blue zones, the blue zones of happiness where you have those places. Speaker 2 There’s nine places in the world where people live healthy, and these are the things that they do. So it’s going back to that red wine. Sometimes when I do these presentations, they’re like, oh, red wine. Speaker 2 I’m like, no, no. You’re not partying. You’re not going to wake up the next day and not remember what you did. This is a little shot glass of red wine every day, and that’s it. Speaker 2 And that helps your blood and your flowing and so forth. So the same thing with chocolate. It’s just one to two ounces. Speaker 1 I love red wine. I’m craving red wine, and now I’m hungry. I want chocolate. But I don’t want a Hershey bar. No, no. Speaker 2 You want the higher – and generally it’s not too bad. You can get that at like Big Y or something. It’s not too, too bad. Speaker 1 Like Munson’s or – Speaker 2 Maybe. You got to watch. You got to read. Speaker 2 And I think they have the little ingredients labels where you can see. And you want to have that, again, that high level of Keiko. But the first ingredient should be – it shouldn’t like – you shouldn’t have it with raspberry filling, which they’re delicious by the way, or marshmallow filling. Speaker 2 That’s not what we’re talking about. But Munson’s does sell chocolate, just the pure chocolate. No, no. Speaker 1 I want to reach this peanut butter cup right now. Speaker 2 No, no. No. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 That is not going to do it. Speaker 1 You got your chocolate in my peanut butter. You got your peanut butter in my chocolate. Two great tastes in one. Oh, I’m sorry. I’m going off. Speaker 2 It has to have, because what this does is that it’s a high levels of antioxidants. And that helps, obviously, to protect your cells. It protects the damage. Speaker 2 And it helps to help from inflammation. It helps to have your brain function. It beats your immune system. Speaker 2 Your cardiovascular health. How much? Speaker 1 How much do you eat of this? I mean. Speaker 2 One to two ounces. Yeah. Speaker 1 That’s it? Speaker 2 That’s it. Every day, though. Every day. just a little bit that’s all you need and it does all that it does all that Speaker 1 you said there’s some health reasons to eat chocolate yeah definitely Speaker 2 so it can lower your blood pressure there’s a substance in the chocolate called flavanols or flavonoids and that’s actually the antioxidant it produces antioxidants and that’s the cocoa at work it prevents liver damage it keeps your heart healthy it makes you feel good like we talked about the valentine’s day it has the mood lifting chemicals in the brain that serotonin that kind of lift you up and make you feel good It boosts your brain power. So that improves your blood flow. So a lot of people actually think it helps with mild cognitive impairment because it’s that blood flow that’s getting to the brain and improves your cognitive function in older adults, which is great. Speaker 2 And it renovates your blood cells. It kind of helps with your cells and all that stuff. I’m not a doctor, so don’t ask any deep questions on any of that. Speaker 1 You’re justifying no reason for me to go out and have some chocolate, some high-quality chocolate. Speaker 2 High-quality chocolate. Yeah, just a little bit. Yep, it’s good for you. That’s good for you. Speaker 1 How about for your teeth? Speaker 2 Actually, it’s funny. It is good for your teeth. What it does is there are chemicals that help to fight the bacteria and the organisms in your mouth. Speaker 2 So it can neutralize. And so it helps with bad breath. And it helps with your enabble. Speaker 2 And it helps with your cavities as well. Believe it or not. I know. Speaker 2 But again, it’s just a little bit. Come on. You can’t sit there with your Halloween candy bag. Speaker 2 It’s just a little bit. Yeah. Speaker 1 It doesn’t cause cavities. You’re saying it helps with cavities. Speaker 2 Everything in moderation. Just like with the wine. If you’re drinking the whole bottle, that’s not the point. Speaker 2 It’s just a little shot glass. So don’t go home and go, Siobhan said, with your bag of chocolate in your bottle of wine. And Siobhan said. Speaker 1 I’m going to say, you just justified it for me. Speaker 2 I’m going to get calls from your family, from your loved ones. What did you tell him? Speaker 1 I’m believing. I’m taking that ball. I’m running with it as far as I can go. Speaker 1 Bringing in some chocolates this week. High quality chocolates. The Ghirardellis. Speaker 1 Yeah. Or Jared Delly. The Godiva. Speaker 1 Oh, Godiva’s. Oh, that’s number one on my list. Yeah, that store. But Godiva’s, they’re moving out of the United States though, right? Speaker 1 Really? Yeah, they’re closing down. There’s not a Godiva in the mall anymore. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 They closed. Speaker 2 I think it’s all stores. I think it’s challenging. I mean, I think Amazon just makes it super challenging. Speaker 2 I mean, I try to go to the mall to shop now and you just can’t. And then you go online and you have all the selection. Even like, you know, store, any of the department stores. Like they have the, you know, four or five dresses there. Speaker 2 And then you go online and it’s all there. I mean, you have it. I just, I really think that shopping in stores is just going to, I mean, retail just struggles. Speaker 2 You know, so sad when Lord & Taylor closed in the mall. I mean. Speaker 1 Look at all the jobs that are being lost. Speaker 2 Yeah. And the mall just has weird hours. You ever go to the mall now? It’s like some stores open at 10, some stores open at 11, some stores don’t, you know, don’t open at all. Speaker 1 And the leases there are sky high. Yeah. Speaker 2 Sometimes the clothes, you go there, you know, oh, the mall closed at 930. Well, be careful because you’ll go there and half the stores will be closed. Speaker 1 in the 80s when I was a teen. We used to hang out Speaker 2 at the mall. Yeah. Yeah. I won’t tell you the restaurant there didn’t do a lot of carting. Speaker 2 I’m just saying. The restaurant you went to? The restaurant at the mall didn’t do a lot of carting. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m just saying. I’m just saying. Speaker 2 You go to the movie theater and you watch Rocky Horror or Pink Floyd. Yeah. I saw the first Star Wars there. Now I’m dating myself, right? Speaker 1 Yeah. That was in the late 70s. Speaker 2 Well, you don’t have to say. Speaker 1 We all know when Star Wars Speaker 2 Not everyone. Speaker 1 Remember Tom McCann and the pie plate? Speaker 2 Buster Browns. Speaker 1 Buster Browns. Oh, Brown Derby. Speaker 2 I was singing Buster Browns to my stepdaughter the other day, and she’s looking at me like she was talking about shoes. And I was like, get a Buster Browns. Like the neatest shoes in the town. Speaker 2 I do. I do. They’re Buster Browns. Speaker 2 She had no idea. She’s like, what is wrong with you? She goes, it’s a nice jingle. Speaker 1 Tom McCann. Speaker 2 Tom McCann. Yeah. Those are the stores. Yeah. Speaker 1 There’s probably some non-benefits to chocolates. Speaker 2 Yes, yes, definitely. So lots of sugar. So that’s why you got to be careful on that content. Speaker 2 If it says high fructose corn syrup or sugar is the first ingredient, you don’t want that. You want cocoa, cacao, or chocolate to be the first ingredient. Diabetes. Speaker 2 There are some studies that say that it helps with diabetes. Again, the moderation. But obviously, if you’re eating too much of it, it’s going to hinder you. Speaker 2 Anxiety. Obviously, it’s got some caffeine in it, so it can cause you to have anxiety. weight gain again but it’s funny because there’s some studies that shows that you can lose weight Speaker 1 again it’s the way you do it it’s it’s i want to see this i want these studies you want this i want Speaker 2 the study i will send you the links um and but you should test it out too you know um to see if it’s good for you just because i’m saying all these things i remember someone told me i should drink a coca-cola for my migraines and oh my gosh it made my migraine worse it just it just made it oh it just heightened it so for me that doesn’t work and then someone’s oh drink a cup of coffee Right. I’ve heard that. Doesn’t work for me. Doesn’t work for me. Green tea works for me. That caffeine and green tea is the right kind of caffeine. So what I’m saying is test it out. Try it for a couple of days, a little bit of chocolate. And if you’re having the negative results, don’t get discouraged because there’s all the genetic testing now where you can figure out what medicine is good for you, what is good for you. For me, I know my blood type doesn’t do well with whole wheat sometimes or white flour. So you have to really, we’re all individuals. That’s what we’re learning now. Speaker 2 We’re not robots. We’re not one size fits all. So be careful and test it out. Speaker 2 And then if it doesn’t work for you, then chocolate’s not your thing. Speaker 1 Well, white chocolate. Don’t cry. No. Speaker 2 You look so sad. I want chocolate to be my thing. Not white chocolate, no. White chocolate? Dark chocolate. Speaker 1 I love – that’s my favorite. Speaker 2 Dark chocolate’s the key. Yeah. Speaker 1 Love dark chocolate. Speaker 2 I don’t even know who invented white chocolate. Speaker 1 What is that? Speaker 2 I like it. I actually like it. Speaker 1 It’s okay. Look, if I had to eat it, if it was here in front of me, I would eat it. But it would be my first choice if you had all these different chocolates. It would be my last. Speaker 2 I like white chocolate macadamia and nut cookies, the Petritch Farm ones, the soft ones. Speaker 1 You have to talk about food. My stomach was growling a long ago. Speaker 2 I’m always talking about food. Speaker 1 I know. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 What’s Tim up to right now? Speaker 2 I don’t recall him. Speaker 1 Stop there on my way home. Speaker 2 Yeah. Tim! We should be on Uber Eats, yeah. Speaker 1 Actually, you could stop there on your way home. I know I could. I live pretty close to it as it is. Speaker 2 Just call first. Don’t scare me. Speaker 1 Folks, you are – this is too funny. You’re listening to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Okay. Why then – is there a psychological reason to this? Why do we crave chocolate? Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s like any kind of craving. It’s something’s lacking in our body. I had a friend of mine that actually used to – she stayed over at my house for a while. Speaker 2 She used to go outside and eat dirt. And I’m like, what is going on? Yeah, yeah. Speaker 2 Her body was craving something because she was lacking in some type of nutrients, iron. I think it’s an iron deficiency. It makes you crave dirt. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 So the same thing with chocolate. It’s something that’s missing in your body. And because of that, you have a strong craving for chocolate. Speaker 2 Usually, it’s like a magnesium deficiency that you might be having. Yeah. Speaker 1 I get that with coffee. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. I crave coffee. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. And sometimes that is because you’ve had it for so long. Speaker 2 It’s like anything. So your body, now it needs it. It needs to have it. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 When did it get so popular, chocolate? So chocolate became popular way back in the 17th century. But it was only for royalty. Speaker 2 And that’s like anything, right? Anything. It’s like the iPhone, right? Speaker 2 We didn’t even hear the iPhone until it was iPhone 3. That’s right. Because it’s for people that have money. Speaker 2 So it was for royalty. And it actually was for medicine back in the day. It wasn’t used for sweets or Valentine’s Day. Speaker 2 It was actually for medicinal purposes. Yeah. It’s like ketchup. Speaker 2 Ketchup was invented for medicinal purposes. If you look that up, yeah. Ketchup originally was – I can’t remember what it was for, but it was for medicinal purposes. Speaker 1 I never even heard that. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Ketchup was – that’s how it was – yeah. Speaker 2 That’s not like an old wives tale, is it? I think it was for your stomach. I think it was for like diarrhea. Speaker 2 No, it’s not. Yes. What does ketchup have to do with diarrhea? Speaker 2 It’s something with the mixture of it, with the tomatoes and the vinegar. Talk about sugar. There’s a lot of sugar in it. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. But I think that’s what it was for originally. And now we use it on fries. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 And our stomach doesn’t hurt after, right? Speaker 1 No. In fact, I want more ketchup. Speaker 2 Exactly. Yeah. What about something like hot chocolate? Speaker 2 No, stop it. With whipped cream and sprinkles? Sure. Speaker 1 I didn’t say that. You said that. Speaker 2 You might as well add all that. Speaker 1 Or chocolate sauce that you put on ice cream. Can you melt this chocolate and can you get the same effects on it? Speaker 2 Oh, that’s anything that you’re, what is it, compromising the integrity of it. Don’t I sound cool? I sound cool today. Speaker 2 Compromising the integrity of it can decrease its value. I’m going to start charging you. I’m charging you now. Speaker 1 Book of knowledge over here. Speaker 2 I’ve learned a lot in my 21 years of senior living around lots of nurses and doctors. What you know about chocolate alone. I do a whole presentation on it. Speaker 2 You probably could. Yeah, it’s really fun. You might get hired. Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s really fun. Speaker 1 I’m craving chocolate as I sit here talking with you. Speaker 2 What else can you do with chocolate, though? Well, actually, it’s funny. The other day, what did I make my daughter? Speaker 2 It actually was really good. I actually melted chocolate, and I made her like this little dish with the chocolate, and I melted it on top of the whipped cream, and she loved strawberries. That’s what I did. Speaker 2 I cut up a bunch of strawberries, and then I put the whipped cream on top, and then it just looks so plain. But I don’t have a lot of sweets in the house on purpose so that we don’t have it. So she had Halloween candy. Speaker 2 So I went and got the Hershey’s and I melted it and I sprinkled it on top. And she was very happy. So they were little kids. Speaker 2 I love the way they eat. For some reason, they just get it all over their mouths. She’s going to kill me, actually, now that I’m saying this. Speaker 2 But I go right back to you can’t have much of it. Speaker 1 Everything is in moderation. Yes. This is a small quantity. Speaker 2 Yes, very small. Speaker 1 And now we do a small quantity. It’s the finer chocolates. Yes. Not the Hershey chocolate. No. Or the Nestle chocolate. Speaker 2 No, no, no. Speaker 1 No, no. Speaker 2 And you have to be careful too because like I said, your body type might not be able to handle it. You might not be able to do it. Speaker 1 Is there any study that seniors gravitate more towards chocolates than the youth or? Speaker 2 I don’t know. I think for my daughter it’s funny because she struggles like we all do. I struggle with my weight. Speaker 2 Everyone does. And so I do. I do. Speaker 1 I do. Speaker 2 And so she actually, but she moderates herself now. I think kids are different. I mean, she’s 13 and she’ll, you know, she still has her big bag of candy. Speaker 2 I know when I was her age and if I, you know, trick or treating, that stuff would be gone. I mean, you figure out, you know, this is way back in October 30th. I mean, it would probably be gone the next week. Speaker 2 But for her, you know, she’ll even say to me, oh, you know, I had a ginger ale today or I had chocolate today or even, you know, the strawberry thing. You know, it’s kind of strawberries are healthy. I didn’t add sugar to the strawberries, which was good. Speaker 2 So it’s kind of healthy. Oh, I did sprinkle raw sugar on top of it. It was so pretty. Speaker 2 I took a picture of it with the chocolate serve. But even that, like, you know, she’ll have that one night, but she won’t the next day. She won’t have dessert or even for two days. Speaker 2 She’ll say, no, I had dessert a couple of days ago. So I think, yeah, I think anything in moderation. And I think we have to teach our kids that. Speaker 2 I think there’s a lot of, you know, overindulgence, I think. And I think the world, you know, can teach you that. I mean, through commercials and so forth. Speaker 2 And, you know, it’s, you know, be happy and do whatever you want. I think we have to teach ourselves moderation. I think it tastes better, you know, if you’re not every day. Speaker 2 You know, after a while, it’s just you’re just eating it. You’re not really even enjoying it. You’re just putting it in your mouth. Speaker 2 And so I think moderation is key. And to your point, do older adults indulge more? I think so because they didn’t learn moderation. Speaker 2 See, I brought that full circle. I got a little bit on my soapbox. You’re on fire this morning, Siobhan. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. I’m just winding you up and letting you go. Speaker 2 Exactly. So that’s why older adults, I think, eat more and don’t have as much, I don’t want to say self-control, but in some sense that discipline because they weren’t raised on that moderation and raised on that mentality. Speaker 1 I want to integrate this now within Avery Heights. Does Tim have this type of chocolate, this high-end chocolate available at his disposal? Is it out in the foyer? In our store. Speaker 2 Well, we actually have – we do have the other chocolate in our store too. Speaker 1 That’s not the chocolate you’re talking about. But we do, yeah. Speaker 2 But we do have the high-end stuff there. And Tim really does pay attention to dietary. It’s all low-sodium, low-sugar. Speaker 2 Well, that makes sense. Yeah, and he has lots of options. Because it is restaurant style, so a waitress will come over and wait on you. Speaker 2 So it’s really – it’s nice and it’s fancy. However, that waitress is still aware – a waiter is still aware of the dietary needs of that particular residence. because we have those listed in the back. Speaker 2 And so it’s more than just a waiter or a waitress. They have to be trained in a way that they can kind of respectfully memorize it but also respectfully tell the person, you know, maybe here’s another suggestion. Maybe this is better for you. Speaker 2 And people can eat whatever they want. But obviously we want our residents to be healthy and happy at the same time. And so it’s just suggestions. Speaker 2 You know, they might point out something else on the menu. Speaker 1 No, Mr. Smith, that wouldn’t abide by your low-sodium diet. Yeah. So they would, wow. Speaker 2 Yeah, and then you talk about yourself, just like I just did. I was talking about my daughter and how we all struggle, but I struggle too. We all struggle with our weight. And then you guys look at me. You’re looking at me again. Speaker 1 I’m telling you. Yeah, maybe because you need to put a couple of pounds on. Maybe you need more sugar and more chocolate. Speaker 1 Eat more sugar. Or not sugar, chocolate. I’m confusing the two. Speaker 1 Because it’s not sugar that is the chocolate that you’re referring to. No, it’s the cocoa. Speaker 2 It’s the cacao. Cacao, cacao. Actually, it’s neat because according to my doctor, and this is what I love about nowadays, is that if you get the right doctor, they’re not generalizing. Speaker 2 So when they look at your labs, they’re not going, oh, you’re this, you’re that, you’re this pound. As a woman who’s in her 50s, who wears your height, you should weigh this. And I got that my whole life, and I could never achieve that weight. Speaker 2 What I love now is that my doctor looks at me and she goes, you’re good. Or she might say, you need to put on a couple of pounds. Speaker 1 So you struggled with your weight at one time. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Well, struggling in the other. It was very thin. Speaker 2 Yeah. And there’s always that. But there was always that thing where every time I went, it was like, oh, you should be 130 pounds. Speaker 2 You’d be 130 pounds. And I eat. You can ask my husband. Speaker 2 We went on our first date. And he was just like, oh, this is going to be a nice, cheap date. Because we had this whole table filled with sushi. Speaker 2 I got appetizers at a Mame. Then we went for dessert. And he was like, and he tells this story all the time. Speaker 2 He was like, yeah, very, very deceiving. Yeah. He’ll tell people. Speaker 2 She eats, you know. Speaker 1 My dentist, same thing. The guy’s about 160 pounds wet. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s a metabolism. It’s a different metabolism. And that’s, yeah. He’s bony. Speaker 1 Yeah. And I see the guy. I’m like, next time I come, I’m bringing you a sandwich. Speaker 1 And he laughs. Yeah. And his wife works there with him. Speaker 1 She goes, Gary, you should see him eat every day. eats more than what he burns it off. It’s neat to Speaker 2 I’m jealous. I love the fact that he laughs about it and it’s neat to be able to laugh about it. That’s what’s nice is that you can laugh. As you get older, you can laugh when people… My metabolism, does it slow down Speaker 1 your metabolism as you age? Yes. Speaker 2 Mine is slowed down. Mine is slowed down. Mine is too. I don’t eat any different. Speaker 2 Breakfast is key. Just a little bit of breakfast. It doesn’t even have to be a lot. People skip breakfast all the time and they shouldn’t. Speaker 1 You’ve justified me. Speaker 2 I’m having my chocolate. Dr. Siobhan. Speaker 1 Listen, Doc, I’m having more chocolate. Now I have reason to, medically speaking. 1.2 ounces. Speaker 1 You’re going to get me in trouble. Whatever. Whatever. Speaker 1 I’m there. Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. For more information on today’s topic, chocolate, simply go to your refrigerator and pull out some Ghirardelli. Speaker 1 Oh, man. Godivas. I’m sorry. Speaker 1 I’m fantasizing here. Call the number 866-537-1444. I mean it. Speaker 1 This was… Did you hear my stomach growling? I should take patience. Speaker 1 I really should. You really should. I want to be your first. Speaker 1 The first three callers will receive a special chocolate bar with your lunch and a tour at Avery Heights. Again, write this phone number down. 866-537-1444. Speaker 1 Good stuff. I’m going to have a chocolate right now. Folks, for Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Thank you so much for listening to your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Hight. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. So long. 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This episode you will learn when… **Categories:** Healthy Aging & Wellness **Tags:** Brain Health, Healthy Aging, Wellness --- ### [How to Pay for Your Next Chapter – Senior Living: Part #2 Bridge Loans](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/how-to-pay-for-your-next-chapter-senior-living-part-2/) **Published:** May 19, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Second Act Financial Services Karen Nelson, Executive Vice President of Customer Care explains how obtaining Bridge Loan can be used to pay a senior living community. Tips on how it works and resources. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning, everybody, and welcome to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Folks, you know, it is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and of the heart and your next chapter delves deep into these topics that will improve the way that we think about aging and senior living and the retirement years all together along with Siobhan Mattingly I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan good to see you. Good to see you. How are you this morning? I’m very good. Speaker 1 What’s new? How was your week? What did you? I had a cold this past weekend. Speaker 2 It is really hard to have a cold nowadays because I stayed home most of the weekend because you know you don’t want to be out and about even though people aren’t as like covid it rained all weekend Speaker 1 so i guess if you’re going to have a cold exactly you want it out when the weather’s not the best Speaker 2 yeah okay that’s so i stayed i hibernated all right because i was coughing and sneezing and Speaker 1 boy yeah well you look great i mean you could never tell you had a cold yeah i feel much better Speaker 2 much better i think the rest helped to be honest with you so it’s probably the best way to go the best medicine yes which new at the heights the heights is actually uh today actually at 10 45 We’re going to be having an open house. Nice. Yep. Speaker 2 We have about almost 20 people coming. So we still have space. You can give me a call at 860-953-1201 and still reserve a spot. Speaker 2 We’re going to be having a presentation on moving tips. And then we’re going to be having lunch. And then we’re going to have a tour and some good food and good fun. Speaker 1 Every bit of that. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Sounds nice. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s going to be nice. People get a chance to kind of check us out and kind of low key. Speaker 1 What would you say is the number one? This is a loaded question. I realize that. There’s so many questions that have to be added and need to be addressed and asked. What would you say, though, is number one on your list, on the list that people universally, you know, anybody that walks through the door that you know the question is going to be asked? Speaker 2 It’s generally the cost. Yeah. You know, definitely the cost. Speaker 2 Yeah. It just depends on where people are coming from. A lot of times when people have, you know, like we’ve been talking about the series we have here on if they have the finances, then that’s not. Speaker 2 Generally, if they have the finances, the first question is about meals, about socialization, about activities, you know. But if it’s the other way, then it’s either one of those three questions or about payment is kind of the first way people go. Speaker 1 Financial services. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Well, I ask that for a reason. Do you want to introduce our guest this morning? Speaker 2 So this is the second part of our four-part series that we’re going to be having on paying for senior living care. We think this is very important because this is usually probably about 80% of the time this is the first question that’s asked. And so we want to answer that question, and we want to dive deeper, too, into the various ways that you can pay for senior living. Speaker 2 And one of the folks we have on today has become one of my good friends, even though she’s in Virginia. Nowadays you can become friends with people virtually, which is great. This is the wonderful Karen Nelson. Speaker 2 She’s the Executive Vice President of Customer Care at Second Act Financial Services, and she is going to tell us about bridge loans, which is always a tough, tough topic. Speaker 1 Karen, good morning. Welcome to the show. Speaker 3 Good morning. Thanks for the invitation. I appreciate it. Speaker 1 We can’t wait to hear all about you and all about customer care and Second Act. Really, let’s start with your background. Tell us a little bit about yourself. Speaker 3 So I have been in the senior living field for 30 plus years. If you could see my lovely face, you would think that I started when I was 12. Speaker 2 This is true. Speaker 3 I can attest that. I’ve been doing this a long, long time. I have a passion for seniors. Speaker 3 I have been on the financial services end for probably about the last 10 to 12 years and have partnered with the CEO of Second Act Financial Services, a gentleman named Ilyas Papasavis, twice in my career. I love the man so much I came back a second time when he launched Second Act Financial Services. And we have been rocking and rolling since then, helping communities like Avery Heights be able to help seniors and their families when they’re trying to navigate that road of needing to tap into their home as their primary asset in order to fund being able to move into a community like the one at Avery Heights, which I have not had the pleasure of seeing it in person, but Siobhan and I have spent lots and lots of time talking about the community, and it just looks like one of the best of the best. Speaker 3 So I’m really honored to be a partner with them and helping them serve the seniors and families that they serve in their community. Speaker 1 That’s wonderful. Take it from me where I have been on their premises a couple of times and I can actually compare them to, I don’t know, what some would deem as competitors. Although really, they’re not really competitors because there’s really nothing that comes close to what Avery Heights is offering. Speaker 1 And I mean that both internally and externally. You walk from their grounds, from their dwellings, to the service provided by the caregivers. I mean, they’re firing on all cylinders. Speaker 1 But let’s go back to Second Act Financial Services. What kind of services does your company provide? Speaker 3 So when we started the company, we kind of took a holistic view of what is it that seniors and their family members stumble with sometimes when they’re trying to navigate that next path to their retirement community or their assisted living community or independent or any of those senior living options. And we put together an offering that includes helping them if they’re looking at do they qualify for VA aid and attendance benefits. We help with home solutions that can go from helping them to find a realtor to staging to packing to moving to move management. Speaker 3 We also partner with a provider that looks at long-term care insurance policies for them and tries to help navigate that. So those are kind of what I call our adjunct support services. Our primary support services involve being able to help a senior or family tap into the equity in their home by doing what I will call a hybrid home equity line of credit, a.k.a. a bridge loan, that allows them to tap into that equity, access the funds, put the house up for sale, have it actively listed for sale, and still be able to tap into the asset, the equity of the house, to be able to pay, in this case, for the monthly service and rent fees that they would need to pay to Avery Heights while they’re getting the home staged, while they’re figuring out what they’re going to do with their stuff, while they figure out who the best realtor is so that they can get the best price and not feel stressed and rushed while they’re doing it. Speaker 1 All right. So you mentioned bridge loan. I’ve heard this term used in the past. Speaker 1 I’m not quite exactly sure what it is. Are there different types of bridge loans? And if so, what are they? Speaker 3 Well, so I akin us to what I will call a regular big bank. So if you were moving into a community like Avery Heights and you had a home that was worth, I don’t know, $400,000 and you wanted to tap into that, you could walk down the street to your local bank, Wells Fargo, Bank of America, pick whoever and say, I’d really like to get a home equity line of credit. the banks are like, okay, great, and they’re willing to talk to you about it. Speaker 3 But when they ask, what are you going to use it for? And you say, I’m going to use it to move into Avery Heights and pay for my monthly fees there. And oh, by the way, I’m going to put my house up for sale and I’m going to sell it. Speaker 3 And hopefully it will sell quickly. Normal banks don’t like that. And they don’t like it because a typical home equity line of credit has to be open for a certain period of time. And we know we’re part of a division of Liberty Savings Bank. And our bank knows that typically these loans are only open for between three and six months. Why? Because they get moved into the community, they get the home sold, and it closes in that period of time. Sometimes it’s open maybe six months, but that’s generally when, you know, If someone has said to us, well, you know, we need to put a new roof on the house or the kids are like, well, we need to really go in and do some upkeep and upgrading of the house so that we can get the best price for mom or dad. Speaker 3 So there might be some varying variables, but in a typical home equity line of credit with a typical bank, they have terms and it takes a long time. So we’re really quick in trying to help these seniors and their families because we know how stressful it is. We look at the asset of the house predominantly. Speaker 3 We can do these loans and decision them in within 24 to 48 hours. Definitely not something that you would see in a typical home equity line of credit that takes 35 to 40 days at a minimum to even try to get closed. We can fund these loans in 7 to 10 business days. Speaker 3 Wow. So we understand usually there’s a sense of urgency about wanting to move forward with their commitment to the community. And we’re very flexible on helping them get that done as quickly as possible. Speaker 3 We don’t have any limits either. So, for example, if somebody, and I had a gentleman the other day, he called me and said, Karen, you’re going to be mad at me. And I was like, why? Speaker 3 And he said, well, because I sold my house and it’s going to close next month. And I said, that’s fantastic. Good for you. Speaker 3 I’m so happy that you sold your home. He literally had the loan open for 60 days. That was it. Speaker 3 And we don’t care. We’re okay with it. We know that the home is going to be listed. Speaker 3 We know it’s going to be sold. And so we work with that senior. The other thing that makes it very different is our loans are interest-only loans. Speaker 3 So that’s typically different from a home equity line of credit where, you know, in Avery Heights’ place, we would send the money every month to Avery Heights on behalf of the senior for whatever they’ve told us to send. Different from our regular home equity line of credit where you borrow whatever the amount is, $50,000, $100,000, they give it to you all at once, and then you’re obligated for paying back that loan in principal and interest. we only send the money that’s needed on a monthly basis when the house sells. Speaker 3 Like in the case of this gentleman where his house sold in 60 days, we had set up a line of credit for $50,000. He only used $10,000 of the $50,000. So he only is paying back $10,000 when his house closes, and he’s only paid interest on those two small payments that we actually made on his behalf. Speaker 3 I know it sounds a little bit complex. I’m trying to make it as clean, as easy as I can. But we’re very, very different than your typical home equity line of credit from a bank. Speaker 1 No, and I appreciate you explaining how this works. But how do you qualify, though? Speaker 3 So when I talk to folks first, we talk about what do they know, what the value of their house is. Most of them at least have a ballpark. If they don’t, we can always use, I always say, you know, let me look at it. Speaker 3 I’ll look at Zillow and see what Zillow says. And then really it’s based on the equity in the house. We can, excuse me a minute, we can work with anybody that has a minimum of a 620 credit score. Speaker 3 So it’s a minimum of a 620 credit score plus whatever the equity is in the house. And, of course, equity in the house means my house is worth $500,000 and I don’t owe anything, which means I have $500,000 in equity. Or my house is worth $500,000, but I still owe $100,000, which means the equity in my house is $400,000. Speaker 3 So we can lend up to 75% of the equity in the house. And it’s pretty simplistic. Like our bank, our lending chaperones, a.k.a. our bankers, walk them through every step of the way they work. Speaker 3 One other difference is they work with the same banker within our lending area from beginning to end. Again, I’m like a typical bank where you end up talking to four or five different people. It’s not always the same person. Speaker 3 Again, adds to the layer of confusion and complexity. they deal with one person from beginning to end from the time we do the application whether we take it over the phone whether we help them do it online to the point where we’re ready to go to the closing and we send somebody out to their home or to their place of their choice that’s how easy it is like last week we actually met a senior at a starbucks because that’s where he wanted to go close he wanted to go close and have coffee so that’s where we went and met him it’s pretty pretty Speaker 1 easy for us to help somebody. Why choose, though, a bridge loan? It sounds like there’s many different options. Are there more advantages for the bridge loan than the other options? Speaker 3 Well, the other, the things that I talked about, about, you know, thinking that, and I talked to a lot of seniors and they’ll say, well, you know, I banked at my local credit union for 25 years, why can’t I go there? And for the reasons that I just cited are generally why they end up coming to us because typically they don’t want the home to be listed for sale. They want the home to be occupied. They want the money to be used for something that, you know, isn’t just a short term loan of a few months. And so I always say to folks, you know, talk to your local bank. If you have a relationship with somebody, absolutely talk to them. And if they can help you, and that’s the best solution, that’s what we want for you. But what we find, and I will tell you a story again that happened last month was, I talked to a daughter that was trying to help mom and dad move into a community. We talked and she was ready to do the application. She came back to me and she said, oh, mom forgot to tell me that she had an open home equity line of credit with blankety bank. And I said, Oh, okay, well, maybe you can just either up the funds or open it back up or do whatever. And that would be easier. And she called me back in a week. And she said, the muckety muck that I’m trying to have to go through now is crazy. They’re not going to be able to close the loan by the end of the month, they’re going to they said that it’s going to take 45 days. I don’t have that much time, you know, mom and dad need to get into the community. And so because we’re solely focused on working in the senior living space, it’s all we do. And we understand the white glove necessity of helping to take care of this most vulnerable population and their support family with the utmost integrity and respect, that coupled with how we do it makes Speaker 1 us different than everybody else. Karen, is there any type of risk, though, that’s associated with Speaker 3 this type of loan? Not really. And that’s because we’re basing the loan based on the equity of the house, right? So when this house closes and they go to the settlement table, if you will, on closing date where they transfer title to the new owner, we get paid off just like a normal loan against the property, right? So little to no risk at all for the senior or the family as long as they’ve got the house priced appropriately and it’s going to sell in a certain amount of time. Speaker 3 One of the questions we always get asked is, well, how long can we have this open? What happens if It goes longer than six months for whatever reason. The loan is a five-year loan. Speaker 3 And frankly, we’ve never had anybody go five years. We’ve had a couple that have gone a year, but those were kind of mitigating circumstances. One involved a house that was a historic home. Speaker 3 And so the folks that ultimately ended up buying it was a special kind of person, right, that was willing to go through the hula hoops that the city imposed on what they had to do in order to maintain this historic home. And another one was a piece of property with a home in northern Virginia where it was a 34-acre piece of property and a home on another five acres. And the holdup was there was a developer that wanted to buy it. Speaker 3 And so it took longer to make all of those things happen. But typically, you know, the loans are only open. It’s on average probably four months. Speaker 3 I got you. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, Senior Living, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning, Karen Nelson. Speaker 1 She’s with Second Act Financial. She’s the Executive Vice President of Customer Care. You can check out their website online at www.secondact.com. Speaker 1 I’ll give you that website and phone number and all that stuff more towards the end of the show. How much can you borrow, though? Do you have a limit? Speaker 1 Go ahead. Speaker 3 Yeah, the limit is 75% of the equity in your house. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 3 So if you own the house free and clear, we can lend up to 75% of that. So if you have a home equity line of credit that’s open, or sometimes we run into where somebody’s gone and gotten a reverse mortgage, or if they hold a small first on it, we generally roll those into that line, that new bridge loan that we do. That makes sense. But in total, we can lend up to 75% of the value of the home. Speaker 1 All right. Now, what if a person’s got bad credit? What would occur then? Speaker 3 Well, bad credit would be somebody that has credit below $620. So I can count on my one hand and still have a couple fingers left the number of times that happens. I mean, the seniors generally all have excellent credit of $720 or above. Speaker 3 Every once in a while, we run into somebody that might be as low as 650, but we rarely run into anybody because they were frugal people. If you think about the people that grew up and that are the age that are moving into these retirement communities, you know, they were very fastidious about saving and about spending and about not having tons of credit. and they were very fastidious about paying their bills. Speaker 3 I mean, most of them, sometimes we run into a funny situation where they don’t have a lot of credit because they never used a lot of credit. And we have to figure out, okay, well, how do we get around that? But we generally don’t run into the senior that has a credit score of less than 620. Speaker 1 All right, let me ask you this then. Someone’s hearing this right now and they want to get started with the process. What’s the first step you take? Speaker 3 Well, they can reach out to me. They can go to secondact.com, as you said. They can call me directly. Speaker 3 I’m the executive vice president of customer care. There’s lots of times, and by the way, I will tell you up front, I am not the banker. So I am not going to be the person that takes the application over the phone. Speaker 3 But I’m the person that can answer all of their what-if questions and how-to questions. And I’m certainly happy to do that. And they can reach me through the 888-999-7372 number. Speaker 3 That comes directly to me. And I’m happy to answer any and all questions. And then, you know, depending on our conversation, I can help shepherd them towards either our lending chaperones or if they need assistance with one of our other services that we provide, I can help them get to the right people. Speaker 1 All right. Let’s say someone gets approved for the loan. What’s, you know, so they’re in the process. They’ve already gotten approved for the loan. What would be their next step? Speaker 3 So the banking, our banking folks have, you know, a typical list of these are the things we’re going to need from you. They collect all of that information, which, by the way, is minimal compared to a normal home equity line of credit. Once they’re approved, then there’s closing documents that go back and forth that they have to sign off on, authorization documents. Speaker 3 and then we will set up a time and date that is convenient for them and fits within the time frame to want to have the funds wired to the community. And we set up a closing time. We send somebody out from the local market to actually execute those closing documents with them. Speaker 3 We work with Avery Heights to get the wire. Well, we already have that. We already have Avery Heights wire transfer information. Speaker 3 And based on what they have instructed us to do, we will wire transfer the money directly to Avery’s Heights. If somebody says, well, what happens if I need, I don’t know, $50,000 for Avery’s Heights, but I need another $25,000 because I need to put a roof on or I need to go fix plumbing or I need to do whatever, We can divide it out and send some of the money, give the senior access to money directly so that they can fix what they need to fix. And then with Avery Heights, on a monthly basis, because it’s rental, we would send money every month to Avery Heights directly. Speaker 1 I got you. I want to bring Siobhan back into this. I can ask this question for either of you. Speaker 1 It’s the final question I have for you because I know we’re a little short on time here. Either of you have any tips for folks that are interested in this type of loan to pay for senior living? What would you? Speaker 2 I think for me, the main thing is apply. Make the phone call. One of the biggest things I see with seniors and their loved ones is they’re like, well, it’s never going to work. Speaker 2 Oh, it’s not going to. And I understand that skepticism, but make the phone calls because this is an amazing resource. And what I love about what Karen provides is not just for the bridge loan. Speaker 2 They have other resources. So if they don’t work out, they can send them to other places, you know, in terms of veteran services, in terms of long-term care. So it’s kind of a full-service organization that can help you find a way to pay for your senior living. Speaker 2 So I would just say make that phone call. Don’t suppose you’re going to get the no. Don’t assume you’re going to get the no. Wait to get the no. I would think that would be my biggest tip. Karen? Speaker 3 Yeah, you know, I think that, you know, in all of the planning process for making the decision to move into a community and get on to their what we call their next journey or their next step, part of it on the scumbling block side is how do I pay for this and how do I make all of this happen? How do I make all these moving pieces go in the same direction at the same time? And it’s like they know what they want to do. Speaker 3 They just don’t know the path. And so sometimes they end up delaying. Sometimes they just, you know, they just get overwhelmed. What we’re here to do is to help them not be stressed in that process and, again, answer any of their questions. But if they don’t make contact and we don’t have the conversation, I can’t help them. Speaker 3 and then they aren’t able to take that next step on their journey to their best retirement living that they could possibly have. So, you know, I echo what Siobhan said is if they make the contact with us, there’s no obligation to have a conversation with me. I had four conversations yesterday, two with families that were trying to help their parents, two with seniors that were doing it themselves. Speaker 3 Lovely conversations, gave them information to chew on. And, you know, all of them said, let me chew on it, and then we’ll get back to you about it. I tickle. Speaker 3 I just follow back up and say, is there anything else I can help you with? There’s no obligation to talk to us at all. We’re here to try to help them navigate. Speaker 1 I’ve got to wrap this up. Let me give you a website once again. It’s www.secondact.com. Speaker 1 The toll-free number is 888-999-7372. I want to thank our guest, who is the Executive Vice President of Customer Care for Second Act, Karen Nelson. Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living. Speaker 1 Next week, we’re going to continue in our four-part series on paying for senior living care. Our guest will be Family Solutions for Care, and the topic will be long-term care insurance. You do not want to miss this opportunity to learn more about this amazing benefit and how to use it. Speaker 1 Now, to learn more about Avery Heights, please contact Siobhan at 860-953-1201 or connect online at averyheights.org. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening to your next chapter, Senior Living. Speaker 1 Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Financial Planning, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ### [Early Onset Alzheimer’s - Get the Information You Need](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/early-onset-alzheimers-get-the-information-you-need/) **Published:** May 19, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Alzheimer’s disease is considered to be younger-onset Alzheimer’s if it affects a person under 65. Younger-onset can also be referred to as early onset Alzheimer’s. In this episode Kristen Cusato, Director of Communications for the Connecticut Chapter of the Alzheimer’s Association explains the symptoms, new research, and programs and resources for people with younger-onset Alzheimer’s. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community, centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. It is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Speaker 1 Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way that we think about aging, about senior living and the retirement years. Along with the Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Hey, Siobhan. Nice to see you. Good to see you. Speaker 1 Good morning. Good morning. How was your week? Speaker 1 I already know what you’re going to say. I already know what you’re going to say. Don’t even say it. Speaker 1 It was okay. Yeah. Well, that’s not what you say. Speaker 1 Come on. Now you’re playing with me. I should have just said it. Speaker 2 You said it. Speaker 1 No, you bet you had a great week. I did. Yeah. Speaker 1 I did. Now you’re in a week. This is Memorial Day weekend. Speaker 1 Yes. This is your big weekend over at the Heights, huh? Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 So a quick recap. I know you went into detail last Saturday morning. Yes. Speaker 1 What are some of the festivities going on this weekend? Speaker 2 So actually yesterday we had our Memorial Day ceremony. We did it at around 345, so it was right before our social hour. We had taps were played. Speaker 2 We also had the chaplain come and say a prayer. And then we also had some guest speakers as well, including Bill, our director. So it was great. Speaker 2 Yeah. Nice. Yeah. Speaker 2 Good turnout. Beautiful day. Speaker 1 A lot of families. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. It was a beautiful day. It’s always very heartfelt. Speaker 1 I was going to ask you that next. How emotional is this time of year for a lot of the residents at the Heights? Speaker 2 It is. And I think all of our veterans events, whether the veterans event we did for Veterans Day, I know that Jimmy J. actually went around and shook many different hands that day. In uniform, too. Speaker 2 I was there, yeah. And there was some emotion there. And, you know, bimonthly we do our kind of our honoring ceremony for our veteran that’s on our wall. Speaker 2 But there’s always tears, you know, because, again, this is, I’ve mentioned before, this is the time when, you know, a lot of these veterans haven’t been acknowledged for years. You know, and, you know, their service was, you know, we have a gentleman that just turned 104. Wow. Speaker 2 You know, so he’s, yeah, he’s seen a lot of stuff. Actually, I was looking up the stuff that he’s seen. The Hindenburg, World War II, different things like that. Speaker 2 Not the Titanic. I thought maybe it seemed, but that was too soon. No, not at 100 too bright. Speaker 1 But, yeah, all those. Speaker 2 104, but that’s like, he’s seen a lot, and he’s got all his own teeth. Speaker 1 Well, that in itself is quite a feeling. Speaker 2 And they look really good. Is that right? They look really good, yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah, he’s really funny. We actually sang happy birthday to him, and it was hysterical, because you know me, I’m a clown. So I was just like, aren’t we going to do the thing? Speaker 2 You know, you do for little kids. Are you one? Are you two? Speaker 2 Are you three? Nobody was on board. Speaker 1 I was like, yeah, that’d be a long version of that. Speaker 2 But I told him next year, he was laughing. I said, next year we’re doing it. Because if he makes it to 105, he deserves that. Speaker 1 I can only imagine the stories that he can share. And he looks amazing. Speaker 2 A firsthand account of it. Yeah. And he looks amazing. Speaker 2 He actually wrote a book. He actually was honored at the old state house. Not the old state house. Speaker 2 Capitol. Capitolville. Oh, really? Speaker 2 Yeah, as he should be. Yeah, he actually wrote a book. he speaks at libraries and this guy, I mean, you would think he’s maybe 70. Speaker 2 You definitely wouldn’t say, ah, he’s 105 or 104. Speaker 1 Doesn’t look a day over 70. Speaker 2 I’m telling you, he’s got all his teeth and that fascinates me. Every time I talk to him, I’m staring at his teeth. Speaker 1 He’s the Martha Stewart. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Yes. Yes. Yes, exactly. Speaker 2 He’s, it’s amazing to me. And he’s, and you can have great conversations with them. He’s, he’s just, he had one of those old time hats on, uh, barbershop hats. Speaker 2 Uh, yeah. On his birthday. It was pretty funny. Speaker 2 probably from like back in the day when they did Speaker 1 Barbershop. What a spitfire. I’d like to meet this guy. Speaker 2 Oh my gosh, you’re going to love him. You and him will just and he’s got this voice and his stories are like, what is his name? Jimmy Durante. He’s got that voice. Speaker 2 Oh yeah. Yes. Yeah. Speaker 2 I adore him. I’m so glad he moved in. I was like, I’ve got to have him move in. Speaker 1 Very well. Yes. I’m a little excited about this. Speaker 1 I got to meet him myself here. You know what I’m excited about? We’ve got a repeat guest. Last time she was in studio, I know she’s on the phone this time, but it’s always a treat when we get to talk to her. Speaker 1 She’s the Director of Communications at Alzheimer’s Association, the Connecticut chapter in New England, Research Champion. I say we bring her on. Yes. Speaker 1 It’s a name I know a lot of our listeners will be familiar with. Kristen Casado. Kristen, good morning. Speaker 1 Hello. Thanks so much for having me. Thanks for coming. Speaker 1 Thanks for agreeing to come back. I guess all went well the last time we had you on. Indeed. Speaker 1 I still can’t believe that was September. It felt like just a couple, two, three months ago. Speaker 2 We’re coming in to repeat guests. The show is, yeah. Wow. Speaker 2 We’ve made it. We’ve made it. It’s like Hollywood. Speaker 2 We’ve made it. Speaker 1 What have you been up to since the last time that we chatted? Last time that we talked, I think we were doing, you were talking about an Alzheimer’s walk, right? Speaker 3 Yes, there were six walks in the fall. So I was probably talking about how people can get involved. And I’d love to come back and talk about that. Speaker 3 You know, that’s happening again this fall. It sticks across the state, but we have some other things I think we want to talk about today as well. Sure. Speaker 1 And I know that we had your organization, like I said, on in our program before, but how about this? Let’s start with this. Maybe just a brief overview of what the Alzheimer’s Association does. And actually, if you could add, how it services the community. Speaker 3 Right. So we’re a nonprofit. We’re the Alzheimer’s Association Connecticut Chapter, and we’re part of the national organization of the Alzheimer’s Association. Speaker 3 And we provide services and support groups and education classes and awareness to people in need for free. I mean, this is a disease that affects so many. Right now, we’ve got about 80,000 people in Connecticut living with Alzheimer’s and twice as many caregivers. Speaker 3 And then there’s a lot of people who are concerned about the disease and worried about what they can do now to potentially, you know, save it off for themselves. So we talk a lot about how to communicate with people with the disease, how to know the 10 signs, also how to keep your brain healthy and what kinds of things you can do for that. So that’s all free. Speaker 3 And then we also have different events, like we have a lobby day at the Capitol and we have the longest day fundraising and the walk fundraising. and we just do a lot to make sure that people know that they’re not alone and we have a lot of activities for people who have the disease as well which we’re going to talk about because it’s really important at no matter what stage that you’re in that you stay really socially and as cognitively stimulated as you can. All right so for the purposes of today’s show we’re Speaker 1 going to focus on the early onset of Alzheimer’s. So what is considered early onset and then what are the signs and how does this even get diagnosed? Yeah. So really, you talk about Alzheimer’s Speaker 3 disease, right? And we are the Alzheimer’s Association, but we deal with all dementias. And there are different types of dementia. So dementia is the umbrella term of symptom that you have. And then the biological changes in the brain are from things like Alzheimer’s disease, Lewy body dementia, vascular dementia, FTD, frontotemporal, what Bruce Willis has. Speaker 3 So there are different types that cause all those symptoms. So we deal with all forms of dementia and help folks. Most of the people are diagnosed over the age of 65. However, when people are diagnosed younger than that, it’s a younger onset. And early is kind of early in the process, right? It’s when you’re having some of those issues of forgetting names of important people. Speaker 3 And I’m not talking about, oh, gosh, who is that person? Who is that? Who is that? And then it Speaker 1 comes to you. That happens to me. Of course, right? Names of people who are close to you, Speaker 3 you know, your grandchildren, or mistaking one person for another. Or I like to say, having your keys in your hand, not necessarily losing them, but not knowing what they do. What do these do? Speaker 3 What does this do? So it’s kind of a processing disease. Some of the hallmarks are amyloid and tau, which are, you know, biological changes in the brain, biomarkers. Speaker 3 And essentially, you know, your brain, unfortunately, on this disease, does atrophy. So, you know, you kind of lose more and more things that you’re able to do, lose more and more function as it goes on. So we like to have folks who say, you know, go get diagnosed early. Speaker 3 So if there’s a memory concern in your family for you or your loved one, write some things down, go on our website, ALZ.org, find out about the 10 signs, call your doctor, and then make sure to rule out anything else because to throw something else into the mix, there could be things that mimic dementia, right? Like if there’s a B12 deficiency or thyroid issues or depression or if you’ve had a medication mix-up. So make sure that’s all settled. Speaker 3 And then you may have to go through and say, all right, well, let’s do some cognitive tests with the doctor. And then you may go to a neurologist and they’ll find out more. It used to be just that you were diagnosed with this on autopsy. Speaker 3 but now there are ways that you can actually see those buildup of plaques in a live brain and other ways as well but what’s cool and i’ll stop talking because i know i’m rambling is that there’s new research in ways to detect so now there’s going to be more hopefully hopefully we’ll get to a blood test that will help detect these more retinal scans really cool stuff happening in the eyes so there’s a lot of interesting stuff going on do we know what causes this? So there are a couple of things, right? The greatest risk factors age, unfortunately. Speaker 3 Then you’ve got, if people have some sort of other issues medically, like a diabetes or high blood pressure, it’s really important to keep those numbers in check. African-Americans are two times more likely to get this disease. Latinos, one and a half times more likely, because in fact, some of those populations present with some of these preexisting conditions. Speaker 3 Diabetes, for example. There are, if you have one copy of this certain gene, you’re at a little bit of a greater risk. But if you have two copies, you could be at more of a risk. Speaker 3 If you have it in your direct bloodline, for example, my mother had the disease, I’m at a greater risk. But it doesn’t mean I’ve got it. And then we learn other things like women. Speaker 3 It’s a very women-centric disease. Two-thirds of those with the disease are women. Two-thirds of the caregivers are women as well. Speaker 3 And there’s research into why is that, finding that women’s and men’s brains actually treat this disease and process the disease differently. Speaker 1 You brought up age a moment ago, and I’m going to stick to people that are public figures that people can identify with. Bruce Willis, he’s not old. Robin Williams, who had the Lewy body dimension, And he wasn’t terribly old neither. And these are severe forms. Speaker 3 It’s not just an old person’s disease. My mother was diagnosed at 61. She probably had symptoms since she was about 58. Speaker 3 We know people who are 49 with this disease. It doesn’t discriminate, unfortunately. So what? Speaker 1 Go ahead. No, no, no. Please continue. I just follow up questions. But no, I want you to continue. Speaker 3 I just think that it’s good to think about things that you can do to try to reduce your risk. And that’s all the things we want to talk about and like to talk about in June and Alzheimer’s and brain awareness. There are a lot of things you can do to love your brain and try to reduce this risk. The warning signs, though. Speaker 1 I mean, you mentioned, okay, your keys. And you’re not sitting there going, where are my keys? Because, again, that’s something that people will do any day of the week. Speaker 1 But to have keys and go, I don’t even know what is this that I’m holding. Okay, so, I mean, that’s a pretty severe, that’s a pretty drastic warning sign. Are there any other clues that may be not as drastic as I’m holding in my hand keys and I don’t even know what they’re for? Speaker 1 Because that seems like, well, you may have had this for a while if you’re not sure what keys are. But what’s a simple, what might give a hint of a clue that you could be on the onset? Speaker 3 So there are, you know, we have this thing called 10 signs at the class. What are the 10 signs? One of them is getting lost from a familiar place. Speaker 3 So you’re taking a really long time to come back from the grocery store that you’ve been going to for 15 years. Because you’re coming back, you’re not remembering if it’s left or right to get to your house, right? It could be as simple as repeating the same story four times in an hour. Speaker 3 You don’t know you repeated it, but your loved ones do, right? It’s really looking at a change in behavior. So, for example, my mom was a to-the-penny checkbook person. Speaker 3 She balanced everything perfectly. And then we started noticing some math mistakes and cross-outs and bills that weren’t being paid. And that was completely unlike her. Speaker 3 So look for changes in behavior that might mean that something is going on. Speaker 1 Yeah. I mean, boy, I bet you got a lot. You got me thinking. And once you receive, once someone receives this diagnosis, what are some things that, I don’t know, that they should do or that their family should do to put in place? Like, what’s the next step after diagnosis? Speaker 3 Right. So immediately, you know, our hope is always that when you get a diagnosis, the doctor also hands you some resources. So that’s why we really appreciate you guys, for example, letting us come on the radio and say, if you have a diagnosis, if you’re concerned, you can call us at any time. Speaker 3 You can reach out to us at any time because we are here with support groups, classes, and an 800 number. That would be, I would say, call that. It’s our 24-7 helpline, and you can call that with any question about dementia. Speaker 3 And you can call it and say, I’ve got a diagnosis. I have no idea where to start. Can you help me out? Speaker 3 and you can get an hour-long conversation with someone called a care consultant who can guide you and tell you, well, you’ve got to get a power of attorney. You’ve got to worry about this. You’ve got to worry about that. Speaker 3 And at the same time, you should probably get some support group activities going on. And here, let’s get you involved in our GAP program, which is called Giving Alzheimer’s Purpose. It’s for those in the early stages of the disease. Speaker 3 And here are some things you can do. Exercise, try to follow a Mediterranean diet as much as you can, get some really good sleep, those kinds of things. So there’s a lot to do early on. Speaker 3 But, you know, people say, you know, back in the old days, somebody was diagnosed, oh, just put grandma in the back room, turn the TV on, it’s fine. No. People are active. They contribute to society. Speaker 3 They can get rid of that stigma. That’s really important. Speaker 1 I remember when I was a kid, you’d always hear, well, that person’s going senile, you know. And when you heard of dementia, we just heard the word dementia or heard the word senile. We didn’t, you know, then we heard Alzheimer’s. And I think maybe because President Reagan had the onset of it, even while his later stages of his presidency. Speaker 1 But it’s often used interchangeably with dementia. Ah, he’s got Alzheimer’s. How do you know it’s specifically Alzheimer’s? You know, but because there are different types of dementia, and you mentioned some of these, you know, earlier, I guess. Speaker 1 Am I hearing am I hearing more cases of dementia now because we know more about it or as opposed to when I was a younger kid? I’m going to go back into the 70s. You rarely heard about it at all. Why are we hearing more? Speaker 1 Is it more people? Did people actually have this many years ago and they just weren’t diagnosed with it? Or are we just, is it more pronounced right now? Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 3 A, we are all living longer, my friend. Okay. So there you go. Speaker 3 In addition, there’s more of an awareness, right, that this is not normal aging. Like I said before, it was, hey, you know what? Grandma’s forgetting this. Speaker 3 She’s messing up all the recipes. She doesn’t know the name of her grandkid. Speaker 1 It’s normal. Speaker 3 It’s the way it happens when you get older. Speaker 1 But what has me concerned is some of these ages. When you start going, people 48, 49 are getting the onset up. It’s like, regardless of living older, that’s still a young age. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest, Kristen Casado, Director of Communications of Alzheimer’s Association, Connecticut chapter, and New England Research Champion. Speaker 1 She’s got a toll-free number at 800-272-3900. Again, 800-272-3900. And check out their website at www.alz.org slash CT. Speaker 1 So it’s the national website, alz.org. But don’t forget to slash Connecticut so that you can be routed or rooted into the Connecticut chapter. You mentioned retina and scans and a whole host of other types of new research, but is there research for detection and so on and so forth? Speaker 1 What about medications and interventions? Speaker 3 I’m so glad you asked. We have so many exciting things happening in the medication realm right now. Okay, good. Speaker 3 Right now, the FDA has approved in the last couple of years two new medications that are for those in the early stages of the disease. Okay? So this is an infusion drug. Speaker 3 One of them is called Agilm and the other is called Lekembi. And I won’t make you remember that or write it down. Not going to quiz you. Speaker 3 Not going to quiz you. But those two drugs are part of a class of drugs that actually go in and take away some of the amyloid. Flax, which is a biomarker. Speaker 3 So this is the first time we actually have disease-modifying medication since the inception of research. I mean, all the other drugs that you may have heard of that are pretty common are really just affected and dealt with the symptoms. This, these two drugs, are showing, each drug is showing better and better data, and then we have a third that’s going to go up for FDA approval soon. Speaker 3 The only issue with this right now is that it’s not, even though it’s FDA approved, it’s not covered by the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid. So CMS has decided that all these particular class of drugs are not going to be covered. And we, as the Alzheimer’s Association, we want access. Speaker 3 If you are in this process and qualify and you can tolerate this drug, we want families to have a choice to be able to take it or not. And they can’t because it’s now $26,500, I think, $1,000 a year just for the drugs itself. So our question to CMS is, why have you approved every other FDA drug but not these for Alzheimer’s? Speaker 3 So we, as an association, we’ve held rallies in front of the White House. We’re talking with our legislators to try to get, you know, urge lawmakers to help CMS change their minds. We want families to be able to make their own decisions on if they want this medication or not. Speaker 3 And we want accessibility. Speaker 2 And I think there’s a petition as well, Kristen. I think I saw that in my email, a petition to sign as well. Yes, ma’am, it’s going to the president. Speaker 3 Yes, let’s try to make this change. And we’re actually going to have a rally in June, so stay tuned for that right here in Connecticut. We really want families to have access. Look, finally we have medications after all these years. Finally something that could make a difference with these folks. Speaker 1 And I want to talk about June in just a moment. I know it’s a big month for Alzheimer’s, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t ask you about some of the resources that the Alzheimer’s Association can provide to those who not only have the diagnosis, but really their families, their caretakers, because God bless them. And they’re going to be on the front lines and it’s regressive. Speaker 1 It’s not going to get better, you know. And, oh, my goodness, my heart just aches for those people. Well, not only those who get diagnosed and living with Alzheimer’s, but just as much equally for their family members. Speaker 3 It is so hard. Caregiving is definitely the hardest job I ever had. And you can ask probably several people who are around you. Speaker 3 You know, it’s really easy to find people who are affected, unfortunately. So we really make sure that caregivers know that there is that 800 number, that there are support groups. It is so critical. Speaker 3 And even, you know, still today we’re doing them virtually, right? so you can do virtually or in person, support groups are critical to just literally finding out what other people have used. It’s like a peer-to-peer group sharing of ideas. Speaker 3 Oh, wait, you talked to your mom like that, and you kind of skirted around the truth and did a little fib so that she calmed down? Okay, I’ll try that. Or, you know, you’re using that doctor for this? Speaker 3 Oh, great. Oh, your mom has sundowning when it gets dark in the evening? She starts having agitation. Speaker 3 What are some tricks you use to fix that? So support groups are so critical, even just events. So we want people to know they have that. Speaker 3 We also really push caregivers to take care of themselves. You know, we had a big study that came out, a big report that came out in March, talking about the fact that caregivers are really self-reporting what’s going on with them. Physical toll, depression, straight up bad physical health, because why? Speaker 3 They don’t go to the doctors themselves. They can’t sleep because they’re worried about their person getting up in the middle of the night. The stress level is incredibly high. Speaker 3 Every day is different. So we really want caregivers to try to put themselves first and make sure that they take care of themselves as well. Because if you’re not in good shape as a caregiver and you implode, who’s going to be there for your person? Speaker 2 That’s a great point. Yeah, and we see that so often at the community where both parents are coming in, it’s all situated, and then something happens to that caregiver, you know, a heart attack or, you know, some kind of ailment. And a lot of times we see them pass away way before the person with the dementia. Speaker 2 It takes it really takes its toll. And that’s the first thing I always tell caregivers when they come in, take care of yourself. And we get them into a support group immediately. Speaker 2 And, of course, give the Alzheimer’s Association information. Speaker 1 By the way, and I teased this a moment ago, and I think you mentioned something at the top of the show. Talk briefly about the month of June and what it means for the Connecticut Alzheimer’s Association. Speaker 3 So June is Alzheimer’s and Brain Awareness Month, and it’s really a big push to take care of your brain. You know, the weather’s nice. Get out there and exercise. Speaker 3 Try to eat healthy Mediterranean diet. Try to get that critical sleep. As you sleep, toxins are actually washed away during the day that they built up. Speaker 3 Hit the bus. You know, we say try to learn something. Play those games. Speaker 3 I’m a big Wordle fan, right? Play those Word games and play different games. Try to challenge yourself. Speaker 3 Protect your head when you’re biking. You know, wear a helmet. There’s a lot of things you can do to love your brain, and we really encourage you to do that. Speaker 3 It’s just a nice time to think about it. And we want people to go purple, too. You know, show your support for what’s going on. Speaker 3 And also June is a day, the longest day falls in June, June 21, the longest day of the year. And it’s a day where people can fundraise and really honor those who are the caregivers, who have the longest day every day. Speaker 1 Oh, that’s great. I’ll have to get you on the morning show maybe sometime in mid-June. Do a quick segment about raising awareness and everything. Speaker 1 You know, I’m listening to all these suggestions in the Mediterranean diet, which I love a Mediterranean diet. I just wish I could get more than four and a half hours of sleep Monday through Friday. But that’s a whole other story. Speaker 1 How can a person get started and connect with the Alzheimer’s Association? What would you do? What would you recommend for the first step or two that people take? Speaker 3 Yeah, I’ll tell you exactly what I did, and I was lucky to know that it existed. I literally called the 800 number when my mom was first diagnosed, and that’s our 24-7 helpline. It’s 800-272-3900. Speaker 3 You are connected with a person on the other side who is skilled and knows what they’re talking about and can help you with some of your questions, and if you’ve got specific questions about certain things, you can ask for an hour-long conversation with someone here in Connecticut who can guide you on what are my care options? Where do I start? Who are the elder care attorneys that I should contact? Speaker 3 How do I think about my finances, right? So many different things. And then how do I learn how to really communicate? Speaker 3 Because one of the biggest myths, and I know that I’ve shared this before, but it’s just so critical. When someone says something who has dementia, don’t argue with them and don’t fight with them. Go into their reality. Speaker 3 It’s so critical. And it’s so hard because we grow up correcting each other, right? My goodness. Speaker 3 Tests, as a child, you always correct them to say the right thing. We know the right thing is what’s happening in their mind at that moment. So go into their reality. Speaker 3 It’s okay as long as they’re not hurting themselves or somebody else. Speaker 1 That’s great advice. Speaker 3 If they think it’s the wrong day, if they think it’s the wrong season, it’s okay. It’s okay. If they want to vacuum the same part of the carpet ten times, let them. Speaker 1 www.alz.org www.alz.org forward slash ct. The Connecticut toll-free number for the Connecticut Alzheimer’s Association is 800-272-3900. Again, 800-272-3900. Speaker 1 I want to thank our guest, Director of Communications for the Alzheimer’s Association of Connecticut, Kristen Cassato. We definitely will get you back on this show right before, right prior to your walk in September. Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living. To learn more about Avery Heights, please contact Siobhan at 860-953-1201 or connect online at averyheights.org. For Siobhan Mattingly, she is the Senior Living Specialist. Speaker 1 I’m Gary Byron. Thanks so much for listening to your next chapter. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. You will… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") ## [Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") September 8, 2023 The Heights at Avery Heights was honored to speak with Teepa Snow one of the world’s leading advocates and educators for anyone living with dementia… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's **Tags:** Alzheimer's, Brain Health, Caregiving, Dementia --- ### [Healthy Resolutions for Seniors](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/healthy-resolutions-for-seniors/) **Published:** January 2, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** This year has taught us gratitude and how to give thanks for things we would generally take for granted. From friends and family to health, there is so much to be thankful for as we enter the year 2023. What’s a better way to express thanks than by using our gratitude to guide our New Year’s resolutions. In this episode we will cover some great topics for how to stay healthy and happy this upcoming year. Tried and true, we want to outline for our listeners suggestions as to how they can [live each day](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/senior-living-community-moving-day/) more vibrantly than they might’ve even thought possible. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. By the way, it’s never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter, well, it delves deep into topics that will improve the way we think about aging, senior living, and the retirement years altogether. It is time to celebrate our seniors, give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, inner peace, and the courage to never give up on growing. We will discuss exciting opportunities, important resources for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health. Along with the Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly, I’m George Clooney. Speaker 2 I’m kidding. Speaker 1 That was from last week. Speaker 2 Oh, you should have done Batman. I’m Batman. I’m Batman. I’m Batman. I want to be Iron Man. I am Iron Man. I love that. Speaker 1 I am Iron Man. Speaker 2 When Tony does that in the end of the movie, he goes, I am Iron Man. he is i know that’s um uh uh robert downey right yeah he’s phenomenal he you want to talk about a Speaker 1 guy who turned his life around he you go back to the 90s time he did that uh that david letterman Speaker 2 show i don’t know if you watch that on netflix and robert downey you know he goes to his farm he has a farm he has alpacas yeah he’s married he has a where’s his farm oh i don’t remember what it where it was it’s not in california is it i don’t think it’s california with it yeah he’s got alpacas He’s got all sorts of animals. There’s a huge, all sorts of acres, and he’s got little ones, and he’s married. I know he’s married. He’s got kids. Huge turnaround. Yeah. Yeah. I liked it. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 I’ve always liked him. I liked him back in the day when he was part of the, what is it, Brat Pack? Speaker 1 No, no, no. Well, was he? Speaker 2 Yeah, he was with Emilio Estevez. Oh, gosh. Oh, yeah. The whole Rob Lowe. Yeah, Rob Lowe. Demi Moore. That’s right. They were all in The Breakfast Club. Speaker 1 The Breakfast Club. And St. Elmo’s Fire. Speaker 2 St. Elmo’s Fire. That was so good. Yeah. And Less Than Zero. Speaker 1 That’s right. Speaker 2 That’s Robert Downey Jr. Speaker 1 Pretty in Pink. Speaker 2 Because what’s his name? Speaker 1 Anthony Michael. No, Molly Ringwald. Speaker 2 Molly Ringwald. Yep. Good guy. You’re taking me back to my high school. Yeah. Those are good movies though. 16 Candles. Speaker 1 Well, yeah. But here’s the thing. I’m glad we’re pretty. Speaker 2 We got these pins going. Speaker 1 I know, right? Let’s hope the ink doesn’t spread out here. I had this conversation about two weeks ago with a good buddy of mine. They don’t make comedies nowadays. No. Not like those. Like if I were in high school now, back in high school in the 80s, we could go to the movies every week and see a comedy. Now you could talk about the whole film industry where you can watch movies at home. And back when I was a kid, it was like HBO. And those movies came out nine months prior to when you’re getting them on HBO. But I mean just the movies themselves. When was the last time they made a rip-roaring comedy? Speaker 2 I mean, it’s been years. It’s a lot. Well, I was watching this over the holidays. Daddy’s Home. Those are good. With Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell. there’s like a daddy’s home one and daddy’s home two i haven’t even heard of it oh it’s so funny you got to watch it there’s daddy’s home and then it’s basically what they’re both dads and it was that um will ferrell’s the stepdad and then mark walberg’s the actual dad of his two kids and mark Speaker 1 walberg shows up on his motorcycle and but do you remember being in high school and they had high school like fast times at richmond high oh yeah that was a high school movie about being in high Speaker 2 and that’s just one of them and the lines from them too like the iconic lines where you could say Dude was it with Sean Penn. Speaker 1 Let’s party. Speaker 2 Right. The characters had more. Even further on like Jerry Maguire. Show me the money. Speaker 1 That was in the 90s. That was kind of a dramedy. Speaker 2 Comedy drama. A combination I think. There were some funny parts in that. Especially when he was screaming. Speaker 1 Show me the money. That was a whole big line. Speaker 2 Come on Jerry. Show me. Speaker 1 That was a great movie. Speaker 2 I have that movie at home. Speaker 1 That’s a good movie. It is a great movie. Yes. Speaker 2 You had me at. You had me at hello. Yeah. At the end of the movie. All these lines from that movie. Yeah. Speaker 1 Sure. Speaker 2 Yeah. They don’t have any lines. Well, from the Marvel movies, like we were saying. I am Iron Man. I am Iron Man. Yeah. Speaker 1 But that was stolen. Speaker 2 Wakanda. Speaker 1 I am Iron Man. That was a Black Sabbath song. Iron Man. Speaker 2 Oh, was it? Yeah. Speaker 1 I am Iron Man was the famous line in the song. Oh, was it? Yeah. Speaker 2 Oh. Speaker 1 So he just kind of took that, I think. Speaker 2 Did not know that. Speaker 1 I did not know that, Ed. Speaker 2 I did not know that. Speaker 1 Wild stuff. The things we learn. I don’t know. I’m just being goofy. So how was your New Year’s, by the way? It was good. It was good. Did you do everything? How did your daughter enjoy her time at camp? She did well. Speaker 2 She stayed awake. Good. She did well. She was in the lock-in. She stayed awake. Yeah, she enjoyed herself. Speaker 1 And your dinner? Did your sister come over? Speaker 2 She did not. We did a quiet dinner. Okay. But I did stay awake. Yeah, but we had some hibachi. Yeah. That’s the way to do it, right? That is the way to do it. But you can’t. The thing is, though, next year, I cannot eat heavy because you eat heavy food. Well, it’s actually not heavy, but it’s a lot of food, and then you’re tired. Speaker 1 I know. Yeah. Well, you’re supposed to eat during the holidays, right? I know. That’s like the last big meal, and everybody starts their diet tomorrow. Every day. Speaker 2 All day. Speaker 1 I’ve seen commercials for Jenny Craig and Weight Watchers and gyms. Jenny Craig Weight Watchers. Are these like, are they all out? I’m sorry. I don’t know. I’m living. Speaker 2 See, I’m still living in the 80s. Marie Osmond is Weight Watchers, right? Speaker 1 That’s the sound. Speaker 2 You don’t mean it. Valerie Bertinelli. No, no. She does the commercials now. Valerie Bertinelli and Slim Fast. Slim Fast. Yes. I don’t know. Yes. And Marie Osmond. Yeah, they do the commercials now. Yeah. Who else? Anthony Robbins, the more official speaker. He does one of them. I don’t know which one he does. He does one of those. He’s on a diet? He does one of those. Yeah. He does one of those. Really? Those are commercials. Did you notice? Remember that? Oh, Rob Lowe does it too. I don’t know which one he does. Atkins. Yes. Love Rob Lowe. Speaker 1 Why are these people who are pretty thin to begin with? Yeah. Why are they doing it? Really? Yeah. Well, I think some of them. Put Jack Black in. He should be doing it. All right. I’m going to do it. Even like Valerie Bertinelli. She’s kind of plumped up a little bit. Maybe put her on the diet. Okay. Speaker 2 I am not participating. I do not condone this. Valerie Bertinelli is beautiful. Speaker 1 No, no. I’m not saying she’s not. But she does a baking show too, doesn’t she? Speaker 2 She does. And she cooks. I like her show, actually. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 But what I liked about the late, like Kirstie Alley. Speaker 2 She was on, what is it? One Day at a Time. Speaker 1 Yes, she was. Way back. But she was like a teenager then. Speaker 2 She was a teenager. Speaker 1 Kirstie Alley, who just passed away. Oh, loved her. Speaker 2 Right? Me too. Loved her. She was funny. Victoria’s Closet. In Cheers, of course. In Cheers. But she was funnier in Victoria’s Closet. When she got her own thing, that was funnier. She would do Weight Watchers commercials because she fluctuated with her weight. And that’s never like Luther Vangelis. It’s not good for you when you’re doing the fluctuation You want to talk about it? I think he had a heart attack or something like that from fluctuating with his weight. It’s not good for you. It’s not good for you. It weighs on your heart, especially back in the day. What was those pills? I can’t remember what they were called. I think they started with a D. Those pills that they would take where it helps you to lose weight. It’s like the water weight. Speaker 1 Be careful with those things. Speaker 2 I had a friend of mine actually who passed away in middle school. Was it middle school or high school? She was taking those pills. I think they started with a D. I can’t remember the name of them, but they were not good for them. Diuretics? I think it was, yes, but it was a thing. And she took it and I think she had a heart attack. She passed away young, very young. Speaker 1 She died? Speaker 2 Yeah, never forget that, yeah. Speaker 1 In middle school? Speaker 2 I think middle school or high school. Or either, whatever. I know it was in front of, I grew up in Bloomfield, so it was in front of the Wittenberry Pharmacy in Bloomfield. She passed away. She passed out and then she passed away. That’s how much I remember. Isn’t it crazy how you remember stuff from childhood? Like so like every, I wasn’t even there, but I can visualize. Yeah, yeah. And she was kind of heavy set, and I think she was trying to lose weight, and she was on those pills. Yeah. It’s not good for your heart. Speaker 1 Well, yeah. I was going to say, like – Speaker 2 But even now, they don’t have the pills, and people go up and down with their diet. Speaker 1 All those commercials are out now. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, yeah. Who – what’s that? I can’t read that. I’m – Oh, ephedra. Oh, ephedra. Yes. I’m old. I can’t read with my glasses on. Believe it or not. That’s gracious. Stay away from us. It’s like glasses are on and off. Thank you, though. Yeah. Just join me. Yeah. Well, anything like with diet, you have – you can’t do the extremes because you see people. Actually, I saw someone the other day, and I’m obviously not going to mention their name, but they had done the stomach staple and so forth, and they lost a ton of weight, looked awesome. And I saw her the other day, and it’s back, and it comes back doubled up. Speaker 1 All that money wasted. Yeah. And that’s a pretty risky surgery, right? Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Some people just, I think, are just, you know, and I’m thin, so I’m not going to comment too, too much on it, but I think you have to kind of regulate your diet and do it to what you can handle, you know, which is some of the stuff we’re going to talk about. like not with healthy resolutions, not, you know, don’t choose a New Year’s resolution that is just off the wall. You know, just choose something that you can do and it doesn’t, you know, like one of the ones we’re going to talk about is quitting smoking. You know, that’s hard. You know, and that can just be almost like your only one that you do, but get help when you’re doing it and celebrate your small victories, you know. Speaker 1 All right. So today we’re going to cover some great topics. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 As you just kind of, since you led me into this. I segued. Perfect segway. Speaker 2 they’ve trained me well here Speaker 1 well you’ve got a background in radio you know what it’s Speaker 2 a small background in radio Speaker 1 how to stay healthy and happy this upcoming I’m not touching that this upcoming year tried and true we’re going to outline for you some suggestions as far as how you can live each day more vibrantly and maybe even I’m not just physically healthy but even mentally happy Speaker 2 yes these are going to be the ones we’re going to talk about eight potential and you can make them your own resolutions that you can start. I’ll start off by saying that, again, attainable goals. So, you know, and make sure that you break the goals up. So, for example, I just did a goal and accountability group is a good idea as well. So I just joined a goal accountability group last year. And when I joined it, my goals were my budget, were my spiritual health, and my, you know, I don’t tend to forgive people too well. I hold a lot of resentment. So those are my three. But you got to break it up. You got to break. I’m not going to all of a sudden be misforgiving. You know what I mean? My budget, I broke it up. So first I created a budget, you know, and then stick to the budget. That’s goal number one, create it. Goal number two is stick to it. Then you got to adjust it so that you have small victories. So don’t expect all of a sudden I’m going to be – and I did pretty good actually for last month, for the month of December. I was actually really proud of myself. I actually had – with Christmas, I had a nice amount of money left over. And it amazes me when I’m controlling my money how well that works. That’s a victory. Celebrate that victory. Now, maybe next month won’t be as good. This month is my daughter’s birthday. So, you know, maybe it won’t go so well. But I got to look back at my victories. And you got to find there’s always there’s always a victory somewhere in there. You know, yes, you might have done some stuff wrong, but you got to find the victories because the celebrations is going to make you keep going. Speaker 1 I wish I didn’t hold grudges neither. That’s a part. I’ve always been like that. Speaker 2 And it’s not worth it. Speaker 1 No, it’s not worth it. Speaker 2 I write people off. Speaker 1 I’m like, I’m done with it. Speaker 2 And that’s not worth it. It’s hard. I do, too. I like to just write them off. I’m done with you. Speaker 1 But see, there’s no energy. I actually I’m relieved because I won’t try to maintain the relationship. I’m just like when I’m done with you, I’m done with you. And it’s like a weight off of me. I won’t even give you any thought. Speaker 2 But it’s still in there. So it’s not necessarily with that person, but it’s with the next person. I was watching a show the other day where it was a husband and wife and her dad had actually left the family. She had an affair and left the family. And so she was yelling at him because the dad did what he did. Speaker 1 That’s an affair. That’s a whole other arena. But still, that’s a big one. Speaker 2 But still, it’s like you have to kind of like you have to work those things out. You don’t necessarily have to work it out with that person. You can still disconnect yourself because that’s good boundaries. You know, if they keep walking all over you, that’s good boundaries. But you still have to work that out because it will come out in your next – the next person could do something very – all this kid did was in the show that I was watching. He – oh, he had dinner with his publicist who happened to be attractive. Now, granted, that is something to get uncomfortable with. But she was just like off the wall. And I’m like that too. I’m a jealous person. So I get it. But she was off the wall with jealousy because, but, but that was fueled with the jealousy Speaker 1 from the dad. Speaker 2 It was fueled with that. Speaker 1 Because if you had a business meeting and a person just happens to be attractive, that’s Speaker 2 irrational. But she was irrational because she had, she hadn’t dealt with the fact. So you have to deal with it. Speaker 1 You know, I think being upfront with your significant other though. Yes. Speaker 2 Well, he lied. I don’t hide it. He did lie and hide it. I’m sure you’re going to have lunch with somebody. He did lie and hide it. And that’s not good either. Speaker 1 See, I think there’s forgiving and then there’s things that are just not negotiable. Speaker 2 Well, and that’s where you set your boundaries. There’s this whole book. Desmond Tutu wrote it with his daughter. And there’s a whole book and there’s like seven steps to forgiveness. And one of them is tell the story, tell people. And then you go through these other steps. And the last step is you make a decision. So either that person is still going to be part of your life or you’re going to let them go, but you’re going to let them go with the forgiveness. So they walk away with the forgiveness. And that’s your decision. And whichever decision you go with, you have to make a decision to stick with it. Speaker 1 They can walk away without the forgiveness, and I can still carry on my life without carrying that back. I know. Speaker 2 I’m going to do something to you, and you’re going to get so mad because you’re still holding on to what that person did. Speaker 1 I would simply say we need somebody to fill in for Gary on the Saturdays. Speaker 2 You will not do that. I will haunt you. Speaker 1 I would just be like, I’ve got other plans. I’ve got to do something else. No. No. Really? I would just walk away and be done. Speaker 2 This is going to be – so now I’m writing this down. This is going to be Gary forgiveness. We’re going to work on this together. Forgiveness. I’m going to purposely do stuff to you so you have to forgive me. See – I’m just kidding. I’m not going to do that. Speaker 1 Oh, boy. That way really quickly. Or am I? Speaker 2 No. So the other thing is you have to time and patience because it takes 21 days to change a habit. Does it really? Yes, 21 days. 21 days. 21 days. And that’s the whole recovery movement too. That’s the whole recovery movement. 21 days. So when you’re clean that 21 days, that’s an accomplishment. Yeah. There’s a Sandra Bullock movie, 21 Days. Speaker 1 Is there a science behind it? There is. There is 21 days. Speaker 2 They say that’s pretty much. There’s research. 21 days to make a habit. And then after that. And it’s true in some way, like with my budget. I’ll tell you. It took me a little bit. Like I was like cheating, you know. But then I’m like, no, I’m going to, you know, you got to stick to it. And now here. Speaker 1 How do you cheat on your numbers and numbers? They don’t lie. Speaker 2 You know, you don’t put it in the budget. Because what I do is I have the budget, like what I’m supposed to spend, and then I’ve got to keep tally, like what I spend on food, what I spend on clothes, whatever I spend. Everything’s gone up too. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. $9 for eggs. I’m not even kidding. $16. $16. I don’t even know what those eggs were. And I’m standing next to this lady and she’s just picking out her eggs. And I’m like, dude, are you not seeing these prices? I ended up getting away with $6. So $6. $6. I remember when eggs were like $1, $3. So who’s paying $17 for eggs? Speaker 1 Please tell me you did not spend $9 on eggs. Speaker 2 $6. $6. That’s a lot because sometimes you got – we’re not big egg people. I was making cookies. This was last month. I was making holiday cookies. They came out so good, by the way. And I’m not a baker. Speaker 1 I know from the ones that you brought in. Speaker 2 Well, I didn’t because one of your goals, remember you said, was watching your weight. So I was thinking of you. Do you forgive me? Speaker 1 For that, I’ll forgive you. Speaker 2 She’ll be here next week. Speaker 1 She’ll be here next week. That’s trivial, though. I’m talking about there are certain things. Yeah, there are certain things. You mentioned the couple that had the affair. I’m sorry. Speaker 2 But you still have to forgive them. You’ve got to read this book, Desmond Tutu. You still have to forgive them. Speaker 1 I remember the bullshit. Speaker 2 In this book, they talk about even forgiving people, horrible stuff. You know, with, what is it, in South Africa, all that stuff that was going on. People were being raped and all that stuff. Apartheid. Apartheid, yeah. They forgave those people. Like the daughter, this is why the daughter wrote the book with him because she forgave stuff that happened. You forgive stuff. You have to forgive. I don’t know how people do that and confront the person who did something horrible to them. Speaker 1 It almost sounds like an A12-step program. Confront the person who did you wrong to forgive them. I don’t want to open that box again and I just assume let it go. But it is so freeing. It’s in the past. It’s so freeing. I actually went through. I’m sorry. I don’t mean to interrupt you. You say it’s so freeing. It is freeing. But I can be freed. But you’re not. If I’ve made a conscious decision to just let it go and move out of my life, I do feel free with it. But you only think you did. Speaker 2 I’m telling you. I know. For someone who knows, though, I’m telling you. For someone who knows. I’m telling you. All right, go ahead. It’ll come out. It’ll come out. You’ll be yelling at someone about the most ridiculous thing, and you won’t know why it’s so fuel. Speaker 1 Well, you can share it with that person, with the person that you say that’s going to come out to. But that doesn’t mean I have to go back into my past. No. No, you can write letters. You can do all sorts of stuff to let that out. I’m not even going to open up that can of worms. Speaker 2 Oh, we’ve got lots of work to do this year. Speaker 1 I’ve got to get our producer, Jimmy J, to quit smoking. That’s going to end. All right, we’re writing it. Yep. Write that down. You did. Gary forgiving. Jimmy J. Look at this. Speaker 2 It’s on the paper. If it’s on the paper. Everything. Speaker 1 I’m forgiving for a lot of things. But come on, admit. There’s a couple of things, folks, that you know. You’d be like, nope. Speaker 2 You’ve got to do it. You’ve got to do it. I’m telling you, it is Frank. I actually went through a 12-step group and I did the 12 steps and I’m telling you, it’s amazing. It was a group that was around my parents and I’m telling you. I didn’t realize how much was coming out in my relationships with people that was because I forgave my parents. Because you know how you do that thing. Oh, they did the best they could. You walk around and you do that and you say it, but do you really mean it? It’s got to come from down here, down here, somewhere. Yeah. Your core. Speaker 1 Your core? Your diaphragm? Your diaphragm. Yeah. Don’t just sing from the voice. It’s going to come from the diaphragm. Speaker 2 All right. Speaker 1 Okay. So. Speaker 2 All right. So our eight simple New Year’s resolutions. All right. So eight simple rules. Keep a positive mindset. Speaker 1 I can do that. Speaker 2 All right. Speaker 1 What’s so funny? I can. I don’t. She’s almost like she doesn’t believe me. Speaker 2 So keep a positive mindset. And that doesn’t mean that you don’t. Like I said, you got to process everything. Like with my budget. If I have a bad month this month, I got to come up with what are the wins for the month. So that’s how you keep a positive mindset. That doesn’t mean you walk around and you just stuff stuff. Speaker 1 Give me one moment, folks. You are listening to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. She is the senior living specialist. I’m Gary Byron. And by the way, you can find them online at averyheights.org. Okay. I’m sorry. Yes. Speaker 2 So a positive mindset is not just a good resolution to make. It’s good because it’s good for your health. It’s good for chronic disease, memory loss. You recover quicker if you have injuries and so forth. And obviously with older adults, as you get older, like even your injuries, now like if I get a back pain, I’m like – my husband, I think I mentioned before, he fell off a roof. And he’s still healing. And that was like – that was two months ago. And it’s going to take him a while. I mean he’s able to function. Speaker 1 But every once in a while, that’s still – Yeah, I’ll bet. Speaker 2 And so if you have a positive mindset, they’re saying research says that you heal faster. I know, right? Speaker 1 I know, just by you saying that. Speaker 2 I know. Speaker 1 I have sciatic issues. Speaker 2 Oh, I had that when I was pregnant. That’s horrible. That’s horrible. Speaker 1 It’s brutal. Speaker 2 Oh, I literally down to the ground. I literally fell down to the ground. And I was on the floor. My husband came home and he was just like, what are you doing? Speaker 1 But you don’t have many more. Speaker 2 Every once in a while. Just during your pregnancy. Every once in a while. Well, he was right. My son was sitting right on something that just It’s nerves. Yeah. It’s what it is. It’s horrible. Yeah. Every once in a while I have it. And it scares me because I’m like, I’m hoping, because that’s tough. yeah acupuncture Speaker 1 that’s a way because I mentioned this on the morning show and that’s what somebody called up one morning and said same thing acupuncture Speaker 2 there’s a great place in Bloomfield I think it’s called I’m doing a plug it’s called Many Rivers and they’re really good well there’s a few places I used to have migraines and they’re really good do you think that really works it did work I had terrible migraines Speaker 1 what about chiropractic yeah I feel the same Speaker 2 I’m not participating in this Speaker 1 no no no I’m right there with you Speaker 2 I love chiropractors Speaker 1 I’m with her alright so go ahead I’m sorry All right. Speaker 2 What number are we on? Number two, commit to 10 minutes of exercise daily. Oh, we can do that. Super simple. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you can even during your breaks, your commercial breaks, you can just do some jumping No, I go for a walk. I go for a walk or light jog or something. Exercise is super important. More than 10 minutes. I’ll go for it. Yes. Exercising daily is important. Obviously, it keeps you from aging. What’s nice about our senior living community, the Heights, is that it’s big and people, oh, it’s so big. That’s great. I always tell people what I’m doing tours, that’s awesome. Speaker 1 Walk the ground. Speaker 2 Because it’s purposeful exercise, which is the best exercise, purposeful exercise. Because you can go and exercise, but when you have to walk to the dining room, walk to the store, walk to an activity, it gets you moving. It’s important. So exercise 10 minutes a day. I have my iWatch, so my iWatch tells me. Speaker 1 It seems achievable. Speaker 2 It’s very achievable. Sure. 10 minutes a day. What else? Better dietary choices. Speaker 1 That’s tough. Speaker 2 That diet, yeah. I know. You just have to make the better choices. It’s hard. Like the other day, I got raspberries. And I tell my daughter, that’s nature’s candy. So you have that. or I can have the candy. That or the candy. Sometimes the candy wins because my husband’s always… Well, there’s sugar and raspberry too. There is. Strawberries and raspberries. But it’s not like the sugar. My husband always buys me gummies in my stocking, which I absolutely love. But I have to make that choice. Every once in a while, I got to go for the raspberries. Speaker 1 I like gummies. Speaker 2 I love gummies. They’re so good. Speaker 1 I know. Speaker 2 I love chocolate mousse. Speaker 1 Oh, that’s rich though. Speaker 2 Creme belay. I know. I only like certain desserts. Like you go to a restaurant, I like certain desserts. But you just have to make better choices. I can’t even hear that. Vegetables every day and vegetables every day. Lots of water. Go for the whole grain. Okay, I can do that. Brown rice. Out of olive oil and avocado instead of cooking oil. Simple little things. And again, just little things. I’m with you. And if it’s not in the house, you’re less likely. Speaker 1 Don’t even tempt yourself at the grocery store. Matter of fact, don’t go to a grocery store hungry. Speaker 2 Remember that old saying? Yes, yes. Yes, grandma. Speaker 1 Why do I put up with this? You know why? Because you forget. Because I’m a forgiving guy. You forgive me. Thank you. Good night, everybody. Good night. Speaker 2 Oh, man. So we talked about quitting smoking. Speaker 1 Oh, it’s see, Jimmy, it’s mind over matter. Speaker 2 But don’t go it alone. So I read and I quit smoking, but I wasn’t like, you know, it’s not fair because I was kind of like a social smoker. So like when I went out partying and stuff like that, and that’s not fair. That’s not really. That’s kind of easier to give up. Although if I go out with my friends and they’re sitting there with a drink. But it’s addicting. It is. It’s the whole thing with the cigarette, the drink. It’s the whole thing. Well, it was fashionable too for a while. It was very fashionable. It was cool. Yeah. So it’s harder, I think, to quit smoking when it’s a part of your life. But don’t go along. Get a professional. Get a doctor. I think hypnotist, different things like that. Speaker 1 Well, they only have like Nicorette gum and patches and things that will help you. Speaker 2 Yeah. But you have to like – it’s small commitments. It’s not the all or nothing thing. No white knuckling as they call it. You know, they all owe nothing. Play and spend time with kids. So your grandkids, your relatives, you know, volunteer somewhere. You know, as an older adult, we try to bring a lot of, like, kids into our community. Like, we’re having the teens come in. You know, try to, like, you know, play. You know, play with kids and have fun. And that’s important. They say research shows that that helps you as well. Helps you to stay young. You know, I love playing with my grandson, you know. And if you don’t have grandkids or anything like that, play with your, you know, your sister’s, you know, grandkids or whatever it is or volunteer at a you know at a daycare or something to that effect where you’re helping out little kids some reason little kids they keep you young and they kind of keep you going all right what have i got uh stimulate your mind oh that’s so important yeah remember we stimulate we did that brain game so you have to you know do crosswords read join a book club um you know call up a friend and just have a topic you know like you know we were debating over forgiveness you know that got my synopsis going i had to think of what is that book who’s their author, you know, just fun stuff like that. Book clubs are so much fun. And we have several of them at the Heights. So if you don’t have someone you can join a book club, you’re always welcome to join one of our book clubs. Speaker 1 You mentioned something about like contacting old friends. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 That in itself could be kind of fun. Speaker 2 Yes. And it’s so important, like, you know, to reach out to your friends and stay connected. Socialization is so important. But reaching out to old friends, yeah. Pure mental health. Yeah. Speaker 1 Making new friends, too. Speaker 2 Yes. Make new friends. I know reaching out to old friends. I know for myself, my old job, I worked there for four years and I have it in my to-do calendar. Like every couple of months, I’ll reach out either via Facebook. I’ll send them an email. I’ll call them up. I’ll check in. And, you know, they don’t check in with me every once in a while as much, but it’s really fun to do. I think it’s super important. You know, all those old stories. You can sit there. We sit here sometimes laughing, even though we didn’t work at the same stations. But we sit here laughing about radio and back in the day and how things were. And it just makes you smile. Speaker 1 What happens, though, if you hit a wall and you fail? Do you just dust yourself, get up, dust yourself off, and get right back up? On that horse or do you just give up? Speaker 2 Right. And there’s no, there’s failure is only for a couple of minutes. You learn from the mistake. So what did I do? Like I told you with my budget, I wasn’t putting everything in. I thought called myself cheating. I was only cheating on myself. Right. So I have to put everything in. So if you fail, you come up with a different plan. Like the gem. The gem is actually going to be one of my goals this year. Yep. All right. So. Very. Come up with a different plan. But this is important. Set your goals. And the last one is? That is the last one. Do your best. Do your best. Oh, yes. Do your best. Sorry, I forgot about that one. Do your best. Can’t forget. Super important. Yeah. And your best is your best. Yep. Speaker 1 You know. Speaker 2 Yep. Try. And your best is your best in that moment, too. Speaker 1 Oh, right. Yes. Well, yeah, for that moment. Speaker 2 For that moment. So your best, don’t look back and go, oh, I messed up three years ago. That was the first and three years ago. Your best is your best in this moment. And you know what you know at this moment. So that is your best. Well stated. I know. I’m like Yoda here. I’m finished, I am. I’ll be Obi-Wan then. I’m finished. Speaker 1 Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition. We’ve got to wrap this up. We can do another half an hour. Your latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Avery Heights. They are a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. And those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, to memory care, and a whole lot more. Charming cottages with a true neighborhood feel. They’re all available to rent adjacent to the main building where those who need more assistance reside. Please visit AveryHeights.org or call them at 860-953-1201. I’ll repeat that for you. Write it down. Give them a call today, 860-953-1201, to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other anywhere in Connecticut. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening to your next chapter. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. 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This episode you will learn when… **Categories:** Healthy Aging & Wellness **Tags:** Healthy Aging, Wellness --- ### [Senior Living Community Moving Day](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/senior-living-community-moving-day/) **Published:** December 15, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Listen to Guest Andrew Jambor of Amston Home Transition Solutions as he shares tips for preparing for a move to a senior living community. Learn more at ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to you, everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights is a 43-acre senior living community with full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living memory care, and a whole lot more. Speaker 1 Now, this show will provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and more. Now, at the end of this program, we’re going to tell you how you can receive a special offer that includes a free lunch. Speaker 1 Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, how are you? I’m great. Speaker 1 I’m great. Speaker 2 Nice to see you. It’s my birthday month. Oh, well, happy birthday. When do we have a date here? August 25th. Speaker 1 Well, it’s coming up. Yeah. August 25th. Yeah. So any special plans? Speaker 2 No, we’re actually going a ferry boat ride in September. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 Yeah, my sister-in-law lives in East Haddam, and so she planned a ferry boat ride for me, my husband, my stepdaughter, and her son, because all of our birthdays are right at the same time. So to save money, we decided to do one thing all together. I am so excited this year. Speaker 1 Not only is that smart, I like experiences. The older I get, I think I have everything I want. And the things that I want or need, I’ll take care of it myself. In experience, however, especially when you can do it with your family, those are things that will stay in your memory forever. Speaker 2 Exactly. It’ll be fun. We’re going to Disney this year anyway in October. Speaker 2 Oh, look at you. We need to save money. Yeah. Speaker 2 What am I doing wrong here? I know. I’ve got to get away. Speaker 2 I’ve been saving money since last year, though. This is a no credit card thing. This is saving money. Speaker 2 That’s good. Yes. Last year. Speaker 2 It’s hard, though. Discipline. Oh, you’re disciplined. Speaker 2 It’s like, I don’t need that shirt. I don’t need that sandwich. No, I’m just not that bad. Speaker 1 It’s not that bad. You might need a sandwich. Last year, I forgot to take a vacation. Speaker 1 And here at the station, we don’t roll them over. You know, we just, you know, we start. If we don’t take them, you don’t. What’s the old saying? Speaker 1 You don’t use it, you lose it. Yeah. So it got to be like right around Thanksgiving and HR comes over to me and says, Gary, you’ve got a couple of weeks here that you just, you never used. Speaker 1 And I’m like, I took a couple of days down. That was, no, you’ve got like two weeks vacation here. So I didn’t go and I wasn’t going anywhere. Speaker 1 So I just, I like took every Monday off and had long weekends and short and short weeks, you know, for, but I, so I told myself I’m going to make sure next year, meaning this year, I’m going to go away. Still almost the end of the summer and I haven’t. Speaker 2 You got time. Well, it’s a hot summer too. So you probably don’t want to go away right now. Speaker 1 I’ll go away around here, though. I don’t want to go somewhere where I can just drive to. Because then I’ll be just like, well, I can go back and go to work. Speaker 1 I can get out of work early and I’ll still have most of the day. That’s not a vacation. I know. Speaker 1 That’s my point. I would have to go somewhere where it’s a long distance. Yes. Speaker 1 The Bahamas. See, now we’re talking. I’ve been there. Speaker 1 Nassau? Nice. It is. Speaker 1 Paradise Island? Oh, the waters. Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 You’ve got to book it. You’re taking me away here. Speaker 2 And you can take your friends. Speaker 1 No, I’m not taking my friends. I’m just taking my friends. That’s it. Speaker 2 No, we’re your friends. Speaker 1 Oh, well, come on along. Come on along. You’ll stay in the other cabana. Speaker 1 We’ll do the show on the road. We’ll do a remote. Want to do that? Speaker 2 They don’t do remotes anymore with radio. Speaker 1 We did. Oh, you did? I broadcast like a couple of weeks ago. Speaker 1 I did two back to back. On a Thursday, I broadcasted live in West Hartford at Ares. You’re going to have to come to Avery Heights. Speaker 1 I’d be happy to do that. And the next day, I was at Dunkin’ Donuts. Oh, my goodness. Speaker 1 It was for about… I did the entire morning show from 6 till 10. Insane. Speaker 1 At both these places. Eris couldn’t have… It was off the hook. Speaker 2 What’s Eris? Speaker 1 It’s in West Hartford Center. They do air purifiers. They do the old Electrolux vacuums. Speaker 1 And then they do… Oh, yes, yes. This thing called Laundry Pro, where you don’t have to use… Speaker 1 Ever use detergent? You don’t have to use… I’ll tell you when we get off the air. Speaker 1 I don’t want that to eat up all your time here. But my point, though, is that a lot of people showed up. Speaker 2 I don’t mean I was just there like once. Speaker 1 I did the whole show, the whole four hours live there. It was. We should definitely get together. Speaker 2 Yeah, we’re going to be unveiling our Veterans Wall in November, November 10th for Veterans Day. So we’ll have to talk. That’d be fun. Speaker 1 Who was your guest this morning? Speaker 2 My wonderful guest is Andrew. He is from Amstin Moving, and I’m sure I’m saying not the full title. Speaker 3 Yes, it’s Amstin Home Transition Solutions. Speaker 2 There we go. And they’re an amazing company. We just started partnering with them to help us with moving folks in. And this is a big thing. It’s a big stressor for folks, and he has made it amazing. Speaker 1 Moving folks into Avery Heights. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 So they don’t have to do it themselves. No. Not at all. Speaker 2 Nope, not at all. Yep. So these guys do everything. Speaker 2 They organize the move. They go to the apartment at Avery Heights and then they go to the person’s house and see what they can bring. They do a layout for them. Speaker 2 They pack it. They unpack it. They do the whole thing and get rid of all the boxes. Speaker 2 And then they do other stuff for them, too. They can clean it out. They can sell the house. Speaker 2 They can clean it. They can do everything. And it just takes that stress. Speaker 2 It just makes moving day nice for the family so they’re not lugging boxes and lugging couches and furniture because it is a downsizing. So there’s always that question mark. What do I bring with me? Speaker 1 Andrew Jambor, owner of Amstead Home Transition Solutions. Andrew, welcome to the show. Thank you. Speaker 1 Of course, of course. Now, tell us a little bit about your company and what you do. I’ve got a few questions, but I first want to hear your backstory. Speaker 3 I’ve done the commercial for it. Pretty much did the whole thing of what we do. So we help seniors and their families primarily with everything from downsizing, moving, packing, repairs in their homes, putting it on the market. Speaker 3 home modifications, anything they need to kind of get their house ready to go and to get them moved. We pack them. We just kind of declutter them. Speaker 3 We help with their items. They have their estate sale items that they have to kind of just basically anything that kind of holds them down through the process. I didn’t know such a company even existed. Speaker 2 Yeah. I haven’t heard of moving companies. And they work with older adults too. Speaker 2 There’s something like I don’t just like to recommend to a mover because a lot of times a mover is just moving too fast. You know, what do you want to move? What do you want to do? Speaker 2 And it’s too much pressure. They need someone like Andrew’s company has a wonderful staff that works with them. Steve is kind of his right-hand man. Speaker 2 And he goes in and he just takes his time. They’re very patient. And that’s what an older adult, an older adult’s family needs. Speaker 2 They don’t need that rushing of let’s move it because this is their home. They’ve been in there 50, 60 years. And they need to know that they’re in good hands, people that care. Speaker 2 And that’s what I like about working for their staff. You’re right. Speaker 1 The more I think about it, as you’re both talking, yeah, a mover, they’re not out. to win any congeniality contest. In fact, they’re usually just leave me alone. Speaker 1 I got a job to do. They’re just moving boxes and beds and furniture. It’s got to be personal. Speaker 1 Yeah, I was going to say with a senior who’s lived in his or her home for 50 years, there’s an attachment that they not only have to their belongings, but I would think even the roof over their head. Speaker 3 It’s got to be emotional, I would imagine. Very emotional process. We find every time we go into somebody the first time, they’re very overwhelmed. They don’t know where to start because they’ll be handed 10 different brochures for, hey, if you need someone to help you with the decluttering side or with selling your things and with moving, you know, here’s the different companies you can call. And it’s just overwhelming. They don’t want to deal with that. Speaker 1 So if you were to take a poll, you would probably discover that the packing and moving to a senior living community can be one of the hardest parts then, right? I mean, so how does your company then make this process easier for them? Speaker 3 So basically, we work one-on-one with our clients, and we make sure that we get to the first time where we always come out initially just to kind of walk through the process and put together a plan for them. And then we go through piece by piece of what they can bring. We know where they’re going. Speaker 3 We know the layout of the rooms. So we know what can fit. So we kind of have an idea going in of what kind of things will fit in those rooms. Speaker 3 We walk through the process. We will label things ahead of time. And then we will set up all the plan of if there’s things that have to be decluttered or moved out over time or disposed of if they haven’t been used in years. Speaker 3 We set up stages where we come in and just kind of start with packing and just start kind of getting the things ready. move them and then we’ll come in and do the other stuff afterwards we do house cleaning and things afterwards just to make sure the house is ready to go for for sale if they’re going to sell Speaker 1 this may seem like a silly question but do people generally want their new room to look like their old room like i want this to be right where see you see my living room that’s exactly how i want my living you see this picture that i have above my bed i want it right he signs like a client right Speaker 3 Yeah, that’s exactly what it is. They’re so used to having it in a certain style that you have to take pictures of the space before you move anything, especially like the little things on the keepsakes that they have on bookshelves and things like that. You want to make sure that if they have a display case, everything. Speaker 1 You’re not just moving furniture in boxes. I mean you’re placing it in the boxes, labeling it, and then when you arrive at Avery Hill, You’re taking it out, and then you’re redesigning. You’re not just movers. Wow. Speaker 2 Yeah. It helps with the comfort and the stress, especially if someone has Alzheimer’s or dementia. It’s so important that they have that because that familiarity, that comfort. Wow, that’s incredible. Yeah. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. You’re so much more than moving. Speaker 2 It’s definitely a specialty. Definitely. Speaker 1 What does right sizing mean? And how can you use this process when, let’s say, when moving into a senior living community? Speaker 3 Yeah. So right-sizing is basically getting their things to make sure they’re going to bring the right amount of stuff with them and make sure it fits in their new space. That’s the biggest part because a lot of times we find that people bring a lot more than they want. Speaker 3 They want to bring a lot more things with them than are really logistically going to fit in a space. So we’re trying to make sure that they part with the things they don’t need anymore and in the best way possible, whether it’s selling it, whether it’s doing something with it, or if they want to keep things, finding a storage for it somewhere. We can store it for them at that point. Speaker 3 And then just kind of saying, okay, the rest of these, this is what’s going to fit. And that’s just making sure you’re kind of decluttering the rest of these things. And we find that the things that sit in storage for a while, we will follow up with them and say, you really probably don’t need this if you haven’t touched it in a while. Speaker 3 So we’ve worked with situations where even if it’s an internal move where they’re moving to a smaller space within the facility or community, we find that they will go through. I walked with a client yesterday through stuff that she hasn’t touched since she’s been in the community for 12 years. And she’ll say, yeah, I don’t need this anymore. Speaker 3 I haven’t used it. Let’s kind of keep processing it. Speaker 1 Interesting that you bring that up. So you’re like decluttering things as well. Same idea. Speaker 1 Yeah, because, I mean, if someone’s got – I don’t know. I’m just going to make up something random here. If they’ve got a 1,900 square foot house and they’re not moving into anything anywhere near 1,900 square feet and they don’t need 1,900 square feet. Speaker 1 Right. There’s obviously things that they’re not going to be able to bring with them. Do you help them rationalize that where, yeah, this is really nice. Speaker 1 You might want to let someone hold on to this for you. Yes. Or you might want to just, no, I don’t really think you need this. Speaker 1 You could probably discard this. Speaker 3 Yeah, we kind of help them walk to that conclusion sometimes when it comes to things that they haven’t touched in a while. Like if they’re going into a situation where it’s a smaller kitchen or no kitchen, you know, they may have a kitchenette. And they have all the – that’s the biggest – you know, one of the biggest things in their home is like all the kitchen things they’ve collected over the years. Speaker 3 Your pots, your pans, your different cookware, utensils, things that they don’t need to bring as much with them. of cups, glasses, all kinds of things that we can kind of start sorting through plastic that they would never use containers and things like that, where you’re never going to go through those things again. We’ll kind of go through those items and say, when’s the last time you used this? Speaker 3 If it’s been on a top shelf above the refrigerator that they don’t ever touch or underneath something they can’t no longer get down to reach under the stove and they haven’t, you know, they’ll come out and say, well, I might want to bake again someday and do that. But we kind of rationalize with them. Speaker 1 So give us some tips on preparing to move that you can do months, maybe a year or even months before the actual move takes place to a senior living community. Speaker 3 Yeah, so we always recommend that people start as early as possible, whether it’s a year, whether it’s two years. We give presentations on these kind of things to senior centers and assist living communities. And our advice is always, you know, start today because you don’t know if all of a sudden you’re going to need that help. Speaker 3 You know, in six months you might be planning to move in a year and something comes up and you have to move sooner. So we’ll always say start going room by room in your home, especially the areas that need the most love, like the basements, the attic spaces, the garage sheds, things that have accumulated things that they no longer may even know was there. Closets full of clothes that they haven’t worn in a long time. Speaker 3 Start going by item and start to, you know, through those rooms, one room at a time, little wins, you know, little victories for them to go through each time so they can work on it for an hour here and there. And just kind of start to pile out these things into piles of I’m going to donate this. I’m going to I don’t need this anymore. Speaker 3 I can I can kind of walk through what I want to keep. And then just through that process, just do it room by room. And if there’s things they can part with, you start kind of doing things one thing at a time, one bag at a time, going to a donation center or giving it to a community that needs it, repurposing things. Speaker 3 There’s different things you could do with those items depending on the level of sentimental value they have or the level of just functionality value. You might be able to sell it. You might be able to do things with that. Speaker 3 And if it’s things like if their kids haven’t collected items that you’ve kept in their rooms forever, they can start coming to get those items because you tell them, hey, I’m going to be in a year. We’re planning on moving finally. You need to come and start taking these things out. Speaker 1 It’s kind of what you just said kind of leads into my next question. What can family members, how proactive can they be? What can they do? If you were to tell somebody, hey, if you really want to help, let’s say someone who’s going to be moving into senior living and their son or daughter or both came to you and said, what can I do? What is it that they would really be a big help? Speaker 3 Yeah, start going through the stuff that maybe their personal items in the home, right? If it’s anything that belongs to them, if there’s things that they want, start working through the family to decide with mom and dad to say, hey, you know, you’re not going to be able to, you know, these aren’t going to fit. This is what you’re going to be likely going into. Speaker 3 What do you want to do with these items? Start working with their parents. Like I was saying, go through and go and collect in their items. Speaker 3 Hey, this might have value. I’d want that. Or I think I know my aunt would want. Speaker 3 Somebody in my family may want that. Let’s start to maybe do a tag sale. maybe start doing some things we can start coordinating as a family earlier in the process. Speaker 1 Have you ever had a client who, I don’t want to say stubborn, I think we can, no, because we can all be like this. Yeah, of course. That said to you, I can’t part with this. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. This has got to come with me. Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 You know, and you might say, well, there’s not, I don’t know if there’s room for this, you know, or how do you help someone? I don’t even know if this falls under your purview or not, but how do you help someone part with something that may at one time, even if it’s not in present day, but at one time was near and dear to them? Speaker 3 Yeah, and every situation is different with that. There’s certain items they may have high sentimental value. In some cases, we’ll encourage them to find other ways to, if they don’t want to part with something, maybe, hey, take a picture of this item. Speaker 3 Keep it around for memory’s sake. What does the item mean to you? Why would you want to hang on to it? Speaker 3 And sometimes they come to the – after a while of going back and forth, they come to the realization like, yeah, I’d like it to go somewhere. This was built by my great-aunt or my great-uncle built this from hand. I want to keep it, but I know it’s not going to fit. Speaker 3 And you kind of can walk them to that solution where they say, what can we do with it? Can we donate it to somewhere? Yeah, we can start coming up with solutions. Speaker 3 Maybe someone else would have this – maybe someone in your family would want to hang on to it just to keep it. Those are the kind of things where – and then sometimes if it gets to the point where they’re like, well, I really want to take it. it uh then we get to the point where okay we’re gonna bring it like one client wanted to keep her piano that her husband had given to her and even though she hadn’t played it in a long time and it wasn’t gonna fit in the new space she really wanted it so we had to work with her to get it moved and then she could see that it wasn’t going to fit once she got there sometimes it’s that realization when they get there they realize like you sometimes you have to bring it along to show them that you know it’s not gonna work and they can then they realize it you don’t mind doing that even Speaker 1 though you know it’s just a waste of yeah we try to help them as much as possible but sometimes Speaker 3 you’re just like hey we’ll do it but it’s you know it’s the time is going to take a little longer to do this so we’re going to you know you’ll see it and we’ll have to take it out after something you Speaker 1 know people are people so i hate to i don’t know separate or segregate or whatever the word is but are older are older adults just don’t do the voice okay no i’m like that because i see older adults but somebody could be older than me. I don’t mean, I mean, our older, older adults, our most senior adults, are they more challenging than somebody who’s just on the lower end? Speaker 2 Like going through the depression and so forth, Speaker 1 I’m sure. I mean, somebody, let’s say somebody who’s 70 and somebody who’s 90, is there a difference in working with each? It’s a 20 years, you know, gap, but it’s not just a 20 year gap like 30 to 50. Speaker 3 It’s a different 20 year gap. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Where – Speaker 3 Yeah. I think those levels, they were more based on having those possessions. They didn’t have a lot when they were kids going through different times. So a lot of the things that they’ve gotten accustomed to or to hang on to, yeah, they have a harder time parting with certain things. Speaker 2 Yeah, I thought so. Speaker 3 But the relationship with the kids is the biggest thing because we find that they won’t listen to their kids about parting with stuff, right? So having a third party come in to say, you know, to kind of talk to them off to the side when their kid’s not there, we find that that’s been a good situation for us where someone, the kid will walk away exhausted, the son, and we’ll talk to them and kind of create some light of the situation. Next thing you know, the client’s going through their stuff, starting to declutter it, which they’re like, how do you do that? Speaker 3 It’s just because they’re having that extra, you know, because they won’t listen. I don’t know. I have parents the same way. Speaker 3 They won’t listen to me if I ask them to get rid of something. That’s just the nature. They don’t want to hear it from you. Speaker 1 Even small children. Speaker 2 Yeah, I think people like to keep broken things, too. You ever do that? Like, I don’t know, back in the day, the stereo would break, and for some reason, we’d put it in a box and put it in the basement. Yeah, we’ll fix it. I don’t know why. Speaker 1 You look no further than our own kitchenette here at the radio station. There’s an old, like, Keurig or coffee maker, and it’s broken. It even says, do not use. Speaker 1 It’s broken. But it’s there. It’s like, well, what are we doing with it? Speaker 2 Andrew, how do we part with those things? How do we let go of our broken items? Speaker 3 That’s when you have someone just come in when you’re not looking. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 3 It just happens to disappear. Speaker 2 What’s that called? Speaker 1 You know? No, that’s, you’re right. That is what you do. Speaker 1 Yeah. You’re right. They’re not there. Speaker 1 Out of sight, out of mind. Hey, folks, you are listening to your next chapter with Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Our guest this morning, Andrew Jambor. He’s the owner of Amstead Home Transition Solutions. Lots of people don’t just want to throw stuff out, but maybe do something meaningful with it. Speaker 1 What can you do with your stuff that, let’s say, you don’t want? I know you said you could donate it. Look, value is subjective, right? Speaker 1 Because what’s valuable to me and what’s valuable to you not only are two different things, But it may not in the real world, it may not have zero value. You know, this doesn’t mean anything to anybody. You could put this on eBay and we could see each other one year from today and they’ll still be sitting there or Amazon or whatnot. Speaker 1 Yeah. How do you how do you work with that? Speaker 3 Yeah. So we walk through and when we’re going through someone the first time a house that we assess their stuff and they have things they’ll say, oh, yeah, this is, you know, I’d like to sell this item or this may have some value to it. It could be furniture. Speaker 3 It could be China. It could be sterling silver. It could be any of those things. Speaker 3 And then sometimes you come across some unique things. So we’ll take pictures of things for our clients and customers and say, hey, you know, we’ll at least hand it over to an estate person to see what they feel if there’s value here to kind of have a professional opinion come in that’s above our own, above our pay grade to say, yeah, there’s value. Let’s do something about it or no, or this is roughly going to be maybe you’ll get 25 bucks out of it. Speaker 3 It’s not worth the time. Just to kind of have that other opinion come in to kind of have that third party say, yeah, this is what it’s worth. We’ve done auctions for years and years. Speaker 3 This is how we operate. So if they feel like they still want to get something out of it, we’ll say, well, you can still try to put it on somewhere like a Facebook marketplace or we could put it on there for you type thing. And you’ll kind of see, like you said, like the Ebays or whatever to kind of see if it’s going to have any value at all. Speaker 3 And then you’ll be able to realize maybe someone will get more value out of it from donating it to someone that can use it. There’s a lot of good agencies out there throughout Connecticut that can take those veterans to help veterans, help homeless people. So there’s other purposes you can use for stuff than just kind of donating it to a goodwill. Speaker 3 There’s other places. And they get the tax break on top of that for doing it. So there’s some benefits to that. Speaker 1 I would imagine a lot of people don’t like to throw things away. I know pack rats of all ages. Speaker 2 Because you never know. You might need that, right? You never know. I might need that. Speaker 3 You know, the bringing in that dumpster, though, you’d be surprised. And they’re like, oh, don’t do that. But the moment it shows up, they start loading things into it. What about hoarders? And that’s another one, yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I did. I know a little bit about hoarding. It’s a mental illness. Yeah. Speaker 3 And that’s a hard thing to part. You can walk through a home of things that have been, you know, even the home itself is in rough shape when you get into it because of that situation. And it’s a hard situation for them to part with. Speaker 3 And sometimes you have to just, you know, you have to kind of work them through it. You take your time with them and you kind of have to help them come to acceptance that things in here are unhealthy for you because of some stuff you’ve held on to is just not in good shape anymore. It’s not worth what it used to be. Speaker 3 We need to start to kind of get those things out. Speaker 1 What would you say are some really good like moving day tips that you could offer people? Speaker 3 Yeah. So for what we tell our clients on moving day is just go out, have breakfast, enjoy yourself. By the time you come back, everything will be done. Speaker 3 It’s just time to stay away from it. You don’t want them there. It’s better that sometimes they get in the way of everybody moving and trying to get through. Speaker 3 Slow you down. Speaker 1 Oh, where are you putting that? Speaker 3 Yeah. Be careful when you put that in a bottle. Speaker 1 Oh, you’re doing it wrong. Speaker 3 Right. Speaker 1 You’ve got to cushion it. Speaker 3 We always encourage people to go have a breakfast, take your parents out, do something. God, who is this guy? Speaker 2 Where did they find you? I told you there was a voice. Yeah. Speaker 2 Where did they find you? Exactly. Exactly. Speaker 2 So, you know, it’s like – Right. Where’s your boss? Speaker 3 Make sure you take your medication. Make sure you take your jewelry, things that are, you know, your personal items that are close to you, things that you can take with you on the way out. Make sure you’re bringing that with you. Speaker 3 Keep it in your possession. And then, you know, we’ll handle the rest of it where it’s like – and just stay calm through the process. That’s the biggest thing on Moving Day. Speaker 1 It’s emotional though. It’s a hard thing. We said that at the top of the show. Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah, I can imagine just because, and not even so much for their belongings. They’re going to see their belongings. Speaker 1 They’re going to put them in the right place. But just sometimes the home, the dwelling itself, you know, with the memories there. And I would imagine, you know, watching your kids and your grandkids just grow up, you know, little marks, the lines on the walls from when the kids were a certain height. Speaker 1 And you just watch. And it’s got, I don’t know. Speaker 2 It’s a long time. Sometimes it’s 60, 70 years. That’s a long time to be in a home. Speaker 3 And if you talk to realtors, that’s what you find, too, when they’re going through the home. They don’t want people there when they’re trying to have people walk through. And a lot of times the senior clients will want to stay there and talk about the house, right? They’ll talk about the house and say, this is what it was. This is where I marked my kid’s stuff. Speaker 1 I’ve only got about a minute or so left. Siobhan, there’s a relationship, obviously, between Avery Heights and Amston, a home transition. Talk about that partnership and about that opportunity that you have. Speaker 2 So just to take the stress to kind of encourage our folks to use them, we actually give them a gift certificate for $1,000. And they use that towards the services. And it’s important because, like I said, that stress of trying to figure all that out, obviously they do it all, like you’re talking about. Speaker 2 So we do that for all of that. Obviously, he does the moves and all the organizing and all that. And the packing. Speaker 2 And the packing. Oh, my goodness. I hate packing. Speaker 2 Who likes it? But they also are going to be doing presentations for us as well. And so on downsizing, on selling your home, on moving day, to build that relationship with the community. Speaker 2 So we’ll be bringing people from the outside community to meet with them. And it’s important. Like older adults and anyone really like that respect and to build that relationship. Speaker 2 Because that gets you halfway there, makes you feel more comfortable on moving day. Speaker 1 You’re so right. This isn’t about anybody can get some friends together and move some boxes and some furniture. It doesn’t work though. Speaker 1 No, obviously not. So in other words, folks, don’t get a few friends together, your muscular buddies, and I can lift this bed. I got a truck. Speaker 1 No, no, no. This is emotional. I’ve seen that. When we start talking seniors, these are lifelong items. Speaker 1 And you’ve got a very delicate way of handling this. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. For more information on today’s topic, Senior Living Community Moving Day, and our special guest, Amstead Home Transition Solutions, whom I’d really like to thank our special guest this morning, Andrew Jambor. Speaker 1 Just call this number, 866-537-1444. And the first three callers will get a special lunch and tour at Avery Heights. Very generous. Speaker 1 I’ve got to take advantage of this myself, I think. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Someday. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Assisted Living, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ### [Quick and Easy Tips to Staying Healthy](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/quick-and-easy-tips-to-staying-healthy/) **Published:** April 7, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** It’s time for a check in on your Healthy Resolutions. In this episode we give more healthy tips to keep you moving and grooving through the year. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good morning and welcome to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots ever in Connecticut. It is time to celebrate our seniors and give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, with inner peace, and the courage to never give up on growing. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, she is the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Speaker 1 I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, good to see you. Good morning. Speaker 1 Good to see you. Happy Easter. Yes. Speaker 1 Actually, I’m sorry, we just had Easter. Happy Tax Day. Speaker 2 Oh, gosh. Speaker 1 No. I know. Although it’s a weekend this year, so I think people get an extra day. Yes. Doesn’t that usually happen? Speaker 2 Probably Monday. Yeah, Monday. Speaker 1 Yeah, Monday or Tuesday. Speaker 2 Yeah. So you look great. Thank you. What have you been up to? Just living, planning, planning our little financial, what is it, four, four shows, four Speaker 1 parts series. Oh, that’s coming up next month, right? Speaker 2 That’s coming up next month, yes. Our first show will air on the 22nd. Speaker 1 Very nice. Of May? Oh, no, of April. Speaker 1 Of April, yeah. Do you like the change of season? Do you like the warmer temperatures in the spring? Speaker 1 I do. It’s finally in the air. I do. Speaker 2 I love the spring, yeah. Hopefully we’ll finally be able to open our patio. We need like steady warm, you know, this weird kind of cold, hot. Yeah. Speaker 1 Change the air inside, open up the windows. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 You know, out with the old. That’s what I love. Speaker 2 That’s my favorite part, actually, letting the air and opening the windows. Speaker 1 How could you not? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Do you get involved? Are you more of a homebody or do you like to traverse the state and get out and about? Speaker 2 I like to walk. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 I like to walk fast. Speaker 1 Like hike or just go for a walk in the neighborhood? Speaker 2 Both. Both. I love to go to the reservoir. Speaker 2 I love to go to like Taki Mountain. And I do love to walk in the neighborhood. I like to walk far. Speaker 2 I was walking like four or five miles. I could just keep walking. I love to walk. Speaker 2 Yeah. And it’s really good for you too. Speaker 1 Oh, sure. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I’d rather. See, I remember a buddy of mine had a membership at a gym. And in the wintertime, I would go with him because he could take a friend. Speaker 1 He had a kind of member. He bought the platinum package or something like that. And he would always say, well, you’re my motivation because I know that you’ll go. Speaker 1 And he says, you know, sometimes it’s good to go with a buddy. He says, if you like. It is. Speaker 1 If you said no, I’d probably come up with an excuse to not go because I know you’re counting on it. You’re looking forward to it. You’re going to meet me there. Speaker 1 I have to go. Well, that’s great. He says, but because I told him, I go, well, you really, I’d rather walk outdoors, take in nature, just breathe fresh air than being on a treadmill in some stuffy room Speaker 2 I love walking outside it’s so pretty I always go with friends but it’s really fun because you just lose it’s three and a half miles but you don’t even realize you did it until the next day then you’re feeling it but you don’t realize you did it because you’re just talking and hanging out with friends Speaker 1 it’ll become a day in fact you deal with this with your residents when you’re not as able to endure the physicality of a hike or even a long walk. I mean, you always see people of all ages, elderly. But you’d be amazed, though. Speaker 2 We have a new resident, 103 1⁄2. He will actually, next month in May, he’ll be 104. And this guy, he’s got a walker, but he’s upright and chatting. Speaker 2 He just did a presentation at a local library. Really? Yeah, this guy, he’s got all his own teeth, which are just so cool. Speaker 2 I know, I’m so weird. He’s talking to me. I’m on the tour. Speaker 2 This is how ridiculous I am. And I’m staring at him. I’m like, are those your own teeth? Speaker 2 And he’s just like, yes. But they’re just so cute. They’re just his teeth. Speaker 2 You know, the things we take for granted. You don’t see that a lot. Yeah. Speaker 2 And they’re nice teeth, too. They’re not just his teeth, but they’re all just like our regular rows. But they’re so little. Speaker 2 They’re just almost like his baby teeth. Speaker 1 well but you know what they say as you age you shrink i mean i don’t know if you do your bone Speaker 2 your teeth shrink too i don’t know i don’t know but he’s very any any uh it’s neat he told me good Speaker 1 clean living that’s what’s kept so what see interesting that you say that i don’t know what that means because i once asked a woman who was over a hundred and she was talking she was a wine drinker uh she’d have a shot every now and then and i was like looking at her like are you kidding me. So I actually finally precipitated me to approach her. And I finally because I didn’t know her all that well. Speaker 1 And I said, so, you know, I congratulate you on reaching such a milestone. And she goes, oh, I’m in my hundreds. And I said, well, what’s your secret then to longevity in life? Speaker 1 And of course, she told me a couple of things that I was kind of expecting. Just don’t let things get to you and exercise and eat healthy and sure, the same stuff. But then Whenever I heard, I have a glass of wine every day. Speaker 1 Yes. And, you know, I’ll have a shot every now and then and a beer every now and then. I’m like, okay. Speaker 1 You know. Speaker 2 But it’s moderation. Speaker 1 Well, everything is in moderation. Speaker 2 But that’s the thing, though, with, you know, people in general. We don’t know how to, like, boundaries and have moderation. So even, like, that shot of red wine every day, that’s really good for you. Speaker 2 That’s part of the Blue Zones, the nine places throughout the world where people are healthy. That’s one of the things they do. They have a shot glass of red wine. Speaker 2 Many of the people do to stay healthy. Every day. Every day. Speaker 2 But that’s healthy. But then when people hear, oh, glass of red wine every day and these big goblets, it’s like, no, it’s just a shot. Speaker 1 I don’t know if it was a shot. I think it was a wine, but it was one glass. It was a glass. Speaker 2 It was a box. Speaker 1 Yeah, right. A box of wine. I have a box of wine over here. Speaker 1 I don’t even know what kind of wine. We never got to that point, but she said a glass of wine. Did she say with dinner? Speaker 1 She may have. Speaker 2 That’s nice, too. And if she’s out and about and she’s talking to you, they say intergenerational communication is important as well because it keeps you young. It keeps you not in your zone of just talking to people the same age all the time. Speaker 1 I so believe that. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 There’s a psychological aspect to all this where if you get somebody that’s just lonely, that could lead to depression, and you have very minimal interaction, as opposed to a person who, I’m not saying every day you’ve got to be out and about, but three, four days a week, and you’re out and you’re socializing and you’re active. Right, exactly. Purpose. Good word. I think they do live longer. Speaker 2 They do, yeah. And this gentleman, I mean, someone wrote a book about him. He was, like I said, he was just at one of the local libraries doing a presentation. Speaker 2 You know, he’s just, whenever you sit with him, I mean, he’s fascinating. You know, I was, I didn’t want him to leave. Like the lady who brought him, she was like, we have to go. Speaker 2 And I was just, I was fascinated. He was just talking about his life and the war and, you know, and he was just pleasant. He’s just super pleasant. Speaker 2 I mean, before he came to the community, we kind of, he came to one of our events. And, you know, we always want to introduce people to residents. And so we brought one woman over and we said, oh, we want you to meet this gentleman. Speaker 2 And she pulled over. And literally, it was like he was at a wedding. There was a line of people coming over to meet him and holding his hand and talking to him. Speaker 2 And, you know, he’s super popular. Speaker 1 Do you ever ask these people, it doesn’t have to be in their hundreds, even in their late 80s and on, you know, or mid 80s onward or forward. Just talk to them and have them compare life and what it was like all those years ago when they were growing up, you know, compared to what it is now. Because, you know, you talk to kids and I don’t want to belittle this, but, you know, talk to talk to kids and they’ll tell you, oh, we got it tough. We got it tough. And I’m like, you got it tough. Speaker 2 You know, my daughter will tell you that you talk. Speaker 1 Then you talk to this guy, you know, who was a child during the Depression. Yeah. And they didn’t know whether, you know, somebody had to beg for a loaf of bread. And that’s tough. Yeah. Speaker 2 Well, look at Johnny Cash’s life. You know, the movie with. I remember. I haven’t seen that. Speaker 1 Yeah, it was a good movie. Speaker 2 Walk the line. That was a great movie. But remember what happened to his brother with the saw? Speaker 2 And, you know, he was sawing that wood and it cut him like right, almost like right down his stomach. And then his dad, you know, didn’t, you know, was yelling at him. And I mean, it’s horrible the way. Speaker 2 I mean, he was, you know, they had the radio. So obviously they had electricity. But what did they get? Speaker 2 One pair of shoes. And the Loretta Lynn story. I’m just saying like people. Speaker 2 Oh, right. Call Miner’s daughter. You look at her. Speaker 2 Look at her. I mean, that was kind of that back in the day to, you know, to me. That’s the way they lived. Speaker 1 Amazing. And the sad thing is that the, going back to the kids, the kids, they think they got it so rough. Oh, yeah. And it’s like, well. Speaker 2 My daughter is like, super smart. Well, because they got nothing compared to. Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 You know. Speaker 2 We were just talking about my grandson, who’s amazing. He’s almost like one and a half now. And so he’s coming into his little personality and he’s hysterical. Speaker 2 But it’s like, I mean, he’s got everything. He’s got a coat for every occasion. He’s got the cutest clothes. Speaker 2 I mean, he’s got all these sneakers. And I want him to be spoiled. Just let me just say that. Speaker 2 But it’s so interesting, the difference. You know, my childhood, I had, you know, for school clothes, we got two things. You know, you get and, you know, that one outfit that you would wear. Speaker 2 You get a new pair of shoes and one outfit. And maybe an outfit because if you had good pants, maybe you got a shirt or maybe you got a dress. And I was, you know, I was extremely excited about that one thing. Speaker 2 Whereas, you know, my daughter’s school clothes, that’s it’s an occasion. You know what I mean? You know, so. Speaker 2 Right. It’s. Speaker 1 You know, we’re talking about staying healthy mentally, physically to maintain both. Yeah. You know, stimulation and having purpose, you know, and just. Remaining active, you know. it kind of leads into the theme of today’s show about staying which is one of my favorite actually Speaker 2 it’s staying healthy yes yeah earlier this year like we were talking about before we kind of did that healthy resolution right and so now we’re done with quarter one right so where are we at right oh true yes quarter two now we’ve got new tips and new new things that you can do to stay healthy i think it’s so important i think what happens is we get to a certain point with our health and, you know, where we just stop caring. We just stop, you know, people let themselves go, so to speak, quote unquote, and we stop paying attention to our weight. We start paying, you know, stop going to the doctor, you know, and sometimes people are early in their 60s, sometimes in their 70s. There’s this what’s the point kind of mentality. But, you know, you could be here till you’re 100. Now you can be here miserable till you’re 100 because you didn’t take care of your health. Or like this guy, you can be kind of just still living life at 104 And, you know, I mean, if you look online, I mean, there are people that are still skiing, still have second careers and all sorts of stuff. Speaker 2 And they’re in their hundreds or their 80s or 90s. So, you know, I think we forget that life is a journey and it’s it’s the whole thing from beginning to end. It’s not we don’t decide when we’re done, you know, and if we’re still here topside, there’s you know, we need to take care of ourselves so that we can have a healthy, happy. Speaker 1 It was George H.W. Bush was jumping out of a plane at 90 years old. Speaker 2 Yeah, that’s what I’m saying. Speaker 1 90th birthday, jumping out of a plane. Speaker 2 And people think that’s unusual. That’s an exception. But it’s not if you take care of yourself. Speaker 2 If you, you know, diabetes is, that’s one of the, you know, undetected, you know, biggest, to me, what I see people get, the whole silent killer thing. Because you have that, you’re not doing, following the rules of that, you know. And it’s hard. Speaker 2 My dad had it. And I can’t imagine not being able to eat sugars and carbohydrates and all this stuff and having to watch every little thing you eat. But if you don’t, when you get older, I mean, I saw my dad just suffer, you know, between his kidneys and his heart. Speaker 2 And it wasn’t the diabetes. It was everything that fell apart because of the diabetes, you know. Speaker 1 Are there – give us some tips. I mean, what can we do to stay healthy? Speaker 2 Yeah, I think one of the most important things that you can do is your wellness visits. Hopefully we all have health insurance, right? So those recommended treatments, the wellness, the yearly physical, it’s no copay. Speaker 2 All you got to do is just go do it. And a lot of people don’t do that. We had a woman that’s new that’s going to be coming to the community, hasn’t been to the doctor in two years. Speaker 2 I’m like, what’s going on? And granted, she’s in her 80s. I get it. What’s the point? Speaker 2 Why am I going? Because you could be here until you’re 100. And like I said, it could be miserable or it could be good. Speaker 2 And so those wellness visits are so, so important. Maybe they don’t want to know. But if you know, maybe you can fix it. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Detection, right? Speaker 1 Do you ever hear about those stories? It’s all psychosomatic. It’s like, you know, the person was doing great up until they found out that this and they started taking treatment for that. Speaker 1 And then there was residual effects to that. And they just kept on going, skating along, not knowing what they don’t know. You know, they, you know. Speaker 2 But at the same time, people like, you know, especially with COVID, that’s where people got, especially older adults, got out of the groove of going to the doctor. Because obviously there’s that fear, you know, that I’m going to get COVID. Or, you know, people don’t want to go. Speaker 2 People really have that fear that they go to the doctor’s office or, you know, they don’t want to leave the house. So I think a lot of older adults, unfortunately, stopped going to the doctor. And that’s why this woman probably hasn’t been in two years because we have the telehealth and all that stuff. Speaker 2 But it’s important to go see your doctor. I mean, I’ve had, you know, I have the hospice background. I mean, we had people that undetected had cancer, undetected. Speaker 2 And I told you that sad story about that gentleman with his wife. I mean, she fell on the ice. They thought it was just from the bruising or whatever, the fall, and come to find out she had cancer. Speaker 2 And literally she died in two weeks. And he was blindsided because, but she hadn’t gone to the doctor. And so there was no early detection, no, who knows, who knows? Speaker 2 We don’t know what would have happened. But that’s so sad. It’s one thing to know someone’s dying. Speaker 2 That’s still very challenging. But to have the love of your life. I mean the guy was on the phone. Speaker 2 He was bawling. It was horrible. It was heartbreaking. Speaker 2 And there’s nothing you can do. Just be there for the person. Speaker 1 It’s tough. What about exercise? Speaker 2 Exercise. We always talk about that. Exercise is important. 30 minutes a day. I know for myself. Speaker 1 It’s pretty easy. Speaker 2 It is. It is and it isn’t. Speaker 1 I mean, you know, what does it entail? Speaker 2 Well, it depends. It could just be going for a walk. Oh, you know, it could be, you know, for myself, I have I try to do kind of, you know, regular, you know, push ups and sit ups and those types of like one, you know, two or three times a week. Speaker 2 And then I try to do cardio a couple of times a week. You know, I was trying to get to the gym. It just, you know, between my daughter and life, it just wasn’t happening. Speaker 2 So now I work out at home, you know, and I’m able to, you know, you want to get yourself prepared, put the mat down, get in your workout clothes, whatever you need to do. Because Ann, Mel Robbins always says it’s that five seconds. I don’t know if you’ve heard of her. Speaker 2 She’s a motivational, kind of like an Anthony Robbins. Actually, ironically, her name is Mel Robbins. And she talks about that five-second rule. Speaker 2 So it’s not the five-second rule where you drop stuff on the floor. Speaker 1 That’s what I thought, yeah. Speaker 2 It’s the five-second rule where in five seconds, if you don’t do what you are supposed to be doing or what you want to do in that five seconds, you’re not going to do it. So if you’re sitting there and you’re like – the other day I was sitting and I wanted to do my cardio Saturday. And I was on the phone with a friend of mine. Speaker 2 And I was just like, I don’t feel like doing anything. But I’m like, you know what? I can do this phone call and do my walk at the same time. Speaker 2 I got myself up. But it’s like if I had waited that five seconds more, it’s like getting up in the morning. If you lay there more than that, if you hit that snooze and you lay there more than that five seconds, her thing is you’ve got to get up. Speaker 2 She calls it ready, set, go. Ready, set, go. And you get up. Speaker 1 You know what? There’s validity in that. It works. Speaker 1 I’m thinking about it right now. I’m like, there have been times I’ve had lazy moments. Yep. Speaker 1 And then like a flash of inspiration where I’ve got, oh, I got to do this. And then I’m like, okay, that’s gone. Yep. Speaker 1 Five seconds. Then again, this episode of Seinfeld. I haven’t seen this one in a while. Speaker 2 But you can take that with you too on your walk. Put your, you know, your Bluetooth in. Speaker 1 Oh, I wouldn’t even do that. Are you kidding me? I want to take it all in. Speaker 2 Yeah. Well, you can watch it while you walk. You got to be careful. Speaker 1 But some people will give you a legitimate excuse, particularly the elder. Speaker 2 Yes. I’ve got aches and pains. Speaker 1 And I, you know, the osteoporosis, I’ve got arthritis. I’ve got the… Speaker 2 And that’s where you go see either, you know, a specialist, you know, kind of a personal trainer who specializes for older adults. And some of the gyms have that. I know the senior centers have those. Speaker 2 We have one. Mark can always give us a call and I can kind of connect you and he can kind of maybe help you. But also physical therapy. Speaker 2 Talk to a physical therapist. You can talk to your doctor and say, listen, I want to exercise. Can you give me a prescription for physical therapists for consultation or what have you? Speaker 2 And a physical therapist can kind of tell you what you can and can’t do based on what’s ailing you. Does diet have anything to do with this? Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 Diets, yeah. Speaker 1 I mean, other than the obvious, yeah, I don’t eat a lot of sugar, kid. Speaker 2 You know, I don’t eat a lot of sweets. Speaker 1 But, I mean. Well, your cholesterol. Speaker 2 Right. It’s, you know, your sugars. You know, you got to stay away from. Speaker 2 Sugar’s a huge one, obviously. Fatty foods. And as I sit here, I’m just such, I love French fries. Speaker 2 But I got to. Speaker 1 Me with pizza. Speaker 2 Last week, actually, I was so bad. We ate out like almost every day. And I was like, I can’t this week. Speaker 2 So this week I went to the five second rule. I was so tired last night, but I went to the grocery store and I’m setting myself up for the, for the rest of the, you know, the week coming up. It’s important. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Some people though. Oh, you know, let me do this really quick. Folks, you’re listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. What about, I mean, as you age, even as you hit middle age, my eyes are getting worse. But, and that’s just me in my 50s. When you get into your, what’s so funny? Speaker 2 Because you said earlier, about your birthday. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, about my age. Speaker 2 About your birthday. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 You’re your age. So I’m questioning it now. Speaker 1 I’m sorry. I did. I told you I was 35, didn’t I? Speaker 1 I didn’t think you believed me, but I… I did. But, you know, your hearing starts to go. You got to get all that checked. Speaker 2 What did you say? You know, and your vision. Yep. Speaker 2 Those are key. Your eyes, your vision. You know, you want… Speaker 2 Again, that’s part of your wellness business. Even your dentist. Speaker 1 You know, people have a dental fear, even in their 20s. Oh, dental phobia. Speaker 2 Yeah. But you got to go to the dentist because the last thing you want to do is lose your teeth. or you have your teeth all kind of wonky. Speaker 2 You know, you want to go to the dentist. Every six months, get your cleanings. I mean, I’ve been lucky. Speaker 2 For some reason, my teeth, you know, I don’t get cavities. I don’t know what’s going on there. Some people, I guess, have these teeth where they don’t have. Speaker 2 I don’t know. I know. I know. Speaker 2 On the flip side, my husband’s teeth are just root canals and scrapings and scalings. And I’m like, so I can’t really say. I think you should go to – I’m going to recommend you go to the dentist, but I’m not going to harp on that too much because I feel bad because for some reason – now, watch. Speaker 2 I get like 10 cavities, which would be karma, right? Good. I do have to have a wisdom tooth pulled. Speaker 2 I will say that. Now? Really? Speaker 2 I have one left. Yes. I know. Speaker 1 I had them all pulled. I have one left. Speaker 2 I should have done that. I had one pulled when I was pregnant with my son, and then I had another two pulled, but this one’s kind of left and hanging out. Speaker 1 I had two that needed to come out in my early 20s or early to mid-20s, and I had to go to an oral surgeon. The oral surgeon goes, listen, I got to take these two out. Absolutely. Speaker 1 They must be killing you, he says. But you got two others that are not bothering you at all. They’re hidden. Speaker 1 They’re going to come out in about five or six years. They’re going to start, but I can see them. So here’s your option. Speaker 1 I’m putting you under anesthesia. I can just get all four and be done with it or I don’t have to and they’re not going to bother you for another five years. You probably need them out in five to six years. Speaker 1 We can cross that bridge then if you’d rather. And I go, well, if I’m already out and you’re already doing this, take them all out. And he goes. Speaker 2 Smart. Because this one they think I’ve got an oral surgeon and it might be wrapped around. That’s what I’m saying. Speaker 2 I didn’t go to the dentist for years. And then I started going. Actually, my daughter and my son was in kindergarten because one of the parents that worked there was a dentist. Speaker 2 a hygienist. And that’s how I ended up going. She was like, you haven’t been to the dentist? Speaker 1 And I was like, so I started going to the dentist. And no cavities? No, I’ve got these teeth Speaker 2 that, I don’t know. What about Speaker 1 keeping medications in order? I would imagine it’s easy to confuse them. Speaker 2 Yeah. I mean, what’s good is nowadays certain doctors, PCPs, do kind of have these systems. I don’t know how they do it. Speaker 2 It’s kind of almost scary. But they have these systems where they seem to know, like my doctor, when I go to my doctor, she’s like, are you still taking this medication? And I’m like, what medication? Because I had gone maybe to the emergency room because I had, you know, pain or sprained something. And I’m like, what medication is that? I don’t even think I ever filled the prescription. But it was good that they do that. She’ll go through, my APRN will go through all my medications where I’ve been that year when I come in for my physical. So some organizations have those, some don’t. So you’ve got your heart doctor over here, your other OBGYN over here. So no one’s kind of talking to each other. So you could be having medications that are interacting all over the place. So it’s really important that you review your medication list. Speaker 2 And you can probably do that with either like your pharmacist or actually the best thing to do is do with your primary care physician to sit down with them and say, okay, what am I taking for medications? Is something interacting? Because that can cause trouble as well. Speaker 1 I would imagine a good night’s sleep goes a long way. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. And I’m so bad with that, but it really is important to get your sleep. Yeah, and you can’t catch up on sleep. I know that. Speaker 1 I do know that. Speaker 2 You cannot. People say, oh, I’m catching up on my sleep. No such thing. Speaker 2 You’re doing nothing. You’re lazy and resting and taking a nap, which I do every Sunday. But you’re not catching up on anything. Speaker 1 So I was talking about sleep one morning and how sleep deprived I am because I do the morning show. Speaker 2 But you’re probably used to it. Speaker 1 You never get used to it. Speaker 2 Okay. Speaker 1 Believe it. I’ve been doing this for four years. Only four years? Speaker 1 Four years. I was Brad Davis’s co-host my first seven or eight months. And then when COVID came, his family didn’t want him to leave. Speaker 1 But then his health started to decline. He went to the VA. And I thought I was just keeping his seat warm. Speaker 1 But yeah. Yeah. So I’ll start my fifth year in July. Speaker 1 So I’m winding down my fourth year. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 So what was I even talking about? The sleep deprivation. Speaker 1 Oh, thank you. Speaker 2 And the fact that your memory might be. Speaker 1 Well, it probably is. So I’m talking about how I used to go to bed so late, and I get up at, my first alarm goes off at 4.15. My second alarm goes off at 4.30. Speaker 1 That’s when I get out of bed. So I get out of bed at 4.30 on my second alarm. I’m laying in, now I go to bed at 10 o’clock. Speaker 1 But here’s the problem. I’m staring at the ceiling. It’s now 10.30. Speaker 1 Now 11. Now 11.30. Now 12. Speaker 1 You don’t do, what is it, melatonin? Okay. So I’m talking about this on here one time. Speaker 2 I always said melatonin, the one in your skin. Did I get the right one? Melatonin? Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah. A listener calls me and says he’s a sleep doctor. Speaker 1 His name is Jim. So I had this conversation with him off the air. I met with him. Speaker 1 Brilliant guy. He tells me about the melatonin and all this stuff. I try everything. Speaker 1 Melatonin messes with my stomach. Oh, my goodness. Speaker 2 yeah okay so i plus you wake up like you go to sleep but then you wake up after three hours depending on when you go to sleep so it it puts you to sleep but sometimes for me it doesn’t keep Speaker 1 me asleep it’s a terrible sleep and i i didn’t like it oh oh it doesn’t yeah i don’t know what it is so now i go to bed at 10 o’clock during the weeknights and i’m but i’m talking i’m just staring at the ceiling. Then I tried music. Speaker 2 Yeah. You got to do the hypnotist tapes. Speaker 1 Oh, I didn’t do that. Yeah, where you fall asleep. Speaker 2 They actually have those other, what are they called? The self-hypnosis, but there’s also the tapes you listen to and the person talking underneath the music, but you don’t know they’re talking. It’s kind of cool. Speaker 1 Subliminal, yes. Subliminal. Speaker 2 That’s what you got to do. Because you’re listening to the music and then underneath the music, there’s talking, but you can’t, you can hear it, but you can’t, like your subconscious can hear. Getting hungry. But you should do that. That’ll put you to sleep. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 2 Well, before we wrap things up, any last-minute tips that you can give us? Bones. Take care of your bones. Speaker 2 Oh, your bones. Yes, because a lot of older adults, unfortunately, are at risk of, obviously, their bone health is important. Get your bone density test. Speaker 2 Manage your aches and pains. That’s important. So yoga, meditation, acupuncture, and other stuff to manage your pain. Speaker 2 Talk to your doctor about that because something’s not right. Pay attention if you’re in pain. We talked about your eyes. Speaker 2 We talked about your hearing. Oh, your feet. Take care of your feet. Speaker 2 Your feet. Take care of your feet. You don’t want to have inappropriate footwear. Speaker 2 Yeah, because that’ll mess you up as well. Speaker 1 Wow. Speaker 2 And good, clean living. We talked about that. Speaker 1 And maybe a glass of wine every night. Speaker 2 Every one, yeah. Speaker 1 Feed your soul. Speaker 2 Feed your soul. Remember mind, body, and spirit. Speaker 1 And let’s not forget mental health is a huge component to all this. Yes, yes. That’s right. Take care of mind, body, and soul. Speaker 2 Forgiveness and grace. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 2 Love and peace. Good stuff this morning. Speaker 1 Words of wisdom I think anybody could live by. Exactly. At any age. Speaker 1 Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. By the way, Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community. It’s nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. Speaker 1 Those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care and a whole lot more. We’re talking charming cottages with a true neighborhood feel. They’re all available to rent adjacent to the main building where those who need more assistance reside. Speaker 1 Please visit AveryHeights.org or by calling 860-953-1201. Again, that’s 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Thank you so much for listening. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. 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This episode you will learn when… **Categories:** Healthy Aging & Wellness **Tags:** Healthy Aging, Wellness --- ### [Harmony and Music](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/harmony-and-music/) **Published:** February 8, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Tara Jenkins, of Harmony in Dementia, shares how customized music therapy can increase socialization and emotional well-being. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good weekend to you, everybody, and welcome to your next chapter, Senior Living. It’s a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. It is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Speaker 1 Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way we think about aging, senior living, and the retirement years. It is time to celebrate our seniors and give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, inner peace, and the courage to never give up on So we will discuss exciting opportunities, important resources for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Well, good morning, Siobhan. Good morning. Speaker 2 Good to see you. How’s your week been? Very good. I have some awesome news. Speaker 1 Awesome news? Yes. Is this something you can divulge? Speaker 2 It is, yeah. I can’t wait! Yes, we’ve been waiting forever to get the results. So the Avery Heights, the Heights of Avery, the Heights at Avery Heights is the best of senior living for 2022, 2023 for a place for mom. You know, so like Joan London has said, no, I’m just kidding. Speaker 1 Is she going to stop down and do the issue? Speaker 2 She is. We’re like besties now. Nice. Speaker 2 Tell her I said hello. All right. Miss London. Speaker 2 We did get a really nice award, though. It’s all glass. And yeah, it’s really nice. Speaker 1 You’ll have to forgive me for not looking too surprised. I’ve been to a number of these facilities. Well, not in a few years, but you really do have it going on at Avery. It’s funny because when I talk about the people, whether it’s on the morning show or just the people who bring up this show throughout the week is, you know, listen, anybody can brag about, oh, how great they are. But the proof is in the pudding. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 I mean, any ball player will tell you that, hey, they’re the greatest. Any athlete will tell you. But the stats don’t lie. Speaker 1 Right. Okay? So sometimes people are a legend in their own mind a little bit. Speaker 1 Well, just talk to the residents. And that’s what I did when I broadcasted the morning show. You had a lot of fans there. Speaker 1 Well, yeah, but that aside, I talked to people and asked. And I’ll never forget one person. It was a woman who said, I should have come here sooner. Speaker 1 I know another person said that they, at first, they didn’t want to go to some old folks home. You know, and I’m like, oh, geez. Okay, well. Speaker 1 And I’m like, well, any regrets? I’m like, oh, I love it here. And I’m like, well, there you go. Speaker 1 This is not like, I don’t want to, it’s so cliche to say this is not your parents’ old folks home. I mean, this is it’s a continuum of care, senior living facility where there are people as independent as can be. Yes, that’s the best part. Speaker 1 Yes. And then there’s, you know, those who need more observation. And then sadly, you know, there are those who need the memory care. Speaker 2 Yes. But even that’s like a lively place. I remember walking in there one day. Speaker 2 What was the holiday? And she had she had what was it? It was maybe it was Cinco de Mayo. Speaker 2 I think it was. And she had they had all this stuff on their heads, like Mexican hats and all this stuff. And I was coming in with a tour. Speaker 2 And so it was just like, it looked kind of kooky, I have to be honest. But I’m just like, but it was so lively and they had the music going and the, you know, what are those? Cucarachas? Speaker 2 Yeah, maracas. Maracas, thank you. And it was just great. Speaker 2 But it was really funny because I was just like, dude, can you tone down the silly when I have tourists coming? But it was perfect. Speaker 1 You know what’s really unique or kind of cool about it is imagine being in an environment where your peers have everything in common with you. It’s one thing to have. You can have the best care providers. Speaker 1 I know people in their 20s who are health care providers, and they’re phenomenal what they do. But as phenomenal as what they do, they can’t relate to the stories of your generation. You have to have been there. Speaker 1 The movies, the music, the culture of the times. If you live through, you talk to somebody who, I mean, they’d be in their 90s now, but you talk to somebody who lived through the Great Depression. I don’t care. Speaker 1 You can’t say, oh, I know what it’s like. No, you don’t know what it’s like. But when you are, when your neighbor or somebody that you’re having coffee with or you’re just shooting the breeze with had very similar experiences in life because they lived through that era. Speaker 1 There’s something to be said for that. And before we, I want you to bring in our guest this morning, but people have that experience where they go to the senior center once a week. Right. Speaker 1 And then it’s sad because they’re wasting time. And then sometimes they don’t get back there until the following week. Right. Speaker 1 You know, or it’ll go a couple times a week, but they see their friend that one day, you know. Well, imagine having at your disposal that kind of community, where you get to see different folks from your era, from the times that you remember, you know, growing up or working and it’s relatable. Speaker 2 Right. Or the same circumstances, too, because we do have a lot of people who are widows, people that have their spouse as a veteran. There’s different other circumstances that are similar. Speaker 2 You know, maybe they were a nurse. So there’s all sorts of circumstances. That’s a great point. Speaker 2 That kind of bring folks together. And it’s easier. I think life is, it’s like, you know, a huge support group because it’s easier. Speaker 2 You don’t have to keep telling, like you said, your story, especially if you’re a widower or you’re a widow. It’s kind of like, you know, who wants to keep kind of like talking about it? You could just say a couple of words and the person will know where you’re at. Speaker 2 You know what I mean? Oh, I miss him today. You don’t have to explain why do you miss someone that’s been gone for 15 years. Speaker 2 They’ll get it. Speaker 1 And the independent living aspect of it is, you know, listen, there are days when, huh, I don’t want to see much of anybody. Right. You know, I’m having my, you know, I’m having not a good day for whatever reason. Speaker 1 Right. And it just happens. I guess we just sit home and read or put the, you know, or put the radio on or something. Speaker 1 We’ll go to the library too. Yeah, exactly. The library’s nice and yeah. Speaker 1 And then there’s days where you like some company and there’s days you like a lot of And that’s independent living. You do what you want. You want to be around loads of people? Speaker 1 You can. Options. The options are there. Speaker 1 The options are there. You’ve got to guess. You’ve been talking about a lot, and I want you to have the opportunity to introduce. Speaker 2 Yes. So, you know, in the world of COVID, it definitely has its advantages. You get to meet people online. Speaker 2 You know, we’re more open to kind of opening our borders and reaching out. And so I have great pleasure of meeting Tara Jenkins. She owns a company. Speaker 2 She’s a founder and owner of Harmony and Dementia Music Matters. This is very, very close to my heart. I just remember the first time I saw someone listen to music that has dementia and then just come to life. Speaker 2 And I was fascinated. I was like, this is, I mean, you can have people that don’t know what they had for lunch or anything like that. But you put on the right song and they know all the words to it and sing it beautifully. Speaker 2 And I just think it’s an amazing thing. And so we haven’t really talked a lot about that on our show. And I thought I’d bring in an expert. Speaker 2 And I want to introduce Ms. Tara Jenkins. Hey, Tara. Speaker 1 Tara, good morning. Hey. Speaker 2 Thank you. Good morning. Speaker 1 Great to have you with us. Speaker 2 All the way from Texas. Great to be here. Speaker 1 Yeah, you are all the way from Texas. Speaker 3 I am. Yeah, I’m out in the Austin, Texas area. I am an East Post gal originally. I was born and raised in New Jersey. Speaker 1 Very nice. What brought you to Texas? Speaker 3 So my husband’s job. So, yeah, we I spent a good amount of my time after college in Washington, D.C. area. And I met my husband out there, got married out there, and then we moved for a job of his. So we’ve been out here about six years now. Speaker 2 Nice. Speaker 1 Very nice. Do you get back to the Northeast at all? Speaker 3 Yeah, I do somewhat frequently. We actually, everyone in Texas thought we were crazy, but we just, for Christmas, we drove to New Jersey from Texas. So we did like a huge, like two week long trip and drove so we could bring our dog. Speaker 3 And it was great. It was just, you know, we paced ourselves and planned it out. But it’s, I don’t know, I think it’s like 26 hours if you were to drive it straight through. Speaker 1 So it was a long time. Goodness. Good for you. Speaker 1 So we have heard over the years the importance of music for people with dementia and Alzheimer’s. It reminds me a little bit of Tony Bennett. Tony Bennett, and this is no secret, so I’m not divulging any secret here, suffers from dementia. I actually saw Tony Bennett in concert about 10 years ago. Speaker 1 He’s got a daughter, I think it’s a daughter, that says, this guy can sing just about every song he’s recorded. But he couldn’t remember certain members of, maybe his kids he remembers. But I’m trying to remember, I’m paraphrasing here. Speaker 1 This is a while since I’ve heard this. But there are members of his friends that he had known for years or members of his family who look familiar to him. but aren’t quite, he’s not quite sure who he is, but you have him sing these songs. Speaker 1 He knows every word. What is that? I mean, that’s kind of unique, isn’t it? Speaker 1 Or maybe not so. Yeah. Speaker 3 So it really has to do with music itself. And so if you’re a performer, it’s going to be even more kind of embedded in you. So when you use an example like Tony Bennett, but even you and I, someone who just maybe listens to music leisurely. Speaker 3 What’s so great about music is it activates many areas of our brain, and it includes those areas associated with memory and emotion. So we can all listen to the same song, and we’re all going to have different reactions and emotions based on past experiences. And our neurons continue to fire until a connection is made. Speaker 3 So this is one of the many reasons why it’s so powerful with folks living with dementia. You know, and in general, when you think of music and health, you know, there’s lots of research studies out there about, you know, how music can help with depression and anxiety, how it can bring your blood pressure down, you know, and stabilize your heart rate. And the same is true for folks with dementia. There are a lot of studies out there about it being a non-pharmacological approach. So using music therapy, using music in a very specific way with older adults living with dementia and helping decrease some of those symptoms that come with living with dementia. Speaker 3 So, you know, if you think of your favorite song, it could be a song you dance to at your wedding. It could be a song that your parents sang to you. It could be the first concert you ever saw. Speaker 3 You know, those are some examples of what connects us emotionally to a time and place. And when we hear those specific melodies, it brings us right back. And so that’s another reason why it’s so important with older adults. Speaker 3 What I love about music is we can all hear the same song, as I mentioned earlier, and we’re all going to have a different response and association to it. And older adults have those strong emotional responses, even when they’re no longer verbally communicating or otherwise responding to typical methods of care, which is another reason why music can be so important with individuals living with dementia. So being able to provide older adults a way to access experiences and express a range of emotions can really be a substantial improvement to their quality of life. Speaker 1 Tara, is it only music or in audio or are there visuals, movies or home movies that can also trigger the memory for dementia care? Speaker 3 Yeah, I, you know, my expertise is more in the music area. But, yeah, you know, if you I had a client in my internship with MS and, you know, she shared her very specific story was. She was recognizing that she was starting to become forgetful and she wanted to document. Speaker 3 She had such strong emotional connections and memories associated with music and at this point could recall them. So we started a memory book for her where any music we shared, I would document the memory she associated with them. And then this way she would have it. Speaker 3 So if she wanted to flip through it, it would be another way to remind her or, you know, she could put on these songs that she enjoyed, which then might help assist with recalling those specific events in her life. And one thing that comes to mind to me is Sisters, the song Sisters from White Christmas. She loved that movie. Speaker 3 She loved that song. And so at one point, and now this is 15, 16 years ago, so it wasn’t as easy to bring in video, like portable video stuff. But, you know, I brought in a short clip of Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye singing and dancing to Sisters. Speaker 3 and you know it brought her right back yeah it brought her right back to that moment when she first saw it at that movie as a kid with her family you know and then she was able to tell me quite a bit that was how she was personally connected to the song so yeah yeah uh so i do recommend that you know if you’re a music therapist i’m not really using videos in my session i’m using a lot of live music as a music therapist uh what we like to do you know we’re a clinical and and space practice, and we’re using music to accomplish individualized goals. So, you know, when we’re working with older adults, we might be providing opportunities for meaningful connections, reminiscence, creative expression, increasing socialization with peers, family, and friends, encouraging communication, decreasing isolation, stress, and agitation. So a lot of what I do is in the moment. And, you know, I might come in with a plan of like, okay, this is what we’re going to do today, but I also very much take into what’s going on, you know, so it’s like anything else, you know, you have to adapt and kind of see where people are at. Or, you know, if I share Danny boy, and somebody becomes visibly upset, again, something I always like to share with folks, especially caregivers, is music can bring up a lot of emotions all at the same time. And like to remind people that that’s not necessarily the case. And with a lot of folks living with dementia, they no longer can verbally communicate. So it might be the only way that they can emotionally express how they’re feeling. And so, you know, the tearfulness is okay. But if I’m singing Danny Boy, and it’s really causing somebody to become distraught or upset, you know, I’m going to go over, I’m going to hand them a tissue, I’m going to, you know, show them positive body language. And then I might ask them, you know, should, you know, do we want to move on to another song? Or is it okay to keep singing? Because sometimes they need to, that’s that outlet of expression. And that’s the way that they’re trying to express themselves. And then sometimes you do need to, you know, adapt in the moment and kind of switch gears. So it really just depends on what’s happening. And then just also being hyper aware of, you know, their body language, their facial expressions you know if they are able to verbally communicate with you you know really listen to what they’re saying um you know if their words are jumbled and they’re communicating their their tone and inflection of voice and that’s going to give you a lot and that also guides me in Speaker 1 my work as well isn’t that fascinating yeah i i i can so even a person without dementia there are songs right now that if i heard trigger emotion from my past good bad happy or sad you know um yeah what a tool to be able to utilize is this relatively new or uh a new method or are there are there new methods that that you’re able to kind of pull out of the toolbox so to Speaker 3 speak. So we’ve been, you know, music therapy itself as like a profession dates back to, I think, I believe it’s early, you know, World War I. Doctors and nurses started to see that when they brought in musicians for the soldiers who were recovering, they started to notice a lot of physiological symptoms decrease as well as positive increases in mental health. And so the profession kind of developed from there. And so we’ve been in profession for a good amount of time. Speaker 3 But I do think, you know, in recent years, there has been a lot of, for lack of a better word, a lot of buzz around music and dementia. But, you know, I’ve been in the field, I’ve been in the elder care field as a music therapist for 16 years. I’ve been doing this for a long time, and sharing music with folks in a variety of different ways. And so there is a lot of research out there to support it, you know, not only as a non-pharmological approach, which is huge for a lot of people when you think of side effects with a lot of different medications and things like that, especially if you have someone, you know, who is becoming frustrated or agitated. If you know that that’s happening at a certain time of day, can you pair their preferred music? Preferred Would you pair preferred music, you know, if maybe four o’clock is a hard time for them, maybe start at like 3.30, 3.45, you know, and see if that helps or is there a specific activity that you could redirect, you know, to them at that time. Speaker 3 And so with music, there’s so much that you can do and so much that can be done as a music therapist. You know, not everyone can be trained to be a music therapist, but there are still ways that you can utilize the benefits of music, if that makes sense. Speaker 1 Yeah, it does. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning is the founder and owner of Harmony and Dementia, Tara Jenkins. Speaker 1 Tell us a little bit about your services. I mean, what you do. Yeah, I’d love to know more about it. Speaker 3 Sure. So I got started, I kind of got started in music therapy. I worked full time as an activities director and a music therapist kind of wearing multiple hats and then started a private practice in DC. And then when I moved to Austin, worked for a local company. And then about eight months ago, I decided I wanted to go back in a private practice. And so I provide a variety of services And the goal for my company is, you know, my main goals are to advocate for the importance of music accessibility and education for care partners and elder care professionals. Speaker 3 I want to make sure that I’m participating in creative musical caregiving experiences, delivering personalized care and support. That’s a really big one for me is making sure that, you know, everything is personalized and individualized. And with music therapy, we can tailor programs specifically for a community, for that individual, for that group along the way. Speaker 3 You know, I design workshops, again, that are individualized. And then I like to share tips, tools, and resources to meaningfully engage people living with dementia. So it really distinguishes my company as my person-centered approach. Speaker 3 I believe in treating everyone with dignity and respect. And, you know, I want to make sure that I’m getting to know that individual’s interests and their preferences and encouraging those moment to moment connections. So I’m sorry, music and without music. Speaker 1 Yeah. Do you have music wellness workshops or consultations and things like that? Speaker 3 Yep. So, yeah, I have a couple of different things. So as far as music wellness workshops, I’ve got ones where, you know, I believe it’s not one size fits all. Speaker 3 So, again, this goes to tailoring and making something customizable. But some of my most popular topics, I’ve got one that is, you know, how to take the music further. So it’s practical resources to meaningfully engage with your loved one. Speaker 3 So this workshop is tailored for caregivers and care partners, and especially if they’re caring for a loved one in the home. And this workshop goes into practical tips and resources on how to best utilize music. You know, you learn about why music is beneficial for older adults, how to set up a comfortable environment for music listening, how to determine music preferences, which is huge, huge. Speaker 3 Going back to preferred music, that makes a really big difference. And then how to enhance music listening. So it’s more than just playing a song. Speaker 3 So, you know, what to do before, during and after a song is played. And so that is one that’s really popular. Another one that’s pretty popular is called Living in Harmony, and it’s music and self-care for care partners. So this one is really all about how care partners and caregivers can utilize music in their self-care. And so we go through, you know, the different pillars of self-care and how music can relate to each one of those. Speaker 3 And with those two topics, they can be adapted for professionals. So, you know, if I was working with a home care agency and training their staff, I could do, you know, the practical resources to meaningfully engage in music. I can adapt that for professionals. Speaker 3 And the same goes with senior living communities. You know, I can come in and present to staff for continuing education and share with them, okay, here’s how, you know, you can’t call yourself a music therapist or say that it’s music therapy, but you can still use music in a beneficial way. And here are the tools and the resources to help you do that. Speaker 1 Tara, I mean, it’s wonderful. I’m listening to how you support caregivers. But you’re in Texas, and we’re in Connecticut. Speaker 1 So, I mean, are there ways that you can provide your type of service to clients that are in Connecticut? Or, like, do you do virtual things? Yeah. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 3 Yeah, so I work with folks all over the country and with all of my services. So those are the workshops. I do music consultation as well. Speaker 3 So sometimes that’s one 30-minute phone call or, you know, an hour Zoom where I’m helping activity directors. You know, maybe they want to build a music therapy program and they want to hire a music therapist, but they’re not really sure where to start. You know, or maybe it’s about how best to utilize music volunteers. Speaker 3 So how can you best utilize volunteers? One way to do that is sharing music. So I might work in that way. Speaker 3 And then, of course, I provide direct music therapy services, both group and individual services. And all three of those can be virtual as well as in person. So during the pandemic, I led a lot of groups and I led a lot of individual services, and I still do some of that via telehealth. Speaker 3 When it comes to direct music therapy services, there’s an assessment that takes place no matter who I see. You know, whether it’s a group or individual, we always have an assessment process and then we base our treatment off of that. With telehealth, there’s an assessment process to make sure that it will be beneficial for that loved one living with dementia. Speaker 3 Early stages, sometimes middle stages, telehealth can be really appropriate. But in those later stages, it really kind of depends. You know, and there’s a variety of factors there. Speaker 3 And I will say, you know, some of my telehealth services is working with that spouse, that care partner, you know, and they’re there in the session with them. And so then that’s a very different experience. So again, it’s all about, you know, after that assessment, what is that individual looking for with dementia? Speaker 3 What are they looking to get out of the session? What is their family member or their caregiver? You know, what are they wanting? Speaker 3 And so all of my treatment is then based on that. You know, it’s based on my assessment and what I think would be beneficial, as well as what I would think would be beneficial for them. Speaker 1 Tara, I’m running out of time. I’m so sorry. I got one minute. Speaker 1 Maybe you can answer. Give me like the quick one, less than one minute answer to the, how can you give us some simple ways, you know, a caregiver can incorporate music into their care plan for their loved one? And if you can, maybe in less than a minute. Speaker 1 I’m sorry. Speaker 3 All right. I will do my best. I can chat forever. Speaker 3 So, yeah. So some ways that you might be able to use music is using music as a motivator. So if you’re trying to get someone to move or exercise or, you know, during ADLs, so bath and shower care, you know, once you’ve got the room set up and the temperature is right and everything is where you need it. Speaker 3 You know, maybe you play some of their preferred music as you’re walking to the bathroom and then you play it while you’re in there. So that’s a way you can use music as kind of a distraction and you can use it as a way to redirect them to something positive and use it as a motivator as well. All right. Speaker 3 Another thing you, yeah, yeah. If that’s all the time I’ve got. I am so sorry. Speaker 1 If we keep on going, the next show is going to start automatically, whether we’re still talking or not. So I want to thank, I do want to thank you folks. You’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Speaker 1 Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, Right smack dab in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington and Hartford. And those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted to memory care and a whole lot more. There’s charming houses and cottages with a true neighborhood feel. Speaker 1 They’re all available to rent adjacent to the main building where those who need more assistance reside. please visit AveryHeights.org or by calling 860-953-1201. Again, it’s 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community unlike any other. Speaker 1 Folks, I want to thank our guest this morning, founder and owner of Harmony and Dementia, Tara Jenkins. I also want to thank my co-host over here, Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Thanks so much for listening. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. 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Listen as Chef Tim Barber, Director of Dining Services at The Heights, talks about how important the dining experience is – from offering a variety of heart- and brain-healthy, gourmet meal options to making the dining room itself a comfortable place where residents can socialize. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter of production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights is a 43 acre senior living community with a full costume of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now this show provides helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your living communities in a whole, along with Siobhan Mattingly. Speaker 1 I’m Gary Byers. Siobhan, nice to see you. Speaker 2 Nice to see you. Speaker 1 You look very nice. Speaker 2 Thank you. Speaker 1 How has, I was going to ask you how your last week has been, but I want to ask you how your summer is going so far as well. Speaker 2 Really good. Really good. Yeah. I’m having fun going to the beach. Speaker 1 Are you a beach person? Speaker 2 I’m a beach person. I love the beach. Speaker 1 Yeah, me too. Speaker 2 Beach is my piece. Speaker 1 I can go to the beach year-round, though. Speaker 2 Me, too. Speaker 1 I love the beach. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. We go on Mother’s Day every year and walk around. Speaker 1 Wait, but that’s in May. Speaker 2 But still, it can be cold. It can be cold. Speaker 1 How about, do you ever go in, like, January? Speaker 2 I’ve never gone in January. Speaker 1 Just to take a ride down. First of all, there’s nobody. Speaker 2 There’s nobody driving around there. I’ve gone in December. Speaker 1 Yeah, okay. Speaker 2 Because my husband proposed to me. Yeah. He knew. He knew what to do. Speaker 1 There is just something real serene about just listening to the waves crash. It’s amazing. And really inhaling the salt air. It really is soothing for me. Speaker 2 Yeah, the best was when I went to Jamaica. I mean, the water was just perfect. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 I know, right? Speaker 1 Take me away. Speaker 2 That’s our show. We’re off to the beach. Speaker 1 We got to get a travel agent to do a show. Boy, I got to try the product a little bit before I do the show. So you’re enjoying the beach. Speaker 1 You’re enjoying your summer. Tell me, how’s your last week been? What have you been up to? Speaker 1 Anything? What have you been up to? Speaker 2 Getting prepared. My son is actually getting married on Sunday. But it’s a wedding celebration. Speaker 2 So he’s already married. I already have a grandson. So it’s a wedding celebration. Speaker 2 Up in Mass, right? Or is it? Yes. Speaker 2 I remember that. Newburyport. By the beach. Speaker 2 By the beach. Got to do it. Like mom? Speaker 2 Yeah. So that’s a lot. It’s a lot. Speaker 2 Because this is the big wedding. They did the small wedding in the backyard. Now this is the big wedding. Speaker 2 So it’s exciting. Very nice. So I’m trying to fit into my dress. Speaker 2 Sure. Yeah. Speaker 1 I don’t think there’ll be problems. Come on. Speaker 2 You never know. I try to eat healthy. I’ve been eating healthy all week. Speaker 1 Speaking of eating. Speaker 2 I know. Speaker 1 You guys at Avery Heights are known for your cuisine. Speaker 2 Yeah, the food is very good. Speaker 1 I’ve had some. Now, granted, it’s been many years. But I’ve eaten. Speaker 1 I’ve had some cuisine from Avery Heights probably 15 years ago. This goes a little bit back. But I know. Speaker 1 You’ve talked about it. We’ve been doing this show maybe a couple of months now. Speaker 2 you brought up the food on probably half those shows so i think we’re we’re we’re really i am all about the food people look at me and go do you eat i love the food i’m all about the food all Speaker 1 right so when somebody comes in and they have an initial consultation how often does food or menu yeah or diet how often does that come up a lot a lot and i always try to offer lunch or dinner Speaker 2 and the guys are great about doing that. The dining staff is amazing. I actually, yesterday, myself and a couple of staff members ate in the dining room. Speaker 2 I had the Kentucky bourbon chicken. It was amazing. They had the sirloin tips and we got weighted on. Speaker 2 It was all fancy and it was really, it was, they do a nice job. It’s definitely an amazing dining experience. You want to introduce our guest? Speaker 2 Yes, that’s why I’m saying all these nice things. So I’m very proud to introduce the wonderful Tim. He is our dining director. Speaker 2 he’s amazing hopefully i got your title right he’s amazing he does a great job um he runs an incredible crew um and i’m just so proud to have him here today thank you you’re welcome you’re welcome you can pay me later pleasure no actually your reputation precedes you really because i i’m Speaker 1 not even embellishing this one iota uh of the eight show i don’t know six seven eight shows that we’ve done half of them food has come up what’s the let’s start off with something pretty simple The atmosphere. Speaker 3 Sure. Speaker 1 And in the Avery Heights dining room. What is that like? Speaker 3 Well, the atmosphere, it’s a restaurant-style setting that’s comfortable. Upscale restaurant-style setting that’s comfortable. Being comfortable is probably the most important thing for the residents because it’s their home. Speaker 1 Sure. Yeah. How important, though, would you say menu planning is? Is there a thought that goes into it? Because I would imagine. Speaker 3 Menu planning is really important. Speaker 1 Yeah, the more people you get involved in this, you know, the more, well, I can’t have this and I can’t have that. It’s one of the reasons why sometimes food at venues are bland because you have to make it bland and then have everybody individually doctor it up because everybody’s got their own either allergies or whatever they don’t like. So how do you navigate around that? Speaker 3 Well, variety is probably the most important thing when planning for a menu. Some people just like fish or several residents that only want to eat fish. So we like to have two fish options usually on the menu. Speaker 3 We always have salmon on the menu. Salmon’s always on the menu. That’s one of our things. Speaker 3 There’s always three specials that change. We have a rotating six-week menu. So three new specials every day along with a soup of the day and a low-sodium soup. Speaker 3 That changes every day. Always a choice of two salads. Tenderloin is always on the menu. Speaker 3 So if you want to come in and eat tenderloin. Speaker 1 Always? Really? Probably not healthy to eat tenderloin every day. Probably not your healthiest choice. Speaker 3 But we want residents to be comfortable. They should have the choice. Speaker 2 And the salmon is good too. I usually eat the salmon a couple times a week. And they make it perfect. Speaker 2 Like it’s not dry. Yeah. And that’s a tough one to cook. Speaker 2 And it’s never dry. It’s never bad. Speaker 1 This is upscale here. Speaker 3 It’s definitely upscale dining way up here. Speaker 1 What if somebody comes in and just says, that’s all fine and dandy, two, three nights a week. You know what I just want tonight? Speaker 3 A burger, juicy, or a pizza. Speaker 1 I want a couple of pieces of pizza. Speaker 3 Absolutely. Having a burger is an option on the menu every day. If they just want a sandwich, they can come in and have a sandwich. Speaker 3 Whether it’s a tuna sandwich, egg salad sandwich, turkey, ham. If they want to come in and have breakfast for dinner, that’s their choice. They can come have breakfast for dinner. Speaker 3 That’s on the menu every day, too. Speaker 1 How about a healthy? I would imagine health and nutrition is a part of the thought process that goes into coming up with these menus. Yep. Speaker 3 Health is definitely important to a point. It’s important to definitely have low sodium options on the menu for residents, which is important. Speaker 2 Low sugar. Speaker 3 That tastes good. Speaker 1 True. Yeah, but how do you accomplish that? Speaker 3 It’s all about the marinade. Skipping the salt, and all about the marinade. Whether it’s a wine marinade, that really keeps food from being bland. Speaker 3 Yes. So we’re all about to marinate. Almost everything’s marinated at every height. Speaker 3 For flavor, to enhance flavor. We have a nice low-sodium grilled piece of chicken that’s marinated in red wine vinegar, along with oregano, a little bit of garlic. And it’s very popular. Speaker 3 Low-sodium. And it sells. People love it. Speaker 3 It’s healthy, too. Speaker 1 Well, I mean, it’s got to be healthy. You know, especially just all the different… I don’t know. Speaker 1 I guess diets that people have. You talk about low sodium. You talk about low sugar. Speaker 2 But also medication, too, because there’s some people that can’t have a lot of greens. Speaker 3 We do have some challenges with various diets. Speaker 2 Have to cut it up, different things like that. Oh, I didn’t even think about that. Speaker 3 Absolutely. Yeah. They call it mechanically cut food, but it’s basically just chopped up food in small pieces. Speaker 1 So you’re responsible for that, too. The client isn’t responsible for cutting their own food. Speaker 3 We do that for our residents, too. Speaker 2 And the wait staff knows that, too. So it is upscale and it’s really fancy, but the wait staff is aware of Mrs. Jones’s need to have her food cut up. Speaker 3 The chef cuts up the food or sometimes their servers will actually just cut it right at the table if they ask. Speaker 1 I’m going to ask a silly question here. If somebody just said, I want a beer. Speaker 3 OK. Speaker 1 You know, can they have a beer? Speaker 3 Well, we have happy hour every Friday. So on Fridays, residents are allowed to drink. If they like to bring in their own beer, they can bring in their own beer whenever they want. Speaker 3 Friday is the beer day. If you want beer, you want wine, you want a mixed drink, come in, enjoy a happy hour. It’s a great social time for the residents. Speaker 2 Really good appetizers. Speaker 3 They have a great time. That’s a great way for new residents to meet people. Speaker 1 Sounds like we’re at a pub here. Speaker 3 Yeah, it’s nice. It’s packed. We pass around nice appetizers. Sometimes we have bacon wrapped scallops or, you know, maybe I’ll make a… What’s the flaky one? Speaker 2 The flake… We did a… Spin a… Speaker 3 A brie and feel the dough. Speaker 2 Yes, yes. I know. I was passing the hors d’oeuvres one day and I was like, what is this? And I had to keep on trying to remember what it is. I know. Speaker 1 It’s funny that your producer, Ryan, just chimed in saying, can I move there? I’m like, I’m sitting here going, these people have it made. Oh, my goodness. Where do you find… Every day. Speaker 3 Yeah. We do encourage guests to come. So, I mean, it’s a low price for all this food that we offer. It’s $18.90, $18.95. To encourage residents to bring guests. Speaker 2 And we have the private dining room as well. Speaker 3 So, you know, it’s not a bad deal. I also don’t charge them to rent out the private diner. Speaker 1 How often does that get rented? Speaker 2 A lot. Yeah, they’ll say pretty often. It’s just the meal per person. Speaker 2 And they make it look really nice, too. They decorate it according to whatever’s going on. Birthday, anniversary, it’s nice. Speaker 1 I’m sorry. I’m a little beside myself right now. No, I mean it because it sounds appealing to me. Speaker 1 I’m not even qualified to be a resident there, but it sounds really good. So you’re obviously, I mean, with all these individual special diets, I mean, that’s got to pose a challenge. You’ve got to have to have a staff that, although after a while, I would imagine, oh, yes, Rosemary has this diet. Speaker 1 So you already, just by memory, you must know. Speaker 3 You really get to learn to know your residents. It’s when new people come in that we really have to be on our game. Speaker 2 And they have the pictures up in the back room in the dining area where their prep room. They have like the picture of the person and their diet. So for new people, they’re able to figure that out. So they’re not left to chance. Speaker 1 No kidding. Is it true that as we age, we have less taste buds and it’s more difficult to detect bitterness, for example? You know, like spices like salt. How do you address this for your residents? First of all, is there any truth to that? Speaker 3 there’s a little bit of truth to that um but at the but at the same time the marinade really helps when we pre-marinate food and we cook with a lot of wine so i mean i think i think skip the salt maybe a little wine marinade lemon juice wine marinated garlic it really intensifies the flavor we haven’t had many complaints on that it’s more temperature they want stuff really hot like when it’s soup they want it you know 195 degrees where it’s burning your mouth i mean and It’s more temperature. They want it super hot. And we do that for our residents. Speaker 1 What would you say is your most popular item on the menu? Speaker 3 We sell a lot of salmon. I got to say, we sell a lot of salmon. We probably go through about 120 pounds a week with salmon. Speaker 2 And people rave about it. When I have guests come in, they say, oh, I ordered the salmon, and they just rave about it. Speaker 3 It’s really healthy. I mean, it’s supposed to actually enhance brain function. with omega-3 fatty acid that’s in salmon. From what I was reading, at least, it’s supposed to really help their brain function and memory. Speaker 2 I’m living proof, right? I’m very smart. Speaker 3 Are you kidding me? Speaker 2 You’re the most intelligent. It’s all the salmon. It’s the salmon. All right, I’m sold on it. Speaker 1 I’m sold. When I come, I’m having the salmon. Speaker 3 You also do the little fancy things like that with quinoa salad. Oh, quinoa. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 3 Yeah, that they really love. Speaker 2 The fish. Yeah. Yeah, the sides change too, and they’re good. Speaker 2 They have like all sorts of vegetables. What was the thing you had the other day? I’m trying to think of what it was. Speaker 2 We couldn’t pronounce it. No, we couldn’t pronounce it. It was a side. Speaker 2 Farrow and eggplant. Something. Yeah, yeah. Speaker 2 We couldn’t pronounce it. It’s one of the ancient grains. It’s different. Speaker 2 It’s unique. The menu’s not your typical, just basic stuff. It’s not like chicken and potatoes. Speaker 2 It’s, yeah. Tim, tell me a little bit about your background. Speaker 3 Sure. Originally a culinary graduate. I went to Connecticut Culinary Institute about 25 years ago. I’ve been in the business for years. Several four-star restaurants I’ve worked in. Speaker 2 I call them a master chef, like on Food Network. Oh, yeah. Remember that? Speaker 1 I used to watch that show, yeah. Speaker 3 Is that still on anymore? Speaker 2 Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Speaker 3 I love cooking. I’ve been doing it most of my life. I’ve been involved in the restaurant industry for years. Speaker 1 What would you say your signature dishes? Okay, let’s go back to master chef. If you had one opportunity, you have to make one dish to be judged on, what would that be? Speaker 3 That’s a good question. There’s so many. Speaker 1 I know. Kind of an unfair question. Speaker 3 But we all have our one. Come on. That’s a tough question. Speaker 1 Ryan, you know what mine would be? The Gary Burger. Speaker 3 We can’t tell anyone about that. Speaker 1 No, it’s a secret recipe. Speaker 3 That’s right. If I put you on the spot I make some really nice veal dishes Like a veal salt and bokeh I make it really nice Which is good We’ve had on the menu Because we’ve had international day here And we kind of travel around the world Let’s go there Speaker 1 Alright, so when you have international day Is it one day a week? This Thursday is Mexican day The following Thursday is Chinese day Or Italian day I’m just trying to go through all the different types of I mean, there’s no end. Polish food, German food, blah, blah, blah. Speaker 3 Well, unfortunately, due to the pandemic and COVID, we’ve had to put it on hold for a little while. But our plan is to get that going again. We’ve gone partway around the world already, you know, with International Day. Speaker 3 But because of COVID, we’ve slowed it down. We have a live band in. So if it’s Italian, we’ll have an Italian band in. Speaker 3 We’ve had a barachi band. Speaker 1 Oh, Marriachi Bain for Mexican, sure. Speaker 3 Absolutely. Speaker 1 Where do you get your inspiration for your dishes that, you know, you talk about salmons, you talk about the steaks that you have and the marinades with wines and so on and so forth, because you’ve got challenges that, let’s say, the average restaurant may not have as much. Where do you draw upon, and with your creativity, by saying, I want to introduce something new to the menu. Speaker 3 Yep. Speaker 1 And do you, like, let me just give you an example. Sure. And you tell me if this even makes sense to you. Speaker 1 You’re on vacation. You’re with your family. You go to some off-the-beaten path where the natives go, not where the tourists go. Speaker 1 That’s where you go. You don’t go to the tourist traps. You go, where do the natives go? Speaker 1 That’s where we’re going tonight. I learned that in Louisiana. Best food I’ve ever had. Speaker 1 It was in New Orleans. But it was not in the French Quarter. It’s off of where all the townies are. Speaker 1 Okay, so going back to this question I posed to you, do you sit there and go, Oh my goodness. This was incredible. I don’t know if it’s even appropriate. Speaker 1 Do you talk to the chef or do you just make mental notes or do you take out your notebook and write a couple things down and then play around with it when you get back home? Speaker 3 After tasting, I can really tell most of the ingredients that are in there. And then whether I tweak off of the recipe and add things and be like, you know what would be better if I had a little bit of this or that? I remember when I traveled to Laos. Speaker 3 My wife’s from Laos. And we got married there. Wow. Speaker 3 Several years, 10 years ago. And I remember learning some really nice family recipes that I’ve introduced to Avery Heights from Laos. Speaker 1 Interesting. Speaker 3 I know. Speaker 1 I’ve heard food from Laos. I don’t know. Speaker 3 It’s right next to Thailand. So it’s. Speaker 1 What kind of foods are popular there? Speaker 3 Geez. You know, there’s a really nice. Some of this. Speaker 3 Well, one of the marinades that I introduced to soups really popular. soup soup’s a popular dish over there but it’s all about the marinade and some of the street food that i tried over there it’s phenomenal um they marinate their steak or chicken or pork with lemongrass ginger garlic and hoisin sauce right maybe a little bit of oyster sauce it’s phenomenal so and that was kind of like a family recipe that i learned in laos And we’ve introduced that to Avery Heights. Fascinating. Speaker 3 My wife also makes killer spring rolls. I’ve actually introduced them here at Avery Heights before. Speaker 1 How long have you been with Avery Heights, by the way? Speaker 3 I’ve been there 10 years. Diner and director a little over a year now. Speaker 1 Hmm. Made any changes since you’ve taken the helm? Speaker 3 Several changes on the menu. You know, I’m constantly changing the six-week rotating menu. That’s good. A lot of that’s, whenever something comes to me, I mean, if I notice something’s not selling, I’ll change it. Speaker 2 Okay. Speaker 3 If I hear feedback, if I hear positive feedback, I’ll definitely keep it on the menu. We also have a resident food committee where residents’ voices really matter. So they tell me what they like. They tell me every once in a while, I guess, they tell me what they don’t like. It doesn’t happen that often, but, you know. Speaker 1 Do you think, do you believe certain foods enhance, let’s say, brain function, for example, and maybe increases mental functions? And are there specific foods that actually do this? Speaker 3 There are a few. There’s, you know, I can tell you a couple off of the top ten that enhance brain function. Actually, one of them that we have on our menu all the time is salmon. Speaker 3 It’s supposed to be the number one food to increase brain function, from my understanding. Because it contains omega-3 fatty acid that’s supposed to be great. I mean, it’s great for you, great for your brain, great for your memory. Speaker 3 There’s others. I mean, broccoli is actually supposed to be really good for your memory. I love broccoli. Speaker 3 So do I. Which is, you know, speaking about vegetables. Speaker 1 Probably one of my favorite vegetables. Asparagus. Speaker 2 I love asparagus. Speaker 1 Peas. And broccoli is probably my favorite, though. Speaker 2 Asparagus is tough to cook, too. Because you can overcook that. Speaker 1 I grill it. Like when I fire up the grill and I have asparagus. In fact, I usually have asparagus with salmon, come to think of it. Yeah, sure. Speaker 2 Yeah. I use the oven roasted, too. Yeah. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. And add a few spices. Yeah. Speaker 1 Maybe squeeze some lemons on that or something. I don’t know. Just, oh, my goodness. Speaker 1 This is a tough show to do because I’m I know, right? You didn’t hear my stomach growling, did you? I’m blaming it. Speaker 1 It’s thunder. It’s thunder, folks. Gary, there’s not a cloud in the sky. Speaker 1 It’s thunder, I said. Folks, you’re listening to Your Next Chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m with Tim, Tim Barber, Director of Dining Services over at Avery Heights. Speaker 1 I’m Gary Byron. No, this is, you know, next time you come here, though, you’re supposed to be bringing samples. Speaker 2 I know, I was thinking about that. Speaker 1 That’s the rule here. If we’re going to do a cooking show or a food show. Speaker 2 Yeah, he makes good cookies, though, too. Chocolate chip cookies. And scones, and scones. Oh, yeah. Speaker 3 Scones, too. Speaker 2 Yeah. They smelled amazing yesterday. We had a little social yesterday. Speaker 2 And I think they were cranberry and blueberry. And they smelled so good. Yeah. Speaker 2 Fresh. Like, really. Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 Blueberry scone, chocolate chip cookie, a cup of coffee. I don’t think it gets much better than that. How does meal planning differ for memory care and assisted living? Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, it’s really the same food that we’re giving. We have a health. Speaker 3 We have a healthy menu and people, residents of memory care, you know, they also want comfort food too. Sure. It’s really just the way we prepare the food, whether it’s chopped up a little bit more. Speaker 3 There’s a couple of residents in memory care where we need to puree the food. So the puree food, it’s regular food on the menu. It’s probably one of our specials that we have, like whether it’s, you know, maybe it’s a comfort food like shepherd’s pie or chicken marcella. Speaker 3 I mean, that’s what we’re going to puree for that resident. So it’s not like we’re giving them high-quality pureed food. Most of the time it’s just food that’s chopped. Speaker 3 We just really have to skip the bones. So we skip the bones or the bones are taken out. Speaker 2 And they bring it up like at the very last minute so that once it gets to memory care, it’s hot. And then they have a nice warming station at memory care too. So it’s not like they’re going to get, you know, it’s not sitting around. Speaker 2 It’s not crusting over. It’s fresh. Yeah. Speaker 1 You talk about this board, right? or is it committee? Speaker 2 The resident, yeah. Speaker 1 Board committee. What do you get out of that? What do they try to communicate to you? Speaker 3 It can really be anything. Like some residents are adamant about, like, let’s have more veggies, which we always have two choices of veggies on the menu where they’re like, hey, let’s try broccoli rada or something. Let’s put that on the menu. Speaker 3 Or they might say, I want to see more beets. Let’s do more roasted beets that we have on the menu quite often. They’re really just speaking their mind, letting us know what they would like to see more of what they would like us to try. Speaker 3 Or one resident might say, hey, you make chocolate chip cookies all the time. Let’s do some more oatmeal raisins. So they’ll say, all right, no problem. Speaker 3 We’ll put that on the menu next week or tomorrow. You know, it’s just, and we spend a good amount of time. It’s usually supposed to be about a half hour session. Speaker 3 It usually draws out to a little over an hour. And, you know, it’s great. And I really think it’s important, and their voices count. Speaker 1 Siobhan, I love hearing the fact that the residents have such a great input. Speaker 2 Yeah, and really in everything at the community. We have a resident council for, like, everything, the activities for, you know, everything that happens, improvements. We have welcoming committees. Speaker 2 The residents are so highly involved, and I think that’s what, you know, gives them purpose and makes them feel like it’s a family. It’s not just, oh, I live here in a community. It’s important. Speaker 2 So, yeah, they have a voice in everything, and they listen. That’s what I like about Tim. He actually sits there with his notepad. Speaker 2 I’ve seen him with his notepad in the meeting, you know, really listening to. Speaker 1 Well, I’m sure it’s all constructive. I mean, you’re just trying to make it better. Speaker 3 Yeah, we take notes and then, you know, we talk about next time we meet, what we fixed, and if there’s anything that we haven’t, I’ll kind of give him a time frame when we are going to fix it. Speaker 2 And it’s a good dessert menu too. Like yesterday, I remember sitting there and they had like four or five desserts they listed off and ice cream. So it’s not like it’s sometimes you get that, you know, one dessert, sugar-free jello and, you know, sherbet. It’s good. Speaker 3 The toast ramen cake’s really popular. Speaker 2 They had lemon meringue yesterday. All right, all right. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. You talked about that community room and around holidays and sometimes. Do you have any, like, are there special functions that Avery Heights does that residents are included? Like, for example. Speaker 3 Absolutely. We have a special resident birthday where there’s, you know, all the birthdays through the month. They’ve got a separate table set up in the dining room. Speaker 3 Separate menu than our menu of the day. Big cake. Special menu. Speaker 3 Really? Big cake and wine, beers offered. Speaker 2 Everyone sings. It’s in the menu. Tell them about the menu. Stuffed shrimp. What? Speaker 3 I mean, sometimes we do stuffed shrimp or, I mean, we’ve done lobster tails. Speaker 2 Steak, lobster tails. Yeah. Speaker 3 Lobster tail. Speaker 2 Yeah, for the birthdays. Speaker 3 And seared scallops. Speaker 2 By the way, my birthday is on Thursday. Just saying. Mine’s not until March. Speaker 3 Whatever that means. One of the functions. Birthdays, I mean, the happy hour in the dining room. I mean, all holidays are a special menu. Speaker 2 They do the barbecue for the cottagers, which they add pulled pork and, yeah, hamburgers. Speaker 3 That particular function we have tomorrow. Speaker 2 And it’s huge. It’s packed. And the staff comes, too. Yeah, and the staff is invited as well, and corn on the cob, and all sorts, a huge dessert table. Speaker 1 This sounds like a social event. It’s not just a meal. Speaker 2 And it’s nice because the staff is invited, and so everyone gets to kind of mingle and associate together. Speaker 1 So how do you facilitate this experience? Like what are some of the best practices in place to ensure that, let’s say, all the residents are able to socialize and enjoy each other’s company? Sure. That’s what these kind of functions are good for, right, when you get everybody together? Speaker 3 Absolutely. It’s all about social. Yeah, because it’s not just the food. Speaker 3 I mean, the food’s important. I got you. But for the residents, like it’s coming to the dining room or some of these special events. Speaker 3 It’s it’s like the thing they look forward to. It’s the you know, probably the best part of the day to meet new people, socialize and. Speaker 1 This is a difficult show for me to do. I don’t know if you could tell this, but it’s so difficult to talk about. We’re not just talking about food. Speaker 1 I mean, the way you’re articulating all this. Yeah. The descriptions that you have is just. Speaker 1 It’s just… Butterfingers. Speaking of foods here, right? Speaker 1 No, Siobhan, we’ve got to wrap the show up, though, Siobhan. I mean, I could understand clearly now why you are always talking about the food. It always comes back to the food. Speaker 1 Before I do wrap it up, though, when you are initially talking with somebody, how often does food even come up? All the time. I mean, they want to talk about care, especially memory care and medications. Speaker 1 And I want to make sure mom socializes. She’s not just some hermit. in her own room food is a great way we’re just mentioning this it’s a great way to bring people together but how often does the topic of diet in does that even come up nutrition all the time Speaker 2 yeah because a lot of times older adults are sitting at home and they’re eating tv dinners or canned soup and that’s a huge thing that’s that’s one of yeah it’s socialization and they’re not Speaker 3 eating properly all our soups are homemade by the way we make all of them in-house i knew that no i You didn’t have to say that. Speaker 1 You knew that. Yeah. Well, yeah. Speaker 1 I mean, it becomes a can. I mean, that’s all sodium in a can. Yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heist. For more information on today’s topic, the dining experience, please call 866-537-1444. Speaker 1 Let me repeat that. I’ll slow it down. Write it down. Speaker 1 It’s 866-537-1444. In fact, the first three callers right now will be invited to an exclusive dining experience happening Sunday. It’s Sunday brunch at Avery Heights. Speaker 1 Look at that. I hear that that’s actually quite a shindig that you have there. It’s hard to get a seat there. Speaker 1 But if you’re just one of the first three callers, you’ll get a seat there. Speaker 2 And you can bring a guest. Speaker 1 Look at that. A guest, really? I would say call now. Speaker 1 866-537-1444. Call right now. Siobhan, great show. Speaker 1 Yeah. It really was. Folks, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Until next Saturday morning, thanks so much for listening to your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. Have a good one, everybody. So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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In this episode we learn about Mom’s House and how they can help from Co-Founder, Ben Raos. Learn More: [momshouse.com](http://momshouse.com/) ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut, and it’s never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Now, your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way that we think about aging, senior living, and the retirement years, along with the Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Great to see you this morning, Siobhan. Speaker 2 Good to see you. How are you? I’m good. I’m always nervous now by saying I’m good because I’m always, I feel good. Speaker 1 Well, that’s good. I’m not going to be honest. Speaker 2 I think it’s because I’m here. I think it’s because I’m here. It’s the environment. It’s the aura. Speaker 1 You are very comfortable in here. Speaker 2 I am. I know. As you should be. Speaker 2 So I’m always like when you say I’m failing. I feel awesome. But then you guys make fun of me. Speaker 2 I know. You do. In a kind way. Speaker 2 You do. Kind of a boy. Jimmy doesn’t. You do. Speaker 1 Oh, sure. Throw me under the bus. Speaker 2 Well, he’s going to be a superstar. Speaker 1 I only tease. You know, I only tease the ones I really like, by the way. Speaker 2 Oh, okay. All right. Speaker 1 If I didn’t like, I wouldn’t be teasing. Speaker 2 I’m the same way. I don’t tease people. I don’t. Speaker 1 No. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Because you don’t know how they’re going to take it. But if I’m teasing you, I’m comfortable with Speaker 2 Well, sometimes people can be very bland, too. Speaker 1 Well, in radio, that doesn’t work. Don’t be. Please, for the love of God, the worst thing that you can do is be bland. Speaker 1 I know. You know. I know. Speaker 2 How was your week? My week was good. What’s new at the Heights? Speaker 2 We are going to be starting our garden club back up. Well, tis the season for that, huh? Yeah, we have a new resident. Speaker 2 Her dad’s about to move in, and she has her own landscape design company. And so she’s amazing. She’s very, like, I want to say eco-friendly. Speaker 2 Eco-friendly, that’s what it would be. She’s very into the environment. And so she is actually going to be starting our garden club. Speaker 1 We were really excited. Like tomatoes? Cucumbers? Speaker 2 I don’t know. Actually, I don’t know because we are actually having a committee. We actually – she found this wonderful woman, actually a friend of hers, that used to have her own nursery in the area. Speaker 2 She just retired. She’s very excited as well. And so we don’t know. Speaker 2 The committee is going to decide if they want to do vegetables, if they want to do flowers. We’re probably going to start it in the fall. So I would say this year we’re probably not going to be vegetable focused, probably more like herbs and maybe like flowers. Speaker 2 And then next year. So they’ll figure out what they want to do. We want this to be totally the residents and this lady kind of like running it. Speaker 1 Can you do both? Can you just portion? I’m sure. This is flowers. Speaker 2 I’m sure. But I don’t know any vegetables that you start growing in the fall. Are there? Yeah. Speaker 1 No, you need a little sunlight. Speaker 2 Right. And lots of it. So that’s what I was saying. Speaker 2 This year we’re probably going to do herbs and flowers. And then next year we’ll see what they want to do. But yeah, what’s nice about it is that Tim will use it for the dining room as well. Speaker 1 Oh, using what you grow. Speaker 2 Homegrown. Yeah. Speaker 1 Like it. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s going to be good. Because our memory care right now has two raised gardens. Speaker 2 And so they do a lot of like tomatoes and stuff like that and, you know, cilantro and all that stuff. And he uses that stuff as well as for the cooking demonstrations for our memory care also. And so this will be, you know, probably more so because we have a nice little acre. Speaker 2 actually by the Adams Room where you guys were, there’s like a huge portion of land. And she’s like, well, you can repurpose this rather than mowing it and use it for the garden club. So it’s going to be fun. Speaker 2 When is this? It’ll start in the fall. Fall, okay. Speaker 2 But the meetings are ongoing right now. They’ll start now, yes. Because in the fall, you know, we want to have time to kick it off. Speaker 2 And in the summers, really, you know, July, August is really night, probably a good time, especially with this heat we’re getting. Speaker 1 Yeah, but it’s growing. It’s the growing season right now. Speaker 2 Yes, but I don’t think we’ll be able to get it We have to like build as well. They want to build some raised gardens for people who can’t be hunched over. They want to have. Speaker 2 So it’s a lot. And we want to kind of name it. Oops, sorry. Speaker 2 Name it as I’m beating the place up. Yeah. So it’ll be cool. Speaker 2 I want to name it like a really cool name. Speaker 1 Give me an example. What would be a really cool name? Speaker 2 I don’t know. I don’t know. Like I used to read my son this book. Speaker 2 And what was that garden called? Peaceful Garden or something. That’s not really like a great name. Speaker 2 But it’s just some kind of name. But I think the name we’re going to come up with it as we move through the process. Do you know what I mean? Speaker 2 It’s almost like naming your dog. You don’t want to name your dog right away because you want to see the personality. Do you have a green thumb? Speaker 2 I do not. My husband does. My husband is actually, we went to Lowe’s yesterday and I’m so excited. Speaker 2 We got watermelon and tomatoes and peppers and lettuce and stuff like that. So I just pick things out and then he grows it. During COVID we started. Speaker 2 And it’s so funny because he’s like, you don’t do anything with the garden. That was the first two years. And then I was just like, let’s have some acceptance here. Speaker 2 You know what? It’s like, you know, it’s not my thing. Speaker 1 Some of these things, like you mentioned watermelon, I know pumpkins, they take a while to grow. Speaker 2 Yeah, which is fine. Yeah, yeah. We’re excited, though. Speaker 1 Yeah, you should be. Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s fun to grow stuff. I mean, he grows it, but it’s just, you know, I take credit for it. Speaker 1 They do all the work, but you don’t take the credit for it. Like the little man, right? I’m on to you here. Our guest this morning, actually, if the name sounds familiar, is because we had him on about a month or so ago. Speaker 2 This is our second repeat guest, so we’re moving along with this podcast. Speaker 1 So that means he made the cut. He did. He did. Speaker 1 From Mom’s house. He’s the co-founder. Let’s bring him back on. Speaker 1 Ben Rayo. Ben, good morning. Speaker 3 Good morning. Good morning, guys. Good to talk to you again. Speaker 1 Yes. It seems like you were on, I don’t know, four or six weeks ago. A month or a month and a half ago. Speaker 1 It wasn’t that long ago. Yep. So you were talking about paying for long-term care. Speaker 1 So it’s great to have you back. Today we’re going to talk about your company that is one of the solutions for folks to help pay for that long-term care. We’re talking about Mom’s House. Speaker 1 Mom’s House. Yeah. For those who couldn’t catch the first time that you were with us, what is Mom’s House and what services does your company provide? Speaker 3 Yeah, Gary. So, you know, it’s interesting. A lot of times families aren’t ready to have that conversation, and so it kind of thinks many times can happen quickly, and a loved one needs to move into a higher level of care, and they find out how much it’s going to cost, and they realize, oh, my gosh, this is, you know, everything is more than we expect it to be, right? Speaker 3 Always. It doesn’t matter whether we’re buying a hamburger at the grocery store or a car, whatever it is, it’s always more. And so then when the family, the adult children, which we call daughter Judy, is that avatar is trying to figure out how are we going to take care of mom and make sure she gets the greatest level of care. Many times they find out the house is their biggest asset. Speaker 3 Many times it’s their forever home. We know men typically pass away before women do. So mom’s been living in the house trying to keep it going and something’s happened, an event or something, and the decision to be moved into care. So the house needs to be sold. Many times it’s grandma clean. It’s got the avocado appliances. Everything’s in perfect condition, but it’s not updated. Speaker 3 And so what we do at Mom’s House is we actually, all over the country, we come in and provide services to families that have a senior transitioning into care. And that first service that we provide is coming in to buy the house. And so we come out and buy it. We’re not real estate agents. Speaker 3 We’re not coming out to say, hey, clean it out, fix it up, do these to get top dollar. We’re going to just come in and buy it. And we can buy it in a couple different ways. We can come in and buy it as is, meaning you want to leave all the stuff behind. Maybe the basement is flooded. Mom’s not been downstairs in two years, so you can realize it. And so there’s a big mess there. A lot of extra stuff left around the house needs to be updated. So for us to come in and just buy it kind of as is and leaving any of the stuff that you don’t want, the family comes and gets the heirlooms, they get the stuff’s important. Now, if there’s a lot of valuable stuff, we’ve got resource partners that can come in to help with liquidation and selling the stuff and helping you pack up and move it. But we’re really there to buy the house. So one would be kind of what I just described. Speaker 3 The other option, which a lot of people don’t understand, is we have the ability to come in and buy the house and let the family stay. So maybe this is more of a planning situation where they’re waiting for a villa or an apartment to open up an independent living. We can go ahead and buy the house, unlock the equity. The family gets their money, but mom can stick around for some number of months while she waits for her place to be ready. Speaker 1 So it’s like a month to month, a month to month. Speaker 3 Yeah. Sometimes, you know, as new independent living places are opening up or being built, it may be four months before the apartment’s going to be ready. And so they can stay there for those four months. Speaker 3 Or if it’s a new build, maybe it’s going to be six months. But whatever it is, we’re fine to do that and let mom stay there in her forever home so she doesn’t have to move twice. Then the last one, which is really interesting, is the ability to give somebody an above-market offer. Speaker 3 And people are like, what does that mean? You’re going to pay me more than my house is worth? Speaker 1 People are doing it every day right now with the bidding on the low inventory of homes, right? I’m seeing that happen all the time. Speaker 3 It is still kind of hot for real estate, but we’ve had some of the biggest drops in real estate in days on market since like 2015. So things have slowed down, interest rates, inflation, people being more cautious. You know, it’s interesting. Speaker 3 It’s costing people anywhere from $300 to $500 more per month for a mortgage payment just because the interest rate changes. And that adds up to be a lot. But that above-market offer is something we can do with a family. Speaker 3 Maybe they don’t need the money right away, and they’d rather have it be more of an investment. So we can pay them more and close right away, and they would be holding back some kind of note on the property for a short period of time, giving the family an opportunity to maybe earn some interest, increase the value while getting a higher offer. So we’re really going to meet the family at their level. Speaker 3 What they need, what does the family need? Is it crisis and they need it right away? We’ve bought a house in as quickly as eight days for somebody that was bedridden, that didn’t have any family locally. Speaker 3 We’ve done it where we’ve closed on a house and somebody stayed in the house for six to eight months after the closing. So it really just depends on what the family needs. We’re there to buy the house, and we focus only in the senior living industry. Speaker 3 That’s really our focus. Right. It’s all over the country. Speaker 1 Walk me through this process. What’s the first step that people need to do? Speaker 3 So usually we’re getting introduced through a senior living care community that’s introducing the family to us, a placement agent, elder law attorney, somebody that’s a professional that’s in the senior living industry saying, hey, you need help with the house. They get introduced to us, or they come to momshouse.com and show out a form online and say, I’d like to get an offer for my house. After that, we’re going to assign that family to somebody that’s going to be a local senior transition specialist. Speaker 3 That’s somebody that’s trained in what’s going on in senior living, and they’re out there to come meet with the family and see what the family needs and other resources they might have. I know you’ve had some guests on your shows that we have relationships with. Those would be people we might refer a family to that need those other services. Speaker 3 So we’re going to come out. We’re going to walk through the house, sit down and understand what’s really going on, timelines, and then we’re going to give them a written offer to buy the house. They would say if they want to take that offer, they sign it, and whatever the closing date is. Speaker 3 We’re closing it. It’s going through a regular title company. It’s just like if you were buying a house any other way, and then the funds get wired right to the family’s bank account. Speaker 3 And so there’s a title company that’s in between all of that to make sure it all happens and all the titles are clear and all those things happen. And, you know, you can just watch the stress melt off of adult children because many of them are living in other cities where mom doesn’t live. And so they’re trying to figure out what are we going to do with all this stuff in the house and we’ve got to get it ready to get it on the market and the agent’s saying clean it up, fix it up to get top dollar. Speaker 3 I don’t want to take on a rehab project. If the three of us are brothers and sisters, a mom lives in Cincinnati, Ohio, which one of us is going to go to the house to help clean it out and we’re going to hire contractors to fix it up to get top dollar? The family ends up at the same place with us that they could end up after going through all that effort. Speaker 1 What’s the home buyer network? Speaker 3 That’s our network of transition specialists. So we’ve got almost 1,000 boots on the ground all over the country. Those are the people that are going out to go buy the houses. Speaker 3 Your market is very different than Kansas City where I live or my mom’s in Louisville or family in Chicago. All of those markets are all different. And so having people in those local markets helped to make it to where we can make the best offer to the family, just understanding that a house on this side of the street versus that side of the street is very different. Speaker 3 So that’s what we do all over the country. Speaker 1 What’s the cost? There’s got to be a cost to use these services. Speaker 3 Oh, my gosh. The cost. Nothing. Speaker 3 There is no cost. That’s the greatest part about this whole thing. It’s such a win-win between the senior living care communities, mom’s house, and the family. Speaker 3 We make money on the real estate, so there’s no charges. There’s no commissions. There’s no fees. Speaker 3 None of that happens this way. This is where the family doesn’t really understand the details of where they think, oh, if I lift it, which is what everybody’s always done forever, right, and you pay 6% or 7% commissions and closing costs, and then you spend some money to fix it up. By the time you water all that and take it all down out of all of the other options, you’re going to end up at about the same place with a mom’s house offer than you would going through the traditional route. Speaker 1 All right. You take the home as is. I mean, you must have seen the creme de la creme of beauty, and you must have seen the opposite side of that spectrum as well, where there may have been hoarding and disarray and neglect. Do you take the home as is, or what’s your protocol? Speaker 3 We do. So, Gary, you know what you call a hoarder that you like? An aggressive collector. Speaker 3 We have lots of aggressive collectors out there. People, you know, you’ve got the people that are, you’ve got people that are actually hoarders and it’s filled with stuff and trash. And we’ve had it where we’ve had 10, 10, 15 dumpsters full of stuff. Speaker 3 There’s so much stuff. You don’t think about the volume when you’re going up into a, you know, upward with the collections. But we know families have heirlooms and they have all the salt and pepper shakers and, you know, those kinds of things aren’t hoarders. Speaker 1 Well, I don’t mean that stuff. I don’t mean the family heirlooms. I mean, TV guides from when Lucy was on the cover. Speaker 3 Yeah, that’s right. And so that’s part of what we offer and evaluate to the families is to not have to deal with the stuff. The stuff is almost as stressful as the house because the adult children don’t want it, right? Speaker 3 They want three or four pieces, each of us. They just want a few things from our childhood, from our parents, some photos, some other things. But then there’s a lot of other stuff that, and none of our stuff has as much value as we think it does. Speaker 3 But you know what? There’s some great stuff out there that families don’t realize have value. And so we partner with companies like a Caring Transitions or other companies that are focused in the senior living industry that can come and help evaluate what they have or clean out or do those things. Speaker 3 It just kind of depends. And we’ve also had houses, Gary, that need zero work. They’re in perfect condition. Speaker 3 You can put a sign in the yard, they sell it. And the family just doesn’t want to deal with it. They’re trying to work on getting their family member, loved one into senior living. Speaker 3 And they don’t want to deal with getting it ready and doing any of the things they need to do. They just want to get a solution taken care of and focus on mom. Some people value time over money. Speaker 3 I actually can understand that, though. I get it. Speaker 2 I think that’s the best part of your company is that you take the house as is. It really is. I mean, I know so many people that are just, especially the adult children, are just simply overwhelmed by the amount of stuff that’s in the house. Speaker 2 And when I, you know, refer your company, they’re like, oh, they take it as is. And you’re right. After you water everything, after you’re improving it and doing this and doing that and all the work and the time, time is money too. Speaker 2 It just makes more sense to go this route. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. She is the senior living specialist. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning is the co-founder of Mom’s House, which you can find online at momshouse.com, Ben Rayo. Ben, is this service available throughout the entire United States, or is this more concentrated in certain cities? Speaker 3 No, we do this all over the country. You know, it’s funny. people that live in markets like, you know, New York or San Francisco or San Diego or even where you guys are, you know, houses are much more expensive. A house that’s a $400,000 house in the Midwest is a million dollar house in those other cities or more. And it still works there. Speaker 3 It’s the same thing. It just scales. So we’re all over the country. You know, we’d love to help any families that are looking at it. The best thing is that there’s no obligation. Speaker 3 It’s just another option. And if you don’t like this option, you can go the traditional route and, you know, fix it up and get it ready to put it on the market. But many times the family wants an easy button. Speaker 3 And, you know, we’re sensitized to what’s going on during that transitional period for a loved one going into senior living or higher level of care. And so we’re just here as a resource and see us as another option. Speaker 1 Generally speaking, how long does it take for a person to get the funds? Speaker 3 So it really, we leave that up to the family. That’s up to the family as far as, you know, how big of a hurry they’re in. Many times they’re ready to get it done, and that’s a big relief. Speaker 3 But they’re like, ah, can we get an extra three weeks because we need to do this? Or we’ve got some things they’re trying to get tied up from our family. So, again, we’ve closed in 10 days when it was an emergency. Speaker 3 And we’ve gone, you know, months. But generally, it’s three to four weeks to kind of get it all done under contract and closed. The money gets wired instantly. Speaker 3 As soon as we sign the paperwork and we go to closing, we take a closing date, whatever date that is, three weeks from now, four weeks from now, the day we sign the paperwork and close, the funds are electronically wired to the family. Speaker 1 I would imagine, as I’m listening to you, that there’s several advantages of using mom’s house as opposed to doing this on your own. Speaker 3 Absolutely. I mean, it’s because we are senior centric, you know, knowing all the pieces. If we if we see a folded up flag on a shelf, we’re certainly going to ask that family member if they were a veteran, served in an active war or if their spouse that passed away maybe years ago did. Speaker 3 A lot of people don’t know about VA aid and attendance, which is money available for veterans that served in an active war, but also available to the spouse. And the spouse doesn’t even know to ask that. So, you know, being sensitized and understanding what all the different components are there. Speaker 3 You know, sometimes we’ve got to get stuff because the houses, we want to make sure that we’re not going to disrupt Medicaid or something. Or there’s other things that are going on there. You know, if they have a long-term insurance policy for care, you know, that’s something that there’s resources we would refer them to for that long-term care insurance policy reviews and things like that. Speaker 3 So you’re not going to find people in the real estate market that understand all those different pieces and parts. And so we don’t charge anything for those things. Those are just us referring families to other people that we know, like, and trust. Speaker 1 What ends up happening to the house? Speaker 3 that you purchase? What do you do with it? So it just depends on the house and where it is. We could fix it up to flip it. You see the shows that they show you how easy it is to fix a house in 30 minutes. And, you know, if you’ve ever done any rehab to your house or you’ve ever taken on any kind of a project that never gets done on time or on budget, that’s the naivety that people think that, oh, we’re going to be able to get this done. You know, it’s tough to find a good contractor. Speaker 3 So all these things go into that decision-making process of, do I want to hit the easy button and end up at about the same place that I could, or do I want to go down the path that could take months? And taking those months, Siobhan, you said this earlier, time is expensive too. Well, it’s not just the time to get mom into care, but it’s also the time of insurance, taxes, maybe a mortgage payment, utilities, other things that are involved that the families aren’t thinking about that adds up that they’re really spending more money than they realize. Speaker 3 Yeah. Speaker 1 Did you, I mean, you run into that problem a lot? Speaker 2 With the, oh, definitely. I think it’s very stressful for families. I think the main thing, like I said, is when people have to clean up the house, especially if mom was a hoarder. Speaker 2 I mean, and especially, you know, again, people have been in the houses like 50, 60, 70 years. There’s a lot of stuff. I mean, I’m sitting here thinking about my house and I’m thinking about, oh my gosh, just the basement alone. Speaker 2 But I’ve only been in my house maybe for 30 years. I mean, can you imagine? And then, like you said, the neglect as well. Speaker 2 You know, the stoves now, I’ve been in houses that, you know, like you were talking about TV guides, like newspapers just like up to the ceiling. Oh, yeah. So have I. You know, and one guy. Speaker 3 20 years of TV guide, right? Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. 20 years. Broken stuff. Speaker 2 People keep broken. I think it’s that generation of, you know, lack of. It’s like, you know, what if I need that? Speaker 2 And it’s a broken whatever it may be, VCR. are, but it’s that feeling of like, well, maybe, you know, we can get that fixed. And you know, it’s that, what if I need that? My mom was like that, that what if we need that? And she’s got, it runs in my head, that tape sometimes when I’m about to throw something away. And I was like, I don’t need a broken hanger, you know, but it’s like that feeling of like, well, I could put some duct tape on it. What if I ever need that? And then sure enough, there are always that times that you actually need that thing. And then, you know, psychologically, like, wait, I do need it. Speaker 1 I think that’s generational though. I do. These are people coming out of the depression. Speaker 2 Exactly. The lack of. Yeah. Speaker 2 When you have lack of. And actually not even that. It’s just like if you were, you know, my family wasn’t, you know, affluent. Speaker 2 So it’s like that lack of, you know, not having. And so you hold on to everything that you can get your hands on. Speaker 1 Although I got to say, I’m not from that generation, but I sit there and go, oh man, I used to have one of those. No, I could use that right now. Speaker 2 Right? And you get frustrated. Speaker 1 I gave it away. What’s his number? I’m going to get that back. Speaker 1 Right? Yeah. I bet he doesn’t even use it. Speaker 2 The broken weed whacker is like, why do you need that? You find out he threw it away. Exactly. You don’t need it. Just in case. Speaker 3 Or Dad. Mom was a survivor, but Dad had all those tools and all the collections of all the stuff you’re describing, right? And so we have a whole garage and shed full of stuff that she has no idea if it has any value. Dad had six weed whackers in there that he was going to fix. Speaker 2 Exactly. None of them work. Yeah, and cover the Porsche, right? Speaker 3 Or we paid $100 for that VCR. I can’t throw that away or donate it. Yeah, VCR. It’s not worth $3. Speaker 1 There’s not even tapes to play in the VCR. Oh, my goodness. Speaker 2 The books, too. There’s always, like for me, like I read a book, I try to pass it on or donate it. But people hold on to their books and puzzles. Speaker 2 Puzzles and books. There’s piles. People always want to donate. Speaker 2 Although I revisit books. Speaker 1 Those are books I read several years ago. Speaker 2 If I like the book, but if it’s like a one, you know what I mean? If it was okay, you give it away. But if it’s a book, you’re right. It was a book that you really liked. Speaker 1 There’s a few books I’ve read a couple times. Speaker 2 Like the Rob Lowe biographies. Speaker 1 I’ve never read the Rob Lowe. Speaker 2 The autobiography, yeah. Speaker 1 I never read a Rob Lowe’s autobiography. Speaker 2 It was good, actually. Speaker 1 I bet he lived a crazy life. Speaker 2 Yeah. I shouldn’t say lived. He’s not even that old of a guy, is he? He’s not, but it’s amazing if you read the books, like the life that he lived. Like he’s in recovery and all that stuff. Speaker 1 That I knew. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah. Things you find. Speaker 2 But we digress. There’s always time to talk about Rob Lowe. Sorry, Ben. Speaker 1 A little crush on a little bit? Just a tad. Just a little bit. Speaker 1 This is why we love you. It really is. You’re so revealing. Speaker 1 It makes great radio. It really is. Candid as you are. Speaker 1 I’m sorry, Ben. We’ve kind of gotten off the track. He’s 59 years old. Speaker 1 Is he really? Speaker 3 That’s okay. I was looking at her affection to Rob Lowe, and I was like, okay. Speaker 1 This guy’s pushing 60. He looks better than I do. He does. Speaker 1 Good God. Yeah, the money helps. And the Atkins diet. Speaker 1 Oh, that’s right. He pushes that, doesn’t he? Speaker 2 Yeah. We can go grab rabbit holes. Let’s get back to Ben. All right. Speaker 1 Let’s go back to Ben. Speaker 2 Ben. Speaker 1 Back to Ben. Speaker 2 Go ahead. Speaker 1 Whatever you were saying. Speaker 2 Did you sell Robbo’s house? No. Go ahead. Speaker 3 No, but we bought it. Speaker 1 Are there any houses, though, that you’ve refused or doesn’t fit your criteria? Good question. Speaker 3 No, not really. Not really. It’s more about, you know, that it would be more that the offer that the family wanted to explore other options. Speaker 3 We’re always going to be able to do something in some kind of a market. I mean, it can get challenging. You get into some city that the population of the city is 500, and it’s three hours from any major metropolitan area. Speaker 3 And, you know, as far as, you know, values of houses and what you can do with it, and, you know, there’s some limitations there. We’re still going to try to help that family. And I’ll tell you what, if we can’t buy the house or they don’t want to take the offer, what I can promise is that we’re going to leave that family better than when we first met them. Speaker 3 Whether we’re giving them a copy of the Paying for Long-Term Care book or whether we’re giving them resources for veterans aid and tenants or long-term care insurance policy reviews or any of those kinds of things, we’re going to leave people better often when we met them. Speaker 1 And you know the value of the home. You know what to offer them, right? Sure, sure. Speaker 3 That’s part of having people all over the United States to really understand what the values are. I don’t know what the value of your house is where you live, Gary, and what the houses across the streets work, but somebody that lives in your area does. Speaker 1 Let me give the website once again. It’s MomsHouse.com, www.MomsHouse.com. And your phone number, do you want to reveal that? Speaker 3 Oh, my gosh. I don’t even know what our phone number is. Do we do that these days? Speaker 3 Okay. You’re going to make me go out to the house. I’m sorry. Speaker 3 That’s okay. I’m just going to go to the mom’s house. I don’t know what the phone number is. Speaker 1 Well, I’ll tell you what. It might be right on the website. Go to, and it’s really easy. Speaker 1 You don’t have to. It is. Momshouse.com. Speaker 3 816-744-0244. That’s 816-744-0244. Speaker 1 816-744-0244. I want to thank our guest this morning, the co-founder of Mom’s House, Ben Rayo. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living. Speaker 1 To learn more about Avery Heights, please contact Siobhan at 860-953-1201. That’s 860-953-1201. Or connect with her online at averyheights.org. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, Senior Living Specialist at the Heights, I’m Gary Byron. Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. 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She talks about Ageism and how her company is creating age positivity. [**More Information** ](https://agefriendlyvibes.com/) ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 So, welcome to your next chapter. We’re excited to be here this morning. My name is Saran Mattingly, and I am the Senior Living Specialist. Speaker 1 And today, I am joined by Jan. Jan, hello. She is the founder of Age Friendly Vibes, and we’re grateful to have you here this morning. Speaker 1 Hello. Speaker 2 Great. Thank you. Glad to be here. Thank you. Speaker 1 Yeah. So, tell us about yourself. Speaker 2 Well, I live in Denver, Colorado, and I’m a creative entrepreneur at this point in my career. I have been in the tech field. I was a web developer in the tech field for my entire career. Speaker 2 I still do that part-time. But in the past 10 years, I’ve been dabbling with side hustles, with creating training for iPhone users. And then most recently, I started a greeting card company that helps to promote age positivity. Speaker 1 Very nice. Tell me about that. Tell me about Age Friendly Vibes. I love the name, by the way. Speaker 2 Oh, great. Thank you. The idea is to just spread age positivity. Speaker 2 Age Friendly Vibes is a stationary brand that the purpose is to put age positive messages out there in the world. and especially for people when they’re celebrating their birthday. So it’s to counteract all of the over the hill and I call them the damn your old cards. Speaker 2 So I like to think of it as damn your hot as you get older instead of your old. So my purpose is just to counter all the negativity that’s out there, especially in the greeting card industry. Speaker 1 Yeah, especially at your birthday. What is that? Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 to a party with over the hill and you know tombstones and all that stuff it’s uh it’s Speaker 2 absolutely yeah exactly i don’t know who buys those cards that you know say things like you’re one year closer to the sweet release of death or it’s like happy birthday or you know you’ve got Speaker 1 old women and all those things it’s like it’s i you know someone who’s about you know 60 i think in was the two years I’ll be turning 60. I feel fantastic, by the way. I mean, right, exactly. Speaker 1 And so I don’t feel like, you know, I’m over the hill. I don’t feel like it’s time to go out to pasture. I don’t feel like it’s over. Yeah, exactly. Probably better now than I’ve ever felt. Speaker 2 Right. And that’s the big myth. That’s the big disconnect. And, you know, that making you feel bad about getting old is really just a way to get to sell products honestly to sell you know between skin creams and potions to make you have a youthful you know appearance women are disproportionately affected by ageism which is discrimination against a person simply because of their age. And by the way, it works both ways. So younger people can be victims of ageism as well. So when you make it about age, it’s ageism. But as older adults, we’re impacted by societal ageism in a culture, you know, that values youth, especially when we’re trying to seek employment or stay employed in our field. It’s really prevalent there. It’s also very prevalent in healthcare in the way that we’re treated as we get older by the healthcare professionals. Speaker 2 And most importantly, and the part that I’m the most passionate about is there’s some recent research out from Dr. Becca Levy, who’s a professor at Yale University that proves that people who feel old, who have self-deprecating humor about age, actually decrease their longevity by up to seven and a half years. So your mindset about aging actually shortens your lifespan by a significant amount. So that’s what I’m most passionate about is bringing awareness to people. Speaker 2 You know, when we go back to thinking about your birthday and your loved ones, it’s like, you’re literally killing them with messages about how, how terrible it is to be all night. And you may see it as well but especially when you get to be 50 or 60 you’ve got you maybe know some people or maybe you’re that way yourself but you blame age and stop you know participating in yes you Speaker 1 can’t do that yes yeah learning new things so that’s where ageism comes into play yeah and people tell you you’re too old for it too like yeah oh you know i’m gonna do this or that you know i’m like a little kid we went to the uh here in Connecticut we went to the yard goats game uh which is like a minor league baseball team and you know the mascot was there it’s it’s a goat they’re two goats it’s a girl and a guy and I ran over and my daughter hates this she was actually already in the seats so I got my picture taken I texted it to her she I knew she was she said my word I got that because you know I’m like a little kid when we went to Disney I mean when we saw Daisy and Donald and you know, Vampyra. And I’m telling you, I’m like a little kid. And I think I had the most kind of little kid fun at Disney than, than my family. Cause all the, my family members are in their teens or in terms of the kids are in their twenties. And, you know, my husband’s over 60. Speaker 1 So it’s kind of like, but I enjoyed myself. I was excited to see Snow White, Cinderella, Minnie Mouse. And, you know, I think you’re right. I think, you know, people tell you you’re, you know, act your age, you know, and all this stuff. Why, you know, as long as I’m not doing anything, you know, harmful emotionally to someone because I’m acting immaturely, I think that’s different than just being a kid, you know, running through a, you know, you know, after it rains in the summer, how much fun is that? You know, that’s, that’s not being immature. That’s just being a kid at heart. And you’re right. I’m sure that would add to your, to your lifespan as well as your quality Speaker 2 in life. Yeah, exactly. And I think we can all see people in our lives that have, are have lived a long time, and there’s, they’re healthy, and they’re vibrant, and they’ve lived a long, healthy, vibrant life. And one of the biggest things is, if you look back at those folks, most of the time, they’ve got a very positive outlook about age, you know, they, they look forward to getting older, they feel like it’s the best time of their life, they feel like they’re just getting started. So around how you feel about getting older, that has a huge impact on how we age. So that’s kind of the motivation behind my brand. And again, like you mentioned, especially when you’re celebrating a birthday, because it’s hard to not talk about age when you’re celebrating birthday, because that’s when you’re becoming a year older. And so it’s kind of an easy time to like, take a swing at somebody and make them feel bad about getting older. But my message is if you can actually either start a conversation about ageism or actually address age in a way that’s positive or gets somebody thinking, I think it’s an opportunity on their birthday to actually Speaker 1 kind of, you know, have a positive impact on them. So, well, it is a celebration. Yeah. It’s not a funeral. It’s not a memorial service, but a lot of times as you get older, that’s what you kind of feel. I was just thinking, as you were talking about back in the day, For some reason, I’m thinking of like the gladiator movie or, or any of those types of things where, you know, karate kid, where getting older, you know, it’s, you’re, it’s wisdom. Speaker 1 It’s like go to the older adults for wisdom. You know, even that movie with Mama Coco, it’s a cartoon, you know, you know, you know, it’s like when you’re older, you’re seen as someone, you know, you know, go to the sages, go to the mountains, or even the wizard of Oz, you know, older person. And for some reason, like you said, and I know you had written in your blog, like, you know, in America, it just seems as though, you know, getting old is like, you know, you just have to try to stay young. Speaker 1 As opposed to embracing age and embracing the beauty of that, you know, and just like I said, for me, getting older has been awesome. You know, the wisdom that I have and the calmness and the ability not to say everything that comes into my mind is amazing. And that comes with age. And so I think, you know, here at the community, we have several people who are in their 90s and over 100. Speaker 1 We have a gentleman that just moved in who wrote a book and he’s out there promoting it. know, and he was in World War II and it’s just like, you know, that’s the way it should be, you know, you know, we have people here that people always ask me, well, how old are the people there? You know, it’s a senior living community, but it’s like, you know, even though those, we do have people here who are younger in their, you know, fifties and sixties and so forth, but we have people in their sevens and eighties, nineties and a hundreds that are probably more vibrant than some of the people that are in their fifties and sixties. Sometimes, like you said, we give up it’s just like oh i’m too old for that or you know you know that’s for young people and you know as opposed to you know going forward and you know there was someone on um uh american ninja warriors now i’m disclosing my my little secrets of what i watch on tv but you know she was in her 70s and she made a record a world record you know that’s the first time they had someone that age Now, granted, she didn’t get past the first obstacle, but so what? Speaker 1 She still, you know, she showed up. She still, you know, she, you know, she still did her part. And it’s amazing to see that, you know, see someone in their 70s, you know, kind of trying to, you know, doing something, going for it for something that people as little as 10 years old are competing. Speaker 1 Right. Speaker 2 Exactly. Yeah. She just proves that your age doesn’t matter really. And when it comes to that, if you want to do something like that, you can certainly do it. So I agree. Speaker 1 And we always talk about, you know, our slogan is your next chapter. And, you know, I love that because we truly mean that, you know, you know, I come from the hospice world and, you know, I always talk to people, you know, now because I came from hospice and I have someone who has someone who’s passing away. I try to give them advice and I always tell them, you know, there’s quality death. Speaker 1 That’s part of your journey. Death doesn’t have to be, if, you know, if you have the opportunity and you’re, you know, death doesn’t have to be something horrible. It doesn’t have to be something ugly. Speaker 1 We, you know, in hospice, we always talked about a good death because, you know, that’s part of your journey. And if you’re still here and you’re in your nineties or a hundred, and maybe you can’t do all the things because maybe you do have some physical limitations that you were able to do. But if you’re still here and you have your mind and, you know, keep going, keep, keep finding ways to keep living. Speaker 1 And I love that what you’re doing is facilitating that. It’s inspirational. You know, we have our store here, which we were talking about offline. Speaker 1 And I definitely want to get your products in our store, you know. So when we’re getting birthday cards, we’re not giving the tombstone or the, what was it, the far side, you know. Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 Or the Grim Reaper. Yeah, exactly. I’m not there yet, you know. Speaker 1 And if I’m still here, then my journey is continuing. And I think that’s, you know, that’s kind of your kind of your message. I really were talking about your blog or the case for age, positivity, positivity and greeting cards. Speaker 1 And I think what you’re doing is is is definitely an amazing, an amazing thing. How can we be a part of the solution? I mean, I know I work here in a senior living community. Speaker 1 So, you know, I feel like I can do my part. But out there, you know, how can a young person or an old person or somewhere in the middle? you know what can I know you said the conversation but what else can we do to kind of yeah I think Speaker 2 healthy healthy right message you know well I think when we encounter first of all it’s being aware that ageism is harmful and especially when it comes to birthdays just stop with the can’t you take a joke or it’s just a joke because the thing about a birthday card on a greedy card shelf that is now declaring you old is that it’s not just an inside joke between you and your bestie. You know, you might think, oh, that’s funny. That’d be great for my sister or for my whatever, you know, that is a message about getting old is bad. That’s put out there into the universe that your potential hiring boss is seeing, you know, your potential medical professional, or more importantly, the marketing exec or people that create the content that just keeps perpetuating that message. So first of all, it’s just stop doing the you can’t take a joke as an excuse for that, that type of humor, and instead use it as an opportunity to basically say, actually, life gets better as you get older, and I’m enjoying the age that I am. And I think you should look forward to becoming older as well. I think that when you educate younger people about the harmful impacts of ageism they get it almost immediately you know they understand that and they they just say wow I had no idea you know because I thought it was funny or you know whatever to make fun of people that are getting older so I think it’s education and then speaking up when somebody either says something to you that’s ageist you know there’s a lot of comments that happen one of the most common ones is the you look great for your age oh my gosh it’s like you’re we’re Speaker 1 channeling each other that is exactly that was going to be my next comment yeah that is like Speaker 2 the worst thing that someone can say you know it’s yeah and one of the best one of the best all-time comebacks comes from ashton applewhite from this chair rocks and in her book she says to throw it back on the person and say well you look great for your age too you know but you can further, you know, go on to say, so what does this age look like? You know, so what, you know, then you could not be more different as a six-year-old. There’s so many life experiences, so many physical changes that happen in our bodies. There’s so many changes. So if you, they say, if you’ve seen one six-year-old, you’ve seen one six-year-old. If you think of like an 18 year old, most of them are in a similar phase in life. Most of them are, you know, in a physical, similar, like developmental cycle or whatnot. But so there, there’s just no way that people, you know, there, people treats people over 60 or over 50, all the same, but we couldn’t be more different. So I think that’s just the most important thing is a realization. And then secondly, is to just, you know, use it as a launching point for a conversation about how you feel about getting Speaker 1 yeah yeah I think you’re I think you’re right I think um you know educating um the younger generation so that when they get to be my age or what have you they don’t like you said that Speaker 2 getting older is a gift you know yeah exactly go through various cycles and it’s like and and I Speaker 1 like the idea like what we do here is we have a lot of volunteers for stuff like I have now like which I’m so excited I have one of the residents who’s volunteering to help me with the marketing there’s just so much knowledge there. And I think we leave that on the table and we don’t benefit from the knowledge of our older adults. Yeah, you know, sitting out here talking to, you know, asking advice. I used to years ago, I worked at a another community. I remember sitting outside and I was young, married, you know, and I used to ask the guys advice and they used to give me advice. And it was just, but it was great. It’s like, you know, they know they were married. They, They, you know, they know, they understand, you know, the mind of a man. Speaker 1 And it was great. It was like, this is this is my little, you know, my little group of mentors here. So it was it was good. And I, you know, took advantage of their age and their wisdom, you know, as opposed to as opposed to that. Speaker 1 What are your plans for your company going forward? Like, you know, are you going to I see, in my opinion, out there speaking engagements. I know you did some speaking at a conference recently for greeting cards. Speaker 1 I really think you need to get out there. Speaker 2 Yeah, so I really have a two-pronged approach to what I’m doing. And I am just getting started. My business is two years old. Speaker 2 I’ve gotten myself up to speed in the greeting card industry. I’ve got a lot of makers and peers of mine that I’ve been able to educate about ageism. and I’m starting to see other makers start to make more age positive cards and take down those cards that are offensive from an age perspective. So that’s very satisfying. I recently sold a card to Barnes and Noble and paper source. I can show you it’s this one that says age is just a number Speaker 1 of years you’ve been loved. So nice. Yeah. It’s in the Barnes and Noble and paper source across Speaker 2 the country. So in over 750 stores, so you should see more age positivity and you’re starting to see more age positivity on the shelf. There’s still ages cards making fun of getting older, but if you look, you can find cards that are a little, little bit more on the age positive side. So that’s pretty exciting. And I’ve also been working in the senior living communities. I do a series of like stickers and buttons that promote age positivity. Like this one says, love your future self. Nice. And that’s also been a really popular type of message to get out there. So that’s just reminding people that, you know, your future is, is bright, you know. And so I’ve been working on education and awareness within the senior living community and spaces. And as you know, there’s a lot, it’s a very large industry. I’m working with Area Agency on Aging organizations to help get, you know, age positive messages out to their organizations. So, you know, greeting card is a different thing because it’s a personal exchange from one person to another. And it’s very occasion related, like for your birthday or, you know, retirement or something like that. But the stickers are really little mini billboards about age positivity. And so those are equally as important to get out there in the world. If you I think of movements surrounding the feminist movement or Black Lives Matter, any other social causes, and the amount of, I call it swag, you see people wearing a t-shirt or a hat or stickers or buttons promoting their cause, and we just don’t do that for ageism. Speaker 2 So that’s the other part that I’m working on is just getting more swag out there so people can actually promote these messages to anybody that they come in contact with. Speaker 1 So, yeah, I think that I think that sounds great. I was going to say I lost my train of thought because you were saying so much, so much great stuff. But I would love to have you come to our senior living community and definitely speak for sure. I think. Yeah, that’s great. Speaker 2 I think the speaking part is just really more about bringing awareness to ageism and not only in our community, in our society, but within ourselves. And so I think when people stop and think about that, then they stop telling themselves they’re old for a minute or just stop themselves for a minute and think, oh, it’s probably not a good idea for me to do that because of that longevity component that I was mentioning. And then again, just giving people concrete things that they can do when they’re out and about in the world to help not only with their own mindset about aging, but to their loved ones, to those that they come in contact with. Speaker 1 So, yeah, I know what I was going to tell you. I think you should get out to the party stores. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, my gosh. There’s like whole aisles of like over the hill and all that. Speaker 1 Yeah. I don’t want to name any names, but it definitely is a national chain. But I definitely think, you know, you should get out there and create maybe, you know, banners and, you know, to replace. Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly. Yeah, like a whole party line. So, you know, because we don’t have an alternative at this point. Speaker 1 We have that stuff. Right. Do a whole aisle of, you know, positive stuff, which I think I would do. Speaker 1 And do it. At least do it in the next two years. Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. There’s a lot of opportunity. Speaker 1 You know what I feel? Speaker 2 Yeah, there’s a lot of opportunity. as well, like as you mentioned, to spread age positivity on birthdays. So I’m pretty new, kind of leading edge and leading the charge on all this and happy to be doing that. It’s going to take more than just me. So that’s why I’m trying to encourage my peers that are makers to get more age positivity out there as well, because it really does take all of us to become aware of this. Speaker 1 Definitely. And your timing is so perfect, because obviously the world has kind of shifted. Even if you look at your Dove commercials, your Old Navy commercials, they’re showing everybody. Speaker 1 It’s not all walks of life. It’s no longer, you know, which is nothing wrong with it. The beautiful person looks perfect. Speaker 1 It’s everybody. So your time couldn’t be more perfect. And having this message get out there. Speaker 1 How do we get your products? How do we learn more about you? How do we get in touch with you if someone wants to have you come and speak? Speaker 1 Me first, though. Speaker 2 So you can find me on age friendly vibes everywhere. So my website is age friendly vibes.com. I’m really active on Instagram because we’re, you know, I have a visual product and that’s where other card makers are. So I need to be right to fold there. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 I’m active on LinkedIn as well with pro aging, you know, movement and community around there. I do have a Facebook page as well under Age Friendly Vibes. So yeah. Speaker 2 And then my email is simplestjustjan at agefriendlyvibes.com. So anybody can just email me at any time and, you know, just kind of let me know, you know, if you have any, any opportunities to speak or if you, you know, want to help distribute products. I have an affiliate program as well. Speaker 2 So if you promote my products, you can get a little kickback on commission. We just want to, you know, create a birthday card stash of your own that’s got more age positive options in it. I’m there for that as well. So, yeah. Speaker 1 Well, I definitely think the folks here, like I said, I want to get your stuff in our store. I definitely it’s going to be a hit for sure. And we’ll talk more about that offline because I, you know, this is the perfect place for you to be because these guys are constantly birthdays. And I think actually for our birthday luncheon as well. What a great card to get. Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 Yeah, I think that’s awesome. So we have a lot of opportunity. So great to meet you. Speaker 1 Yes. You know, and I look forward to our future communications. We have been talking with Jan Golden from Ange Friendly Vibes on your next chapter. Speaker 1 And we’ll see you next time. Thank you. Speaker 2 Thank you. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/ "Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Life Every Day – Inspiration from Author James Flaherty") ## [Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Life Every Day – Inspiration from Author James Flaherty](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/ "Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Life Every Day – Inspiration from Author James Flaherty") August 1, 2023 We all need inspiration. 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There are many reasons older adults move into a senior living community, but is looking for love one of them? Listen to find out… ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good morning, everyone. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. By the way, it is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way that we think about aging, the way we think about senior living, and the retirement years altogether. Along with the Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, nice to see you. Speaker 2 And I am Siobhan. Speaker 1 You are Siobhan. Speaker 2 I’m Siobhan. Speaker 1 Those of you, again, keeping score at home, that’s Siobhan. I am Gary. people always confuse the two of us Speaker 2 it’s like Iron Man I am Iron Man which you have no idea what I’m talking about right now you are lost right now Speaker 1 no it’s a song I am Iron Man Speaker 2 no Iron Man’s in Marvel Speaker 1 oh yes it’s the coolest Speaker 2 at the end of two of the Iron Man’s he goes I am Iron Man which is really cool it’s very significant to like who you are so I am Siobhan it’s accepting who you are you’re not Gary I’m not Iron Man either Speaker 1 Iron Woman I’m geared. Speaker 2 There is an Iron Woman, actually. Gwyneth Paltrow. When does this come on? She becomes in the final one in games. It’s so good. Oh, they’re ending it? It’s the final one? Well, no. The final one of that Avengers section. Was that phase? I’m looking at Jimmy now. Phase two or phase three? Phase four. They just ended it. And that was part of phase four. Now we’re going into phase five. It’s very exciting. I have to admit, I am Googling it. I understand the phases now. It is actually. The Marvel thing is really cool. but she becomes he gets he makes her a suit tony who’s iron man makes her a suit and she shows up Speaker 1 in the suit when they have the final battle and it’s very cool yeah okay it is i you have to watch Speaker 2 these oh that’s right you have a mission this winter you have to watch all the avenger movies from the beginning yeah all the marvel movies it’s a lot i stopped after christopher reeve wasn’t Speaker 1 superman anymore because he got into a okay that is dc we’re done uh i cannot adam west is no longer batman right you’re still on dc that was a tv show though and then michael keaton was batman okay right and then val kilmer yes uh george clooney yes okay yep all right oh christian bale yep and the other guy from twilight he was he was it too a spider-man um spider-man there you now you’re in marvel Speaker 2 okay i did see uh the spider one of the spider-man movies yes yeah the spider-man but you saw the Speaker 1 originals probably i saw that i saw the one that just came out like uh back around christmas time or not this past christmas christmas before well like there was like yeah there was like three of the guys that played yes wasn’t that awesome man that’s the only one i ever saw see that’s my so Speaker 2 you got to start from the beginning because my little guy made me take him when we all went the You should start from the beginning. Yeah, you would love it. You really would love it. It’s really exciting. You think? Because it builds up from Iron Man, then there’s Thor, then there’s Captain America, Black Widow, Black Widow. It’s so good. Speaker 1 Thor. Isn’t Thor such a cool name? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I want my name to be Thor. I’d have to have long, flowing blonde hair, though. No, it’s just… I know. It’s probably… And a hammer. And a hammer? Speaker 2 Maybe a couple other things, but… Speaker 1 Did Thor have long, flowing blonde hair? Or did I just create that? Speaker 2 He did. Well, and then he cut it. But yeah. Speaker 1 Oh, I don’t know. Speaker 2 Yeah. But yes, he did. Yeah. And the hammer and. How about Hulk? Speaker 1 Remember Hulk? Speaker 2 Yes. Love the Hulk. I love Mark Garofalo. Yeah. I love him as Garofalo. Yeah. I love him as the Hulk. He’s the best Hulk. Speaker 1 Yeah. How about Lou Ferrigno? Speaker 2 Okay. So what’s our topic? I can’t. You never heard of him? Yes. He was the Hulk. Those are so funny though. Because what happens is I watched one of them and it’s in slow motion. So the person’s on the ground like and he’s literally they could have gone had lunch came back. It’s so you have to watch the back because it’s so slow because he’s like. Before we move on, you got to answer this for me first. Speaker 1 So slow. It’s ridiculous. All right. You got to answer this first. You are so anti-DC in pro Marvel. Like, can’t everybody just get along? You can. Speaker 2 And I do. I like DC. I like the Flash. I do, but I’m a Marvel. Because I tried to watch when they brought them all together, like Aquaman and the DC universe, but it’s not the same. The chemistry of the characters is just not the same. Speaker 1 So you’re up more Marvel. Speaker 2 I am. I like more of the actors in Marvel, too. Speaker 1 Which one’s Batman? Speaker 2 Batman’s DC. Speaker 1 Batman’s DC. Batman’s not Marvel. But you liked the Batman movie, right? I never said that. Oh. I just am aware of them. Okay. Pardon? I think she’s got like stock in Marvel here. All right. Moving along here. So before we get into our topic for today, which is making moving easier. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 You guys have a big anniversary coming up, right? Speaker 2 Yeah, we do. Yeah. My anniversary is coming up. My anniversary or the anniversary for the community? Speaker 1 I think it’s both. Speaker 2 Yeah. My anniversary was on May 9th, which was awesome, my first year. And I don’t remember being so excited about an anniversary, but I’m very excited. You know why you are? Speaker 1 Because you’re knocking it out of the park. Yeah. Speaker 2 I feel like I’m part of something. Yeah. I feel like, well, yeah. Speaker 1 That’s a great feeling when you know you’re wanted and appreciated. And you get up every morning looking forward to getting to work. Speaker 2 Because you know you’re going to impact someone’s life in a very positive way. And they hold the staff meeting in my office now, which is so cool. Because I’m behind my desk and they’re all at the table. And I’m like, you know. All right. Speaker 1 That says it all. That says it all. Folks, we have the utmost authority of senior living with us. I don’t think we know how fortunate we really are. Speaker 2 Because I am Siobhan. Speaker 1 The one and only. Speaker 2 I’m Siobhan. Speaker 1 Well, I’m glad they don’t confuse you. You’re not Gary, right? You’re Siobhan. I’m Siobhan. You’re Siobhan. I’m Siobhan. All right. All right. So you want to talk about making the moves? Like some tips for making moving easier? Speaker 2 We are going to talk about love in a senior living community. Speaker 1 You want to talk about that? Speaker 2 We’re going to talk about love. Speaker 1 I thought you want to talk about the open house that you had. Speaker 2 The open house we had actually went very well. It was really fun. And actually, we still have one more, but people can call me and sign up for. Speaker 1 Okay. Well, when is that? Speaker 2 It’s coming up today, technically. Okay. Yes. Speaker 1 So it’s not too late? It’s not too late. Speaker 2 If they hear this right now and they want to come later? They can come. How do they do that? What’s the number? 860-953-1201. Speaker 1 You want to say it one more time? Speaker 2 So 953-1201. Speaker 1 Okay. Perfect. Speaker 2 Lynn, let’s talk about our finding love. So we’re talking about love. And now I know what you’re talking about. The reason why we’re talking about love is my, which my husband’s going to kill me now, my wedding anniversary is May 14th. So in honor of that, we’re talking about love. Yes. Speaker 1 Why not? I mean. Speaker 2 You know what it is? It’s because we’re talking about Marvel. Speaker 1 I’m so glad. I’m glad you decided to join us this morning. Speaker 2 I’m so bad. There’s too many anniversaries in May. Too many. I should read my paper. Read your paper. It’s like Walter Cronkite. I’m Walter Cronkite. You know, I should read the paper. They’re very into the paper. They’re really into the paper. All right. Yes. Speaker 1 Let me do this as Walter Cronkite. Do older adults find love in senior living communities. Speaker 2 They do, actually. And it’s actually the most beautiful thing to see. It’s just like, to me, it reminds me of like when people are younger. So when they’re in their teen years or when you’re in your 20s and you fall in love because you don’t have all that life stuff in the way. Because I really believe if you fall in love in your 30s or 40s or, you know, we were talking earlier about getting divorced and getting remarried. It’s kind of like you have all that stuff. You know what I mean? But when you’re older. Speaker 1 I know what you mean. I wrote a chapter in that book about it. Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 When you’re older, you’re kind of like you’re at the scene of the community. You don’t have all that stress and you can actually enjoy yourself and just, you know, think about, oh, I’m going to go see that person for dinner. Oh, we’re going to go see the music together. And that’s really what you’re concentrating on again. Because when you’re in your teens, what else are you? I mean, you’ve got school and stuff like that, but you’re really into like loving that person because it’s so fresh. And I think when you’re older, it becomes the same way because you probably never expected to fall in love again. And I absolutely love it, especially when they’re people that I brought in and moved in and they fall in love. It’s really kind of cool. Speaker 1 I mean, both have to be, it’s got to be reciprocated. Speaker 2 It is. And it’s just so cool just to see the faces light up. And I just think it’s a beautiful thing. Yeah, I love it. I do love it. Yeah. Sometimes when I bring move-ins in, like, I’ll be like, ooh, they would be good for so-and-so. Do you ever help it along? No, no, no, no. I never kind of get involved. Although I did have a meeting in my office. This guy was a complete gentleman. He came, they set up this meeting with his son. I thought they wanted to talk to me about something about the community. And he sat down and he was just like, oh, I just wanted to make sure that it’s okay if I court so-and-so. And I felt like the godfather or something. You can court her. It’s okay. It just was the weirdest. Speaker 1 Kiss my ring first. Speaker 2 It was the weirdest situation. But it was so cute, especially since he brought his son along. I had no pre-warnings. The look on my face was probably like – but it was just so cute because obviously she doesn’t have parents anymore. So he was asking kind of like me. Speaker 1 I’m surprised they don’t ask you, though, can you find out if Gladys has somebody in her life? Speaker 2 No, I think older gentlemen are kind of bold. They just will ask the person out. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. It’s nice. Speaker 1 So then you probably can write a whole book on tips to help people make this all happen. Speaker 2 I did come up with some. So the first one I have is believe in yourself. So a lot of times, you know, even as women, as the older we get, we think, oh, we’re not attractive. We have nothing to offer, different things like that. Just believe in yourself. Believe in your personality. Believe in who you are. This gentleman, whoever it may be, is attracted to you for a reason. And it’s a real reason. It’s true. It’s not just because you’re the only person there. Because as we know, senior living communities are predominantly women. So they’ve got a, I hate to say it this way, kind of a pick of a litter kind of thing. And so it’s probably not the best way to put it. But like, you know, when you get little kittens, little puppies. Anyway, so I think that, you know, remember that this person has chosen you for a reason. And so I think that’s important. I think making the best of mealtime and activities. So if you’re really, if you’re in a scene living community, you’re hearing me right now and you’re like, you know what? I would like to find love. You know what I mean? So make the most of your activity time. Don’t necessarily already sit, always sit with the women. Don’t always sit with the ladies. You know, if you have a gentleman you’re interested in, go ahead and sit next to him. You really have nothing to lose, right? Speaker 1 What’s the worst I can say? excuse me, this seat is taken or I prefer to be dining alone. I mean, that’s it. Speaker 2 That’s it. That’s it. And then what’s, you know, you move on. You know, I mean, it’s part of life. I mean, rejection is part of life. So hopefully that doesn’t happen. That sounds horrible. Speaker 1 Well, wouldn’t I? Has it? I don’t think so. So you’re batting a thousand. I mean, everybody is interested in anybody that you’re interested in. Speaker 2 No, but a lot of times as you’re building other things too, you’re building a friendship first. So take those tips from like, you know, we always say that the best romances are ones that were friendships first. So take that tip, that romantic tip and go with it. Be friends first. You know, don’t just dive in. Get to know this person first. I think that’s really important. And dress up. You know what I mean? Dress up. I mean, you can wear jeans. You can wear khakis. But dress yourself up a little bit. Go to the hairdresser. Get your hair done, you know. Fix yourself up. You know, get dolled up. Get ready. Speaker 1 I need all the help I can get. Hairstylist, new clothes. Well, remember, now, this is a community. So they see you at your best and worst, right? Which is nice, too. Speaker 2 Which is nice. That’s why it’s kind of a nice thing, because they’re not really, like, judging you. Do you know what I mean? In a bad way. So you’re right. They do see you at your worst. They do see you at your best. Speaker 1 So if you’re out gardening and you’ve got dirt on you. Speaker 2 Mutual activities. Speaker 1 Sweating. And they’re going to see you that way as well. Exactly. Be yourself. Speaker 2 Be yourself. Yep. That was the next. It’s so funny. Be you. Bring your own personality. Be you. Don’t try to be something that you’re not. Don’t compare yourself to so-and-so at the next table. Just be yourself. So that would be – that’s actually the next tip on the thing. Ask about special activities and social hours and events. We have a lot of those at Avery Heights. We have social hours and events. And so if for some reason wherever you are or whatever has happened, ask to have those. It’s important to have because, again, you want to build a friendship. So you don’t want to have something where you’re asking someone out on a date. You want to just happen to, you know, be at a social hour with them and just mosey over with your drink and just start talking and, you know, enjoy yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 You got to be suave. Speaker 2 Yes. You got to be smooth. Exactly. Share your life. Don’t be afraid to share your life, your ups or downs. You know, if you’ve been divorced, if you if you made a mistake, if you lost a job, just share your stories because that’s that’s awesome. Who doesn’t want to hear, you know, especially if you’re a gentleman, you were in like the war or something, you know, share your stories, you know. Speaker 1 But ask her about her. Speaker 2 Don’t just look her in the eye. Speaker 1 Don’t have it all be about you. Exactly. Get to me next time. Exactly. I want to hear about you. Speaker 2 Yes, exactly. Speaker 1 Maybe raise an eyebrow. Speaker 2 No, don’t. Speaker 1 No. Speaker 2 Please don’t do that. Speaker 1 You know, please. Enough about me. No. I mean, the last thing you want to talk about is like your Thurston Howell the Third. Yeah, yeah. Don’t over talk. Yes. Yeah, right. Speaker 2 That’s another good tip. Don’t over talk about yourself. Or brag. Don’t brag. Speaker 1 Nobody likes to brag. Speaker 2 You know, talk to the, you know, we have a social worker in our community. We have a life enrichment director, me. Talk about it. You know, if you really, it’s something that you’re desiring. If you really want to, you know, have a romance, talk to people about it. Say, hey, you know, I want to have a romance. I want to, you know, have relationships with other, with a gentleman, you know, don’t be afraid to kind of get advice and, you know, maybe find out, like you said, ask, is that person eligible? You know, you know, kind of do lay your groundwork as well. You know, don’t be afraid to talk about it. Get advice if you’re having a tough time with that person that you’re in the relationship with, just like you would, you know, when you’re in your 30s, your 40s, your 20s, talk about it. Don’t be, don’t, don’t be embarrassed that you’re in a relationship. You’re still, we always talk about this is your next chapter. Your journey’s not over. You’re still here. So don’t be afraid to, you know, kind of ask for advice as well. Speaker 1 All right. So let’s define this because when you talk about relationships, that’s such a broad, you know, word. Are we talking about intimate relationships? Are we talking about friendships? Are we talking about just companionship to watch, you know, the movies with and have a cup of coffee with? I think we’re talking about all that, to be honest with you. Speaker 2 I mean, I’ve seen all those degrees within senior living. You know, anything from just being a companion and being a friend and men and women just being companions. And like you said, going to the movies, going to have mutual interests, being, you know, deeper friends, kind of talking about different things that are bothering me or something, you know, intimate stuff and having a romantic relationship. I mean, literally, if I’ve seen people go from being all of that and getting married, having that third or fourth or. Wow. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 And then they end up getting a room together, right? Yes, exactly. Speaker 2 They’re moving in with each other. I’m telling you, it’s a beautiful thing to watch. Speaker 1 Can they do that? You can have men and women living with each other. Speaker 2 Yes, well, yeah, of course, yeah. Speaker 1 What’s that? Speaker 2 Would you throw a cottage? They could. Yes, they could, yeah. Wow. Yeah. The thing that I love about it, too, that I see, and especially if someone’s there by themselves, a lot of times, as you know, if you’re in your 90s, maybe everyone, including your kids or whoever your caregivers were, have passed on. And so a lot of times what can happen is if they could find someone that does have family support and so forth. And so that family I’ve literally seen start to take care of that person. And that is the coolest thing. I had this one woman. She needed dental surgery. And her family wasn’t around. And I remember coming into work one morning and there they were picking her up and bringing her, brought her back. The family made sure she had her medicine, gave it to the nurse, what she needed. It was the most sweetest thing I’ve ever seen. Speaker 1 How often does this happen? Speaker 2 I mean, it just depends. I mean, I’ve seen – there’s probably maybe like four or five relationships that get kind of built within the community. It’s nice. I mean, in terms of friendship – I’ll say this. In terms of going all the way to marriage, that’s probably not as much as you see the companionship, making friends, and maybe just having a romance. And then speaking of that, too, you know, you need to be safe because because just like, you know, if you are kind of being intimate, you want to be safe. So take the same precautions because things can happen. I know I sound like I spell it like they’re getting pregnant. Speaker 1 Like little kids. 70 or 80. Speaker 2 Oh, see, that’s that’s the DC talk. Speaker 1 See, us Marvel people, Jimmy and myself. I’m not trying to be funny, neither. I’m thinking when you said things didn’t happen, I’m thinking to myself, a miracle. No, just like STDs. You have to be careful. I wasn’t thinking of that. Yes. But she’s right. Speaker 2 You’re right. You’re 100% right. You have to be careful. Just like you would in regular life, be careful. You’re safe from what you just said, getting pregnant, but you’re not safe from the other stuff. Speaker 1 Perfectly clear. And you’re right. I’m not even debating. You’re 100% right. I just wasn’t thinking that. Speaker 2 And also, too, be safe in terms of who you’re choosing. because there’s, you know, just like in any other, there’s Rico Suave’s, there’s, you know, Casanova’s. Are there really? Yeah. There’s like game player people? Oh, yes. And there’s jealousy and oh, yes. Is that right? So be careful. That’s why I said talk about it. Ask around, you know, does he have a boyfriend or girlfriend or whatever? You know, be careful. Speaker 1 You know, I learned so much. I don’t just host this show with Siobhan. I learn from our time here every weekend. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, Senior Living, along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Are you? Or maybe along with Gary Byron, I’m Siobhan. However you want to interpret this, my friends, it’s your world. Whatever you like. All right, so let me go back to the courting. What are some stories? What can you really – you say you mentioned the war. What if somebody wasn’t in the war? Or what if they’re just trying to make, I mean, that’s deep. I was in the war and they start talking about living through some things that they’re trying to maybe bury. But there’s got to be some comfortable conversations or short little blurbs here and there. You want to get her laughing. You want to be, and then on the other side, on the receiving side, you want to be receptive, right? And, you know, laugh at their silly jokes, even if deep down you think they’re stupid or you’ve heard them before. Oh, never heard that one before. Speaker 2 I think there’s a difference, though, in older adult romances that it is so straightforward. I mean, I don’t think they play the games. I don’t think they play the games. I mean, like I said, some people are kind of playing the field, but that doesn’t mean they play games. I think that’s pretty much this is who I am. I mean, how do you and that’s the beauty that to me, that’s the beauty of it. I mean, I literally have walked by common areas and seen people holding hands. I think that’s just adorable. Speaker 1 Oh, that’s sweet. Speaker 2 I just think it’s adorable. Speaker 1 And you know what? It’s something you don’t see that often with younger people right now. I’m just, listen, you’ve made my day, and it’s still early in the morning. I’m glad to know that just because you get to a certain age doesn’t mean that the furnace is out. Speaker 2 No, no. I think it’s beautiful. Especially, I mean, I think a lot of times once you get to that point, And I think, you know, when people become widows, and I’m just judging these things, when they, back in the day, like when you’re, if you’ve lived through World War I and World War II, and, you know, you had your husband, that was kind of it. You had your husband. And they don’t really think about, you know, another relationship a lot of times. Because they’re kind of like, that was my relationship. And they don’t think about getting remarried or having a romance or anything like that. So I think that it’s important for people to have, you know, have that maybe could be part of your next chapter. Speaker 1 This is so fascinating. Yeah. Can we talk about the other end of things? And like, what if things, the arguments and things go awry? Speaker 2 We’ve seen that. Yeah, we had to, I remember I was in a, this is not this community, but another scene in the community. And this, one of these Casanovas, he was kind of like, you know, had a few different relationships going on. And, you know, she caught him and she was like, she was very angry and she was very possessive and very upset. And rightly so. She was very upset. Yeah. So that definitely can happen. Speaker 1 Love happens not only in times when you’re not expecting them. They’re happening in locations that you would never expect them to happen. Speaker 2 It’s huge. I mean, they always, you know, television shows always show this. Always show, you know, your 911s or whatever. They always have, like, if you watch those shows and, you know, they’ll be picking, they’ll be at a senior living community and they’re, you know, some romance, someone’s having a fight or something like that. But it’s real. I mean, there’s definitely romance in senior living communities. Speaker 1 All right. So based on all your observations and your experience, the best advice that you could give, first of all, is to be yourself. That’s the best advice that I could give. But you would be maybe start off as friends. Speaker 2 Take it progressively. Speaker 1 Progressively? Yes. Like just one step at a time? Speaker 2 And definitely one day at a time, one step at a time. You know, don’t get ahead of yourself. Just kind of like, you know, and play the field safely. I mean, don’t start a bunch of romances. But definitely explore different, you know, our community actually, which is really cool. We probably have, I mean, a ton of guys. I mean, we have at least almost now 35 veterans alone. Speaker 1 Which is more women though. Speaker 2 There is, but we still have a really good supply of men. Speaker 1 A good supply of men. Speaker 2 We do. We do. We have 35. You’ve got to stock us. Speaker 1 We’re going to do shipping in on Thursday, Earl. Got some men coming in. Exactly. Speaker 2 No, what we do, we do have a very, you know, huge, yeah, sublime man. I don’t know how to say it. I got you. We have at least 35 veterans, and they’re all guys. And then we have other guys that are not. All right. So we have a very, yes. What can you? And not only guys, really guys with awesome personalities. They’re really fun. Yeah. Speaker 1 What are some activities? I get that conversation and how approaching it. You get a seat taken and you can. What are some activities that maybe they can start off with? Yeah. Speaker 2 I think the musical, you know, if you’re going to see a music entertainment, I think that’s a good one to start off with. I think bingo, you know, just like the games. Like we’re actually now we’re going through like where we’re actually teaching our residents that because one of the things like I’ll go around and do the tour and I say, oh, we have bridge with Mexican train. We have cribbage. We have all these games. And then, you know, I don’t know about most people are working. They’re not sitting at home, you know, like on Bewitched playing Bridge, right? It’s just that so who knows how to play Bridge? So now we’re doing tutorials on how to play these games. And yesterday we did one on Mexican Train and we had a really good turnout. And so stuff like that. Go to something like that. You know, learn something together. You know what I mean? We do, you know, I think that’s fun. Speaker 1 All right. Now, what if somebody comes up to you? Speaker 2 Oh, I know. And we have full kitchens in our apartments, too. So I think have them over and cook a meal, you know, something you’ve never cooked before. Speaker 1 That is a good idea. Speaker 2 You know, because a lot of if the guy’s living by himself, I mean, obviously we have the dining room. But like if he wanted to learn how to make lasagna or just, you know, I mean, you know, because most most probably gentlemen, again, from that generation probably didn’t learn to cook. Speaker 1 Yeah. What if somebody comes up and they ask you, all right, Siobhan, I just need some advice. Can you be a conduit? Can you be a facilitator to help? Speaker 2 I don’t think I should. I’ve never been asked that, but I don’t think I should, right? I think I have to stay, you know, with the exception of that meeting that I had where I gave him permission to court her because I didn’t know what to say. I was like, yes. Speaker 1 Because some people are just shy, though. So a lot of this is on the confident man and the woman. But there are some people who are a little more meek and reserved. Speaker 2 So I can help with that. I can help with it. Like we have a dining room manager, for example, that acts as kind of like a host. So I could put a little bug in their ear. The life enrichment director, I could put a little bug in her ear and say, hey, this person wants to make friends, particularly, you know, you know, of someone they want to have potentially, you know, a romantic relationship. Maybe kind of, you know, seat them here or seat them there or that type of thing. So I can help with that. But I don’t think I should become a matchmaker. That seems like a bad thing because my office is right in the front of the building. Yeah, if it backfires, they’re coming to you and blaming you. Right in the front of the building. I cannot hide. It’s like, and there’s a window too. So if I’m not, you know, I can’t be like, I’m not here. You know, it’s not good. Speaker 1 And this way they can’t blame you neither. Exactly. Speaker 2 I’ve done, I’ve done matchmaking in the past. Speaker 1 Right. Speaker 2 And some of the people are still together, but some of them are not. Speaker 1 I mean, years and years and years ago, but for that very reason, this is why I’m like, yes, look, if you just want me to introduce you, I’m fine with that. I got, cause I, that doesn’t mean anything to me. Everybody gets, it’s always polite thing to do is introduce people. But what you do with that after that introduction, that’s on you. Speaker 2 I never did that disclaimer. And so, yeah, some of these people, like I said, some of them are together. Some of them are doing okay. Some of them are not doing so. Speaker 1 Yeah. Wow. This was a fun topic. Speaker 2 Yes. Yes. It is. And I’m hoping people hear it, you know, love in the senior living community. Speaker 1 Like the villages. Remember down in Florida? Isn’t that like a big senior community? It’s not a senior facility. But isn’t it like a, I think a city within a city. Oh, really? just a lot of senior citizens happen to live in. Speaker 2 Oh, wow. Well, I’m sure in Florida. Yeah. Like Boca Raton? Is that Boca? Speaker 1 I don’t think, I think it’s north of Boca Raton. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living. Next week, again, we’re going to continue our four-part series. Say that 10 times. Four-part series on paying for senior living care. Our guest will be Family Solutions for Care, and the topic will be long-term care insurance. You do not want to miss the opportunity to learn more about this amazing benefit and how to use it. Of course, to learn more about Avery Heights, all you got to do is talk to Siobhan at 860-953-1201. Again, 860-953-1201. And also online at averyheights.org. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Purpose, Inspiration & Positive Aging, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** independent living, Purpose & Meaning, Senior Living --- ### [Welcome to the Community - The Importance of Successful On-boarding and Transitioning New Residents.](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/welcome-to-the-community/) **Published:** April 7, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Roseanne Holland Resident Services Coordinator @ The Heights gives helpful tips on transitioning to a Senior Living Community. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of the Heights at Avery Heights, a one of a kind senior living community, centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Now this show is dedicated to empowering older adults with helpful resources, ideas, inspiration and tips to encourage them on life’s journey. Now, our production is also dedicated to the younger generation so they can better understand how to develop greater communication and enjoyment for those elders in their community. Speaker 1 Along with the Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, good to see you. Good to see you. Speaker 1 How was your week? It was good. Go UConn. Speaker 1 Yes, I know. Did you see that game? Speaker 2 What was it? Monday night. I did. Speaker 2 I fell asleep at the end of it. I was so mad. I was trying to stay awake. Speaker 2 I was into the… No, I’m glad they won. But I was into the second half and I fell asleep. Speaker 2 I would rather fell asleep on the beginning, not the end. What? I wanted to… Speaker 2 I know. Really? I should have been laying down. Speaker 2 You couldn’t have taken a nap earlier? Speaker 1 I know. I watched the whole thing Monday night. And of course, I got to get up at 4.30 in the morning. I know. Speaker 2 Tuesday. That’s impressive, yeah. Speaker 1 I was dragging. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. You have no… So I got four hours in. Because the game ended around like 10 of 12. Speaker 1 But then with all the pomp and circumstances. They cut down the… They cut down the net and the ceremonies. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. The trophy and… That was a good game. Speaker 2 Those three partners were ridiculous. Speaker 1 You know what I find fascinating about that championship game Monday night? Neither team was really a contender all year long. I mean, even UConn lost in the Big East. Speaker 1 They choked. I remember that was a Friday night game. I remember watching that, and it was over only minutes into that game. Speaker 1 But look at that. They came back. Speaker 2 Yeah, and I was expecting, actually, California, San Francisco. What is it? San Diego. Speaker 2 San Diego State. I was expecting because they kept on saying that they come back in that second half because I guess the two games they had prior to, they came back. They were down like 13 or whatever, and they came back. Speaker 2 I was all into the commentary for this. I was like listening to – who was there? Was it Charles Barkley and those guys were kind of doing the commentary? Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 They were doing the – but Jim Nance, I think, was doing the actual play-by-play. Speaker 2 They seemed to have a couple of different groups of commentary. Like they had the – Well, yeah, they had the Greg Gumbel and Kellogg. And then they had a smaller – Speaker 1 Yeah. Yes. That’s like the pre and half game and the post game. But the play-by-play and the color, I think – that was Jim Nance’s last game. Speaker 2 Wow. Speaker 1 I know. Speaker 2 He’s been around for a long time. He has. Speaker 1 He’s not even that old of a guy. He’s still going to do NFL. He’s still going to do the Masters, which is going on right now this weekend. Speaker 2 Right. Speaker 1 Easter weekend. Yeah. He’s just not going to do the bracket. He’s going to want to spend more time with his family. Speaker 2 Makes sense. Got a young family. It’s a lot. Speaker 2 It’s a lot. So what’s new over at the Heights? Easter dinner tomorrow. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. We’re doing a brunch. Speaker 2 Look at that. Tim is putting the final touches, you know. That Tim. Speaker 2 The master chef he is. You tell him I said hello. I know, right? Speaker 2 Yeah. I’m excited Speaker 1 Do you have a Is it typically When you look back On the last You know Few Easters Or even just last year Was it Busy At the Heights Speaker 2 Or a lot of families Come to That is a good question And one for our guests Actually Because I started in May My anniversary is coming up On the 9th of May So I was not there For Easter I was there for Mother’s Day Speaker 1 Well yeah Because that’s in May So that’s good I always want to tell you Do people leave And go to family Or do they come I know it’s both But I’m saying The majority of people Do they leave the premises and then go to a family member’s house? Or do you have more people that, more family that come to the Heights? Speaker 2 I feel like more family than I’ve ever seen, actually, in any other community I’ve worked in come to the Heights because we actually have the hospitality rooms as well. And so I know, for example, for Christmas, and I think I’ve mentioned this a few times, I think she was there the day after Christmas. And I remember sitting at my desk and it was around like four o’clock. Speaker 2 And this is when you know it’s time to leave. And the Christmas carols started right outside my office, someone playing the piano, everybody singing, kids running back and forth. I’m like, I think it’s time to go home. Speaker 2 I’m not getting any work done here, but it was neat to see. It really, it comes to life. It’s really beautiful. Speaker 1 Well, great. Speaking of our guests, why don’t you do the liberty of introducing her? Speaker 2 Well, this is actually, and I truly mean this to me, one of the most important people at our community. I have actually never worked at a senior living community where we had this role, the resident services coordinator. Roseanne Holland is amazing. Speaker 2 She is a social worker. She’s been with the company or the organization for 26 years. And she absolutely positively is incredible. Speaker 2 She knows what she’s doing. She’s an incredible advocate for our residents, as well as she literally holds the hand of not only the residents’ families, the residents themselves, but even, like, the staff. Like, she really is that catalyst, so to speak, that brings it all together for us. Speaker 2 Oh, wow. I really. That’s remarkable. Speaker 2 And I truly mean that. I don’t know how I would do my job without her. Well, I can’t wait to meet her. Speaker 2 Let’s bring her on. So let me introduce Ms. Roseanne Holland. Speaker 1 Roseanne, nice to meet you. Welcome to the show. Speaker 3 Thank you so much. It’s wonderful to be here, and that was such a kind introduction. Thank you. It was true. Speaker 1 I can tell. Just looking at you, it’s very heartfelt. Roseanne, please, I’d love to know more about you and specifically your role and what you do at the Heights. Speaker 3 Sure. I’d love to tell you about that. It’s such a wonderful community, and I’ve been a part of it, as Siobhan said, for 26, going on 27 years. Speaker 3 I’ve been a social worker for just over 30 years, and my background is in more medically oriented social work. I came out of a hospital setting where I worked doing counseling with patients and families, And then I worked in a rehabilitation setting doing short-term kinds of things and helping people to get back into their own homes after a rehab stay. And I developed an affinity for the senior citizen population. Speaker 3 And that’s what led me to Avery Heights and then more specifically to the Heights at Avery Heights. So in my role, my day-to-day role, I have a very hands-on position. It’s a direct care role, and I’m involved with our residents really from the very time they move in. Speaker 3 And sometimes even Siobhan helps me to connect with them before they move in so that we know each other a little bit on move-in day, which is great. I work in the area that is described as independent living and assisted living. We have apartments here. Speaker 3 We have cottages. That’s all my domain, and I describe myself as being part of the package. I’m available to people as a support person. Speaker 3 I really like to help them orient to life at the Heights when they arrive so that they get off to a really good start and have a really good time here. Speaker 1 Sounds like you have an incredible value. And I would imagine not every senior living community actually has your position. That just makes the Heights just that much more spectacular and unique. Rosanne, what is your, like a typical day, what does that look like for you? Maybe give us a sample of your day. Speaker 3 And I feel as though the beauty of my role is that there is pretty much no typical day, and that’s what I love about it. I’m going to share with you some of the kinds of things that I do and some of the issues that really are a priority to me, but just know that every day is different, and I’ve learned that it’s so important to leave room in each and every day for the unexpected. because when you’re amongst people, when you’re working with people, all sorts of different things can come up any minute of any day. Speaker 3 But my priority is really to spend time with and pay attention to our residents. So I either invite people into my office if they have something that is on their mind that they want to talk with me about, but I also am happy to go to their home, either to their apartment or up to their cottage. It doesn’t matter to me. Speaker 3 I just want to be wherever they’re most comfortable. I also have lots of involvement with our residents’ families because when residents move in, everything is new for them, and likewise, everything is new for their families as well. So that’s a big component of what I do is also staying in touch with the families, making sure that their questions are answered and that they know the ropes and where to turn for the things that they might be looking for so that they can be the best support people that they can be for their loved ones. Speaker 3 A big piece of my role is, I think you get a hint of it in my title, I am the Resident Services Coordinator. As such, I’m meant to be the point person for people who live here to learn about and get connected to the supports and services that they might need as individuals. Avery Heights, I always say, is a big, beautiful place, and there’s lots to learn about it, but there’s not any way for a new resident or a new family member to know all about it from the moment they arrive. Speaker 3 So I’m meant to be that person that they know they can call on and get answers and get connected to whatever it is they might need, whether it’s nursing services, whether it’s some people want home-delivered groceries. Everyone learned how to order their own home-delivered groceries during the pandemic, whether it’s physical therapy, whatever it might be. I also have a support group that we run different support groups over the course of time. Speaker 3 Currently, we have a caregiver support group that I run along with Holly Taylor Fry, who I believe has been on your podcast previously. She’s the director of our memory care unit here. And I also like to leave, for our newer residents, although anyone’s welcome to come, a tour of our whole campus. Speaker 3 We are a continuum of care, and it’s really nice for people to get to see how all the different buildings interconnect, why people might live in one area versus a different area. Just really get comfortable, get people comfortable with their home here. Speaker 1 One of the things that you said that really struck me was your involvement and interaction with family members. And I’m just curious, who is more bright eyed, bright eyed when you initially sit down and talk to them or guide them? Is it the the potential resident, him or herself or. Or the family members, maybe like maybe a better question is who asks more questions and and is that point person that. You know what I’m saying? Speaker 3 I do. Yes, yes. And the answer, of course, varies. Speaker 3 I would almost divide that into a little bit of two categories. We have some residents that move in that have done all their own research. They have visited a variety of communities. Speaker 3 They come with their eyes wide open, and they know just what they’re looking for, and they’re kind of ready to roll. You know, they come in with their questions. Their family is very much more so on the sideline as support people, But those residents, they want to know, gee, how do I get to this activity? Speaker 2 What time does dinner start? Speaker 3 All that kind of stuff. Other times we have people, and you might be able to imagine this, where the families have really been the ones that are encouraging their loved one to make the move. So in those instances, I find sometimes those residents, upon arrival, and I try to be there on their move-in day, they might be a little bit quieter, a little more reticent. The families might be the ones really buzzing around, really with lots of questions on their mind. And over the course of time, whichever of those situations it is, it tends to even out. Speaker 1 I would imagine perhaps some anxiety and curiosity, just a wide range of emotions, really with all family members, but particularly with that new resident, you know, where, you know, they’re excited, but they’re nervous, but they’re kind of excited in some way. But I guess it’s that unknown. I think we’re all guilty of the fear of the unknown. Speaker 1 And it just takes a while, I would imagine, like anything else to get acclimated. I guess maybe a companion question would be, Roseanne, when a new resident moves into the Heights, Like, what’s the process that you use to help them transition successfully? And do you use that formula pretty much uniformly, or do you customize your process according to the individual that you’re with at that moment? Speaker 3 I absolutely have to read the room. It has to be customized. I can come in with, you know, I certainly have developed over the course of time, I have a pretty specific orientation process that I like to go through with each resident, but I have to, you know, a really basic premise of social work is you have to start where your client is at. So I have to get a sense of what are their needs right now. Sometimes I come in with, you know, all my ideas of all the fantastic things that I want to share with someone, but mostly there are times in that first visit where someone mostly really just wants to talk about themselves. They want me, they want us, the people that work here, to know who they are. Speaker 3 And that’s obviously vitally important. Some people really are much more full of their own questions that they’ve come in with. So I do have my orientation process, but the time frame that I provide that orientation process really varies from person to person, because maybe in that first visit. We just need to sit and have a getting to know you session. And equally, I want them to be very comfortable with me because when I leave that apartment or leave that cottage after that first visit, I want them to know they can count on me, they can turn to me, that I’ll be there for them. Speaker 3 So a lot of it is about developing relationships and trying to allay those very fears that you talked about, Gary, that fear of the unknown. That’s pretty big. You know, any of us taking a move to any new place. Speaker 3 That’s inevitable. So that’s, we work through that with people. Absolutely. Speaker 1 And actually, Siobhan, you can comment as well. I mean, you must, both of you, when you see that person on day one, and maybe that look on their face, and I don’t want to misstate this, or I don’t want to, but I guess it’s wonderment. And compare that to if you were to look at one day, you know, one week to the day later, you know, one week to the day later. Speaker 1 I mean, they’re probably acclimated. They’ve gotten friends and they’re already making plans. It’s just that must be a very interesting or fun week. Speaker 1 I don’t know. Maybe fun is maybe an overstretch, but certainly a unique week to observe a new resident, you know, because they’re just bright eyed. And, you know, it’s a whole new world that is right before them. Speaker 1 And I would imagine, Rosanna, maybe you can answer this. Do people have preconceived a conception of what that experience will be like? And then when they’re there for a week or two and they come to the realization of, oh, it’s not what I thought at all. Speaker 1 It’s better. And they feel relieved. I don’t know. Speaker 1 I’m kind of going all over the place here. Speaker 3 Yes, it’s a great point. And I would say the majority of people have an experience, like you have described, where they, you know, the place doesn’t feel foreign to them anymore. Once faces become familiar faces, once they know who their neighbors are and they know who the staff members are and they find the friendliness everywhere they go in the dining room when they utilize our van service. Speaker 3 I mean, everybody talks about all of our different staff members, and they say, our residents say the nicest things about all of these departments. I mean, I get so many compliments on our drivers that get people to their appointments and to their shopping trips. I get so many compliments on the servers, the wait staff in the dining room, the housekeepers who are, you know, in people’s apartments doing very important work. Speaker 3 So I think it’s once people have a sense of community, and we really are a true community here. We really talk about people becoming part of our Avery family. That really helps people to say, wow, I didn’t realize, you know, this is what it was going to be like. Speaker 3 Others who have, some people move in and they already have friends that moved in ahead of them. Those people tend to come in already having a good sense of that. You know, they come in knowing this is a community, this is a warm place, this is a genuine place. Speaker 3 And they come in with a really high expectation. Speaker 1 Folks, we’re listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with senior living specialists Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning is Roseanne Holland. She is a resident services coordinator. Suzanne, if someone is having, oh, I don’t know, maybe a difficult time adjusting, are there things that you can do to help them feel more comfortable and acclimate themselves a little bit more successfully? Speaker 3 Yes. Definitely, that’s something that we’re tuned in on. It’s something that we’re paying attention to and watching for because transitions are a really important time, beginning with getting started. Speaker 3 It’s a really important time, and if someone is having more difficulty with that, we draw in closer to that person. That’s someone that we identify, oh, this is someone that needs more support. And it’s not just me. Speaker 3 It’s a team of people here working together on that. Myself, what I like to do with someone who’s having a more difficult time in my role is I like to sit down with them and have a heart-to-heart conversation. Because if they’re willing to tell me what is going on for them, then we can work with that. Speaker 3 You know, if they share what their concern is, if they feel like, gee, I don’t feel like I fit in. I feel like I’m younger than others or older than others or whatever it might be, then we’re able to work with that. Other times, something that we’ve done, sometimes I’m the one that does it, is to take our activity schedule for the week, which is, I mean, just chock full of fantastic things to do, and really sit down with a new resident and help to identify what are some things that you might like to do. Speaker 3 Let’s go through this schedule together. Sometimes people, they’re a little bashful about things. They feel like others already have friends and they don’t. Maybe they need someone to accompany them to an activity that they might enjoy, to come see an entertainer, to learn how to sign up to take our van somewhere. Speaker 3 Sometimes it’s doing concrete things like that, doing some of the handholding, giving someone some encouragement. In addition to that, if someone is having adjustment issues and they seem to be more of an emotional nature, maybe they really are having a difficult time, we do have a consultant that can come in. She’s a licensed clinical social worker from a company called Harvest Healthcare. Speaker 3 And she’s really skilled at sitting down with people to do the counseling sessions with them in a scheduled way to really get to talk through what those issues are. That’s nice to hear. And help someone make their way through that. Speaker 3 So there’s lots of different ways that we can be helpful. Speaker 1 If I remember correctly, did you say you’ve been with the Heights for 26 years? That’s right. I’m going to ask you kind of a personal question. um what keeps you there you can go anywhere you can use your skill your experience anywhere but yet 26 years i mean that’s that’s impressive with with one company i mean that’s amazing what keeps you at Speaker 3 avery heights thank you i love that question you know just as much as i say that avery heights is a great place to live it is also a great place to work and the residents you know that’s the first that comes to mind of, you know, what keeps me here? It is these residents here. It really is a privilege for me to be part of their lives. I get to come in for my work day and kind of be who I am, be with people, be curious about people, learn from people. I learn so much from this population of residents. And when they let me into their life, that’s really a gift. Speaker 3 You know, we don’t all let new people into our lives all the time. So the fact that they do that, that really is a draw for me. And conversely, I really feel as though these residents are a part of my life. Speaker 3 You can imagine over the course of 26 years, I’ve gone through a lot of changes in my own life, and there were residents that were there on my wedding day. They showed up at the church on my wedding day. I mean, it was, you know, I could tear up just thinking about it. Speaker 3 There were residents who came to my mother’s service when my own mom passed away. So they’re really part of my life as I am part of theirs. Speaker 1 You know, it sounds like everybody’s aging or maybe a better word is just, you know, you’re going through life together, you know. You know, I’m running out of time, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t ask you for some, oh, I don’t know, some stories that you can tell us, some success stories that you’ve witnessed in your 26 years Speaker 3 there? Oh, sure. My goodness. I feel like success, you know, it comes in all shapes and sizes, right? So, I mean, small successes are great successes. People who tell me that they met up with friends that they had lost track of years ago, people that went to high school together and that haven’t seen each other since then, and they meet up again here and start having a great time. Speaker 3 they can pick up where they left off. I mean, that’s a success story to me. We had a gentleman at one time who he was very, his biggest concern was about, he felt like he’d be giving up his independence to move in and be accepting of some services. Speaker 3 And when I went back for a follow-up visit with him, he said to me, you know, it’s the best of both worlds here. He felt like he had the privacy of his own apartment, but he had the support that he needed, which he had been holding off on for a long time. That was a huge success story. Speaker 3 Another woman who moved in and was really feeling quite shy, and when I went to see her on her second day here, and it was late in the day, and she’d stayed home that whole day and she hadn’t come out yet, and I said, come on out, we’re having some entertainment. It was evening, we had some evening entertainment going on. We came downstairs together. Speaker 3 I introduced her to one gentleman, to another resident, and he took her by the hand and went from there and introduced her to everybody else and the next time I peeked in she was up and dancing and I Speaker 2 and they got married Speaker 1 just kidding now that would be a story right there what and I’m sad I’ve got to wrap this up I’ve got a few other questions that come to mind but I guess I’d want to leave it with this if there’s a piece of advice that you could tell our listeners maybe to help them with their transition into a senior living community? And I know you probably have a laundry list of things that you can go over, but what’s one or two nuggets that you can just extract from that and say, these are the top two, these are key to help you in transitioning to senior living? What would it be? Speaker 3 The first one would simply be to be yourself. You know, bring everything, bring your experiences, bring your fears, bring your questions, bring your joys, bring yourself. Just be yourself and come and share of yourself. Speaker 3 And I think that’s the best way to connect with other people. There’s no reason to come here and feel as though, no reason to move into any senior living and feel as though you can’t be yourself. If you’re someone that is a joiner, join in on things. Speaker 3 If you’re someone that likes a quieter life in retirement, you can have that as well. I just would say be open to the next step along your journey. It really has the potential to be quite wonderful. Speaker 1 Siobhan, what’s really important here is she used the term the best of both worlds when she was paraphrasing what a new resident had said who was afraid of losing their independence and maybe some of their identity with that independence. But it’s there. Yes. Speaker 1 And at a time when you need others, well, that’s there. Yes. And you don’t have that when you’re living alone and it’s 9 o’clock at night or 9 o’clock in the morning and you really need companionship that, well, you have that option. Speaker 1 Or support and services. Speaker 2 And, you know, you don’t have to worry about stairs and getting in the car and putting equipment in the car. You can just kind of go outside your door and have, like she said, the best of both worlds. Speaker 1 Thank you so much for being with us this morning, Roseanne. We’ve learned a lot. And I can’t thank you enough for giving your time to us. Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Avery Heights, by the way, is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington and Hartford. Those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care and a whole lot more. Speaker 1 Visit AveryHeights.org or call 860-953-1201. That’s 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Thank you so much for listening. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Assisted Living, independent living, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ### [The Alzheimer’s Association: Care – Support – Research – The Fight for the Cure](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-alzheimers-association-care-support-research-the-fight-for-the-cure/) **Published:** December 16, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Over six million Americans are living with Alzheimer’s. Listen as guest, Kristen Cusato, Director of Communications, Alzheimer’s Association Connecticut Chapter and Graham Kobs, Manager of the Greater Hartford Walk to End Alzheimer’s, talks about the Alzheimer’s Association and the role they play in the community and the important work they do in providing Alzheimer’s care, and support and accelerating research to find the cure and more. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning, everybody. Welcome to your next chapter. It’s all a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Speaker 1 Avery Heights is a 43-acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now, this show will provide helpful hints and tips and resources for older adults that will empower as well as encourage you in your life’s journey. Now, topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Speaker 1 Siobhan, good morning. Nice to see you. Speaker 2 Good morning. Good to be here. How was your week? My week was really good. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah, lots of fun. Like I said, I told you I’ve been working out a lot. Yeah. Speaker 2 So I’m really excited about that. That’s nice. And I’m eating right now. Speaker 1 Eating healthy and working out? Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Look at you. Speaker 2 Yes. The Mediterranean diet. Speaker 1 You know, I just had a… Last week, I love Mediterranean salads. Yeah. Speaker 2 It’s good. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 I love the greens. I love the greens. Yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah. Talk about healthy. Last weekend, it was a long weekend. Speaker 1 We had that Labor Day weekend. Yes. Some not so good weather on Labor Day. Speaker 1 But nonetheless, we’re not working. I mean, you’re with family. That’s always a good thing. Speaker 2 I did cheat a little bit, though. I went to brunch and I had eggs benedict. That is not on the Mediterranean diet. Speaker 1 You knew what I was going to ask you. I was going to ask you. It’s hard on a holiday weekend. Speaker 2 That is not on the Mediterranean diet. Speaker 1 How do you go to a cookout and say, no, I’m not going to have any of that stuff you’re grilling? Speaker 2 And then I had creme brulee for dessert. It wasn’t good. Speaker 1 Yeah, but see, here’s how I look. If you’re good for all of the other days. Yes. Speaker 1 Okay. I knew a person who was on a diet and on six days a week. they had one cheat day and it was like a Saturday almost every week. Smart. Speaker 1 Right? And that’s when she’d go out for ice cream and popcorn and whatever. Speaker 2 Yep. Speaker 1 And really, it prevented her from cheating on the other six days. Exactly. Speaker 2 And we went for a long walk afterwards too. We were down in the Middletown area, East Hampton. So we went for a long walk by the water and it was absolutely awesome. Speaker 1 Speaking of walks. I know. There are, well, and this is timed perfectly because you wouldn’t want to have gone for a long walk just a couple of weeks ago when it was, you know, mid-90s with oppressive humidity. Speaker 1 Right. You want to know what kills me? I’ll be driving home on days like that. Speaker 1 It’ll be 95. I’ll leave the radio station. It’s like, you know, one in the afternoon. Speaker 1 I’m driving home and I see somebody on the side of the road and they’re just jogging. And I’m like, you know. And threatened. Speaker 1 Well, and here’s the thing. No, no, no. And I’m not, yeah, it’s like jog, go for it. There’s, before you go to work, or as most people, people like to sleep to the last possible second in the morning. Speaker 1 But like at home, in the evening, you know, sunsets, you know, it’s a little earlier now, but I’m thinking to myself, it’s cooler. Why in the world are these people in full jog at two, at like noon? Speaker 2 This is the time to walk though, to fall and fall and the spring. Because you got the nice weather in the morning and the nice weather in the afternoon. This is the best time because you’re not sweating. You’re not, you know. Speaker 1 Couldn’t agree more. Perfect timing. Introduce our guests that we have this week. Speaker 2 Our walking guests. Speaker 1 They walked all the way here. That’s how much they like walking. Speaker 2 So I’m glad to introduce Graham and Kristen from the Greater Hartford Alzheimer’s Walks. And they’re going to talk about the Alzheimer’s Association, which is near and dear to my heart. I was actually on the board of the Alzheimer’s Association a few years back. Speaker 2 And we’ve got all sorts of fun stuff like the Brain Ball. And it’s a great organization. You know, I always tell everybody, anyone that has families, dementia, Alzheimer’s, and it’s so many people, they’ll say, are you connected with the Alzheimer’s Association? Speaker 2 No. And I’m like, no. That’s your heart there. That’s your support. That’s what’s going to lift you up. Speaker 2 That’s what’s going to get you through the tough days if you have a loved one that has that. So I’m really honored to have them here as my guest. Speaker 1 Welcome. Speaker 2 Thank you. Speaker 3 Thank you very much. Speaker 1 I did an Alzheimer’s walk about four years ago. Very nice. Of course, weather is everything. Speaker 1 I think I would have chosen if it had rained that day. Because you have a whole bunch of them. I would have chosen another week. Speaker 1 But the weather just cooperated very, very nicely. So welcome to the show. A lot of us are familiar with the Alzheimer’s Association. Speaker 1 But for those who may not be, please tell us a little bit about it. Speaker 4 Sure. Thank you so much for having us. We are so excited to be heading into walk season. Speaker 4 walks in Alzheimer’s season. We have six across the state and this fall, and we’re just inviting everyone to come. And the Alzheimer’s Association are really our main goal is to be there for caregivers, to be there for people who are going through this disease, be there for people who are at risk for this disease. And what we do is we help the 80,000 people living in Connecticut with Alzheimer’s and their caregivers, many who are unpaid family members. And we help them with classes, support groups, care consultations where, hey, I have got this disease now in my family. Speaker 4 What do I do? Call us and we can help guide you through the process. Speaker 1 Are you talking to the individual who has dementia, who has Alzheimer’s? Are you talking with their families? Speaker 4 All of the above. Speaker 1 And when you speak with, who do you speak with first usually? Who’s usually the initial person to make contact? Speaker 4 To make the call. It’s usually a caregiver. Yeah, I would imagine. Speaker 4 But what’s great to know is as you go on and learn more about what you can do, you realize that we have these great things called early stage engagement activities. So people in the early stages of the disease can do music bingo. And we have choirs and we have museum programs and things for people to stay activated and connected because that’s so crucial once you get a diagnosis. Speaker 1 It is an insidious disease, really. And it’s slow from the experience that I’ve had with it, where the onsites of dementia and eventually getting to the stage of Alzheimer’s. Because people, they seem to use dementia and Alzheimer’s kind of interchangeably when, in fact, they’re very different. But when you get to the latter stages, I mean, it’s a slow process, at least by what I’ve witnessed, where you see the decline in memory and where it goes from, you know, simple functions that you do on a routine basis where you, you know, where you become forgetful more and more and more often. But talk about the different stages or, I don’t know, levels maybe? Would that be a better term? Speaker 4 I think maybe just to start off, to explain the difference between dementia and Alzheimer’s. There you go. Right, because I think that that’s really confusing to some people. And dementia is actually the umbrella term of symptoms that you experience when you have this disease. Speaker 4 So the confusion, the behavior because you’re frustrated, the repeating of stories, the getting lost, coming home from somewhere. That’s what dementia is. Alzheimer’s is actually the biological disease and the changes in your brain that causes the symptoms. Speaker 4 So there are different things that cause those symptoms of dementia. Alzheimer’s is one. That’s the most common type. Speaker 4 There’s Lewy body dementia, which my mom had some familiar with that. There is vascular dementia, which may happen after a brain stroke or a TIA. There is frontotemporal. Speaker 4 There’s mixed dementia. So there’s different types of biological changes in the brain that cause those symptoms of dementia. We use those terms interchangeably, and we’re the Alzheimer’s Association, but we deal with all the different types of dementia. Speaker 1 Do we know yet what specifically causes it? Is it genetic? If families have history of it, are you more apt? Speaker 1 Are you more prone if someone in your family has had it? Or is it environmental? Is it biological? Speaker 1 Is it, do we know any of that? Speaker 4 Yeah, we know a lot of stuff. Good, good. Age is the greatest risk factor, right? Speaker 4 So unfortunately, most of the folks who are diagnosed are diagnosed over the age of 65, But more people are diagnosed now in their 30s and 40s and 50s even. It’s really a younger onset situation sometimes. There are other risk factors in addition to that. Speaker 4 There’s a small genetic risk factor. And if your loved one, your mother or your father or your sibling has the disease, you are at a greater risk of getting the disease. It doesn’t mean you’re going to get it. Speaker 4 There’s environmental factors. There’s a race situation where black African Americans are two times as likely to develop Alzheimer’s and Latino Hispanics are one and a half times. What we do know is that sometimes people come forth with already some of those issues like the risk factors like the heart issues or the diabetes or blood sugar concerns. Speaker 4 So there are lots of things. We are looking into doing more research and more inclusive research, including people in research trials is so critical and really what we’re focusing on. Because this isn’t just a disease for white people. Speaker 4 This is a disease for everyone, unfortunately. Speaker 1 What kind of – and as I’m listening to you, what kind of strides have we made in combating? Speaker 4 Well, we do have a new drug that was approved by the FDA last year, albeit involved in some controversy. But it is a drug that actually attacks the amyloid plaques, which is one of the biomarkers in your brain, and gets rid of it to give families more time. There are. The good news about that is that that’s the first generation and there are four more that are scheduled to come before the FDA in the next 18 months. Speaker 4 So there are other generations of drugs that could actually disease modify. We’ve never had a disease modifying drugs. The drugs that we have deal with symptoms only. Speaker 4 Now we also are looking at, and haven’t talked about this in a while, brain health, lifestyle interventions like you guys were talking about, the Mediterranean diet, walking, making sure. There are 10 ways to love your brain. Making sure that your head is protected when you’re biking. Speaker 4 Getting enough sleep. The gut-brain connection. There’s just so much. Speaker 4 Yeah, I saw your face. Getting enough sleep. That is a challenge. Speaker 4 I’m guilty. But when you get that sleep, make sure that it’s good sleep. Because when you sleep, you can actually have the toxins washed from your brain. Speaker 4 So there’s a lot of great research out there about things we can do now to reduce our risk later. Speaker 2 And medications too, right? Like if you take something for like if you have a stomach diarrhea or something, those medications that kind of dry out the brain? Does that do it to like antihistamines? I went to a seminar one time and they mentioned that. Speaker 4 I know there’s a lot of talk about the gut-brain connection and a lot of talk about actually sleep aids, right? So probably not so good if you take a lot of those sleep aids. They’re not good for your brain. You know, you’re making faces like the sleep issue is a big deal for morning DJs. Speaker 1 Oh, geez. You knew a time I went to bed and got up regularly. I mean, if you did this once every now and then, You’d be like, well, we all have had nights or mornings like that. Speaker 1 But five days a week when you go to bed at 1130 and get up at 4, 415, you know. Weekends are a little different. But I know. Speaker 1 I’m listening to you and I’m like, oh, ouch. Speaker 4 Well, there’s a lot of things we could do now. And that’s what’s really important is it’s never too late to start these things. It’s never too late to start doing things to reduce your risk later. Speaker 1 When did this become a thing? For me, I remember hearing the word Alzheimer’s in the late 80s. And it was really, it was surrounding Reagan. Prior to that, it was, oh, don’t listen to him. Speaker 1 He’s going senile, which is a word I never hear anymore. It was, ah, they’re just going senile. Well, now it’s just, when did all this occur? Speaker 1 I’m sure it predates my memory. Speaker 4 I want to say probably 30 years ago, but I think 30 years ago is probably 50 years ago. Speaker 1 Yeah, it’s already 35 years since Reagan. Speaker 4 Alzheimer’s was discovered in the early 1900s, to be honest with you. Yeah, yeah. But people thought that it was just a part of normal aging, which is a big myth. Speaker 4 It is not. Not everyone has to get this disease. Not everyone gets this disease. Speaker 4 It’s not, oh, grandma’s just senile. Put her in the back of the room there. Right. Speaker 4 We’ll give her some food and some TV. That’s not how it works. There are 101-year-olds who are incredibly sharp. Speaker 4 So it’s not that everyone has this disease. And the good thing about it is when you learn and you know what these early signs are, i.e. come to a 10 signs class that we teach and you can learn what they are, then you know when it’s time to take your memory concerns to a doctor. Speaker 1 Yeah, because we’ve talked about this many a time, Siobhan, where you have somebody 100 and 102 years old and they’re sharp as a tack. You know, they had somebody with a Louis body like Robin Williams. Right. Speaker 1 Didn’t he? He had that. And he wasn’t. Was late 60s, I think, is what he was. Speaker 1 What he was at the time. um what are some things that we as caregivers or as the the children of some of these individuals with um alzheimer’s what can we be on the lookout for are there telltale signs where oh where maybe one thing in and of itself ah brain fog what happening but if it’s over and over if it’s consistent what should we be looking out for maybe taking note of Speaker 4 Yeah, I think one of the things to look out for is the short-term memory issues. So if you’re like, we had breakfast already, Mom. Oh, no, I’m hungry again. Speaker 4 I want to have breakfast. So it tends to happen in this disease that the short-term memory goes away and the longer-term memories remain. So maybe some short-term memory issues, like they forgot that they recently went somewhere. Speaker 4 Like I said, forgetting how to come home from a familiar place, you know, that’s a concern. You know, having those visual spatial issues, you know, with my mom, for example, she was she was Nick in the car because she was having a hard time getting into the into the garage. Right. Speaker 4 So like having some visual and hitting the curbs, that kind of thing. So having some visual spatial issues. There are a lot of signs, but it’s more about like looking at them as a whole. Speaker 4 If you have your keys in your hand, all right, losing your keys, that doesn’t mean that you have Alzheimer’s. Speaker 1 I hope not, because I know some people lose their keys on a daily basis. Right. Speaker 4 But having the keys in your hand and not knowing what they do. Right. Or being in your car and not knowing that R is reverse and D is drive, right? Speaker 4 So things like that. So think about these things. I would say as a caregiver or someone concerned, go to one of those classes or you can look up online, alz.org slash ct. Speaker 4 Look up what the 10 signs are. Call our helpline. If I could just throw that in, 800-272-3900. Speaker 4 It’s our 800 helpline that anyone can call at any time with any questions about dementia. It’s free. Speaker 1 I’m glad to hear that. Well, we want to mention that as often as we can throughout this show. You know what really got me when you said it’s not a matter of where did I put my keys or where did I put my glasses or where did I put – because we all say that, and that doesn’t mean we’ve got any form of dementia. Speaker 1 But why – what do these do? Or what does that army – yeah, that really hits. Tell us about the services that you guys offer. Speaker 4 So we do have those education classes, which are free, and they are most of them online. We pivoted during COVID. We went online like everybody else, and we were actually able to serve more people, which was quite amazing because instead of having to drive somewhere, you could just pop into the next room and go on Zoom. Speaker 4 So we have education classes on everything from what are the 10 signs to effective communications, how to speak to someone who has this disease. One of the big myths I like to say is you cannot make them come into your reality anymore. You have to go into theirs. Speaker 4 You have to meet them where they are, which is just such a key thing to being able to speak to somebody and never arguing, right? So those kinds of things. We have care consultations, like I mentioned. Speaker 4 When you get diagnosed, you can call us and we can sit down with you and help guide you through the process. We have support groups for adults, for children, for those living with the disease. It’s really important to know you’re not alone. Speaker 4 So talking to other people, just getting their advice, that kind of thing. and then you know we have a lot of different things that we do which we need to raise money for and that’s why you know we have these big events like our walks and we are very excited about our walks Speaker 1 tell me about these walks because i’m looking at them and looks like you’ve got oh my goodness a half a dozen or so um and they all they begin very shortly on saturday september 24th and they really kind of run through mid-October. So what’s its purpose? How much money are you expected to raise? And where does that money go? Yeah, absolutely. Thank you again very much for the Speaker 3 opportunity to be here. So the Walk to End Alzheimer’s events themselves are our largest fundraising platform. There’s over 600 throughout the nation. As you mentioned there, we have six in the state of Connecticut beginning in September. Our first mega weekend is on the 24th where we We have two walks in one day and then one on the Sunday as well. Speaker 3 And then they proceed through. The last event is on October 16th at Rentschler Field. Walks themselves are opportunities for folks. Speaker 3 A lot of time it’s their first touch point to the Alzheimer’s Association and what we do. It’s where we gather folks of all ages to come together, celebrate, remember their loved ones, and find out additional information about the Alzheimer’s Association. Speaker 1 How long are the walks? Speaker 3 They vary in length. anywhere from 1.5 to 3 miles, depending on the site and location and how much space we have in the communities to utilize. How many people do you usually get at these? Speaker 3 Hundreds. Hundreds to thousands is always our expectation. Wow. Really? That many? Speaker 3 There’s a humongous need for what we do, and our fundraisers are incredibly dedicated and loyal, and they realize that without these critical funds, we can’t do what we do and keep our programs and services free for caregivers and loved ones. Speaker 1 All right. So explain to me how this works. Walk me through this. Speaker 1 So I’m going to go and walk on one of these days. Yeah. Do I just fill out a form and pay an entry fee or do I get sponsors to sponsor me or how does this? Speaker 1 Sure. Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, we keep it real simple, frankly. We do have a website. Speaker 3 I like that. Yeah. We have a website, a fundraising platform where we encourage folks to register themselves. Speaker 3 They sign up and give some information related to their address and T-shirt size. we also encourage folks to form a team so team yeah so we’d have a team here at the station right and all you and your co-workers can join the team and then fundraise could either using that platform teams uh you don’t have to be on a team you can sign up as a participant as well there’s no fee to register although we do encourage fundraising to receive the t-shirts for the walks we have a minimum fundraising expectation of a hundred dollars oh that’s not too bad it’s not too bad at all. And most teams far surpass that goal. The money that is generated, number one, Speaker 1 where does it go? Does it stay here within state or do you ship it off to the national headquarters? Speaker 3 So we are a national organization. Our office is located in Chicago, although the programs and services that we raise this money for helps folks right here in Connecticut. Okay. Generally speaking, Speaker 1 How much have you been able to raise through these walks? Nationally? No, let’s say right here, these six in Connecticut in years past. Speaker 3 Last year we raised over $1.34 million. Now we’re cooking with gas here. Speaker 1 Yes, this is what I wanted to eat. This is why I said it more for the state of Connecticut. This is fantastic. Good for you guys. I’m proud of the work that you’re doing. Speaker 3 That number, too, I should make mention. That’s made up of our walks, our peer-to-peer fundraising events, But then we are also sponsored by some great organizations, both locally and larger corporations throughout the state of Connecticut as well. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Siobhan is here. I know. Speaker 2 And Avery Heights will be walking. Yay! All right! Speaker 3 Avery Heights is also a sponsor of the Hartford event. Speaker 1 Graham Cobbs, manager of the Greater Hartford Walk and Alzheimer’s. Also, Christian Casado, director of communications for Alzheimer’s Association. um there’s a i gotta be a tremendous amount of research involved in in all of this and it’s it’s just like it’s like probably peeling back layers and layers of an onion um tell us about that Speaker 4 so very exciting i just came back from a huge research conference in san diego i’m also a research champion which doesn’t mean that i’m a researcher or a doctor i’m not even worthy to be I just learned about the research and I can share it with you guys. So, you know, we are funding at present, the Alzheimer’s Association is funding $2 million in research right here in Connecticut. Speaker 2 Wow. Yeah. Speaker 4 And people are really looking at interesting things. You think it’s all drug development, but it’s not at all. We are looking at, for example, at UConn Health, we are looking at a gentleman who’s looking at the difference between and the connection between depression and dementia. Speaker 4 There is somebody at Yale who’s looking at the very unique types of Alzheimer’s, unique types of dementia presented with language issues or visual issues. There’s also someone at Yale who is now looking at alcohol misuse and dementia. There is a lot of great research happening right here in the state. Speaker 4 And it’s very exciting with these younger researchers and out-of-the-box research. If you wanted to get involved in research and check it out, go to TrialMatch. match on our website is a way you can get involved in clinical trials and you find out what’s near you. You can be involved even as someone who’s a caregiver or someone who doesn’t have the disease. Speaker 4 And it can be something as simple as filling out some questions and they’ll watch your cognitive changes to hopping on a treadmill to, you know, a drug development, drug testing. So there is so much research going on. And now, like I was saying, the lifestyle research, that’s really hot right Speaker 2 now. I think that’s the saddest one is when we see folks at the community that it’s substance abuse that may have brought on their Alzheimer’s or dementia. It’s so sad to know that you might have caused this on yourself. And I think in some ways some people say it’s the most agitated where we’ve had people just walking and walking and walking and just can’t relax. What about the Speaker 1 flowers and the ceremony and all of that that occur at these walks? I want to go back and talk about these walks one more time before we wrap Speaker 3 things up here. No, I can talk about walk all day long. It’s an amazing event. Speaker 3 The flowers themselves are a very special portion, and I would say far more important than the distance that we walk. It’s our Promise Garden ceremony, which takes place at the beginning of the day, and then our walks begin immediately after that. But our Promise Garden ceremonies are where we bring folks up on stage. Speaker 3 As you arrive to the walk, you can stop at the check-in tent to turn in any additional donations that you have, although we do encourage folks to raise money online by using either our mobile app or directly through the website. But once you checked in, you can head right to the Promise Garden tent, we call it, and you can pick up a flower of your choice. There are four different colors that represent four different associations and connections to the disease. Speaker 3 The flowers themselves are large pinwheels. So if you can grab a visual kind of of what I’m saying here through the radio, it’s an amazing visual scene when everyone holds up the flowers together in the wind. But there’s four different colors. Speaker 3 We have blue, yellow, orange, and purple. Speaker 2 I would hope purple. Speaker 3 That’s the first color that comes to my mind. Yeah, and I’m going to actually, Kristen, you want to go into a little bit deeper detail on those colors? Speaker 4 Just real quick. Blue is if you have the disease. Yellow is if you’re a caregiver. Speaker 4 Orange is if you are a supporter. And purple is if you’ve lost someone. Gotcha. Speaker 4 And the white one, real quick. Speaker 3 Yeah, and the white is really a moving part of the ceremony. That’s the last flower to be announced, and that will represent our first survivor, of which we’ve yet to find. Speaker 1 Folks, these walks are coming up in eastern Connecticut on Saturday, September 24th, and western Connecticut also on Saturday, September 24th. Yeah, two going on at the same day. It’s going to be hard. Speaker 3 Yeah, that’s our mega weekend. So two on the same day and then one the following in New Haven. Speaker 1 That’s right, the following day in New Haven on Sunday, the 25th of September. Then we head into October through central Connecticut Sunday, October 2nd, Sunday, October 9th in Fairfield County, And then on Sunday, October 16th in Greater Hartford, really quick, take me in one minute or less. Take me through what a typical day is. What can somebody expect on walk day? Speaker 3 So right upon arrival, you’ll be greeted by volunteers within the organization that can kind of escort you to the site itself. Once you’re in the area, all the events have DJs. So it’s a fun, festive environment. Several of our events have kid zones that are specifically to keep the children entertained during the walk. It’s not a long experience. Speaker 1 Are they city streets or is it around a track? It’s a variety of both. Speaker 3 Depending on where the sites are located at Rensselaer Field, we utilize the long walking area around and actually go through the stadium as well. Very nice. And then we have the Promise Garden ceremony. Like I said, there’s a DJ. Folks of all ages attend and then begin the walk. Speaker 1 I heard the word volunteer a minute ago. Is this something that you’re always looking for? And how does one get in touch to volunteer? Speaker 3 Yeah, absolutely. So we can’t do what we do as an organization without our amazing volunteers. And as far as staff partners goes, there’s not too many of us in Connecticut. So we have an army of volunteers, though, that volunteer in all aspects, whether it’s our programs and caregivers or at walks themselves. Speaker 1 Yeah, because I’m thinking to myself, well, what can we do? How can we help? What can we do to help the Alzheimer’s Association? Speaker 3 Call me, and I’ll get you in touch. It’s as simple as that. It’s as simple as that. Speaker 2 DM you, right? Speaker 3 Yeah, absolutely. No, the number one step is first just, you know, we can cater to whatever time you have. We will work with your schedule. And it’s very important to me that everyone that volunteers has an impactful and really relevant feeling from the day. Speaker 1 Kristen, talk about that helpline once again and why it’s so key. Speaker 4 Absolutely. 800-272-3900, 24-hour helpline with trained social workers on the other end. You can ask any question about dementia. Speaker 4 You can say, hey, I need a doctor in Bloomfield. Or, hey, my mother is at the door. It’s 2 a.m. with her bags packed, wanting to go home, and she’s home. Speaker 4 How do I talk her down from this? How do I reduce the agitation? So that 800 number is key. Speaker 4 I just encourage everyone to use it. Again, you are not alone. Speaker 1 I want to thank our guest, Kristen Casado, Director of Communications for Alzheimer’s as well. I appreciate the work that you do as well. Graham Cobbs, Manager of the Greater Hartford Walk to end Alzheimer’s. Of course, folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. Speaker 1 Please be sure to join one of these walks that I just mentioned. If you are able to, again, for more information on the Connecticut Alzheimer’s Walk 2022, go to alz.org forward slash ct. Or again, that helpline, 800-272-3900. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next Saturday, have a good one, everybody. Speaker 1 So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. You will… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") ## [Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") September 8, 2023 The Heights at Avery Heights was honored to speak with Teepa Snow one of the world’s leading advocates and educators for anyone living with dementia… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's, Healthy Aging & Wellness **Tags:** Alzheimer's, Brain Health, Caregiving, Dementia, Healthy Aging --- ### [The Connecticut American Parkinson's Disease Association (CT-APDA)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-connecticut-american-parkinsons-disease-association-ct-apda/) **Published:** March 24, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** The APDA Connecticut Chapter supports those in our community who are impacted by Parkinson’s disease. This episode we learn about this amazing organization as we speak with Holly Seymour, Program Director for the Connecticut Chapter. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of the Heights at Avery Heights, a one of a kind senior living community, centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. It is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way that we think about aging, senior living, and the retirement years. Speaker 1 It is time to celebrate our seniors and give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, with inner peace, and the courage to never give up on growing. We will discuss exciting opportunities, important resource for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health. It’s all hosted by the Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly, and I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Siobhan, good to see you. Good to see you. How are you this morning? Speaker 2 Very good. How’s your week? Very good. The week was awesome. Speaker 1 You always have awesome weeks. I know. I’m so jealous. I have good weeks. I don’t know about awesome weeks. Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s awesome. Speaker 1 Maybe in the summer. Speaker 2 That’s because we’re the best. A Place for Mom voted us the best senior living community. Yeah. Speaker 1 But that’s not new. That’s not surprising. But that’s exciting. Well, this is a new thing. That is exciting, but it’s not surprising. Speaker 2 We just did a pizza party, actually, for our staff, because I don’t make it the best, right? They made it the best. Speaker 1 Well, every spoke makes the wheel turn. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 So everybody. Speaker 2 Yeah. But it’s exciting because our, come to find out, the guy, George, who’s our dining room manager. He’s like kind of like, you know, almost like the maitre d’ or, and he does a really good job. He actually used to own a bunch of pizza places in Canada. So he made the pizza. Let me tell you, this pizza was awesome. I have like four or five pieces. And so my goal is to, uh, during the summer, I want to get like a brick oven pizza maker. And then I want to have him, this pizza was, how do you get a brick of either? You have a brick. Apparently you could just order them on Amazon. Speaker 1 Really? You have one or not. Well, it’s either you have one in your house or you don’t. No, Speaker 2 Apparently, you can order them and you can have them outside. Speaker 1 Oh, outside. Okay. Speaker 2 This pizza was that good. It was really. Speaker 1 Oh, man. Speaker 2 And then we served it for, he made additional, and we served it for our appetizer for our happy hour that day, and they loved it. The residents loved it. Isn’t it crazy, the little hidden, it’s not a hidden talent, because he owned like 13, I think it was called Papa’s Pizza in Canada. Speaker 2 He owned 13 of them. So that’s not really a hidden talent. No, no. Hidden to us, because we’re in the United States. Speaker 1 Well, they have brick oven pizza places here in Connecticut. Speaker 2 I’m telling you. I’m like, I’m not going to mention the pizza. Pizza is so hard for me because I’m even like sushi. Speaker 2 Like I’m Chinese food. I’m like a particular person. And I have yet to find a pizza place. Speaker 1 Oh, come on. Speaker 2 I’m telling you. Speaker 1 Here in Connecticut, we’re like known for great pizzas. You’re kidding me. Speaker 2 This pizza, I don’t usually eat four or five pieces of pizza. Thank you, Jimmy, for shaking your head. I wish we were on the live thing right now. So you could see the support that I’m getting. Speaker 1 Do you like the New York style or the Chicago style? Speaker 2 Oh, I think you were going to name places. Oh, I like thin crust. Speaker 1 Yeah, New York style. Speaker 2 Like a good, yeah. Yeah, me too. Like a good crust. Speaker 1 Yeah, I don’t like Chicago style. Like the real thick, it’s all doughy. Speaker 2 But I hate, like he had that really good crust at the end. You know how you eat it, eat it, eat it, and then at the end you got that nice piece of crust that you can just, that’s what I enjoy. That’s a good pizza to me. I don’t like a pizza where, like I don’t like centerpieces. I don’t even understand centerpieces of pizza. Speaker 1 Okay, first of all, you’re talking about Greek pizzas. Speaker 2 Yeah, I don’t like centerpieces. Speaker 1 Where they cut in squares. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 Okay, the Italians cut it in triangles. Speaker 2 That’s what I like. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 And I like a good crust at the end so I can… Speaker 1 You’re getting me hungry now. Speaker 2 Yeah, like fried dough. Good Lord. It reminds me of fried dough. Speaker 1 I love fried dough. That’s like… I can’t go to a fair and not get fried dough. Speaker 2 Okay, sad. Sadly, first time I tried fried dough was last year. What? At the July 4th. Speaker 1 Why? I don’t know. Speaker 2 It just didn’t appeal to me. But that was all they had there. They had ice cream and I’m lactose intolerant and fried dough. And I was hungry and I was like, all right, I’ll try fried dough. Now I’m like addicted to it. Speaker 1 Sauce, sugar or powdered sugar or cinnamon or what? Doesn’t matter. Oh my goodness. That’s the first time you’ve ever. Speaker 2 I know. Speaker 1 I guess I can’t make fun of her too much because there’s a whole host of classic movies I’ve never seen. Right. People are like, want to see the second Top Gun? I go, I never even saw the first. Speaker 2 I’m like, oh, no. Speaker 1 I’m like, oh, I’ve never. All right, we’re done. I’m sorry, Hal. We’re done. Speaker 2 I’m sorry, Hal. Speaker 1 No. We’ll have you on another time. I saw it from Star Wars. I’ve never. Speaker 1 Okay. All right. That’s it. Speaker 1 After that, I was like. In fact, I was seven. I remember seeing Star Wars in 77 at the theater. Speaker 2 All right. But you’ve seen the Avenger movie. Speaker 1 I took my. Jeez, I think I took my son. The last one. Speaker 1 Okay. I only seen one. That’s Robert Downey Jr., right? Speaker 1 Yes. Okay. Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh. Speaker 1 Jeez, I’m getting chastised. Speaker 2 You have homework to do. How can you not see Top Gun? All right, bring Holly in so I can talk about the volleyball scene. Go ahead. Speaker 1 Why don’t you introduce your guest? I know who she is. I know what she does. I have a whole bunch of questions for her, but I’d love for you to introduce her. Speaker 2 I am so excited to introduce Holly Seymour. She’s the program director for the Connecticut chapter of the American Parkinson’s Disease Association, the Connecticut APDA. She’s actually, I want to say that she’s a former, she worked at another senior living community. Speaker 2 So she’s a former competitor. So I feel like we’re Rocky and Apollo. You know what I mean? Speaker 2 But now we’re collaborating. Now we’re friends. Speaker 1 I was going to say, Apollo Creed and Rocky Balboa, he helped them. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 I did see this movie. Speaker 2 And that’s what’s happening here. So I think. Rocky 4 was it? Speaker 2 So I guess I’m like Apollo and she’s Rocky because I’m helping her. Right? Hey, I did it for you. Speaker 2 I did it for you. I’m just happy to be here. Speaker 3 we wish you were here actually appropriate it’s an appropriate topic for yes so it’s perfect yes Speaker 2 yes we’ll call you creed oh holly creed nice there you go i’ve been called many things in my life so Speaker 1 i’ll take creed and siobhan Mattingly exactly the eye of the tiger and i’ll be mick you can’t win come on you can’t win come on adrian adrian all right oh my goodness holly tell us a little bit about yourself before we get too deep into the questions in the weeds here a little bit well Speaker 3 first thank you for having me here i’m just honored to represent the connecticut chapter of the american parkinson’s disease association um and that’s a mouthful but yes i joined the chapter as a volunteer back in 2017 as a facilitator for support group in Glastonbury, where I was working in the senior living industry. You know, and Siobhan can talk about how we meet families along the way, and they touch our heart. And I met a caregiver who was advocating for his wife with Parkinson’s, and it awakened this passion for serving the Parkinson’s community inside of me. So, you know, later on, my career took me to Farmington, and I started another a Parkinson’s support group in 2019. Speaker 3 And I still host that support group each month. We meet at the Farmington Senior Center the second Friday of the month. And, you know, it’s a really great group that has folks with Parkinson’s as well as their care partners. Speaker 3 We’ve had some really fun topics with guest speakers on home care and VA benefits, all the way to medical cannabis programs. And we recently talked about how table tennis or ping pong is becoming a popular form of exercise and social activity for the Parkinson’s community. I love ping pong. Speaker 3 Yeah. I mean, I’ve never really played it. I always think of Forrest Gump, you know, and him playing it in that great movie. Speaker 3 So I definitely want to see if we can get it going here in Connecticut and boost that as another way to, you know, be active with Parkinson’s. Speaker 2 That is awesome. I’m in on that. We’re waiting in a couple weeks to talk about opportunities. Speaker 2 I love ping pong. That sounds amazing. I’m not saying I’m good at it, but I like it. Speaker 2 Gary might call the games. And I could be the color voice. Speaker 1 That’s right. That’s right. Hello again, everybody, and welcome. Speaker 2 The ping pong open. That’s right. Sponsored by. Speaker 1 Tell us a little bit about the APDA, known as the American Parkinson’s Disease Association. Speaker 3 Yeah, so here in Connecticut, we represent the local chapter, but the American Parkinson’s Disease Association, or APDA, is the largest grassroots network dedicated to fighting the Parkinson’s disease and works tirelessly to assist more than one million Americans with Parkinson’s live life to the fullest. We were founded in 1961, and we have raised and invested more than $226 million to provide outstanding patient services and educational programs. So I’m excited to elevate public awareness about the disease today with you all on this program this morning. Speaker 1 How many people are inflicted with it, just out of curiosity, because it seems to be lately more prevalent now than I remember it even as a kid growing up? Speaker 3 Absolutely. So every six minutes, there’s a new Parkinson’s disease diagnosis. And the prior data, we would say every nine minutes. Speaker 3 But we’ve had to readjust that because there’s 90,000 new diagnosis of Parkinson’s each year nationally. And there’s approximately 1 million people living with Parkinson’s today. So here in Connecticut, it accounts for 12,000 Connecticut or nutmeggers having Parkinson’s. So, you know, I think that we can all start to see it more, whether it be environmental impacts. Speaker 3 There is some relation to Vietnam veterans with some of the things that they were exposed to in Vietnam. You know, we’re doing more studies to find out more. We’re pouring money into research to really get at the cause and then lead us to the cure. Speaker 1 Well, you’re kind of getting into my next question because I was going to ask you if it’s hereditary at all, where if someone’s parent or grandparent or somewhere along their family line had Parkinson’s, does that necessarily make that individual more susceptible to that? Is there any link in it being hereditary? Speaker 3 There is some familial hereditary connection. And it accounts for a small percentage. Again, not a doctor, so I wouldn’t necessarily want to give those types of statistics. But I have met brothers who have Parkinson’s and mother daughters and different things of that nature. But staying active, taking good care of yourself are great ways to hopefully combat. Speaker 1 Well, you say take care of yourself. I mean, are there preventative measures that one can take to it? Maybe at least lessen the possibility that they would be inflicted by it. Speaker 3 I think that staying active with a great exercise routine, eating healthy, anti-inflammatory diet are recommended. And let’s see, I mean, I think that you should talk to your doctor and, you know, have regular contact with your doctor if there are small signs in the beginning to get connected with that neurologist and movement disorder quickly, because we often hear some people take one, three, even five years to get that diagnosis despite the onset of symptoms. So, you know, Parkinson’s, a lot of people think about it as, oh, that’s the tremor, that’s the shake, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Speaker 3 You know, there’s the motor symptoms that come along with Parkinson’s disease, And then there’s the non-motor symptoms. So we want to raise awareness. And we do that, you know, through the educational programs, the support, the wellness programs we promote all here, you know, with APDA. Speaker 1 So let’s talk about those small signs that you had mentioned, because you’re right. I mean, I can imagine that you just go from zero to 100 overnight as far as, you know, getting shakes, you know, and things like that, which is sadly, I mean, that’s the thing that people most associate with Parkinson’s. When they start shaking, it’s like, oh, they got Parkinson’s. But really, there’s, and I’m glad that you brought this up, there’s got to be signs that lead to that, you know, to that stage of Parkinson’s, right? What should we be looking for in either our elder family members or even, depending on who’s listening to this, even ourselves? If someone’s sitting on the fence going, I don’t know, is this Parkinson’s or is this nervous? What should people be looking for? Speaker 3 So, I mean, tremors is one thing that people often look for. It could be just the tremor in a finger, in their foot. It typically is on one side of the body. Or on the other hand, you can have stiffness, rigidity, slow movement, a shuffling gait. Speaker 3 I’m sure Siobhan and I working with seniors all the time, we see different gait patterns, the way people walk in the hallways at the senior communities. And, you know, sometimes whether it’s do they need some physical therapy, maybe their physical therapist would pick up on something. So keeping an eye on how their balance is. Speaker 3 Do they have posture instability? So if you start to see those things, you definitely want to talk to your primary care physician or get with a neurologist. They are obviously trained to diagnose Parkinson’s disease in an early case. Speaker 3 And sometimes they can refer you to a different type of scan that may see the lack of a brain chemical called dopamine, which is really where Parkinson’s comes from. Speaker 1 And there’s no cure for this, right? Speaker 3 Unfortunately not. Speaker 1 But it can be treated. It can be treated with medications to curb some of this. Speaker 3 And then also, sorry, go ahead. But, you know, activity and exercise are just as important as the medications that our Parkinson’s patients take. So we really promote that as well. Speaker 2 And I think that aren’t there other interventions too, like where you can have like a cochlea implants, if I can say that word, and stuff like that? Isn’t there other things that can be done if you’re younger or if you catch it early? Speaker 3 Yep. Actually, a colleague friend of mine recently had the deep brain stimulation or DBS implanted. And it’s a pretty intense surgery where they kind of almost have a pacemaker in the chest wall and leads or electrodes that are placed in the brain. Speaker 3 And it connects and has a pulse generator, and it can be programmed to help really control those motor symptoms. So it’s a really remarkable development, the deep brain stimulation. I’ve known people who’ve had it for 15 years, and it makes such an impact on their life. Speaker 3 However, it’s often, it doesn’t replace medication. It maybe will make your medication dosage not be so, maybe instead of taking three pills three times a day, you may be able to take one pill twice a day. So you work with your movement disorder specialist to figure out the right cocktail approach for you. Speaker 3 You know, if you meet somebody with Parkinson’s, they often want to compare notes as to what medications they are taking or what are you taking. It’s really customized for each person. You know, I say if you’ve met someone with Parkinson’s, great, you’ve met one person with Parkinson’s because it is so specialized from person to person, what their experience is, much like snowflakes, much like dementia care. Speaker 3 You know, we see that the brain is so intricate and, you know, how it presents a neurological disease is different person to person. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community, centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning is the program director for the Connecticut chapter of the American Parkinson’s Disease Association, Holly Seymour. Holly, what are some of the services that you offer? Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, we offer some wonderful resources, Program director, as the program director, my phone number is posted on the website. If our community has a need to reach out directly with questions, need for resources and suggestions on available services in their area, and more. And APD also publishes over 40 different publications that they can download and print, regular webinars. Speaker 3 And it really helps those with Parkinson’s, their care partners, friends, family, and healthcare professionals understand Parkinson’s care. even more. And we also offer exercise and wellness programs. We have a great list of local exercise classes that are beneficial, such as boxing, tai chi, yoga, dancing, and as we mentioned earlier, ping pong. And our website breaks it down throughout the state by town, and you can figure out which program that interests you is closest to your home. We also offer virtual programs. Speaker 3 I must add that our Connecticut board member and physical therapist, Tom Atwood, hosts a virtual class on Tuesday afternoons called Big Time. So those are great for the Parkinson’s community to make the most of their movements, which often, as Parkinson’s progresses, their movements become smaller. So it really pushes them to have bigger movements. Speaker 3 And by exaggerating their movements, they become kind of an average-sized movement. So we also even offer fitness training for fitness and health and wellness professionals, just so that that sector can be more familiar with Parkinson’s and how they can safely and effectively work with the Parkinson’s community. Speaker 1 I’m just amazed at the amount of work that you’re able to do. Do you have partnerships at all? Yeah. I know you offer support groups, and it sounds like you have a wealth of resources, but are you partnered with any other organizations? Speaker 3 We align ourselves with other Parkinson’s nonprofits to do research and produce publications. So we really have to link arms with our community partners to provide the support to people. You know, we have 16 support groups with another one starting in April. Speaker 3 So some of those support groups are hosted at local churches. Some of them are at senior living communities or community or senior centers. And we can’t do what we do without the volunteers that volunteer their time and expertise to host those support groups. Speaker 3 Because, again, as a program director, I only host one support group. But we have a host of professionals throughout the state that are dedicated to helping the Parkinson’s community. And we can’t do it without them, you know, and it makes such a difference. Speaker 1 Holly, tell us about your Yellow Dot program. Speaker 3 Yeah, I would love to. Our Yellow Dot program is not a part, an APDA-specific program. It’s actually a national triad program where they promote that seniors with a health care disorder such as Parkinson’s or something else might want to place that yellow sticker in their back rear car window. Speaker 3 and it would alert the emergency personnel, police, EMT, that the driver has important medical information that they need to look at during that stop. So whether it be, hey, this person has a caregiver that you need to contact, or they have Parkinson’s and these are their medications that they take. because oftentimes, God forbid they have to go to the hospital, they may miss a dose of their normally structured Parkinson’s medications, and that can make a big impact on their symptoms and care needs. Speaker 3 So we want them to know, you know, by taking a look at a simple card that is in their glove box, along with their license and registration and insurance information, It’s important that they know how they need to care for that person during that emergency stop. Speaker 1 I would love for you to take a few minutes and talk about some upcoming events. When I say upcoming, I mean, they’re both taking place this month, in the month of April. And in different areas of the state, which is really cool. Speaker 1 So let’s go in order. I believe you’ve got an art show coming up. Tell us all about that and where it’s going to be held. Speaker 3 Yeah, so first I’ll say that April is Parkinson’s Awareness Month. So that is really a big focus as to why we jam-pack April with a lot of great programs to bring awareness to Parkinson’s. So this Parkinson’s Artisan Show is a community grant from APDA supporting this art show. And it’s showcasing Parkinson’s artisans that reside locally. Speaker 3 It’s being held at the Friends Gallery at the South Windsor Public Library from April 1st to the 22nd. And, you know, it’s so great. These artists are showing their resilience and creating beautiful art ranging from photography, painting, egg carving. Speaker 3 It’s going to be incredible. And I have to credit an APDA Young Onset Support Group member, Jennifer Crowder, for planning and executing this art show. She is an artist. Speaker 3 She has young onset Parkinson’s disease. And at 46, she is creating beautiful art and being such a testament to the optimism and resilience that comes with Parkinson’s. Speaker 1 So the Parkinson’s Artisan Art Show, April 1st through the 22nd. It’s already underway. South Windsor Public Library, 1550 Sullivan Avenue in South Windsor. And people, they can just, do they need to make a reservation? Reservation, yes. Speaker 3 No, they can just attend the art show. It’s in the upstairs art gallery. And there’s a guest book to sign in. We’ll have fun facts to educate the public about Parkinson’s. So they can drop in any time during the library’s normal business hour. Speaker 1 All right, you’ve got another event in another part of the state, right? Speaker 3 Also coming up. So we’re going down to Fairfield now for our annual Parkinson’s Symposium. On April 15th, we’re hosting an incredible day of educational presentations. Speaker 3 We have Dr. Veronica Santini from Yale School of Medicine, Dr. Duarte Machado from Hartford HealthCare, and Dr. Bernardo Rodriguez from UConn Health. So the three of them are each doing an hour-long presentation on special topics related to Parkinson’s. And then we have a panel event where the audience can ask the panel anything. So it’ll be a really great opportunity to ask those burning questions. Speaker 3 We have a physician. We have caregivers. We have a facilitator from a support group all on that panel, a person living with Parkinson’s. And I think it’s going to be a really great way to connect the community. Speaker 3 And then, of course, we have great sponsors, APDA swag. Lunch is going to be served and being held at the Fairfield Woods Middle School Auditorium. Speaker 1 There we go. That’s what I was trying to get at. The time and location. Speaker 1 I know it’s on Saturday, April 15th. Tax day, my friends. What better way to get your mind off of tax day than to head on over to the annual Parkinson’s Symposium. Speaker 1 But it’s going to be in Fairfield. Where? At Fairfield? Speaker 1 Is it middle school? Fairfield Woods Middle School. Speaker 3 And it’s registry or check-in starts at 9 a.m. And then the program starts at 10 a.m. and they go till three in the afternoon. So we’re really excited. You can go to our website to register. Speaker 3 And that’s at apdaparkinson.org slash ct. And we’re taking registrations. We’ve had a great response to this event. Speaker 3 In previous, last year we had an event in Hartford. So it’s nice to be able to bring our symposium to a different part of the state. And that’s our goal is to kind of change up locations so that different people can attend. Speaker 1 I’m sorry, I’ve got to wrap this up. I just want you to give your website one more time. Speaker 3 Sure. It’s www.apdaparkinson.org. And if I may, we have a great Optimism Walk in May. So hopefully you’ll check out our website. We’ll do that. Speaker 1 Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. Those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care, and a whole lot more charming cottages with a true neighborhood feel. Speaker 1 They’re all available to rent adjacent to the main building where those who need more assistance reside. Please visit AveryHeights.org or call 860-953-1201. Again, that’s 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. Speaker 1 And I want to thank our guest, Holly Seymour, Program Director for the Connecticut Chapter of the Connecticut American Parkinson’s Disease Association. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thanks so much for listening. Speaker 1 Until next time, have a good one, everybody. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Lisa bravely has written her book: “Oh Hello Alzheimer’s” to inform and empower others who are caring for loved ones coping with this difficult illness. Her book is full of helpful tips and solution. It bravely goes deep into many difficult aspects of caregiving while giving her reader a truly candid and intimate glimpse into her marriage and history with Peter. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody, it’s time for your next chapter of production of the Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Now this show is dedicated to empowering older adults with helpful resources, ideas, inspiration, tips to encourage them on their life’s journey. Our production is also dedicated to the younger generation so they can better understand how to develop greater communication and enjoyment for those elders in their community. Speaker 1 Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan is a senior living specialist over at the Heights. Good to see you. Speaker 1 Good morning, Siobhan. Good to see you. How was your week? Speaker 1 My week was awesome. Of course it is. You know, every time I ask you that question, it’s always awesome. Speaker 1 I got to start hanging out with you. I want awesome looks. Speaker 2 I do. I went to go see Ant-Man and the Wasp. Really good. Speaker 1 Oh, that’s out already. Ooh, I haven’t heard that yet from my little guy. Speaker 2 Supposedly this is phase five for the whole Marvel universe, and it’s pretty cool. Speaker 1 Did you see the, I think it came out about a year ago, the Spider-Man that came out a year ago? Yes, yes. Speaker 2 Is that Far From Home or Welcome Back Home? Yes, I did. I was great. Yes. Well, this is really good, too. Speaker 1 And the Spider-Man, didn’t they have all the actors who portrayed Spider-Man? Speaker 2 Yes, that’s what made it really good. Yeah, wasn’t that really awesome? And actually, my favorite, and I don’t know his actor name, but the second one, the one with the black hair, that’s my favorite, actually. Speaker 1 Is that Christian Bale? Andrew Garfield. Oh, you know, Andrew Garfield is the one right now, I think. Speaker 1 He’s the new, no? There’s already a new Spider-Man? Oh, my goodness. Speaker 2 Yeah, no, the new one’s the younger kid, yeah. But I like the middle one, thank you. Speaker 1 What is it? Tom Holland. You can hear Jimmy J, the producer in the background. Speaker 1 See, I don’t know him. In fact, I’ll have to confess, it’s the only Spider-Man movie I’ve ever seen. But I did know. Speaker 1 I was aware of the other. Let me tell you this. Speaker 2 What? Speaker 1 I’ve never seen it. Speaker 2 I think that was like three. Spider-Man 3. Speaker 1 I’ve never even seen a Batman movie. Speaker 2 I thought you were going to say you didn’t see the other movie. And if you do, I have to leave. And I’ll come back when you’ve seen them all. Speaker 2 I’m serious. Lisa and I will leave. Bye. Speaker 1 I may have seen one. And the last, like, for me, Superman, it will always be Christopher Reeve. Superman. I know. Speaker 2 Christopher, what? Where are you? Speaker 1 I’m 53 years old here. What do you expect? Speaker 2 I’m older than you, and I would never quote that I expect Superman. I didn’t say George Reeves. Speaker 1 At least I didn’t say that. Speaker 2 I didn’t say Adam West. I thought I was going to say Adam West, yes. Well, those are really funny, though. Speaker 2 Remember Pam? Yeah. Those were hysterical. Speaker 2 Yeah, with the graphics on it. Yes, yes. Of course. Speaker 2 Those are the best, yeah. Speaker 1 But somebody, I saw a commercial. Was it during the Super Bowl? It was just recently. Speaker 1 Or the Daytona 500 or whatever. I thought I saw Michael Keaton. Is he… Speaker 1 Oh, is he coming back? He’s coming back as Batman. Speaker 2 He was good as Batman. Speaker 1 All right, before we go on, really quickly. Who’s all about that? There was Michael Keaton. Speaker 2 See, I’m a Marvel girl. Speaker 1 George Clooney. Speaker 2 So I can’t help… Oh, and then Ben Affleck. Speaker 1 Ben Affleck? Yeah. Speaker 2 And the guy from… Speaker 1 I didn’t know that. Speaker 2 Oh, gosh. The guy, Christian… What’s his name? Speaker 2 Christian Bale. Christian Bale, but the other one. The one that… Speaker 2 Val Kilmer. Speaker 1 Oh, Val Kilmer. Yes. Speaker 2 Right. Speaker 1 Look at this. Is that it? Speaker 2 The one with the vampire movie. He’s one, too. Speaker 1 The vampire movie? Interview with a vampire? Speaker 2 He was just the… Speaker 1 No. Speaker 2 He’s the latest one. I can’t think of his name. Good Lord. Speaker 1 Now we’re going to get phone calls and emails. Speaker 2 I know, but he was. He was just it, too. He just played Batman. Speaker 1 Oh, the latest… Speaker 2 The last one, yeah. Speaker 1 I’m wrong. Speaker 2 Vampire movies. Speaker 1 You don’t know what I’m saying? Speaker 2 Speaking of… We’ve got a guest here this morning. Speaker 1 Why don’t we… What’s our topic today? I know, right? She’s like, I don’t know anything about this. Why don’t you introduce our guests and we’ll get into our topic of discussion. Speaker 2 All right, these are Marvel first. We have to start there. Speaker 3 Oh, Marvel. Speaker 2 Okay, good. See, now I’m with you. Speaker 3 Sure. I’m with you on that. Speaker 2 So this is the wonderful Lisa Marshall. She wrote an incredible book. I think I can hold it up. Speaker 2 Can I hold it up? This is called Oh, Hello, Alzheimer’s. And it’s an incredible story. I actually had the great pleasure of reading it. Speaker 2 And I’m looking forward to having her actually come to our community at the Heights to meet with some of our residents and maybe to speak at our caregiver support group. All the time we have, unfortunately, folks that kind of face what she faced and faced it amazingly with grace and dignity. And what I always love is someone who takes that pain and makes it into something amazing to help other people. Speaker 2 So I’m very honored to meet you. Speaker 1 Thank you so much. Thanks for being here. You know, I just want to piggyback on that last statement because quite often, regardless of the situation, you know, you sit there and say, what good can come of this? Speaker 1 And you sit there and say to yourself, nothing, no good, no good. How can any good come from this? But the truth of the matter is there’s a book here that was written by our guest this morning. Speaker 1 And while it’s probably a book she never thought she would ever write or even ever wanted to write, if there’s somebody that can take something away by reading this book and help them, then, look, I’m not here to sugarcoat any of what you had to endure with your loss, But at least it’s a tiny smidgen consolation of knowing something slightly did, you know, favorable, did come out of this. Tell me a little bit about your husband, Peter. I’m a little familiar myself of your background, but maybe for the listeners here, just hearing this for the very first time before he became ill and maybe the history of your relationship, if you don’t mind. Speaker 3 Sure, sure. So we met in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, where I grew up. Peter grew up here in Connecticut. Speaker 3 And so we were neighbors, married to different people. We were together for five years or, you know, neighbors for five years. And then Peter got offered a job in Hartford. Speaker 3 And so he moved away with his family. And I stayed in Harrisburg. We lost connection. Speaker 3 We didn’t talk for a long time. And then we reconnected later. When we reconnected, we were both divorced. Speaker 3 And so we were 326 miles apart and began a romantic relationship, which lasted eight years long distance. Speaker 2 So every other weekend we would drive. Speaker 3 Yeah, we had a beautiful connection. And so that’s how we met. And then eventually in 2009, when my last child went to college, I sold my house and transferred to Hartford. And we got married and lived happily ever after until we didn’t. Speaker 1 You don’t hear too often people moving into Connecticut from out of state, but that’s a conversation for another day. Tell me about maybe your journey into the world of Alzheimer’s and really the tough decision that I’m sure you had that you were pressed upon in order to write this book. It’s entitled Oh Hello, Alzheimer’s. Where did you get the title? Speaker 1 And tell me about your journey to writing this book. Have you ever authored anything before? Or was this a book that was always inside you that wanted to come out? Speaker 3 I was a co-author in a Chicken Soup for the Soul book. Yeah, Navigating Eldercare and Dementia. So that was my first kind of dipping my toe in. Speaker 3 And then I wrote the book. But the title came from, I author an international blog by the same title, Oh, Hello to Alzheimer’s. And it just came to me because who expects that when you’re 53 years old to get handed a death sentence? You know, an Alzheimer’s diagnosis so young. Speaker 3 So I was like, oh, hello, Alzheimer’s. Now I need to do some research because I literally knew nothing about it. Speaker 1 This may be a tough question, but I’m going to ask anyhow. Let’s go back to the very onset of discovering that your husband had some memory loss. Because, and I’m just going to shoot from the hip here. Speaker 1 It can be, and don’t misinterpret this, it can be kind of funny at first. You know, it’s like, you know, you, you know, you never you could always remember that your childhood things. You could tell me what you did in your senior year in high school, but you can’t tell me, you know, which what you had for dinner last night. Speaker 1 And we’re not even we’re just being goofy, not even realizing that there’s something going on here. So when did you first realize that your husband started to have some memory loss? Speaker 3 You know, it’s the things that we do as we get older. We walk into a room and we think, why did I come in this room? Or you forget your keys. Speaker 3 You go out to the car, you don’t have your keys. You forget your wallet. All those things that you can just explain away, right? Speaker 3 That’s how it started. And then it progressed to he was losing his bank of words and his vocabulary. So he would start to describe things rather than use the word. Speaker 3 So, you know, the thing we get on when we go to visit our son and take our, you know, luggage, He was describing the word airplane, but he had lost that word. So that was happening more and more often. But we were at a time where we were planning to retire early. Speaker 3 Our goal and our sights were set on the age of 60. Speaker 1 Sure. Speaker 3 Right? And so we thought we had everything in line. And then at 53, we were handed the diagnosis. Speaker 3 So the way that it transpired for me to take him to the doctor was friends and family started to notice. And they would pull me aside. You know, and these are the brave friends who are kind enough to say something’s going on here. Speaker 3 And so now I was accountable. I was accountable to Peter and to myself to get a diagnosis. Speaker 1 Lisa, I got a follow up question to that, but I want to move this over to Siobhan right now. With memory care that The Heights offers, is her story pretty typical? Is that normally how this happens where, you know, people are forgetting their keys or, you know, where did I put my phone? Or, you know, and then verbiage, word, language. Speaker 2 Yeah, most definitely. Is that what you see? Yeah, and I think, too, we were talking before the show that, unfortunately, we have a lot of that husband and wives, too, where, unfortunately, that spouse has to go into our memory care. Speaker 2 And it’s sad. We’ve had over the last, after Christmas, we’ve had three of those. And they’re fairly young. Speaker 2 I mean, they’re like in their 70s. One of them was a person that was part of a big law firm. And so it’s really sad to see. And it’s, you know, you’re in your office and you’re, you know, talking about going into memory care and I’m doing my normal, you know, kind of explanation. Speaker 2 And unfortunately, that person just breaks down. And that’s when I just kind of clear my desk and clear it and just kind of just spend that time. And unfortunately, I’ve had to do that like, you know, a couple of times within the last couple of months. Speaker 2 And it’s hard. And it’s hard to the day of as well. We just had that actually this week, the day of where she had to drop him off. Speaker 2 And, you know, she lives in our cottages and then she had to have them. And, you know, that’s really hard. And luckily we have our caregiver support group to help folks like that. Speaker 1 Lisa, when you initiated this conversation with your husband, I can only imagine how emotional it was. But were you met with some pushback from your husband by saying, oh, come on, I think you’re overreacting. Yes. Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, how it was this. And I’m sorry for it. If I’m delving too deep here, if it’s too personal, let me know. Speaker 1 And I think there’s other questions I have for you. But the only thing I have in my mind is like an intervention. Were there other family members, friends, were they there? Speaker 1 Or was this more one-on-one? And did this start an argument where what in the world are you saying? Speaker 3 How did this go down? That’s a lot of questions, but I’ll try to remember them all. I know. Speaker 3 First of all, we did not argue very much at all. Peter was of the belief that he would say constantly, happy wife, happy life. So, no, there was no arguing. Speaker 3 If I said something’s wrong, you’re going to the doctor. He was like, okay. And he said to his PCP, she thinks there’s something wrong. Speaker 1 Well, nobody likes going to the doctor, especially being told they’ve got to go to the doctor. Speaker 3 Right. So it wasn’t an intervention at all. It was just me loving Peter and taking good care of him. Speaker 1 Any pushback? Nothing at all? He was just so compliant with that guy. Speaker 1 Happy wife, happy life. I’ll go. But there wasn’t like, really? Speaker 1 Was he in agreement? Speaker 3 I think that he felt there was some things wrong with him as well. And even after the diagnosis, which was a year and some months later after we just went to our PCP, it was almost a year after that that he retired, quote unquote. And there was such a relief in him that he declined very swiftly. And I think he was just, he had this masquerade that he was trying to uphold and defend himself and pretend like there was nothing wrong. So much so that when he retired, it was just, he just breathed, you know. Speaker 1 Was the decline rapid? Speaker 3 Rapid. From diagnosis to death, three years and eight months. Speaker 2 I think with early onset, it moves faster. Speaker 1 fast. That was my next question for you, actually. Is this typical? I mean, because that sounds a little on the too quick side. Yeah, and it is sad Speaker 2 because it does happen very quickly. I just think of Speaker 1 Reagan. I read a lot of presidential biographies, autobiographies, and so on and so forth, and from the time that he announced that he had Alzheimer’s in the early 90s to the time that he passed away, I think that was 2004. I mean, a decade had gone by from the time that he announced it to the time that he had passed away. So I’m thinking sadly it’s a slow drawn out demise you’re telling me three years that sounds wow that sounds Speaker 3 extremely rapid right but to clarify so three years and eight months from diagnosis to death i got you a year before was the initial visit to the pcp and there were signs before those signs that we discussed about losing your phone wallet keys and things like that so i would say from the The very first sign, in hindsight, 8 to 10 years. Speaker 1 All right. And I guess that’s right on. Speaker 2 And people do go undiagnosed for a while. Many people, when they come into the community to have a tour, they sit down and I’m like, well, do you have a diagnosis? And a lot of times there’s that fear of going to the doctor. And I tell them, you know, you have to get a diagnosis so we know how to help because you don’t know how to help if you don’t do that. So I’ll send them to UConn or someplace like that to, you know, get the proper care that they need. Speaker 1 What are the signs? Is it usually language or is it, and I don’t want to speak so, you know, typical. Oh, I forgot my keys. Speaker 1 I mean, anybody can forget their keys. That doesn’t mean you’ve got Alzheimer’s. It doesn’t even mean you’ve got memory loss. We’re all inundated with so many different outside, you know, media and so many things. Speaker 1 So many, more now, I think, than ever trying to grab and fight for our attention. But how do you discern what’s just a normal, I’m being forgetful, and something that may be more serious? What are the signs that we should be looking for? Speaker 3 I feel like it’s instinctual. You know, if you feel like something’s wrong, then something’s wrong. But for Peter, it was a lot of his short-term memory. Speaker 3 And I would find him saying, oh, right, right, right, right, right, you know, often. Because I would have to remind him or say, oh, we’re going here. Or, you know, this person did this. Speaker 3 And just repeating myself a lot. And he wouldn’t remember things that we had on our schedule or people who I was talking about. Speaker 1 So he acknowledged a lot of this. Speaker 3 Yes. In agreement with you. Yes. Speaker 1 Did he show concern? Speaker 3 Yes. He went through a very emotional period of six to 12 months, I would say, where he was constantly crying just because he could see what was happening. He knew what was happening, and he was very sad for us. Speaker 1 How did this affect you? Speaker 3 Oh, I was, wow, completely grief-stricken because the one thing that people don’t understand about the caregiver is that she or he is already mourning. the loss of their loved one because we’re caring for a body, a vessel. And the person that we married or the person that we love is no longer there because they’re just dissipating in front of our eyes. So it’s ambiguous grief. And we do a lot of the grieving before, you know, their bodies die. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, Senior Living, presented to you by The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. And our guest this morning is Lisa Marshall, who has authored a book, Oh, Hello, Alzheimer’s, A Caregiver’s Journey of Love. You could pick this book up, I would presume, wherever you normally or typically purchase books, whether it’s Amazon or Barnes & Noble or whatnot. Lisa, how about maybe some tips that you can give to others who suspect that a loved one may have some memory loss issues? Speaker 3 Yeah, I think you need to start with your primary care physician. That’s the very first step. You know, and typically, I know when we went to Peter’s doctor, I wanted three things. Speaker 3 I wanted an MRI because I thought it was something, you know, not Alzheimer’s. And I wanted some blood work. And I wanted a neuro consult. And so we did walk out of there with those three things. Speaker 3 And that’s really what started the ball rolling for us. Speaker 1 Alzheimer’s is a form of dementia. And I think, and maybe you can both speak to this, quite often in the vernacular, people just use them interchangeably. Oh, they must have Alzheimer’s. Remember years ago? Speaker 1 Oh, it was senile. You’re going senile. That’s a word. Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Many years back. Right. Speaker 1 Well, I think our generation can identify with that term because it was used constantly as well. But going back to the term of the diagnosis, if you will, of Alzheimer’s, it’s one form of dementia. But truth be told is that it’s under really the under the umbrella of dementia. Speaker 1 There’s other forms of dementia as well. What specifically are the qualifications of Alzheimer’s and how do we differentiate that from other forms of dementia? Speaker 3 I think the standard is the plaques that are tangling the brain, amyloid and tau proteins, I think. I’m no doctor, of course. Speaker 1 But you’ve been educated a lot more with this than surely I have. Speaker 3 Yeah. And one of the tests that they did when we went to Peter’s neurologist was they did a spinal tap to check the levels of those two proteins. And they were in alignment with the diagnosis. And that’s how they did come to the diagnosis of Alzheimer’s. Yeah. Speaker 1 at the Heights, do you notice a difference between those who have Alzheimer’s and those who have Speaker 2 a different form of dementia? Yeah. I mean, sometimes I think, and again, I’m not a medical either, but either like Lewy body or those types of dementias, I know that there’s a lot more behaviors. You know, people are, they really lose their inhibitions and they kind of will, you know, sometimes someone who never swore in their life maybe, and all of a sudden mom is just like a sailor. Right. It’s kind of, yeah. Or, you know, so that’s tough for people where they’re throwing things or they’re just angry. And that happens a lot of times where, like you were saying, the hardening of certain parts of the brain, it becomes the behaviors are a lot more intense Speaker 1 than with others. Are there effective treatments? I mean, there’s no cure. We know that. But what can the medical society or families even, what can we do to make sure that, you know, the individual is as comfortable and that they’re being at least somewhat attended to. Speaker 2 Yeah, I think for me, you know, it’s so sad to watch. We had one woman, unfortunately, it was brought on because of alcohol use for substance abuse. Sometimes people get dementia from that. And it just was so sad to watch. I mean, she could not sit still. Speaker 2 It was probably the saddest thing I ever saw. And she was the sweetest lady. I remember she was just walking and walking and at one point you know every once in a while I would stop her and walk with her and she just that calmed her down but there was just no way to calm her down and unfortunately I mean she wouldn’t she couldn’t even sit down to eat I mean she was that nervous and that just just agitated um and unfortunately you know she ended up passing but to to comfort someone like that is very it’s just very challenging and it’s very sad um to watch and to see for me Speaker 3 it’s just joining their journey wherever they are because their perception is typically skewed. And to argue or say, no, no, no, it’s not Monday, it’s Tuesday, or no, that’s not your sister, that’s your mother. It’s just you’re only going to create stress and elevate agitation. So just joining them wherever they are, making them feel confident and safe is really so important. Speaker 2 I totally agree with that. That is the saddest thing to watch when, unfortunately, a caregiver is so frustrated with their loved one and they’re trying to convince them, you know, try to make them eat or try to convince them, you know, of the day. Remember, you used to like this or or when they’re trying to have them guess their name. Speaker 2 That is like one of the things I learned from some of the training is that, you know, you introduce yourself and introduce at work all the time. I’m introducing myself to the people and I’ll say, oh, you know, I’m Siobhan or I’m Siobhan. I’m the director of marketing. Speaker 2 And, you know, I might have done it yesterday, but it’s so important to introduce yourself. Speaker 1 Sometimes I think the family members are suffering more than the actual. Speaker 2 Yeah. Well, the loss, like she was saying, that grief starts early. And I think they are, you know, have some support groups for that as well, you know, because that grief doesn’t start. It starts at that diagnosis. Speaker 1 Are there. So then let’s. I want to take that further. Are there resources available for the for the early stages of diagnosis? Speaker 3 As far as medications. Speaker 1 Any resource that’s available. You mentioned groups. Yep. Speaker 1 There’s support groups. But I mean, yeah. Medications. Speaker 1 Is there anything? And what are they? Speaker 3 Sure. There’s support groups. There are daycare-type centers where people with Alzheimer’s can go and be in a safe community where they are led to different activities. Speaker 3 Peter went to one for a little while, as long as he could. But for the family, the family really desperately needs support. And it’s hard to convince the family that they do need the support. Speaker 1 I would imagine. I mean, it’s just… I don’t know what your background. Speaker 1 any background in caregiving, but oh my goodness, you have to learn to be a caregiver, you know, pretty much overnight. And if you weren’t a caregiver before, you have to certainly be one, you know, at that point in time. We’ve only got a few minutes left. Any advice, any advice that you can offer our listeners to not just how to stay positive, but, you know, maybe even in terms of the disease itself? You know, the disease is going to really wreck you. It is emotionally, Speaker 3 physically. I was never so exhausted in my life. But self-care is the most important thing. So if the caregiver is trying to provide care from an empty cup, they’re not going to be as kind and patient as they could be. So I developed four A’s. And this is just like my mantra. So A, you have to accept help when people ask you, what can I do? And secondly, you have to ask for help if no one’s helping you ask for what you need third articulate exactly what you need I need to go get a shower I need a nap I need to take a walk outside this house I need somebody to cook me a meal something that will help and support you I’m a very independent soul so I needed a fourth day and I thought maybe there were others that did too and so that’s the word actually so when someone would say to me can I help you with anything instead of saying no no no I’m good I made myself, I demanded that I use the word actually. So it helped me stay accountable. So can I help you with something actually? And I always had a list of things that I could just Speaker 1 ask for. In just a few seconds, Siobhan, how does a caregiver, a spouse at home know that it’s time for them to maybe move into a memory care unit at a senior living facility? Yeah, that’s a great Speaker 2 question. It’s exactly what she’s saying. When you had your cup is empty and it’s so important. Speaker 2 And that’s one of the things I love about the book is that she really emphasizes that the caregiver has to take care of themselves. So many times we see that caregiver, unfortunately, passing away or getting sick prior, you know, before the person that has Alzheimer’s or dementia. And then, you know, one of the things that’s always good to do is to go to that senior living community so that if they do, you know, unfortunately get diagnosed with something that’s terminal, they will get that support. Speaker 2 We just had back in December, we had a lovely couple and she went on hospice. She passed away. And now he is part of the community. Speaker 2 He has dementia and, you know, he’s living a great life. So I think that’s really important. That caregiver, take care of yourself. Speaker 1 Really quickly, in a minute or less, how therapeutic was it for you? Writing this book. Speaker 3 Extremely cathartic. There were days that I couldn’t write at all and days that I would write for eight hours. But it just spewed out of me sometimes. And I’ve read the book again several times. Speaker 1 Do you relive it every time that you read it? Speaker 3 I read it differently. And now I read it with joy and good memories, you know, as I’ve kind of done a lot of introspective healing. Speaker 1 I’ll bet. And finally, when a person reads this book, if there’s one thing that you hope that they take out of it, there’s a lot to remember in any book, really, that you read. But, boy, if someone says, you know what? You know what I took out from this book that really resonated with me? What would it be for this book? Speaker 3 Oh, that’s easy. So it’s find joy and have no regrets. Right there in my paper. Speaker 3 Yeah, she said that. Find joy, have no regrets. Find joy no matter what. Speaker 3 You know, those dishes in the sink are going to pile up, and those fur balls are going to float across your floor. You’re not going to miss those later, but you’re going to miss the hand that you’re holding. Speaker 1 How can people obtain this book really quickly? Speaker 3 Yep, on Amazon. They can go on and just search for Oh Hello Alzheimer’s in books or on my Facebook blog titled the same thing. Oh, hello, Alzheimer’s. They could buy autographed copies there. Speaker 1 Wonderful. The name of the book is Oh Hello Alzheimer’s, A Caregiver’s Journey of Love. The author of the book, our guest this morning, Lisa Marshall. Thank you for being with us. Speaker 3 Thank you so much. Speaker 1 Thank you. No, it’s absolutely essential. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly, The Heights Senior Living Specialist, Avery Heights, is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. Speaker 1 Those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care and a whole lot more. Visit AveryHeights.org or call 860-953-1201. Again, that’s 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. Speaker 1 So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. You will… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") ## [Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") September 8, 2023 The Heights at Avery Heights was honored to speak with Teepa Snow one of the world’s leading advocates and educators for anyone living with dementia… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's, Purpose, Inspiration & Positive Aging **Tags:** Alzheimer's, Caregiving, Dementia, Purpose & Meaning --- ### [How to Pay for Your Next Chapter – Senior Living: Part #3](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/how-to-pay-for-your-next-chapter-senior-living-part-3/) **Published:** May 19, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Long Term Care Insurance Family Solutions for Care. Wendy Rinehart Family Solutions for Care ,Co-Owner/Co-Founder explains how to obtain, use, and the do’s and don’ts for long term care insurance policy. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Hello again everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. And by the way, it’s never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter, well, we delve deep into topics that will improve the way that we think about aging, about senior living, and the retirement years. Speaker 1 Along with Siobhan Mattingly, she is the Heights Senior Living Specialist. I’m Gary Byron. Good to see you, Siobhan. Speaker 1 Good morning. Hey, good morning. How are you? Speaker 1 I’m very good. We look at you. You look very nice. Speaker 1 I try. No, you don’t. I think it comes natural to you. Speaker 2 How was your week? It was good. It was good. Speaker 2 You always say that. We’re planning. We’re planning for Memorial Day, actually, for our veterans. Speaker 2 Oh, right, right. A little ceremony. We have a kid or young adult from Sedgwick that’s going to be doing taps for us. Speaker 2 And our chaplain’s going to say a few words and our director. Speaker 1 Is it similar to when I was there on Veterans Day? No. Is there something similar to that? No. Do you do a lunch or do you do a – Speaker 2 Well, we’re going to do the ceremony. And then after the ceremony, we’ll have our social hours. So there will be family members there. Speaker 2 It’ll be a bigger social hour. Yeah. I think it’s going to be nice, though, especially the taps part. Speaker 2 That always gets to me. Speaker 1 How many people do you think will attend this? Speaker 2 We usually have. I mean, for happy hour, our social hour, we usually have about 60, 70 people. And then I’m sure, like, family members will come and so forth. Speaker 2 So our veterans, you know, support is very strong, especially with the families. They love it. I can’t believe we have, like, now we have close to, like, 35 veterans. Speaker 2 So it’s, yeah, yeah. We’re attracting more and more every day. Speaker 1 Memorial Day, though, is always much more sad because it’s more memorializing, obviously. Exactly. You know, those who made the ultimate sacrifice. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. Speaker 1 And it’s emotional. You could see it on the eye, you know, in the eyes of the veterans, you know, because they’ll recall somebody that they were close with who has since passed on either in active duty or or since maybe the last Memorial Day, you know. Speaker 2 Yeah. And that’s why when I used to work for hospice, they used to do a lot of work with folks, with veterans as that because there’s a lot of shame and guilt as well because why did i get sent home why did i survive and so there’s a lot that goes on there uh towards the end uh because obviously Speaker 1 you want people to resolve that and have a good quality death do people wear their uniform or or is that something that is part of their past they can no longer fit into yeah i don’t see even when Speaker 2 we have because we have the veterans wall and every other month we do a ceremony for the veterans uh and their families there and so forth and we don’t have so far we haven’t had anyone that kind of dressed up for that. But we get a good turnout for that, too. We had 75 people at the last one. Speaker 2 So basically, the person goes up on the veteran. Every other month, we put a different person up on the veteran’s wall. And whoever gets up there gets their bio done. They’re up there for two months. And then we do a ceremony for them with the family. So we have them say a few words. Bill says, our director says a few words. And then afterwards, everyone kind of goes up for dinner. Speaker 2 Yeah. Very nice. It is very nice, actually. And some of these guys haven’t been acknowledged for their service in years. And so it’s very heartfelt. There’s tears always and stuff like that. And it’s, Speaker 1 you know, it’s good. I mean, they served our country. Is this a large undertaking that you do every year? Or is this a lot of planning? For Memorial Day, this is actually the first time I, Speaker 2 I was there last year around Memorial Day, but this is the first time that I, because the veterans program, I got started back in last November, myself and the team. And so with the wall, That was the first piece of it. And so last year, I don’t believe they did really anything to acknowledge it, you know, because we just, you know, kicking off the veterans program. So this year will be the first year. But it’s, I mean, when you think about undertaking, it’s like, first of all, I love my job. So, and I love planning events. So it’s really not work. And this is something that is going to have strong meaning. So that adds to the, so I don’t really feel like, you know what I mean? Speaker 2 I feel like it’s something that needs to be done and something that, you know, we have to, you know. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, we can’t just kind of, I mean, this is a tough time for a lot of our veterans. Speaker 2 I mean, you know, we have a lot of times, too, people will have pictures of all their friends. Our last veteran that we acknowledged, he had a picture of himself with his crew. And it was probably at least, oh, my gosh, it had to be at least maybe 60 people in this picture. Speaker 2 They’re all in uniform. They were all on the base. you know how many of those people are still alive so you know it’s not just you know I’m a veteran and people passed away I mean this is just like you know this is something that you know they’re older and these these were their friends and probably several of them have passed away we’re also doing stuff with honor flight as well that’s where you go down to DC it’s usually the World War II vets Vietnam and Korea at this point and they get to go down to DC and go to all those memorials They fly them down. Speaker 2 They do a huge ceremony at the airport, and then they fly them down, like I said. Then they go down, and they get to see all the memorials. Then they have lunch, and then they do a ceremony, and then they have dinner, and then they come back, and sometimes they don’t come back. Speaker 2 And then when they get back, they have another welcoming, almost like think about you coming when they get back. And so probably a couple of our veterans, maybe two or three of our veterans, are going to be going down to that, which is really exciting. Alan’s going to go. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Yes, yeah. His birthday’s coming up in July. Speaker 2 He’s going to be 100. Yeah. God bless him. Speaker 2 So he’s excited. He’s going to go. And they get to go with like an escort, a family member. Speaker 2 So we’re doing a lot with that, too. So we’re trying to really, I mean. Speaker 1 You are busy. Speaker 2 Our veterans are super important to us. Speaker 1 I might not surprise that that’s a lot. Hey, I’m looking into our guests this morning. Yes. I’m pretty excited about this. Why don’t you take the liberty now to introduce her and how you guys became aware of one another? Speaker 2 Yeah. So I’m always, when I’m thinking of what to do for this show, I’m always just online, kind of like search and search and searching. And one of the biggest questions that I get, and we talked about this in the previous because we’re doing this four-part series on financial services, paying for senior living community. Speaker 2 And that is the biggest question that I get. I mean probably even on the phone, first question in the tour, you know, what if, what if, how do I pay for this? Well, the best thing that we always like to hear are two things. Speaker 2 One is veterans, which is going to be in our next part of the series. But the other one is they have a long-term care policy. When I hear that, I’m like, oh, like the lights come on. Speaker 2 It’s like a moment. And so I really wanted to have Ms. Wendy Reinhardt on. She’s from Family Solutions for Care. Speaker 2 And what they do is amazing to help people figure out these policies. And I think it’s really important to have her on. I know people have a ton of questions because even though you have the policy, there’s so much you need to know to kind of like get the benefits and so forth. Speaker 2 So I just wanted to have her on so she can kind of help folks out. Speaker 1 Well, good morning, Wendy. Welcome to the show. Speaker 3 Good morning. Very nice to be here. Speaker 1 We appreciate your time. Speaker 2 Very much appreciate you here. Speaker 1 Family Solutions for Care. Well, before I ask you about Family Solutions for Care and what kind of services that your company provides, tell me a little bit about yourself, your background, and how you got into this industry and where you are now. Speaker 3 Sure. Absolutely. Thank you. Speaker 3 And Siobhan, like you, I love my job. I love serving families. And if I might add, my father is a veteran, a Korean War, Korean conflict veteran, and he wears his Army hat every single day. Speaker 3 He unfortunately has advanced dementia, but every day he remembers his Army hat. So he’s very, very proud of his service. And Siobhan, you just gave me some great ideas for him for Monday. Speaker 3 So thank you. Speaker 2 Nice. Speaker 3 I love it. My background is I came from a family, obviously, of service. I worked in the American Red Cross as the executive director, so I have a not-for-profit background. Speaker 3 But out of the blue, someone called me to talk to me about selling long-term care insurance 25 years ago. And I thought about that for a minute, and I thought, well, as he described it, long-term care insurance sounded exciting because it would provide dignity and choices and peace of mind for families if they bought this policy, not to mention protecting all of their money. So I sold long-term care insurance for many years, and everything I do, I get passionate about it. Speaker 3 So I got passionate about it because I believed I was giving people choices and dignity. And then many years into selling long-term care insurance, I started having families go on claim, including my brother. My brother developed terminal cancer, and when I called the insurance company to get his claim approved, I realized that they will pay. They pay claims. Insurance companies will absolutely pay, but it’s not a cakewalk, and it comes at a time when the family is emotionally often overwhelmed. Speaker 3 There are a lot of moving parts. My brother was a young man. He died at 57 years old. Speaker 3 And if I had not known the ropes, known the industry, we would not have been able to get his long-term care policy to pay. So I do want to go on record and say long-term care insurance pays. It’s just one kind of insurance that’s kind of counting on. Speaker 3 It’s an emotionally unstable situation. So families don’t always realize everything that they’re up against when they’re trying to get their policies to pay. So what we do, and we started this over 12 years ago. Speaker 3 Once we went through an experience with just a little frustration with the insurance company and my brother, we started a company that became nationwide within our first month of being in business. So families are referred to us from all over, from a lot of communities, also from some people that work in the placement space, elder law attorneys. They refer us families that have long-term care insurance, and we spend time with every single family, which is quite a bit of people are referred to us every month. Speaker 3 We spend a long time talking with them about what’s going on health-wise with the policyholder. And then we ask them questions about their long-term care policy, or they send us a copy of their long-term care policy, or we call their insurance company together to ask questions about their long-term care policy. So our goal is to help a family get to the starting line, to help them understand exactly what is in their long-term care policy, exactly how their current health situation of the policyholder is going to affect the claim, and what exact steps they need to take in order to get every single dollar that the policyholder is entitled to. Speaker 3 Or sometimes our conversation is telling the family that it’s not quite time to file a claim. So our goal, our mission is to get them to the starting line so they’re not making financial decisions that are going to later on hurt them. if they are unprepared. Speaker 1 Sounds like you’re a guide in a way, an advisor or a guide. Speaker 3 You absolutely are a guide. Yeah. Yes. Speaker 3 I think that’s a perfect term for it. Here’s the problem, or here’s the challenge. I hate to really call it a problem because I still love long-term care insurance, but there are 400,000 varieties of these long-term care policies on the market. Speaker 3 So there used to be. So it’s complicated. There used to be 200 companies that sold these long-term care insurance policies. Speaker 3 Now, the industry has really transitioned. And so the number of insurance companies that sell long-term care insurance is now less than 10. And that’s not a bad thing. Speaker 3 It’s just there’s been sort of a straightening out of the industry. It used to be that there were primarily people would buy reimbursement policies, which were the old-fashioned kinds of long-term care insurance contracts where you would pay for an expense and then they would reimburse you. Over somewhere between 10 and 12 million of those policies have been sold. Speaker 3 But over the years, the industry has changed. So many of the big carriers got out of the long-term care market. John Hancock, Genworth, which was GE, which was Amex. Speaker 3 A lot of transitions. A lot of these big carriers got out of the traditional long-term care market. After 2008, the industry wasn’t quite as profitable as they thought it would be. Speaker 3 People lived longer. People were going on claim longer. And people didn’t drop their long-term care policies. Speaker 3 So a lot of the insurance companies said, okay, I don’t know if we can afford to sell it. sell these same products anymore. So now what’s happened is now there are a few companies that offer traditional policies, and I think the industry has gotten it right in terms of pricing. Speaker 3 They have a lot more actuarial data. But we also are seeing a lot of hybrid policies. So those are annuity-type products where people would pay in a chunk of money, and they can use it for life insurance. Speaker 3 They can use it for long-term care, either an annuity or a life insurance policy. They work very similarly to traditional long-term care policies. You have to meet the same kind of criteria in order to get them to pay. Speaker 3 But a lot of people like these hybrid-type products because they get to use the benefits one way or another, either for life insurance or for a long-term care event. Speaker 2 I think they’re more affordable, too. Sorry. That’s right. Go ahead. Right, Wendy, they’re more affordable that way? Speaker 3 Yes, they are a lot more affordable this way. And again, it depends on which policy you go with. You still can buy high-end policies that are more expensive, but you can buy traditional policies with a life insurance rider. They’re actually life insurance policies with a long-term care rider, to be fair. Speaker 1 I’m just curious as to the different types of policies, because I don’t need you to go over $400,000. But what are the more? I know, right? Speaker 1 We’ll continue this every morning for the next decade. Oh, yeah, really? But, I mean, there’s got to be more popular policies that people gravitate more towards. Speaker 1 What does it entail? What different types of policies are out there for people? Speaker 3 I’m going to talk about the traditional policies and how they work. So that’s the most common thing. And there are some commonalities between these policies, even though there’s 400,000 variations of them. Speaker 3 So a few things. Most policies have elimination periods or waiting periods. So this is whether it’s on a traditional policy or on a hybrid policy. Speaker 3 So elimination periods are sometimes they’re 30 days, sometimes they’re 90 days, sometimes they’re 100 days. You can think of these as waiting periods. So this is a waiting period or a time when the insurance company expects either you or Medicare or health insurance to pay up front. Speaker 3 And actually, these policies were designed so that these waiting periods were, in fact, covered a great deal by Medicare. So oftentimes, and this is something I’d like people to understand, if you have an elimination period on your long-term care policy and you have had care recently, maybe in the form of rehab care or OT or PT or speech therapy, that therapy or those rehab days probably can be counted towards your elimination period. So understanding elimination periods is a huge part of understanding how to get your long-term care policy to work. Speaker 3 And then some of the commonalities in terms of benefit triggers are most policies, and I will be fair about this, most policies say we will start paying benefits once you need assistance with two out of six activities of daily living. Now, that list of six is bathing, dressing, toileting, transferring, continence, and eating. Now, what I want to point out is that list of activities of daily living is not the same with every single policy. Speaker 3 But it is a uniform list for a lot of policies, probably 80% of the market. Now, here’s the interpretation difference in what we talk with families about. Some policies will pay once you need just a little bit of supervision. Speaker 3 It’s called standby assistance. So a lot of people think they have to wait until they are completely incapacitated to utilize their long-term care policies. But if your policy says it will pay once you need standby assistance, that means that you can activate the policy sooner and actually use the policy the way that it was designed, which is to provide dignity, provide choice, give you peace of mind, protect your assets. Speaker 3 So standby assistance means that you’re still doing your things. You still can bathe. You still can toilet. Speaker 3 You still can dress yourself. But gosh, it would be better for you if you had someone near you so that you could call out for help in case you get in trouble. And it could be simple things like dressing could be someone needs help putting their compression hose on. Speaker 3 Or they just need help when they go out to put their shoes and socks on. So standby assistance is a huge differentiator between a policy that pays for only hands-on assistance. There are policies that pay for only hands-on assistance, and those, to be fair, are a little more restrictive. Speaker 3 So if someone is looking at buying a long-term care policy in the future, you want a policy that uses the two out of six activities of daily living criteria, and you want a policy policy that defines assistance as stand by. And I hope that made sense. Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah. Folks, you’re listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. Speaker 1 I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning, Wendy Reinhardt from Family Solutions for Care. She’s a co-owner, co-founder. Speaker 1 Check them out online at familysolutionsforcare.com. And I’m going to give you her number and I’ll repeat that website more towards the end of the show. I’m curious because we’ve only got a few minutes left. Speaker 1 And one of the questions that I had really kind of from the get go is how this all works. How does long term care insurance, how does it work? I mean, what’s the first step that you take? Speaker 1 And really, what are the questions that somebody should be asking someone like you? Speaker 3 Well, the first thing they would, you know, obviously we would like them to call us, and we do have a toll-free number of 844-858-4500 so that we can help them understand what they’ve got in a policy. What we’ve learned is that the first thing that happens is, for instance, in my father’s case, my father had a health issue, we immediately had to make a decision, and he was placed into a facility pretty quickly. And we find that that is fairly common. Speaker 3 People don’t always have the luxury of planning for their move-in. So oftentimes we get families calling us that have already moved in because there’s already been a health care event that has changed. But whether they’ve already moved in or they’re considering moving in, call us. Speaker 3 We honestly, we will help you figure out when the right time to file a claim is, whether or not this is the right time to file a claim. We talk to a lot of families, and once we explain to them, You need to be asking for and receiving help with your activities of daily living. Once we walk through that with that policyholder and their family, they oftentimes make a decision about whether or not they want to use the policy. Speaker 3 So the key is, number one, never file a claim with a long-term care policy unless you have a full copy of your long-term care policy. So again, never file a claim unless you have a complete copy of your long-term care policy because otherwise you are shooting yourself in the foot. And I would recommend not even calling the claim department of the insurance company until you have a copy of your long-term care policy, which means if you don’t call us and let us help you, then at the very least call the customer service department of the insurance company and ask for a copy of your policy before you file a claim. Speaker 3 But when you think at all that you’re going to have a claim, you’ve got to get a copy of the policy. And you have to sit down and think about, are you ready and willing to accept help with your activities of daily living? And sometimes those activities of daily living are defined very harshly in the hands-on help. Speaker 3 And sometimes, again, like I said earlier, with standby assistance, we can activate these policies more quickly. And let me share with you that the policies can pay in assisted living. They can pay for room and board. Speaker 3 They can pay for meal preparation and laundry service and medication management. So in any setting, these policies are generally pretty broad. They will pay for a little socialization, doctor’s appointments, informal care, as long as the policyholder themselves will accept consistent assistance with their activities of daily living. Speaker 3 And they only have to meet the criteria for two of them. But when we are talking with them, when our team is talking with them, we can help them ascertain whether or not they’re even close to being able to access a claim. But more often than not, we encourage them to use their policies. Speaker 3 People often think they need to wait for an absolute rainy day and don’t want to use their policies too soon. One thing I will tell you is that most policies do not have a time limit cap. They have a cap in terms of total benefit dollars. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 3 So they’re not capped at three or four years. They’re capped at how much money is in their benefit pool. Speaker 1 So for folks who don’t have a policy, number one, how can they get one? Number two, what age should you have a policy in place by? Speaker 3 Excellent question. Most people buy policies between the ages of 45 and 70 currently. You have to be relatively healthy to buy traditional long-term care insurance. Speaker 3 Now, we have seen there are carriers that, of course, sell policies for people that are older than 70, but oftentimes, but in our 60s and 70s, we develop health issues that prohibit us from buying long-term care insurance. But that is where the underwriting for life insurance products with a long-term care writer is slightly easier. So I would recommend if you’re 65 to 70 or older, maybe consider looking at a life insurance policy with a long-term care writer. Speaker 3 They tend to have better, a little easier underwriting. Speaker 1 You know, I’m running out of time. I’ve got about three minutes remaining, but there’s one important question that I wanted to ask you before we let you go. And it really just comes down to offering maybe some tips, some buyer beware tips, some advice for people who are looking to buy long-term care insurance. Speaker 1 Maybe you can take both those on in the next two and a half to three minutes. What are some advice that you can give? And what are some buyer beware scams or tips that you can? Speaker 3 Absolutely. So the first thing I would say is shop reputable companies. Make sure that you’re dealing with a company that has an A rating. Speaker 3 Make sure that it’s a large enough company. It’s not a one-off company that’s just offering this as an aside. Since we’ve been helping families with claims for the last 12 years, these smaller one-off companies are just not as structured, and it’s a little more problematic. Speaker 3 So reputable company. Number two is make sure that the policy will pay for standby assistance, and it does not require someone to be completely incapacitated before you use it. And number three, if you can get it, if you can find it, indemnity or cash policies are much easier to access the benefit dollars from. Speaker 3 And indemnity means that you’re going to get your benefit dollars even if you don’t spend that full amount of money on care. And all you have to do is prove eligibility. You don’t have to prove that you paid someone. Speaker 3 So they’re just a little easier to work with. So indemnity is the key word to look for. Speaker 1 All right. Wow. I want to give your information out again, Wendy. It’s familysolutionsforcare.com. And your toll-free number, is it 888-858-4500? Speaker 3 Sorry, it’s 844-858-4500. Speaker 1 844\. Pardon me. 844-858-4500. Speaker 1 Perfect. And familysolutionsforcare.com. Let me give you some information as far as Avery Heights and Siobhan. Speaker 1 You can always get more information from Siobhan. You can get more information on the website for Avery Heights. It’s simply averyheights.org. Speaker 1 Once again, averyheights.org. and you can call this phone number, 860-953-1201. That’s 860-953-1201. Speaker 1 I want to thank our guest once again from Family Solutions for Care, Wendy Reinhart, for Siobhan Mattingly from Avery Heights. I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening to your next chapter. Speaker 1 It is a production of Avery Heights Senior Living. Until next weekend, everybody, have a good one, everyone. 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Suzette… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/senior-living-resources-moms-house/ "Senior Living Resources: Mom’s House") ## [Senior Living Resources: Mom’s House](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/senior-living-resources-moms-house/ "Senior Living Resources: Mom’s House") June 2, 2023 Mom’s House helps families solve one of their biggest challenges in the journey to senior care by offering a way to sell the house without… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning **Tags:** Financial Planning, Long-Term Care Insurance, Senior Living, Veteran Benefits --- ### [Elder Financial Health with Dr. Kevin Manning](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/elder-financial-health-with-dr-kevin-manning/) **Published:** March 24, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** In this episode we explore the importance of being informed to prevent Elder Financial abuse. Identifying unique risk profiles and factors to enhance detection, and support proactive prevention. For more information please visit: ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community, centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. It is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way that we think about aging, about senior living, and the retirement years. It is time to celebrate our seniors and give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, with inner peace, and the courage to never give up on growing. We will discuss exciting opportunities, important resources for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health. Along with senior living specialist, Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Good morning, Siobhan. Speaker 2 Good morning. I love your radio voice. Speaker 1 It’s my radio voice? I don’t really. Speaker 2 You have your conversational, you have a conversational radio voice and then you have like a radio voice when you’re doing the intro. I had no idea. Yeah. It’s awesome. Speaker 1 This is just how I talk. Speaker 2 All the time, like in the store? Speaker 1 Yes, actually. Ham and cheese. I’ll never forget the time I was, actually, I was getting deli meats at the supermarket. Yeah, yeah. And this is a while. This has got to be old. I was in television at the time. I wasn’t even in radio. I was in radio in the 90s. And then I was in, and then I went to Fox. And then I was getting deli meats and somebody goes, are you a game show host? And I go, no, come on. She’s like, oh my goodness, your voice sounds so familiar. And no, it’s just. Speaker 2 I’ve been watching Bewitched. And it’s funny when you watch those old shows, how they kind of, you know, acting was different back then. It was very. Speaker 1 Elizabeth Montgomery. Speaker 2 Yes, yes. Yes, of course. But it was different. Speaker 1 What did she do? Like this? No, no, no. Speaker 2 Wiggled her nose. Yeah, wiggled her nose, right. Speaker 1 She wasn’t the one that went like, no, that was I Dream of Jeannie. Speaker 2 Yes, yes, yeah. Speaker 1 Barbara Eden. Speaker 2 Right, right. Right. Yeah. Speaker 1 And wasn’t Larry Hagman? Yeah. Speaker 2 Who was Dallas? Speaker 1 Dallas. J.R. Ewing. Who killed J.R. Yeah. Going back to Elizabeth Montgomery. Are you Dick York or Dick Sargent? Speaker 2 Oh, I don’t know because I just started re-watching it. And I’m watching it with my daughter, who she loves it. She’s like, she’s loving it. Speaker 1 Dick York. Speaker 2 Really? Yeah. Speaker 1 I like the first Dick. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 I can’t decide. I can’t decide. I’ll have to see the other one again. But it is fun to watch. Esmeralda? Esmeralda. I love her. With the eye shadow. I can’t believe how much eye shadow. And the hair. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Thick. Yeah. Speaker 1 Thick. Speaker 2 It’s such a simple show. No, I’ve never seen the show. Speaker 1 Was it good? No. Speaker 2 Do you watch it on TV land? No. Nick at Night. On Amazon. Amazon. Oh, on Amazon. Yeah, it’s on Freebie or Freebie or something. Some station. Well, no, Amazon has its own channel. Amazon Prime, right? Right, but they have channels within their channels, like Showtime and Starz. They’re all within there. Yeah. Oh. Speaker 1 Really? Yes. Geez, I hate to be thinking I’m paying for something twice. Oh, right. Because I get HBO and Cinemax and Showtime. Well, you still have to pay for them. But I also have Amazon Prime. So if you’re telling me I already get those channels in Amazon Prime, then why am I double? Speaker 2 Well, you still have to pay for them inside of Amazon Prime. Oh. I don’t know if they’re cheaper inside of Amazon. I don’t know. Speaker 1 My bill. Oh, my goodness. Speaker 2 Do you have Cox? I don’t have cable. Speaker 1 Oh, because you have Amazon Prime. Speaker 2 Yeah, Roku. Speaker 1 I got it. Let me tell you something. Speaker 2 I just did that two years ago. Speaker 1 I need to do that. I need to cut that cord. Seriously. Because if I get internet, I got rid of my local landline phone. Cable’s expensive. And I save $5. I’m like, that’s it? Speaker 2 Don’t you, isn’t that such a disappointment? You’re like, oh, I’ll get rid of this and I’m going to save you so much money. I got two thirds. Speaker 1 I got rid of one third. I’m just getting it. Exactly. All I’d say was $5. Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 My cable bill, I’m embarrassed to say this. $2.45 a month. Speaker 2 Oh, what do you have? Okay. There’s never anything on. That’s why I got rid of cable because you’re on station 4,000. Speaker 1 You’re so right. And nothing is on. You’re so right. I have, matter of fact, Cox can’t sell me anything anymore. They’ll go, you have everything. I’ve got the highest speed internet. I’ve got every channel known to man other than the ethnic stations, which I don’t know what they’re saying anyway, so I don’t need them. Speaker 2 Right. Speaker 1 So I’ve got every channel that they could possibly sell me, that I could utilize. Speaker 2 You don’t watch the Telenabellas? Am I saying that right? Speaker 1 The soap operas? Telenabellas? The Spanish. Speaker 2 No. The Spanish soap operas. Speaker 1 Oh, Telemundo. Those are good. Speaker 2 Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Those are good. They. My next-door neighbor used to watch them. Yeah. Those are, yeah. There’s a lot going on. Speaker 1 You ever watch Sonia Live? She hasn’t been on in a while. No. Oh, that was some topics on that. She was like the Sally Jesse Raphael in the Hispanic community. Oh, wow. Speaker 2 No, I never. Speaker 1 Sonia. Speaker 2 I don’t think. Yeah. Speaker 1 Sonia Live, it was called. Holy smokes. Because they used to have the, you could, you know, transfer. You see what they were talking about, you know. They translate it in the lower thirds, in the subtitles. Yeah, yeah. And I was like, holy smokes. This is the middle of the afternoon. So you brought a guest in with you today. I did. That’s great. Why don’t you take the liberty to introduce him? Speaker 2 So this is Dr. Kevin Manning from UConn Pepper Center, and he’s amazing. I actually asked him to send me like a bio and questions and so forth, and it was like the best one I’ve gotten so far. He did a great job. Speaker 1 Well, welcome, Doc. Speaker 2 Hey, thank you. I’m not impressed with the fact that he’s a doctor, but that he does. What was that? I’m not impressed with the fact that he’s a doctor, but that he sent me the information. That I can write my own bio. Speaker 1 Thanks for having me. Multi-talented, I see. That’s great. Well, I’m going to ask you about yourself in just one moment. But you had me thrown with the Pepper Center. I am not familiar with the Pepper Center. Forgive me. Of course, if I should be, I would imagine why hasn’t this even come up in like a general conversation? Enlighten us. What is the Pepper Center? Speaker 3 Yeah, happy to. So the Pepper Older Americans Independent Center at UConn is one of 15 such centers throughout the United States funded by the National Institute on Aging. And these centers were named in honor of Claude D. Pepper, the late senator from Florida, who advocated for senior health and research to help older adults maintain or restore their independence. And the overarching goal of the Pepper Center, or the Pepper Program, is to enhance function and independence in older adults. And at UConn, we’re pioneering a theme called precision gerontology. And this is a mouthful, so bear with me, okay? So precision gerontology, an approach to aging research in the care of older adults that seeks to render interventions enhancing function and independence more effective through an improved understanding of heterogeneity and more precise targeting. Speaker 1 I don’t even know what any of this is. Speaker 3 I’m going to tell you right now. Okay. I’m glad I’m not the only one. So there’s so much variability in aging. Okay. We want to know what works for who and why. So why does one treatment work for one person doesn’t work for another person? That’s the goal of the Pepper Program. Speaker 1 Right? That’s pretty cool. Yeah. How come more people – forgive me. Why aren’t people familiar with this? Speaker 3 You know, UConn had this Pepper Center many years ago, over 20 years ago, and then recently within the last year or two has reclaimed that center of status. So it’s relatively new to answer your question. Speaker 1 Well, it kind of was there and then it went away and then it’s now back. Exactly. Tell me a little bit about yourself before I start delving into some questions. Speaker 3 Sure. So I’m what’s called a clinical neuropsychologist. That means I specialize in brain behavior relationships. My interest is in working with older adults who have cognitive problems or mood disturbances, depression, anxiety. I’m interested in how mood and cognition impact everyday functioning, like automobile driving or financial health, financial capacity. Wow. I got into this work, like so many of us, have it been impacted by Alzheimer’s disease or dementia in our families. Speaker 1 I’m going to pause you right there. Yeah, please. Siobhan, it seems like, and yourself included, I mean, this is how a lot of people enter this field. I mean, you had Lisa was here. She wrote a book about her husband. Yes. We had another guest from Massachusetts, I believe, that was on via phone. This is several weeks ago. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 These are people who have now either changed professions or have gone into the profession in somewhere dealing with Alzheimer’s and working with seniors because they, and yourself including because you are directly affected by it affect you personally you with your mom um others with their husband their spouse so on and so forth that’s it seems to be kind of on par here as far as how people get into you yourself doc was how are you affected by it if you don’t mind no not at Speaker 3 all so my my grandmother had alzheimer’s disease and passed away um and her son my uncle now has Alzheimer’s disease. And, you know, working with so many patients as a clinician, you start to see warning signs about cognitive changes early. And it often has seemed that one of those warning signs is poor financial decision making, that the inability to manage one’s finances or making poor decisions, giving money to somebody they shouldn’t have given money to. Yeah, but you can be, anybody can be scammed. Anybody can be scammed, but it does seem to happen more in older adults with cognitive impairment. And that’s how I got interested in this topic. Speaker 1 When somebody comes up, how do I put this? Do you ever have a brain cramp? You know, you know, in your moment. Yeah. I mean, it could be a middle age moment. Yeah, right. But, you know, because I find myself. Oh, my goodness. What’s the word I’m looking for? Or where the hell was I? Or, geez, what did I have for dinner the other night? Or standing in front of the fridge. Like, why did I come here? Or walking into the kitchen going, the grocery store. I remember going to the grocery store and going, geez, I bought five items except for the one that I came here for. And then I’m turning the car around and going, what in the hell is wrong with me? That’s not Alzheimer’s. Speaker 3 That’s normal. Speaker 1 Okay, thank you, Doc. Speaker 3 That’s normal, AJ. You’re welcome. That would be $500. Speaker 1 Right? So that is normal. Those are just every – is it because we’re just – so many things are thrown at us that we’re having a hard time processing everything? Speaker 3 Yeah, I think that has something to do with it, and I also think – I know the brain ages. It’s an organ. So you don’t run as fast as you did when you’re 19, 20. You don’t think it’s fast. Speaker 1 Okay. That is true then. It’s a relationship. All right. Please continue because I interrupted you. I’m sorry. Speaker 3 You don’t remember what you’re saying? I don’t remember. There’s my middle-aged moment. Speaker 1 Oh, come on. What was I saying? You forgot where you left off. Exactly. I mean, look, I mean, obviously the center does so much. But our topic, of course, today is elder financial health. So, Doc, what should older adults be aware of when it comes to financial health? Because you already mentioned it. That’s like a first sign. Speaker 3 Yeah. I mean, older adults should continue to educate themselves on the topic of financial well-being. And this means recognizing examples of exploitation and financial fraud, as well as being concerned about improving their financial well-being. You’ll hear me say this, information is key. So getting as much education and information as they can on the topic. Speaker 1 I hate when people take advantage of the elderly. Whether or not you have Alzheimer’s or some cognitive disorder, they’re a vulnerable portion of our population as it is. Speaker 2 And they don’t talk about it either. Speaker 1 No, because they’re embarrassed. Which makes it worse. Yes, and they’re not aware of it happening. Exactly. Well, yeah, especially initially. They’re unaware of it. And then when they finally, I think if they’re able to connect the dots and they go, oh, my goodness, I’ve been swindled. I better not let my son know, my wife know, my daughter know. then maybe break it down for us. People are obviously familiar with the terms exploitation and fraud, but what does it mean to be that victim of financial exploitation or even financial fraud? Yeah, sure. So financial exploitation, put simply, is theft. It’s taking Speaker 3 advantage of somebody. It’s a type of elder abuse that refers to the illegal or improper use of someone else’s property, income, resources. Taking advantage of them. Taking advantage of them. This often happens in a relationship built on trust. So a caregiver or a family member who is using somebody else’s resources without their permission, fraud is deception, trying to deceive somebody into buying something or giving money for a purpose other than what is supposedly intended. And then, you know, older adults are still at risk for identity theft when somebody steals their personal information. Speaker 1 So identity theft is illegal. Speaker 3 Fraud is illegal. Exploitation is illegal. Speaker 1 Exploitation is. But taking advantage of someone is not illegal. This happens, I think, everybody to some degree. And if we’re going to be truthful with each other, we’ve all been on both sides of that. Have I ever taken advantage of somebody? Sure. And have I been taken advantage of? Oh, I know I have been. It’s wrong, and it’s immoral, but is it illegal? Speaker 3 No. It’s not illegal taking advantage of somebody, I think, in the way that you mean. But financial exploitation is taking advantage of somebody that involves theft. And manipulation? Could involve manipulation. You know, one example is for older adults who are vulnerable, perhaps they give power of attorney to somebody. So they sign over the right to access that person’s funds or bank account. And there’s an agreement through that power of attorney that they’re going to do this in an honorable, straightforward way. But there’s nothing really stopping somebody who has power of attorney to come in and take somebody else’s resources or money. That’s not really manipulation. That’s theft, right? That’s just straight out theft. Speaker 2 And we see it all the time when we have kids that might live here maybe in Connecticut and maybe their loved one lives in Florida or South Carolina and then the neighbor will become power of attorney and literally take advantage of that older adult, take their money, put them in a home, put them in maybe an assisted living there or something like that. And then the kids are trying to figure this out legally and it’s just a disaster. And I’ve seen that so many times, and it is very sad. Speaker 1 So then what places an older adult more at risk than, let’s say, somebody middle-aged? Speaker 3 Yeah. There are cognitive changes and social changes that occur with aging. Clearly, cognitive decline, cognitive impairment puts somebody at risk for exploitation and fraud. Social changes, loneliness, depression, isolation, those put people at risk. Disability, medical burden. So we know that people who are disabled who can’t care for themselves, who have several comorbid illnesses, they’re at greater risk of financial exploitation, financial fraud. Speaker 1 This is sad. Yeah, it is. How prevalent is this? Speaker 3 So any estimate I’m going to give you is probably an underestimate, right? But we think that this documented cases occur anywhere from 3% to 10% of older adults in the last year. And we think that’s an underreporting for the reasons you touched on before, that people are embarrassed, that they don’t want to report this. They don’t want to report this to somebody that they trust. So if this occurs in the context of a familial relationship or this occurs in the context of a caregiver who they depend on, they don’t want to report that person. So we think any estimates we have are probably underestimates. Speaker 1 You know, I just wish that there were signs, you know, you would I’d you’d mentioned a moment ago, you know, of the financial signs. But before – I wish there were signs even before it got to the – you know what I’m saying? I do. Before the financial signs that – Speaker 3 So you really touch on a great point and something I think a lot about is if we think about depression and cognitive changes as risk factors for functional decline, how do we get people to do a checkup to sort of say to themselves, hey, I need to talk to somebody. I’m feeling depressed or do I have depression? What is depression? Do I have cognitive impairment that’s greater than middle age or later life expectation? I don’t know the best way to address that. But what I what I think about is talking to somebody’s physician, talking to family members, you know, getting evaluated, talking with your doctor about, hey, can can you refer me for some battery of testing or some questions? so I can learn more about my mental health, my cognitive health, and determine whether I’m at risk for something like poor financial decision making. Speaker 1 I just hate to know that someone has already lost a portion of their income or wealth or savings if there was a telltale sign prior to that so it wouldn’t get to that point. Like you said, this checkup, you know, you might as well mention depression. Sadly, there’s so many people who suffer from depression who may not be clinically diagnosed. Correct. And may not even be at a point where they’re even at a, that they can admit to themselves that they’re under depression. But yet they suffer from it. In which case, and sadly, it’s often too late. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byer, and our guest this morning is Dr. Kevin Manning from the UConn Pepper Center. How then? I mean, how can someone protect themselves, Doc, from fraud and exploitation? Yeah. Speaker 3 So information is your best friend, your best defense against fraud. So there’s a couple of great programs that aren’t part of UConn but are part of the state of Connecticut, part of the federal government. So the Money Smart for Older Adults program that was developed by the FDIC and the Bureau of Consumer Financial Protection raises awareness among older adults and their caregivers on how to prevent financial exploitation and fraud. Locally, the state of Connecticut Department of Banking has a wonderful website devoted to consumer information and education resources. This includes education for investors, tips for protecting oneself from fraud, and a special section devoted to seniors. And then touching on what we were just talking about, I think at the individual level, this checkup might involve asking yourself some questions. If you’re concerned about a family member or yourself even, start to ask yourself some questions. And those questions are, are you socially isolated? Do you feel depressed, lonely? People might not be able to define depression, but they can define loneliness. Have you experienced a change in the ability to care for yourself? Do you depend on somebody else to care for you? Are you comfortable with that relationship? Do you trust that person? Have you recently lost a loved one, a spouse, another family member? Have you given power of attorney to somebody? Those are some questions. Some other questions from a financial perspective are, do you run out of money by the end of the month? Do you worry about financial decisions made. Do you understand your bills? Do you understand the financial decisions you’re being asked to make? Is somebody pressuring you to lend them money? Yeah. Or co-signing. Or co-signing. Speaker 1 Yeah. So you see patients. Are you also you yourself conducting research? Speaker 3 Yeah, that’s right. So through the Pepper Center, we have a pilot project on financial capacity, financial decision making in older adults. We’re particularly interested in older adults who suffer from depression, who have a type of depression known as apathy or a lack of motivation, lack of effort to get going. We’re concerned that those older adults might be at the greatest risk for functional decline, cognitive decline. So we’re conducting a study on financial capacity. Speaker 1 And the depression is more often precipitated by loneliness, right? Speaker 3 It’s a really good, it’s a very good point. Certainly psychosocial stressors, loneliness increase our risk for depression. We know that social support is a very strong risk factor for depression. Not everybody who’s depressed feels lonely or has poor social support, right? We think about depression as a biological illness. There could be many causes for it. Certainly one’s environment interacts with our genes to cause that illness. What qualifies a subject? Speaker 1 How do we get involved in your research? Speaker 3 Yeah, thanks. So we’re interested in really all older adults, those with and without depression. So you don’t have to have depression to participate in the study. You have to be 60 years of age or older, not currently have a diagnosis of dementia because we want to really study the earliest changes in aging and functional decline. But otherwise, there’s not much that would keep people from participating. And they can always call me directly if they’re interested. That’s 860-679-2272. Speaker 1 And finally, because I want to bring Siobhan back into this, just finding out more information or getting involved with the center and the research that’s being done. Speaker 3 Yeah, so we have a great website. I’ll make sure I’ll be included in the show notes. And there’s many other studies at the Pepper Center that are ongoing and really studying a variety of topics from basic research to exercise research to different types of treatments for older adults. Speaker 2 And driving too. And driving. Yeah. Speaker 3 And we do some stuff in automobile driving as well. Yeah. Speaker 2 And a simulator, right? Speaker 3 We do. Speaker 2 Yeah, we do. We do have a cool. I’m like a little kid. We do. Speaker 3 Come over and try it out. We do have a simulator. Speaker 2 I’d be afraid to because they probably would take my license. Speaker 1 Siobhan, what you see at Avery Heights, and what Kevin is saying is, do you see it firsthand on the grounds of Avery Heights since you’re there five days a week? Do you see a lot of this? Speaker 2 Usually before. So like I said, like we have when the adult children come in and they’re doing the tours. These are when you hear the sad stories. The worst one I heard was a couple weeks ago. A gentleman came in. He was in a different state. you know, beautiful house he had and all this stuff. And so they decided they wanted to downsize and go to an assisted living. And they signed a, it was a year long contract. Come to find out that was what they had to give for notice. So he ended up having to pay, went to go see a lawyer after the fact, but he had to pay every month $8,000 for a year because that’s the notice. And the, you know, the assisted living wouldn’t let him, because, you know, his wife was kind of like, she decided she didn’t want to go anymore. And so he had to end up paying that. And that’s really sad. And this guy was sitting there. I mean, this is like a guy who plays golf. Maybe he was like – I think he was like in his 70s. And he literally – his eyes started to tear up. And that was so challenging for me because I can’t sit there. It’s not about me. I’m not going to sit there and start crying. But it was the saddest thing I’ve ever seen. And his embarrassment and even just telling me this story, I was just like – I thought to myself if it was us. We don’t have a year-long – you can give a 60-day or 30-day notice. I understand the rules. I understand them. But I would think they’d at least maybe two months. They can re-rent the place. But it was really sad. That’s a lot of money. Oh, it is. Speaker 1 I just wish people in a perfect world stay more active. And it’s hard to do that when you’re alone. Yes. But it’s not impossible. There’s a difference between lonely and being independent. There’s a sadness that’s associated with being lonely. But independent. There’s plenty of people at any age that go to the movies and out to dinner by themselves. And by the way, by design. Sometimes they prefer it. Speaker 2 The best company we keep. Speaker 1 Being alone doesn’t mean your own way. Well, that’s true. Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 Boy, I could have done, actually, we’re at the end of our time this morning. But wow. Amazing. We’ve got to get him back. My pleasure. There’s other things that we’ve kind of delved into. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington and Hartford. Those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care in a whole lot more charming cottages. with a true neighborhood feel. They’re all available to rent adjacent to the main building where those who need more assistance reside. Please visit AveryHeights.org or by calling 860-953-1201. That’s 860-953-1201. This is to learn more about their own very special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. it i’d like to thank our guests this morning dr kevin manning from the yukon pepper center one Speaker 3 more time the website and phone number 670-679-2272 and the phone number oh the phone number the website oh the website the website is yukon pepper center i’m losing it’ll be at your place tomorrow Speaker 1 right early by the way i’m gary byron until next weekend have a good one everybody so long # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Learn more … **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's, Financial & Legal Planning **Tags:** Alzheimer's, Brain Health, Dementia, Financial Planning --- ### [How to Pay for Your Next Chapter – Senior Living: Part #4 Veteran's Benefits](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/how-to-pay-for-your-next-chapter-senior-living-part-4-veterans-benefits/) **Published:** June 2, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Patriot Angels The Aid and Attendance benefit is a monetary benefit that helps eligible veterans and their surviving spouses to pay for senior living. Suzette Graham founder and CEO of Patriot Angels gives insight and important information on this benefit. Website: [www.patriotangels.com](http://www.patriotangels.com/) ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning, everybody, and welcome to your next chapter, a production of the Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Now, it’s never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way we think about aging, about senior living, and the retirement years, along with Siobhan Mattingly. Speaker 1 She’s the Heights Senior Living Specialist. I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, good to see you. Speaker 1 Good to see you. Ah, how was your long weekend? How was Memorial Day at Avery Heights? Speaker 2 It was phenomenal. It’s actually the first year, well, probably in a long time, that they actually did a Memorial Day ceremony at the Heights. And we actually opened up our patio. Speaker 2 I know. So that’s new. And it was beautiful. Speaker 1 Yeah, because last time you were here, you were like, you couldn’t wait. Yes. You were raving about it. Speaker 2 It was just beautiful. Actually, we had a young kid, actually from my daughter’s school, Cedric Middle School, Lucas French. He did an amazing job. Speaker 2 He actually played taps on the trumpet. And the whole thing was wonderful. We had a gentleman from the Coast Guard came. Speaker 2 We had some of our residents do like the Pledge of Lesions and stuff like that, which was really good. But the best part was TAPS because I think, you know, obviously we deal with a population. A lot of folks have dementia or Alzheimer’s, but there’s something about music memory. Speaker 2 And some of the folks that have those challenges actually stood up. And the best thing, it actually made me cry. It was an emotional song. Speaker 2 It was when the gentleman took off his hat. And it’s one of those things, this gentleman, he has a wonderful wife, and she basically has to tell him most things to do. But she was not whispering to him. Speaker 2 She said nothing to him. He stood up and took off his hat. It’s just like he just knew. Speaker 2 He just knew. He heard that song, and he’s a veteran, and he just knew what to do. And it was pretty emotional. Speaker 1 You had a guest on, oh, my goodness. It must have been a month ago or so. We were talking about Alzheimer’s. In fact, you’ve had a few guests on to discuss Alzheimer’s. And that’s one of the things that they mention. Speaker 1 Music. Is that music is instantly recognizable. It was beautiful. Speaker 1 They’ll know the lyrics to a song before we can recognize the person who they’re singing the song to. Yeah, it was pretty beautiful. Speaker 2 And actually, the gentleman that we have there that’s 104, he stood up on his own. That’s the thing that really touched me is that folks that are, you know, impaired physically or whatever it may be mentally, they just kind of clicked in and to look around the room and just to see the silence. And some of them were emotional as well. Speaker 2 It was pretty impactful. The staff, it was beautiful. And then right after we kind of livened it up, we did our social hour outside, and it was really cool. Speaker 2 And, you know, we were all serving. We all had, like, sections. Reminded me when I used to be a waitress. Speaker 2 So we all had our little sections and amazing appetizers. Tim did a great job. He had, like, scallops wrapped in bacon. Speaker 2 Actually, George, our dining room director, he’s amazing. He actually made his pizza. I think I told you about him. Speaker 2 He’s actually from Canada. He used to have a pizza franchise out there. So he made pizza. Speaker 2 It was amazing. It was really good. And then we had like little mini quiches that they prepared and a full bar. Speaker 2 Full bar. It was really good. The funniest thing when I was – normal people, they want beer, wine, lots of wine, lots of white wine. Speaker 2 And this one woman’s like, oh, let me think of what I want. Oh, I want a scotch on the rocks with a twist. I’m like, all righty. Speaker 2 What do you think you’re at? Cheers? And I went to the bar and I’m like, she wants scotch on the rocks. Speaker 2 And she whipped it up. Really? She whipped it up. Speaker 2 I was really – and the twist. Did you card her? She did have red, red hair, so she was up to something. Speaker 2 No, no, I’m just kidding. Speaker 1 Well, I’m glad that you, I know you’ve been looking forward to this. It was a big weekend over at a time. Speaker 2 And the weather cooperated just, just, just. The weather was perfect. It was a nice breeze. Speaker 2 And that was the beautiful part, too, because we did it out on the patio. And the patio has the beautiful flag, the American flag. And then there’s that little, with the taps, and then you hear that little, it was silent. Speaker 2 So you hear that little flap of the flag. We got it all on video. It’s actually on our Facebook page. Speaker 2 It’s really nice. Speaker 1 Was it on Memorial Day itself? Speaker 2 No, we did not. And the reason why we don’t do stuff like on the day of is because, you know, we want to get good speakers. And a lot of times the residents go out, too. Speaker 2 There’s so much stuff going on on those occasions, like at Foxwoods and various different places, that, you know, a lot of our residents will go to those. And so we want to make sure we get the most, you know, maximum amount of residents, but also the best speakers as well. So we did that on Friday with our social hour. Speaker 2 But on Saturday, our residents went to the Iwo Jima, I hope I’m saying that right. Oh, Memorial, yes. Right for Route 9 in Newington. Speaker 2 We had a field trip there, and that was very well attended as well. That’s great. Yeah, we’re taking care of our veterans. Speaker 2 It’s so nice to see, and it’s nice in the hallway this morning. They’re like, oh, great event, great event. It’s not about them saying great event. Speaker 2 It’s just about the fact that they know that they’re recognized and that they’re just being appreciated. Because a lot of these guys, you know, once you get older, how often, unless you’re wearing your veteran’s hat or whatever, do you get recognized and appreciated? And especially, you know, I think it’s super important. Speaker 2 And it leads to our guest. Speaker 1 Well, let’s talk about our guest. Speaker 2 So it’s the end of our four-part financial service, which we acknowledge was a huge topic. You asked me several times, what’s the first thing I get asked? How are we going to pay for this? Speaker 2 So we’ve been doing paying for senior living. We’ve had everything on from bridge loans to long-term care insurance. Now, this is one that’s near and dear to my heart, veterans’ benefits, AIDS and attendance’ benefit. Speaker 2 And we have Ms. Suzette Graham on. She’s the CEO for Patriot Angels. We use them. Speaker 2 They do an amazing job. And I’m just looking forward to hear her talk more about her company. Good morning, Suzette. Speaker 3 Good morning. Thank you for having me. Speaker 1 Well, welcome to the show. We’re glad that you are able to be with us this morning. Hey, listen, before we get into Patriot Angels, I’d love to know a little bit about yourself. What’s your background? Speaker 3 Well, believe it or not, my degree is petroleum technology. Speaker 1 I knew it was. What else could it possibly be? Speaker 3 It has nothing to do with senior living. I was raised in Alaska. That’s what you do in Alaska. Speaker 3 But I became a child advocate in Alaska. I’ve done advocate work my whole life, and I helped get the laws changed to get foster children out of foster homes or out of the foster system and into permanent homes. And then I moved to Tennessee about 20 years ago and started helping homeowners that were in foreclosure stop their foreclosures. Speaker 3 And when the market went soft, I went, okay, well, what am I going to do now? And so I went to work for this company helping veterans, or so I thought. It turned out to be backed by an insurance company that sold annuities, and the whole purpose was to find out how much money they had, sell them an annuity, and I didn’t want anything to do with that. Speaker 3 So I started Patriot Angels. Speaker 1 Very nice. Now, let’s talk about Patriot Angels and what service does your company provide? Speaker 3 So Patriot Angels helps veterans and widows receive a pension called aid and attendance. And it’s part of the pension plan that a veteran gets when they serve. As long as they served 90 active duty days during a wartime, then they’re eligible for this pension. Speaker 3 And this pension helps them pay for their care and senior living. So talk about how do we pay for care. This is one of the biggest untouched avenues because 30% to 50% of clients moving into senior housing or living in senior housing are veterans or widows, and yet less than 2% are getting benefits. Speaker 1 Why is that? Speaker 3 Little known is part of it and difficult to get is the other part. I have a call center I have 130 people here and we work with the VA every single day and it’s not an easy benefit to work through the paperwork an application if you go to the VA they’ll give you four pages and when ours are turned into the VA they’re anywhere from 50 to 150 pages depending on the client Speaker 2 yeah and it’s definitely little known I don’t know how many tours I do where I mention the aides in attendance they’re like what And these are people that need it, that don’t have the funds. Why is it so difficult? And they’ve been sometimes, I mean, to maybe Veterans Services places as well, asking about how do I pay for senior living. And for some reason, they’re not mentioning this benefit sometimes. That’s the one that really surprises me. Speaker 3 Many of them don’t know about it, just so you know. That makes sense. Because they specialize in service-connected benefits. Speaker 3 And that’s from, you know, as soon as they get out of the military all the way through in age. So that’s kind of their specialty. This is kind of this little unknown, untapped benefit over here. Speaker 3 And just to give you an idea, there’s over 14,000 VA-accredited agents across the United States. Okay, 14,000 people have been accredited by the VA saying, yes, you can do benefits. Okay, we’re one. Speaker 3 We’re just one of those 14,000. And yet last year we were responsible for 16.4% of all the approvals across the nation, according to the VA’s workload. So it just kind of lets you know that there’s not a lot of people that know how to get this benefit. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. I’m so disheartened to hear this. I really am. Speaker 1 And I’m kind of speechless. My producer who spent 20 years in the Marine Corps, you know, I mean, he’s disheartened to hear this as well. Just out of curiosity, how did you get your company started? Speaker 3 Well, when I was working for that other company, right, it was backed by an insurance company, and their whole goal was to find out how much money the client had to convince them to buy their annuity. Well, when annuity is, the money is put into annuity or SPIA specifically, the client no longer has that money and they can’t go back and get it when they need it. Well, I felt like that was a real disservice to these people because, you know, when you go into senior living, the cost of care just continues to go up and you need to be able to get to your resources. Speaker 3 And so I thought, you know what, that’s, I don’t want to be a part of that. Well, it just so happens that the COO of the largest senior living corporation, Brookdale, stopped by our office and left his card. And so I called and I said, hey, do you, I said, can I have a meeting? Speaker 3 And he said, sure. And I went and met with him and I said, do you know that, you know, people are going into your communities to do these VA seminars and they’re there really to find how much money the client has? And he said, well, of course not. Speaker 3 We didn’t know that. And he said, what are you doing tomorrow? And I said, I’m looking for a job. Speaker 3 And so he said, come back tomorrow. And I went back the next day, and I met with John Rios and Ron Ehler and Greg Richard. And they said, if you’ll start a company, we’ll be your first referral source. Speaker 3 So they started referring. So I went home and set up a desk in the corner room of my bonus room. I had no idea what I was doing. Speaker 3 I had a magic jack that I plugged into my phone and my computer and started calling, just started calling people and saying, hey, do you know this benefit’s out there? And my phone started ringing off the hook. So I had to hire my first employee, which was my daughter, and I put her in the next corner. Speaker 3 And then I hired my son to help me organize it all, and I put him in the next corner. And I tell people I ran out of corners before I did children, so I had to get a bigger place. Speaker 1 What is the AIDS in attendance benefit? Speaker 3 So it’s actually an upgraded pension. So base pension is really for veterans or other widows that have no money. So it’s called base pension. Speaker 3 But then there’s upgrades to it, like housebound. If you can’t leave your home without the assistance of someone else, there’s even more that you can get. And then the top level is aid and attendance. Speaker 3 And aid in attendance is for a veteran or their surviving spouse to use to help supplement their cost of care. So if they’re moving into a senior living community or if they’re getting in-home care, that is what it’s meant for. And it’s a sizable benefit. Speaker 3 Just so you know, a veteran can get up to $2,229 a month, a married veteran $2,642 a month, and the widow or surviving spouse of a veteran $1,432 a month. So it goes a long way in helping them pay for this care that they need. Speaker 1 All right, but specifically, who’s eligible? Speaker 3 So the veteran’s 65 and up. or their surviving spouse, that can be any age, and in need of care. So they’re either needing a protective environment where they can’t live home alone anymore, they need a protective environment, or they’re receiving two or more ADLs. And the ADLs the VA allow is like bathing or standby for bathing, dressing or standby for dressing, hand feeding, toileting. So there’s specific ADLs the VA allows, and they have to be getting at least two of those, and then and or a protective environment with custodial care. Speaker 1 Now, is this all income-based? Speaker 3 So it’s income-based, yes and no. Okay. So if you look on the VA’s website, it’ll tell you you can only make X amount a year, and people go, oh, I make more than that. What it doesn’t explain is you subtract out what they’re paying for care, and then that’s what’s considered their income. Speaker 3 So if a veteran’s, you know, on a limited budget of $2,500 a month but is paying $3,000 to live in a community, they’re negative $500. So that’s what you have to explain. Also, they can have up to $150,000 in liquid assets and a home on less than two acres. Speaker 3 So the home doesn’t count. And, of course, personal property doesn’t count like cars and things like that. So what counts is $150,000 in assets and a home on less than two acres. Speaker 1 So is that the limit? Is that the net worth limit to be eligible for this? Speaker 3 Yes, absolutely. So they cannot have any more than that. If they have more than that, then you start looking at, you know, are there names, how many names are on the bank accounts, things like that. Speaker 3 Now, there is a three-year look back, so they can’t gift. You know, there’s no gifting. There’s no putting into trust, things like that. Speaker 1 Interesting. like a lot of people who may not even be aware of this. Do you find that that’s the hardest obstacle? I mean, is that nobody knows this even exists, or am I mistaken? Speaker 3 No, people do not know it exists. And when they do call, they’ll get one of our brochures, they’ll call and they’ll go, wait, this sounds too good to be true. But it is true. Speaker 3 It’s part of their pension package. They earned it. I mean, it can be traced all the way back to before Abraham Lincoln. Speaker 3 He just reinstated it. But it’s always been there, and it’s our job to take care of the widows and the orphans and our job to bear the rights for the veteran that served. And so it’s our job to tell people about it. Speaker 1 Like I said a moment ago, my producer’s in this room. He’s a 20-year vet from the Marine Corps, and he’s shaking his head. He’s like, no, never even knew this existed. Speaker 2 I think the other challenge is people get afraid, too, when they see that it’s asset and income-based, and then they just won’t apply. I tell everyone, make the phone call, get your file started with Patriot Angels, and that way, at least when you are ready to apply, you can be ready. But a lot of times, like some of the stuff that she was just saying, people don’t know that. Speaker 2 They don’t know that you subtract out what you’re paying for care from your income and different things like that. So I always tell people just apply. Let them tell you. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 You know, right. Yeah. Doesn’t hurt. Speaker 1 It’s like trying something. Exactly. If you don’t succeed, you don’t succeed. Speaker 1 But at least you went down swing. At least you try. Exactly. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning from Patriot Angels is Suzette Graham. Speaker 1 Suzanne, where specifically can these benefits be used? How can they be used? Speaker 3 So you can use them for in-home care, like I said, but it’s a reimbursement, Gary. You have to be paying for care first. And a lot of times people will call and go, well, as soon as I get it, then I’ll do this. Speaker 3 That’s not how it works. And so we’re a consulting company, Patriot Angels Consulting. So we explain the benefit to people. Speaker 3 We explain to them how it works. We explain what they need to do and when’s a good time to get started. We let them know up front if they’re a good candidate or not. Speaker 3 We let them know if they have the right service times or not. And so they can use it if they’re moving into independent living, which a lot of people tell you that doesn’t work, but it does. They can be moving into assisted living, memory care, or in-home. Speaker 1 Interesting. What’s considered wartime services? Speaker 3 So there’s specific wartime that the VA acknowledges. And, of course, World War II, we’re coming to the end of those, but that’s December of 41 to December of 46. Of course, Korea, which is June of 50 to January of 55. Speaker 3 And then Vietnam. Vietnam’s a little trickier because from 55 to 64, they had to be boots on the ground or on a ship within 12 nautical miles. After 64 to 75, they just had to have been enlisted. Speaker 3 Now, they didn’t actually have to be in war in any of these wars. They could have during war times. They could have been, you know, in a kitchen in Kansas. Speaker 3 But as long as they were enlisted, they were eligible except for those nine years of Vietnam. Then in 1980, the rules changed for the Persian Gulf War that they had to have been enlisted at least two years or a complete tour of service. So if they were called up to go to Afghanistan or something for eight months, as long as they completed that eight-month tour, then they were eligible for this benefit. Speaker 1 All right. Because I’m running out of time, how does someone start the process? Speaker 3 So call us. We do everything electronically over the phone. Just call. Speaker 3 We’ll walk you through a quick questionnaire to see if you are a good candidate or not. We’ll let you know. You can call our office at 844-757-3047 or look us up, patriotangels.com. Speaker 3 And we’ll get this started for you. Speaker 1 Do they have to prove that they were in the military and what their rank or status was? Speaker 3 They have to have, yes. So we have to have their discharge documents. And we have another company right here in our building that I started called Angels Research. What they do is they research for documents. If somebody can’t find their documents or if they have just dad’s old document, they don’t want to get rid of it. then they can call angels research angels research will research they’ve called nasa before they’ve called um uh cemeteries and had people go out and take pictures of tombstones they’ve you know they will research on the fold or ancestry uh through the archives they will do whatever they can to find documentation for our veterans to prove their service times it sounds thorough i’m impressed do Speaker 1 help with the process at all as far as gathering the necessary materials yourself or is is this all strictly done by that that side group of angels that you were just mentioning so angels research Speaker 3 does the military documents but my company works with the family now realize there’s things we can’t get so we can’t get your bank statements we can’t get your social security statement things like that So the things that we cannot get, we actually have the family get for us. But once they do, we pull together all the ancillary documents that the VA requires. We make a fully developed claim, and we even submit it in our own portal straight to the VA so it can’t get lost in the mail. So we work directly with the VA to get these submitted. Speaker 1 That’s very nice to hear. Generally, how long does it take to obtain the benefits? Speaker 3 After we send the application, so it depends on how long it takes the family to get us the documents we need. But after we make the application, it’s generally anywhere between 90 and 120 days on average that they’re approved. We track it weekly right now. Speaker 3 I think we’re at 96 days. That’s average. Of course, if the VA sees something that the family didn’t know and didn’t tell us, then they’re going to come back and ask us for more information. Speaker 3 We’re going to do that for the family. We’re going to answer those questions by the VA. We’re going to work with the family until they’re approved. Speaker 3 We stay with them through the process. Speaker 1 Oh, that’s great. I mean, I would imagine a lot of people, you know, need help, you know, filling out these forms and providing all the documentation that is required and probably easy to miss a field box that you have to fill in. Listen, actually, I’m just glad that you’re on making people aware that this even exists. Speaker 1 I was flabbergasted. I was completely in shock to hear this. What is the intent to file? Speaker 1 Why is this an important document to fill out? Speaker 3 So the intent to file, let’s say somebody calls us and we know they’re moving into the community. the first of next month, we’re going to send an intent to file. What that is, is a letter to the VA letting them know that we have an intention to file a claim for that person. The day the VA gets it is the day the VA starts looking at the financials of that client. But they also give them the first of the next month as a start date. So then we can, now we have a start date, we can gather documents, we can put together the application, we can submit it. And then once the VA makes a decision and approves it, it goes all the way back to that start date. So, you know, it may have taken the family 30 days to get us documents, sometimes 60 days. But once we have those documents, we make the application, they’re still going to get a check retro to that start Speaker 1 date. Siobhan, have you heard of this? Yes. You have. Speaker 2 I always tell people, I send them to Patriot Angels, but I also tell them that intent to file is so important because then they get a nice big check, you know, being retro. Yeah, retro. Which is great. Yeah. Speaker 2 I love this benefit. This is like long-term care and this benefit when you’re doing a tour and you’re talking about the financials when you get to that point and they say, oh, you know, dad was a veteran. I’m like, yes. I’m like, was it during wartime? Speaker 2 Yes. And then I like, that’s, you know, I just start the questioning, and if they answer, check all the boxes, this is a really good benefit to have. And I think a lot of times with surviving spouses, people don’t realize that, that there’s benefits for them too. Speaker 2 And, you know, it’s a great benefit. It puts people at ease to know, okay, if this, you know, once we get to this point or even people that first come in, they can’t afford it, this tells them that they’ve got some funds and they deserve it. I mean, they served our country. Speaker 2 They deserve this. Absolutely. Speaker 3 100%. I can tell you one more. Yeah, please. If the veteran was 65 at 9-11, we can get them an additional year back pay as long as they were paying for care. So, Siobhan, if you have a veteran that’s been in your community for several years and then they apply, we can actually get them a year prior as long as they were paying for care. Speaker 2 Wow. I am writing that down. That’s awesome. Speaker 1 I mean, how often do you come across somebody, Suzette, that’s never heard of this, that they’re being informed or educated of this for the very first time? Speaker 3 Oh, every day. Yeah, I bet. Every day. Speaker 3 People call all the time like, are you sure? This is real. I sit on a plane. Speaker 3 I sit on a plane next to a 20-year veteran that had just left the military, and we were discussing this, and he’s like, wait a minute. I just discharged. and, you know, they have their discharge that they go through. Speaker 3 And I didn’t know anything about this. I’ve not heard anything about this. So it’s definitely a hidden, definitely a secret. Speaker 1 And it shouldn’t be like that. That’s a shame why this isn’t more widely known. Listen, I’m grateful for your time with us this morning, Suzette. Speaker 1 I really am. Folks, if you’d like more information on this, simply head online to www.patriotangels.com. Again, it’s patriotangels.com. Speaker 1 And if you’d like their phone number, get a piece of paper and a pen. I’ll say it twice. I want to make sure that you get this number. Speaker 1 It’s that important. It’s 844-757-3047. I’ll say it one more time. Speaker 1 844-757-3047. I want to thank our guest this morning from Patriot Angels, Suzette Graham. Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living. Speaker 1 To learn more about Avery Heights, call Siobhan at 860-953-1201. Again, 860-953-1201. or connect with her online at averyheights.org. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, Senior Living Specialist over at Avery Heights, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. 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Wendy Rinehart Family Solutions for Care ,Co-Owner/Co-Founder explains how to obtain, use, and the do's and don'ts… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning **Tags:** Financial Planning, Long-Term Care Insurance, Senior Living, Veteran Benefits --- ### [Welcome to the Community: What to do – What to do…](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/welcome-to-the-community-what-to-do-what-to-do/) **Published:** June 14, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** In this episode we get to know The Heights Life Enrichment Director – Theresa Guerin. The role that activities plays in the life of a residents at a Senior Living Community. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday, everybody, and welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots anywhere in Connecticut. Now, this show is dedicated to empowering older adults with helpful resources, ideas, inspiration, and tips to encourage them on life’s journey. Now, our production is also dedicated to the younger generation so they can better understand how to develop greater communication and enjoyment for those elders in their community. Speaker 1 Along with Siobhan Mattingly, Senior Living Specialist over at the Heights. I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, good to see you. Speaker 1 How are you this morning? Speaker 2 I’m good, actually. Speaker 1 You look fantastic. Speaker 2 Thank you. Speaker 1 You’re beaming, and I know why you’re beaming, by the way. You clue our listeners in. Prior to going to air, you were showing me some. Speaker 2 I have another grandbaby, Alina. She’s beautiful. Speaker 1 Alina. Speaker 2 She’s beautiful. She is. She is. I fell in love with her instantly. Speaker 1 How could you not? Hello. Speaker 2 I know. Speaker 1 All those pictures that you were, should you have a favorite or two? Speaker 2 My favorite is the one where she’s wrapped in the orange blanket. Speaker 1 Yeah, that was. She’s adorable. She is. Speaker 2 She’s so smart already, too. Speaker 1 And she’s got a brother. Speaker 2 She does, Adrian. Speaker 1 Adrian, who’s about a year and a half old. Speaker 2 He is, he is, he is. Speaker 1 And they’re just loving life. Speaker 2 Yeah, they did it really well. They actually introduced her. They gave him two toys. So they gave him a toy car and a stuffed elephant. The stuffed elephant was probably a good idea. the toy car maybe not as much because he tried to give it to her and that didn’t go so well so so that they took away but then he gave her the elephant but he keeps saying bye to her like she’s leaving like bye oh they’re like oh come see your sister and he goes over and then he goes bye Speaker 1 you’re stuck the rest of your life bud i know right so a little over a week and a half ago yeah um yeah right yeah yeah thursday of last so yeah thursday the 8th yeah thursday the 8th so Not this past Thursday, Thursday before. Yeah. Just, what is it, what does it mean from a grandmother’s perspective? I would imagine you never want to separate yourself from it. You want to be around this baby constantly. Speaker 2 It’s amazing. It’s amazing. Yeah. Speaker 2 I was so grateful that I got invited right away to come see her. Oh, wow. Yeah. Speaker 2 She’s beautiful. And I want to help out as much as possible because it’s tough having two. You know what I mean? Speaker 2 Yeah. They’re both very little too. And they got two dogs, too. Speaker 1 So two dogs, two babies. Speaker 2 And a boy and a girl dog-wise, too. Speaker 1 This is an active household. Speaker 2 But they have a huge house in Rhode Island. Speaker 1 All right, so let’s go there really quickly, and then you can introduce your guest. Rhode Island, a grandma. And I say a new grandma, even though it’s not brand new, because you’ve been a grandma for a year and a half, at least. Okay, but still, even though Rhode Island is only one state over, It’s not like it’s just a town or two over. Speaker 2 No, it’s like an hour and a half drive. But it’s not as bad as before. They weren’t Taunton before. And that was almost like two hours plus. And this doesn’t get a lot of traffic either. Speaker 1 But you still can’t just go over there for a quick visit to see. Speaker 2 We wanted them to be in Connecticut. Because I would. I’d be over there every five minutes. Speaker 2 I’d bring the strawberries. The in-studio strawberries. That’s right. Speaker 2 I’d be like, look. Speaker 1 I’m happy for you. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s exciting. It is. Speaker 2 I think the second time around it feels more exciting. And I think that’s because Adrian was born during COVID, so it was more like hands-off. I didn’t see him for six weeks. Speaker 2 It was more challenging. Speaker 1 How’s your daughter doing? Speaker 2 My daughter-in-law, she’s doing good. Daughter-in-law, excuse me. Yeah, she’s doing good. Speaker 2 She does CrossFit. She worked out like a week before. Yeah. Speaker 2 She’s very fit. Yeah. Which is good for you. Speaker 2 That’s kind of the way to do it. Speaker 1 Really? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 2 Yeah, she’s very… They’re both very fit. They’re like models. Everyone thinks they look like models. Speaker 1 And they’re in their 20s, I think. Speaker 2 They’re 30. They both turn. Well, she’s not 30 yet. Speaker 2 He turned 30 in March. She’ll turn 30 in October. So she’s not listening because I think I got that right. Speaker 1 I think it’s easier to do CrossFit when you’re 29. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Well, there’s a lot of older people that do it, though. There’s the competitions and older people do it. Yeah. Really? I think it’s a lot. Speaker 1 It’s intense. Speaker 2 It’s a lot. People break their knees. They break their elbows because it’s all that weight that they’re lifting. And it’s kind of it’s intense. Speaker 1 My luck. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Day one. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s very competitive, but yeah. I like to work out kind of, I don’t know, by myself. Speaker 2 I like to just do my thing. Yeah. I’m right there with you. Speaker 2 I don’t like a lot of people yelling at me and go, go, go. And I’m like, no. I’m not competing against anybody. Yeah. Speaker 1 I go to the gym three days a week and I’m in my own zone. Speaker 2 Exactly. That’s how I am now, too. I mean, I tried CrossFit and I used to be into the competitive stuff, but now I’m just… Speaker 1 Like in my 20s? Yeah. I could eat three Big Macs at 2 o’clock in the morning, and I’d still have, I kid you not, I’m not exaggerating, I had a 29-inch waist. Speaker 1 Yep. Okay? Now, if I see the commercial, I put weight on. Speaker 2 Did you ever see Kevin James in stand-up? He’s hysterical. Was he the king of queens? Speaker 2 Yes. And he talks about eating, I think, a quarter pounder. And he’s like a walrus. Speaker 2 He’s like, because he ate it, and it’s like, he just wants to roll over. Speaker 1 I can’t tell you the last time I had a quarter pounder. Speaker 2 Or a Big Mac or anything. Speaker 1 I can’t. Speaker 2 I just can’t. I mean, I used to love quarter. That was my thing. I wasn’t a Big Mac person because I didn’t like that sauce, but quarter pounders was my thing. But I could never, never eat a quarter pounder now. I’d be, I wouldn’t, you wouldn’t see me for weeks. Speaker 1 Yeah, I was going to say, I think I’d probably feel ill. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 It tells you how infrequent. Speaker 2 Like that movie, Super Size Me. That was good. Speaker 1 The documentary, I did see that. Speaker 2 For 30 days, he ate McDonald’s. Speaker 1 Was it one time a day or three, or breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Speaker 2 Everything, everything. Any snack, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Speaker 1 But he almost had a heart attack, right? Speaker 2 Yeah, because he was very healthy because he was vegan. And then he ate it for 30. He had the before test, and then they had the test, and they said that he was like, his kidneys, almost like kidney failure, heart failure. He was a mess. And anytime they said supersize, he had to supersize it. Speaker 1 Do they do supersize anymore? You never hear that anymore. Speaker 2 No, and I think that’s because of the movie. Oh, yeah. Well, something good came out of it. Speaker 1 Well, there you go. Speaker 2 Yeah, and how they make the nuggets now. I think they make them more with actual chicken, because remember before they had the byproducts. Speaker 1 No. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Wait a minute here, Siobhan. Yeah. So there used to be chicken McNuggets without any chicken? Yeah. Speaker 2 I know what you’re telling me. Speaker 1 I think there was some chicken. Speaker 2 I think the ones that are round, I think those had the white meat chicken. But the ones that aren’t round, I think they had other meat in them. Allegedly. I don’t want to get sued by McDonald’s. Allegedly. Speaker 1 Okay. This is the first I’ve heard of this. Speaker 2 I watch a lot of Law & Order. Way too much TV. Speaker 1 My goodness. Speaker 2 Speaking of entertainment. Speaker 1 Yes. Yes. Yeah, I know, right? Speaker 1 What a segue that was. Right? Yes. Speaker 2 My radio days. Please introduce your guest to us. So this is the wonderful Teresa, and I do mean wonderful. Speaker 2 She is our life enrichment director. She is amazing. She has taken this activities calendar, which is in front of you. Speaker 2 We have activities all week long, seven days a week, and she is beloved, and I love her. She’s amazing. Well, welcome, Teresa. Speaker 2 She’s my buddy. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Speaker 1 Your job sounds incredibly fun. I thought I had a fun job. I think this, you may have. She’s the director of fun. Beat me, yes. Speaker 3 I tell people I’m the Julie McCoy of The Love Boat, if you remember. Speaker 1 Of course. Lauren Tweese. Speaker 3 I don’t know. I don’t know. I mean, obviously it’s more involved than that. Speaker 3 But that’s the, you know, drinks on the promenade deck at 5 o’clock and shuffleboard, you know. We do have a shuffleboard for that. Are we there? Speaker 3 We do. We do. We do. Speaker 3 We have it all. We really do. We have it all. Speaker 1 There’s so many questions I have here. How is this something? Did you always know that this is something that you wanted to do? I mean, how do you get into a fun job like this? Speaker 3 Well, funny you should ask that, because if you had told me five years ago that this is what I would be doing, I didn’t even know this job existed, to be honest. Really? I was brought into the Heights, Avery Heights. Speaker 3 We have a gift shop in there, The Villager. Lovely little gift shop. And I was actually hired about seven years ago to run that gift shop. Speaker 3 And I did that, like I said, about six years part-time. And then this position opened up full-time. My kids were older. Speaker 3 I was fortunate enough to be able to stay home or be part-time when my kids were younger. But now they’re all grown, and this opportunity presented itself. And I just, you know, I’m there. Speaker 3 I know everybody there. And I just went for it. And I’m loving it. Speaker 1 I just love it. What did you do prior to the gift shop? Because you said you did the gift shop for about seven years. What were you doing prior to that? Speaker 3 I was always in retail, part-time. Like I said, I was able to stay home with my kids, which was nice. Speaker 1 Yeah, but I mean, how would you even know what the intricacies of this position are coming from running the gift shop and prior to that retail? And I could see that maneuver because they’re very similar. But wow, I mean, you’re going from selling at the gift store to now running. I’m selling activities. Speaker 3 I’m selling entertainment, socialization, a community feeling. It’s all with the same people that I already have relationships with. Speaker 1 Where do you get your ideas from? Speaker 3 A lot of things were already in place prior to me coming on board in this position, but we have brought several new things in since. But, you know, Siobhan has brought a lot of things to the table for us, a lot of new ideas that we do. And we have, you know, bingo is the favorite, the staple. You’ve got to have bingo. Never fails. Speaker 1 Good old bingo. Speaker 3 You know, I tried to, when I first came into the position, my number one goal was, aside from streamlining everything to get in a routine, which is very important for people of this age to plan around doctor’s appointments and the gym and the salon and everything else. So I wanted to streamline and have a set schedule, which we have for the most part. But also it was very important to me after two to three years of almost complete isolation of these residents to really get them out and get them back in the community and get them back to enjoying life and going to see a piano show or going to do a craft. Or, you know, we play word games and we have outings to restaurants. And it was just very important for me to get everybody back out. Speaker 1 Because I got to be honest with you, I was not even familiar with what the term life enrichment even meant. So I like how you used a cruise director as an analogy. But really, that’s kind of what you are, right? Speaker 1 I mean, you come up with the activities, but you’re showing them also how to perform these activities? I mean, anybody could put something down on a calendar and go, it’s bingo. Self-explanatory. Speaker 1 But you could actually come up with some activities that are out of the box, that are intriguing, where a person would go, whoa, what’s that? Well, obviously, you would have to know what that is because you’d have to explain that. Right. Speaker 1 So you’re pretty hands-on. Speaker 3 Yes, for the most part, yes. Definitely. I don’t play the piano or sing because nobody wants that. But I get them down there for the performances, and that’s challenging as well. Speaker 2 And how to play card games and stuff like that, which I really like. Because you’ve got to remember, a lot of these people worked, and so they had full-time jobs. So they weren’t back in Bewitched, like we’ve talked about, sitting there playing Bridge, right? Speaker 2 But it’s nice. She has that on the calendar. So if they’re looking, oh, Bridge, I don’t know how to play that. Speaker 2 And she’ll have them tutorials on stuff like that. Speaker 1 I mean, you talk about bingo and you talk about card games, but at a senior living community, remember, I mean, maybe it’s a little bit easier on a cruise ship, but you can’t quite do all those activities at a senior living community, right? So how do you see the role of activities then as it pertains to senior living? Speaker 3 How do I see the role of, well, like I said, it’s important to me that they come out and that they socialize. And it’s important to me. One of the challenges was finding that balance for residents that may be a little bit more independent and can participate and do things, as opposed to some of the residents that may need a little extra assistance to even get to an event. So I don’t want to be patronizing to any of the more self-sufficient people, but I want the other people to feel included and welcome and want to go to something and not feel like I can’t do this. Speaker 1 I’ve got so many questions. Okay. I’m sorry. You knew coming here, you’re stepping out of the frying pan and into the fire. Speaker 3 I wrote down a lot of things because I could talk about my job forever because I love it, but you’re going to ask me questions and I’m probably going to be like, um. Speaker 1 No, no, no. All right. I’ll be easy on you. Okay. Speaker 1 This time. All right. How do you come up with these ideas? Speaker 1 Anybody can come up with bingo. Okay. I don’t want to hear about that. Speaker 3 Well, like I said, a lot of things were in place already. I’ll give you an example of something. Facebook. Speaker 3 Facebook is a godsend. I follow all the senior living pages and all the things that are out there on Facebook. And actually, my son is a student at University of St. Joseph’s in West Hartford. Speaker 3 And they had a post about Tales of Joy, the dogs, the pet therapy dogs that came to the school for the students before their exams. And I reached out to my son. I’m like, I need to know who’s in charge of this. Speaker 3 Give me a contact name. And he did, which he never answers my text. So that was kind of nice that he answered me. Speaker 1 Because it wasn’t about him. Speaker 3 Yeah. And I reached out. He got me the info. Speaker 3 I reached out. And they came and brought Obi to visit our residence, a pet therapy golden doodle, I want to say. And, oh, my gosh, adorable. Speaker 3 Yeah. Adorable. I had a bell choir come in a few weeks ago. Speaker 3 I used to ring bells, hand bells at my church. So I had a little in way there where I knew it existed. And I brought the hand bell choir in on a Sunday afternoon. Speaker 3 And it was phenomenal. Absolutely phenomenal. Speaker 2 And the storytelling. Speaker 3 And the senior seminar series with the storyteller. That was a lot of fun, too, getting people to converse about their childhood. Speaker 1 How do you get an introvert more involved in activity? How are you able to pull that out of them? Or do you not let them come to it when they’re ready? Speaker 3 Well, it’s funny because a lot of things at the Heights are word of mouth. They’re dining together. They’ll talk about something they did today. Speaker 3 And, oh, that was really good. We’ll have to go next time. So a lot of things are word of mouth. Speaker 3 If I do have somebody, especially if it’s a newer resident, I’ve knocked on doors and said, come on, we’re going to go do this. I’ve done that. I will continue to do that. Speaker 1 And when you’re met with some resistance, how are you persuasive? Are you persistent? Speaker 3 It depends on the resistance. If it’s a medical reason, if they’re not feeling well, I don’t want to pry too much. I don’t want to be too intrusive. Speaker 3 But if it’s just shyness, you know, if I can’t get them to come, I’ll be like, all right, well, we’re doing this next week. I’m coming back for you. Just to give them a heads up that this isn’t over. Speaker 3 We’ll give you a pass this time. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 3 But just know this happens and you’re going to love it. Speaker 2 Trust me. And she finds out what they like as well. So she knows that she’s not just going to show up, you know, with painting for someone who may like writing or acting. Speaker 2 You know, she finds our planting. She finds out what do they like. So when she’s being encouraging, it’s because they like that. Speaker 2 And like she said, if they’re just shy, she doesn’t want them sitting in the room just because they don’t want to kind of venture out. Speaker 1 It’s so interesting you bring up painting because I was thinking of that a moment ago. You had mentioned some activities that may not require anything hands on listening to stories or playing with a dog, a therapy dog. But there are activities where it’s engaging, where you’ve got to be proactive and you’ve got a duty or a task at hand, such as painting. Do you bring artists in and a la Bob Ross, where you’re just watching somebody? Speaker 3 We do have somebody that comes in twice a month on Friday mornings and does its oil painting. And he brings all the supplies and they can go down to the hobby room. And, you know, they work on it each session. They don’t finish it in one session. Speaker 2 And then, you know, he’ll frame them for them. Speaker 3 And it’s just. Speaker 2 And then we have the paint and sip, the watercolor lady that comes in as well. Yes, we do that as well. Speaker 1 Are there favorites other than bingo? Speaker 3 There’s a lot of favorites. We have a lot of favorite entertainers for sure. Really? Speaker 3 That come in that are, you know, that people don’t miss. Like what? You want me to name names? Speaker 3 Well, no, not any. Speaker 1 Like, are they? It’s not the mafia. No, no, no. Witness protection. Jugglers, comedians, magicians. Speaker 3 No, singer. I have a lovely cabaret woman that comes in with her boas and her maracas, and she gets everyone involved, and it’s just… She’s good. Speaker 3 I will survive. You know what? The best part is just sitting there watching the residents interact with her and watching residents that you don’t… Maybe not see much communication with or much reflection. Speaker 3 They’re so into it. Speaker 2 And dancing, too. Speaker 3 I love to watch them have a good time. I love it. Speaker 2 She did an Elvis thing last week. She did Elvis last week. It was fantastic. Speaker 3 I’m a huge Elvis fan, so it was fantastic. I was singing right along with her. Speaker 2 And we have great relationships, too, like with Trinity College and folks like that that come in. And Playhouse on Park, the theater. Speaker 3 We do. Speaker 2 We host there. Really? Speaker 3 Look at that. Yeah. Speaker 2 We’re fancy. Speaker 3 Some of the actors stay at Avery Heights. Yeah, they stay at Avery Heights, and then we have tickets that the residents can go see a show. Speaker 1 Is there like a suggestion box? Like if residents have ideas themselves and say, you know what? Look into this. Can they do that? I hear it every day. Speaker 3 All the time. We do have a program committee that meets once a month. That’s really where you’re kind of Not always with that approach, though. Speaker 3 No, they’re good. They’re good. I love it. Speaker 3 I’m like, bring me it. Bring me everything. You know, I’ll just bring it. Speaker 3 But yeah, we have a program committee. We meet once a month and go over like, this was a hit. This wasn’t a hit. Speaker 3 This is what we’d like to do. See if we can go here. Speaker 1 What makes something a success and what makes something where you have a feeling? I don’t know if this will go over so well. If there’s people in the seats. Speaker 3 I always say when I have a full house, I look good. A lot of people that come to something. And again, it’s how you promote it too. Speaker 3 We have the calendar and then the weekly, which is a little bit more involved. And I put my signs up every day. And we have a new, I call it hoteling. Speaker 3 But it’s like Touchdown and it’s on your TV, your cable channel. Every day I put stuff in there and they can just go right on the channel in their apartment and see what’s going on. Inspirational quotes as well, which is kind of cool. Speaker 3 Yeah, that’s nice. She’s amazing, right? And then I just round them up in the lobby, too, if they’re all sitting around. Speaker 3 Come on, we’re going to do chair yoga. Follow me. Off we go. Speaker 1 Folks, I’m so engaged in this, I lost track of my time over here. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. She is the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Speaker 1 I’m Gary Byron. Our guest is Teresa Guerin. She’s Life Enrichment Director. Speaker 1 Are there favorites that you have? Speaker 3 Oh, my goodness. There’s some that I don’t like as much as others. Okay. Speaker 3 All right. I like the wee bowling. Well, that’s a Mark thing. Speaker 3 That’s not me. That’s Mark. He does the wee bowling. Speaker 1 What are some of the most successful ones or maybe some ones that you gravitate more towards? Speaker 3 I’ll tell you something that we have that I think is kind of unique, but maybe not. We do something once a week, and the residents want me to do it more than once a week. I just don’t have the time, but it’s called Word Games. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 3 And it’s so simple. I have a big whiteboard, and I put a word or a phrase on the board. It has to have all the vowels in it. Speaker 3 That’s the only requirement. It has to have all the vowels. And then they have to make words from all the letters on the board, and they love this. Speaker 3 And I’m looking up words like, how do you spell that? What does that mean? So we’re always learning. Speaker 3 Everybody’s learning new words during this time. It’s a good brain exercise. It’s a great brain exercise. Speaker 3 And we do easily over 200 words in an hour I have written on this board. Speaker 1 So I’m looking at this calendar for just for this month, actually, June 2023. Folks, this isn’t like an activity a day. I mean, this is a pretty filled schedule here. Speaker 3 We have a lot going on. And, you know, I’ll have people say, well, I wanted to do this, but you had this scheduled at that time. And I say, life’s about choices. You just pick what you want. If you miss out this week, maybe next month you’ll have something similar to that. Speaker 2 And there’s shopping trips as well, which is nice. You take the show on the road. We go to restaurants on Tuesdays. Outings like the cemetery, like the Catherine Hepburn Cemetery. Speaker 1 Oh, in Artford. Speaker 2 Oh, yes. Speaker 3 That was in Newington, I want to say. It’s on the Newington border. We just went to Iwo Jima. Speaker 3 Am I saying that right? Iwo Jima. We went to that memorial. Speaker 3 Have you ever been there? Speaker 1 It’s my town. Speaker 3 It’s very small, but it was very moving. That was incredible. We did that after our ceremony for Memorial Day. Speaker 2 That was tied it all in. It was nice. It’s nice because stuff is on the weekends, too. Speaker 2 So a lot of those trips are like to the symphony and that stuff is on the weekends. So the weekends, we don’t go dark and have a couple activities. And church. Speaker 2 And church. Exercise and different things. A lot of the activities are run by the residents as well, which is nice. Speaker 1 What are some of your biggest challenges as a life enrichment director? Speaker 3 Well, like I mentioned earlier, it’s finding that balance, getting everybody involved in something. Whether, like I said, whether they’re fully capable of going to an on an outing or whether they need an aid that they can schedule that aid and still feel comfortable going on an outing. I just want everybody to have something to look forward to and be involved in. Speaker 3 And I probably go from one extreme to the other with the residents. So that’s my challenge. I don’t want to be patronizing, but I want everybody to feel excited and welcomed. Speaker 1 Are you finding different people at different activities? Or is it the same cast of characters at every activity? Speaker 3 We have our core that go do everything, which I love. I mean, that’s what we’re here for. And then, you know, we have certain ones that are a little bit more choosy. Speaker 2 And it’s neat, though, because they might do that one thing all week. and that’s their thing. Speaker 1 All right. So a new resident comes in. Okay. Speaker 1 And they’re bright eyed and they’re like overwhelmed and they keep hearing about this food. They hear everything. They’ve already tasted it when they took their tour. Speaker 1 They don’t know anybody. I mean, this is a great way to actually get to know people. But in order for that to happen, they’ve got to take the initiative to come. Speaker 1 How do you break the ice? And I know you say, oh, you’ll knock on the door and you’ll give them a pass. I know you said that a little while ago, but how do you get somebody to do something that you know they would enjoy, but there’s still some trepidation, I guess? Speaker 3 Well, you know, Roseanne, our social worker who you’ve interviewed before on here, she does the initial, she’ll go to their room, she’ll present them with the activities and kind of go over the lay of the land and whatnot. And I usually run into them in the hallway or in the lobby or if I see them on their way to dinner. So I make sure I see them so that I can introduce myself and say, you know, we’re going to have fun. Speaker 3 So I’m here for you. If you have ideas and things, just let me know. But here’s the schedule. Speaker 3 Here’s how you can find out what’s going on. Speaker 1 And give me a dream activity you haven’t done. And you’re just like, oh, if I had it my way, this is number one. What’s a dream? Speaker 3 The casino? Speaker 1 Casino? No, I don’t know. Really? Speaker 1 What’s wrong? A day trip? A bus trip to the casino? Speaker 3 I’ll tell you one thing we did do in the past that I absolutely loved, and it was right when I started in this position, and I didn’t know what to expect, because again, I was new to the position. It was right after COVID. We had our Kentucky Derby Day. Speaker 3 And before that, I got the hats and the flowers, and I had a volunteer come in, and we decorated. We had them. We had them. Speaker 3 You had the mint jewels, yeah? My husband was the bartender. I’ll get to that. Speaker 3 I’ll get to that. But we decorated the hats. And I had like 16 ladies show up for that, which I had tears in my eyes. Speaker 3 I was so happy because I didn’t know what to expect. So we decorated the hats. They loved it. Speaker 3 And I think that was a Wednesday. And then Saturday was the race. And I have a very supportive family. Speaker 3 My husband and two of my three children came in and assisted. We had all kinds of games. And we did your horse name. Speaker 2 And so we had name tags with our horse names. Speaker 3 The ladies all wore their hats. My husband was the bartender and made mint juleps. And I had a bouquet of roses for the winner that picked the winning horse. Speaker 3 And it was just, it was a late Saturday afternoon and it was just lovely. That was my favorite so far. My favorite. Speaker 1 All right. So I’m running out of time. What do we have to look forward to in the future as far as, you know, coming events, maybe the rest of this year? Speaker 1 I mean, I would imagine there are seasonal events too. Correct. You talk about the Kentucky Derby and so on and so forth. Speaker 1 There’s summer activities, fall activities, holiday season activities. Speaker 3 We’re hoping to get out to the Lavender Farm. I think, I’m not quite Killingworth or Killingly, I’m not sure, but they have a lovely little lavender train that you can ride and go through the lavender fields. So that was something that the program committee wanted to do. Speaker 3 So that’s going to be new, and we’ll see how that goes. And then always the holidays, always Christmas time. I love, you know, this past Christmas we finally had our friends and family event that we hadn’t had for three years. Speaker 3 And we had Victorian carolers. We had my husband dressed as Santa. I hope the kids aren’t listening. Speaker 3 And it was just, it was lovely. It was lovely. Speaker 1 Well, let me tell you, it’s fantastic meeting you. I’m jealous, actually. I’m sorry. Maybe we do, let’s swap jobs for a day. Speaker 3 I love my job. Speaker 1 I know you do. How would you not? Speaker 3 I’m blessed. I feel honored to be where I am, and these are special people, and I’m grateful. Speaker 1 I want to thank our guest. She’s the Life Enrichment Director over at the Heights, Teresa Guerin. Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Speaker 1 Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right smack dab in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. Now, those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care and even more. Please visit AveryHeights.org or call 860-953-1201. Speaker 1 Again, that’s 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community unlike any other in Connecticut. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thanks so much for listening. Speaker 1 Until next weekend. Have a good one, everybody. So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. You will… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") ## [Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") September 5, 2023 In this episode, we interview CT Medicaid Specialists, Kristine Talarski, founder of Connecticut Medicaid Specialists on Medicaid eligibility, do’s and don’ts, and much more. Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ### [The Heights Senior Living Community - Continuum of Care - Director Bill Ingerhardt](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-heights-senior-living-community/) **Published:** December 16, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** If you or a loved one is hesitant about moving to a senior living community, ease your mind by listening to Bill Englehart, Director of The Heights’ Senior Living Community. Learn about how the right senior living community can open a whole new world of opportunities. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights is a 43-acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living memory care and a whole lot more. Now, this show will provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life’s journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Siobhan, good to see you. Hey. My microphone over here. It’s great to see you. How you been? I’m very good. Speaker 2 I’m very good. How was your week? It was phenomenal. We just did our veterans event. Speaker 1 Yes. Which was amazing. I had a great time. See, the food was awesome. Food was outstanding. Yes. You know, this is not like, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t even say it like this. This is not like food that you would think of at a senior living community. I don’t know. This was like five-star food. Yep. Swordfish. Speaker 2 Like a lamb. Don’t mess around here. It was good stuff. As promised, right? Speaker 1 You did. And you really, you made us feel welcome. You rolled out the red carpet, broadcasted live the entire morning show this past Thursday. Speaker 2 Yep. Speaker 1 And you had a nice ceremony for the veterans. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. All right. Congratulations. Celebrating my six months at Avery Heights as well. I’m the baby there. I’m the baby. Speaker 1 Six months. Speaker 2 I’m the baby. Yes. Speaker 1 You know, it’s fascinating then. Six months and you’re a wealth of knowledge when it comes to Avery Heights. Speaker 2 I stalked them for a while. Yeah. Speaker 1 You’d have to for all the knowledge that you have with it. You brought in a guest today. You want to introduce him? Speaker 2 I did. One of my favorite people, Mr. Bill Ingerhardt. He is the director of the Heights Senior Living Community, and he’s amazing. He’s been there a long time. Way longer than me. 30 years and six months. Speaker 3 Wow. Way longer than you. But the last six months have been the best. How about that? Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. You can’t get a higher compliment than that after 30 years. The last six months. It’s a dynamic duo, then. Speaker 2 Yes, we do have fun. Speaker 1 So you are the director of the Heights Senior Living Community. What does that mean? Speaker 3 So, well, thanks. And, Gary, thanks for coming to our Veterans event. It was an honor. I really appreciate it. We really enjoyed it. As the director of the Heights, I’m responsible for folks who move to the Avery Heights campus who are looking for independent living or assisted living. And that comes in a lot of different shapes and sizes. You can live in a cottage independently, really with no support but being on our campus. Or you can live in the Heights building, which is an apartment complex, where you can access food and transportation and 24-hour security and lots of recreational programming. Or you can add into that assisted living services, including help with medications, help with personal care. You can even have live-in help if you’d like it. So an entire range of supports. Speaker 1 Bill, how would I know which is better for me? Let’s say I don’t need assisted living with memory care or anything. I’m a pretty independent person. How do I know if the cottage is right for me or if one of the apartments is right for me? Speaker 3 Sure, well, that’s the perfect question. You know, if you think it’s time or if a family member thinks it’s time to start thinking about a community and you come to talk to us because our campus offers really the full continuum of support, Siobhan’s job primarily, my job certainly, is to listen and understand what challenges the individual is facing, what concerns the family member has. Once we know more about you, we know a little bit about what we offer, and we can try to tailor the package to what your needs are. We have lots of folks who move in to a cottage level requiring very little support. And then as their needs change, they move into the Heights building. They access additional support. Maybe they don’t want to cook for themselves anymore, so they come to the dining room. They come to the apartment to access the dining room. Maybe they’ve given up their cars so they can use our transportation services. But we can sort of, in discussions and as we get to know folks, try to tailor packages to what your needs are. Speaker 1 Okay, so just because you start off in one form of living, let’s use the cottage as an example. That doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re going to stay there for the rest of your duration at Avery. Speaker 3 That’s the important thing to know about Avery Heights for sure. There’s an entire continuum of care. I think you’ve recently talked to the director of our health care center. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, last week, yeah. Speaker 3 So what we can do is follow your progression of needs all the way through from independent living through assisted living to if the time comes that you really need a skilled nursing level of support, we can be there for you at that level too. Speaker 1 I imagine that you sit across, both of you, from all walks of life. And I know you customize around their individual needs. But there’s got to be a commonality that you hear from people time and time again. What is it that they’re looking for? What is that commonality that just, and there’s no room for compromise. They’ve got to have, this is so important to them. Yeah, they’re flexible on some other things, but not on this. What would that be? Speaker 3 I think the answer to that varies a little bit depending on who’s come to us. In other words, family members may have one set of ideas. The individuals may have a completely different set of ideas. And so you have to understand that dynamic, first of all. You have to understand whether everyone is being realistic in terms of what the potential residents’ capabilities are to live safely and to support themselves. I don’t know that that really answers your question, but… Speaker 1 You’ve been here six months. You just celebrated. Yes. 30 years. Speaker 3 Yep. Speaker 1 How long has Avery Heights been around? Speaker 3 Founded in 1957, a bunch of several, a group, I should say, of visionaries from local churches got together and thought they should create an area, a community where senior citizens could live in an environment that was conducive to supporting socialization and their own personal safety. That grew from 1957. That grew from a small independent living building to a skilled nursing facility, an intermediate level care nursing facility, cottages, finally the heights, which is Speaker 2 what we’re talking about today. I think it’s important to mention that I think at that time as well is that the times were changing. You know, back in the day, you were age out, you go to your kid’s house or they come to your house and stay with you. And I think the times were changing where no longer was that happening. And so I think that this group of people saw that and said, okay, we need to do something different. We need to have options and availabilities for older adults so they can have a safe place to go. Speaker 1 You know what struck me when I was at Avery Heights last Thursday? When I was a kid growing up, you know, you either, you went away to the old folks’ home. This was anything but. It was vibrant. It was lively. It was a campus. It’s not an old folks’ home. this seemed like a happening place to be and everybody seemed very happy and i don’t mean just the staff members i mean the residents on campus people who reside there at these cottages and inside um the apartment buildings how do you maintain that how do you or maybe a better how do Speaker 3 you sustain that well i i think what the message that both Siobhan and i try to impart on anyone who’s coming and thinking about living with us is the idea that on the one hand, you’re giving up your home. On the other hand, you’re opening up an entire world of possibilities. That your next chapter starts here is a saying we use on purpose because if you can convey to the resident that moving into an apartment means, yes, You can stay home and read a book all day if you want. But all you have to do is open your door to come out and meet 130 other people. At least one or two of them you’re probably going to like, right? I think more than that, too. Sure. So, you know, senior living is not about giving up things from our perspective. It’s about opening up worlds that were maybe kind of lost to you at a point. That’s a great answer. You know, so we think it’s important to come and look and see and feel, you know, what it’s like and then come with an attitude of, hey, maybe there is something here for me. Maybe there is something that I’m going to like about being here. Speaker 2 Bill. Go ahead. I’m sorry about that. I think also, too, it’s important to mention, and Bill didn’t give himself enough credit in the other bill as well, is that in our board and our president, Patrick, it comes from them. There’s a certain amount of caring and respect, and that’s another way that it gets sustained as well because the staff kind of takes that on. You know, management is so important. And when the person at the helm at the top is able to be that caring person and offer that quality of life and care, you’re around that and you’re like a sponge and you’re like, okay, I need to care as well because the upper staff, if you ever go to a restaurant and someone’s rude to you and then you ask for the manager and then they’re rude as well and you’re like okay now you know why yeah you know why it’s that concept of like it comes from the top and all the way up to the president i was at the golf tournament a few weeks ago and you know he came to check on me there’s this like i don’t even like 200 person or 500 person golf tournament and all of a sudden he’s standing behind me going how’s it going this is your first tournament how are you doing and i’m like i’m great but there’s 300 people out there that you need to check on but i was so that, you know, I don’t even know where he came from. He just popped up behind me, you know, and he checked on me a few times throughout the day. That says something. That’s the president of the company. And here’s all this big fundraising tournament going on, and he’s worried about little Siobhan. Speaker 1 But you know what? It reminds me, last week I was talking about the morale, you know, and you said it starts at the top. Misery breeds misery. Yes, of course. Yep. And the same can be said when people are happy. And appreciated. Do you ever work at a place, wherever? You don’t have to mention where it is. Do you ever feel like you weren’t appreciated? It has nothing to do with money. The salary is a whole other thing. Because there are people who make great money and hate where they work. But to know that you’re valued and you’re appreciated. And they look to you based on your experience. Speaker 3 If I could just add something that Siobhan just said. There’s another group that demonstrates their appreciation to us every day. And it’s a lesson I learned. I’ve been there for 30 years. Speaker 2 I know. So I’ve had a few different jobs. Speaker 3 But back in 2003, when I took over as the director of the Heights, I came back into a building that I had started in in 91. And some of the old residents were still there. And I’m thinking of one woman in particular who I had met in 1991 who had come to the Heights with her husband. And she had taken on the role of caregiver at a pretty early age, 68, 69 years old. So now 12 years later, I’m back in the building and she’s still there. She’s now widowed. But she’s jumped into a role of leadership with the resident council and taking over lots of different functions with resident activities. And early on in my tenure, I got into a little bit of a scrap with some residents over a particular policy. And she basically grabbed me by the sleeve and took me aside figuratively, not literally. But she explained to me that, you know, the role that I have is to try to manage a lot of different competing interests and reasons and interests of people who are living together, coming together as a community. And she said to me, you know, the reason they had formed the resident group was to help us manage the direction of the leadership. So I think of that every day. That particular woman sadly passed away last year. She lived with us for 29 plus years. She was an extraordinary woman. And I think of her every day because it really is what we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to get the community together, help them build camaraderie and fellowship, and then try to honor everybody’s wishes while optimizing their level of independence. Speaker 1 I think you’re accomplishing that, though. Speaker 3 I think so. I hope so. Speaker 1 And I was listening to you a little while ago, Bill, about the evolution of the organics and how you’ve grown. What would the next logical step be? Where do you go from here? Speaker 3 Well, we just took the most recent next logical step we took was when we created the Burnham Family Memory Care Residence, which is an assisted living level of memory care support. What you see over time in communities is that as people age, their needs change. And it becomes harder for some individuals to stay engaged and stay active without additional cueing and additional support. So we created, as you saw last week, a beautiful, secured environment where 20 residents come together in their own set, in their own environment, and enjoy each other’s company and have dedicated programming that goes to their own cognitive stimulation. So what’s after that? I’m not sure. Speaker 2 The patio. Speaker 3 What’s that? Speaker 2 The patio. Speaker 3 Well, certainly. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 In my opinion. Speaker 3 Certainly enhancing some of the amenities of the community is always a next step. Always a next step. Speaker 1 What then do you think is the secret to your success? The secret of your success regarding your campus, which is really in being around for such a long time. Speaker 3 Well, the campus makes a beautiful impression because, by and large, people don’t know that we’re there. We are hidden up on a hill at the top of Cedar Mountain in Hartford. People are genuinely shocked to drive up our driveway and find a very beautiful pastoral setting, secluded, quiet country setting. So that makes a great first impression. Then when they come in the door and they see the extent to which Sibi in particular, but others welcome them, and they see an active, vibrant community like you saw last week, you know, it’s pretty inviting. It’s a pretty inviting environment, I think. And I happen, as you can tell, I happen to like the food myself. Speaker 1 Everybody raves about the food. There’s not a question when it comes to the food at Avery Heights. Speaker 2 No. Speaker 1 Did you want to piggyback on that? Speaker 2 I just got lost in the food. I’m sorry. Speaker 1 That’s all right. And I could see how that could happen. 30 years. You could have easily gone to a competitor. You could have found your way working in another, you know, in a similar capacity at another location. Why? Why did you choose to stay at Avery Heights? Speaker 3 You know, Gary, virtually my entire adult life has unfolded at Avery Heights. I didn’t know it was going to work that way. I met my wife there. Oh, wow. Actually, I hired my wife. Speaker 2 Not me. No, no, I know that. You just got started six months ago. Speaker 3 And my wife, Jamie, and I have raised two children, now adults, both of them. Along the way, we’ve had some health challenges, And Avery Heights has always supported me, always supported me, given me the time I need to take care of things at home. You know, it lives its mission as a not-for-profit company to really take care of each other. And I can’t picture myself anywhere else, and I hope I won’t have to in the next few years. Speaker 1 Was it always not-for-profit? Speaker 3 Yes. Speaker 1 Day one. Yeah. Do you know the impetus of that? Speaker 3 Well, we were founded by, as I said, some founding churches local in Hartford, and every time I try to name all five of them, I forget one, so I’m not going to do that. Speaker 2 Don’t do it then. Speaker 3 Don’t want to leave anybody out. Along the way, you know, we no longer have official ties with any of those churches, but a good number of our residents come from those founding churches even to this day. It was always a not-for-profit mission just to serve the needs of the elderly. And I think we’ve done well to persevere in that regard. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning, Bill Englehart, director of the Heights Senior Living Community. You know, you’ve gone over a myriad of ways in which makes Avery Heights, or even specifically the Heights, stand out. But what’s the secret sauce here? What’s what really, I know you’re a non-profit. Food’s outstanding. But what is that element that, man, you just, I don’t care. Go look at everybody else. You’re not going to find this. Speaker 3 Well, I think I’m going to say there are three different items. On the surface of things, as people first come to us, one of the things they’re noticing is that we’re a rental community. We don’t require a large buy-in fee up front. That’s attractive to many people, not everyone, but it’s certainly a point of decision for a number of customers who are looking for this sort of living environment. The continuum of care that we have right on our campus is hugely important. When couples come, you know, most couples don’t age at the exact same pace. They see the need that at some point a spouse may need a different level of care. They see that driving and travel in the winter is not always conducive to visiting each other. At every height you don’t have to. Your loved one is down the hall, literally. You don’t have to go outside to visit when the time comes for people to separate and access different levels of care. I think the third thing, and I hope it doesn’t sound like a cliche, because in six months I’ve gotten to know and watch Sibi in action, and I think she really models what we try to convey to all our staff, which is listen. You have to listen to people. You have to hear what it is they’ve come to you for and then kind of help them sort out their own thinking, because in senior living we speak a little bit of a different language to each other, and it’s confusing. So people can say, oh, I want assisted living, but is that really what they want? We need to hear and listen to what the challenges are so we can get them where they need to go. And I hope people trust in us. I think most people have learned to trust in us over the years. Those are, I think, the three things. Speaker 1 Well, usually with any secret sauce, there’s more than one ingredient. Speaker 3 That’s right. Back to the food thing, aren’t we? Speaker 1 I just associate this. Is it lunchtime? My stomach is growling, so I hope it’s. I really appreciated the story that you shared. The woman who’s 29 years that she spent, and she just recently passed away. She started there very young. There’s got to be other stories that you can share, though. Speaker 3 I was just in the golf tournament that Siobhan mentioned with two of my residents, one of whom is 93. Oh, that was. And the other of whom is in his mid-80s, I think. We didn’t. We had a lot of fun. We didn’t win the tournament, but we had a lot of fun. Speaker 1 Look, as long as you had fun. I mean, winning is you can’t win them all. Right. Speaker 3 You know, there’s some Gary over the years. I mean, I’m pretty blessed. I’ve met some incredible people. No single one comes to mind as I’m sitting here with you right now. But, you know, we have a woman who’s one hundred and two years old who lives completely independently in an apartment. Speaker 2 she is extraordinary Speaker 3 she is Ruth if you’re listening we think the world of you you know we’ve had folks who have had a spouse move to the healthcare center which involves a walk down a hallway or two we have spouses that make that walk four times a day every single day they go to visit for breakfast for lunch for dinner they’re completely dedicated to the support that they can no longer individually provide but they know that the staff is providing so i mean it’s just it’s an amazing thing to see people Speaker 1 who have been married for 70 years you have a married couple that live there 70 years doesn’t have to be 70 years but let’s say one spouse needs memory care assistance the other one doesn’t Do they move together or are they separated? Speaker 3 Well, for memory care, they wouldn’t move together. The well spouse would remain in the apartment while the spouse who really needs the support of a dedicated memory care environment would move to that Burnham family residence that I mentioned. But there’s a lot that may happen in between those two points. There’s an ability to build in assisted living services to support folks whose dementia or Alzheimer’s is beginning to impact their lives or the lives of the couple. There’s a way to build in support short of moving the individual to the Burnham environment, but rather giving them the extra care, personal care they might need that an aide could provide, providing the med management and the medication oversight that a nurse would be able to keep track of, and then keeping those folks or that individual in a structured environment, in a routine in which they are comfortable and they can manage to get through an individual day. So not everyone who has a kind of dementia is automatically a candidate for the Burnham family residence. There are folks who, when that time comes, move into that environment, and they’re immediately engaged in a whole new and different set of programs and cognitive activities that we’ve seen folks flourish with. Yeah, big time. That’s the way in which Avery Heights has an expanse of a range of services that I think will keep people true to our mission to support their optimal independence. is we’ll keep them as couples together as long as possible and as safe as possible. That’s a priority. Speaker 1 Any last-minute tips for anybody looking for senior living? Speaker 3 Come see Siobhan. Speaker 1 Of course. That tip doesn’t get any better than that. Anything you’d like to contribute, Siobhan? Speaker 2 Yeah. I think when you’re looking, just make sure you look more than one place and just come to Avery Heights. Just see what we’re all about. I had a tour yesterday, a woman that’s actually been to all of our, you know, the various continuing care campuses in the area. And it was funny as she was leaving, she goes, I think Avery Heights is at the top of that list. And it was pretty nice to hear. And I’m not like this overly salesy person. I just showed her around, you know, and she kept on making her own reasoning and thoughts and so forth. And she met some people and we had some laughs and she was taking all sorts of notes. But it was neat to hear that, you know. And she might have said that every campus that she walked away on. But you never know. You never know. It’s just nice for her to say that. Speaker 1 It’s nice to hear. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 3 And if I could add one more thing, just to keep in mind that physical activity is going to be an important part of your life. And we have a full gym. We have the services of an exercise physiologist five days a week. We have a swimming pool. There’s lots to do there to keep well. Speaker 1 It’s not just delicious food. It’s amenities. Speaker 3 You got it. Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. For more information on today’s topic, the Heights history, please call 866-537-1444. Let me repeat that. Write it down. Ready? 866-537-1444. In fact, the first three callers are going to get a special lunch and tour of Avery Heights. Look at that. Yeah. And by the way, I strongly recommend both. Bring a doggy bag. Food’s delicious. For Siobhan Mattingly, I want to thank our guest as well, Bill Englehart. He’s a director of the Heights Senior Living Community. I’m Gary Byron. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Assisted Living, independent living, Memory Care, Senior Living --- ### [The “What Ifs” of Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-what-ifs-of-senior-living/) **Published:** December 14, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When starting the search for senior living, whether it is for yourself or for a loved one, there are many ‘what if’ questions. As we age, it is very challenging to have a crystal ball – figuring out what could go wrong, and how it will be handled. Listen and learn about potential solutions to answer the ‘what ifs’ and help ease your mind. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good morning, everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heitz, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. When starting the search for senior living, whether it’s for ourselves or for our loved one, it comes with many questions. In the industry, these are often called what ifs. As we age, it is very challenging to have a crystal ball to figure out what could go wrong and how it will be handled. Now, today in your next chapter, what we’re going to do is review those what ifs of senior living and provide potential solutions to ease the mind of caregivers and their loved ones. But first, let’s bring in Siobhan Mattingly. Siobhan, good morning. Speaker 2 Good morning. Speaker 1 It’s nice to see you. Speaker 2 It’s great to be here. Speaker 1 I can’t wait because I’ve been waiting and I’ve been waiting for weeks now. I’ve known that this show is in the pipeline and today we’re finally here. So let’s start with, listen, we got to start with the ground level here. Tell us about Avery Heights first, and then we’ll take it from there. Speaker 2 Yeah, awesome. So Avery Heights has been around for about 60 years. We’ve been around for a long time. But that’s great because then we have the experience, and clearly we’ve been taking care of people for a while. We are known as a continuum of care campus, so we have everything. We have assisted living, independent living. We have memory care. We have skilled nursing and intermediate care as well. So really it’s kind of that one move for your loved ones, and they’re there, and they can follow along the steps, and we’re there to take care of them. In addition, we have V&A and we have private duty aides also. So people really like that, that all the care is there for them and they don’t have to worry about going here or there. We also have a wonderful social workers and folks that can help out with the search and also help you out with once you’re there, you know, whatever your loved one yourself may need. Speaker 1 Let’s learn about Siobhan. Tell me about yourself and how you you. How did you get into this? Speaker 2 Yeah. So as most people, I got into the industry because my mom got sick. So my mom ended up with dementia. And I knew nothing about this industry. I was completely green. I was lost. And unfortunately, I got really taken advantage of. And financially, my mom got taken. It was a lot of stuff that went on. And so I’m in sales. I’ve been in sales for like 25 years. And so, you know, when I was taking a tour of the place where she ended up, the guy was actually moving on. He was actually being promoted. And I was like, wow, what you do is really cool. I was fascinated that he could do marketing and sales and help people. I’m like, perfect combination for me. And he was like, well, you know, my position is open. And I was like, really? And it was in West Hartford and I applied for it. And ironically, the guy who was the executive director, I worked for him at the farm shop. This is totally dating myself now in Bloomfield years ago. I remember that place. Yes. He was the regional director. And so he walks in the room and he goes, whoa, because I was going by Siobhan. Yeah. My nickname was Siobhan. So he didn’t put the two together. And I got hired like on the spot. And I’ve been in the industry ever since. And I absolutely love it. I love helping people not to go through what I went through, which was a lot. It was a lot. Speaker 1 Yeah. I mean, you don’t have to get too personal with your story. But I mean, to to to endure this, to watch somebody in their mind, you know, start to deteriorate. In a way, it’s good that you’re working in this field because you can relate to the average person who comes through the door and they don’t know what to expect. Oftentimes they’re in the beginning phase or stages of this. But I like when, you know, I remember once telling a friend of mine, I said, I love my dentist. And he’s like, oh, my goodness, I hate dentists all together. And I go, what do you like about your dentist? I like my dentist because he’s had five root canals. Seriously, right? You think that you should go to a dentist who has none, who’s never had a cavity. They know, you know, they’re the role model. They’re the ones that you should be, you know. He’s such a down-to-earth person. He says, no, I know exactly what you’re feeling. I know what you’re going through. And that was the purpose of me saying why I love my dentist so much. And I’m sorry to relate it to that, but it’s so true. Yeah, it is true. When there’s a person that you’re working with who completely understands every aspect of it, you’re actually able to do more than quote unquote sales. Right. You’re able to relate. Yes. And that, I think, when you’re on the other side of that counter, that’s what you’re looking for. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. And people do, you know, there’s a lot of guilt and shame when you’re doing this. And a lot of times people feel like, you know, they’re not doing their best for their family members. A lot of people are estranged from their parents. And all of a sudden now they’re thrown into being their caregiver. And I can relate to all of that. And it is nice for the person to know. They’ll start telling the story and then go, oh, you probably think this. Oh, you probably think that. And I always go, I’m not thinking anything. All I’m thinking is how can I help you? And I don’t want you to feel that guilt and shame as you go through this process. because really caring for your loved one, people always think, oh, I’m not really caring for them. Well, caring for them doesn’t always have to mean hands-on. Caring can mean making sure that they’re in the right place to be taken care of. And I think that’s the problem. People feel like, oh, I need to care for my parent, meaning that I have to be bathing and showering them or whatever it may be. That’s not true. Caring for them is making sure that they’re taken care of and other people can do that. And it really does take a team. You really need a team. Speaker 1 Well, there’s different levels of dementia. I mean, somebody could have dementia and the onset of dementia where they’re just forgetful, but they’re living independently. Yes. Sadly, it’s just going to deteriorate over time. But you get there progressively. It doesn’t happen with the snap of the finger overnight. And I would imagine that there are different levels of care. And we can get to that shortly. I’m going to ask him maybe a silly question. So I’m asking you for your forgiveness ahead of time. And in fact, maybe a lot of our listeners right now may be wondering this. But why is Avery Heights choosing to do a radio show? I understand some of your message, but obviously this is a lot more than just, oh, yeah, you need to be aware of this or be aware of that, to the point where you actually have a radio show. This is intriguing. Speaker 2 Yeah. For me, it’s almost on a personal level, too. Because, again, that knowledge is power. So many people go into this and they go into the wrong place, maybe the wrong attorney, the wrong assistant living, whatever it may be. And again, they get taken advantage of. It’s sad to say that people take advantage of people that are trying to care for their parents, an older adult. But it’s true. I mean people will put you in a situation where you have the wrong apartment, the wrong care, try to sell you a bunch of stuff that you don’t need. And it’s really sad. And also not give you all the information. You know, there’s a veteran’s benefit out there. And I’ve had people come in that have their loved one as a veteran and they have no knowledge of that. And they’ve been on several tours at other places. And I’m like, how can you not know that? Why would someone not give you that information? And that’s not all people. I mean, there’s some wonderful people in this industry. But like any industry, people get taken advantage of. And it’s a ton of money that people can waste doing that. Speaker 1 What would the average person listening to this right now, what would they be surprised to know about Avery Heights or about the type of service that they would receive from Avery Heights? And what would they be surprised to learn? What are some of the misconceptions, if you will, in your industry? Speaker 2 I think some of the misconceptions are that you, you know, I’m trying to have to think on this. So I think some of the misconceptions are that you have to have a certain amount of money. You know, you don’t have to have thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars. There are opportunities out there for financial assistance for it. There’s wonderful assisted livings out there that people can take advantage of where they don’t have to – they can take advantage of the federal money or state money and things like that. So I think they’d be surprised. Now, that’s not for our place in particular. I guess I’ve gone off. But I’m trying to think of what they would be surprised about our particular location. I think they’d be surprised that we do what we say. And I know that sounds really strange. And that’s what I like about working at Avery Heights. I’ve been in this industry for probably like almost close to like 20 years now since my mom was sick. And so I love the fact about working with them because if I say to them, we’re going to do A, B and C, we’re going to do A, B and C. But if we can’t do A, B and C, we’re going to own it as well and then come up with an alternative because we can’t be perfect. Right. Speaker 1 It’s not even so much of being perfect. Life happens. Sometimes situations are very fluid, you know, and as there there’s a lot of moving parts. And we don’t have a crystal ball. We can forecast. I mean, you see it on television every day. Tomorrow is going to be beautiful. Right. And by all indications, all these Dopplers that they have, oh, we’re looking at all these different models. And then you change the channel, and that weather forecaster says it’s going to be beautiful. Right. And what happens when you wake up the next day? It’s cloudy with a chance of rain. Yeah. So it’s everything. It’s, oh, there’s always moving parts. There’s always fluidity. And just when it looks like you’re going in one direction, life happens. Things get in the way and it ends up taking a turn and going in another direction. And I would think that it’s something that you have to be prepared for. Speaker 2 Yeah. And that’s really what I do when people come in for the tour. They want me to kind of have that crystal ball and I don’t blame them. But I’m very straightforward. I’m like, I can’t. They’re like, again, that’s where the what ifs come in. And I’m very straightforward with the fact that you never know what’s going to happen. And you have to be able to ebb and flow. But not only that, you have to give your loved one a chance. When people come in, sometimes they’re like, oh, she’ll never do that. Oh, she’ll never go for that. Oh, she’ll never move. And one of the things, sometimes I’m like, well, bring them in. And they sit down and the loved one’s there for the tour. And I take mom for the tour and she’s looking around. And I literally had the person sit at the table, the mom, and she’s like, well, what do we have to do next? Or whatever it may be, the mom or the person that they thought would never want to do it is the one moving it forward. And it’s always surprising to me. I just had this morning. I had someone who came and looked at our cottages, and she was just like – she was just so happy with the fact that, first of all, the other residents let her visit their cottage. There was also like – she unfortunately has cancer, and it’s in her mouth, so she can’t eat a lot of solid foods. So we always invite people to lunch. So our dining manager was wonderful. I was like, well, maybe we could do mashed potatoes. But then the dining director came up with a ton of stuff. Oh, she could have soup. She could have, you know, we can mash this up. She could have chicken salad. Oh, we can do this. You know, and she came over with this menu for this woman and she was just like, I’m saying mashed potatoes. She was blown away that the dining manager came out to see her. Speaker 1 That’s why she’s the manager of the dining. Speaker 2 Yeah. And so the nieces were like, oh, my gosh, she’s never going to move forward. It’s all speculative. Next thing I know, I’m getting this long email and she’s like, send me the lease. You know, so I think that always give your loved one a chance. assume, oh, they’re never going to go in the pool or they’re never going to do the art class because older adults, that’s where the next chapter comes in because older adults, I’m always amazed. I mean, there are some people that become artists when they get older and I’m talking not just like stick figures. I’m talking beautiful artwork or they start writing poetry or they start writing plays or they start working out. They start going swimming. They start doing stuff that people, you know, they say, oh, she’ll never do that. All she does is watch TV. Give your loved one a chance. My old boss, who was the one that worked at the farm shop, he taught me. He said, I remember one time I was maybe kind of giving up on someone. He was like, Siobhan, wouldn’t you want that, you know, when you get older, for someone to give you that chance? And that sticks in my head. So I always try to push it a little bit and go, you know what? Let’s give that a try. Speaker 1 Boy, if more people could live like that, where you treat others the way that you yourself would want to be treated. You mentioned something, though, and it sparked a question for me. The name of this show is Your Next Chapter, right? Why? Why did you name this show Your Next Chapter? Speaker 2 Because I truly believe in older adults. I’m one of those people that used to walk around, you know, Walmart or the store or driving and think that older adults just appear. It’s something in our head that’s just like this person was always like 80 or this person was always like 70. And as I started working in the industry, I realized, wait a minute, this person lived a whole life. I remember sitting with this lady. She was so funny. I mean, she was, you know, with the sweater, the whole, you know, old lady thing going on or older adult person going on. And you’re thinking, wow, she’s just a sweetheart. And she is. She started telling me, oh, I used to sneak into dances. Oh, yeah, we used to hide cigarettes in the little crevice of the fence. And she met her husband because he was out there smoking, too. And I was like, you know, because I asked her, how did you meet your husband? And I’m thinking I’m going to get this little sweet story where she was walking with the flowers in the field. Speaker 1 And no, she was like, oh, my goodness. Speaker 2 So she was a person. Speaker 1 Right. You know, I remember I was having a conversation with with an elderly couple one time and I didn’t know them, but I would see them regularly at a coffee shop and cute as a button. You know, they’re just sitting there all the time like, wow, this is you married. And I got to know them after a while. We’ve been married for, you know, almost like 50 years. And she goes, what would you like to see a picture of our wedding day? And I said, of course I do. She gets into her wallet. Siobhan, let me tell you something. The woman was a knockout. I’m like, so this is you. And I’m like, wow. And you’re right. We forget that they were once young. When I was a kid growing up, there was George Burns. He was an old guy. And then later on, I’d become an adult. And he’s around. He’s still an old guy. I think this guy just came out of the womb, an old guy. Exactly. Speaker 2 Exactly. And so you gained, for me, I gained this new respect for older adults. And I love hearing the stories. And I love, like, when they say, come on into their apartments, and I get to see, like you said, those photos. And your eyes sometimes are like, whoa. I mean, these, you know, they had this life. So that was, you know, chapter, you know, one through 30 or whatever it is. But it’s not done. You’re still here. We’re still here, and we’re still breathing. We have more chapters, and we have more purpose, and we have more life to live. And so the saddest thing is when, you know, you have these old stories come in and the older adults been, you know, especially during COVID, you know, sitting in front of the TV, you know, eating TV dinners or whatever it may be. And the happiest thing that I love is when someone comes in, they’re a new resident, and they have their first experience in the dining room. Because that’s usually like the first bring you out of your shell kind of thing. And I walk by the dining room and I look in and they’re sitting there sitting with maybe like three or four other people and they’re laughing. They’re eating their food and it’s just they’re engaged. And then every day you go by and maybe they’re going out in activity or walk and little by little they come to life. The best day is when they say to their family members, say they’re coming to pick them up for, I don’t know, you know, some holiday or something. Oh, we’re picking them up like it’s such a treat. And the loved one’s like, yeah, we’re going to stay here. You know, can you drop me off at two because they’re having the happy hour or they’re having a special function. And the loved one’s like, whoa, like I’m your special treat. And they’re like, no, no, I have a life, you know, and I want to stay here. And that’s what to me, that’s what gives me joy in my heart is to see them come to life and have those next chapters. Speaker 1 You know, the things we can learn from our seniors. Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh. The wisdom. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. And I’m sure this is kind of a silly. Of course you have. This is your wheelhouse. You sat you sit down with them on a regular basis. But, you know, one of the joys that I have had in my life and still do to this day is is interacting with seniors. Again, there’s a coffee house that I go to nearly every day. And I meet with different people there and so on and so forth. And you see a lot of the regulars. And let’s face it, a lot of the regulars are seniors. They’re retired. And the wealth of knowledge, Siobhan, that they possess. And you sit there and you don’t think that they can relate to you. But shame on us for thinking that because they’ll pick something up. What’s wrong? I can tell something’s wrong with you, Gary. What’s wrong? You look like you have a lot on your mind. Well, let me run something by you. And if I’m boring you, then I’ll stop. No, go ahead, Gary. Go ahead. And I’ll run something by them. It could be, let’s say, something at work. Something happened. Yeah. Hmm. I’ve had a similar incident. Let me tell you how I handled it. And they’ll tell me. Now, will it be on point 100%? No. Of course, every situation is different. But there’s usually a lesson that you can apply and you can learn from, you know, their experience and you can apply to your own, even if it’s just a portion of it, you know, and it’s often, Gary, the best, my best advice to you would to be, don’t be so emotional up front. Take a day. Don’t send the letter. Don’t send the email. You’re too full of emotion and you’re going to regret a lot of the things that you put in there. Take a few deep breaths, sleep on it. Revisit in a day, maybe two. And you’ll notice your tone will be a lot different. And you won’t have to make apologies later on that you said something that you didn’t mean. And I’m like, yes, you’re right. Yep. Maybe I shouldn’t send that email. It’s just, I’m sorry, I’m kind of getting off on a tangent. Speaker 2 No, I love it. I love it. It’s so true. I truly believe in that. And it’s almost like the, I think of like the sages, I guess, you know, the older people. People back in the day, like back in ancient times, used to go to the older people to get their knowledge. And now we don’t. Now we’ll go to some younger person, like our friend, and be like, and, you know, be venting. And then their advice is obviously, you know, skewed because they’ll be like, oh, leave him or, oh, do this or, oh, yell at them or, you know, something as opposed to like someone who’s going to listen, who’s been there, done that. Speaker 1 Right. You just said it. Speaker 2 And they listen. And they listen to what you’re saying and remember. Speaker 1 But you just said it. They’ve been there, done that. Your friend who is biased because they’re your friend. Speaker 2 Is your peer. Speaker 1 Right. But they may never have gone through what you’re going through. What a great book. Folks, you are, you’re listening to your next chapter about senior living. It’s a production from Avery Heights, by the way. We are talking to Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. What are the what ifs of senior living? We talked about that at the beginning of the show. I’m curious to know. Speaker 2 Yeah. So there are tons of them. I actually have my little notes here. So there are tons of them. You know, inevitably when I go on a tour and especially if it’s the whole family, you know, if you have all the siblings and so forth, there’s always lots of questions, which is great. Always come to the table, lots of questions. And then you start the what ifs. And it’s always I always feel bad because it’s like I don’t always have the answers, but I have potential answers, you know. So the what ifs is like, what if they have to go to skilled nursing? What if they run out of money? What if they need memory care? What if I need help? What if my loved one gets worse? What if I need additional care? What if they need therapy? What if I don’t ask all the questions? That’s the one that always gets me in the end. They go, did I ask all the questions? What if I didn’t? Their brain is probably saying, what if I didn’t ask all the questions? And they ask me, did they ask all the questions? And I always want to reassure them. And the thing that I love is that I feel like Avery has answers those what ifs. And that’s what I love about working there. So what if they go to skilled nursing? We have skilled nursing. We have a wonderful social worker, Roseanne, who can walk them through that process, help them through the Medicaid process, help them with the forms, talk to our skilled nursing. There’s a continuum of care where the skilled nursing folks will come over and do an assessment. So there’s a nice, smooth transaction. I’ve seen some of our staff literally have dollies moving people, literally helping them move because maybe the family is out of state or out of town. So that’s what I love is that there’s the answer to that question. What if you run out of money? That’s the same answer. We have intermediate care where someone can take advantage of Title 19 or something to that effect. What if memory care? We have memory care. What if I need help? Again, there’s Roseanne. There’s me. There’s the front desk. There’s our nurses. There’s our aides. What if my loved one gets worse? Again, we have those answers too. I mean we have a doctor that comes in and they can – it can be their doctor. They don’t have to necessarily – they can use their PCP or their primary care physician in the community, but they can also use the doctor that comes into Avery Heights. And that makes life easier for them because like in the winter especially. What if I need additional care? We have our own private duty aids. We have our own V&A services. And again, what if I didn’t ask all the questions? My goal as their first person that they meet is to make sure that I answer all the questions that they have for me and help them to come up with the questions that they didn’t ask. Speaker 1 How? How does Avery Heights, how do you answer their what ifs? Speaker 2 When you’ve been around, as long as I’ve been around in the industry, I’ve experienced so many different scenarios. And everyone always thinks they have the unique scenario. And I feel bad when I feel bad when they start talking about it. I’m like – in my head I’m thinking, oh my gosh, I’ve heard this before. And I don’t want to be rude and go, that’s not unique. Your loved one is not unique. But I have the answers in my head. If I don’t have them, I reach out to my other resources. And Avery Heights has been around for 60 years. We’re one of the original senior living communities or campuses that were out there. Now some people can say, oh my gosh, that means it’s old and blah, blah, blah. But it’s not. Avery Heights has evolved with the times. Sure, of course. and has become kept up with the times and kept up with the new stuff that’s out there. But there’s something to be said about that experience and that wisdom. Speaker 1 How does a person know that either they or their loved one is ready for senior living and that whole senior living community and experience? Speaker 2 Well, a lot of things is if they’re at home, if they’re sitting at home watching TV, If they’re not really out and about doing any kind of activities like they used to, they could be compromised in the sense maybe they’re not mobile anymore. Or maybe they are starting to have signs of dementia, so they don’t want to hang out with their friends at the senior center. So if they’re starting to just kind of isolate. If they’re not taking their medication properly. It’s so hard. There are so many medications. And if they’re taking things twice or not taking things properly, that can be a concern. Again, if they’re having mobility issues, if they’re not showering, if they’re not taking care of themselves, if they’re not doing their personal grooming, if they’re not eating right, if they go to the doctor and their sodium is off the hook because they’re having TV dinners or canned soup, that’s not good. If they have the need to – oh, if they’re not taking care of their bills. So if they’re not – a lot of times if something is not getting paid, their rent or their electric bill or if they’re buying a lot of stuff. A lot of times people unfortunately with – it’s so – some of these on television selling stuff. I don’t want to say the name of it like selling clothing or what have you. Sometimes older adults will stay up late at night. They have that credit card and they’ll pile up this stuff that’s not even open. You know, if they’re hoarding. Oh, hoarding, yes. Yep, they’re hoarding. You know, so those are kind of some of the signs that if the caregiver, it’s become too much for them. So, for example, if there’s a husband and wife situation and the husband or the wife are taking care of the person who is having some medical challenges and it’s just too much. If they’re calling their kids every day and the kids are having to come over because so-and-so fell or they’re wandering or whatever, it’s too much for that spouse. And what happens a lot of time is it’s the spouse that ends up either unfortunately passing away or having their medical – their health challenged. Speaker 1 And that’s really sad. When we talk about the signs, we could probably, and I’m running out of time, and there’s one more question I wanted to ask you, but we could probably do a whole show. I mean, I can’t imagine anything more important, I think, because it’s preliminary. It’s before a person even enters Avery Heights, signs that we should be looking out for. Speaker 2 Definitely. And don’t wait too long. Speaker 1 Well, yeah. Well, of course, for the reasons you just mentioned. Speaker 2 Yeah, because people try to push it, and when you push it, the person just gets worse and worse and worse. And unfortunately, when they get to the assisted living or the independent, they can’t really take advantage of what’s there. And it’s sad to see that when someone comes in too late because, you know, because the family and I get it. Again, that shame and that guilt. But you have to realize that you’re doing what’s best for them. The family member, there’s always that, especially from back in day, that threat of, you know, I don’t want to leave my home. I always hear that. And I get that. Who would want to? But as the loved one, the adult child or the caregiver at that point, you have to say, you know what? I know you don’t want to leave, but this is what’s best. Speaker 1 I’ve only got like a minute left. Speaker 2 Oh, sorry. Speaker 1 Can you just really quickly maybe give some tips for folks who are starting that whole senior living search? Speaker 2 Yep, yep. So definitely get professional help. Talk to the doctor, geriatric care managers, elder law attorneys, senior living advisors, financial planners. Try the website AARP. They have a really comprehensive list of questions, how to get started. Take tours and tour again. Don’t decide on your first tour because we’re all very nice people. Don’t get imprinted on the first place you go. Make a pros and cons list of each place. And listen to your gut before you listen to your wallet. Now, the financials is very important. Can I afford it? But go with, hey, this is the place that I like. And then go back to that person and say, hey, I like your place. How can we make it work? Before you go for the place that’s cheaper. or before you go for the place that’s down the street from you. And this is more talking to the adult child when they’re looking for their loved one. Try to listen to more what you actually liked as opposed to thinking of the financials to begin with. Speaker 1 Folks, if you’d like more information on this topic, a couple of recommendations I have for you. Number one, you’re going to want to tune in the same day, same time next week, and we’ll pick up where we left off. But I also want you to check out Avery Height’s website. It’s very simple. It’s www.averyheights.org. And Avery is A-V-E-R-Y. Heights is H-E-I-G-H-T-S. Averyheights.org. There’s also a phone number that I think you should write down. And maybe keep this in a drawer. Don’t just discard this. You’re going to want to keep this close. 866-537-1444. A very easy number for you. Again, it’s 866-537-1444. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening to your next chapter, Senior Living, an Avery Heights production. Until next Saturday, have a good one, everybody. 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Learn more … **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's, Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Caregiving, Financial Planning, Memory Care, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ### [The Blue Zones in Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-blue-zones-in-senior-living/) **Published:** December 15, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** The Blue Zones are areas in the world where people age gracefully. They live happy, full lives throughout their aging years. Listen as we explore the Blue Zones and show how moving to a senior living community can give you all the advantages of healthy Blue Zone living. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter of Senior Living brought to you by Avery Heights, along with Siobhan, Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. You know, we talk a lot about senior living on this show, and I figured we would spend a little bit of time this morning talking about the blue zones in senior living, which they’re kind of areas in the world where people age gracefully, right? They live happy and whole lives throughout their aging years. Now, in this episode of your next chapter, we will explore the blue zones and show how living in a senior living community can give you all the advantages of healthy blue zone living. Good morning, Siobhan. Good morning. Speaker 2 It’s nice to see you. How are you? I am great. Speaker 1 How has your week been? Speaker 2 It’s been good. It’s been good. Lots going on. Busy, busy. Well, good. Speaker 1 Is there a time before we get into the nitty gritty of this of this episode is this may sound like a kind of weird question because, I mean. People have birthdays year round and people they travel year round. But is there is there a certain time of year that you seem to notice an uptick of people looking into senior living? Speaker 2 Definitely. Yeah. After the holidays, any holiday, really. Really? Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, anything, you know, definitely Christmas, Thanksgiving. The weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas are just very busy because a lot of people go home. They haven’t seen mom or dad or their loved one in a long time. And all of a sudden they go home and they’re like, oh, my gosh, you know, whatever the house may look like. Again, we talked about hoarding in the last episode. And, you know, they call and they go, you know, I went home and mom, you know, barely recognized me or she was wearing the same clothes for three days or she’s not eating properly. And so that’s really and then Christmas and the New Year’s. Those are the busiest times. And then after that would be, again, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day. Anytime when people are going home for those big gatherings, that’s when we have an uptick because people realize that their loved ones, they’re going back to wherever, you know, Texas, Arizona, California. and they realize, oh my gosh, I can’t leave mom or dad alone anymore. And yeah, so that’s kind of our busy time. Speaker 1 I would imagine you’d notice that if, let’s say someone lived locally, and they would see mom or dad every so often and say, hey, we have the holidays here, why don’t you come and spend a few days or a week with us? Because we got the week off from work so we can spend every day with each other. And I would imagine the quality of care, it goes from a professional quality of care over at Avery Heights into, well, I’m going to spend a few days, you know, they’re going to spend a few days with their kids. And let’s face it, even though you’re physically home with your mom or dad and caring for them, that’s not what they’re training. That’s not what their background is. So they’re actually getting, really, with all due respect to the kids, I shouldn’t say kids, but the children of these seniors who end up going into senior living, they’re just not qualified. Speaker 2 No. And that’s a really good point that you make. It’s like, you know, when people say, well, you know, I can’t get my mom to eat or I can’t get my mom to do this or that. And especially if they have dementia or Alzheimer’s or any kind of compromise like that, you know, and I always say to them, it’s different when the professionals are doing it. because they know how to talk to them. They have the experience. First of all, they get to know them. They have a different, you know, they get to have a relationship with them, almost like a friendship. And then they might say, hey, how about a sandwich? You know, and so there’s a way that it can be done. And you’re right. Trying to, as an adult child, especially with so much we have to do, even if you’re retired, you still have so much life that you have to live. Trying to care for your loved ones, especially properly, is almost can be detrimental to them, especially if they have an underlying element that’s involved. Speaker 1 I’m going to bring up a scenario to you and you let me know if this is typical or atypical. Son and daughter bring their mom or dad doesn’t make any difference. Their parent into senior living. Every Heights. And the parent isn’t looking forward to it as much as the kids are. It takes a lot of the burden of caring for their mom or dad off of them and into professional hands. But the parent isn’t looking forward to it as much. They’re kind of going reluctantly. And then after, I don’t know, a few weeks to assimilate themselves and get used to the routine, they’re happier than they’ve been in a long time. In other words, do you ever take a kid kicking and screaming somewhere? They’re like, no, boss! First day of kindergarten. They’re kicking and screaming, no. And after a couple of weeks, they’re like, no, I have my new friends. I love my teacher. I mean, I don’t want to say how cyclical. We can have another whole show on that. Oh, very much so. But is that a typical scenario? Speaker 2 And it’s like the light comes on. And all of a sudden, it’s almost like they’re brighter. Their skin even looks brighter. And they just look better. They’re sitting up. I just had a new person that moved in. I think it was like May. And she’s amazing. um bright lady she was a teacher um and unfortunately you know she has some compromises and i went to go see her at her apartment and she was just sitting up and then she was just talking about all the things she was going to do and this one’s nice and that one’s nice and oh i’m going to dinner and you know um it does it’s just like again we like we talked about on the last show they just they get a life you know they they have that that next chapter and it is beautiful uh to see and You’re right. Once they get assimilated, once – like you said, change is so challenging. Speaker 1 At any age. At any age. Speaker 2 But really for – I truly believe the generation that people who are 80, 90, 100 right now, it’s really hard for change because it’s – I mean think about it. I mean we’re talking about people that maybe have been around for both wars, the big wars, the Korean War. They went through presidents. They went through fax machines to Walkmans to iPods to iPhones. That’s a lot. I mean, for me, I went, you know, maybe I was like the transistor radio to now. So, you know, it’s a little challenging. But for them to go from sitting around a radio to probably color television, I mean, that’s a lot. And so change is challenging. And they want to stay in their home. And I totally understand that. I would always say, you know, try to do like a respite stay, kind of give it a try. You know, you could do a 30 to 60 day respite stay. And normally after that stay, you know, we have a lady right now who’s moved, you know, she did the respite and she’s moving in. And it’s really because it’s that fear of what is it. Speaker 1 We all have that. Speaker 2 Yes. Because most older adults also, they dealt with what we call now skilled nursing home. And it’s not – I mean skilled nursing home is, you know, that’s when you’re, you know, your health, you need to be there for rehab or what have you. But assisted living and independent living is completely different from that. That’s literally, you know, like almost living in an apartment, a really nice apartment with meals and housekeeping and or like being on a cruise. You know, and I don’t think a lot of times those older adults don’t know that. They went to visit grandma or their parents or whatever in the skilled nursing home. And sometimes there’s that fear of that’s where they’re going. Again, not that skilled nursing homes are horrible, but it’s obviously it’s different from being in an apartment or being on a cruise. And so I think that that’s, you know, it’s just that fear. And so always, it’s always good to just give it a try. And I think for the adult child, the main thing is to keep that positive outlook too. You know, we can reflect on to our parents our thoughts. You know, it’s like, oh, she’s never going to go for it. And if you go in thinking that instead of saying, hey, mom, we’re going to give this a try and keep that light and airy instead of deflecting onto them, you know, you’re never going to do this. Or I’ve had – I’ve done tours where people are in the apartment and mom’s like, yeah, this is nice. And the child is like, are you sure? Are you sure? Are you sure? By the third, are you sure? The mother’s like, I don’t know. Am I sure? And it’s like once you get that yes, run. Speaker 1 And I’ll bet it doesn’t even take 60 days. No. I’ll bet 30 days is – A couple of weeks. Speaker 2 Normally a couple of weeks of just being around people, talking, being around your peers, being – we had a production of Wizard of Oz the other day. It was neat. And they were dressed. They had masks. Oh, my goodness. Oh, full Dorothy. Oh, my gosh. When I saw Dorothy with the dress, the shoes, the pigtails, and these are older adults. We have a theater club at Avery Heights. And they did a reading of Wizard of Oz. You had the lion, the scarecrow. It’s on Facebook if you want to check it out on our Avery Heights Facebook. And it was amazing. So to be able to sit there. And this lady that I’m talking about, she was in a theater group back when she was younger. And so for her to sit there and watch a production, all she has to do is go downstairs to watch a production. She doesn’t have to go out. She doesn’t have to get in a car. She doesn’t just go downstairs and see this, especially seeing people that she knows all dressed up. It was fun. And it was packed. That room, we had to go upstairs and get more chairs. It was so packed. Speaker 1 I love hearing stories like that. You know, at the beginning, I was talking about these blue zones. Yes. All right. So what’s the backstory first? Let’s cover that. What’s the backstory of these blue zones? Speaker 2 So the Blue Zones originally were way back. There was some research done in Italy. And they realized that people lived longer. There were mainly men that lived to be what they call centurion. So that’s at over 100. And so they studied them. Why are they living so long? And it’s not just about they were living long. They were living long and like healthy. They were like still walking for miles. They were still, you know, talking and giving wisdom and reading and doing all the things that you and I do at our age, you know. And that’s what was the question mark. Wait a minute. They’re not like aging. They’re still just like they’re, you know, you could look at them and maybe even think they’re in their 60s or 70s. The only way you know that they’re older is because maybe there’s a few more wrinkles and stuff like that. And so they studied these people. And then this great guy, Dan Bittner, created two books, The Blue Zones of Happiness and The Blue Zones. The nine places where people are living and aging healthy. And so I became fascinated with these books and I thought, hmm. I said, you know, when I start – and we’ll get into it. When we started talking about the things that these people are doing, I’m like, well, that’s what we have at Avery Heights. So I’m like, Avery Heights is like a blue zone. I don’t think we can be designated a blue zone. There’s a whole thing you have to go through. But there’s a few different places throughout the world. There’s some in Italy, the Greek islands. There’s some in the States, California. Of course, in Japan and Costa Rica and all these places have various things that these people are doing to make themselves healthy. Speaker 1 Well, OK, so let’s go there then. What makes them healthy and happier as they grow older? I love this. Speaker 2 So they move naturally, meaning that they have – they walk to places. So if I have to go to the store, like you and I will probably get in the car. And I think you were talking earlier when we were offline about going to the big Y or whatever. We get in the car. Well, they will walk to these places. purposeful exercise is great exercise so if you’re going to visit someone rather than walk there i often will like i live in west harford i’ll walk to blueback square to get pick something up at whole foods as opposed to always getting in the car so purposeful exercise built in naturally to your day as opposed to going to the gym is great there’s nothing wrong with going to the gym but also other exercise maybe at my job at every heights there’s stairs so rather than take the elevator, I will take the stairs. And it’s sometimes I’m five flights of stairs, I’m going up, but it’s good for me, you know, up and down the stairs, you know, so natural exercise, not necessarily always forced exercise. And again, nothing wrong with going to, you know, get your workout in the morning, but exercise throughout the day. And so they talk about, you know, also other exercise, it’s good for you, the more regular exercise would be like Tai Chi or yoga, going to the pool, obviously going to a fitness class is always great because you’re socializing. So that’s always good to do for 30 minutes to an hour a day. But also that natural exercise is really good. Purposeful living, having a purpose. One of the things I love about Avery Heights is that we have a lot of civic things that we do. So for example, the ladies, they made blankets. The knitting group made blankets for the kids at the Connecticut Children’s Medical Center. So that’s having purpose, having a reason. We have tons of committees at Avery Heights. And We have a newsletter. That’s run by the residents. We have this theater group I was talking about. That’s run by the residents. So all this stuff is run by them. We have a resident council. So that’s important. We have a welcoming committee. So they have a purpose. So when they wake up in the morning, they’re not just, you know, doing these activities like, oh, I’m going to breakfast or I’m going to do this. They actually have a reason. They have people that they’re helping. So that makes them feel like want to get up in the morning. They’re not just doing it for themselves. There’s a wonderful nonprofit organization, which we’re hopefully going to be partnering with called For All Ages. And that’s exactly what they’re about. They’re actually about another part is intergenerational socialization. So that’s another thing to not just communicate with your peers, but also communicate with other people, you know, young kids, preschool kids, all the teenagers, you know, maybe people in their 30s and their 40s. generational communication is super important, not just to be talking to someone who is, you know, like if I’m, I’m in my fifties. So if I’m just talking to people in their fifties, no, I want to be talking to all different types of generations. It makes you feel alive. Speaker 1 Well, last week, I think I was even talking to you about that. I don’t know if you remember, but I was, I was telling, I’d go out and have a cup of coffee. I talked to some senior citizens and the wisdom they have, I tell you there’s a lot that can be learned. Do you have to live in these blue zones in order to live the lifestyle? Speaker 2 No, no, you don’t. They actually, you can, like I said, a senior living community can do it, but also in your own life. You know, some of the other ones are, you know, get rid of stress, you know, belong to a community and then, you know, putting your loved ones first and being in the right tribe. So you can do that in your life. If you have this list, there’s like nine different things. They call them the power nine in senior living. You can Google this online. If you look these up, you can add this to your life. You know, moving naturally, like I talked about, instead of if I have to go to the Walgreens and I know that that’s right over in Elmwood, I could walk to that. Speaker 1 Sure. Speaker 2 You know, purpose. Make sure you’re giving back. You know, join, you know, volunteer for a nonprofit. Hospice companies are always looking for volunteers or at the senior center or at Avery Heights. We’re always looking for volunteers as well. You know, get rid of stress in your life. You know, if you can, you know, why are you cleaning your house? If you can afford to get a housekeeper, get a housekeeper. You can, you know, if someone says, hey, you know, we’re going to bring over some meals, let them do it. Take the help. Get rid of that stress. Speaker 1 How is living in a senior living community? How is it like living in the blue zone? Speaker 2 Yeah, really just like what we were saying. So it’s the activities that are there. It’s we have that’s the socialization, the exercise. We have all that. We have yoga and Tai Chi and strength building exercises. But also you walk naturally. You walk naturally to the dining room. You walk naturally to the exercise classes. We have a store there. You walk naturally. And we have beautiful grounds up there, too. The stress. We have housekeeping. We have cooking meals. We have all that. Feeling belong. You belong to the senior living community. We have cottages there, and they call themselves the cottagers. So now you belong to this group of people. You feel like you belong to someone. Speaker 1 So I was going to say, it sounds like Avery Heights is already working to incorporate all of these healthy habits into the daily lives of their residents. Speaker 2 Exactly. And that’s being part of a senior living community doesn’t mean you’re at the end. It means in some sense you’re at a new beginning. And like we were talking about earlier, that’s when that light goes on, you know, and people do. You know, we have people that come and, you know, they have, you know, dementia or Alzheimer’s or all these things that are happening. And sometimes, you know, if they went against into a routine and get rid of that stress, because a lot of times being in the home where you live for years and raise your kids for 40, 50 years, it can be stressful because you’re looking around going, wait a minute, I’m supposed to be cooking. Wait a minute, I’m supposed to be doing this. When you get away from that and all of a sudden you get into that cruise atmosphere, you relax a little bit. Sometimes things can get a little bit better, you know. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, Senior Living. It’s brought to you, of course, by Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. You can check out their website at AveryHeights.org. Siobhan, why is it so important to honor older adults like the Blue Zones do? Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s kind of like what we talked about earlier. I mean, there’s so much wisdom there. And I think that we don’t do a good job of honoring that. A lot of times we just want to put our older adults kind of, you know, in the corner or what have you. And instead of instead of making them more part of what we’re doing and, you know, they’ve lived, you know, such a long life. You know, when people in your 80s, you’ve lived 80 years. You deserve to be honored. You deserve to be listened to. You deserve to be heard. I think we were talking about earlier about kind of like the sages or older adults in many different cultures are honored. They’re seen as the, oh, let’s go see, you know, the wizard, the Wizard of Oz. He was old. Speaker 1 What a treasure trove of knowledge they have. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. And it’s sad to leave that knowledge on the table. I’ve had amazing conversations with older adults and learned so much. And just to calm down. You see, I’m like, I’m moving my hands. I’m a hyper person. And, you know, older adults, sometimes they just slow you down. I’ve gone for strolls. I’ve learned to stroll, you know, as I’m walking and I’ve learned to just, you know, if I’m walking with an older adult, I’m walking slower, you know, and I’m listening and I’m paying attention and it’s a wonderful break in the day. Speaker 1 What is that? I’m trying to remember the volunteer organization. Is it SCORE? What is it where the former business? Speaker 2 Oh, I think it is SCORE. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. It’s volunteer. I think it’s through the SBA. SBA. That’s right. And I used that actually at the West Hartford Library. They helped me redo my resume. And this gentleman, he worked for human resources. And let me tell you, for free, he redid my whole resume because he knew because he worked in human resources. So, again, that’s that knowledge that we’re leaving. Speaker 1 That’s my point. Speaker 2 Oh, my goodness. Speaker 1 Right? Speaker 2 Yeah. And how to raise our kids. Why are we not listening to our older adults about how to raise our kids? Speaker 1 Well, sadly, we’re living in a different era of technology that’s just changing rapidly. Speaker 2 But just that basic wisdom, you know, you know, she’s not listening to me or she’s lying to me. They went through that. They raised us. So maybe they’ve got a little knowledge in that. Maybe they know how to, you know, and I’ve, you know, my dad used to sit and talk to my son and such. And I used to be great, you know, and there’s something about an older adult talking to a young kid. You know, they’re going to listen. They’re going to pay attention. They’re not going to have that little little sassy going on. Speaker 1 I wonder, though, if there’s even that sense of family that you and I grew up in. There’s such different. Everything seems so fast-paced. And people to make ends meet, they’re working second jobs. One kid is in Little League, and they’ve got practice, and they’re running around. And it’s like we’ve got to grab something quick on the way. Where’s the family at the dinner table? I mean, and look, I mean, I don’t want to get off the path here. I mean, this is something we talk about on my morning show during the week. Yeah. You know, is I think a lot of the problems that societal problems has is because there’s usually a parent missing or or like I was just saying, the stress of the of the every day, the fast paced lifestyle that many people are are living in. What do you think about how older adults are treated here in the U.S.? Yeah. Speaker 2 I just feel like in other cultures, a lot of times older adults are just treated with more respect. You know, older adults are cared for. Again, we seek their wisdom. We celebrate. You know, we don’t celebrate getting old in the United States. You know, we’ve got cream. Why is that? I don’t know. Because you’re right. We’ve got creams. We’ve got running 50,000 miles just so that we can stave off getting old. And I understand now that I’m getting older, I’m like, oh, my gosh. But then there’s a beauty about getting older. There’s something about someone – you look at people – I’ve known people obviously for friends for a long time. And there’s something about some of my friends that I knew in high school. Now they were pretty in high school. But some of my friends, when I look on Facebook, they’re beautiful. Now that they’re older, there’s something about the aging of women and men that can be just amazing. And we don’t honor that. We’re slathering. It’s not embraced. And celebrities. It’s so sad. Speaker 1 That’s what I was – Speaker 2 Oh my gosh, it’s so sad. Speaker 1 You look at these magazines and these movies and it’s like, oh, yeah, this person is – they’re really 72 years old and they’re like, 72? Man, I don’t even look that good at 52. Exactly. Speaker 2 And it’s sad for celebrities in general too. Some of these celebrities that have really altered their bodies with plastic surgery and stuff and they just – it’s sad. Some of these really cute movie stars we knew growing up and it’s like you look at them now, they’re trying so hard to stay young. And I’m wondering what they would have looked like if they just let themselves age gracefully. And I totally get it. We have so much pressure to stay young. And I can imagine being a celebrity. So I’m not judging that. Speaker 1 Because if they can age out of it, they’re no longer getting the big roles anymore. So there’s not judgment. Speaker 2 It’s just true sadness that I feel that these are wonderful people. And they feel like they have to do all these nip and tucks and so forth just to stay young rather than just enjoying the beauty of our getting older and the wisdom that I have. I mean, I love being older just because of the things that I know. Someone will say something. I think you were saying earlier about we were laughing and you were like, well, don’t take that personally. And I’m thinking, I’m not taking that personally because I’m older and I’m like, but back in the day, I’d be like, I’d drive in the car home and I’d be like, why did he say that to me? I’d be in my head for like a day. Speaker 1 We’re also living in times where everybody’s offended at everything. So I’m like, oh my, sometimes we could have the same conversation 10, 15 years ago and nobody would walk out offended. Now you look at somebody wrong. I was like, what? What does that mean? I’m like, no, no, nothing. What are you reading into something? But what is your thoughts on how we can change this perception of our seniors? How do we change it? How do we begin that? Speaker 2 I think we, and I love this for all ages, nonprofit. And I’m really, I’m meeting with them in a couple of weeks. And I’m so looking forward to that. But we just need to incorporate with places like that. I think they’re, if you Google them, I think they’re located in West Hartford. Go to their website. You know, definitely get involved in that. Listen, you know, be more available to people who are older. You know, sometimes you’re in line or something and that older person is moving a little bit slower. Just stop for a minute. Say hello. Can I help you? You know, whatever happens to can I help you with your groceries or, you know, if your neighbor next door, you know, my neighbor next door, I love her to death. But, you know, I have to stop. I have to stop and say hello and talk to her. And, you know, I need to respect her because she’s an older, unheard of daughter. And celebrate getting older. Instead of these, you know, when you have your party, you know, I’m about to turn 60 in three years. And I’m not looking forward to it because I’m sure it’s going to be like, you know, black streamers on the wall, tombstones, you’re over the hill, all these jokes about, oh, remember the radio? Whatever these things are, rather than just celebrating the fact that I’m older. You know, I can have pink and purple and yellow streamers and I don’t need a tombstone on the wall just because I’m turning 60. Speaker 1 I find that a lot of our seniors, particularly those who have survived their spouse, are lonely. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 And you’d be surprised on how far a hello or opening the door. Now, listen, you should open it just out of politeness. Heck, I open the door for other guys. Yeah, you should. Of course. And there’s nothing to ever read into being polite. Yes. But you’d be surprised on how far a hello is doing or, oh, wow, I like that such and such. You know, that’s a nice color. I remember at a McDonald’s, a lot of seniors, they like McDonald’s. Yes, it’s affordable. Oh, yeah, it’s affordable. But they’ll just hang out there. It’s like an hour later, they’re milking that small. It’s like, you know you got free refills, my friend, but whatever. I can’t drink too much caffeine, Gary. You know, I’m milking it. Speaker 2 I love your older adult voice. I love that. I have to come up with that. Speaker 1 But I’ll just say something, you know, I’ll just say something about, you know, that hat that they’re wearing or something that’s like that. You know, oh, my goodness, I haven’t seen a hat like that. My dad used to wear a hat like that. Let me tell you, did you get it at such and such? And before you know it, you’ve got a conversation that’s already started. They appreciate that. Speaker 2 There’s a group at the Y. There’s a wonderful lady who actually goes to my church. She’s amazing. And she has started this little group at the Y. And that group, she basically, older adults will go, they have a table and they give away free stuff, mask and whatnot, or sanitizer because we’re in COVID age. And they’ll go by the table and the people will sit and talk for a while. And they’re almost like, remember Lucy with the five cent booth and peanuts? Oh, yes, yes. It’s almost like that. But they say now they have a line of people. And that’s something that, you know, we could start, you know, something. Start that at your local Y where you sit and talk to older adults and give them a listening ear. Speaker 1 I think you’re on to something. Folks, you’re listening to your next chapter, Senior Living, a presentation from Avery Heights. Folks, if you’d like some more information on this, and I can’t say I blame you, what I would suggest you do, like anything, is I would poke around the website. So let me give that to you. It’s www.averyheights.org. And poke around there. And then if you’re like most people, it’ll spark some questions. It’ll spark some interest. And that’s when I say be proactive. At least get some of your questions answered. Write this phone number down. It’s 866-537-1449. I’m going to repeat that and I’ll say it a little bit slower. I really want you to write it down and make the phone call. 866-537-1444. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening to your next chapter, Senior Living. a presentation from Avery Heights. Until next Saturday, have a good one, everybody. So long. 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Learn more … **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's, Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Healthy Aging, Purpose & Meaning, Senior Living, Wellness --- ### [Where it Begins: The Search for Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/where-it-begins-the-search-for-senior-living/) **Published:** December 15, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Beginning your search for a senior living community can be overwhelming. Listen as we provide tips and guidance, including important steps to take during your search. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights is a 43 acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now, this show will provide helpful tips and resources that will empower and encourage you each week presenting important topics and resources guiding you through your next chapter. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I am Gary Byron. Well, it’s nice to see you, Siobhan. How are you? Speaker 2 I’m very good. How was your week? It was awesome. I just came back from Maine. Speaker 1 You are kidding. Whereabouts? Speaker 2 I went to Wells. Speaker 1 well is that close to like Kennebunk or Kittery and yes Speaker 2 we actually did all of that we just you know Portland we did all of it we had so much fun Speaker 1 very nice yeah the beaches Speaker 2 are absolutely beautiful I heard Speaker 1 a friend of mine no kidding just this past uh was it last weekend last weekend she was in a gun quit Speaker 2 yes yep and then Speaker 1 uh some at Kennebunk and then they went to some of the outlets in Kittery Speaker 2 yes yeah there’s a lot going on Speaker 1 there and oh my goodness i heard all about this trip and i was jealous because i have yet to take here we are uh my goodness in um late july almost august now and i have not taken a vacation yeah Speaker 2 it’s a good place to go it’s like 10 degrees cooler there so it was a perfect time to be there because it’s like it was hot here everyone’s like oh it’s so hot and i’m scorching yeah it was nice Speaker 1 i’m so jealous yeah i got it i’m my own worst enemy no seriously i have the time people always I have not taken one vacation day yet. Speaker 2 Oh, you got it. Speaker 1 I know. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I did this. This happened to me a year ago. So finally the end of the year comes and they’re like, Gary, I’m not able to roll it over to the next year. So if I don’t use it, I lose it. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 So I’m like, I ended up just taking like every Monday off from like Thanksgiving on, like till the new year. You got to have seven days. Speaker 2 Thank you. Seven days. You got to do it. Because it’s that third day when you’re actually on vacation. The first three days, you’re just like, ah, keyed up from whatever’s going on at home. And then that third day, you’re like, oh. Speaker 1 That’s, I never looked at it like that. But once you said it, that makes, you’re 100% right. Yes. It’s just getting acclimated into the new routine. You’re getting out. Yeah, that’s. All right. See the things we learned here on this show. Encourage and empower. Speaker 2 See, we’ve done it. Speaker 1 What’s going on over at Avery Heights, Siobhan? Speaker 2 Well, as you know, I’m fairly new there. So I’m a couple months old. What I found out the other day is they have a brunch on Sunday. I love brunch. Remember Charlie’s Place in West Hartford? Speaker 1 I do. That’s now, was that the? Speaker 2 Hartford Health Care. Yes. Yes. Best brunch ever. Really? I never had brunch there. We have a brunch. Yeah. And coming up, not this month, but next month, we’re going to start to do little giveaways with our brunch. But we’re going to have carving stations and omelet stations and fresh Belgian waffles. And yeah, brunch is like. Speaker 1 Pardon me? Yes. Speaker 2 Oh, my goodness. Yeah, they do it every Sunday. Every Sunday they have a brunch from, it goes from, what does it go, from 10 to 2. And I’m like, what? Yeah. These are the things you want to know when I get hired, right? Speaker 1 How do you get invited to this gig? My goodness. Speaker 2 Yeah, so stay tuned. It’s going to be awesome. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 2 I’m very excited about that. Speaker 1 Well, I’m glad. Boy, when I ask you what’s going on, you went right for the gusto there. I know. It’s all about the food. You know what? Now, listen, these microphones are powerful. It’s going to be picking up the gurgling in my stomach now. You’re going to be like, oh, my goodness, Gary, did you hear that thunder? I know. Nope. Sorry, Siobhan. That’s just my stomach rumbling. You gave me away. Speaker 2 I don’t know. I don’t want to tell you about the lobster I had in Maine. Speaker 1 Well, when in Rome, right? I mean, of course you’ve got to eat Maine lobsters. Speaker 2 Lazy man, though, because then they soak it in the butter. Speaker 1 Lobster down here is so expensive now. Speaker 2 Yeah, and it’s a little tough. Just within one year. And it’s tough. It’s not, you know, it’s fresh up there. It just melts in your mouth. Speaker 1 I’ll bet. You’re not done rubbing this in, are you? Speaker 2 No, no. Speaker 1 I’m going to get this all show. Speaker 2 The brunch and the lobster. Speaker 1 You’re killing me. Oh, my goodness. If you’ve known how long I’ve been here this morning, locked up in this studio. You’re cracking me up. All right. So the search for senior living here. This edition of your next chapter, we’re going to be highlighting tips and giving guidance That’s when you are conducting your search for a senior living community. Okay, so let’s start here. Siobhan, what is your role in this process? In other words, how do you help older adults during their search? Speaker 2 Yeah, so I like to act as more of like a consultant. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 You know, my thing is I don’t, you know, yes, I’m marketing, I’m sales, I’m renting apartments, whatever, but I like to just take a step back and listen. And sometimes, you know, they’re not moving into Avery Heights and I have resources for them. So I don’t like to come off like you must come here kind of thing. And then I listen and it comes off a lot better. I mean being a consultant, it just – it works better for them. It works better for me. And it actually gets them the information that they need. Yeah, I would imagine. And so I definitely – yeah. So I definitely take that time to be that. And even if people come back like a year later, it’s awesome, or a month later or what have you, they’ll come back. And not only that, they refer other people because they don’t – no one likes to be like a used car salesman. I’m not selling cars. I’m not selling widgets. Speaker 1 That high pressure. So here’s our – here’s our – CDX. Speaker 2 I want you to sign right now. These are people’s lives. And I always tell them that. Oh, I can’t decide. Do I have to decide? Because there’s always a point in the tour where people get nervous and they think that – you’re using that language of in your apartment or just naturally you just do. And you kind of take a step back like, no, this is a big decision. You take your time to figure out what you want to do. Speaker 1 It’s such a personal choice, too. Oh, definitely. Speaker 2 Definitely. Speaker 1 You know, I mean, you want, of course, you’re talking about food, but you want the grounds. You want the accessibility to staff. Yes. But you’ve got to have that comfort zone. Speaker 2 Yeah. You’ve got to feel kind of that warm, fuzzy. It’s true. You know, you want to feel connected. You want to feel like, you know, there’s that whole situation where everyone’s just so friendly, like Fantasy Island. That’s what I always think of when I have a tour guide. Everybody, everybody, you know. And it’s not like that. I mean, you know, they come in, they take the tour, and we are who we are. Speaker 1 This is kind of off the beaten path a little bit, but it’s the first place my mind went to when you started talking about that comfort zone. Have you ever been invited to someone’s house? Could be the holidays. Could be a summer cookout or something. And you’re pulling in and go, wow, this is a beautiful neighborhood. Look, this is a gorgeous house. And you go in, and it’s beautiful. There’s no question about it. but you feel out of place. You feel, it’s not warm. It’s not inviting. It’s not the word, like cozy, warm and fuzzy and cozy. It’s beautiful. Make no mistake. There’s not a person that would say it’s not a beautiful home, but it’s not home, like home in air quotes. Speaker 2 You don’t want it to feel cold or sterile. That’s it. And you want to, you know, I have tours. Oh my gosh, I’ve had tours go for like three hours. And sometimes I’m juggling two tours at the same time because I have one that’s running a little over, but I’m not going to rush them out. I’ll go have some lunch, you know, or go check out the entertainment or, you know, sometimes people just stay for a long time. And I like that, you know, because you want to experience the community, you know? That’s great. Speaker 1 I’m glad to hear that. You’re right. This is a, this is a, you can’t make impulsive decisions. Speaker 2 No. And I don’t want anyone to move in and not feel like it was a good decision. I don’t want to, the last thing I want is for someone to, you know, rush into it and get all excited about it and then go, wait a minute, what did I do? I want them to make the decision. I’ve had people come back two, three, four times, bring more family members. It’s important. Speaker 1 Typically, how long does it take to make this decision? Speaker 2 It depends. Sometimes people are just ready. Sometimes they’re just, you know, I’ve had couples where one person is the caregiver, the other person is unfortunately compromised medically, maybe dementia or COPD or something like that, and they’re just ready. They don’t have a life. The caregiver doesn’t have a life because, you know, they want to be with their loved one. When you come into the senior living community, you have the opportunity to, you know, kind of get your life back as husband or wife or your significant other. You’re able to kind of go to activities, have dinner, you know, be able to have but also know that your loved one is taken care of, you know, by aides and by nurses. And you can even leave for the day, you know, go out on outings and so forth. And it’s nice because then when you come back together, it’s like it should be. You know, you talk about your day. What did you do today? What did you do today? If you’re sitting in the house, just the two of you, it’s like, what did you do today? Well, we watch TV all day. Or you know what I mean? And that person is not able to live. You know, they like to maybe they can still swim and games and make friends. But what’s nice is the couple can make friends together too. That’s a great point. Yeah. Speaker 1 Last week we reviewed this. But when is the best time you think it is to start the search? Speaker 2 Yeah. Kind of exactly what I said, that isolation. I really want to bring that home. It’s like if you’re sitting at home and the first thing you do is grab the remote and flip on the TV and that TV doesn’t go off till 9, 10 o’clock at night and you’ve been sitting there that whole time, then it’s time. It’s like we’re here for a reason. And if we’re still here, we need to go live our lives. You know what I mean? We need to be around people. We’re still able to offer conversation and information and just to be alive. I love, like I was saying before, the greatest thing I love is to see a new person move in, and especially a couple. And one couple is maybe at the music, and then one couple maybe comes back from the shopping outing. And they’ve got all the bags, and the other person – and they connect somehow in the lobby. And they’re laughing and smiling because they’ve had their time and you’ve had your time. And it’s just beautiful. So when you’re isolating at home, that’s when really is the best time, especially during COVID. So many people just kind of locked down. And again, all over the news, older adults can get it worse and it’s scary. And so many people just kind of went into their bubble. And unfortunately, that’s more detrimental to your health. We’re people. We need – we’re human beings. We need contact. That’s how we were built. We were built to have contact with other people. Speaker 1 Completely agree. Speaker 2 To embrace with other people, to conversation and to love other people. We’re not meant to be in isolation. That’s not our thing. Speaker 1 There’s nothing more satisfying than seeing a parent who is, like you said, is home. They get up in the morning. They watch TV from 9 o’clock in the morning until 11 o’clock when they’re ready to go to bed. And maybe they’ve opened the windows, but they haven’t gone outside. Or maybe they walked around the house just to water some of the garden, but they’re not driving. So they come right back in the house, and they make themselves lunch. and then it’s right back in front of the tube. Then maybe they read a little while, then they head right back into the tube. Like you said, we’re meant, your human beings are meant to socialize, and they’re not. And maybe their child or their grandchild calls them up, and they just keep them on the phone, because they’re lonely. They have no one to talk to. I knew a mailman one time who used to, he goes, Gary, the hardest time is, I’m timed on my route. I don’t mind spending an extra couple minutes and shoot the breeze, But sometimes our seniors will keep me there and I’m like, I got to go. Otherwise, it’s like a domino effect. They get home at 8 o’clock at night and they’re like, where were you? You’re supposed to be home hours ago. I’m talking to some people on my room. Yeah, okay, sure you were. But no, but seriously, and then they’re lonely. But then when you contrast that up against what you just described, where that very same person who seemed lonely in front of the TV with not much else to do interacting with people from their generation that they’ve got stories to share with each other. Speaker 2 Yeah. You go to lunch. I mean, our dining room, you go from your apartment, you go to lunch. There’s nothing like talking to somebody at lunch rather than talking to yourself. Yeah. If you’re knitting, there’s a knitting club. If you like theater, there’s a theater club. If gardening, there’s gardening. There’s, you know, there’s all sorts of stuff. There’s pool. There’s a putting green. There’s all sorts of stuff to do. And why not? Why not live a life as opposed to, you know, I want to be in my house? Well, I understand that. Well, I kind of understand and I kind of don’t because I think we’re just different generation. Like my house is wonderful, but my husband and I, like I said, we were in Maine and we were talking about, okay, where do we want to live? Where do we want to move? So we’re not as attached to our home. But I understand people that if you’ve been in a house for 50 years, your kids were raised there and all that stuff, of course you want to be there. But if it’s detrimental to your health, you know, you ask the question, when is the best time? If it’s detrimental to your health, to your full well-being, you know, spiritually, mentally, physically, all that stuff. If it’s detrimental to that, then it’s time to do something different. Speaker 1 And Siobhan, how often do you come across a scenario where kids, I shouldn’t say kids because they’re grown adults and probably have families of their own. Yeah, adult children. Adult children. Thank you. Adult children, yes. That for whatever reason, more likely work, but they’ve had to move away. And that doesn’t mean, oh, I’m leaving mom or I’m leaving dad back. Sometimes I don’t want to move away, but this is where my job has taken me. Why don’t you come? I can’t leave this home. It’s all I know. Okay. And you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. I’ve got to go. My job, I’m not saying it’s across the country, but it’s certainly not within driving distance. And then you’re constantly worried. Is mom, is dad okay? What, God forbid, if something happened at 2 o’clock in the morning or they fell down the stair. And how would I know? I’m not, I like to be driving distance, but I can’t. This is peace. This is knowing that mom, dad, they’re safe here. Speaker 2 When we have 24 hour receptionists, I was saying that earlier before we went on the air. It’s like, which is great. I mean, like, so 24 hours a day, if your loved one is there, you can pick up the phone and go, hey, my dad’s not picking up the phone or what have you. How comforting is that? And, you know, it is scary to think of what’s going on with my loved one, especially if they have dementia or Alzheimer’s or some type of medical condition where you can’t be close by. Speaker 1 Let’s review the suggested search steps, right? Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 So know what you need. So don’t just go out there and just go, okay, they need to be in assisted living or they need to be here or there. Know what you need, where location, what you need in terms of medical, what you need. And sometimes people like certain kind of food. Whatever these things are, make a list of that so that you’re not just going to all sorts of places wasting your time. I’ve had people go to like come to me and they go, oh, we went to 10, 12 places. And then they decide on our place and it’s like, well, if you kind of made that list, you knew what you needed, you would have narrowed that down and not waste so much time. So know what you need. Establish a budget. Look at those finances before – it’s like buying a car or anything. Look at those finances before you leave, before you head out and do your tours so you know. So you’re not sitting there and someone puts a rate card in front of you. You’re like, oh, I’m not sure if we can afford that. Well, you just wasted an hour touring something that might not make any sense. So know your finances. And if you’re the adult child, talk to your family member. Talk to your parent and say, hey, you know, can we take a look at your accounts and your investment accounts and how much is the house worth? All that stuff. Do all that homework ahead of time so when you’re out looking, you’re looking seriously and you’re not wasting time. That’s super, super important. And when I’m making these suggestions, one of the things you have to think of is like this is not something we do all the time. It’s not like we grow up and we go to the mall, we buy a dress or pants or whatever. These are things we do all the time. Senior living is not something we do and it’s not something people talk about. When do you talk about senior living? When you’re an adult child or when you’re older. Otherwise, you’re not thinking about, oh, how do you shop for an assisted living? It’s just not something that happens. So don’t feel threatened if you don’t know the steps. Again, determine that location and area. Where do you want to be? I want to be in Hartford. I want to be close to West Hartford. Wherever you want to be, determine that so that, again, you’re narrowing that shirt. List what you want and you must have. So you have what you need. So medically, maybe something that you need. Speaker 1 Oh, right. Speaker 2 But your wants and what you must have. I must have a terrace. I must have a two-bedroom. I must have – Do you have that? We do. We have two bedrooms. So we have that. yeah, I must have a full kitchen. I must not have a full kitchen. Maybe someone has dementia. I don’t, you know, if they do have a full kitchen, can they turn off the stove? So determine what you must, you want and what you must have. Visit the community’s websites. Don’t even, don’t just go to the community and do the tour. Look at the website, look at the pictures, look at what’s going on there so you can get some pre-information. Read the online reviews, like with anything. If you’re picking out a restaurant, you’re going to read the reviews, but read them carefully because sometimes people get angry and they’ll put something out there. Look at the response. See who that, if it says anonymous and it’s someone angry, okay, clearly they’re not owning their stuff. Speaker 1 Be careful with the reviews. These online reviews sometimes. There’s a restaurant that I go to all the time. I love it. It’s value. It’s a great meal and for the amount of money that you spend, it’s phenomenal. A friend of mine, I don’t know, went there. I didn’t like it, wrote him a bad review. That’s not even justified. Why would you write a bad review on them? Yeah. I’ve never had a bad meal there, and the value is out of this world. Yeah, I don’t know. Speaker 2 I don’t do it. It’s preference, too, especially food. I can see, like, reviews about, oh, the place was dirty. You know, like when I was going to Maine, we were looking at hotel reviews. So that’s important for me to know. But if you don’t like the color green on the walls, that’s not really – No, exactly. That’s a preference, you know? Speaker 1 And sometimes people are way, I’ve been to hotels where it’s like out of five stars, there’s only three. And I’m like, well, it’s the only choice that we have, babe. But they’re nice. Speaker 2 And I go, I’m like, where’s the three? I don’t understand it. Sometimes they’re better than some of the ones that get fives. Speaker 1 Right? Speaker 2 Five-star hotels, yeah. Speaker 1 I think online ratings are, maybe competitors write them. I don’t know. But I don’t put a lot of credence in some of these online reviews. Speaker 2 Some of the negative ones, just be careful. Because again, like you said, it could be someone who’s just angry. Speaker 1 Exactly. Speaker 2 Go and visit and visit again. So don’t just go tour once and then put that application in. Go come back again. Bring other people with you. Oh, good. Bring other people with you and ask lots of questions. There’s no stupid questions. There’s no, oh, am I asking too many questions? No. Ask a ton of questions. I mentioned last time AARP is a great place to get a nice question list, a really good question list, and ask the questions. And do a spreadsheet of your pros and cons. So, you know, get into I’m a big Excel person, but if you want to just do it on a notebook or if there’s some type of app or program out there where you can do pros and cons, that’s important. And list them all out on the paper and then make your decision. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter of production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community, along with Siobhan, Siobhan Mattingly. I am Gary Byron. What are some helpful tips? Like maybe you shouldn’t be doing. Speaker 2 Yeah. So don’t get swayed by the shiny chandeliers. There’s a lot of new communities out there. They got the big movie studio. They’ve got this. They’ve got that. It’s absolutely gorgeous. But you got to look at the experience. You have to look at if they’re especially if it’s brand new. There’s nothing wrong with a brand new community, but you have to look at the experience. The team hasn’t been together that long. So you have to really pay attention to that. Don’t get swayed by, oh, my gosh, it’s just because it’s about the care. It’s about the food. It’s about the activities. It’s about so much more than that. Yes, a beautiful, shiny community. If you’re into the glitz and glamour, absolutely. But go deeper than that. Don’t just be like, oh, my gosh, you know, because that can get you into trouble. Speaker 1 It’s like the person who’s selling the car and they washed it, waxed it, took care of the wheels. But I’m like, buddy, it’s still a piece of junk under the hood. It looks pristine, right? And I’m like, this car looks immaculate, but looks are only, you know, you’re looking at the car and it’s like, you know, people don’t really know until you drive it, right? That’s a, you know. Yeah, I know. I’m glad you bring that up, though. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 That’s a good point. Speaker 2 Don’t think about only your financials. I mentioned this before. So don’t think about, you know, oh, this is affordable or this is cheaper. Don’t just think about that. If you want the community, go back and make that phone call. Say, hey, I really like your community. How can we make this work? Because sure enough, people can do different things to help you out, whether it’s something on the rate or whether it’s a program that’s out there. Don’t just think about your financials because that can get you in trouble too. If you go for like the most cheapest affordable thing, but again, you go back to your needs and wants and all that and you’re crossing things off, that’s a problem. So don’t just think with your financials in mind. Don’t make that a positive decision because we can. Oh, my gosh. Oh, she’s so nice. We’re all nice. Speaker 1 If you work in this industry, you hope, you know. Speaker 2 It’s like that Lego movie with the police officer. He’s got the two sides of his face. He’s got the smiley face. Oh, right, right, right. The other side is like, ah. So just remember, there’s another side to that face. So don’t make an impulsive decision. Go home, think about it, and go from there. We just talked about this person you’re meeting with is a salesperson, so always remember that. Don’t go on your tours alone. Bring a friend. Bring a family member. On that, too, don’t take mom or dad, if you’re the adult child or your loved one, don’t take them on the first tour, especially if they’re medically challenged or have conditions. Don’t take them on the first tour because when you’re sitting there having conversations about their medical health over them, oh, she does this or she has this problem. And it’s the most degrading thing for that older adult, regardless if they have dementia and they don’t understand. They understand something. And so it’s always good to go on the tour by yourself, ask all your questions. And then that second tour is that VIP tour for your loved one. Speaker 1 Gotcha. Speaker 2 And they’re going to get wined and dined. And that’s the best way to do it. Speaker 1 So if you’re a caregiver or a loved one, what can you do then to ease the transition for the person that’s moving into the senior living community? Speaker 2 Yeah. That first one I just said, make sure that you don’t take them on the first tour. Have respect. there’s a human being there. There’s someone that made their own decisions, had their own thoughts, and so include them as part of it. Even if they have anything that mentally, you know, they’re challenged or what have you, still include them as part of the process because however you can, that’s how you can ease it. And then, you know, use… Speaker 1 Easing their stress. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Use movers, use organizers, you know, and different folks like that to get them involved. Speaker 1 How about this? As an adult child, how can you approach your parents or loved one with the idea of moving to a senior living community? I would imagine you’ve got to broach that delicately. Speaker 2 You do. Speaker 1 Maybe incrementally as well. Speaker 2 Yes. Yes. Take your time. First of all, let them listen to them. I don’t want to leave my home. I don’t want to be around strangers. Listen, listen, and don’t listen with the – don’t just disregard what they’re saying. Pay attention. Don’t push, but be firm. So you don’t want to be wishy-washy either. If it has to happen, it’s got to happen, but don’t be too pushy. Say, hey, let’s go have lunch. Hey, they offered us some lunch or coffee over there or whatever, and work with your advisor, the person who’s doing the tour, like I said, the consultant. Work with them to help you to create this VIP experience. Speaker 1 Listen, I know some strangers are strange. But there’s some strangers are just a friend you haven’t met yet. I mean, everybody’s. Exactly. Never met you a few weeks back, you know, and then look at us now, you know. So just because you haven’t met the person, don’t write that individual off. In fact, you’re a stranger to them and you’re a good person. And you know that. One final question before we wrap things up here this morning. What do you think is the future of senior living communities? Speaker 2 Yeah. Well, I definitely think it’s going to be more based on like having education, like a life. Like I love these ones that they’re starting to have where they’re part of a college. You know what I mean? Really? So they’re part of the university. So you can take classes and courses and yeah, and kind of be in school almost like in that senior living communities like your dorm. I think that that I think is an amazing thing. We’re actually trying to forge in a partnership with Trinity College because we’re right down the road from them. And so we’re trying to get that going. So I think that that – and I think that especially like in states like Connecticut, we definitely have to get more programs. It’s the people who are in the middle. It’s not if you have a lot of money or if you have no money, there are programs. Or a lot of money obviously you can afford at private pay, no money, there are programs. But the people in the middle, that’s where there’s a struggle. It’s like you only have limited funds. And sometimes you have Social Security. You do have some money saved, but it’s not enough to afford senior living. And so I think that that’s something. And I know there are several representatives and people in the government that are trying – in Connecticut that are trying to come up with these programs. But we really have to have something for that middle person who their finances are just so – you know, just – you know. Speaker 1 Boy, when you had my attention when you said like they can take a course or a class. Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 That’s art classes. Yeah. Sculpting or. Exactly. Speaker 2 Or history. Speaker 1 Gardening history. Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I like what I’m hearing. Speaker 2 I know. I know. I think that’s definitely going to be the future. We’re definitely going to have to get more robust with our activities because as people get older, we get older. Sure. We’re not as. Active. Yeah. We’re more active. We’re active adults. Exactly. Speaker 1 Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. Of course, for more information on today’s topic, where it begins, the search for senior living, please call 866-537-1444. Let me repeat that. I’m going to repeat it. I’m going to slow it down because I want you to write this number down. It’s very important. You ready? Got a pen? Got a paper? I can only stall so long. All right, here we go. 866-537-1444. It’s that easy. The first three callers are going to get a special lunch and tour at Avery Heights. Wow. First three callers. 866-537-1444. What a deal. That’s great. I may call. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. 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Listen and learn from expert, Bill Thompson, Director and Vice President of Avery Heights, as he talks about how these communities offer everything from independent and assisted living to a full range of short-term and long-term healthcare services. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights is a 43-acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Speaker 1 Now, this show will provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. From topics related to physical, emotional health, to financial health, and senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Siobhan, good to see you. Speaker 1 Hey. Long time no see, actually. Oh, my goodness. Speaker 1 Yes. You’re looking great. Speaker 2 I feel great. Speaker 1 You should. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 You were away for a little while. I did. I went on vacation. Speaker 2 I went to Disney. Speaker 1 I know. All right. So you had this big buildup. Speaker 1 We’ve known you were going to Disney a month before you actually went to Disney. Yes. So we’re all expecting a full report on this. Speaker 1 It was phenomenal. Speaker 2 It was phenomenal. Yeah. We had a really, really good time. Speaker 2 Lots of rides. I got to see Mickey, Minnie. Minnie actually liked my earrings. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 Very cool. Speaker 1 We know really you have this thing with Donald Duck, though, right? Speaker 2 He blew me a kiss. Yeah. My husband, like I said, he actually did get jealous. It was really cool. Speaker 1 As you should. Speaker 2 It was really cool. It was just me at the time. He clearly has money, right? Well, yeah, of course. I saw Chip and Dale. Speaker 1 The Chip and Dale? Speaker 2 Yeah, Chip and Dale. Chip and Dale. Oh! The Chipmunks. No, not the Chipmunks. Speaker 1 I didn’t… Speaker 2 Chip and Dale, two separate Chipmunks. Speaker 1 I’m not as familiar. Okay. They’re characters? Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 Yeah, I love the characters. My husband thought I was crazy. You need to grow up. I think I was more excited than the kids. Speaker 1 You’re a big kid after all. Speaker 2 I am a big kid. Speaker 1 Were you down there when they had that big hurricane? Speaker 2 Right after. Right after. After? Yeah. Speaker 1 Was there aftermath? Speaker 2 A little bit on the highway. Yeah, a little bit on the highway. Orlando didn’t get hit as hard, so there was a little bit, but not that bad. Speaker 1 Yeah, well, there were more inland. Speaker 2 Yeah, the good news is there were no tolls. Speaker 1 There’s no more tolls in Florida? Speaker 2 No, just after the hurricane. Oh, because they were out. Speaker 1 Boy, this is… Speaker 2 Just for the hurricane. And there were tolls everywhere. Speaker 1 Yeah, that I do. I was going to say, that’s why you threw me off when you said that. Speaker 2 Yeah. We went to International Drive, too. Oh, my God. Speaker 2 That’s where I used to stay. That is a dangerous place. The shopping is ridiculous. Speaker 2 There’s everything. Everything. It’s every strip. Speaker 2 Oh, that’s a huge strip. I mean, any store you could think of is, like, there. And it’s gorgeous. Speaker 2 It’s like, it doesn’t look the same. Like, H&M looked like a castle. It was, yeah. Speaker 2 It was very, yeah. Very dangerous. Speaker 1 You were there for a week, right? Speaker 2 Yes. We spent a lot of money. Speaker 1 Did you spend all your time in Disney? Speaker 2 A little bit. For the most part. My brother lives in Fort Lauderdale, so I went to go see him as well. Speaker 1 That’s a couple hours away. Speaker 2 He drove to us. Oh. Yeah. Speaker 1 Even better. Speaker 2 Yeah. It was really cool. I haven’t seen him in 11 years. Speaker 2 Oh, jeez. That’s not good. I know. Speaker 2 And he’s never met my daughter. Oh. So it was pretty cool. Speaker 1 This must have been emotional. Speaker 2 Yes. Yes. My brother’s very over the top. Speaker 2 You think I’m over the top. He’s more than me. And so my daughter was like, she backed up. Speaker 2 She was just like, because he was like, oh, my niece. And she was like, I don’t know you. Speaker 1 Did they ever speak over the phone or you speak of Speaker 2 she definitely calmed down pretty quickly. So she definitely got over it. Oh, this is the guy that sends me money. Speaker 2 I was texting her. This is the guy that sends you money. Smile. Speaker 2 I’m just kidding. Speaker 1 How old is your daughter? Speaker 2 She’s 13. Speaker 1 All right. So this is right up her alley. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 I’m glad she had a great time. Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh. It was so much fun. Oh, the weather. Speaker 1 Really quick. What did you think of it? Speaker 2 The weather was great. It was warm during the day, and it was a lot of walking. But the night was phenomenal. So worth it. I mean, we sat by the pool, and it was just like, it was beautiful. Speaker 1 When was the last time you were at Disney? Speaker 2 14 years ago. Speaker 1 All right. And what’s changed the most? Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh. Because of COVID, you have to make reservations for everything. And you have to kind of – it’s more planning. Speaker 2 When I went with my son, it was just, you know, hey, let’s do this. Hey, let’s do that. It’s a lot more – you have to be very strategic. Speaker 2 Is COVID really an issue there? It’s not an issue. It’s not an issue here. Speaker 2 We’re north. Yeah. But they definitely have the reservations. Speaker 2 They put all the processes. They’re still in place. So you have to kind of really plan out. Speaker 2 Like if you’re not up by 7 o’clock making reservations for parks and rides, you’re not getting on anything. Yeah, we learned that pretty quickly. Speaker 1 And I know if I remember correctly, you had this special pass where you could jump the line. Speaker 2 Yes, that was fun. Speaker 1 That made you really popular with everybody in the line, right? Speaker 2 It was like being VIPs, like being celebrities. The kids loved it. The first time we did it, they were like dancing. Speaker 2 And they were grinning and smiling. I’m like, don’t smile so much. Put your head down. Speaker 1 I’d be like, who’s this person? Who’s this person over here? Speaker 2 The best ride was the Avatar ride. Oh, my gosh. Speaker 1 I don’t even know. Speaker 2 It’s like a virtual reality ride, and you feel like you’re flying. Speaker 1 I just remember Space Mountain, and it’s a small world. Yes, that’s still there. That’s it. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 And they had this roller coaster down this pink mountain or something. Speaker 2 I didn’t do Space Mountain. I’m like, no, I didn’t do that. I did some of the rides, but I didn’t do it. The new one is Guardians of the Galaxy, and I heard the kids went on that, and that was crazy. Speaker 1 You know what I did? Talked on the radio every day. Speaker 2 Oh, nice. Oh, so yeah. Speaker 1 I haven’t been anywhere. Speaker 2 Do they still do that? Speaker 1 What? Speaker 2 Chips, because every year they used to do that at a station I worked at where you go down to Disney. Do they still do that? Yeah. Speaker 2 Things have changed. I know. There used to be cruises. Speaker 2 Nah. Oh, my gosh. Speaker 1 Nah. I’m in this bubble every morning. Speaker 2 Are you kidding me? Yeah. Speaker 1 That’s it. Speaker 2 It used to be cool. Yeah. I mean, not that it’s not cool. Speaker 1 You had a good time for all of us, then. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. Speaker 1 You brought a guest in with you this morning. I did. Please introduce him. Speaker 2 So this is Bill Thompson. He is the administrator and VP of Avery Heights. He’s quite amazing. Speaker 2 He does a great job, and he’s been there for quite a while. We had a good time at the golf tournament. And yesterday he was dressed as Forrest Gump and scared me to death. Speaker 2 He came in my office. I didn’t have my glasses on. I’m like, oh, my gosh, is this a new resident? Speaker 2 What is he doing? Speaker 1 His life is like a box of chocolates. Speaker 2 And he’s looking at me, and he’s showing me pictures, and I’m like, I don’t know. I put it up on my glasses, and I’m like, ow. Speaker 1 All I knew is his name is Bill because in order to work at Avery Heights, your name has to be Bill. Speaker 2 Yes, yes. Speaker 1 we tease. Well, to be a director. A director. I’ll get three directors and are all named Bill. Speaker 1 All named Bill. Yes. Well, Bill, welcome. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Tell us about you. Speaker 1 What do you do at Avery Heights other than you’re a director? Director of what? I’m a director of the Speaker 3 skilled nursing facility, also the VP of Avery Heights. I oversee 199 long-term and short-term care beds. I have 156 employees, 12 directors, and we have fun what we’re doing. I know that. We run a short-term rehab unit in which we’re very busy, do about 30 emissions every month, 30 discharges every month. We have long-term care as well, and we have intermediate care Speaker 1 for those who just need just a little help. I commend you, yet I’ve never met you, And I’ll tell you the reason why. From the moment that Siobhan had come onto this show and the guests that she’s had from Avery Heights, there hasn’t been a person who hasn’t absolutely loved their job. Speaker 1 So whatever it is that you’re doing, whatever’s in the water there, keep it up because it’s seldom where you find the morale that high at a place of employment. Now, granted, you’re working in a field where you have to love what you’re doing because, let’s face it, you’re with the most vulnerable portion of our population, right? And I would imagine there’s challenges. Speaker 1 Like every job has challenges, but yours, I think, hit a little closer to home. Speaker 3 Absolutely. We have fun every day because we love our residents. They’re our grandparents. Speaker 3 We are their family. So taking care of them and watching them have fun at the facility, it’s just amazing. Between like having children, children and elderly, they’re great. Speaker 1 How long have you been there? Speaker 3 I’ve been there a little over six years. I’ve been in the business. I’ve been an administrator for over 30 years. And I ended up at Avery Heights because of the facility, the different levels of care that we have. So I made the choice to join Avery six and a half years ago, and I have not regretted it. Speaker 1 I’ll bet. Speaker 3 What is a continuing care retirement community? It’s like a it’s a it’s a life care community. It’s a community that you could retire to. We have everything on campus that you need from cottages to independent living, assisted living if you just need a little help, to skilled level of care where, God forbid, you end up in a hospital or you’re sick and you need that extra therapy. We can bring you in and rehab you and get you back to your apartment or get you back to your cottage with continuum care from home care to whatever care you need. Speaker 1 Memory care, I’m thinking. That speaks for itself, but how does a person know whether they want to go into a cottage or whether they want to live, I guess, in rooms that are not cottages, right? Yes. Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah. How do you know where a person belongs or should be? Speaker 3 We have a nurse on campus that does the assessments. So if we have a new resident coming in to live, we’ll be able to place that resident where they will be safest. So if that resident is independent like I am, that I can do everything for myself and I really like a cottage life, maybe that’s for me. Or maybe I want to be closer and live in the independent apartment right at the Heights itself and be closer to the dining room. Speaker 3 Or if I’m a little bit forgetful and that I’m not safe to be on my own, Maybe I do need memory care with that assistance. So the nurse that is on campus will be able to assess us. Speaker 1 People can come and go as they please, right? Speaker 3 That is correct, unless you’re in a skilled nursing facility. Right, right, of course. Speaker 1 The levels of care that you were just mentioning in the assessment that is produced, who does this? Is this done in conjunction with family members of the individual that will be residing there? How is this determined? Speaker 3 Yeah, our nursing director and RN will be doing the assessment, but the family does play a big part in letting us know what this resident is capable of and what the person is not capable of. So both between the family as well as the nurse assessing, as well as the resident herself or himself, they can give us vital information as well. Speaker 1 You want to weigh in on this? Speaker 2 Yeah, I think it’s all about trust, too. Usually when I’m, you know, one of the first people that meets with them and my counterpart, Marissa, at the skilled side. And so when we’re sitting there, a lot of times families want to kind of hide stuff. Speaker 2 And we kind of have to build that trust to let them know that the more information we have, the better we can serve you. the better we can sue your loved one because it does no one any good if, you know, you’re not being truthful because we’re going to find out anyway because normally we send out a physician statement to the doctor. We get that back. The nurse sits there. You know, they’re professionals. Speaker 2 They’ve been doing this for a long time so they can see and read between the lines. And so we try to pull it out of them and make them feel comfortable. There’s no judgment. It’s not judgment. You know, a lot of times families are estranged or they haven’t seen mom in a while or whatever it may be. You’re living in Colorado and she’s here. We’re not there to judge. We’re here to take care of your loved one and to make sure that they’re safe, like Bill said. Speaker 1 Is it a lengthy process? Speaker 2 It can be. It really just depends. I mean, we can sometimes move someone within two weeks, but it really depends on the doctor, what’s going on with the person, if they’re in rehab. Speaker 2 You know, it depends on many different factors. Sometimes we have to get kind of medication regulated if they’re going into memory care. It’s more successful that way. Speaker 2 So they might go to like the hospital or to a gerry psych unit to kind of get that medication situated before they come into the environment because that way they can be more successful. Speaker 1 If there’s independent living and an emergency should occur, is there medical staff on the premises or is 911 called from an outside source? Speaker 2 It depends. So there is medical staff on – that can triage – 24-7. 24-7. Speaker 2 There’s medical staff as well as our front desk. That’s to me – the medical staff, absolutely, but the front desk is there 24-7 because they’re kind of almost like – and we have security. So they’re almost like the bird’s eye view. Speaker 2 They can be there to see it all. The resident could just call down and say, hey, someone’s at my door or hey, whatever’s going on. And they can feel that security that there’s someone there that’s going to pick up that phone as well. Speaker 2 And then the medical staff, they kind of command all of that. So if something’s going on, they would call 911. But nursing is involved as well, as well as we have aides there 24-7 as well. Speaker 2 So there’s always someone there. And when you go there at night, I’ve been there early in the morning or later at night. It’s just like it’s dark outside, but there’s people running around and moving around out there. Speaker 2 It’s a smaller crew, but it’s definitely not like a skeleton crew, which is nice. Speaker 1 You know, it’s fascinating because you’ve got food, outstanding, delicious. I’ve heard all about this. Security. Speaker 1 You’ve got medical staff 24-7. I mean, this is like a country club here. I mean, I think there’s a preconceived notion of senior living. Speaker 1 I hate to use that. It’s such a cliche. This expression is not your grandfather’s senior living. Speaker 1 I’m going back to like in the 60s or 70s, you know, where it was very like an institutional type of setting. Right. You know, this in you describing this morning and in the times in previous weeks, it really it sounds jolly. Speaker 1 It sounds like it really is. It’s very. It sounds country club is like, yes, I’m going to go do this now. Speaker 1 And then why don’t we meet over? And exactly. Speaker 2 Yeah. Especially for the I love to see the couples when they come in. They’ve been at home. Speaker 2 You know, maybe someone has dementia, the other person might have cancer or something’s going on. And they’re just that’s all they’re dealing with all day long when they’re at home. And then they come to Avery Heights and then they’re able to go to the social hour. Speaker 2 They’re able to go see music. And I love when the couples get together and they’re they’re in the hallway and they’re talking about, OK, well, I’m going to go back to my apartment and I’ll meet you down at the exercise. And they’re living a life and it makes it so they can have a better quality of life in a safe environment with people there to help and assist them. Speaker 1 What are the advantages then of continuing care retirement community? Speaker 3 The advantages are that we have everything under one roof. You don’t have to leave campus. What’s nice about it is that if you can age in place, so as you need the help and assistance, we could move you to the next tier. Speaker 3 Whatever you need, we have for you. We have a great dining room. If you want to go to dinner or lunch, you can. Speaker 3 If you don’t and you want to stay in your apartment or what have you, you can. If you want to go to activities, there’s always activities going on. So there’s a little for everybody. Speaker 3 We have out trips, a safe environment, safe community, and you build such bonds and friendships that you always have somebody there. Speaker 1 What if it’s a Sunday and you just want to put the game on, sit down for a pizza and have a beer? Speaker 3 And you can do that. We have small dining rooms that you can use. You can do it at your own apartment. Speaker 3 They’ll deliver that. So you don’t even have to leave. So, yeah, it’s wonderful. Speaker 1 Well, when I say country club living, I’m – it’s true. Speaker 2 It is true. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community with – Siobhan, our guest, Bill Thompson, Administrative VP of Avery Heights. Why is the continuum of care so important? Speaker 3 Well, first of all, you can age in place. You have a safe environment and it gives the families a peace of mind. The residents there have everything they need. So therefore, whatever obstacle gets in their way, we can take care of for them. Speaker 1 I would think that the biggest obstacle that they would have, and correct me if I’m wrong, you certainly know more about this than I do, is just taking that first step and having them consider Avery Heights or senior living. Because sometimes, you know, listen, I’m only basing this on my own personal experience with my own family members or friends and things where they get used to routine in the surroundings of their environment that they feel secure in. this has always been my couch this has been i know where the bathroom is and this is i know my neighbors over here and and oh oh that guy there mows my lawn every every and then and that may be good for the time being but i think you and i’ve talked about this in the past where as you age even more you know and if you don’t have family around some family live out of state some live around some may live close to their parents but may not be experienced in in caring for their parents particularly as they become more elder right um is it difficult to convince someone that maybe it’s the right time to make that move i could see you weren’t quite there a year ago but right now you should start considering that is how big of a challenge is that to have them Speaker 3 take that first step. You’re absolutely right. It is a very big challenge because they’re so used to their environment. What we like to do is invite them out for a tour. Meet the staff. We have a lot of longevity. We have customer service. We’ll make them lunch. We’ll make them feel at home. Speaker 3 We’ll introduce them to residents. Once they come up on campus and see the beauty of it, it’s sold. I mean. Speaker 2 And they’re with their peers too. So because the person next to them has just gone through the same situation. And they’ll tell those stories. Speaker 2 Like I leave them alone. I love leaving them alone. And I love the fact because, you know, there’s hearing challenges. Speaker 2 And they think I can’t hear them and I can. They’re like, my daughter dropped me off here. But I love it. Speaker 2 You know, and it’s so cool to see that. To see that they’re, you know, and they’re like the residents that are there are always like when I’m on the tour, they’ll be like, oh, you’re going to love it here. Oh, you’re going to love it here. Speaker 2 And I always do the little joke. I’ll give you your $20 later because they literally are like beaming, smiling when they’re telling the person. And they probably think, you know, you must be paying them, but they really are happy. Speaker 1 I just I’m envisioning this. And I truly believe that once they’re there, it’s all downhill. It’s all this is easy. Speaker 1 Once you’re once you see the surroundings, you know, and meet some of the other residents. It should be easy. It’s just getting them there. Speaker 1 Is that a challenge as well? or sometimes the older you get, the more stubborn you become as well. I’m not going. Speaker 1 Try it. There’s no commitment. We’re not signing any picks. Speaker 1 Just go. What have you got to lose? Hey, they’re going to give you a free lunch. Speaker 1 Walk around there. Spend an hour. Spend two there. Speaker 1 Do you ever want to go back? Don’t. But at least take it in. I mean, does it take that kind of conviction? Speaker 2 And I think that’s the good part about our campus is that we’re all just kind of chill. We’re just like – because we know we have a good product and we know we can help. But we don’t – we’re not pouncing on them. Speaker 2 You know what I mean? Of course I do. It’s like take your time. Speaker 2 And I have people that – I started back in May. I have people that back there now are – I’m getting that phone call. And like I do a gentle reminder. Speaker 2 I’m like, how do you want me to keep in touch with you? That’s what I always ask my tour. How do you want me to keep in touch with you? Speaker 2 How do you want me to follow up? And sometimes I might say, hey, I’ll call you. And I’m all right with that. Speaker 2 You call me. I think that’s important because it’s a big decision. But the one thing I will say, I’ve been there since May, and I’ve worked at a couple different senior living communities. Speaker 2 And I will say, you know, we’ve had people leave. They’ve gone to the next level of skilled or unfortunately, you know, they might pass away. But we have not had anyone leave to go to another community. Speaker 2 And I was looking at my stats, and I was fascinated by that because you always got to go back as a marketing salesperson. You got to look at your stats. And I was looking at, you know, why people left and so forth. Speaker 2 And I swear no one has left to go to another community. They’ve either gone, like I said, onto our continuum of care or maybe to our memory care or something like that. But no one has walked out that door with their suitcase saying, I’m out of here. Speaker 2 That to me is huge. Yes, I am actually. As you should be. Speaker 1 Tips. What are some tips that maybe you can give some people when searching for the right continuing care retirement community? What should they be looking for? Speaker 1 And what should be maybe a red flag? Don’t just run. Run away. Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, I think the biggest tip is customer service and friendliness of staff because you have to feel comfortable when you come into that facility and be able to see and the smiles and what we offer. If you get a bad vibe as soon as you walk through the door, it might not be the right spot for you. Speaker 3 Check out our food service. Keep your nose always open. Smell the food. Smell the hallways. Speaker 3 And lastly, you always want to check for hidden costs. We have no hidden costs. Everything’s up front, like Siobhan says. Speaker 3 We’re up front and we’ll tell you because we don’t like any surprises, just like the families as a residence don’t like surprises. Speaker 1 Maybe even talk to other residents. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Are they allowed to co-mingle with other people? Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. And I leave them alone. I don’t like if they’re starting to get a rapport with a resident or sometimes I might set it up, a phone call or something like that. I like them to be alone because I don’t want them to feel like I’m standing there so they can speak freely. I think it’s important. Speaker 1 Forgive me for this question. It just occurred to me, though. Do you have a welcoming committee? Speaker 1 Yes. You do? Yes. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. I’m talking about residents. Speaker 2 I don’t mean staff members. Oh, no. Yes, we have a welcoming committee, and they’re amazing. Yeah. Speaker 2 They put the bags together, and it was funny. They show them around, and actually they show them things that I don’t know because I’ve been there since May, And all of a sudden, one of our welcoming committee folks, he was showing them how to get back into the building through some side door or something, which I was like, where is that? Where is he going? Speaker 2 You know, and then I’m following along on the tour. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 It’s pretty cool. Yeah. Speaker 1 When you go into work every morning, are you just not amazed at how cohesive your programs, your staff, you seem so in sync with each other? Speaker 2 Yeah, we have a really good team. And our front desk is amazing. Tenere and Marsha, I’ll give you a little shout out. They are amazing. They do a great, great job. Speaker 1 I’m going to ask East this question. Sadly, I’m running out of time. We’ve got a couple of minutes left. Speaker 1 Why Avery Heights? And I say this with respect. There are other facilities that are out there that seem to be okay. Speaker 1 And there’s places we should stay away from, make no mistake about it. But why Avery Heights? Bill, you’re our guest. Speaker 1 I’ll ask you first. Speaker 3 first of all, we have such longevity of staff. We’re just going to do our award ceremony in December. We have a 35-year veteran. Speaker 3 We have four 30-year of service awards given out and many 20 years. I feel like I’m the new guy on the block, six and a half years. Not exactly, no. That tells you something right there, longevity of staff. Speaker 3 Nobody leaves, which is great customer service, great quality of care for all of our residents. We’re a four-star facility, according to Medicare.gov, and we have such quality of care that we take pride in. So Avery Heights, to me, it’s your home that you want to be at. Speaker 3 We make you feel like home, and that is such a big selling point. Speaker 1 That’s a hard answer to top, Siobhan. I know. We took all my answers. That was outstanding. I’m like, how do you top that? Speaker 2 Well, I will say, like I said, I worked for a couple other senior living communities, and we’re a nonprofit. And I think one of the things I love is that we’re allowed to care. Like I’m allowed to let someone walk out the door and tell me that they’re going to call me. Speaker 2 I’m allowed to do that. I don’t have to be like, oh, no, no, I got to call you. I don’t have to, even though they told me they’re going to call me, call them and email them and bother them, bother them, bother them. Speaker 2 I don’t have to do that. I’m allowed to actually take the time to walk a resident back to their apartment. I don’t have to always be marketing, marketing, marketing. Speaker 2 I can actually care. And that I love, that I’m allowed, that like no one’s going to come in my office and say, oh, you know, you’re not supposed to be doing that. They allow me to still be a part of the residents’ lives after they move in. Speaker 2 And I will say as a nonprofit, I’ve always wanted to work for nonprofits in your living community, specifically this one. I watched the girl, one of the girl before me, she was there 15 years. And I was just like, are you ever going to leave? Speaker 2 and then here I am so I’m really really grateful Speaker 1 you have a big event coming up right this upcoming Thursday Speaker 2 yes for Veterans Day yeah you’re going to be there Speaker 1 I’ll be broadcasting the morning show Speaker 2 live from there we’re unveiling our Veterans Wall it’s actually already up on the wall it’s all covered I got to see it it looks amazing we’re really excited can’t wait Speaker 1 Jimmy J on my producer yes Speaker 2 he’s handed out 20 years in the Marine Corps Speaker 1 he’ll be there as well I gotta get there early though I gotta get there shortly Speaker 2 five yeah i’m only nine minutes away i’m so excited i used to work up in the berkshires two and a half hours i’m like nine minutes away i might be in jeans just you know you and me both Speaker 1 you and me both sure folks you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter senior living with avery heights for more information on today’s topic uh continuing care retirement community, please call them. 866-537-1444. I’ll repeat that phone number. Speaker 1 866-537-1444. In fact, the first three callers will get a special lunch and tour at Avery Heights. And I’ve heard so much about this food. Speaker 1 Don’t you know I’m taking you up on that when I see it Thursday night? They’re having lamb, actually, like a lamb. Is that right? Speaker 1 Yeah. I want to thank our guest this morning, Bill Thompson, Administrator VP of Avery Heights. Thanks for being with us this morning. Speaker 3 It was my appreciation. Thank you for having me. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Until next weekend, thanks for listening. Have a good one, everybody. So long. Legenda Adriana Zanott. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Assisted Living, Financial Planning, independent living, Memory Care, Senior Living --- ### [Answers to Important Questions: Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/memory-care-when-its-time-what-to-look-for/) **Published:** December 19, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** The possibility that a loved one may be developing Alzheimer’s disease or another memory impairment can feel overwhelming. With age, a reduction in cognitive ability naturally occurs, but more significant declines in memory are cause for concern. Moreover, if you are already caring for someone with a progressive neurodegenerative condition, you understand how challenging it can be. Given the physical and emotional toll of such a responsibility can cause many challenges for a caregiver; it is no surprise that many begin to seek out options for support. This episode we have a [special guest](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/special-guest-beth-robbins/) The Heights Memory Care Director Holly Taylor-Fry who will be providing expert advice and guidance to help keep those in need informed as they search for the best possible options. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good weekend to you everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights, they are a 43-acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and more. Speaker 1 Now, this show will help provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. Topics related to physical and emotional health, could be financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Siobhan, good morning. Good morning. How are you? Speaker 2 I’m phenomenal. Speaker 1 I’m glad to hear that. It’s the season, right? Speaker 2 How was your Thanksgiving? Oh my gosh, I cooked. I love to cook. Speaker 1 Well, that’s your holiday then. Speaker 2 It’s so weird. It’s like I didn’t realize how much I love it, but the thing is, it’s timing. I haven’t cooked Thanksgiving dinner in probably, I don’t know, five or six years. Speaker 2 You got to get up early in the morning to put a turkey in, right? Actually, nowadays, it’s like two days before because you have to brine the turkey. And that is the key. Speaker 2 My son is an amazing cook. And brining is the key. And it came out amazing. Speaker 2 Like, you know, the white meat? Dark meat is always like moist and fresh or whatever. But everyone loved it. Speaker 2 I mean, they came back for thirds. Thirds? Literally, my husband’s cousin was like, I’m just going to get some more. Speaker 2 Is that okay? Like, he asked me for thirds. How many people did you host? Speaker 2 17\. Oh, I remember you telling me that last week. 20-pound turkey, yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah, it was phenomenal. It was so much fun. Speaker 2 I’m cooking next year. I want to do add a brisket next year. I’m really excited. Speaker 2 Yeah. A brisket? Yeah. Speaker 2 I want to get a smoker. Yeah. Speaker 1 I’m out of control. 17, yeah. I mean, where does it end? Speaker 2 Actually, I’m mentioning that on the radio on purpose. So I want to get a smoker. Hopefully my family’s listening. Smoker. Speaker 1 Christmas is coming, by the way. Hint, hint. Speaker 2 Mommy, grandma, auntie. Speaker 1 You can only make so much food. Speaker 2 I mean, there’s going to come a point where it’s like, I can’t eat all this. Well, actually, we didn’t have a lot of leftovers. We really didn’t. Actually, no. We had mashed potatoes. Speaker 2 We went a little overboard on the mashed potatoes. But that was it. Everything else was gone. Speaker 2 Yeah, very little. Oh, my goodness. Yeah. Speaker 1 I’m going to add a brisket. Speaker 2 17 people next year, too? Probably actually more. Oh, my God. Speaker 1 Yeah. You just keep piling it on, Siobhan. Oh, my goodness. Speaker 2 I know. I do love it, though. It’s just, like I said, it’s all about time. Speaker 2 It’s like the stress of the time. But I just kind of chilled and said, you know what? Whatever happens, whatever comes out, it comes out. Speaker 2 And if it comes out good, good. If it doesn’t, oh, well. Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 I actually took pictures of my food. I became one of those people. I couldn’t help it. Speaker 2 I was talking to my sister, and I’m like, this looks so good. She goes, take a picture of what I did. And I sent it to a bunch of people. Speaker 1 So brisket and so more food and more people next year. Yes. This is what happens when you become a victim of your own success. Speaker 1 Yes. You’re going to keep raising the bar. Exactly. Speaker 1 How far can I push myself, right? Speaker 2 I know. I keep threatening to get a food truck, which is like crazy. Yeah. Speaker 1 Like you have no extra, you know, all this available time. Speaker 2 Well, my son’s a good cook. He’s a really good cook. Speaker 1 But does your son have a career? Speaker 2 Yeah, he does. Yeah, he works for an app company. Yeah, he does. Speaker 2 But he loves to cook as well. He cooked as well. And we compete with each other. Speaker 2 So he thinks his turkey was better than mine. And I was like, dude, my turkey was halfway gone. Speaker 1 I think we should call it Food Network here. Speaker 2 I know. Speaker 1 It’s going to be like family battles who cooks better. and who cooks. Speaker 2 We’re doing a cooking competition, actually, at the community in June, a celebrity cooking competition, which you’re judging. I’m judging. You’re judging. Speaker 1 I didn’t know that. Speaker 2 No, I’ve said it. You have to do it. I did that to you with the remote. Speaker 2 Remember last time? I was like, oh, you’re going to be there. It’s a good way to find this out, right? Speaker 2 Exactly. Okay. All right. Speaker 2 When in June? I don’t know yet. I got to come up with a date and I want to have different celebrities. Speaker 2 And actually, I might have my son come up and cook and be, they’re going to be teams. So it’s going to be like one kind of novice kind of home cook and then like a celebrity. they’re going to be cooking uh tim is going to decide and the fun part is whoever wins the competition their meal will be on the menu so it’s going to be um what is the appetizer um you know the main entree and dessert and whoever wins those their whatever their dish will be on our actual Speaker 1 menu i like this hey before we get into um today’s topic talk quickly talk quickly about memory lane Excuse me, Memory Cafe. Memory Lane Cafe. That’s actually not a bad name. Memory Lane Cafe. Speaker 2 That’s actually not a bad name. Speaker 1 Where they remember how you take your coffee. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 Every time you come in. Speaker 2 We’re really excited. It’s actually a national concept, so it’s not mine. I didn’t invent it. Speaker 2 And it’s where caregivers and your loved one that has dementia or Alzheimer’s, it can be early on, but mid-stages works as well. They come on into our community. It’s completely free. Speaker 2 We’re looking at having a drum circle. We’re looking at having a people plant connection come in. So they’ll make like a plant. Speaker 2 We’re having them come in for April. So something probably around Easter. And we’re also having a wonderful woman. Speaker 2 She’s actually going to around St. Patrick’s Day. She’s going to be singing kind of like Irish songs and so forth. And, you know, we’re really excited about it. Speaker 2 It’s going to be on 1 o’clock every second Monday of the month starting in January. Speaker 1 Where did you get? You said it’s in Nashville. Speaker 2 It is, yeah. When I used to work up in the Berkshires, which I’ve mentioned before, I worked for a hospice company. And up there, wonderful lady, she actually works for a senior living community up there. Speaker 2 And she did a memory cafe. And our hospice company sponsored it. And so I really just stole it from her. Speaker 2 And actually, I told her, I said, I’m taking this from you. Well, then when I went online, I saw that they’re all over the place. Yeah. Speaker 2 And, you know, we need one in Connecticut. I know there are some in Connecticut already. Oh, I didn’t know that. Speaker 2 Yeah, like libraries and senior centers and different things have them. But there’s none in our area that I know of. And it’s great for the caregiver especially. Speaker 2 It just gives them kind of a break, something fun to do, something so they’re not sitting around thinking about, you know, what they have going on. And actually for the person that has Alzheimer’s and dementia too, it’s great for them. You know, it’s fun. Speaker 2 And they’re around their peers. You know, they can be out and socialize. And the one up in the Berkshires, what I saw is a lot of people made friends and they started setting up kind of memory cafe dates outside of the actual official event. Speaker 2 This is nice. And the support is so needed when someone has Alzheimer’s dementia. Speaker 1 Knocking it out of the park as usual, Siobhan, aren’t you? Lots of help, though. Well, of course. Speaker 1 It’s a team effort. Yes. Speaking of team efforts, why don’t you take the liberty. Speaker 1 I would love to. To introduce the guest that you are presenting here. Speaker 2 As many of you know, or you guys know, I’ve been in the industry for about 20 years. So I’ve been around a ton, a ton of memory cares. And I’ve never seen a memory care like ours. Speaker 2 And I know I’m saying it. I work there. But it’s so true. Speaker 2 And that reason for that, it always comes from the top. And it’s Holly Taylor Fry. She is amazing. Speaker 2 I mean, every time I go in there and her person-centered, customized care, which we’re going to hear about for every individual in our memory care, it is so true. She gets to know people down to, for silly, bare bones. I mean she really, really customizes even the welcome signs. Speaker 2 Like some people just put up, oh, welcome so-and-so. Like there was a gentleman that is an architect, and so she put that up. Like she kind of was like, oh, wait, no, he’s an architect. Speaker 2 We’re going to do this. We’re going to do that. She had this whole plan around his welcoming. Speaker 2 And so she’s quite amazing. And so I’ve been wanting her to have her on the show. I couldn’t rope her into it because she’s very busy. Speaker 2 She’s got some big shoes to fill. And so I figured, oh, we’re going to have her on the phone. And so, ladies and gentlemen, the wonderful Holly Taylor Fry. Speaker 1 Holly, good morning and welcome to the show. Speaker 3 Hi, good morning, Gary. It’s fun. Thank you so much. That’s very kind. Absolutely. Speaker 1 Wow. I mean, that’s… I know. Speaker 3 I know. How do you… I don’t know how to follow that up. Yeah. Well, Gary, I’m just going to do my very best. Speaker 1 Tell us maybe a little bit about yourself and what specifically you do at the hikes. Speaker 3 Sure. So I have a therapeutic recreation background, and that wasn’t enough, so I became a certified therapeutic recreation specialist. And then the opportunity came here in Hartford at the Heights, where they were building a brand-new memory care, and I said, hey, that sounds like a great thing for me. Speaker 3 So I took a lot of years of my skilled practice and was able to bring it here to the Heights and was part of a groundbreaking, you know, awesome building of memory care from the ground up. I was actually part of, you know, choosing the artwork that went into this space. And, you know, all of these components make such a huge difference in making it a warm and comfortable environment. Speaker 3 And I was really blessed by having Bill Englehart as the director of the Heights here pretty much give me carte blanche and allow me to run with my dream and create the space that i have to this day so i’ve been in doing this for almost five years now it’s amazing so was the position Speaker 1 created for you with you or did you did you um did someone leave and then you filled that position Speaker 3 no no i didn’t i created this this is this is what i created so you are you created the blueprint Speaker 1 of this, if you will. Speaker 2 Yes. Award-winning blueprint. Speaker 1 What is this? Holly, something tells me you’re a very humble person. Siobhan, you might want to elaborate on this award-winning. Speaker 2 Yeah. I’ll let Holly elaborate because she’s the… Speaker 3 Our memory care is an award-winning design. I was fortunate enough to be part of helping a assistant kind of creating the space as far as the artwork and what would be appropriate. But, I mean, the space was designed. Speaker 3 I got to just put a little bit of my own twist on things and really, you know, for example, I wanted to put a full moon at the end of the hallway where the exit sign was. And I said, well, that’s not really what I want all of my dementia residents to be drawn to. It’s a beautiful picture, but that’s not going to work. Speaker 3 So I kind of had a little art back and forth with the art director. But I won, so that’s okay. Well, of course. Speaker 3 That being said, I don’t have my residents constantly going to the end of the hall or the exit sign. Speaker 1 And that was the goal. What exactly, and pardon me for such an elementary question, but what exactly is memory care? We’ve heard the term, we talk about it all the time, but your definition, from your angle, from your vantage point, what do you consider memory care? Speaker 3 Well, memory care is really a space that provides intentional care for individuals with memory conditions. We want to raise them to their highest functioning ability. So that is through the environment as well as the trained staff that understands how to engage somebody to promote them to their highest functioning ability. Speaker 3 an example of that is I have intentional staff in my early years here you know they found a resident that was lovely and she was adorable and everybody’s grandmother but they wanted to feed her because you know why not she’s adorable and I had to kind of put the kibosh on that because she’s capable and she just needed the queuing and the right you know situation and once I kind of trained staff on that and gave them the understanding that it’s important to empower somebody to their highest functioning ability, this woman went on to feeding herself for another two years. Without that, she would have stopped feeding herself because her brain just wouldn’t have connected anymore. So those are the kind of interventions I try and observe. Speaker 3 And when there’s a need, I really intervene and put together whatever is in the best interest of that individual. Speaker 1 All right, so based on that, how does someone know that it’s time for memory care? I would imagine the individual, him or herself, may not be aware or may not even care to admit. Is it, I would imagine normally family members, particularly the offspring, the children from? Speaker 3 Yeah, no, it’s a great question. I would say, you know, if you start seeing somebody who’s changed in their behavior, They become a little more disoriented, like putting their physical safety at risk, like wandering away from the home and maybe not being able to get back. That’s definitely a red flag. Speaker 3 Getting lost driving is another certain concern, of course. If you see somebody who maybe loses that weight because they don’t realize that maybe they’ve forgotten how to cook, you know, people don’t always live with their loved ones. So you might see them on the holidays, like usually around this time of year. Speaker 3 This is when we’re hearing things. Oh, a mom, I didn’t realize, you know, she’s not able to cook for herself. Boy, she’s lost so much weight. Speaker 3 We need to really, you know, pay attention to what’s going on here. Maybe they’re taking improper medications, you know, which can also offer some different changes in somebody. I guess really if you hear somebody who’s, you know, garbled in their verbal skills, you know, what’s happening there? Speaker 3 What’s the reason behind that? Pay attention to that. Can they work the phone? Speaker 3 Are they calling as often as they used to? Maybe not. Maybe they don’t realize, you know, they don’t know how to use the phone all of a sudden. Speaker 3 And it can come on slow, but it can also be a sudden concern right away that you don’t even realize. Because people do with cognitive impairment early stages, they develop an ability to cover coping phrases, you know, a general phrase. So you need to dig a little deeper. Speaker 3 Maybe ask a little more detailed questions, see really where their thought process is. You know what I… Speaker 1 Yeah. No, no, no, no. Please continue. No, go ahead. Speaker 3 No, I was just saying, you know, some people just don’t… We’ll take that blanket answer and roll with it and not realize that maybe there’s something a little bit more. So you kind of have to ask for more probing questions to really get underneath that. Speaker 1 You know, Holly, if there’s anything to be taken from this, it’s that it’s not always obvious. It’s not always in your face where people will think, oh, they forgot my name. You know, she forgot her name. Speaker 1 He forgot my name. He forgot, you know, but, you know, it progresses. Right. Speaker 1 Sometimes it can be just something as simple where that whether or not they remember to take their medicine or if they remember to eat their meal or not. It doesn’t always start off at, you know, they forgot your name. Yeah, I think that’s where people go more first towards. Speaker 1 Well, you know, I remembered my name, so we must be doing somewhat okay. Well, yeah, that’s maybe a few steps down the path a little bit. I’m not saying it doesn’t start there, but probably more often than not, it doesn’t. Speaker 3 And the caretakers don’t realize, those loved ones who are in the person’s life regularly, they don’t realize how much they actually shoulder because it’s gradual. Yeah. You know, until you take that caretaker away, and that’s something you also have to consider. Speaker 3 You know, what happens if your caretaker is no longer there because they have a health crisis or something? Right. You know, then what’s going to happen? Speaker 3 Those are those next steps, thought process. Okay, I’m in this situation. What are my next steps if something happens to me? Speaker 3 Because I got this right now, but I run a memory care, and I work with a whole team of people. Speaker 1 All right, so then to that point, what should a caregiver or loved one look for when choosing a memory care? Speaker 3 Well, that’s a really good question as well. Safety, comfort. When you walk in, definitely tour the space. Speaker 3 You know, how does it make it feel? Is it dark? How does it ultimately make you feel? Speaker 3 And that’s going to generally make an impact on the person that you may be looking to have go there. So you want to see, you know, how’s the staffing? Do they look friendly? Speaker 3 Are they making eye contact? Are they paying attention to the residents in the area? You know, do people look generally well-kept? Speaker 3 You know, all of that factors. Now, that doesn’t mean that if you see a resident who happens to be wearing, you know, three sweaters, you know, that could be something that that resident needs. Speaker 1 That’s me on the coldest day of the year, by the way. Speaker 3 That’s what I’m saying. You know, if you walk into any kind of a memory, I’m sorry, but the elderly, they feel the cold more than we do. Speaker 1 Yeah, I think they’re blunt. Somebody told me they’re blood thin as you age, right? Speaker 2 It’s like moving to Florida. Right. Right. That’s why a lot of them do that. Speaker 1 Yes. Speaker 2 Well, yeah. They’re cheaper down there, too. Speaker 3 well my point is you can’t always you gotta you gotta dig a little bit there Speaker 1 folks you are listening to your next chapter it’s a production of the heights at avery heights senior living community along with siobhan Mattingly i’m gary byron our guest this morning is the heights memory care director holly taylor fry holly what are some of the benefits or or or memory, let’s say like memory care versus staying at home. Like, for example, for a person who had memory challenges, let’s start there first. Speaker 3 Yep. So somebody who has memory challenges really will flourish with a consistent routine. Having a trained staff to meet and understand those individuals and how a routine works for this particular person for example in my memory care you know I don’t have a breakfast time you know this is their home so therefore they come to breakfast when they would like to have breakfast so we start to learn what is their routine like what do they need I know who doesn’t like onions I know who doesn’t like olives I can be very specific with their needs and their interests because if you have one of those items on a plate they may not eat their food I certainly don’t want that so having the trained staff I can actually go to my staff right now and they’ll say oh no that one doesn’t like pepper or this one doesn’t like onions and meaningful activities you know having regular activities throughout the day to kind of anchor their day that’s really key the stimulation of cognitive programs you know word games Sudoku type activities working the right and the left side of the brain offering social opportunities to engage them socially I have one woman that came to me. Speaker 3 She really wasn’t, you know, making a lot of sense. But I went with her as far as my tone of voice. I had nonsensical conversations or, you know, I responded to those nonsensical conversations. Speaker 3 And that actually started to bring her out of her confusion a little bit because she was getting the stimulation. She started answering with two and three word sentences as opposed to a nonsensical structure. So all of that was really good stuff. Speaker 3 As far as home, you know, home is home. You know, you may not understand the real core need of a structure. So you just kind of let somebody stay in bed for as long as they want, and maybe that’s not the best thing for them. Speaker 3 Maybe you don’t encourage them to get up and walk as far as maybe they can. Maybe, you know, sitting in front of a TV all day is kind of the only stimulation they may get. So it’s not because it’s bad. Speaker 3 It’s because it’s comfortable. And it’s because, you know, home, they don’t know any different. So, you know, they’re not trained. Speaker 3 And that’s understandable. And everything that comes to a person who’s at home is through love. But they don’t realize that they might be actually making the disease progress faster. Speaker 1 So then for the caregiver or loved one, from that perspective, what would you say? Speaker 3 From a caregiver or loved one as far as having the opportunity to have somebody in a memory care? Speaker 1 In other words, it would take a lot of the burden and the stress away from them, to the point that you were just making a moment ago, where they can help them to a certain extent, help them get dressed, help them make food, pay the bill. Okay, so simple things like that. But as it progressively gets worse, sometimes it just falls out of someone’s area of expertise. right where they would sit there and say i can do the very this i can help you in very simple forms sure no problem because you’re a loved one but some of the more serious uh care well i’m not Speaker 3 qualified for so right exactly i mean you do have you know issues of perhaps incontinence well you know that can be a challenge for a loved one and unfortunately you know they do have caregiver or burnout. And so it’s really important to get that support. And the memory care, they’re trained for that. You know, they know that there’s a need. If somebody, you know, I’m sorry, I’m choosing the incontinence, but that, you know, that can lead to a life-threatening issue. And that may not be detected in a timely fashion, whereas in a supervised memory care situation where you have nursing on staff, or you have trained individuals such as myself, who I can identify when You know, Mrs. Smith is no longer telling me the correct, you know, response to the regular questions that she’s always responded to. Speaker 3 And all of a sudden, she’s saying blue moose or something. I’m like, okay, that was not the way it was yesterday. I need to identify and alert my nursing team to say, hey, can we look at this a little bit closer? Speaker 1 All right. I’m running out of time. I am so sorry. Speaker 1 I didn’t mean to cut you off. I just have – there’s a couple of questions I really wanted to get to, and I wanted to do so before I’m completely out of time. Number one was the Burnham Family Residence Memory Care. Speaker 1 So can you tell me a little bit about that? Speaker 3 Yes. When you walk in, it’s absolutely well-lit, beautiful, blue-green hues with beige furniture. We come into a main community space through a secured door. Speaker 3 To the left is the dining area and kitchen area with the most glorious countertop that actually serves as a stove area. but it’s very safe because it does not get hot. But we serve the same food as the main dining room upstairs. Speaker 3 It’s offered lots of choices every day of the week. And we also have a galley kitchen, so we can certainly provide additional food for different or picky eaters, which is always nice. It opens further into the dining space, which leads right to a French door, which goes to our beautiful garden, which has chairs and tables and a raised garden bed. Speaker 3 gazebo and walking path. When you come back in through, we also have, walking a little further, an office space where myself and the nursing staff reside. And then you have the main hallway, which goes all the way down. And on either side, we have 10 individual rooms with individual bath spaces, which is really nice. We have laundry services as well. And that is the entity. Speaker 3 We do have one more quiet room space that’s nice when visitors come, so that’s lovely. In the main community space, we also have smart TV, and I utilize an IN2L system, which stands for It’s Never Too Late, which is the latest technology. Speaker 1 Is that all part of what you think makes your memory care at Avery Heights so successful? Speaker 3 Well, definitely. The environment plays a large role. I have the ability to flex the lighting as needed. Speaker 3 But understanding the training that I have and bringing that forward and educating others to understand this disease and implementing what needs to be and being flexible, all of that is something that’s trained. That’s what’s needed, you know, understanding to have the compassion, to build the trust, to have the familiarity. That’s really what supports residents with dementia care needs. Speaker 3 because you can’t change their dementia. It’s going to continue to progress. So if you have historical knowledge of them when they can’t tell you about themselves anymore, it’s going to go a long way to their ultimate well-being. Speaker 1 I want to conclude with this final question. Sure. What is one piece of advice that you would tell someone listening to this, maybe in order to help them with their search, could be their transition or maybe a stay at a memory care facility. What piece of advice would you offer? Speaker 3 I would say, you know, do your research and find what fits your needs and ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask. And I want to kind of, I guess, specifically when it comes to your loved ones, have a sense of humor and have a lot of patience. Speaker 1 That’s great advice. Siobhan, it sounds a lot like what you have said in the past when I’ve asked you a similar question. Speaker 2 Yeah, and I love what Holly said about, you know, paying attention to how it makes you feel. A lot of times with this, you know, with senior living, you think of the cost or you think of location. And instead of paying attention to all of that, how does it make you feel? Speaker 2 How do you feel about whether your loved one is going to be cared for in the environment? And start there and then go to the other two because obviously those are important as well. But it’s important, your gut, your first initial gut. Speaker 2 We get a lot of folks from other communities. It is, you know, sometimes it’s not a good fit. And that’s the reason why all of them indefinitely, they say, oh, you know, I didn’t get a good feeling when I first came in. Speaker 2 And you got to go with that feeling, whether it’s our memory care or another memory care. Speaker 1 You got to go with that gut feeling. Speaker 2 You have to, because that initial gut feeling is real. Speaker 1 And first impression. Speaker 2 It’s real. Yeah. Speaker 1 I can imagine. It must be a struggle. Some of that you encounter, both of you, every day. Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. For more information on today’s topic, memory care, with our special guest, Holly Taylor Fry. The Heights Memory Care, I would say check out the website. Speaker 1 Yes, the website, yeah. Averyheights.org. That’s A-V-E-R-Y-H-E-I-G-H-T-S. Averyheights.org. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Until next weekend, thanks so much for listening. Have a good one, everybody. Speaker 1 So long. 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Learn more … **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Alzheimer's, Assisted Living, Caregiving Senior Living, Dementia, Memory Care --- ### [Caregivers “Taking Care of YOU!”](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/caregivers-taking-care-of-you/) **Published:** December 16, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Almost one in three adults in the United States are caregivers, providing care for a loved one. Caregiving can be rewarding but it can also be stressful, bringing about feelings of anxiety, fatigue, sadness, and trouble sleeping. Listen as we talk about the importance of caregivers taking care of themselves and the repercussions when they ignore the warning signs. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday to everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heitz Senior Living. Avery Heitz is a 43 acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now, this show is going to provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life’s journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, what’s going on? How are you? I’m good. It’s nice to see you. It’s good to see you. Getting ready for your Disney trip? Speaker 2 Yes, yes. Speaker 1 Next week. Next week? Next week. Speaker 2 Yeah. Very excited. Speaker 1 How can you not be looking? Speaker 2 Oh, my goodness. I can’t wait to see the kids’ faces. You know, like they have that parade at Magic Kingdom and their eyes will light up. All the characters. I think it’s more me. Let me just be honest. I can’t wait to see. Speaker 1 Oh, you were saying that last week. You’re like a big kid. Speaker 2 I like the villains, though. Speaker 1 Oh, the villains. Speaker 2 Who are they? Jafar and Coelha and Ursula. Speaker 1 I don’t know any of them. Speaker 2 Yeah. And the Wicked Witch from Snow White with the apple. Speaker 1 Oh, I’ll stick it to the Wizard of Oz. Try it. Oh, I like her, too. The Wicked Witch. I’ll get you my pretty. Yes. Is she cool? Yeah. Little dog, Tony. Yeah. Your little dog, too. I love the villains. But the Wicked Witch of Cinderella. Is that Cinderella? Or Snow White? Snow White. Speaker 2 You have the stepmother in Cinderella. Snow White is the Wicked Witch. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 That gives her the apple. Speaker 1 And then the seven dwarfs, right? Well, they weren’t evil. No, no, no. But that’s part of it. Yes, it is. Okay. I don’t know. I get all my. Do they even have, like, do little kids even know who Mickey Mouse is? Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 Mickey’s like… Where do you see Mickey Mouse? Speaker 2 Mickey’s like… I don’t know. My daughter knows, though. Well, there’s a Disney store at the mall. Speaker 1 Okay, but my point is… There’s still a Mickey Mouse Club. Speaker 2 There was on Disney for a while. Britney Spears is from the Mickey Mouse Club. Speaker 1 Yeah, but that was, what, 30 years ago? Speaker 2 Yeah, but they repeat stuff. Everyone knows who Mickey Mouse is. Minnie Mouse. My daughter knows who all they are. Donald, Daisy. She even knows Daisy. Speaker 1 All these cartoons nowadays. They’re not… When do you see Mickey anymore? Speaker 2 You do. You do. Speaker 1 Do you? Disney Channel. Speaker 2 Yeah, Disney Junior has lots of Mickey. Speaker 1 All right. Yes. I think you’re worth it. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Do they still do a Mickey Mouse Club today? Speaker 2 I don’t know if they do one today. I know that they did one, like we said, during that time. But I don’t know. She never really, yeah. I watched Mickey Mouse Club back in the day, but I don’t think she. Speaker 1 Yeah, but they don’t have like the, I mean, Annette Funicello. Remember? Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I don’t think so. I don’t think so. Speaker 1 Have all the boys laid liked her? Speaker 2 Yeah. They did. Speaker 1 Yeah, they did. I mean, she’s long gone now, sadly. It’s the Mickey Mouse Club. I think she had multiple sclerosis, I think, or something like that. Speaker 2 She ended up doing the beach movies, too. Oh, yeah. I think that’s when you’re thinking. With Frankie Avalon. Yes, yes. Speaker 1 Beach Blanket Bingo. Speaker 2 I think he was in the Mickey Mouse Club, wasn’t he, too? Speaker 1 The big Beach Blanket Bingo that they did and a couple of others. I didn’t know he was on the Mickey Mouse Club, though. Speaker 2 Wasn’t he? Weren’t they on there together? Speaker 1 Oh, I don’t know. Speaker 2 Isn’t that where they met? Speaker 1 Somebody will let us know. Somebody will listen to this and they’ll contact you or the station. Speaker 2 This is important. We need to know. Speaker 1 Real serious stuff. All right, sorry, have you started packing yet, or is that still too soon for me? Speaker 2 I’ve got so much to do. I’ve got to remember, I’m like, I take care of the whole family. So they get all set. They’ll be all downstairs with their suitcases, and I’ll be upstairs scrambling around packing. I do a packing list, though. Packing lists are important. Because you always forget something. Speaker 1 Even with a list? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 You forget to put it on the list. Speaker 2 You do forget stuff, but at least you have less of a chance of forgetting stuff. Speaker 1 Are you there for a week? Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. Speaker 1 We’ve been Sunday to Saturday. I think we covered this last week. There’s four parks now. Four parks, yep. But there’s seven. Well, all right. So let’s say six. One’s a travel day. Speaker 2 Well, and the two water parks, too. Two water parks, too. Speaker 1 There’s two within the Disney compound? Yes. Or elsewhere? Speaker 2 Yes. No, no, no. Yeah. Tidal wave typhoon or something. Speaker 1 All right. So you don’t even need a car, really, do you? Speaker 2 Well, we’re getting a car because they say you should take a day off. So that’s where we’re going for so many days. So we’re actually taking Tuesday off from Disney. I don’t know what we’re going to do. But my brother lives in Florida. Oh, well, there you go. He lives in Florida. So he’s or down depending on how far you gotta go up yeah from fort laurie he’s gonna come up okay um and then my stepdaughter’s um boyfriend’s grandmother also lives in florida so this these will be visiting days so it’ll be fun yeah i haven’t seen my brother in years week yeah sunday to saturday Speaker 1 but they say it’s still good to take a day off you know we were talking about weather maybe even off the air a little bit as well um and and you are you like this time of year october november they Speaker 2 say i was going to go in um because the kids are from school and there’s no conflict july and august but they say it’s better to go in october november so i so my point because here we are now today’s october 1st right so the week of um however however you say it the ninth they have off for the discovery of america right that’s probably the easiest way to say it and so uh so she’ll have monday and then she’s got four other days and so we’ve already contacted her teacher so we are pulling her out of school but but yeah but she’ll be fine because yeah you like the hot weather. This won’t be hot though. They say October, November is the better time to go. Speaker 1 Oh, but it’s not going to be hot at all? Well, it’ll be kind of hot. It’ll be nice. Speaker 2 Yeah, it’ll be nice. Well, Florida, I remember one time when I took my son in November, it was cold. Like at night, like winter coat cold. Oh, come on. Yeah, luckily we had winter coats. It was cold. Speaker 1 Maybe January at night. I’m telling you, it was November and we were cold. I get cold Speaker 2 though, so you can’t really go by me. All right. Speaker 1 Say so. Speaker 2 I don’t know. I will tell Mickey you said hi. Speaker 1 Oh, please do. Yes. Tell Mickey and Minnie for that matter. Both of them. They’re husband and wife, right? I don’t know if they are. Or they’re brother and sister. Speaker 2 Oh, no. They’re definitely supposed to be dating because even like Daisy and Donald. Speaker 1 There’s a whole dating thing going on. Daisy Dukes? Speaker 2 No, Daisy. Donald’s Daisy’s girl. Yeah. Speaker 1 Donald Duck as a girlfriend? Daisy. Speaker 2 Daisy. Yeah. Speaker 1 Daisy. Speaker 2 And an uncle. Scrooge McDuck. Speaker 1 Oh, I think I kind of remember that one. Yeah. I don’t remember Daisy. Speaker 2 Yeah. And then he’s got the little cousins too, Huey, Dewey, and Louie. Speaker 1 Oh, right. I remember. Yes, I remember that. And then there’s Pluto. Speaker 2 There’s Pluto. That’s a dog. Speaker 1 That’s Mickey’s dog. Okay. Speaker 2 And Goofy’s his friend. Speaker 1 Goofy’s not a dog though, is he? Speaker 2 Goofy’s a dog. Speaker 1 Oh, Goofy’s a dog too. Yeah. Pluto and Goofy, they’re both dogs. Speaker 2 Yeah, but Pluto can’t talk. Goofy can. Speaker 1 I got you. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s a lot of stuff I got to study up on. Speaker 1 Cinderella. We’re talking Cinderella. Cinderella. Yep. Speaker 2 But again, I like the villains. Speaker 1 Oh, that’s right. I know. Speaker 2 And Hansel and Gretel. Hansel and Gretel. That’s Grim Fairy Tales. See, I’m beating him in trivia again. This is great. Yeah, we did that a couple weeks ago. Speaker 1 We tied. Speaker 2 Exactly. Oh, that’s right. We did tie. Dang it. But now I’m ahead. Speaker 1 Yeah, what do you mean again? Speaker 2 Now I’m ahead. Speaker 1 It’s Grim Fairy Tales. She’s trying to get one on me over here. Speaker 2 I’m ahead now, though. Speaker 1 Now I’m ahead. I challenge you when maybe in another week or two. I want another. Speaker 2 Not on fairy tales, apparently. Speaker 1 No. I’d lose that one. Ay, ay, ay. All right. So what about what’s going on at Avery Heights? Let’s go there. Speaker 2 So we’re really, you know, tons of tours going on, which is great. And one of the things is the caregivers. The caregivers, I hate when they come in and they’re just so stressed out. And so my biggest thing is what we’re going to talk about today, which is great, is kind of taking care of themselves. And I developed a program during COVID called Taking Care of You. And it’s capital Y-O-U. And it was a program that I did actually while I was at the hospice company. And I did this presentation for, like, companies. I did it for our own company when I was with hospice. And I did it for several different people. And it was great. And it’s all about caregivers. And caregivers is, you know, the actual loved ones. But it’s also obviously professionals as well. So, you know, we just did it. We talked about on the last show we did a staff encouragement for our employees. So, you know, our aides, our nurses, you know, all those guys are caregivers, you know, and you have to be careful. You got to take care of yourself because you can burn out. Speaker 1 You know, you can be a caregiver just by default and have no experience. Speaker 2 Yes, I was for my mom and it was so challenging emotionally, physically on all levels. I spent so much time just like my dad, who is now since passed, but he would call me every day and they weren’t married anymore. but he would call me every day because I remember calling him from the hospital. I was very estranged from my mom. And for some reason I was her emergency contact, which I didn’t even know. And I remember getting that call and then I went down to the hospital and they were asking me all these questions. They were asking me about her medications and what she does. And they were making me feel, or made myself feel guilty, but I felt guilty. I felt shame that I didn’t know all this stuff. And they’re looking at me like, how can you not know she’s her mother? Well, I hadn’t seen my mother in like four years. And so I remember calling my dad and I just broke down. I was like – but I was it. So I became her conservator and I ended up taking care of her towards the end of life. And our relationship still was very up and down. So it really made it hard because there was still that – and again, my mother did the best she can, but that emotional abuse was still in there. And she had dementia, so it was worse. Good Lord. So it was very challenging. And so I – and I didn’t take care of myself back then. I was very – sometimes I didn’t eat. I was very tired. And what can happen with caregivers if you’re not taking care of yourself, and I see it all the time, you’ll have the, you know, say the husband or the wife comes in and they’re coming in to look for a place for their loved one. And sure enough, what happens if they’re not taking care of themselves? All of a sudden you get that call and they’re in the hospital. You know, they’ve had a heart attack. Speaker 1 They’re not of any use. Speaker 2 Yes, they’ve developed some type of chronic issue. And then we have to take the loved one on in an emergency. And then it’s just a whole big mess. So you have to take care of yourself. You really do need to do so. Yeah. Speaker 1 what happens to caregivers when like we were just talking about when when they don’t take care of themselves i mean is it that you said that some of them can even go into the hospital yeah you know but ultimately two people are going to be needing care the original person you know and then the Speaker 2 person who was giving the care i would imagine and then it rolls down you know like to the you know to maybe the the son or the daughter or loved one and now they’re going to be stressed out Because now they’ve been thrown into the situation where mom and dad need care. And now they need to place them both. I just had a situation at our community, unfortunately, where the dad, he has cancer, unfortunately. And couldn’t find out he ended up in late stages. So he ended up at the scale. She ended up in memory care. And now it’s just all, you know, they’re scrambling to figure this whole thing out. Which nice is with Avery Heights, we do have the continued care. So we could take care of both of them and have them so they could still, you know, the wife could still visit her husband and those types of things. But it’s a very people don’t realize they feel like I’m taking care of my loved one. I’m taking care of my loved one. But they’ve got to take care of themselves. Speaker 1 Caregivers might be thinking, you know, I’m taking care of someone else. I don’t have to take care of myself. But that’s important. I mean, isn’t that in some ways maybe selfish to think of myself over the person that you’re actually caring for? Speaker 2 It really isn’t. And one of the things, the analogies or illustrations I used to give in my presentation is the airplane. You know, people always talk about this. Oh, yes. Put a mask over yourself before you. So if you had a little kid, you would put that mask on them first because – or yourself first. Oh, yourself first. Sorry, yourself first because if you put it on them first and you’re like trying to breathe, you’re going to pass out and then you’re both in trouble. It’s the same kind of concept. You’ve got to put your mask on first and then their mask. And what does that mean? It just it really means in pulling in help. You know, it really means that you don’t have to. People think taking care of their loved one means hands on. And it really doesn’t. It means coming up with a plan. It doesn’t mean and people feel guilty. Wait a minute. I told mom I would take care of her. Well, you’re not going to be able to take care of her if you’re not around. And I’ve seen that happen. And then the person ends up being conserved by the state. And there’s all this stuff that starts to happen. And now you have someone taking care of that person who doesn’t even know them. So you’ve got to take care of yourself, especially if you’re the spouse. You’ve got to find time for yourself, have, you know, whatever it is. If it’s unfortunately it’s dementia or something like that, you know, adult daycares. You can, you know, pull in your family. You can hire, you know, private duty aides. You know, elder services helps out with that stuff as well. Speaker 1 Are there signs that maybe caregivers and their loved ones should kind of look out for as far as red flags are concerned? Speaker 2 Yeah, so definitely if you’re depressed, if you’re not feeling like you want to get out of bed, if you’re angry, if you’re reactionary, if you’re angry, if you’re tired all the time, if you’re not eating properly, you know, these are all red flags for yourself to go. Something’s not right. If you’re not socializing anymore, you have to socialize. Even if you pick up the phone once a week and call someone. Obviously, this was a big thing during COVID, people isolating. Right. Yeah, yeah. So it’s really, really important. Speaker 1 People got deep depressions. Speaker 2 Yep. You’re right. Speaker 1 We’re human beings. We’re social creatures by nature. Speaker 2 Yes. Yes. So those are kind of some of the signs that some of the simple signs that you might think, oh, of course, I’m depressed. Like I ended up getting depressed and it’s like, of course, I’m depressed. My mother, I’m taking care of her. Of course, I’m tired. I’m taking care of her. But over time, that’s going to weigh on you. And another good, you know, illustration is that frog in the frying pan. You probably heard this one before, too. So if you stick a frog in a frying pan and it’s cold and you or a boiling water and you turn on the heat and then it boils, they won’t jump out. Now, if the water’s hot, they’ll jump out. But if it’s just boiling over time, they won’t jump out. They’ll just obviously die. And so that’s the same thing with being a caregiver. It’s over time. Oh, I’m tired. Oh, I’m getting depressed. Oh, I don’t feel like getting out of bed. And over time, you just kind of realize that. And then all of a sudden, you’ve got this boiling pot of water. Now you’ve got caregiver burnout. Now you’ve got fatigue. Now you’re in trouble. Now you’ve got to get help. Or you end up in the hospital or something like that. Speaker 1 So then how can a caregiver take care of him or herself? Speaker 2 Yeah, there’s a lot of things that you can do. So I always go with part of the program I developed was the three A’s. So awareness, acceptance, and action. Those are kind of like your three A’s. So awareness, like we were just talking about. The signs, see the signs. I’m tired. I’m depressed. I’m lashing out at people. I’m angry. I’m not getting enough sleep. I don’t know what I’m doing. You know, if the care, if the loved one, you know, say you, I don’t know, you fall asleep and then they end up wandering, clearly you can’t handle it anymore. So it’s just awareness of your entire situation. And the best way to do that is to step back and almost like you’re watching a movie, you know, watch the movie of this. And if it’s chaos, you know, if it’s if it’s like a Godzilla movie, it’s chaos, then you need to do something about it. So it’s awareness. We have to stay aware. We have to stay in a state of awareness. We can’t just keep going through life, you know, day after day after day, you know, and not paying attention to what’s going on around us. So we really have to be aware. And then with acceptance, we have to accept, okay, here I am. I’ve got this situation. And now what am I going to do? You know, accept what you can do. You know, there’s the serenity prayer that people always talk about. What can I do and what’s out of my control? So do what you can do. What’s out of your control, get some help because that’s out of your control. You know, and then accept the things that are, you know, hey, I did fall asleep. My loved one did wander. But they’re back home. They’re safe. You know, don’t spend so much time shaming yourself. Speaker 1 Do you find caregivers wanting to do more than maybe that’s needed or less? And I ask this only because I knew of a caregiver who was just, they were always, you know, it’s like maybe too attentive to someone’s needs. Like, okay, let them take their time and be themselves and go at their pace. Speaker 2 A lot of times, especially at the Avery Heights Senior Living Committee, a lot of people don’t want to let go. They don’t want to let go. They don’t want to let the nurse do what they got to do. They don’t want the aides to, oh, she doesn’t like the sheets to be that way. And the person is perfectly fine. Oh, she doesn’t like tuna fish salad and she’s eating it. You got to let go. And a lot of times when you’re not letting go, you’re making it about you. That’s about you. You want to be, oh, I’m the caregiver. I’m the superhero. That’s not even about the loved one. And that’s where that awareness comes in. You’ve got to step back and realize, do I really need to? Do I really need to be doing that? Can I just not go visit them every day, you know, at the senior living community? Can I let them have a life? You know, a lot of times people come in. Where’s my mom? Well, she’s, you know, out on the field trip. Oh, you know, yeah. Let her have a life. That’s what the whole thing is about. I mean, you weren’t on top of the, you know, it’s like helicopter, you know, adult children at that point for their loved one. Right. It’s like helicopter parents. It’s like, you got to back up. You got to back up. You got to let go. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community, along with Yvonne Mattingly. I am Gary Byron. All right, let’s go. You want to go a little deeper into each of the three A’s? Yeah. I know. So you have awareness, acceptance, and action. Speaker 2 So action is the one that we really – yeah. So action is – there’s like self-care checklists that you can do. And that’s how you can figure out what is wrong. You kind of do that. You could do that once a month, once a week. You can even do it once a day. One of the ways you could do is like with a check-in as well. So like with the, you know, the traffic light. So if I’m checking in and I’m like, I’m having, you know, I’m feeling all this stuff. If I’m tired, if I’m, you know, all this stuff, then I’m definitely on red. I got to do something, right? I got to stop or and do something. If I’m on yellow, you know, if I’m a little tired, maybe I skip lunch a couple of times. Maybe I skip dinner. So that’s kind of like a warning sign, right? Because you don’t want to get to red. And then if I’m on green, I’m good. I’m exercising. I’m taking care of myself. I’m socializing. I feel good, you know, like today. You know, today I kind of have like a migraine. But that’s something that I’ve got going on. So it’s like I started looking up because I haven’t had a migraine in a long time. So I said, well, what’s going on? Well, come to find out, I just put bagels back in my diet. And I wasn’t eating bagels for a long time. And I looked it up. And I didn’t really. Bagels trigger migraines. One of the top, one of the, there’s different things. There’s nuts. There’s hot dogs. There’s all different chocolate. You know, obviously alcohol and stuff in excess. But like the top, one of the top ones was bakery items. And it said bagels. And I was like, bagels? And for some reason, these last few weeks, I’ve been like bagel crazy, like egg sandwich with bagels. I went to the store and got bagels. I’m like, you know, and I hadn’t done it in a while, but I haven’t had a migraine in a while. So I’m going to test that out. So now I’m like on yellow. What’s going on? Why are my migraines coming back? Speaker 1 So now I’m doing something about it. I think, well, I think you found out. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Go figure. Isn’t that crazy? Yeah. Speaker 1 I never knew that there was a correlation between migraines and bagels. Speaker 2 Yeah. And I don’t like taking the medication because obviously it’s not good for you constantly. Like I was popping them like Tic Tacs because I had a headache. Speaker 1 Like Excedrin or like the Immatrix? Speaker 2 No, I do Excedrin migraine. I haven’t done those yet because I don’t like a lot of medications. But even the Excedrin migraine with the caffeine. I mean you hear me right now. I’m like 40 miles an hour. You’re on fire. Although I’m always very hyper. But today it’s like my husband, he always knows when I have a migraine or had a migraine headache. He was like migraine, right? Because I’m just like at dinner like 40 miles an hour. But obviously that’s not good for me. Speaker 1 I was going to tell you, you know, they do make a decaf now. Speaker 2 Oh, I can’t even do coffee. Oh, my gosh. Can you imagine? Speaker 1 Right now? No, I can’t imagine. If I was a coffee drinker. Speaker 2 Oh, my God. Speaker 1 Oh, you don’t just drink coffee at all? Speaker 2 I don’t. Oh, gosh. I don’t do a lot of anything usually with caffeine, but caffeine really helps when you have a migraine. Yeah. Speaker 1 That’s what they say. Yeah. Speaker 2 I’ve heard that before. Yeah. Speaker 1 Where do caregivers go, let’s say, to get support? Speaker 2 Yeah. So there’s a lot of places. Obviously, to start, if you don’t have the friend support, if you don’t have the family support, which is tough, which unfortunately I didn’t have. My family didn’t kind of rally around. There was a lot going on there. And so the senior center is a good place to start. The Alzheimer’s Association, Elder Services is a good place. Obviously us, a senior living community, elder law attorney, the doctor, their doctor, their PCP. Speaker 1 See, I’m thinking if you’re a course or a self-help book. There’s tons of stuff. Speaker 2 Caregiver’s book. There’s actually caregiver life coaches as well that you can, yeah. The one thing you want to do, though, for me, and I love Google and I love searching, but you can go down a huge rabbit hole. So I definitely pick up the phone, like we were talking about old school, pick up the phone, make that phone call to some of the places I just named. Keep it simple because you can go online and then you can end up paying $3,000 for some caregiver support group. That’s crazy. But people, you know, if you’re desperate and you want help, they can say, oh, we can help you do everything. And it ends up being a big scam. And so you want to, you know, if you can stick local, someone that you can sit down with, that you can face-to-face, look them in the eye, that’s probably the best place to start and not go down kind of the Google rabbit hole. Speaker 1 Well, then what kind of support should caregivers have in place? Speaker 2 Yeah, again, definitely professional support. You should definitely, you know, make sure you make your loved ones PCP like your, you know, one of your advocates. If they have an elder law attorney, if you have the friend support, you know. I always say, you know, I never really had like good, good friends. Probably in the last like 10 years, I’ve got some really good friends. And mind you sidebar, if you want to have good friends, you’ve got to be a good friend. That’s what I learned. That’s what I learned. That’s very true. Really simple. But all of a sudden, why don’t I have good friends? Maybe the problem starts here. You know, point those fingers back at yourself. So that’s one thing. And then your loved ones. You know, it’s hard. You know, I had to have some tough conversations with my siblings. You know, my sister, you know, you know, speaking of which, I did go to end up going to a seminar, a really good one. And then I had a conversation with my sister and I told her, I said, listen, I need your help. You know, I was like crying off the wall, but I was like I and she jumped in. She, you know, she would check in and she, you know, she didn’t do like a ton, but she went, you know, my mother, you know, she used to wear like wigs. And so she went and bought the wig, brought it to her, you know, clothes. She needed clothes. So but that helps. Even if that little bit of something, you know, my sister, every week or every other week she would check in. Do you need me to do anything? And she did. And so sometimes you got to kind of – you got to yell a little bit. You got to set those boundaries. You got to say, hey, you’re – yes, our childhood was what it was. But guess what? Mom needs help and I need you to be involved. Speaker 1 Sometimes you just – you can’t carry that baggage with you, especially at end of – let that go. Speaker 2 Don’t walk around with a big chip on your shoulder. Be open to ask your loved one. Give them a chance. Give them a chance to help out. Because if you’re not saying it, if you’re walking around and you have not said, which I didn’t, I didn’t say boo to my sister about helping me out. And I wanted her. She should know better. Well, you know what? She didn’t. Speaker 1 You know what I respect greatly about you, Siobhan, is that you walk the walk. You know, you don’t do it. It’s not just a job. You’ve been there. Yeah. You’ve had issues in your in your personal life. You have experience with hospice. Wow. What a package that you bring to the table to Avery Heights. And they’re very fortunate to have you there on multiple levels. Look, I could talk to somebody who, this is what I went to college for, this is where on my resume, this is where I worked and this is where I worked. And I don’t want to write that off and say that that’s insignificant. It’s not. It is significant. But when you’ve been there and done that, You know, wow, man, there’s a lot to be said for that. Speaker 2 And people, I feel like, I know for me, I can hear those people better when they’ve been there. You know what I mean? It’s like you can hear what they’re saying. Because a lot of times if I have a caregiver sits down and they’re taking the tour and I start telling them, you know, I kind of say, listen, you got to take care of yourself. They might not hear me. You know, oh, what does she know? You know, have you done this? Have you been through this? Well, I haven’t been through what you’ve been through, but this is what I’ve been through. And then all of a sudden they’re like, oh, well, you do understand. You know, my mother and I, we didn’t have a great relationship. You know, and they think they’re – that’s another thing, too. We’re not the only one. You know, we’re not – we’re unique in our makeup of our experiences and who we are. But don’t ever think – that’s the worst thing you can do for yourself is think that you’re the only one because you’re not. Speaker 1 Good to know. Speaker 2 Always reach out for help. There’s somebody else out there that can relate to your story and can help you out. Speaker 1 Sure, people appreciate hearing that. When is it time to start looking at a senior living community? let’s say, versus home care. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. I mean, again, when you’re, again, step back and take a look at that picture. If your loved one has been wandering, maybe if it’s once or twice and then you put a plan in place, but if you’re looking for them all the time, you know, that’s a problem. If you’re agitated, you know, especially caring with someone, taking care of your parent period is very challenging because remember, you were the kid and there’s always those moments where they’re like, you’re not too old for me to put over your knee or something like that. So there’s always that sense of, wait a minute, that’s my dad. How am I going to ask my dad to eat his peas? Well, guess what? But if you’re yelling at them, if you’re being abusive, and again, when you’re burnt out and it’s too much, that’s when it’s time to – it’s too much for you, especially if they got Alzheimer’s or dementia and you’re trying to take care of them and you’re yelling at them. It’s like yelling at a child. It’s like yelling at a baby. If you’re yelling at someone, well, how come you’re – how come I told you that already? Remember I told you that? Well, and I’ve heard people do that. I’ve heard, I’ve had tours where people are telling the person, remember I told you that? And it’s like, no, they don’t remember you told them that. Speaker 1 That’s, that’s gotta be so tough. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 You know, um, it’s almost like it’s, you’re, you’re treating your parent the way your parent treated you when you were younger. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 You know, that’s, it’s, it’s interesting. Speaker 2 And holding those resentments too, you know, it took a long time for me to move past my resentments with my mom. it took a long time for me not to uh take stuff out she doesn’t deserve it nobody you know and it’s easy like i’m sitting here right now and nothing’s going on um but at the same time that’s where you that’s where that awareness comes in that’s where you step back and that’s where you realize that no one deserves just because they did it to you i have so many conversations with people and especially my daughter who’s 13 and she’s way more involved than i am but it’s like it’s so you know i say to her you know she’s like oh you know she had a friend she wasn’t talking to this friend you know we were at a function and i noticed she wasn’t saying hi and i’m like what’s going on there? Why isn’t she saying hi? And I said to myself, I said to her later, and I didn’t do it in front of the people. I’m not going to be like, say hi to someone. You know, I pulled her aside. I said, listen, you know, how come you didn’t say hi? And basically it was because, oh, mommy, remember she hurt me, blah, blah, blah. It’s like, yeah, but she doesn’t deserve that. No one, there’s no eye for an eye. It’s, it’s really not, it’s not worth it. You’re Speaker 1 only hurting yourself. But you have maturity on your side and kids are going to be more vindictive. Speaker 2 Yeah, but you have to teach them early. Speaker 1 Well, yeah, but you can lead a horse to water, too. Yes. Speaker 2 But you plant the little seeds. Speaker 1 Well, that’s true. Yeah. And hopefully over time. Speaker 2 When she’s older, she’ll go, oh, that’s what my mom meant. Speaker 1 Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. For more information on today’s topic, caregivers taking care of you, please call 866-537-1444. Again, it’s 866-537-1444. Now, the first three callers will get a special lunch and a tour at Avery Heights. I’m still looking forward to having lunch over at Avery Heights for Siobhan Mattingly. I’m holding it to it. I’m Gary Byron. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. So long. Legenda Adriana Zanotto # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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This episode you will learn when to take the keys, how to take the keys, and how to help your loved one keep the keys and drive safely ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody, and welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. And it’s never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way we think about aging, about senior living and retirement years. It is time to celebrate our seniors and give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, inner peace. and the courage to never give up on growing. And we’re going to discuss some exciting opportunities, important resources for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health. It’s all hosted by, of course, the Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly and myself, Gary Byron. Good morning, Siobhan. Speaker 2 Good morning. It’s very nice to see you. How was your week? It was good. It was good. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Father’s Day action. Speaker 1 Yeah. And, of course, more time with your new granddaughter. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 You’re still beaming, as you were last week. Speaker 2 I can’t help it. I fell in love with her instantly. Speaker 1 Of course you did. Speaker 2 I know. Speaker 1 Like you did with your grandson a year and a half ago when he was born. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 We’re talking off air, but you made some really great points about it’s a different vibe, a different feeling when you’re the grandmother and not the parent, right? Speaker 2 You’re like the fun. You know, you’re the fun. Yeah. You can just have fun and then just be like, okay, he’s crying, she’s crying, go change Speaker 1 him. Time to hand her back over. Speaker 2 Nap time. Yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. But we try to babysit too. I mean, I try to, you know, help out as well, but. Speaker 1 It’s harder from, you know, an hour away, an hour and a half away. Speaker 2 I can spoil. I don’t have to yell, you know. Speaker 1 Wait till they get older. Speaker 2 You take care. Speaker 1 Wait till they get older. Do you want to talk about spoiling? Speaker 2 I know. They’re wicked spoiled, though. They have everything. Speaker 1 How do you think you’ll be different as a grandmother as opposed to a mom? Speaker 2 Well, it’s different for me because I had my daughter at 42. And so it’s kind of like I’m different with her as a parent. Do you know what I mean? So I think I’m going to be kind of the same way. I’m just more aware, more insightful, more connected. Do you know what I mean? I was a young parent with my son. And so I was just more into like, what do I want to do? And me and me and me. Where now I’m an adult. And I pay attention more to. You know, and I see the bigger picture. You know, if they’re upset, I’m not just looking at, oh, you’re upset. I look at, you know, I go back, I check in. You know, just more aware of the consequences of my actions. Speaker 1 I’m so happy for you. Speaker 2 Yeah. How, what’s new over at the Heights? Well, we have the summer concert series. Yes, you do. Evening Under the Stars. So we have, and the community’s welcome. The general public is welcome. So it’s June 27th from 630 to 8. We’ve got Jukebox 45. People can dance. And then July 26th from 630 to 8, we have the electrics. So, yeah, it’s a really great event at Avery Heights. Tons of people show up from the area, from the community, but also it’s really neat to see, like, the cottagers. They just come outside and just have their chairs sitting there and their little picnics, and it’s kind of cool. Speaker 1 And it’s live music. Speaker 2 It’s live music, and it’s, yeah, it’s nice. And we’ve got a couple different rain dates, too. Speaker 1 Like a band. A band that’s playing live. Yes, yeah. Speaker 2 It’s really nice. It’s nice. Speaker 1 Dancing and singing along to the songs I’m sure everybody’s already familiar with. Speaker 2 So people have their dinner and then they kind of go on down and enjoy. Speaker 1 You know, this is such a happening spot, the Heights at Avery Heights. Yes. Folks, if you haven’t requested a tour yet, I don’t know what you’re waiting for. Speaker 2 Or come to the concert. Speaker 1 Come to the concert. You guys give tours with meals included. Yes, exactly. You know what? One of the things you were emphasized a while back that resonated. is you’re not, here’s a contract, or here’s a sign. You’re just, hey, take your time. Visit other places. You’re so confident that you ask, that you tell them, go check out our competitors. And then you’ll end up coming back here. Speaker 2 It’s a big decision. We actually just had a tour the other day, and they had toured maybe like eight or nine places, did some tours after us, tours before us, and they were like, I overheard them talking to the mom, And they were like, by far, Mom, this was our favorite. And that’s always just, I mean, by far. Yeah, I can understand why. If you’ve been to eight places, and then, you know, that was really nice to hear. Speaker 1 Eight places, maybe that’s a little too many. I’d say go to, you know, three or four. Yeah. Speaker 2 There’s a lot out there now. It’s like, it’s overkill. Speaker 1 And you’re non-profit, you know? Yes. Oh, man, what a place. Your grounds. I mean, I’ve been there. Speaker 2 The other day I was doing a tour, and there was a deer right outside the window. Little baby deer eating, like, little leaves. It was almost like a theatrical production. Cue the deer, you know? Yeah. Speaker 1 the deer. Speaker 2 It’s like I planned it, you know, and he’s eating, nibbling off the tree. And I’m like, okay, we’re done with the deer. Speaker 1 In Hartford, nonetheless. Yes. Right? Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah, it was beautiful. Speaker 1 So I find it interesting. The second your guest came in, I’m like, I remember him. The only thing is I got my timing was wrong. I thought it was back in the fall that he was here. It turned out back in February under a different capacity. Why don’t you take the honor to introduce him and our topic for this morning? Speaker 2 It is my great honor to introduce Dr. Kevin Manning. He was here back earlier this year talking about elder financial health, and he actually did a presentation at our community as well, which is very well received. And today he’s talking about a super important topic, driving safely for older adults. This is like the biggest question, biggest dilemma when people come in for tours. It’s like, how do I take the keys? Or, you know, do I take the keys? So there’s a lot of questions around that, and he is here to hopefully enlighten and answer those questions. Hey, guys. Speaker 1 Great to see you again. Great to have you. Thanks for having me. Great to have you back. For our listeners, though, that may not have, maybe have heard the show back in February that you were on, just tell us briefly a little bit about yourself, what you do over at UConn Health Center. Speaker 3 Sure. So I’m a clinical neuropsychologist at UConn Health. I am asked to often evaluate patients about problems with thinking and memory and make a diagnosis. With that sometimes comes decisions related to independence and automobile driving and determining whether somebody is fit to drive. And as an aside, I have a longstanding interest in automobile driving. My dissertation was on driving capacity in older adults. So it’s a very important topic that’s near and dear to my heart. Speaker 1 Hey, I know people middle-aged that shouldn’t even be driving, let alone some aging seniors. All right. There’s a lot of research that have been done on this topic. And, I mean, you know better than anybody. What were you most surprised to learn with the data that was obtained through this research? Speaker 3 Yeah, you know, so I think clearly we know that with increasing age comes age-associated factors that increase your risk of having a traffic accident or making driving errors, like cognitive changes or visual changes. That’s clear. What I like to think about, though, is how can we maintain or enhance somebody’s driving capabilities to keep them on the road longer so that they maintain that autonomy, that independence? That’s where I like to see the research going, and that’s some of the stuff that we do at UConn Health. Speaker 1 Is there any data that support there are more accidents with older adults, or is there maybe another demographic that the numbers are higher? Don’t say women. Speaker 3 Don’t say women. And if you do, do it behind you. Speaker 1 Move my chair over. Move your chair over closer to my mic. Speaker 3 You know, so when investigators look at the total number of miles driven, so older adults do drive less. But when you control for that, older adults are at an increased risk of having traffic accidents. Yes. And there’s factors that contribute to that. So with changes in age, there’s changes in cognition and particularly around processing speed of visual information. So in the clinic, something that we do is we administer tests of visual processing speed, and we can actually tell a patient, you know, because of your performance on this test in the clinic, we think that you’re falling into this category where you’re at increased risk of having an accident or making driving errors. Now, I’ll say this is not what I do. I sort of comment on this, but then I refer people to a specialist. So when I think about a specialist, I think about somebody who is really a driving rehabilitation specialist, traditionally an occupational therapist by training. And this is an evaluator who’s going to do some tests in the office similar to what I just described, these visual processing speed tests, but then also take people out on the road and evaluate their driving. similar to what happened when we took a road test to get your license. Where I see this as really important is that this specialist, yes, is making a medical decision about yes or no, is this person safe to drive, but they can also relay strategies or ways to compensate and say, okay, I have Mrs. Smith. Mrs. Smith is making some errors, but I think if we work on these errors, we’re going to correct them and keep her on the road for a longer period of time. That’s where I see the real benefit of going to an evaluation like that. Speaker 1 You know, I would imagine, because I’ve heard this myself from my own grandmother, who’s long passed away and was driving up until 95. I’ll talk about the independence in a moment. Yeah. They think it’s their right. It’s my right to drive. It’s a privilege. It’s not a right. It’s a privilege. Exactly. It’s not a right. There’s no right for you. Yeah. You know, because you can pose a danger to yourself and others by being on the road. Absolutely. Let’s talk about that because the experience that I went through and that my father went through, his mother, my grandmother at the time, was she felt that she was giving up part of her independence. She wants to go to the market. She goes to the market. She wanted to go to church. And you said it. It’s all right within town. She wasn’t even hopping on the highway. She wasn’t going to – my father lives in Avon. My grandmother lived in Wethersfield. She wasn’t driving over. My father would come over to her. She wouldn’t drive. But it was just the stuff in town. Yes. The only things that she would go to. The post office, the bank, the market. You know? Speaker 3 So, you know, there’s a statistic that I cite because – exactly. I hear from patients, well, I only drive locally or I restrict my driving. Speaker 2 I’m only driving during the day during the day in my neighborhood. Speaker 3 And the statistic is that most traffic accidents happen within five miles of your house. So it’s not that people are driving distances on that trip to Florida that something happens. It’s that local area concern. Speaker 1 So, Doc, how do you tell somebody who has been independent for most of their life? Yes. Speaker 3 such a hard question. Well, I mean, but it’s the golden question. It is. So I like to think about it in terms of we want to do everything we can to make sure you, the patient, are driving as long as possible and are as independent as possible. So I talked to them about that point, but also the point that we want to make sure you’re safe and other people on the road are safe. I do talk about driving in terms of privilege. It’s not a right. And in the end, it’s really the DMV that’s responsible for regulating their privilege. Physicians and other clinical providers can provide input, but it’s the DMV’s decision. So it’s not my decision as a provider. I give recommendations. And my first recommendation is what I was describing is really when it comes time to decide whether somebody is fit to drive or not, I refer them for this on-road driving evaluation. And I talk to them acknowledging that this is a loss. This is a loss of independence. This is a loss of autonomy. And how can we compensate for that? So how can we work with either a taxi company to schedule regular visits? It could be pricey. It could be pricey. There are actually community volunteers, though, through different communities, have different setups. For example, West Hartford has senior drivers who volunteer their time to pick up older adults and drive them to appointments in the grocery store and things like that. So you can find people who will volunteer their time without substantial costs to drive you places. But, yeah, I acknowledge with my patients how difficult this decision is. It’s not an easy decision to come to. Speaker 1 I mean, of course we want people to maintain autonomy as long, as long as possible. but we also want to ensure safety of the individual, right, and our largest society as a whole. So what are the age-associated factors that increase risk of accidents? Speaker 3 Yeah, so cognitive changes. From a cognitive standpoint, that means a decline in certain processing speed abilities. Okay. That means visual changes. Somebody’s useful field of view, sort of their peripheral vision, how fast can they detect sort of stimuli in their periphery. There are computerized tests to assess that. There are physical changes. So when we think about older adults, there’s this increase in frailty. There’s an increase in their ability to – a decrease in their ability to turn their neck sideways, right? So you think about those types of physical changes that lead to a decrease in flexibility can have implications for just checking behind you when you’re backing out of the driveway or checking your side view mirror. Those types of changes are what we talk about when we think about an increase in age-related associations with driving errors or poor driving. And again, to your point, we know that depression increases when we take people’s driving licenses away or they relinquish their driving license. Speaker 1 Because it’s associated to their independence. Speaker 3 Yes. It’s associated from a conceptual level. It’s associated with their independence, right? It’s this abstract concept that now I am dependent on somebody else and I’m not as autonomous as I once was. But also from a practical standpoint, they don’t have as much access to socialization. They can’t get out, potentially, to that senior center, or they can’t get out in their community. So that’s why I think about places like Avery Heights and other independent living centers that are so important for seniors because the community is right there and they don’t need to drive somewhere. Speaker 1 All right. So from – and you look at it from a clinical perspective. Now, someone listening to this, what are some signs that they should be more, they should start to notice? What are the telltale signs? Speaker 3 Great question. So near misses, scratches on the vehicle. Are mom and dad coming home with scratches on the vehicle? Are there near misses when they’re driving where they’re almost about to have an accident but don’t? Is there pedal confusion? Have you observed or has somebody else observed sort of them seemingly confused about which one’s the gas and which one’s the brake? those are signs in addition to that things we’ve talked about in the past is you know this this concept of cognitive aging and cognitive changes so is mom or dad experiencing the onset of a dementia or the onset of mild cognitive impairment do they have a clinical diagnosis related to memory concerns or thinking concerns those are the types of things i would ask people about to start to think about, well, we might need to pursue this further and evaluate driving in order to keep that person safe. Speaker 2 And it’s scary, too. I remember a story where the guy was driving around in the summer with the dog in the car and he had the windows up and the dog ended up dying. Yeah. Yeah. Because it was hot, really hot. Yeah. And so there’s a lot of horror stories when it comes to driving beyond just the accident piece of the portion. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, one of a kind senior living community, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Our guest this morning is Dr. Kevin Manning from UConn Health Center. You know, it’s funny, or maybe it’s ironic is a better word. You associate accidents with reckless driving, and you see people get pulled over for speeding. I mean, my goodness, speeding in Connecticut on our highways and byways is just incredible. But I think something that’s just as dangerous is a person, and it’s usually, though, not always, but usually elder, and they’re driving way below the speed limit. And not just on a back street, but on a highway. And I’m like, buddy, you’re going to get yourself killed. Get out of that lane and get over to the far right lane. Because, I mean, look behind you and people are just cutting, because they’re upset. They’re zooming by. You’re not supposed to pass on the right. You’re causing people to pass you on the right and then cut you off because I’ll tell show them. They don’t realize, they probably don’t even realize until after the fact that the person’s elderly. But that’s a fact as well, is driving so slow that you’re a hazard. Speaker 3 Exactly. And so that’s a known hazard. There’s also a known hazard of older adults are more likely to be involved in traffic accidents when turning left in unprotected turns. Sure. And similar to what you’re describing is this decline in processing speed, really, and visual attention where it’s harder to judge or estimate the speed of an oncoming vehicle or perhaps even a vehicle behind you, as you’re describing. Speaker 2 Or driving on the wrong side of the road. Oh, man. We run into that a lot. Speaker 3 Aren’t we? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 3 You know, something to think about is, you know, just to go back to our point earlier about a cognitive diagnosis. More and more, you know, as our population ages, we’re encountering older patients who have a diagnosis of something called mild cognitive impairment or early dementia, Alzheimer’s disease. And we see patients who continue to drive with those diagnoses. And I’m not making the point that having that diagnosis excludes you from driving. What I’d like to say, though, is if you do receive a diagnosis like that, you and your family should start to have a conversation that at some point in time, you’re going to need to relinquish this driving license. And it makes sense, in my mind, to start to have that conversation earlier rather than later. Speaker 1 Kev, I’m glad that you bring this up because I’m running out of time, and that’s exactly where I wanted to go next. This has got to be a difficult question or even proposition to initiate. But if someone is concerned about their own driving or maybe a parent’s driving or grandparent’s driving, like I experienced with mine, what’s the first step? What do they do? What’s the first step that you recommend them to do? Speaker 3 So first step is talk to their physician or other clinical provider and express those concerns. And if it were me, I would also say I’m interested in either for myself or my loved one in having a clinical driving evaluation. And this is a driving evaluation with the occupational therapist, the driving rehabilitation specialist. Start to put that on the provider’s radar about something of concern. With that comes a conversation as a family. And for children to talk with their parents about what they’ve observed and how they’re concerned and get parents’ feedback. Speaker 1 You know, what you say makes sense, but you know what I’m going to bring up next, right? I sure do. The resistance that you’re going to be met with. For human beings, right? Yeah. I mean, that’s not an easy deal. Speaker 3 And certainly there’s going to be pushback in some cases. Yes. And, you know, with some illnesses, there’s a lack of insight. So people might not recognize that weakness. But I do think it makes sense to talk about it as a family and acknowledge. I think you would be surprised if you were able to have that conversation with your grandmother, right? And say to her, I know this is a source of independence for you. I know how much you value this. But can we speak honestly about the fact that I want to keep you safe and somebody else safe on the road? Speaker 2 Gary’s running out the door. No. He’s going to eat his pie and then be like, Grandma, you look great. No, no, no. Speaker 1 Don’t misinterpret me. First of all, you’re the expert, and I’m not even disagreeing with you. I’m not saying that you’re wrong. Actually, I mean, who am I to say that you’re wrong? You’re right. I don’t disagree with you. All I’m saying is easier said than done, mister. Speaker 3 And that’s why, to your point, that’s why this clinical driving evaluation is so very important. Speaker 2 Somebody else, the professionals, yep. Speaker 3 Because that provider is going to give you a yes or no decision about whether you or that loved one is fit to drive. Yep. That doesn’t happen everywhere also. I just want to make that point for folks listening that you can’t just go to any driving instructor and get that evaluation. That driving instructor would take you out of the road, and they might comment on your driving, but they’re not going to give you that hard and fast yes, no, are you safe to drive? And that’s this driving evaluation. Speaker 1 You’re right, and we all know you’re right. Yeah. But they – I don’t want to come full circle here, but it comes back to it’s my right. I’ve been driving before you were even a glimmer in my eye. Yeah, sure. And it’s like, no, it’s not your right. I’m a taxpaying – nothing to do with that. Yeah. You know, it’s a privilege, not a right, you know, but they don’t understand that. Yeah. Speaker 3 So for patients who are really resistant to sort of relinquishing their driving, you know, and they might not want such an evaluation, the physician can write a letter to the DMV requesting that that person relinquish their driving privileges. The DMV will then send a letter to the patient. If the patient is still driving, still holding on to that, I’ve had families come up with different scenarios. And this depends on what works for you and your family. I’ve had families say to a loved one that the car doesn’t work anymore. I’ve had families disconnect the battery. I’ve had families hide the keys. So there are other options to consider. I’m not advocating misleading our patients, obviously. Repossession. Speaker 1 You didn’t pay the bill Speaker 3 The car’s gone Speaker 1 Somebody stole it Speaker 3 That might work for somebody too But what I do want to say is You have to make a decision as a family Pros and cons Balance that independence But also the safety of your loved one Which we all know you’re right And the safety of other people on the road Do something Speaker 1 Don’t wait Thank God my grandmother did not get into an accident What happened was she was less than a mile from her house and she was lost. Yeah. You know, and there was no accident. Right. But, I mean, she pulled over and she talked to a cop. Coincidentally, so we had a cousin on that side of the family who was a cop in the same town. It wasn’t him. But she goes, oh, you know, I’ve got a cousin who’s, oh, quickly got him over and was like, I’ll take care of this. That doesn’t, granted, that doesn’t occur for everybody. That’s just luck. Listen, I’ve got one minute remaining. Any other helpful hints or tips that you can help us with, our listeners, with this topic? Speaker 3 Yeah. Just if you’re concerned about somebody’s driving, start to observe the driving. I mean, how many people actually don’t drive with their parents anymore, aging parents? Get in the car with them. See what their driving’s like. Speaker 1 Firsthand. Speaker 3 Have them drive you to the grocery store. Follow them in your car and see what their behavior’s like. How fast are they going? Are they that person who’s driving or how slow are they going? You know, take some behavioral observations yourself. Yeah. Speaker 1 That’s great advice. I am. Oh, I’m so glad that we had you in this morning. What exceptional advice that you provided. I want to thank our guest who twice now knocked it out of the park from UConn Health Care Center. Dr. Kevin Manning. Really appreciate that. We’ve got to come back on again. Yes. We’ll see him four months from now. Different topic. Or a year, depending on who you ask. No, no, I don’t want to wait that long. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Avery Heights, by the way, is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington and Hartford. Now, those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, right to memory care and even more. All you got to do is hop online and visit AveryHeights.org. That’s AveryHeights.org. Or call this number, 860-953-1201, 860-953-1201, to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike really any other in Connecticut. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Again, thanks so much for listening to your next chapter. Until next Saturday, have a good one, everybody. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/ "Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Life Every Day – Inspiration from Author James Flaherty") ## [Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Life Every Day – Inspiration from Author James Flaherty](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/stay-young-stop-thinking-old-and-love-life-every-day-inspiration-from-author-james-flaherty/ "Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Life Every Day – Inspiration from Author James Flaherty") August 1, 2023 We all need inspiration. In this episode amazing author James Flaherty gives us wisdom through learning about his life and his words. 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Listen as we explore ways to exercise your brain to help improve its function and participate in our brain exercise competition for a chance to win a complimentary luncheon or dinner for two at The Heights. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter. It’s a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Speaker 1 Hey, Brie Heights, they are a 43-acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now, this show will provide helpful hints and tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life’s journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Speaker 1 Siobhan, nice to see you. Nice to see you. Ah, this is, it is, I’m just trying to get myself relaxed and settled in here. Speaker 1 How was your week? Speaker 2 My week was good. I’ve been reading a lot. Speaker 1 I read every day. Speaker 2 Yes. What are you reading? Right now I’m reading a self-help book. It’s on marriage. Speaker 1 Ooh. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 You know, just seriously, last week I was just telling my producer, Jimmy J, I was at a book. I love reading biographies and autobiographies. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Love them. Yeah, same. I was at a bookstore. Speaker 1 This is a few years back. And because I was looking for a particular biography and I’m like, you’re probably not going to have it here. I’ll just have to. Speaker 1 I don’t. I’ll use Amazon, but I’m trying to help these, you know, some of these bookstores out because everybody. They’re closing. I know. Speaker 2 I love small bookstores. Speaker 1 Me too. And I wanted to help him out. And he’s like, oh, we don’t have that book here. Speaker 1 I can order it. I don’t know when it will come in. I’m like, I’ll take care of it. Speaker 1 That’s when I’ll resort to Amazon. But my point was, I said, there’s probably, what do you think sells more? Nonfiction, like what I like to read, or fiction? Speaker 1 And she goes, self-help books. I’m like, oh, okay. That wasn’t even one of the choices. Speaker 1 She goes, self-help books? We sell so many self-help books. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 And I go, well, take me over to the section. Sections took up like two and a half walls because there’s self-help on just about everything under the sun. Speaker 2 You always got to be working on yourself, always. And I’m always working on myself in all the categories, emotionally, physically, parenting, the kids, the whole thing. Marriage, you got to work on yourself. Otherwise, life just kind of drags on. Speaker 1 So it’s a marriage book. It’s a marriage book. On how to be, what, a better spouse? Speaker 2 A better spouse, yes. Really? Yes. Speaker 1 Boy, I should have gotten a copy of that book. Well, you know, we’re all works in progress, right? Yes, yeah. Speaker 2 It gives you daily things to do every day to encourage your spouse. Speaker 1 What is the name of this book? Speaker 2 It’s The Love Dare. Speaker 1 I’m going to look at it. The Love Dare. Speaker 2 Yes. It’s a movie, too, with Kirk Cameron. I can’t think of the woman that’s with him. It’s good. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 And he did it to his wife, this Love Dare book, and then she came back to him. It’s not a true story. Well, it could be a true story. It could be. Yeah. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 2 Yeah. But you can’t tell him you’re reading the book. So now, yeah, you’re going to have to wait. Does your wife listen? This is not good. Speaker 1 Sometimes she does. It depends on what time she gets up. Sometimes she does. Sometimes she doesn’t. Speaker 2 He’s not reading the book. Speaker 1 No. Never even heard of it. Well, listen. About self-help books, though. Yes. Do you apply everything that you read or is that easier said than done? Speaker 2 It’s a take what you need and leave the rest. I think that’s a Dalai Lama thing. Take what you need and leave the rest. Speaker 2 You can’t take it all. Because for me, I used to be one of those people, I have to believe the whole thing or I can’t take what I need. Now I take my little golden nuggets from it and then I use those. Speaker 2 And if something doesn’t agree with me, then I just put that aside. Speaker 1 See, I admire this. And I mean this. I don’t mind. Speaker 1 I don’t read many self-help books. I’m too busy reading nonfiction, actually. But I’m all for self-improvement. Speaker 1 I’ve read many of things. I’ll go online and I’ll just start reading things. Any issue you’re having. Speaker 2 Any issue. Just, yeah. It can be fixed, especially if it’s something to do with your mind. Speaker 2 We can retrain our minds. I learned this like three or four years ago. You can retrain your mind. Speaker 2 But you know what people do? Sadly, it’s easier to just toss in the towel, right? Yes. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. And I was doing that for years. Speaker 2 I mean, I’m in my 50s. So I just recently, the last three years, I retrained my brain. And it’s hard, though. You have to be so aware on a daily basis. Speaker 2 You really have to pay attention to what’s going on. You have to know your signs, your buttons, so that you’re not raging out. And you know when someone’s getting to you, getting to you, getting to you, you either have to disconnect from them, talk to them, or do something because you know you’re going to go off. Speaker 1 Is it ever too late? Speaker 2 No, that’s the thing. No, it’s never too late because people give up. I mean, I see it all the time, unfortunately, at my job, and that’s where you revive yourself. Speaker 2 It’s never too late to try to change. I see so many people change at ApriHeight, so many seniors, older adults. It’s amazing. Speaker 2 I think we were talking a few shows back about that lady where the two ladies became friends. And it was amazing just to see their onion peel back and their softer shell and just to see how amazing those two women were. And they became really good friends and they went to all sorts of activities and crafts. Speaker 2 And it just was so cool to see that because people can change. There’s never too late. You have to want it. Speaker 1 Well, that’s true. Yeah. You can’t – if somebody forces you to read something or watch something and you’re not there mentally, yeah, it’s not going to have any effect. But it does plant the seeds. Speaker 2 It’s never – like I’m telling you about the love day, Rebecca. Maybe you’ll read it and maybe three years from now, maybe you really will do it. You know what I mean? Speaker 2 So there’s nothing wrong with planting the seeds. People are like, oh, what’s the point of telling someone, giving them advice or telling them something because they’re never going to use it? It all plants seeds because there’s stuff that I’m sure you learned 10 years ago that today you go, oh, and it all starts to click. Speaker 2 And then you’re like, why didn’t I do it 10 years ago? Because your mind just wasn’t ready. And so it’s important as us, as people that have gotten to a better place to help people. Speaker 1 And by the time we have learned everything that we’ve read and experienced, it’s time to cash in our chips, right? I mean, we’re always evolving. Yes. I just wish that we could have started this process in my 20s so that when I got into our 50s here. Speaker 2 Yeah, but there’s our kids, our kids. I’m like, my daughter, I’m always, I tell her the truth. I tell her the truth. Speaker 1 No different than your parents. You don’t want to hear it. Speaker 2 But again, you’re planting the seeds. I know my son now who’s in his 30s. And I know that he’ll say to me, you know, like he’s in marketing of all things. And so he’ll use little tips. Speaker 2 Like he went to a trade show and it was dead. There was no people coming in. But he remembered what I used to do. Speaker 2 I used to walk around to all the booths and make relationships. And he says, Mommy, he goes, I got four different opportunities from that. And my boss was so impressed that even though this show was dead, I was able to build four different opportunities. Speaker 2 And that’s something that happened back when he was with me at probably a few trade shows. So you never know. Fascinating. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 That’s a fascinating topic. Speaker 2 Always give the advice. Speaker 1 Easier than taking it. Speaker 2 Yes. But you have to be able to take advice. I specifically surround myself with friends that now are not the yes people. the friends that are going to tell me the truth. Speaker 1 We’re always evolving. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 What’s going on over at Avery Heights? Speaker 2 At Avery Heights, we do a ton of stuff. We do a lot of fun stuff. Like we do a lot of word games and trivia, even like bingo. Speaker 2 We’re all about making sure we’re expanding the mind. It’s a use it or lose it type of mentality. So our activities calendar has gotten a reboot again. Speaker 2 With COVID, obviously, it was so hard and we had to cut so many things out. And every month we’re adding more things, which is great, which I love to see. And, yeah, more clubs and more organizations. Speaker 2 More people are coming in as well. Speaker 1 One of many older adults’ bigger fears, I would imagine, is losing memory or brain function. I know last week we had on people from Alzheimer’s Association and the big Alzheimer’s walk. And obviously, while we cannot control what happens in life, we can try our best to follow best practices for our health and well-being. Speaker 1 Exercising the brain may help improve brain function and boost connectivity between the different areas. This may also help protect the brain from age-related degeneration. So what do you think? Speaker 1 Today, we’re going to discuss some do’s and don’ts to protect our brain and maybe even doing some brain exercises as well. Speaker 2 I’m very competitive, so this will be a test of my self-help books to see if I can maintain my composure. Speaker 1 Well, let me start with something. How do you exercise your brain? Is it really just playing? Remember match game or match? Speaker 2 You’re trying to match things? Yeah, yeah. Little kids with that whole thing. Speaker 2 With the cards? Yes, that’s awesome. Yeah, I love that. Speaker 2 Yeah. And also doing math in your head. You know, like when you’re at the register and say, you know, you’re figuring out the tip. Speaker 2 Rather than sit there with your calculator, try to do it in your head. And that exercises the brain. Not always going to, you know, Google, spend a couple of minutes. Speaker 2 Like if you can’t remember a name of a movie, like spend a few minutes really trying to remember it with association. Like you can go through the alphabet. You can go, okay, what was the name of that movie? Speaker 2 Was it, you know, Apocalypse Now? Was it, you know, I’m trying to think of a B movie. Barney or whatever you know like instead of like just going to Google and looking it up try to figure it out and in your brain and or an actor or whatever those things are that we you know we have so you know we have years like I said earlier I was 50 years old so I have 50 years of like memories and so obviously I’m going to forget the movie that Sigourney Weaver was in with the aliens that’s a silly one because it’s aliens but very good wrong example bad example but You know what I meant. Speaker 2 You want to hear something crazy? Speaker 1 I couldn’t tell you what I had for dinner two nights ago. Speaker 2 But try to remember. Try to remember where you were sitting. Like if you try to remember where was I sitting, who was I with, what – have you cooked it? Speaker 2 Did I use a pan? Did I use a pot? Did I use my new whisk? Speaker 2 You know, that’s the stuff that helps you remember. What did I have for dinner? Was it a recipe that I used or was it, you know, my mom’s recipe? Speaker 2 And it’s always good to try to look back and remember something. That’s a way to exercise the brain. That’s one way. Speaker 1 Yet I have pretty darn good long-term memory. Yes. Like I can tell you when I went to Vegas 20 years ago. Speaker 2 Well, they say the heightened memories and then the low memories. So that was probably a good time, like a wedding or – Speaker 1 The first night I can tell you what I had for – where I had the dinner, what I ordered. Yes. Speaker 2 So that was really fun. That imprinted. Or the lows, like a friend dies or a parent passing away or a bad accident. You can probably remember everything that happened in that bad accident, but you can’t remember how you got here or whatever. Because they say the highs and the lows are really imprint on the brain. Speaker 1 How often should we be doing this? Speaker 2 All the time. Every day. Every day. Speaker 2 Every day try to like exercise your brain. Even with reading. We’re talking about reading, meditating, playing games, learning a new skill. Speaker 2 Like I hate the fact that I never wanted to learn anything new because it was always like people think that you just need to know how to do it. Like I’ve never played volleyball. But yet if I get on the court, I’m supposed to somehow know how to do it. Speaker 2 Don’t be afraid to not know. Speaker 1 You’ve never played volleyball. Speaker 2 Well, I’ve played volleyball. But I’m saying if I’ve never played volleyball, people would expect me. Like golf. Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh. It was a horrible experience. Someone was trying to teach me how to play golf because they were like yelling at me. Speaker 2 And I’m like, I’ve never played golf. Stop yelling at me. Speaker 1 I can barely play miniature golf. I keep hitting that windmill. It keeps coming around. Speaker 1 I’m like, oh, jeez. Give me a mulligan. Give me one more. Speaker 1 Come on. I’ll give one to you, too. All right, Gary. Speaker 1 Go again. And then I hit it again. Speaker 2 Yeah, but you got to keep trying. Don’t be afraid to try new stuff, you know, a new recipe, a new way. Go a new way to work. Speaker 2 You know, don’t go that same old way. Go a different way. You know, get lost. Speaker 1 That’d be on the way home from work. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Not on the way to work. No, because you’re out. We’re waiting for him. Speaker 1 I decided to take the long way in there, guys. I hope you don’t mind. Are there any things that can harm our brain function? Speaker 2 Yes, definitely. So sedentary lifestyle. So like if you’re – you just wake up in the morning. Speaker 2 You roll out of bed. You watch TV. You don’t get up to – you have all your food right there. Speaker 2 Maybe you even have one of those fridges. Speaker 1 Laziness in other words. Speaker 2 What you’re saying is don’t be lazy. Yeah, right. It’s not good. Speaker 2 So get up and exercise. Bad diet. You want to have low cholesterol and high in antioxidants. Speaker 2 You want to make sure you’re eating well. Like we said, there’s good. It’s OK of cheating. Speaker 2 We said that the last show is OK to cheat. But you want to make sure on the end, if you’re not eating well, make sure you have good supplements. Speaker 1 The irony in all this, Siobhan, is that it’s cheaper to eat crap. Isn’t it? Eat healthy. Speaker 2 It’s expensive. It’s very expensive. Yeah, it is expensive. Speaker 2 But you got to do it because it’s more expensive your health. Because if you’re, you know, if you end up with like, you know, Alzheimer’s, dementia, like we were talking about last show or cancer or any of that stuff. That’s going to be more expensive than it’s hard. Speaker 2 Aldi’s is good for getting food. It’s a grocery store. Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. That’s good for getting healthy food. Oh, is it really? Speaker 2 Yes. It’s very affordable and they have nice fresh produce and that’s really affordable. A lot of people do that. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Aldi’s right in my time. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I don’t think I’ve ever been in it. Speaker 2 Check it out. I mean, I don’t think they always stock the same thing all the time, but their fruit is very good. Yeah. And you can eat healthy there. They have a lot of healthy options. Speaker 1 I’m glad that there’s no things that we can do. All right. Let’s have some fun with a competition to exercise our brains. Speaker 1 Now, I think you mentioned that playing games like trivia, for example, is a game to play that exercises the brain. You can do that, right? Match. Speaker 1 We were talking earlier. Match you can do. So what are we going to do? Speaker 1 We’re going to compete right here in the studio. You and I. Okay. So you and I against each other. Speaker 1 Yes. And we’ll invite you, the listener, to compete at home or wherever you happen to be. You can call in your scores and the best score will win a complimentary lunch or dinner for two at where? Speaker 1 Where? Avery Heights. Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 The best place in town. Speaker 1 Well, as we heard a few weeks back. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. That show we were doing with the chef there or the. The dining director. Speaker 2 Yeah, he does an amazing job. And he is a chef. He just did a cooking demonstration over at the East Hartford Senior Center, and they loved it. Speaker 2 Like they were following him out the door. Really? Yeah, he did a great job. Speaker 2 Yeah, he made quinoa salad. He made like a Mediterranean diet soup, and then he had baklava, and they loved him. Yeah. Speaker 1 All right. I got to move along to another subject here because I’m getting hungry. Speaker 2 It’s time for the competition. Speaker 1 All right. So questions for a trivia quiz here. So we have our producer Jimmy J is with us in the studio. What are you going to do? He’s going to read the question. Speaker 2 He’s going to read the question. Keep us honest. Speaker 1 Okay. And then what do we each got to write down the answer? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 We’re keeping it in our head and then we can say it. Speaker 1 All right. So are we timed for each question, for each answer? Speaker 2 Yeah. He’ll time it. He’ll know when we’re taking too long. Speaker 2 All right. And then we’ll have the answer and then you say it or I’ll say it. And then, again, it’s the honor system. Speaker 2 So if I say the right answer, you can’t repeat me. Speaker 1 All right. Let’s do it. I’m game. No pun intended. Speaker 3 All righty, here we go. First question. In the 1930s, this product was advertised with the phrase, don’t put a cold in your pocket. Speaker 1 Hey, what does that mean? You’re humming the Jeopardy theme song. First of all, I wasn’t around in the 30s. Don’t put a cold in your pocket. So something that would be, you know, almost like you said, don’t put a comb in your pocket. Speaker 2 I think they used to use hankies, hankies. And then they stopped using hankies, so they started using something more disposable. Speaker 1 Oh, like a, oh, do I write this down? Yes. Speaker 2 Now that I’ve helped you. Speaker 1 That’s it, though. No more helping. A brand name or, okay. Speaker 3 All right. Let’s see what we got, Siobhan. Speaker 1 I got Kleenex. Speaker 3 Gary? Kleenex. Speaker 2 I gave that to you. Speaker 1 She did. Speaker 3 Give that to Siobhan. Speaker 2 No, I’ll give it to Siobhan. That’s the warm-up. Okay. Speaker 2 Now we’re competing. Now we’re competing. Okay. Speaker 3 All right. All right. The warm-up round is over. Speaker 3 Here we go with question number two. Okay. This coffee is known by the name of the Nashville Hotel, where it built its reputation. Speaker 3 Go, go. Speaker 1 Ah. Speaker 3 What? Seven more seconds, Siobhan? Yes Speaker 1 I’ve locked in Mike Speaker 3 Okay the answers are locked in Well at first Speaker 1 This is kind of mean At first I was going to put Oh I know that house That’s a nut house So the chock full of nuts But then I thought No I don’t That wouldn’t be too nice for this I thought I thought Maxwell House Speaker 3 Same Maxwell House is the correct answer Speaker 1 Right look at that I almost put Folgers Folgers You didn’t see these questions Before we because you brought them with you. Speaker 2 I printed them and brought them. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 2 Yes. Okay. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 3 Question number three. Yeah. This former planet’s discovery was announced on March 13th, 1930, Percival Lowell’s birthday. Speaker 1 A planet that was discovered in the 1930s on Percival Lowell. I don’t know who that is. Is that in relation to the planet? Is he an astrologer? I’d be taking a stab at this you seem to know Speaker 2 I think I know based on a couple of things I think if I read the question again Speaker 3 he might get it here’s the question this former planet’s discovery was announced on March 13th 1930 Percival Lowell’s birthday Speaker 1 former planet They took the status away. It’s the one that’s furthest out, I think. That’s not how I got it, though. Was it Jupiter? Speaker 3 We’re going to go and lock that answer in for him. That’s incorrect. Speaker 2 Pluto. Speaker 3 Pluto is correct. Speaker 2 But I didn’t get it because of the former. I got it because of the guy’s name. Percival Lowell, Pluto, right? Probably named it after him. Speaker 1 P.L. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Percival Lowell. P.L. Percival Lowell. Yeah. U-T-O. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 Should have been like a Disney character. Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, see, now that I would have gotten. Speaker 2 Pluto. Speaker 3 Okay, go ahead. Next question. Covering more than half a million square miles, it’s the world’s largest gulf. Speaker 1 Golf, okay. Speaker 2 I only know one gulf. Speaker 1 Yeah, I don’t think that’s, that can’t be the biggest gulf. Speaker 2 I can’t think of any of this. Speaker 1 All right. Speaker 3 I’m going to give you, I’ll give you both five more seconds. Four. Speaker 2 at least he’s not humming anymore Speaker 1 Gulf of I can only think of one Speaker 3 who answered last I think Siobhan answered last Speaker 1 so go ahead Gulf of Mexico that’s what I got is that right Speaker 3 that’s the only one I knew Gulf of Tonkin you know a little bunch alright next question Speaker 1 I’m winning you are you up by one you are yeah you got Jupiter I know you got Pluto Speaker 3 that? All right. I said this animal appears on Wisconsin’s flag and seal and its nickname. What? That’s the question. Speaker 2 I thought there was more to that. And its nickname is what? Speaker 3 This animal appears on Wisconsin’s flag and seal and it is its nickname. Speaker 1 Wisconsin has a nickname. and if it’s an animal it is I know it’s a cheese Speaker 2 the cheese people are Speaker 1 well yeah but that’s that’s not an animal Speaker 2 that’s not an animal a cheesy bear Speaker 1 oh how about Speaker 3 aren’t you supposed to write this down oh that’s right yeah that’s right write these down and I’ll come to I’ll go to Siobhan in about five seconds I don’t think I got it Speaker 2 I don’t think I got it Speaker 3 alright so what do you got Siobhan Speaker 2 I got Grizzly Speaker 3 I got it. Grizzly. Gary? A mouse. Speaker 3 Neither. Neither are correct. It is actually the badger. Speaker 2 Is it? Yes. I did not know that. I know the cheese thing. Speaker 1 Do they? I don’t know. Apparently so. We are just killing this. Speaker 2 Not in a good way. We’re exercising our brain. Yes. Speaker 1 Okay. By the way, folks, let me just do a quick thing here and then we can go right back. Anyway, I can delay you slaughtering me. You’re listening to your next chapter, which is a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 2 They can call their scores into the number. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. 866-537-1444. Okay. We’re ready. Hit us. Speaker 2 And again, I’m winning. By one. Speaker 1 By one. Speaker 3 I believe it’s four to three, correct? It is four to three. Gary’s got three. Speaker 3 Siobhan has four. Yes, I know. Moving right along, here’s the next question. Speaker 3 In 2013, Mario Cuomo said he finally saw this 1970s mob film and called it maybe a masterpiece. Speaker 1 Oh. Oh, yeah. Speaker 3 Everybody’s writing. Love this. Speaker 2 Love this movie. Of course. Speaker 3 They’re done. Gary, you go first this time. Speaker 2 Love The Godfather. Speaker 3 You have The Godfather as well. Speaker 2 I actually just watched it. I just watched it. For the first time? Speaker 2 Two years ago, I watched them all. And yeah. Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 They were so good. I couldn’t stop watching. I was like, they’re good. Speaker 1 I probably haven’t watched them in 10 years. But I have the DVD set. Speaker 2 He’s good. Al Pacino is amazing. Amazing. Speaker 2 One of my favorites. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 And what’s the guy that passed away? Oh, Brando. Con. Speaker 2 Con. Oh, James Con. Oh, James Con. Speaker 2 Yes. Yes. Sonny. Speaker 2 And Brando was. Oh, my gosh. That goes without saying. Speaker 2 I know. That was a good movie. Oh. Speaker 2 Classic. Classic. They just had an anniversary this year, right? Speaker 2 Was this year or last year? Was it the anniversary of The Godfather? Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I didn’t like the third one so much. Speaker 2 I didn’t mind it because I like when things get wrapped up. Like I like when they wrap it up. Speaker 1 I just thought they could have. They did such a phenomenal job with the first two. Even a sequel. How many sequels are as good as the first? But then I thought maybe the third one. Speaker 2 The third one was a little dragged a little bit. I think so. Yeah. And it didn’t have as much direction. Speaker 1 There you go. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 3 All right. All right. We got some more here. Speaker 3 All right. We’re ready. Located in Africa, its name means Great Mountain and has two peaks, Kimbo and Mawensi, that are seven miles apart. Speaker 3 Contestants are writing. All right. Speaker 2 I don’t know. Oh, wait. Okay. Speaker 2 I might know. Go ahead. You go first. Speaker 1 Kilimanjaro. Speaker 2 That’s what I thought. Speaker 3 Kilimanjaro is correct. Yes. Speaker 2 I didn’t spell it all out. K-L-I-N. Speaker 1 Spelling doesn’t count. Good enough. Speaker 2 It just came to me. Speaker 1 They almost tied it up there. Speaker 3 This word from Latin for unfold, also some believe the biological name for how mankind was created. This word from Latin for unfold, also some believe the biology name, excuse me, the biology name for how mankind was created. Speaker 1 I got to lock this something in here. It’s on the tip of my tongue, too. Speaker 2 Exercising the brain. Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Speaker 3 Reading now, and we’ll go in five seconds. Okay. Everybody five seconds to write their answers down. Okay. I think I got it. Speaker 1 I don’t know how to unfold. Go ahead. You go first. Speaker 1 Go ahead. I said evolution? Yeah. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 3 Evolution is correct. That is the answer. Unfold. Speaker 1 I did write it. Speaker 3 Do we have enough time for more? Speaker 1 We’re getting a two-minute warning soon. So you got about like one minute. We could probably do one more question. Speaker 3 Okay. One more question. This British Royal was Time Magazine’s Woman of the Year in 1953. Oh. This British Royal was Time Magazine’s Woman of the Year in 1953. Speaker 1 I don’t know. 1950, Woman of the Year. Speaker 3 Correct. Woman of the Year, 1953. I’ll give you seven more seconds. Speaker 3 I don’t know. And please be specific. Specific. Speaker 3 You’ll understand. All right. I think time is up. Speaker 3 Sorry. Gary? Speaker 1 Queen Elizabeth. Can we be more specific? Queen. Speaker 1 Well, we have which one right now? Her mother. I didn’t have that. Speaker 1 The first. Second. Something like that. Speaker 3 The fifth. Queen Elizabeth. The second is the correct answer. Speaker 3 You got it. So we’re tied. We ended this round with a tie. Speaker 3 Oh, my goodness. I think we’re good. Speaker 2 What a way to end it. Oh, my goodness. Wow. Speaker 1 Yeah, that one got me. This is a good example of brain exercise. Speaker 2 And it’s fun. And you can play trivia. They have all sorts of places. Speaker 2 Trivia Pursuit. Senior centers. You can go to, like, I think sometimes restaurants do it. Speaker 2 It’s fun. And you can have a question calendar, like a question a day, and rip it off and see if you can get that question. Speaker 1 I’ve seen those Speaker 2 but use your mind try to like not go to Google stay away from Google Speaker 1 love it alright folks you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter senior living with Avery Heights don’t forget to call in your scores and the best score is going to win a complimentary lunch or dinner for two at Avery Heights again here’s the number write it down 866-537-1444 Siobhan that was that was a lot of fun. Wasn’t that fun? It was. Speaker 1 I really appreciate it. It’s a good idea that you had. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. So long. 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She talks about Ageism and how her company is creating… **Categories:** Healthy Aging & Wellness, Purpose, Inspiration & Positive Aging **Tags:** Brain Health, Purpose & Meaning, Wellness --- ### [Five Wishes and Advance Care Planning](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/five-wishes-and-advance-care-planning/) **Published:** December 16, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** In this episode, Siobhan Mattingly, with years of experience in hospice, talks about the importance of advance care planning. Listen and learn about the Five Wishes program and how they help over 40 million Americans make the process of advance care planning easier. ### **Episode Transcript**+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights is a 43-acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now, this show will provide helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, how are you? Speaker 2 I’m good. Speaker 1 It’s good to see you. Speaker 2 Good to see you. Speaker 1 How was your week? Speaker 2 It was good. It was good. I’m doing a lot of planning. We’re heading to Disney. Speaker 1 Oh, I remember you mentioned that. When do you leave? Speaker 2 In two weeks. Speaker 1 Okay. So is Disney, the weather down there I know is, a buddy of mine just came back from Disney. Literally, I haven’t even seen him yet, but I know he came back Saturday. No, not today, it’s Saturday. I mean, a week ago Saturday. Speaker 2 Yep. Speaker 1 And he said that the lines are crazy unless you get some, they have a new, maybe it’s not new. Speaker 2 Disney Genie Pass. Speaker 1 Okay, yes, yes. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Where you jump to the front of the line. Yes. Speaker 2 You plan it out on your app and then you arrive when it tells you, like at 10 o’clock, I’m going on that ride. It’s actually really cool. I went years ago with my son and I remember we had to stand in line, like the fast line or whatever. And now it’s something where you actually have this genie thing and say like 10 o’clock and then you go back. It’s pretty cool. Speaker 1 So you’re not wasting half your day standing in line for a two-minute ride. Speaker 2 Exactly. But it’s a lot of planning with COVID to go to Disney now. You have to book all your parks. You have to book like everything you’re going to do, all your restaurant stuff. There’s no impulse. There’s no impulse. Why? You can’t go. Hey, because of COVID. They want to know how many people are going to be there. Speaker 1 In fact, it wasn’t even as prevalent down there as it was up here. Speaker 2 I think that they’re planning ahead. Like, what if we have, you know, something going on? And so if I’m booked for that park, they can reach out to me and say, hey, today we’re closed because of X, Y, Z. I think that’s why. Speaker 1 What if, what if, what if? Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. It’s a lot of planning. But they are amazing, though. I called up on a Sunday. And this guy on the phone, and he walked me through everything. Like, I had all these plans. He goes, no. He goes, do you mind if I switch everything around? And he told me which parks to go to on what day and how to do it. And he was really cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 See, look, you know all about this. I guess you have to because you’re leaving. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. Yeah. But it’s a lot of work to go to Disney. And it’s super expensive now, too. So, yeah, when I went with my son, it was like half the cost. Speaker 1 Right? It’s like $100 to get in right now. Speaker 2 Oh, the park you met. I’m sorry. I thought you meant the whole trip. Oh, no. No. Speaker 1 No, like each park, it’s like $100 to get in, isn’t it? Speaker 2 I don’t know. I got a package. And the package was pretty expensive. Yeah. Speaker 1 Like a package for like each of the parks? There’s three, right? There’s the Epcot. Speaker 2 There’s Epcot, Magic Kingdom. Speaker 1 And in the movie studio. Speaker 2 In the movie, but there’s one more. Oh, there’s four now. Yeah, there’s four. Animal Kingdom. Animal Kingdom. That’s Busch Gardens, isn’t it? No, no. Busch Gardens is a whole other company. Speaker 1 Oh, I don’t know what I’m living under a rock. Speaker 2 When you decide to go. Speaker 1 Let me put my Spotify on and my flip phone. Good Lord. I’m going to put my CD deck on in my car. I don’t know okay I’ll take your word for it Speaker 2 you have to have all these apps on my phone I got two apps for it on my phone and yeah it’s intense Speaker 1 now can you still see Mickey Mouse? Speaker 2 yes yes actually we’re having breakfast with Mickey and Minnie and a bunch of the characters we’re having brunch with them I’m really excited I’m like a little kid my daughter’s 13 my stepdaughter is 20 she’s 22 now and I think my stepdaughter and I are more excited than my daughter Because I said to her, do you want to do the character breakfast? And my stepdaughter was like, yes. And then she picked them all out, which ones she wanted to do. She’s never gone. She never got to go as a kid. Oh, well, then there. Okay. Well, that explains it. Yes, yes. Character breakfast. Yes, yeah. Speaker 1 You get to pick any of the ones that you want. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. It’s really fun. I did it with my son. My son’s 30 now, so he’s a little bit older. I have a huge gap between kids, but it was really fun. Yeah. Speaker 1 This is something, in order to do everything you want to do, you’ve got to get there. What time do they open? Like 8 o’clock? Speaker 2 Well, they do, but again, because you pay for the package and because you have all these genie passes and all this stuff, I paid for everything to make it convenient. I really don’t. I can plan out what time I’m going to get there. You can go there early, too. Because if you stay on campus, you can go at, I think it’s like 6 or 7 a.m., and it’s before the parks open. There’s like an hour that you can go, and that’s the best time to go. I did that with my son, and there was no one there. It was really good. But funny story, the one person I’m in line with behind me worked at Fox 61 and was from Connecticut. Who was it? I can’t even remember. It was one of the people that worked there, but it was hysterical. Speaker 1 Because I worked there for nine years. Speaker 2 I can’t remember. This was years ago. My son was like seven years old. So this was years ago. But it was hysterical of all the people I’m in line with. And I turned around and I was like, whoa. Speaker 1 I have a similar story. I went, all right, so in 1990, 32 years ago, I went to the spring break in Daytona Beach with a bunch of buddies of mine. Yeah. You know, college crazy. We took a day and we went to Disney because one of the people that was with us, like your stepdaughter, right? Yes. She’d never been to Disney. Never yet. Never been to Disney. Yeah. And we’re like, all right, it’s one day, it’s one day, all right, we’ll go. So we’re in line. Actually, this is the main entrance to get in. Yeah. And somebody said, I don’t know your name, but do you, either you look like somebody that I know of or you’re him, but I don’t know his name. And I’m like, all right, try me. It’s just a total stranger. And he goes, first, what state are you from? And I go, Connecticut. And he goes, it’s you. And I’m like, okay. And he goes, do you ever go on the Berlin Turnpike? And I’m like, oh, no. Oh, I live in Newington. Speaker 2 I know. But the Berlin. Well, anyway. Speaker 1 Well, yeah, because back then, all the no tell motels. Right. Yes, I know. Speaker 2 Back then. Yeah. Speaker 1 But we used to race cars on the Berlin Turnpike. Speaker 2 They still do. Yeah. Speaker 1 Well, not as much as they used. They cut back on that. Speaker 2 They have the ATVs now. Speaker 1 Yes, I know. Speaker 2 That’s a huge thing. Speaker 1 That I don’t get on. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 So I’m like, oh, my God. This is my neck of the woods. It probably is me. He goes, what is your name? I don’t know. my name is Gary. And he goes, I just see you every now and then up there. And I’m like, and he introduces himself. He goes, yeah, I live in, I don’t know, Meriden or something like that. And I’m like, well, nice to meet you. Speaker 2 Do you start to back up though? Well, you’re from Connecticut. I know you backed up. Cause like, wait a minute. You’re not, you know, Speaker 1 wait a minute. It was bizarre. And my friends were like, only you, Gary. That was bizarre. You’re in Florida. You’re in Disney. And some guy recognizes you from, you know, the Berlin. Speaker 2 That’s my family always says they were like, Only you would have this experience. It’s crazy. Yeah. You’re 1,500 miles away. Yeah. The problem is, you as well, I have, I mean, I have a unique look. I’m not bragging or anything like that. You and I both. So people recognize me, you know, like even from high school. But I don’t usually recognize other people. I ran into someone the other day at hockey, and she was like, oh, my gosh, Samad. And I’m like, yes, it’s you. Speaker 1 Oh, my God. Okay, so along those lines, I was at the West Farms Mall Christmas shopping one time. That was about 10 years ago. Speaker 2 And people are out of context. Speaker 1 Well, to make it worse, I must have been gazing out, thinking. So evidently, there was a person there who I did know because, I don’t know, like a year, maybe not a year, maybe almost a year later, he’s kind of giving me the cold shoulder. I’m like, did I do something, buddy? And he goes, all right. You kind of did, Gary. And I’m like, oh, my God, I’m so sorry. I don’t even know what I – what did I do? Please tell me. It’s unbeknownst to me. And he goes, you know, I saw you one day at the mall, and you looked right at me, and I’m kind of waving at you, and you just completely ignored me like you didn’t even know me. And I said, well, first of all, that’s not my character. I probably wasn’t even paying attention. Gary, you looked right at me, and I go, I don’t even know what to say to that. I go, I hate to admit this, I was probably not even looking at you, but thinking and just staring. I can’t articulate this. I go, but why would I ignore you? You’re, you know, you’re, I mean, I won’t say we’re not tight buddies, but a good acquaintance of mine. I know we know each other. And I said, well, number one, there’s no malice here. Please forgive me. And oh, my goodness, you’ve done nothing. And I apologize for that. And he goes, oh, okay. So I’m just, yeah, no problem. I’m glad I ran into you then. And he says, but yeah, I was always wondering what I ever did to you. I’m like, nothing. Speaker 2 Yeah, people do get upset if you don’t recognize them. Yeah. I have my husband and my daughter programmed. If I don’t say their name, that means I don’t know it. So if I say, hey, this is my daughter, Bella, she needs to say, hi. And you are. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 How do you know my mother? Speaker 1 That’s a great plan. Speaker 2 You got to program the close people around you to pick up on the queue. Because otherwise, yes. Speaker 1 I’m going to do that. I got my little guy, AJ. Yes. So if I forget. Yeah. How do you know my mom? Speaker 2 How do you know my dad? How do you remember the dad? Yeah. Speaker 1 Yes. All right. So I got to come up with a code word for him. Speaker 2 Oh, no. If you don’t introduce him. So if you say, hey, this is my son, AJ. And then he puts his hand. He says, hey, how do you know my dad? And then they’ll say, hey, I know him from. And usually if they say where they know you from, then the stories start to. It’s almost like data on Star Trek. All the stories start to roll in. Oh, I know you from. Oh, I knew your dad in high school. Oh, and sometimes it’s not good stories. Speaker 1 So just try to hide your face. Speaker 2 It’s like, oh, this guy. Speaker 1 Yeah, like the story I just shared with you. Oh, my goodness. I’m going to use that. Look at this. I’m so glad that we’re here with each other this morning. I’ve got all these wonderful ideas. What’s going on over at Avery Heights? Speaker 2 Good stuff. Good stuff. We had National Assisted Living Week, and part of that theme this year was joyful moments. So we just honored our staff. We did a whole staff appreciation on Friday. We had massage, chair massage. We had essential oils where they got free, like scrub for their hands. And she actually made a special joyful blend, which was really cool. And then we had special like craft cupcakes, macaroons, which were to die for. Elky Short and Sweet, little shout out. She’s amazing. And then she made these little like shooters. And they were like strawberry shortcake and pumpkin mousse. You can tell them all about the food. But it was really cool. Always. Our staff, you know, our aides, our nurses, our line staff, which is like our dining room staff, just everybody came down. And we had hostesses that were there. And as they came down, we said, you know, thank you for all you do. And it was just so we’re going to try to do something now once a quarter because it’s, you know, not just National Assisted Living Week. It was really good. And it felt good. You know, they work hard, especially now with the shortage and, you know, people just don’t want to work. And so and our staff just double times it all the time. And double times it with a smile. And that’s, it’s one thing to work the hours and go, oh, I’m working at that. You know, but it’s another thing, you know, the girl at the front desk even said to me, she goes, I asked her to do something that was kind of outside of her realm a little bit. And she said, hey, we’re a team here, you know. Speaker 1 That’s great. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 I like hearing that. Siobhan, tell me about the five wishes. Speaker 2 So the five wishes, I used to work in hospice, as I had mentioned. And I did a presentation on this many, many times. It’s so important to have your advanced care planning done. A lot of people don’t. And it’s really because I worked in hospice, I saw what happens when you don’t have your advanced care planning, meaning, you know, someone who’s going to be your health care proxy or your power of attorney. You don’t have your will done when you don’t have these things done. It just and who wants to do this stuff? You know, no one wants to plan for the end, but it’s important to do so. So this booklet makes it super simple. You don’t have to go to an attorney. You don’t have to read all sorts of stuff that you don’t understand. It’s really, really basic. And it’s legal and it’s legal. And it’s binding. You know, yeah. Speaker 1 You know, I’m a little surprised because I, obviously this is radio. There’s no visual here. But I have this in my hands. It’s, I don’t know how many pages, maybe 15 or so pages. It’s not a real thick book yet. It’s legal. You’re saying it’s a legal document. It’s legal, yeah. It’s not a lot of heavy reading here. Speaker 2 And it’s in regular, you know, common. Speaker 1 Commonese, right? Not legalese. It’s the common vernacular. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 All right. I’m going to start off, I guess, this morning with you on this topic with something that’s pretty elementary. Let’s start off with what define it. What exactly is advanced care planning? Speaker 2 So it’s definitely an ongoing process. So it’s something that you should start early. Like for myself, I’m in my 50s. I’ll admit it. And this is when, you know, you could even start earlier than that. But it’s all about the end of life. It’s like, what do you want to happen? You know, what are your values? What are your goals for the end? You know, having worked in hospice, I hate to, you know, it’s going to sound weird, but I saw some beautiful passings. I saw some beautiful quality end of life. And your whole life we plan, right? We plan our weddings. We plan college. We even plan our retirement. We were just talking about retirement earlier. But we don’t plan our end of life because we think it’s just going to, all of us want to go in our sleep, right? Speaker 1 But if it were up to me, I would sign up for that. Speaker 2 That’s not in the book. Just doesn’t work that way. We don’t get to choose. Doesn’t work that way. But it’s also definitely a discussion that you should have. Even though you’re using the book, you should still have it with professionals, such as your doctor, elder law attorneys, financial planners, and, you know, non-professionals like people, your loved ones. So you still should have a discussion with people, the people that are valuable in your life. And then you document it all in this book. Yeah. Yeah. So it’s something really good to have. Speaker 1 All right. So that’s what then. All right. So then I get what that is. What is now the Five Wishes program? And actually, how does it even help with people with this challenge? Speaker 2 Yeah. So what it does is it makes it simple. You know, it’s a scary thing. And it makes it friendly, too. You know, it makes it so it’s not so daunting. You know, just simple questions like, what music do you want? You know, like real questions. And that’s one of the things in hospice when we did intake. Those are the questions we would ask. By the time you’re at the end, though, it’s just overwhelming. And so if you document this earlier, and we do all have a vision of how we want to pass, right? You know, I know for myself, I want them to have a celebration, a life celebration. I don’t necessarily want, you know, back in the day I did because I was, you know, selfish. I wanted certain people to be upset. But now I really want people to be happy and tell funny stories. You’ll be there. You’ll tell this story. I remember when I was interviewing her, you know. Speaker 1 You wouldn’t happen to be Irish, are you? Speaker 2 Actually, I am. Are you really? Siobhan. Yeah. Oh, that’s true. Yes. Well, of course, Siobhan. I would say just enough to have the name. Yeah, a little bit. Speaker 1 Well, you know what an Irish funeral is, right? Speaker 2 I think those are awesome. I mean, this is. Speaker 1 That’s exactly what it is. Speaker 2 New Orleans is the same kind of way. It’s a celebration. And it should be, in my opinion, it should be that way. I want people to tell happy stories about me and laugh at me. My friends probably will have a whole host of stories, and I want that to be. Speaker 1 That is an Irish, and I say this because I’m part Irish, and on my mom’s side, when they do have Irish funerals, and by the way, I’m not embellishing this story. You’re eating and drinking. It’s a party. And you are sharing funny stories. Yeah. And no one’s leaving. And it is a celebration of life rather than this doom and gloom kind of morbid. Well, oh, you know, I mean, I don’t want to get into traditions or anything. Speaker 2 But yeah, well, who wouldn’t? Especially for my family. That’s what’s going to help them. You know what I mean? It’s going to help them to know it’s okay to move on. It’s going to help them to know it’s okay to laugh. It’s okay. Because a lot of times when people pass away, people feel like they can’t have any joy. It’s like, oh, my gosh, I’m laughing, but so-and-so has just died, you know, as opposed to laughing, you know, and having fun, you know? Yeah. Speaker 1 Who developed this, by the way? Speaker 2 This was developed by a wonderful gentleman, Jim Toey, and he was actually an attorney, and he was actually the attorney for Mother Teresa for 12 years. How do you get that gig? Yes, right? Yep, yep, until her death. And so he wanted to give back. He wanted to do something. So he created this organization called Aging with Dignity. He did this along with other doctors and nurses and lawyers. Because obviously hospice is all about passing, quality passing and quality death, quality of life even at the end. And so he wanted to develop a program so people could put together their advanced directors. So it’s almost like what I love about it is that he saw a need and he fulfilled it. Speaker 1 Boy, I’d like to have that on my resume. By the way, if Mother Teresa could hire me, then I must be good. I mean, you know. Speaker 2 What a heart. Speaker 1 Oh, my gosh. If you’re good enough for Mother Teresa. Yeah. All right. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 All right. So let’s go right into it. Can you list then what the five wishes are? Speaker 2 Absolutely. So the first one is the person you want to make your health care decisions for you and when you cannot make them. The second one is the kind of medical treatment you want or do not want. The third one is how comfortable do you want to be? And the fourth one is how you want people to treat you. And the fifth one is what you want your loved ones to know. and these are all good questions i mean again having come from hospice it’s like these are the things that people don’t know and it’s stress oh my gosh the people that are going to be left behind it stresses them out because they should be should we cremate should we not cremate should we have a licefurb should we have a funeral who should be there who should be there at the person’s bedside because a lot of times people come out of the woodwork you know cousin ann that that i don’t want to be there you know it’s it’s so it’s important and it’s very detailed what you want to have. Speaker 1 I was right about to say it looks like you’re covering issues or questions that most people would just, oh, wow, I didn’t even think of that. Yes. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter. This is a production of Avery Heights Senior Living along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Is the Five Wishes, though, I thought I heard you say this. I just want to make sure I heard correctly. Is the directive a legal document? Speaker 2 It is. Okay, I thought I heard. It is. It was created by the American Bar Association and the Commission of Law and Aging. And so it is legal. Now, here’s the thing. In 46 states, it meets all the legal requirements. In the other three states, it’s kind of you really have to look into the booklet. And on I think it’s like page three of the booklet, it actually tells you what goes on with those states. So some of the states, it doesn’t, you know, you have to have other people involved. Some of them you have to have them notarized. So it is a little tricky for those other, you know, four states. I mean, four states, it’s a little tricky for them. But for most of the states, it’s legal, which is good. Speaker 1 Which right here, five wishes in my state. If you live in the District of Columbia or more states, you can use it. If you live in one of the four states, Kansas, New Hampshire, Ohio, or Texas, you can still use the five of it. But you may need that extra step. Okay. How do you choose a health care agent? Speaker 2 So the important thing there is to remember not to choose the person who’s going to be extremely emotional. A lot of times people choose that person who’s close to you. Like I wouldn’t choose my best friend. You know, I wouldn’t choose some. Yeah. You have to choose the person who is practical, the person that can can kind of not disconnect, but the person that’s going to realize that I love, you know, Siobhan, let’s say Siobhan, for example, and therefore I want to follow her wishes. Not I love Siobhan so much that maybe I don’t want to be on machines and tubes. You got to pick that person that I hate to say this way, but is OK with pulling that plug. And it’s tough. And that’s why this takes a while to pick that person. A lot of times people pick that emotional person. And I will tell you as a professional, and, you know, right now I’m in senior living, but even haven’t been in hospice, that is the hardest thing. Because now you have to get that person to the point where they’re able to make decisions. I’ve had people not be able to make the decisions, not to be able to put the person on hospice, not to be able to maybe put them in a senior living community, not to be able to, you know, have certain treatments or give certain treatments. just not able to make a decision because they’re too emotionally connected and they don’t want to let go. And there’s nothing wrong with those people. And a lot of times people do too. If you hop over that person, they might get insulted, but then you have to explain to them, you know, this is going to be hard. And I did this so that you don’t have to go through that, but you want to pick that practical and you want to pick more than one person. Cause I’ve had it where someone passes away and you didn’t pick a second person. And now you can become a conservative of the state and that is very challenging that person knows nothing about you i can Speaker 1 before this came out i can almost imagine conflict within the same family particularly with siblings where it’s like no no dad told me that he wanted this no you’re wrong because we were just having dinner about a few months ago and he said no i want this song i don’t want you to do that um i’m Now it’s written down. See, exactly. Yes. And that’s what this does. Speaker 2 And that’s exactly what happens. And really bigger things like cremation or a casket or, you know, again, DNR, pull that plug or don’t pull the plug. Not to be. But it’s just like those are. You got to cover everything. Yeah. Important things. Yeah. Speaker 1 So once somebody, let’s say, fills everything out in the five wishes packet here and they sign it, then what? Speaker 2 So depending where you are, you have to have it witnessed or notarized, depending on someplace you just need witnesses and that’s it. Then you want to make sure you give it to everyone that’s close to you. But you also wanted to give it to your health care agent, your doctor, your attorney, and your loved ones. You want to give it – even if they’re not the person who’s listed as your health care agent, you still want to make sure they have a copy. Everyone you can think of. And then you want to put one – if you’re an older adult, even if you’re not, you want to put one on the fridge so that if the ambulance comes, there it is. And then they can see, okay, this person is a DNR or whatever these things may be. So you want to make sure everyone has it because the document is not worth anything. If only you have it hidden away, no one has the combination. It defeats the purpose. It’s like, what’s going on here? So you definitely want to make sure you give it to everybody that you think of. Speaker 1 When does the advanced directive take effect? Speaker 2 It takes effect when you can no longer make decisions for yourself, when you’re too ill to communicate, when you’re unable to do so. So you could be, you know, unfortunately in a coma or if your Alzheimer’s and dementia are in late stages. Or you could just be unable to make decisions for yourself. Sometimes, you know, you know, you unfortunately as older age, you could have, you know, depression or anything like that. So when, you know, a doctor deems you unable to make decisions anymore, this will take effect. So it’s almost just like a POA, a power of attorney. Speaker 1 Oh, I got another question here. Oh, I bet this happens. What if, I shouldn’t say what if, because I’m sure people are going to do this. What if somebody changes their mind and they want to change the document or information? I don’t mean as they’re filling it out. Oops, I made a mistake. I mean they fill it out, submit it. Okay, and time goes by and they go, you know what? Having second thoughts on something, then what? Speaker 2 So the first two, which are pretty heavy, your healthcare agent and what do you want to happen in the end. So if you want to be a DNR, DNI, which is do not resuscitate, do not intubate, or do not hospitalize. So this is a big, heavy section. You know, you don’t want to have, you know, be a feeding tube, those things. So those two sections, you want to kind of redo the document because those are heavy. If it’s the last three, then you can just cross off an initial. But if those first two, you want to redo the document because, you know, you want to make sure you’re not just crossing off, you know, or, you know, putting in whatever it may be. These are heavy, heavy decisions. And then once you do that, you want to go ahead and make sure you get that back out to everybody. You don’t want to use whiteout. You don’t want to like rip, you know, piece of pages off. Because then that can be questioned. It’s a legal document. Speaker 1 Why did that out? Speaker 2 It truly is a legal document. But the one thing is those last three wishes, you don’t have to be as intense about that. Speaker 1 I’m curious, though, if you’re are you filling this out alone or are you filling this out with your loved ones, your child, your adult children, your spouse? I can see the pros and cons of each because you can be influenced. Yes. And something that you may or may not want. But I always tell people that a separate set of eyes or a different train of thought could also help you make a rational decision. Sometimes if we’re just so focused on our – I know I’m guilty of this. I’ll read something wrong. And it’s like, oh, my – Gary, that’s not what it said. I’ll read it again. It’s like, oh, you’re right. Speaker 2 You get what I’m saying? Speaker 1 Yeah. Should you do this alone or – Speaker 2 It really depends. It’s like anything. And again, keep referring to hospice. But what you realize is everyone’s unique. So it’s like anything. It’s like when you’re, I hate to say trivialize it, but if you’re picking a college. So do you do that alone? Maybe. Maybe sometimes, like if you’re going to, like my daughter wants to go to like California and I’m like, what? You know, so she’s not going to be making that. I’ll go visit them with her. But clearly when she makes a lesson. They want to be 3,000 miles away. She’s not going to make that decision with me. So, yeah. So you want to, it depends. You know, you want to choose those people who are like, and that’s how you weed out and find your health care agent. That person who’s going to be practical is that person who sits there and looks at this with you and helps you make decisions without putting in their own little two cents. Oh, you’re a DNR. Oh, my gosh. It’s like they understand where you’re coming from. Speaker 1 This is such a valuable document. It really is. Do all your clients get this? Speaker 2 We are going to be doing a presentation at Avery Heights, definitely. Speaker 1 This is brilliant. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Really quick. We’re running out of time. How do people find out more information on this? Speaker 2 So online at fivewishes.org. And you can actually fill this out online as well, which is great. You can order the booklet or fill it out online. I kind of like to do both. I’m kind of like, you know. Speaker 1 As long as they match up. Yeah. She got one decision here and a different decision there. Speaker 2 I meant read through the booklet and then fill it out online. Yeah. So I have one in front of me. Because sometimes like reading online, like you were saying, to understand it better. And then if you don’t, for some reason, if you’re not an online person, just go ahead, give me a call. And I can give you information on how to reach out in terms of phone numbers and so forth. Speaker 1 So you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. For more information on today’s topic, the five wishes, please call 866-537-1444. I’ll repeat that for you. It’s 866-537-1444. Now, the first three callers, you’re going to get a special lunch and tour over at Avery Heights. Wow, great stuff, really, with all of this. This was a great show. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next Saturday, have a good one, everybody. Solo. 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Caregivers and seniors themselves want the highest quality of care and surroundings that are both beautiful and stimulating, but aren’t sure how to afford it. This episode we are going to be speaking about what one might need to know about paying for a Senior Living Community. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one of a kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Now, this show is dedicated to empowering older adults with helpful resources, ideas, inspiration and tips to encourage them on life’s journey. Our production is also dedicated to the younger generation so they can better understand how to develop greater communication and enjoyment for those elders in their community. Your next chapter is hosted by me, yours truly, Gary Byron, and Avery Heights Senior Living Specialist, Siobhan Mattingly. Siobhan, good morning. Speaker 2 Good morning. It’s great to see you. It’s great to be here. How was your week? It was really good. Was it? Speaker 1 I’m glad to hear that. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I’m glad. Speaker 2 Went to see a UConn game. UConn hockey. Oh, UConn hockey. Yeah. New stadium. It was awesome. Speaker 1 Everybody automatically, they go to basketball for some reason. Speaker 2 Yeah. Well, my daughter is a hockey player. So, yeah. She’s 13. She’s a force to be reckoned with. Speaker 1 I’ll bet. Yeah. Speaker 2 13\. Yeah. She’s no joke. She’ll only be playing. She’ll be nine, though. They start you early. They start you at like two years old. They got kids out there on skates. It was funny. When she was doing Learn to Play, there would be, you know her nine years old and there’ll be these little people and she was always so nervous about Speaker 1 stepping on them i can barely ice skate forget i can’t even imagine oh she can skate yeah shooting Speaker 2 pucks into goal yeah it’s amazing uh she actually went to skating camp at um what is it in uh west harford veterans uh skating and it was amazing like you know she was going there and then one day i dropped her off and i hang out for a little bit and i’m seeing her skate around this rink and Speaker 1 i’m like whoa yeah she really yeah she’s a good skater i had no idea there was even such a thing It’s skating camp. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. Well, there’s other stuff they do. They have lunch and other activities, but it’s at the skating rink. And then they went across the street to the pool to Cornerstone, to the pool. Speaker 1 Does she have a favorite hockey team? Speaker 2 She likes the Bruins. She’s a New England girl. She likes the Patriots. Good. She likes the Celtics. Nothing wrong with that. Yeah. She’s a New England girl. Speaker 1 I don’t follow hockey. I mean, I remember the Wailers. I remember going there years ago. Yeah, I love going to the Wailers. Speaker 2 Yeah, that was fun. Speaker 1 You want to know? I’ll be very candid with you, completely honest when it comes to hockey. So I can’t watch it on television. I just, I can’t get into it. However. Live. Live. Speaker 2 Live sports is the way. You’ve got to peel me away. Yeah, live sports to me. There are certain things. I think years ago I took my mother to the Pilot Pen. That was years ago. I don’t even know what it’s called now. Speaker 1 They covered that. I don’t think they have it. They don’t even have the New Haven Tennis Center anymore. Oh, wow. They built on it. Speaker 2 I took her there, and I remember, like, I would take her, and then I started taking her every year. I wasn’t a big tennis person, but live. I actually took her to New York. What’s the New York tournament? I don’t even know the tournament. It’s New York Open. New York Open, yes. Or the U.S. Open. Oh, U.S. Open. U.S. Open. I took her there. And I loved it. That place is really cool. Who was? McEnroe was in the booth. And we actually walked by. We were such idiots and waved. Speaker 1 I have a quick memory. I covered the Pilot Pen for two years. Yeah. for television. And I interviewed Monica Sellis and Lindsay Davenport. And I met Gene Wilder. Really? The actor. Wow. He was funny. Funny? Speaker 2 And his wife, Gilda Radner. She was hysterical. I know. Rosanna, Rosanna, Dana. That’s right. From the original Saturday night. We’re so old. Speaker 1 Oh, but come on. That’s when they were the funniest. Speaker 2 But the movies that… That is when they were the funniest. Oh, yeah. And when Chevy Chase, even the next generation, Eddie Murphy. Joe Piscopo. Joe Piscopo. Yeah, that next generation. I mean, not that it’s not funny now. I know, yeah. Speaker 1 You remember Silver Streak, the movie? Yes. Or Star Crazy or Richard Pryor? Speaker 2 Richard Pryor, yes. He was funny, too. Oh, my God. Speaker 1 Those two together. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 I mean, you sit there. Actually, I asked him a couple of questions when I came. He just looked at me like, how do you remember? I mean, he’s long since passed away, too. But this tells you, this is in the early 2000s. Speaker 2 So many people passed away at the end of 2022. It was sad. I know, right? Speaker 1 It was like… Speaker 2 Barbara Walters. Was that? No, that was… Speaker 1 No, that was earlier this year. Speaker 2 This year, yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 That was just like a week ago. Speaker 2 That’s so sad. It makes you feel old when people that you grew up with are passing away. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. Just when you thought like it was… I remember it being December 30th. And it was like, all right, look, that’s… Boy, I’d be glad to get rid of this year. And then New Year’s Eve would come along and, well, let’s sneak one more in here. let’s throw let’s throw Kirstie Alley Speaker 2 in there yeah Speaker 1 I loved her I know right Speaker 2 yeah good god everybody’s they’re kicking yeah yeah but it’s people they’re older but it’s weird because we grew up with them well you know what it is Speaker 1 we watch the reruns and they don’t age we have right but they stay the age that they were already recorded Speaker 2 all the golden girls are gone yeah Speaker 1 oh yeah they’ve been gone for a while though right Speaker 2 um no the last one was oh Betty White last year last year yeah yeah she was yeah Speaker 1 99 yeah she like died like a month prior to her 100th birthday. Speaker 2 Yes, yes. Speaker 1 In People Magazine, they had already put out the 100th. Remember that? When they released it? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 As if she was like, they’d live to the 100th. Speaker 2 She was great. She was funny. Speaker 1 Oh my goodness, yeah. Speaker 2 She was in that movie, The Proposal, with Sandra Bullock. Speaker 1 I didn’t see that one. Speaker 2 She played the grandmother. Yeah, she was funny. Speaker 1 I remember her on Golden Girls and the Mary Tyler Moore show. Speaker 2 Yeah, we just showed it at our community and our movie theater. Speaker 1 I talk about your movie theater every day in your library, in your boutique, in your hair salon. Salon and all the amenities over at the Heights. Speaker 2 In the summer, we’re going to have a patio slash cafe. It’s going to be nice. Right now, it’s just all built and it’s nice. So we don’t have any chairs or anything like that. So when I’m doing tours, it’s funny. We’re like, oh, did you see our new patio? And they’re like, no. And then I show it. So I’m like, oh, because it’s basically just blocks. Speaker 1 Do you have a big picture of what it’s going to look like? Speaker 2 They do, yeah. Yeah, actually, in Bill’s office. Speaker 1 So it’s new. Speaking of the Heights, what’s new over there? Speaker 2 What’s new over there? So I think last week I was talking about our Dine and Dash. I’m going to talk about that again. Yeah, you do. Yeah, the Dine-In Dash. That’s going to be fun. Yeah. So we’re going to have Tim is going to be cooking, our dining director. Yep. Speaker 1 Our chef. That’s big. Tim is one of the best chefs. Forget about senior living. Folks, he’s one of the best chefs in Connecticut. Yeah. How do I know this? Listen, I got no dog in the fight. Okay? I’m not a cook. You might be getting a free meal, so. Well, I did. I ate breakfast and lunch there. Yeah. And both were outstanding. But that lunch, I remember looking at Jimmy J, my producer, who’s off camera right now, but we were both eating lunch together on this day, and we both looked at each other like… Speaker 2 Legolam. Yeah, Legolam. Speaker 1 You can’t get this at some restaurants, and here I am at a senior living facility eating swordfish. Really good swordfish. Speaker 2 He marinates. He marinates. I’m not a big swordfish person, and it’s funny because they had it, and this was a while ago when I first started working there. He goes, oh, you got to go have some, and I’m like, eh, I don’t know. He goes, just try a little bit. So moist, so good. He does a good job. Speaker 1 He’s big on the marinades. Yes, he is. I could tell because I was amazed. Mr. Marinade. You would think it would be bland because you’re cooking for mass people. Speaker 2 That’s the other thing. You would think it would, but it’s not. Speaker 1 No. Speaker 2 Anything but. I should give a shout out to Paul too. Paul actually cooked that meal. Speaker 1 Oh, did he? Speaker 2 Yeah, with Tim. Speaker 1 Then a shout out to you, Paul. Speaker 2 Paul’s our chef. You’re right. This buds for you, right? Speaker 1 You’re getting me hungry here. Early in the morning. Speaker 2 I know. I think my stomach actually just gurgled. Speaker 1 See? Next time we’ve got to have Tim. Speaker 2 I know. We should have this catered. Sponsored by the Heights Dining Room. Speaker 1 I’ll tell you this. Next weekend, Tim, if you’re listening, a couple of bacon, come on. I’ll make it simple on you. A couple of bacon, egg, and cheese on a biscuit or something like that. Speaker 2 Some hash browns, too. Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 Well, you’ve got to have some hash browns on the side. Exactly. You can do it. Three plates. Three plates. Don’t forget Jimmy J. He’s behind the scenes. Exactly. So today we’re going to be speaking about what one might need to know about paying. Yes. For senior living services. Great topic. Yeah. I mean, people are considering moving to an assisted living community or need even more care, but can’t achieve that at home. Caregivers and seniors themselves want the highest quality of care and surroundings that are both beautiful and stimulating, but they’re not sure how to pay for it. You know what I give you a lot of credit for, Siobhan? This is usually a taboo subject that a lot of places wouldn’t want to talk about. It’s like, well, let’s talk about all this other stuff. Let’s not talk about cost, price, how to pay for any of that stuff like this. But I give you a lot of credit. But I suppose if you think about it, it’s really to your advantage and the advantage of this show so that, you know, this is not an impulsive decision. This takes time to even reach a decision. And then, of course, well, how can it be paid for? So, yeah, let’s delve into it. Does health insurance or even like let’s say Medicare, does that pay for assisted living at all? It doesn’t. Speaker 2 And that’s the biggest and hardest question. I’ve had a lot of times when I take a phone call, I do like what we call a discovery and I get the information from the people. And I try – I delve into financials but I try not to delve too deep into financials because you don’t want to kind of rule anyone out. And then they come in for the tour and then they’re like, oh, and they’re all excited and we’re walking around and they’re like, but health insurance is going to – health insurance doesn’t pay for it. And it makes sense because I was talking to someone the other day, you know, you know, we all, you know, we weddings, we have babies, we buy cars, we buy houses and everyone around us does those things. Right. And you can get advice from people about those things. Senior living. When do we talk? We talk a lot about it. But really, in real life, how often do you talk about unless you’re there? People don’t talk about that till you’re there. Like I could talk to you about my grandkids and this and that and, you know, the best toys to get and all that stuff. I’ll talk about all. And then you’ll remember, you’ll be at the store. Siobhan mentioned the Fisher Price, blah, blah, blah, right? We never talk about senior living. We never talk about senior living and regular conversation unless you’re there. Speaker 1 So how do we change that narrative? How do we change it to be more conversational? Speaker 2 Yeah, I think it just needs to be more planning. I think that so many of us are out there. And I know the last story we had, we talked a lot about planning. I think so many of us are out there and we just don’t know. How I got into this industry is because I became the conservator for my mom. And I was green. I remember I was at a chamber event. I remember this. And I was crying because I’m like, what am I going to do with my mom? And I had this lady. She came up to a really good friend of mine, still friends with her. And she’s in Florida now. But she grabbed my hands, as she said. And she gave me advice of a couple different places and kind of calmed me down. And my mom ended up moving into one of those places. But before that, I knew nothing. And I’ll tell you what, the mistakes that I made, even after I found the place, I mean, financial mistakes, you know, mistakes with her, you know, her care. There were so many mistakes, so many things I didn’t know. And unfortunately, there weren’t people there to, you know, the professionals to guide me through it. And that’s why I’m huge on having it. And you’ve met several of them, the right professionals for me to partner with in terms of resources. That’s like because I don’t last thing I empathize. I feel it when people come to see me and, you know, we do get a lot of people from other communities and they’ve been done wrong or what have you. And I empathize with that. I definitely I’m not sitting there just nodding because I’m the marketing director. I really feel it. I feel it. Look at your background. Speaker 1 I don’t think you choose a profession like this. You know, I think it chooses you. Speaker 2 It does. And it’s funny because I went I was in hospice for a while and then I thought about becoming like a personal trainer and all these things. And like, you know, it’s almost like what do you want to be when you grow up or whatever? it is, kind of midway through my life. And then I ended up, I was like, you know what? I really enjoy working in a senior living community. And I really have been blessed and lucky to find the Heights because it’s really fun. Our team is amazing. Our team is amazing. Speaker 1 How many people can actually say that they’re doing what they’re meant to be doing? I mean, you know how many people in life, and I hate to say it, I know people who make a lot of money and can’t stand the work that they do. Yeah. You know, and they’re like, well, Gary, I’m going to give up this job. I mean, I’ll never make this in this other field that I, you know, that I really would like to be. And it’s like. Speaker 2 Which is sad because in this day and age, it’s like I hate to say it. It’s like, you know, kind of the go for it type of mentality. But in a way, it’s kind of like, you know, our life. This is it. Like you always say was a thing. This is not a dress rehearsal. So if you’re not happy in what you’re doing, I mean, it’s challenging. I say it as I’m sitting here because I’m happy now. But I’ll tell you what, most of my life I didn’t particularly like where I was for whatever reason. It just wasn’t a good fit for me. Speaker 1 Like a lot of people. Speaker 2 Yeah. But this, I really, you know, to go into work, I don’t mind going into work. Like I literally came from Disney months ago. And normally I’d be like, oh, I got to go back to work. But I do not mind going back to work. You’re blessed. Yeah. Speaker 1 You really are. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Very grateful. Very grateful. Speaker 1 So then how do you pay for this then? You know, how do you pay for this? Speaker 2 Well, it’s definitely, it’s private pay. So there are some senior living communities that you can get state or there’s federal funding for them, but most of them are private pay. There are some that have like some HUD funds that they’ll get and different things like that throughout the state, which is good to know. But primarily it’s your income, your savings, what you have in the bank, your retirement, your annuities, your investments and things like that. So primarily that’s how you pay for it. There’s also obviously veterans, veterans benefits that are out there. And we talked about long-term care insurance as well. Speaker 1 So the government, I suppose, you said a moment ago there’s federal grants or federal things you can qualify for, but they’ll provide. Speaker 2 But there’s not a lot of it. It’s few and far between. There’s a place in Hartford that is, I believe they’re state and federally funded as an assisted living. I think they take Medicaid. And there’s some in Glastonbury that are kind of like HUD housing. I think it’s a requirement in Glastonbury. But for the most part, you know. Speaker 1 But come on, Siobhan. You’ve got some experience here. You can give us some tips here and helpful hints and tidbits to come on. You must your experience. You’ve got a few tricks up your sleeve that you can share. Speaker 2 It’s funny. I mean, sometimes people have if they have limited funds. What I always tell them to do is, you know, it’s old school, do an Excel spreadsheet, take that Excel spreadsheet and kind of map it all out. Because, you know, even if you’re going to go on Medicaid and you have to go to a, you know, into skilled nursing environment, at least you can kind of spend some time within an independent or an assisted living. And so you just have to plan it, plan it the right way. One of the things I love about working at the Heights is we have the wonderful Roseanne, our social worker, and she really kind of helps people as well as myself when I have people come in to do that, to be able to plan. And so there are ways, you know, you know, selling your home. You know, if you or another thing that people don’t realize they could do, you can rent out your home as well. You know, there’s a lot of real estate agencies that will do the property management for you also. So the rent from your home you can use. If you have a house, sometimes you can get what they call a bridge loan, which is a short term loan. And with that short term loan, you’re able to pay for the assisted living or independent living while you’re waiting to move. Because a lot of times people always feel like they have to sell the house before the person can move. Speaker 1 The first thing I thought of. Speaker 2 And sometimes it’s a dangerous situation. So if someone needs memory care or assisted living and you have them in the home, and sometimes people have the person living at home by themselves, which is really dangerous, and not getting any type of in-home care, they’re waiting to sell the house. Well, you know, I mean, the market has changed, obviously, for selling homes, so who knows when the house will sell. So a bridge loan is something or a reverse mortgage. And all these things, you know, I’m not a financial professional, so all these things you should definitely confide in a financial professional, your elder law attorney to make sure that it’s right for you. You don’t want to get into trouble either and be in a bad upside down kind of financial situation. Speaker 1 Would this include cashing in your 401k? Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. Your retirement funds. Oh, your retirement. Yeah. Your life insurance. Sometimes there’s some life insurance policies. I think we were talking about that on the last show that you can use part of that as well. You can kind of use some of the cash value of that to be able to pay for it. Speaker 1 What happens then if you outlive it? Yeah. Everything is cashed in and all of a sudden, are you out on the street? Well, there’s a couple of things. Speaker 2 So if you’re a veteran, good news, there’s a veteran’s benefit. It’s called the AIDS and Attendance Benefit. Or sometimes people call it the veteran’s retirement benefit. And that is for assisted living. So you have to have a certain amount of what they call activities of daily living. So like showering or need someone to help you cook or clean or something to that effect. And you can, as an actual veteran, I think it’s almost like a little over $3,000. Now it’s up to that. So based on your assets and income, it depends on what you can get. And that can kick in early too. So you don’t necessarily have to get that when you’re out of money. It can kick in early and kind of spread those dollars a little bit. So that’s something for veterans that’s good and surviving spouse as well. So that’s something can kick in, which is helpful. And your expenses. You have to really look at your expenses. You really have to look at them. You really have to pay attention to, you know, a lot of times people are spending money on things like, I hate to say it, but like, you know, magazines or, you know, who knows things, you know, maybe you’re overpaying for your prescriptions. I know for my mom, she was paying like a huge amount of money. She wasn’t using her insurance. And in addition to that, there’s actual programs in Connecticut that can help you pay for your prescriptions. So there are different things. So you got to reach out to professionals. You got to, you know, you know, reach out to, again, like an elder law attorney financial planner. If you’re a veteran, the VSO, the local VSO, every town has a VSO, a veteran services officer, reach out to them or just reach out to us. I mean, I don’t have a problem, you know, if you never move in. I don’t have a problem if you give me a call. I can walk you. I walk through people through stuff all the time because I truly, with this job, like, again, the experience I had with my mom really, like, affected me on so many levels. So I love passing on information to help people to figure this all out, to figure out the landscape. Speaker 1 You know, and keep in mind, you’re not going to have the grocery bill anymore. You’re not going to have to pay, right? Exactly. Yes. That’s why you do that spreadsheet. Speaker 2 So you look at Speaker 1 Your Eversource bill. Or it’s all covered. Yep. So, I mean, unless you need money in your pocket. Speaker 2 And make sure you get rid of those things. A lot of times people don’t cancel their auto insurance. They don’t cancel their home insurance. And these things are like lingering out there on auto pay and not coming out. So that’s really important. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most exciting spots in Connecticut. It’s actually on the border of Newington, West Hartford, and Hartford, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. How can seniors, I don’t know, kind of like formulate a game plan ahead of time for these finances, in order to pay for these assisted living. You kind of touched on it a moment ago. I caught some of that. But can somebody truly at the age of 65, let’s say they retire, can they just start socking money away? Do they add a clause or an addendum or something on there or an option on their insurance where from here on in, I want to purchase a memory care rider on your insurance. Speaker 2 Yeah, I think all these options. I think you can do stuff like that. Like, I think that the main thing is, is just like anything else. Like, you know, again, I used to work in hospice. So we always told people to come up with a plan. There’s the five wishes booklet that you can do to come up with a plan. The same thing with life. I think a lot of times what happens and not so much for our generation, but I think that the past generations, their, you know, retirement plan or growing old plan was to stay at their home. And they never really thought about, well, what if I get sick? Well, what if I, because basically what they always saw is probably their loved one going to, right, to like a nursing home. So they didn’t realize that there’s like this in-between world that’s available. So I think that, you know, really sitting down and saying the what ifs, you know, and there’s a lot of resources online. AARP is a great resource to kind of help you come up with a plan. and come up with what if. What if I have to go to an assisted living? What if I, you know, have to have like one floor living and have to go to an independent living community? What if I have to go to memory care? And then, you know, bring in the professionals. I think it’s important to not be afraid to ask for help. The other one I was going to say too before is like your family. You know, I contributed to my mother’s, you know, care. And I’m not saying all people, and I always tell people, I said, you know, I’m saying this to you because I did it. And so a lot of times the older adult, oh, no, I don’t want you to do that. And I’m not saying, you know, if you’re struggling, you should be contributing to your parents’ care. But if you’re not, and you’re doing okay, you know what I mean? $1,000 a month, $500 a month can go a long way in helping out your loved one. You know, it’s not necessarily someone’s responsibility. It’s just a nice thing to do. But the older adult, they’ve got to be willing to take it too. And a lot of times it’s not the kids that aren’t willing. It’s the older adult that’s like, no, no, I don’t want Speaker 1 you to do that you know since you are a continuum of care facility i i’m just trying to think what like at what point do you typically um have somebody move in is it early on or is it when family members notice mom is starting to lose her memory yeah you know or do or do they even wait further and it’s no longer mom starting or dad starting to lose their memory they have lost their memory i mean so are they are they moving in more early on you know when they’re still driving they’re still out late at night they’re maybe they don’t come home at all that night you know and um they’re basically it’s a country club for them you know or so that’s that phase or is it they’re starting to lose some of their memory or the third one they’ve already really all of it Speaker 2 Really? My ideal is early. And the reason why I say early, especially if you know down the line assisted livings in the future. So if you have an underlying condition like dementia or Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s and you know it’s better to move in early. Why? Because at least you get to enjoy the community before you need assisted living and you get to make friends and you get to know it better. Because when you move someone in when they’re, for lack of better words, like compromise or needing services, it’s harder. Because now you’re, you know, you’re not at your full capacity. And so you can have fun and enjoy the community and get to know it. And those are the people that I see do well. The people that have been, like we have people that have been in our community for like 16 years, 20 years, for a long time. They started off in our cottages and then they’ve moved through the continuum. And those are the people that I see do very well. They, you know, we have someone the other day that’s potentially, you know, moving to our memory care. But she has all the support that she needs. She has, you know, she knows the social worker. She knows our director, Bill. She knows even the memory care director. And so she doesn’t have to be so tense about it. She can feel comfortable knowing that she knows these people. And so if her husband has to go into memory care, she’s not, you know, she’s upset, of course. But at least we can hold her hand and she’s not pulling away because like, well, who are you? You know what I mean? And so I think that, you know, it’s a lot. I mean, there’s a lot of trust in this. And so I think that’s important. Speaker 1 I knew you would be the right person to ask this. And I’m not surprised, in fact, on how you answered it. And you know what? You’ve even brought something up that, as I’m listening to you, it does make more sense the earlier you come in. Yes. Particularly when it comes to memory care. Because just like, you know, at your home, you know the lay of the land. Right. You know. In other words, it could be 3 o’clock in the morning and you got to pee. No, I’m not even, folks, I’m not even trying to be funny. But you don’t have to turn a light on, right? I could go from my bedroom to the bathroom without putting one light on, disturbing anybody, wake anybody up the whole nine yards, go there and come back. Why? Because I know from living there. Exactly. I know how to get to my bedroom. How to navigate. Right. And I want it like, now let’s take that premise and transition over to senior living. You’re now in a whole new room, cottage, apartment. Your bedroom is not that distance and it’s not down the hall to the right. It’s now, you know, but see, it takes your cognitive skills. Exactly. You compute that to memory so that perhaps, I’m hoping you don’t need memory care, but should you, you’ve already, you know, imported that into memory. Does that make any sense? Speaker 2 And you make friends and stuff, too. You know what I mean? Speaker 1 That’s the bonus. Speaker 2 Yeah. That’s the bonus. I mean, there’s some people that are like buddies. Like, it’s so neat to see them walking their dogs or, you know, looking out for each other. It’s really nice. Yeah. Speaker 1 That’s, yeah. That’s the icing on the cake. Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 Yeah. Without a doubt. I know we’ve run out of time here. Oh, my goodness. This always happens when we get together. Speaker 2 I know. I know. There’s other stuff, too, but we’ll talk about it next time. Speaker 1 I’ll give you. You got 30 seconds. Speaker 2 30 seconds. So consider a roommate. There’s a companion living, which is awesome. You know, a la carte services. So if you’re assisted living, ask them about a la carte because you might not need a whole big package. So a lot of times don’t jump to a package. Ask for that. And ask about moving incentives when you go into assisted living. Ask about specials. Negotiate. Don’t be afraid to negotiate. and ask about, you know. This is negotiable? Yeah, you can negotiate, of course. If you’re being sincere, if you really need the help, you can always sit there and negotiate. There’s always a place to negotiate. Speaker 1 I’m glad I gave you the extra 30 seconds because I think none of us knew that. Speaker 2 I always tell people to negotiate. Speaker 1 All right, folks. Speaker 2 People might not like me for it. Speaker 1 No, but this is why we like it. This is why this show is important. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter of Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. And when you come to live in the Heights, you not only get a great community of friends, but also you’re right in the heart of Hartford, right with the arts, culture. The Heights is just a few miles away from Bushnell Theater, Infinity Hall, Mark Twain House, Wadsworth, And the destination shopping areas of West Hartford, such as Blueback Square, LaSalle Road, even the West Farms Mall is just down the road on New Britain Avenue, right? World-class restaurants. For more information about Avery Heights, give them a call, 860-953-1201. You know what I love about it is that there’s no pressure. They don’t whip contracts under your nose. In fact, it’s the furthest thing from their mind. They just want to give you a tour. They know it’s a process. It takes time. Call this number. I’m going to say it again slowly. Write it down. Call them like Monday, 860-953-1201 or online at averyheights.org. For Shavana Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening to… Listen, this is so important. It’s so important that you understand that you do have options when it comes to paying for all of this. And if you like this show, and all others like it, all they got to do is head online. Yes. It’s your podcast. AveryHeights.org. AveryHeights.org. Yep. All right. Have a good one, everybody. So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Financial Planning, Long-Term Care Insurance, Medicaid, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living, Veteran Benefits --- ### [How to Pay for Your Next Chapter – Senior Living: Part #1](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/how-to-pay-for-your-next-chapter-senior-living-part-1/) **Published:** April 20, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Ben Rao author of Paying for Long-Term Care and Co-Founder of Mom’s House gives important information and resources. [www.payingforlongtermcare.com](http://www.payingforlongtermcare.com/) [www.momshouse.com](http://www.momshouse.com/) ### Episode Transcripts+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning, everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located in the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Folks, it is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. And this show will discuss exciting opportunities, important resources for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health, and so much more, along with senior living specialist, Siobhan Mattingly. I tease her because she wears many a hat. Speaker 2 It’s a tongue twister. Speaker 1 It is a tongue twister. It’s like Sally sells seashells, right? By the seashore. Speaker 1 By the seashore. That’s right. How are you? Speaker 1 I’m very good. You look great. How was your week? Speaker 1 It was awesome. You’re always busy. And you know what? Speaker 1 When you love what you do as much as you do, and I, for that matter, we’re very blessed to be able to do that. How many times do you talk to somebody who are miserable in their job? It’s so hard. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 They don’t feel like they’re… We actually talked about this a little bit last week, I think. You don’t feel like they’re contributing to successes or the benefit of… Speaker 2 That’s the worst feeling. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah, sure. Speaker 2 You just feel like, what’s the point? Speaker 1 And I know, I don’t know if I ever told you this. I mean, I actually knew somebody that left not just a high-paying job, a ridiculously high-paying job. And the reason why they did that is because of illness. Speaker 1 I mean, high blood pressure, stress, and took a job for less than half. Of course, if you knew what they were getting, an exorbitant amount. Less than half. Speaker 1 I mean, they went from around $200,000 a year to about $75,000. Speaker 2 Yeah. I can see that, though. And much happier, by the way. Speaker 2 I think that’s worth it. I mean, it depends on what you have going on. A lot of times if you’ve got your kids and stuff like that, you can’t make that move. Speaker 2 But if you can make the move, if you don’t have all that responsibility, if you can downsize, it’s worth it to be happy. What’s the point of being miserable? You just nailed it. Speaker 1 Yeah. She goes, Gary, I know everybody thinks I’m crazy. How do you leave a $200,000 a year job for less than half? Speaker 1 She goes, but I am, can’t you tell? I am much more happy. I am, you know, and she goes, I love what I do. Speaker 1 You know, I didn’t love what I did there. The money was keeping me there. And it was, I should probably should have left this job a couple of years ago because of the high stress and everything. Speaker 1 But I love what I do. Because you retire. Speaker 2 You hear these stories all the time when people retire and they have a heart attack. I remember this one guy that called, his sister called into the community. He retired within a week, and then he fell down the stairs, ended up with a traumatic brain injury. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. Are you serious? Right after retirement? Speaker 2 Yep. Week after retirement. Speaker 1 It’s like hearing about the person who hits the lottery and kicks the bucket a week later. Speaker 2 It’s horrible. Good Lord. So life is too short. Be happy. Speaker 1 You have a guest with us this morning. Speaker 2 I do. And on the phone from Louisville, Kentucky. Yes. Speaker 2 Tell us who our guest is. I have Mr. Ben Rao on the line. He’s written a wonderful book called Paying for Long-Term Care. Speaker 2 He’s also the co-founder of Mom’s House, and we do a lot of work with Mom’s House, and he’s going to explain what that’s all about. He is actually kicking off our four-part series on paying for long-term care. So we have him this week. Speaker 2 Next week we have Second Act is going to be here, and they’re going to talk about bridge loans. Show number three is Family Solutions for Care, which is going to talk about long-term care. And show number four is actually going to talk about veterans’ benefits, Patriot Angels. And I know that Ben kind of works with all those companies. And that’s actually how I got connected with all those companies, which is great. But he’s actually going to be speaking Speaker 1 next Saturday at an open house. Last week, you spoke about that. Yes, on May 6th. Speaker 2 We’re very excited to have him. We’re going to see him in person all the way from Louisville, Kentucky. By the way, my family’s from Lebanon, Kentucky. So you can wave and say hi to them Speaker 1 for me, Ben. But please welcome Ben. He’s awesome. Ben, welcome to the show. Speaker 3 Hey, thanks, guys. I’m glad to be on it. And thank you for having me. I am in Louisville doing a little business development here for Mom’s House, but excited to talk about paying for long-term care and trying to get this information to as Speaker 1 many people’s hands as possible. That’s great. Tell us just a little bit about yourself before I start getting into the book and some other questions that I have for you. Speaker 3 Yeah, so I’ve been a long-time entrepreneur, haven’t worked for the man for probably 20 years, And just I build businesses and marketing and senior living and group purchasing organizations. And I’ve been a longtime real estate investor. I love investing in houses and buying houses and rentals. So I’ve been doing that for a long time and really enjoy it. Speaker 1 It’s great. This book, Paying for Long-Term Care, The Essential Guide to Understanding and Funding Senior Care. Why write this book? What was the story behind it in you becoming a senior care advocate? Speaker 3 You know what? That’s a really good question because if you ever received a text message from me, you know I can’t type. So for me to be out writing a book was pretty incredible. Speaker 3 But it was really – I got into senior living really excited four years ago. And I saw there was just, I couldn’t believe the gaps in information that was available for families that have a loved one that’s thinking about transitioning into some level of care or into independent living. And the conversations just weren’t happening. Speaker 3 And it dawned on me that six or seven years earlier than that, my stepfather, Tom, who got sick really quick and was almost bed bound at home. Nobody wants to leave their forever home. But I didn’t know what to do. Speaker 3 And so I had gone through all these different things and made all the mistakes about what do you do when a loved one needs to look at care? Where do I go? What does it mean? Speaker 3 You know, Tom served in the military. Does he get veterans benefits? What do we do about the house? Speaker 3 Just all these things. I don’t know what level of care. And I just said, you know what? Speaker 3 Like any entrepreneur, I’m just going to go solve it. And so we set out to go write this book just to be able to get a resource in the hands of family, give them a framework, and just get some conversations going with the families. I think that’s really the biggest thing is how do we get families talking about this? Speaker 3 Nobody wants to talk about when they’re leaving a forever home and going into some other – Speaker 1 Well, it’s a tough conversation to have. Speaker 3 It’s tough, but it doesn’t have to be that tough. I mean, it’s really – you’re really exchanging housing for housing. So, I mean, it’s something that if we can get people just having this conversation while everybody’s head is in the right place and it’s not under duress or stress or an emergency, it makes it so much easier for families to plan and how they’re going to pay for care and what the loved one’s best wishes are. Speaker 3 Because sometimes this stuff happens really quick. Maybe it’s an accident. Maybe somebody fell. Speaker 3 Something’s happened again. And it’s like, Mom can’t go home. She’s got to go into some higher level of care. Speaker 3 And now the family’s under duress trying to make really big life decisions. And they haven’t talked about anything. Speaker 1 Well, I mean, it’s swapping house for house in a literal sense. But there’s an emotional aspect to this as well. And, you know, there’s memories that are that took place within those four walls. Speaker 1 You know, the first child you raised, the first meal as a husband and wife. And also, you know, even by memory, I mean, if you have to use the restroom at two o’clock in the morning and you know how to get from your bedroom to the bathroom in the complete dark because you know where it is. Even if your memory is not good, when you do something every day for 40 years, it almost becomes… Speaker 1 Right, exactly. So there’s multiple reasons. It’s not, yeah, I guess in simple terms, it’s swapping house for house. Speaker 1 But it’s not just that term that should be looked at. There’s an attachment. Speaker 3 We talk in terms, it’s like a lifetime of memories. I mean, the Salt and Pepper Shaker collection that mom and dad collected, because every time they went on a trip, they got a new one. And now mom can’t necessarily take 12 boxes that are in the basement of Salt and Pepper Shaker. Speaker 2 Or the piano. It’s always the piano. Speaker 1 It’s memory, right? No, right. You know, I was looking at your book, and the first content section of your book is called Making Decisions on Your Own Terms. Speaker 1 I mean, this is a great statement, but I wanted to get from you. Like, what do you mean from this? Why is this important? Speaker 1 And really, how can this book help aid in making this all happen? Speaker 3 Yeah, I think that, you know, in some ways we’re in denial that, you know, there’s always tomorrow. We’re never going to get older. And then you get into an uncomfortable conversation that the family doesn’t want to have, and so they put it off. Speaker 3 I mean, who wants to go to their parent and say, let’s talk about what the next stage of care might need to be so we know what you want? It doesn’t sound like a very fun conversation, and people are uncomfortable because they don’t know how to approach it. You know, some people are planners, right? Speaker 3 Some people aren’t. And so if we can stimulate these conversations earlier while the individual still is, you know, there and it doesn’t have to be in a hurry and you can have these conversations, you know, my stepfather, Tom, he was a really strange and funny man. You know, he didn’t trust banks, but he did store, you know, $100 bills wrapped up in foil in the freezer, which I found by accident. Speaker 2 And where did he live? Exact address, please. Speaker 1 I actually understood where he was coming from. Not many people trust banks right now. The part I don’t understand is what’s with the freezer, you know? Speaker 3 You know, it’s where he was going to hide his money. And I didn’t know that’s where he hid his money. Or if I had found it by accident, I might not have known where it’s like, okay, somebody might hire somebody to come clean out the fridge and clean the house out. Speaker 3 Clean him out. They throw away $10,000. So it’s like having these – I created this roadmap or framework for families to use to make it easier to have the conversation. Speaker 3 And it sounds super simple, but it really is – I just wanted to get people tracked so they kind of had an idea about like – and you start out kind of like what – you’re trying to figure out. Everybody wants to go straight to the end as far as what do we do, where are we moving. but these conversations could be happening years in advance talking about what assets does mom and dad have. Speaker 3 This could be a simple spreadsheet, a piece of paper, a Google Doc, whatever it is, to just start talking about. Let’s identify what mom has. Oh, Tom’s got $10,000 in the refrigerator. Speaker 3 Check. Got it. Make sure we check the fridge. Speaker 3 Oh, life insurance policy. I had no idea you had one. Stocks. Speaker 3 I had no idea. He had like $12,000 in stocks. I had no clue. Speaker 3 paper was in file cabinets in the basement it got wet without having an idea where everything is and that’s just one of those steps as far as defining and identifying what all the assets are so you’re not scrambling and not having that conversation as you guys know a lot of these family members we call our daughter Judy that adult child lives out of town they don’t live in the same city which makes it even harder I was going back and forth every weekend from Kansas City to Louisville to come in to Louisville to figure out what I was going to do Speaker 1 and how I was going to help Tom. Let’s jump ahead a little bit to chapter seven, the cost of long-term care. Ben, what is the average cost looking like right now for care? I know you’re in Kentucky and Speaker 3 Connecticut is a little different than Kentucky, but… You guys are crazy up in Connecticut. Speaker 1 Yeah, you listen, you’re preaching to the choir here. Speaker 3 I think where you don’t want to be is you don’t want to be in Alaska. Speaker 1 Why is that? Speaker 3 Well, you know, hundreds of thousands of dollars a year for care. Speaker 1 Let’s not even get into skilled nursing. Speaker 3 It’s even more. Speaker 1 So we had a bad year. Speaker 3 It really depends. Speaker 1 What was that? I’m sorry. Speaker 3 I’m sorry. I thought I lost you. No. It really depends on where you are. You know, you made a really great point there, Gary. If you’re in New York City in Manhattan, super expensive. Speaker 1 Oh, very expensive. Speaker 3 Very different. The Northeast, more expensive. But compare that to Indiana or the Midwest or some of the areas. Speaker 3 So right now, it’s really depending on the level of care and what you need. It could be $1,500 to $3,000 a month, kind of at an entry-level point, which might still shock some people. But most of the time, you’re looking for, if we’re talking about assisted living, you It could be in that $3,000 to $6,000 range, depending on where you are. Speaker 3 There’s some high-end care communities that are way, way in the stratosphere as far as what those monthlies are, but they’re providing so much more value in different things and amenities to their residents. So it really depends on level of care, where you are in the United States, and it’s going to range anywhere from a few thousand dollars to $20,000 a month. Speaker 1 So I guess the inevitable next question or the logical next question would be, what are some of the ways to defray the cost or maybe help pay for this care? Speaker 3 You know what? Speaker 1 I should write a book on that. You know, I’ll tell you, I’ve got a good title for it if you ever do. Okay, all right. It would be called maybe paying for long-term care. We could start with that. Speaker 3 I’m making a note. Speaking of which. So, I mean, there’s a lot of different ways. Speaker 3 I think the family starts to start to figure out, like, how are we going to pay for this? They don’t realize that how much it’s going to cost. And depending on the family situation, depending if they were a veteran, depending on that they had pension savings, what their wealth is, it’s really all over the place. Speaker 3 But there’s a lot of different ways to pay for care. You know, everybody thinks, not everybody, but a lot of people think that, you know, They say things like, oh, isn’t Medicare going to pay for my – and it’s not. And Medicaid might pay for some of that more skilled nursing. Speaker 3 Some of the assisted living take some of that, too, depending on the level of care that they have. But we’re looking at the big places are savings. If they were a planner and they got a long-term care insurance policy – I know you talked about having family solutions for care. Speaker 3 I know those folks very well. do a great job on how to unpack and figure out how to get the most out of your long-term care policy. Those are really the planners. You know, my mom was in senior living for her entire life. She was a planner. She’s got a great policy. I’m like, go mom. Yes, $12,000 a month. I can’t wait to get you moved into assisted living someday. And she’s going to have to pay, but a lot of people haven’t put that money aside. And so most of their money is wrapped up in their house, in their home. And so So they have to figure out how do we tap that equity in the home to be able to pay for care. Speaker 3 There’s some companies out there that do loans, bridge loans, home equity lines of credit. Those are ways that some people kind of do that. Some people want to start similar to what I did with Tom where, oh, we’re going to put a Band-Aid on it and try with in-home health care because nobody wants to leave their forever home. Speaker 3 And so they start there. You know, there’s companies out there that if you have a life insurance policy and it’s the right kind of policy, you have some opportunities to convert that policy into cash to help pay for care, depending on the type of policy that you have. You know, some people, depending if they’re going to age in place and they’re going to live in their home, a reverse mortgage could be a good fit. Speaker 3 I don’t, you know, I’m not a financial advisor, but I have an opinion that I don’t think it’s a great fit if somebody is going to be moving into a higher level of care. And this is more of a kind of a, hey, let’s keep mom or dad at home for a short period of time and just figure this out. That may not be the good fit. Speaker 3 It just might be expensive money to borrow against equity in the home. So there’s a lot of different health savings accounts. That’s one that’s kind of like people don’t, you know, if you’re putting money in the health savings account, that can pay for care. Speaker 3 So there’s a lot of different ways to get out there and pay for care. But what we’re seeing is that many times the house is the family’s biggest asset unless they’ve got a lot of money put aside. And as they trade that house for new housing plus care, that’s really the move. Speaker 1 I’d be afraid I outlive the money from my house. We’re going to sell this house or we’re going to take a reverse mortgage or we’re going to just put the house on the market and we’re going to put that money in. That’s going to be your senior living. Speaker 1 Let’s say that’s great. I don’t know if it’s $5,000 a month times 12 months times 10 years. That money is gone. Speaker 1 My luck is, I guess it’s a good problem to have, I suppose. The quality of life has to be factored in there as well. But then what happens if my money is all gone, but I’m still living, you know? Speaker 3 I know. It’s a problem. And, you know, we talk about, you know, sometimes there’s a negative connotation, but we talk about the silver tsunami and the baby boomers that are coming at our care system. Speaker 3 And we are going to have a problem. There is going to be, you know, we need a bigger boat. boat. I heard somebody say that’s like, hey, somehow we need a bigger boat. We’ve got to figure out how to age in place. And if we’re going to age in place, then we’re talking about modifying our existing home. Again, it’s back to the home. And if you’re in Gary good enough shape and you’re going to live 10 years, it may be surprising me that you’re moving out of your house that early, unless you’re moving into independent living. And that independent living is much more of that planning and it’s more of that apartment. Speaker 1 Memory care could really occur, God forbid, at any age. I mean, we’re looking at Bruce Willis. We’re looking at, you know, just Robin Williams several years ago. Speaker 1 Folks, you’re listening to Your Next Chapter, Senior Living. It’s a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Our guest this morning is the author of a book entitled Paying for Long-Term Care, Ben Rayo, who’s going to be over at the heights of, oh my goodness, it’s coming up. The date is May 6th. Yeah, May 6th. Speaker 1 Next weekend. Next week, that’s right. So I guess my next question is, I guess, how should someone get started trying to figure all this out and how they’re going to be paying for this, any kind of care plan for the future. Speaker 3 Well, the earlier, Gary, we can have these conversations, the earlier we can start the plan. Speaker 1 True. Speaker 3 You know, we’re living, if you’ve seen the, I’m sure you’ve seen the graphics that were the, it was the pyramid and the life expectancy, you know, pyramid is now changing to a column, you know, with healthier eating, technology, more exercise, people are living a lot longer, which means we’re going to need more. I don’t know how old you are, Gary, but I remember when I was a kid seeing people get balloons that 40 was over the hill. You know, they had those black balloons and they had a 40 and it said over the hill. And it’s like now, you know, 55, it doesn’t even seem to be over the hill. Speaker 2 Thank you. Looking nifty at 50. Let’s get bumper stickers. Speaker 1 That’s true. Yeah, yeah. Speaker 3 My mom’s very active. She’s in her mid-70s. My father’s extremely active, and he’s in his mid-70s. Mid-70s used to be what seemed old 30 or 40 years ago. And this is just a better level of care. And I think COVID showed us something, too, that people want to be around people. Socialization. Speaker 1 Well, we missed it. Speaker 3 We’ve got to start these conversations early with the family. They need to be happening. People plan for, they’ll take weeks or months to plan for a family vacation to go to the beach, but we can’t sit down and have a few hours of conversation about, hey, God forbid, if anything happens, mom, dad, let’s talk about what you really want. Speaker 1 All right, so Ben, what if a person is in, sadly, if they’re in an emergency situation, What advice can you give to them to get organized and pay for, you know, the long care that’s needed? Speaker 3 Yeah, so the advice, if you’re an emergency, you know, take a deep breath. It is stressful. We’re trying to keep a loved one safe. Speaker 3 And there’s a lot of great, great care communities out there that have great services that can help you kind of navigate and figure that out. There’s people that are out there, elder law attorneys that can help get things straightened out for you and get things organized as far as power of attorney and those kinds of things. As far as paying for care, that kind of becomes depending on, you know, you’ve got private pay and then you’ve got care communities that accept Medicaid. Speaker 3 And so just depending on what level of care you need, you might, you have to spend all your money down before the government is going to help you to pay for care. So that’s one of the things that is a little bit scary. I’m going to rely on the government and be relying on it for the rest of your life. Speaker 3 If you’re younger right now, one advice I could give you is get that house into a trust, and an LL attorney can help you to do that. And if it gets in there and gets seasoned for a period of time, then that will be considered an asset, and that will help your family have a little bit more on the inheritance side versus spending every dime of a family member down. Speaker 1 That’s good. Go ahead. I’m sorry. Speaker 3 No, no, no. Go ahead. Speaker 1 Just because I’m running out of time, there’s a couple of things I wanted to bring up, and I know that this is rather important to you professionally as well as personally. What would be one thing that you could help a listener with right now who’s just perhaps beginning this process? I don’t have much time left, and I know that probably requires a lot of thought here, but what’s the first thing that comes to mind that you can help somebody with who’s just starting this process right now? Speaker 3 If you’ve got time and you’ve got a runway here and it’s not urgent, have the conversation with your loved one. It’s the best thing that you can do for yourself, and you can take it from an approach of, Hey, Mom, Dad, I want to talk to you about this. And I want to talk to you about this not because I’m worried about it. Speaker 3 It’s a morbid conversation or it’s a bad conversation. I have it because I don’t want to get to a point that something happens and we need to move quickly to get you to care to keep you safe. And I don’t know what you want. Speaker 3 And I don’t want you to feel like guilty or stressed because you’re putting all this burden on me as your child. Let’s have that conversation. you know I heard somebody say something it’s like they they use the book as the platform to say let’s talk about it well you said earlier the better we need to talk about it mom dad then said we need to talk about it so let’s talk about it well I like what you said a little while ago I mean earlier Speaker 1 the better don’t do it at a time when you you’ve got to start making decisions you know in the next few weeks or a couple few months have it well enough in advance where they’re they’re making these decisions of sound mind um and rational speaking of that book um i know you’re gonna are you me giving it away i know you’re gonna be over at the heights on may 6th for their open house um but you’re are you are people gonna get a copy of this book yes look at that i think i think i Speaker 3 think they are gonna get a copy of the book if we can if we run and if we run out of copies we’ll give people a link to where they can get a digital download um if you want to get it at the book you I always go to Amazon. It was an Amazon bestselling book. And just look up page for long-term care with my name, Ben, and last name is Rayo, R-A-O. Speaker 2 But he’s got to autograph these. Speaker 1 Oh, look at that. Well, Stephen King’s got nothing on him. Siobhan, how does somebody sign up for this? Speaker 2 You can give me a call at 860-953-1201, and I will register you. I’m looking forward to it. Or you can go to AveryHeights.org. It’s actually on our website as well. You can click the link and get in touch with me that way as well. Speaker 1 If you don’t mind me asking, Ben, just how long did it take you to write this book? It’s pretty thorough. Speaker 3 So I had a lot of help. Again, grammar and typos are right up my alley. So I had multiple people read it. I really built out a framework. But I think from start to finish, it probably took eight months. Speaker 1 Yeah, it’s very thorough. I want to congratulate you on the book. And anybody listening to this, well, you’re going to get your free copy. I didn’t do it alone. No, I’m sure. Speaker 3 I mean, there’s a lot of people that I admire in senior living that I asked if they would look at the manuscript and give me feedback, and they did. Speaker 1 Well, you can pay for the book on Amazon or on the website, or you can get your free copy of the book, Paying for Long-Term Care. All you have to do is attend one of the open house events that Avery Heights is happening. May 6th, you’ll get the tour, a lunch, and a presentation from Ben Rayo himself. Speaker 1 Ben Rayo, mom’s house, paying for long-term care. And let’s not forget the following week, May 13th, again, tour and lunch and a presentation which is downsizing what you must know before you move. And that’s with Amiston Home Transition Solutions, who we’ve had on the show in the past. Speaker 1 I want to thank our guest this morning, the author of the aforementioned book, Paying for Long-Term Care, The Essential Guide to Understanding and Funding Senior Care, Ben Rayo. I greatly appreciate your value time this morning. Good luck with… Speaker 3 Thank you so much, guys. I appreciate you having me on. And I did neglect to mention one other thing. If you’ve got a loved one that’s moving into care and you need help with the house and want options, MomsHouse.com is a great spot to go to get some options there. Anywhere in the country. Speaker 1 Let’s check it out. MomsHouse.com. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Thank you so much for listening. Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. So long. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Financial Planning, Long-Term Care Insurance, Medicaid, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living, Veteran Benefits --- ### [Living Your Next Chapter - Life On Purpose: Jeffrey Schlichter](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter/) **Published:** December 16, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Today we are starting a new section of our show called **“Living Your Next Chapter – Life on Purpose.** Each month we will have a guest that will tell us how they are still living their purpose or have found their purpose in life as an older adult. Today we welcome our guest Jeffrey Schlichter, Videographer who launched a full-time business, Cameo Video during his retirement years. He’s also had a successful career as an actor, singer, musician, director, set designer, acting coach, and theatrical sound technician. This episode will inspire and motivate! ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good weekend to you, everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights at the Heights of Avery Heights, a one of a kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Now, this show is dedicated to empowering older adults with helpful resources, ideas, inspiration, and tips to encourage them on life’s journey. Our production is also for the younger generation so they can better understand how to develop greater communication and enjoyment for those elders in their community. Now, it’s never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way we think about aging, senior living, and the retirement years. It’s time to celebrate our seniors. Give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, inner peace, and the courage to never give up on growing. So together, we will explore topics such as how to enjoy the retirement years in your life through exploring the world around you. We’ll also discuss travel opportunities, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Hey, Siobhan, how are you this morning? Speaker 2 Wow, that was a lot. Speaker 1 Please take it, I’m out of breath. Speaker 2 That is a lot of information. How’s your week been? It’s good. It was really good. The holidays are amazing. Yeah, we just had our tree lighting at the Avery Heights. Had 75 people there. It was really nice. Whoa. People from the cottages or the houses, as you like to. Speaker 1 Let’s call it what it is. These are houses with flower beds, gardens, driveways. This is a little cottage. A little cottage is like a little hut that you see. lake somewhere. Speaker 2 These are homes. It was amazing. We had families there, kids running around. We had carolers, all sorts of food. You know Tim. He had huge shrimp. He had crab rangoons, empanadas. It was crazy. And then we had a full happy hour, full bar as well. Speaker 1 That does sound like a lot. Speaker 2 It was an occasion. And then we lit the tree. It was a huge tree in the lobby. Speaker 1 Why shouldn’t you? All communities Speaker 2 have a nice tree. Speaker 1 Are people are they in the festive spirit of the season right now? Yeah. Or does it take a little easing into that? Speaker 2 I think that did it. I think that kind of launched everyone. Yeah. And then we also were collecting for toys for tots as well. So we have a huge bin of toys overflowing in the lobby, which is nice. So I think that puts people on the move. And, of course, we have our Hanukkah celebration going on as well, starting on Sunday. Tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow. Yes, yes. So it’s going to be good. Speaker 1 Yeah, that’s great. Speaker 2 It’ll start. It’ll be the first candle lighting. And then we have several kind of guest, I guess, rabbis coming in to help us celebrate that. So we’re excited. Speaker 1 Do you find that people are at Avery Heights during the holiday or are they with family or friends off the ground? Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s a combination. It’s actually really funny. I think when folks first get there, they’re kind of like, you know, they keep going in and out with their family. But a lot of times now they’re like, no, I can’t. I got plans. They want the family to come to them. So the day after Thanksgiving, like a month ago, it was incredible. I mean, I was there on Friday and people were playing the piano. They were singing. There was family everywhere because we have hospitality suites as well. And so it was really cool. We had a bunch of little babies there and kids running up and down the hall. Speaker 1 So your residents can invite their family in rather than them. Speaker 2 Which is such a nicer visit rather than staying at a hotel and then having to come to, you know, come to the heights. It’s actually nicer because they can just wake up, go downstairs, have breakfast, have meals, go to various activities. And it’s a nicer visit. And I always recommend it for families rather than staying outside of off the campus. Speaker 1 Hey, I noticed that you brought a guest in. Speaker 2 I did. I did. This is Jeffrey. He’s actually a videographer. He has a wonderful company called Cameo Video, which he started later on in life. And we’re pretty excited about that because we are actually starting a new section to our show. I figure we’re coming up on a new year, so a new section. It’s going to be called Living Your Next Chapter, Life on Purpose. And so we’re going to be bringing in each month someone who’s wonderful, like Jeffrey, that has started kind of a next chapter and something new in their later years. And then those guests are actually going to be coming to the Heights to talk to our residents to inspire them as well. And we’re super excited. Speaker 1 Well, welcome, Jeffrey. Thank you. Glad to see you. Good to be here. I appreciate it. That’s very nice of you. When did this new chapter of your life begin as a videographer? And really, what was your motivation for it? Speaker 3 Well, a girlfriend introduced me to a wedding photographer in Torrington. And I started doing wedding photography. And I worked for him for eight and a half years. And I kept watching the videographers that were videoing while I was doing photography. And I realized that they were missing a lot of really cool stuff with their angles on the bride weren’t good and all that kind of thing. And from my background as a musician and an actor, I kind of thought that this would be a good way to go. And then I also learned about the whole photography business going digital. And so that launched me into getting my first cameras. And I’ve been doing this as a part-time up until three years ago, 25 years now. Speaker 1 Wow. Would you say that in this era, videography is more popular than still photography? Speaker 3 It’s most important because most still photographers with their cameras now do video as well. Speaker 1 Oh, with the same camera? Speaker 3 Same camera. Speaker 1 So, all right. Wow, I didn’t know that. So they’ve got a camera. and their camera also turns into video. Speaker 3 Yeah. They can make a little switch and take a few pictures. Speaker 1 I’ll be looking at that. Speaker 3 Grab some video. Speaker 1 How long has that been? Speaker 3 That’s been at least 10 years now. Speaker 1 Well, where have I been? I don’t know. You haven’t been in weddings, apparently. Good Lord. Living under a rock. So how did you determine to set up your own videography business? And really, how did your past as an actor influence your artistic work, not only as a photographer, but also as an editor? Speaker 3 Well, I think I was doing a play in California at Downey Civic Light Opera, and they videoed it. And that was the first time that I actually got to see myself perform. And I was able to judge whether or not what I thought I was doing was what I thought I was doing. And that really clicked with me. But that was early on. That was back in the 80s. And so that always kept in my head that that was something that I would want to do. And so what happened was after I worked as a wedding photographer and got my first video cameras, I realized that I had a niche because not only was I an actor and I understood I’m a movie buff and I have a BA in speech emphasis theater. So I learned a lot about a lot of different things. And I really realized that all of the years that I took dance benefited because I could video choreography. And all you have to do is if they’re doing a waltz, you have to count to three. And if they’re doing something else, you have to count to eight. And every eight beats, something changes. And I became this incredible in-demand videographer for doing dance recitals. Speaker 2 What a resume, right? Oh, my goodness. I’m trying to picture him with 80s hair. Are you not doing that? I still have it. I’m thinking like Wham or one of those people. I’m like, what kind of hair did he have? Speaker 1 I’m lucky I still have mine. I was going to say, yeah, I feel the same way. So I guess it’s common, right, where a lot of actors make the switch to the other side of the camera. I mean, it’s happening more often now than I think ever. I mean, I think what they realize is as they – they’re not the marquee name anymore. It’s like anything else. It’s cyclical. A new generation of younger actors come on and they’re the – Clint Eastwood. Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson. Right. Mel Gibson. Do you prefer one more than the other? Speaker 3 That was a – Speaker 2 I know, right? You stumped him. Speaker 3 Well, I haven’t performed on stage in about 13 years. Wow. But I was working full time with a security company and managing a warehouse. And on the weekends, I was doing video for different companies like Hartford Stage and Warner Theater and Hart School of Dance. Speaker 1 So do you know Frank Tavera and Paul Marty and some of these people from Hartford Stage and the Bushnell? No. Speaker 3 No, but I do video at the Bushnell too. Speaker 1 Very nice. What was your primary focus though as a video producer? And really how did your work influence actors and even dancers that saw their performances in the, let’s say, like in the theatrical archives? Speaker 3 Well, I think the most important thing is as an actor, sometimes you’re able to picture what you’re looking like while you’re performing. So you get this idea that you can see yourself on stage. And I learned that in college, that I could actually see in my mind what I looked like. And it wasn’t until I started seeing myself in video and realizing how important that was to dancers. Because I can shoot at 60 frames per second. And so dancers can, if there’s like 30 people on stage, they can all see every single movement. And they can tell whether they’re in time with each other. And so it’s really important to nutmeg ballet because they really want to have a lot of their students go on to be professional dancers. And it’s really important for them to see how precise they need to be. Speaker 2 It’s almost like sports. You know, like you videotape yourself so you can see what you’re doing wrong and look at the replay tapes. And they do. They do. Speaker 1 On Wednesdays, it’s film day. If you played on a Sunday, let’s say you played Sunday afternoon or Sunday night, you have Monday and Tuesday off. Wednesday, it’s all film. Makes sense, yeah. Yeah. Well, that’s how you learn, right? Yeah, exactly. Are you your worst critic? Like, do you say, oh, see, I missed my marker. I could have done that better. I know I’m my own worst enemy when it comes to radio. Yeah, of course. Speaker 3 That’s a given. Yeah, you’ve got to be critical. Speaker 1 Tell us a little bit about your past here in Connecticut. You were a star football athlete, right? Your college experience. And this guy did it all. Our resumes are nothing. Really? You did acting. You’re a football athlete. Wow. Time spent in California performing as not only an actor but a musician as well. Speaker 3 Yeah, after I graduated from college. Well, what do you want to know? All of it. All of it. Simsbury High School went undefeated in 1966, and I was one of the five seniors that was on the team, never left the field, offensive guard, defensive end. And all five of us got scholarships to college out in the Midwest, and we got to pick whichever college we wanted to go to. So I was not a great student, so I picked a junior college. And that was the best thing I could have done because the junior college was easier than Simsbury High School. Cool figure. And so while I was there, I started pursuing acting seriously. And although I was a major in, I majored in art and music. And then when I transferred to Kansas State Teachers College, which is now Emporia State University, I switched my major to theater. But they didn’t have a theater degree, so I had to get a BA in speech emphasis theater. So I learned about debate. I had to build sets. I took lighting classes, you name it. And the music department wanted to turn me into an opera singer, but I didn’t want to deal with foreign languages. So I just – Speaker 2 Do you have that kind of voice? Speaker 3 Oh, yeah. Speaker 2 Operatic? Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, I have a stage voice. Speaker 2 Oh, okay. Speaker 3 So I can give you an example. Speaker 1 Were you ever in anything that maybe we have seen? Speaker 3 I was in a movie with Jean-Claude Van Damme, and I don’t even remember the name of the movie, but I spent my whole day in a cell, and it was 110 degrees with a great big huge spotlight. And some of the dust caught on fire, and so they had to close the place down. And it was really – it was very interesting because John Malkovich who – yes, he was playing the bad guy and that started his whole career of doing bad guys and he was the nicest person. Totally all the way back. Yes. He was the nicest person and just so great with everybody and I just was very impressed with him. Speaker 1 I had a little role in the movie. Speaker 3 And? Speaker 1 It was – yes. It was, what the heck’s his name? Who was the guy that was married to Billy Bob Thornton? Speaker 2 Oh, Angelina Jolie. Speaker 1 Yes, he was married to, in fact, they were still, they were married. She was down there, but not in the movie. Speaker 2 You met Angelina Jolie? Speaker 1 No. Speaker 2 Okay. Speaker 1 No. Billy Bob Thornton, Patricia Arquette. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 And a guy named Steven Weber, who I didn’t know who he is. Do you know who he is? No. He was on a TV show called Wings. Oh, yeah. About an airport, like in Nantucket or something. Speaker 2 Yes, yes, yes, yes. he was probably one of the brothers Speaker 1 yes yes I think he was Speaker 2 I used to love that show Speaker 1 I didn’t even know much about it until after I had already like researched it and then I’m like oh I’ve got to watch this show it was we did this in the French Quarter down in New Orleans oh wow oh wow wow it was pretty cool yeah well I don’t have the credentials you have I mean I’m not you know I’m not the cinematographer the dancer the musician well you want to hear Speaker 3 an interesting story I in college I got in a movie called Bad Company Jeff Bridges. And people, I was just an extra. And they filmed this great scene where it was the longest running continuous scene ever done at that time. And I sang in bars to make extra money while I was in college. And so while I was on the set, people heard that I was Jeff. And so people kept coming up to me thinking I was Jeff Bridges. And so I didn’t want to disappoint them. So I signed Jeff Bridges. Speaker 2 Oh, my goodness. You don’t. Speaker 3 And so later on during the run, they were there for several months in Kansas shooting this movie. Jeff came in with two girlfriends, people that knew me from theater. And they saw me up on the stage performing and singing. And they let go of Jeff Bridges’ arms and they come running up. Jeff, how are you doing? We haven’t seen you. Speaker 1 That is funny. Speaker 3 His face just dropped down, and it was so funny, and I’ve followed him. I’ve been really impressed with him. He’s one of my favorite people, too. He’s amazing. Yes. Speaker 2 He was an Iron Man. Speaker 3 Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 And his dad, Lloyd Bridges. Yes. Yeah. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 Right. Whole family, actually. Yeah. Bo Bridges. Bo Bridges. His brother. Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I just, when you said the longest continuous scene, I just think of Orson Welles with Citizen Kane. If you remember the opening scene. Yeah. Through the window. Speaker 2 Oh, wow. Speaker 1 I don’t know if you remember what I’m, you know. Or, oh, another Orson Welles movie, Touch of Evil. There’s one continuous, it’s actually in the beginning of the movie, or The Birdcage with Robin Williams. I’m a little bit of a football fan myself. That’s great. Speaker 2 I like that. Speaker 1 What do you think your favorite moments, though, on stage as a performer, and really what highlights as a videographer stand out in your mind from behind the scenes? Speaker 3 my favorite moment on stage yeah okay favorite like okay that that definitely had to be um i i performed um in oliver uh it was um done in 1968 i think uh right before the movie came out and i got to play the part of fagan and this was with simsbury summer theater for youth and this was in our third year and um 60 must have been 69 so um so i got to audition for fagin out at downey civic light opera in in in la and um and it was being directed by um two women that were disney at disney people uh who had never directed a play before and they were all all they knew it was TV. And so they cast me and they kept saying, okay, we’re not sure how to do this number called pick a pocket or two. And they said, could you like stage this for us? And I said, sure, I’d be happy to. And so that happens to be one of my best moments because I got to work with all the kids. I got to tell them what to do and how to pick my pockets and all this kind of stuff. And that was one of my special, most special moments. Speaker 1 Wow. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights. You can find them online at averyheights.org, right? Yes. Yep. Just out of curiosity, how did you get so involved with set design? Like building sets and directing shows and even sound engineering. Speaker 3 Well, that happened when I moved back here. I mean, I was a professional musician all during the 70s. And just I got to be – my band got to be the warm-up act for a gentleman by the name of Lou Rawls. Oh, you’ll never find. And that was his. Speaker 1 Lady love. Oh, yeah. Remember those songs? I know I can’t sing. I can barely speak, but I know the songs. I mean, Lou Rose, remember he used to do all his work for sickle cell disease? The guy was huge. I do. Yeah. I remember. You’re surprised I know this stuff. Speaker 2 It was the singing that threw me. I was going to join in. Another love like mine. That’s right. Someone who cares. My bearish owner. The way that I do. Well, I’ll start singing. Speaker 3 So I love telling this story because the managers, my act was Jeff and Penny. And we started off as a duo. She was the first female conga player in L.A. And I bought her her first conga drums and she took to it and loved it. And it just clicked for us. Speaker 2 What kind of music did you do? Speaker 3 Pop, whatever was popular. Speaker 2 Okay. Speaker 3 You know, whatever pop. We did everything, you know. But I grew up in Philadelphia, so I had a different, you know, I had that background. And so John and Philip Miles managed us for about two years, and they’re the ones that got us the gig being the opening act for Lou Rawls. And, of course, I had an all-white band doing rhythm and blues and Quincy Jones and all that kind of stuff, and it was an all-black audience. And we did not get a sound check because the Kansas City Symphony was not up to par for the conductor for Lou Rawls. And so they rehearsed all the way through to our opening. We walked out on stage. We could not hear our instruments. We could not hear our vocals. And we were being booed by the audience. Oh, wow. And finally, by the second song, we started to hear everything. And on the third song, it was my solo, and I had to take off my guitar and sing this song, Everything Must Change. And all of a sudden, these black ladies in the audience shelled it out, sing it, white boy, sing it, white boy. And Lou Ross is sitting up in a balcony seat off to my left and with a big smile on his face because we turned the whole thing around. And at the end, after we walked backstage, Lou Ross was coming down the stairs and he waved me over and he said, Jeff, I only have one thing to tell you. And he said, watch how I hold my mic. And I’m going, watch? So Penny and I go out to the back of the theater and we watched him. and realized that what he had given me was his essence of what made him so popular on stage. He held the mic right under his chin, never took it away from his face. You never took your eyes off his face the whole time he was performing unless he wanted you to. And I thought that was such a nice compliment if that was something he shared with me about my performance. Anyway. Speaker 2 I want to get to be a celebrity where I can just say simple stuff like that and it means something. Right. You know, like, chew all your food. You know, and someone years later is telling that story on the radio. Siobhan said, chew my food. And I was like, oh, my gosh. Speaker 1 And now that’s your line. You’re going to become known for that. Speaker 2 Chew your food. Speaker 1 Chew your food. And floss. Speaker 2 And floss. Speaker 1 Spokesperson for the American Dental Association over here. How would you best characterize the rewards of your work in theater? Might as well include photography in that as well and serving on the various boards that you have throughout your senior years. Speaker 3 Well, I got asked to be on the board of Theater Guild of Simsbury because of my technical background. And most people aren’t even aware of my acting background because that was all done either in California or up at the Warner Theater in Torrington where I’ve gotten to do Fagan. I’ve gotten to do Fagan and Bill Sykes on stage. So I think that’s pretty unusual to be able to do both of those. And so I think the thing that I love the most is when people see my video and they compliment me on my video and they say how important it is to further their careers. That’s become more important to me than anything. My set design for Simsbury Summer Theater, I did set design, sound, then lighting. And I taught the kids how to run the sound boards. And I taught them how to focus the lights and, you know, that kind of thing. Speaker 2 That’s awesome. Speaker 1 Yeah. Then let me take that one step further. Is there any advice that, you know, maybe to our listeners about how to stay inspired and how to avoid becoming a couch potato, so to speak? I mean, you found so much purpose in your life that, you know, but do you think that you could maybe give others a little roadmap, if you will, on how they can find their bliss in life? Speaker 3 Well, I think the interesting thing, when I retired from lab security, a very good friend of mine also retired from the Canton High School. And he was the drummer for a group called Tire Biter. Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Speaker 3 Which have been around for – Speaker 1 I know some members of the Tire Biter. Speaker 3 Yes. So Tom Moran was called Styx. He was the drummer. He’s also a very good guitar player. We both retired at the same time and we said, gee, do you want to sing together? And I said, yeah, that sounds really good. So we sang together right up until COVID and then took a break. And then this year we started up again. And so we get together once a week and we perform every now and then. We do the open mics in Simsbury and in Collinsville. Speaker 2 So cool, right? Yeah, it is. And so that’s been really good. Speaker 3 And having somebody that’s interested in something you do is very important. And I think I’m always looking at other opportunities and things that I wanted to do. And one of those things was I wanted to see if I could write a play. And so I wrote a play about my dad and his years of doing Meals on Wheels. And when I got back from California, he said, I got to bring you with me to see what I do and meet the people that I deliver meals on wheels to. And so I went around with him. And there must have been about eight ladies that absolutely, absolutely loved. Speaker 1 Jeff, you have lived and continue to live a fascinating life. Yeah, definitely. And it’s been a pleasure of getting to know you. Mine too. Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. Those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, to memory care, a whole lot more as well. Please visit AveryHeights.org or call 860-953-1201. That’s 860-953-1201. to learn more about their special brand of community unlike any other in Connecticut. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. 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She talks about Ageism and how her company is creating… **Categories:** Purpose, Inspiration & Positive Aging **Tags:** Purpose & Meaning --- ### [Searching for Senior Living – Don’t Go it Alone.](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/searching-for-senior-living-dont-go-it-alone/) **Published:** December 15, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When searching for a senior living community, older adults and their families are often taken advantage of. Listen and get tips to help protect you from being taken ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good morning and welcome to this edition of your next chapter senior living. Now this show will provide helpful tips and resources that will empower and encourage you each week presenting important topics and resources guiding you through your next chapter. Avery Heights is a 43-acre senior living community with full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and more, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, how are you this week? Speaker 2 I’m very good. Speaker 1 How was your week, by the way? Speaker 2 It was awesome. It was awesome. Speaker 1 You always have awesome weeks. I know. I’m so jealous. Speaker 2 I know. Speaker 1 Where’d you go this time? I didn’t go anywhere. Speaker 2 Actually, my son’s getting married, actually. at the end of all, well, it’s so weird because it’s COVID. So he actually is already married. And actually, I have my first grandson. But they’re doing a wedding celebration. Thank you. Wedding celebration next month in August at the end of the month. And so my daughter is in the wedding. And so we went and picked out her bridesmaid’s dress. Speaker 1 And here in Connecticut? Speaker 2 Well, they’re getting married Newburyport in Mass. That’s where his grandfather was from. So they’re getting married up there. But David’s Bridal is here. Oh, now I’m doing a plug video. Speaker 1 That’s all right. that’s right but nonetheless so you you are quite the busy gal i am yeah i got four kids four kids Speaker 2 yeah are they all three adults three adults no two of them are have boyfriend girlfriend kind of thing my my son is married and then i have my 13 year old who is not married well i’d hope Speaker 1 back in the day you know yeah some countries maybe exactly but she’s not no no no she will Speaker 2 be married till she’s in her 50s she’s got plenty of time agreement well out of 50s though huh Speaker 1 but then you can’t have kids at that point in time she could and 50s it’s an agreement who just had a baby um oh my goodness who was it she’s like 60 oh oh i don’t know daryl hannah really no way yes wow she is married to um neil young oh must be a cute baby wow but 60 years old i thought i read that wrong. I’m like, I actually want to know what I did. I thought it was a typo. I really did. So I went online and I Googled her and I brought her Wikipedia page up. No, no! She’s 60! Speaker 2 Yeah, I’m sure she would be 60. That makes sense. I guess, yeah, right. Because she was way back in the day. She did Splash! Speaker 1 She’s in all these other movies, but yet Speaker 2 that’s what everybody remembers. That’s the movie, yeah. Speaker 1 That’s true. That was like early 80s, so that was Speaker 2 like 40 years. And I don’t think she’s done a lot since that I’ve seen. I mean, she did other movies back then. She did one with Steve Martin, the Cyrano one. Oh, Speaker 1 Roxanne! Yes. That was Speaker 2 funny. That was very funny. We had the Speaker 1 long, yes, the Cyrano. Yeah, he’s still Speaker 2 doing stuff, but I haven’t seen her around in a while. But that’s neat. I guess when you’re Speaker 1 married to Neil Young, you just go out on tour. Speaker 2 That’s wild. She’s married to Neil Young. I know. Speaker 1 She used to date Jackson Brown for all like 10 years and they never got married. I know. Wow. How are things going over at Avery Heights? Speaker 2 Very good. So we’re about to start our veterans program. Oh. Yes. So we actually have a Vet2Vet cafe where all of our veterans will get together. They’ll have coffee and donuts and chit-chat, which is awesome. And then we’re going to be doing a veterans wall unveiling in November, which we’re very excited about. Speaker 1 You’re killing me. Yeah. Really. This is one really. You don’t just talk the talk. You walk the walk. Speaker 2 We have to, yeah. Speaker 1 You say you’re active over there. This is a very active scene of living. Speaker 2 And it’s important for a community that’s been around for 60 years. I think you’d have to have a veterans program. And we’re excited to launch it. We’re excited to bring all of our veterans together because we have cottagers. We have independent and assisted living. And we’re going to bring them all together. And when you get veterans in a room together, it’s just something magical about it. I love the stories. Love the stories. We had one guy. He was a spy, actually, for Germany. And I probably shouldn’t be saying that over the air, but he was. Speaker 1 Back in the day, it makes no difference now. Speaker 2 And he told us these stories about how they sent a signal and the signal was so loud. They did it on purpose. Once they found out he was a spy and he was listening, they sent a signal. And unfortunately, it messed up his hearing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, those are stories. I mean, you know, they talk about, you know, people that were on submarines and flying and all sorts of areas. And I love the stories that the veterans tell. I love it. So, yeah, it’s amazing. Speaker 1 What’s the youngest person you have there? How old is the oldest person? Speaker 2 So we have centurions. So we have people that are over 100. Speaker 1 Really? Speaker 2 Yeah. Nowadays, that’s like nothing. I mean, there are people who are like 109, 107, and that’s nothing nowadays. And some of these people that are in their hundreds are just walking around like you and me, you know, doing their thing. Yeah. You know, yeah, there’s something to be said for it. And then we have younger. I think I don’t actually know our youngest, but I’m thinking probably like in their 50s if I had to eyeball. Speaker 1 Like me. Speaker 2 I know. We could be members of the senior centers. That’s what kills me. I was doing a tour of a senior center. She says, oh, yeah, once you’re 55, you can become a member. And I’m like, my eyes are like, what? Yeah, we could be a member of the senior center. I don’t think of myself. I know. I know. Yeah, we could be members of the senior center, which would be kind of cool if you think about it. They’ve got exercise. They’ve got music. They’ve got walking. They’ve got – Speaker 1 So my mom and my dad would have to come visit me at the senior center. Speaker 2 At the senior center. But they have good food. I mean, actually, I told my husband, mate, why don’t we become members of the senior center? Speaker 1 Well, I may just pop in just to take advantage of that brunch you were talking about last week. Are you kidding me? That’s better than some restaurants that I’ve heard. Speaker 2 Exactly. See that? Speaker 1 So as we have heard, individuals and companies, they take advantage of older adults financially and physically. Now, an example is the horrible stories about an elderly person who sends their money overseas to help some supposed person in need. We’ve all heard these scams. It’s really sad, particularly when you’re wiping out some poor innocents, their life savings, what little they have. Most seniors are on fixed incomes anyways, and they live on tight budgets. What might not be as known is that older adults and their families can be taken advantage of when searching for a senior living community. So I don’t know how this happens when they’re just in the privacy of their own home and they’re just doing a search. Or maybe they just maybe this. I don’t know. They walk into a couple of different facilities. I don’t know. But let me ask you to start with this, Siobhan, because when I hear about this, this is just sickening. Look, I don’t like to see anybody taken advantage of. I don’t care how old you are or whatnot. But I kind of think when you start messing with seniors, like children. Children and older adults. Yeah, they should be off limits here, folks. Because it’s just sad. My heart, it really, it aches when I hear that. Yeah, definitely. How can a person be taken advantage of in the industry, though? Speaker 2 Well, they can be taken advantage of medically as well as financially. So obviously financially they can get themselves in a situation at a senior living community and they can’t afford it. You know, sometimes, you know, you sit down with, you know, some of the sales folks and they’re sitting there and they go, oh, yeah, it’s such and such a month. But here’s what you can do and da-da-da. Or they might tell you about programs. I was actually the conservative for my mom. And the place where I went, they told me about programs that were available. Well, come to find out, my mom didn’t qualify for those programs until years after. So I actually, you know, had to put in money for her. Yeah, but she was already there. And once they’re already there, what are you going to do? So I think that’s how financially and then medically. A lot of times people can do – we’re supposed to do an assessment of the person, especially if they’re going into assisted living, and determine what’s their care plan. Well, a lot of times places will take you in and they’ll give you a care plan and say this is what it is. And then once you get there, which is kind of understandable because once you get there, yes, the care could increase but not increase to the part where you’re having like a 24-hour aid in the room. And what’s the point of being in the senior living community if you also have a 24-hour aid in the room? And so that’s what they call kind of the bait and switch. They kind of get you in. Oh, no, she won’t need that. This is how much the care is. Then they get you in, and then the care spikes up immediately. And, you know, some communities, they’re not like that. They definitely are careful with their care plans. You know, I know for our community, our nurse will sometimes bring a person in at a higher level of care just to be safe and then bring them down. It’s better to go to come in high and then come down rather than – and it can – they could be on the higher level for a day or two days. And then you bring them down as opposed to bring you in at a lower level and then pump it back up. Because obviously if you’re doing your due diligence, you’re coming up with a budget. You’re coming up with a plan. And it can really mess people up. We have – I don’t know in the past couple months that I’ve been with this community, I’ve definitely had the phone calls where people are like, oh my gosh. Now they’re, you know, saying she needs this or he needs this. And they come to our community and, you know, again, they’re happy because the assessment is done thoroughly and we make sure we don’t do that. And other communities do that as well. They make sure they do a thorough assessment before the person comes in. And so, you know, one of the ways that you can help yourself out with that is if you get that care plan, you take a look at it. You could bring it back to their doctor to take a look at it, have a professional take a look at it, just to make sure that that makes sense. Because sometimes we’re like, oh, you know, we know they need a higher level of care, but they come in on this lower level and we’re like, oh, it won’t cost me that much. But you know in your heart that doesn’t seem right. And you don’t want that whole bait and switch. You don’t want to have your loved one all moved in, in the apartment, all set up. And then what are you going to do? Now you’re stuck. And you’ve signed a lease. Now you’re stuck. And that’s how people take advantage. And a lot of times that’s just because of the pressure. You know, a lot of places, you know, you’re very census driven. You know, get people in, get people in, get people in. You have that pressure. And so you do whatever you need to do to do that. And as consumers and older adults and adult children, we just have to protect ourselves. Speaker 1 What can you do if you end up in one of those situations? Speaker 2 Well, you can definitely get an attorney. Don’t feel like you’re stuck. You can get an attorney. You can get some of these senior living advisors can help you out, help you kind of negotiate a geriatric care manager. You know, bring in – even folks at the senior center sometimes have like advocates and helpers that can come in and get a professional to come in and negotiate for you and speak for this. And then when you go out looking for a new senior living community, just be careful. You know, tell them what happened to you. Tell them what’s going on so that you can get back into a better situation. And sometimes that other new senior living community that you’re looking at, they can help you as well. So don’t feel like you’re trapped. It’s over. Don’t just sit there and like I did because I, you know, I didn’t I wasn’t in the industry back then and I was just using credit cards and everything I could to dole out the money. Speaker 1 There’s got to be like a team of professionals that can help prevent these things from happening. And more importantly, how? How can they help? Yeah. And what what in their specific role? How can they help? Speaker 2 So when you’re looking to come, you know, senior living is where you’re headed for. Definitely make sure you have an elder law attorney involved. They can help you, first of all, put all that paperwork together, power of attorney, you know, any type of living will or will period, any of that information. Start there. Get that all in order and make sure – and then use them to have them review the lease. Have them review any paperwork that you’re signing. Have them look at everything. Anytime you feel that in your gut you’re a little nervous, don’t rush. Go back to that other law attorney. A financial planner. A lot of times there’s – it could be if you’re the adult child, that parent or yourself, if you’re looking for yourself, you’ve got funds just kind of out there and you’re like bring that all together and a financial planner can come up with that 10-year or five-year plan for you and help you out. And they might have referrals for you too for senior living communities, which is great. Speaker 1 Does insurance cover it at all or – Speaker 2 No, if you have long-term care insurance. So long-term care insurance definitely covers it and you have to have – it depends. Some of them have various different things where you have to have what you call ADLs, activities of daily living, meaning that you need help showering with meals or with housekeeping. But some of them also have kind of an independent living component in there as well. And there’s definitely funds for one of the folks on the list is the geriatric care manager. There are funds for that as well, which you can get involved. So a lot of times there is a long-term care policy. And sometimes people – ask your parents if they have one because sometimes they have it and they’ve been paying it and they forgot they have it because it’s not automatic. But they could have it. And sometimes now life insurance policies and long-term care policies are together. And so that life insurance policy could have a little long-term care addendum or rider in there, which could help with the cost as well. Definitely a doctor or the PCP, especially if there’s memory care or anything medical involved. get them involved in it. They can also help talk to your parents about actually making the move. Senior Living Advisor, we talked about that. They actually will go out and help you look for places. They get paid based on if you move in. So they’re not, you know, it’s great. So you don’t actually have to pay them. And they kind of know the ins and outs of all these senior living communities. They kind of know the underbelly that you might not know, which is great. Your veteran service officers, again, that’s another free service that every town has a veteran service officer. And they might have certain communities that kind of cater to or have extra benefits for veterans. So they might know that. Any professional contacts. Like I actually how I found the senior living community for my mom was that I was at an event and they said, oh, you should go there. You know, so, you know, a professional contact is always good, too. And talk to people. Talk to people and tell them. Because, you know, adult children are all going through this. So they might say, hey, oh, you should go here. You should go there. I got a call earlier where the gentleman wants to move from the community where he is to our community. He says, oh, he goes, just so happens my neighbor’s best friend mentioned you. So always talk to your family and friends and your professional contacts because they might have a good resource for you. So these are all, you know, again, don’t go it alone. These are all people that are there to help you. Some of them free. Some of them, they cost a little bit. But it’s better to spend that money now rather than spend it later and really get into trouble. Speaker 1 That’s a good point. But since you brought it up, I mean, some of these professionals can cost some bucks. I mean, what do you say to folks that are fearful of running out of funds and don’t want to invest in these services? Speaker 2 Again, everyone a lot of times is willing to negotiate. And so it’s a really, really good idea to just say, hey, we need some help. What kind of packages do you have? But it’s better to go for it with the professionals. I myself, again, I was conservative for my mom. I didn’t have any of these professionals involved. And I got into trouble. I personally got in trouble financially. My mom necessarily wasn’t in the right place. And it was a lot. It was very stressful emotionally and on every level. And just recently, I was able to rectify all the financial nonsense that I got into because I didn’t have these advisors. So, yes, they do cost each one a little bit of money depending on what you go for with them. but it’s worth it. It’s worth that little bit of funds up front because trust me, on the other side, you can really get into trouble. Speaker 1 I’m just going to repeat something that you have said a number of times, not just today, but in previous weeks. Your due diligence. Yes. Research, make sure everything is just not only on the up and up, but is really what you’re looking for and you can’t make impulsive decisions or emotional decisions for that matter. It really takes time to do. And listen, when you visit a few different places and you get a sample of what life is like on the campus, to use the word that you Speaker 2 used. I love that word, actually. Speaker 1 Yeah, but it actually is when you think about it. It’s so associated with college, and I think last week you brought that up as well, but no, there’s a campus. Yeah. Cigna Insurance Company. They’re not a senior living facility or a college right around the corner from WDRC here. Yeah. They use that word all the time. We have one right here on the campus. It’s just so affiliated. It just everybody talks about the colleges. But you have to do your due diligence. Is online, is that a friend or a foe when looking for any online, any senior living facility? Speaker 2 Yeah, it depends. So in one way, it’s your friend because you’re going to go online and look at a senior living community, research it, take a look at it. It’s a foe in the sense that you’ve got to be careful of where you’re looking. A lot of times you’ll put in maybe a certain senior living community and then all these other websites come up. And then you’re paying money to wherever these places are that you don’t need to pay money to. And so you just really have to be careful. Pay attention to does it say like for Avery Heights and say AveryHeights.org or does it say, you know, looking for senior living Avery Heights slash Avery Heights? Because that’s not us. That’s something else. And they’re probably, oh, we only charge $1,000 to – yeah, yeah. Just be careful, especially veterans. Be careful because there’s a lot of programs, a lot of funds that are available and stuff that can be filled out at no charge, forms and so forth, that a lot of times families will pay $1,000 or $2,000 for stuff. And I feel bad because by the time they get to me, they’ve already paid it. And then they’re looking at me and I’m like, oh, this is the company we use. And I’m like, you didn’t need to. So just be careful of what you’re looking and put that credit card away before you pay attention. Speaker 1 Great advice. Speaker 2 You just start putting because you’re desperate. You’re scared. Don’t be pressured. That’s another thing, too. There’s so many people out there that will pressure you. Everybody will pressure you to sign stuff and do stuff and scare you to death. Take a step back. Don’t be afraid. That’s how you know whether it separates the professional companies from the amateurs. Speaker 1 I mean, you’ve been around your experience. There’s no pressure. In fact, that can be a turnoff, if anything. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. It’s you can contact them, by the way, at 866-537-1444. At the conclusion of this morning’s show, I’ll make sure I repeat that phone number with Siobhan. Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. What are some tips? And you’ve given a few already. Just maybe some more tips maybe to help prevent from being taken advantage of. We started talking about that. And I’m just – I mean it always seems like the scam artist or the person who’s trying to take advantage of you or your elder family member, they’re always one or two steps ahead of everybody. And then once we catch up, well, they’re one or two steps ahead of that now. It goes on. Yeah. Speaker 2 I think the biggest thing is, again, that fear. I always – I think if there’s anything medical involved, something really harsh like COPD, CHF, dementia, Alzheimer’s, try if you can to get a geriatric care manager involved. Because they’re going to be an advocate for you. Because inevitably, if you have one of those medical challenges, you’re going to end up in and out of the hospital probably, in rehabs. I’ve seen so many people where a person is just laying in the bed. The rehab is not doing what they need to do. The hospital is not doing what they need to do. Even Sister Living’s aren’t doing what they need to do. So get a geriatric care manager because they’re going to keep an eye on things. They’re going to speak for your loved one. They’re going to speak for you. And a lot of times it’s a nurse and they kind of know how to speak medically. And so it’s important. Elder law attorney, get that attorney involved. Like I said, I can’t stress that enough. You want to have all that paperwork in order because the last thing you want if your loved one is compromised and they don’t have a power of attorney. Because if they don’t have a power of attorney, now you’re in court and you’re trying to get them conserved and that takes time. So if they’re in the hospital or they’re in the rehab, they’re going to be hanging out in that rehab or they’re at hospital until you get this paperwork. And it’s a lot. It’s a lot. It’s a long process and that’s – it’s the last thing that you want. There’s someone that also – another good tip is there’s some type of organizer that you can get, especially if it’s for your parents. And if this is the older adults, if you’re listening, put this together for your kids. It’s – you just get an organizer and you just put – this is my bank information. This is the insurance information. This is the house information. Put all that like in an accordion kind of divide or something real simple. And then you put all that information, all the passcodes, whatever it is, give it to your child. You can find those online sometimes, those organizers. That is the best thing that you can do. Speaker 1 I know exactly what you’re talking about. Again, I said this a moment ago. It just pains me to know that a real vulnerable portion of our population, perhaps the most vulnerable, just get taken advantage of. It’s sick. Speaker 2 It’s very sad, actually. Speaker 1 How do you know if you are working with a good senior living community? Speaker 2 It’s all about that pressure. Again, someone who’s like pushing, pushing, pushing, someone who’s not really showing you what you need. You know, they’re showing you what they’re trying to get you into. You know, again, that consultative approach, you know, someone who’s just kind of like just letting you take your time and letting you look and answering all your questions. And, you know, I don’t know what it is nowadays and don’t get me on my customer service page. But, you know, people need to be respectful. That’s like a big thing. Like customer service nowadays, when you go to a store, what drives me crazy, you go to a store and rather than I say thank you and they say you’re welcome. No, it’s a mutual thing. You say thank you. I’ve given you business. You’ve given me a product. And so if someone’s disrespectful, condescending, making you uncomfortable about your questions or rude in any way, get out of there. Even if it’s the most beautiful place you’ve ever seen in your world, leave because it’s just not a good – that’s what you’re going to get. If that’s what they are, that’s what’s coming at you in the end. And probably the other professionals are going to be just as rude and just as disrespectful, especially if they’re disrespectful to your loved one or as an older adult, if they’re disrespectful to you. That is the last thing that you deserve. You’ve lived your life. Your parents have lived their life. They deserve that respect. And so that’s really how you know if that person is not being off-putting. Speaker 1 Kindness doesn’t cost you anything, does it? No. And good customer – quality customer service. It’s almost like a rarity nowadays. Oh, my gosh. I don’t think people, it’s sad because I actually had this conversation we’re having now, a little bit of it. I actually had not that long ago with a friend of mine. I was just getting gas of all things. And I found myself saying, you know, 40 on pump, whatever it was. Thanks. No. You should be thinking. I’m patronizing. I’m the customer. I’ve chosen your business, not going up the street. And I actually said something to the person. This is so silly of me. I don’t know why I’m taking them. I said something to the person and she looked at me like I had two heads. Like, huh? Speaker 2 I always say the person that’s holding the checkbook, that’s the person that you need to have the respect for and the kindness for. That’s the person who deserves the customer service. We all are reversed in that role. Like in my role, if someone comes in for a tour, I’m the person that needs to be giving the customer service. But when I go to the store, it’s not like I’m not going to get it back. You know what I mean? You hope. Exactly. But in situations, you need to give that – the person holding that right in that check, it amazes me. You know, my insurance, we’re about to change our insurance because the customer service and they’re questioning, you know, where are you going? I wouldn’t even be looking someplace else if I was getting the – sometimes you’ll pay more money for the customer service. You know? Speaker 1 Ain’t that the truth. Speaker 2 Customer service is the key, man. Speaker 1 Who do you call then to report these types of fraudulent situations? Speaker 2 Well, there’s something called an ombudsman. Oh, yeah. And if you go online, you look that person up. That’s who you want to call. And they’ll come out. They’ll investigate it. You can call the attorney general. But definitely if something’s going on, make those phone calls. Because even if your situation, there’s nothing can be done, quote, unquote, there’s always something for the next person. And we have to make people aware. If people are doing fraudulent things, we have to make people aware so that they don’t walk into that same situation. I always talk about human beings and what is it? Pay it forward. We have to protect each other. And so if you’ve been through something, make those phone calls. Make them aware. Even to help the place, wherever the senior living community or whoever, it helps them too because it helps them do a better job. Maybe they’re not even aware that their marketing person is rude or their nurse is rude or whoever. Maybe they’re not aware of it. A lot of times people aren’t aware. And so it’s important like you did. You made that person aware that they looked at you like you were crazy. Speaker 1 Yeah, they did. I go, why am I thinking you should be thinking me? But we’re talking about a gas station attendants. Like, I don’t care. Speaker 2 Yeah, but everything you do. Speaker 1 No, you’re right. But. Speaker 2 Yeah. What’s that? What’s the warrior? I can’t think of it. Speaker 1 The Warrior. Speaker 2 Peaceful Warrior. That movie. You got to see that movie with Nick Nolte. Amazing movie. And one of the things he is actually works at a gas station. And the guy who he’s trying to do his, you know, he’s like this, you know, guru kind of thing. And the guy goes, oh, you just work in a gas station. And he goes, the greatest job you can do is a service job. And so that’s why at my end of my emails, I always put or when I’m talking to someone, I always kind of do a little bow. But it’s real. It’s like, thank you for letting me be of service. Speaker 1 She’s the one that says, I just work here. I don’t care. You could go up the street. Every little thing. We’re all part of the tapestry. You’re absolutely right. Speaker 2 We’re all part of the tapestry. And so her little bit is part of that tapestry. Speaker 1 Could you call the Department of Consumer Protection as well? Yes. Yes. Good idea. Yes. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. I would think so. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, look, the more fraud that we can eliminate. Speaker 2 But do something proactive, too. You know, don’t don’t. We’re talking about writing reviews earlier. Don’t at another show. Don’t be just writing, you know, a rude review. Do something that’s proactive, you know, something that is going to actually, you know, going to something’s going to happen. You know, make that phone call. Just, you know, I’m right. I’m right with you. Yeah. Speaker 1 The bottom line is just to make sure you report it. Yes. Because it really gives the whole industry a black eye. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 That’s the only exposure that someone has. Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh. Speaker 1 They’re all like that. Remember that time we went out? They’re all like that. That’s not true. Speaker 2 It’s not true. And then you end up with those people that are on those tours where they’re just bitter because of the experience that they had. And it takes time to bring them back around. It’s true. Yeah. Speaker 1 Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. For more information on today’s topic, which is don’t go it alone, please call 866-537-1444. Let me repeat that number for you. 866-537-1444. And the first three callers will get a special lunch and tour at Avery Heights. So let me repeat that number for you one more time. Now you’re listening more intently here, right? Okay, 866-537-1444. Siobhan, time just flew right by, as it always does. I look forward to next week. For Siobhan Mattingly, I am Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. So long. 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It can not only help combat loneliness and isolation but also save money. The Heights at Avery Heights introduces their new advantageous assisted living program The 200’s. Companion living and so much more. ### + Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to you, everybody. Welcome to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights, a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots ever in the state of Connecticut. It is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Speaker 1 Your next chapter delves deep into topics that will improve the way that we think about aging, senior living, and the retirement years. It’s actually a time to celebrate our seniors, give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, inner peace, and the courage to never give up on growing. We’re going to discuss exciting opportunities, important resource for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Good morning, Siobhan. Nice to see you. Hello. Hello. Good morning. Good top of Good day to you. Speaker 1 Would you like tea and crumpets this early? Speaker 2 I would. Speaker 1 Yes, me too. I would. How have you been? Speaker 2 Very good. Speaker 1 Nice to see you. How was your week? Speaker 2 My week was phenomenal. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. Good stuff. Speaker 2 Good stuff. Really? Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. We’re excited at the heights at Avery Heights. Speaker 1 As you should be. Speaker 2 Very busy. We got a lot going on. A lot of great residents coming in. Speaker 2 That’s great. Yeah. I like to hear that. Speaker 2 Yep. We just did a veterans reception a couple weeks ago. It was phenomenal for our new recipient. Speaker 2 We honored for our Veterans Wall. Bi-monthly we’ll be doing that, putting a new person up on our wall, and it was wonderful. Speaker 1 I’ve seen the wall. Speaker 2 His associates came from his law firm. Oh, wow. And, yeah, they were all dressed up in their suits, and he just was – and everyone came over. Speaker 2 All the veterans came over and shook his hand, and it was wonderful. And, of course, his wife cried, and it was nice. It was very nice. Speaker 1 You know, here we are – well, this is kind of a weird thing because it’s not typical. Here we are in the middle of winter, right? I mean, it doesn’t feel like winter. Speaker 1 It doesn’t seem, doesn’t even look like winter. Nonetheless, what’s different about winter at Avery Heights as opposed to, you know, because there’s like summer activities. People can be outdoors. Speaker 1 It can be coming and going. Usually wintertime it’s associated with, and I don’t care how old you are, people hibernate a lot in the winter. You know, they don’t go out and see much, you know, until the spring or not even early spring. Speaker 1 What festivities or what ongoings do you have in the winter months? Speaker 2 Yeah, I think what’s different and what’s nice about and really where a senior living community shines is really in the colder months. Because like we were talking about on a previous show, you could just walk out your door of your apartment and have activity as opposed to having to get in the car. Especially a few weeks ago, a couple weeks ago, it was freezing out, right? Speaker 2 It was cold. Who wants to go out in that? Well, you don’t have to. Speaker 2 We actually had a concert that weekend that folks went to, I think, at Weaver High School. And so the van pulls up to the door, picked people up, and took them to the concert. Now think about it. Speaker 2 If you were home by yourself as an older adult, no way you’re going to want to start the car, warm it up. Speaker 1 No, you wouldn’t even go. Speaker 2 You don’t have to worry about that. And the van is handicap accessible. So if you’re in a wheelchair or a walker, it has like an elevator where it can just bring you right on to the van. Speaker 2 So I think that activity-wise, we have a lot of music coming in. We have, you know, exercise-wise, we have a full wellness center. We have a pool. Speaker 2 We use the Wii machine, you know, to get people to exercise as well. So I think that that’s where a senior living community shines is in these colder months. Because even medical transportation, you know, getting out to the doctor. Speaker 2 I mean, who wants, again, warm up the car, blah, blah, blah, blah. They just get on the van, go to their doctor’s appointment, come back, have some lunch, and enjoy themselves. So I think it helps with the socialization a lot and really preventing that isolation. Speaker 2 because in the winter when you’re at home, even myself, I mean, as a, you know, almost older, older adult, it’s like, I don’t even want to, you know, my son was like, uh, hibernated with my grandson kind of hunkered down and hibernated the weekend when it was cold. He says, we’re not going anywhere. And he’s in his thirties. Speaker 2 And I’m like, you’re not going anywhere. I mean, you’re young and spry. What do you mean? Speaker 2 Yeah. But they didn’t even want to go out. So imagine if you’re older and you can feel that cold, you know, you know, and to that Speaker 1 point, there are people of all ages who get seasonal depression. Speaker 2 Yes. You know? Yeah. Speaker 1 Although this year, like I said, this has been a really unique winter thus far. It’s still cloudy, though. The cloudiness. Yeah, I know. That brings us down. Speaker 2 I mean, you look outside and it’s just bleh. Speaker 1 But when a senior has seasonal depression, particularly a senior who is still residing maybe at home alone, that’s different because you get a husband and wife or a family of three or four or whatever, and there’s other people that kind of lift your spirits. oh, come on, let’s put a movie in. Or we were talking last week about music therapy and how it triggers happy moments, for the most part, you hope. But when a senior lives alone at home and it gets darker early or it’s colder, it’s inclement weather, and it’s just a person home with their thoughts, It can be not only disturbing but downright sad. Speaker 2 Yeah, it is. And the decline. I mean it’s so neat to see people come to the community and just come to life. Speaker 2 And especially when they make friends, like a really like a best buddy. There’s this couple of ladies in our community. I absolutely love them. Speaker 2 They even started to dress alike. It’s hysterical. But it’s so sweet. Speaker 2 I mean they do everything together. They go get the mail together. They go to meals together. Speaker 2 They work out at the gym together. But they’re always out and about buzzing around. And they go to the hairdresser together. Speaker 2 But it’s nice because, you know, they’re buddies. They’re friends. And it’s really neat. Speaker 2 And it’s funny. They both use, one of them uses a walker or a wheelchair. But it’s neat, like, when they kind of choose almost like an accessory, which one they’re going to use. Speaker 2 It’s kind of wild. But it’s really neat to have them in the community. And it’s encouraging. Speaker 2 I love seeing those types of friendships blossom. Speaker 1 Companionship. Do you think it adds to the longevity of life as opposed to a person who has just left? in solitude, alone with their thoughts and loneliness. It definitely does. Speaker 2 And I think that’s across the board, like you were saying before. I mean, we see it like, for example, in recovery world. Like they’re always talking about don’t isolate because when we’re left to ourselves, we kind of get into trouble. Speaker 2 You know what I mean? And so for older adults, they get into trouble in a different way. You know, that’s some of the stuff we’re going to talk about today. Speaker 2 So you think about what happened during COVID. I mean, we saw it. We saw during COVID and I was, and back then I was in hospice. Speaker 2 And so really that first part, you know, the first beginning of COVID, obviously we saw an uptick in cases because people were unfortunately passing away. But then that year or two after, it was even worse that we had people with dementia that were coming from home that were incredibly declined. And people were like, I can’t believe how fast they declined. Speaker 2 Also like chronic diseases, you know, COPD, CHF, cancer even. Like you see these diseases where people didn’t even know they had cancer. I had this one, oh my gosh, it was horrible, this one couple, and she fell on the ice. Speaker 2 And he took her to the doctor, found out she had cancer, and she passed away within a month. And he had to call, and he loved his wife. And I know that sounds crazy, but he loved her. Speaker 2 And just he said, you know what, Siobhan, the worst part of it, I just don’t have enough time to process. It’s not like we knew she had it for a while. And she didn’t know because she wasn’t going to the doctor because I think older adults had that fear of going to the doctor. Speaker 2 They were doing the telehealth, which we all did the best we could during that time. I’m not criticizing anything that was done, but we see what isolation does and lack of socialization does to people. Speaker 1 Why do you think it’s important that maybe a person even has a roommate, let’s say, to help pass the time when it’s not 12 noon in the day room or lunch. But even somebody to, you know, read with or even if you’re reading separate books, but you’ve got, you know, hey, you know what? Let me grab. Speaker 1 You want something to drink? I’m going to the refrigerator, to the kitchen. Or just someone to talk to you. Speaker 2 Yeah. There’s so many advantages. And that’s why, Bill, you know, our director and I, we came up with kind of a cool program. Speaker 2 It’s called The 200s at the Heights. This is a program we have and it’s limited. So we only have six companion suites that we have that are available. Speaker 2 And we’re really excited about it. We’ve already started to take applications on it. And the reason why we developed this program for many different reasons, and one of them is exactly like you said, so that the people can have companionship, so they can have a roommate. Speaker 2 First of all, a really silly one. It’s fun, right? I mean, you remember back in college and I have a roommate. Speaker 1 I went home at college. I didn’t live on campus. Speaker 2 But I had roommates. And actually, even as I was older, unfortunately, you know, got divorced, became a single mom. I had another friend of mine, single mom. Speaker 2 She came to live with me. And we were laughing about just how ridiculous we were. I mean, she’s from a different culture. Speaker 2 And I remember coming home one day and she has my son, who was six, cooking pancakes for her son, who was three. And it was a snow day. So we were babysitting two other kids and she’s upstairs sleeping. Speaker 2 And I came in the house, a different culture. You know, it’s a different culture. So when kids are young, they have more independence. Speaker 2 I came home. My son is on a stool in front of the gas stove. The kids were all, everything was fine. Speaker 2 Let me just say this. Everything was fine. They were eating their pancakes. Pancakes were delicious. He wasn’t burning them. He’s an awesome cook now. So she sparked something. But we were just laughing about my face. And when I went into her room, I’m like, dude, what is going on downstairs? But again, I mean, we have those memories. And now she’s about to get her master’s degree. She just got her degree in social work and to just see her flourish to who she is. Speaker 2 So having a roommate, you have memories, you have fun, you know, and even when silly things happen and you support each other. You do. Her and I have supported each other. Speaker 2 And in a senior living community, it helps. It’s like instant socialization. It’s instant lack of isolation. Speaker 2 And especially during this world, unfortunately, where there’s COVID out there, you know, any senior living community, you know, you could probably go across Connecticut and call us and say, hey, have you had COVID in the building this winter? And we all have. Right. Speaker 2 So we’ve got to go down to that what we call semi-shutdown now. It’s not crazy like it used to be, but you do have to do some sense of a shutdown. And now you have a roommate. Speaker 2 Now you have someone you can be shut down with. You can kind of communicate with and have fun with and complain about the fact that you’re shut down. I mean, it’s good. Speaker 1 I hope you don’t mind this next question, but I have to ask because since we’re talking about roommates. Speaker 2 Oh, my goodness. Speaker 1 Well, does it defray the cost? Is it cost effective? Speaker 2 It’s very cost effective. And I didn’t put that at the top of the list because I think there are other benefits beyond that. But absolutely, definitely. Speaker 2 Assisted living, hey, it’s expensive. I mean, it’s normally private pay. I mean, there’s our veterans benefits, and we’re going to be talking about in a nice series about ways to pay for it. Speaker 2 But at the end of the day, we’ve talked about this. That middle class person like me, like you, it’s going to be tough. Unless you have lots of money or a little bit of money, if you’re in here in the middle, you have to figure out a way to pay for that. Speaker 1 And that’s where most people are. Speaker 2 And that’s where most people are. So this is a great program. And this includes the rent, includes meals, includes housekeeping, and includes care, which is nice. Speaker 2 So like showers, AM care, PM care. It’s going to include, like I said, three meals a day. Also med management. Speaker 2 So different basics that when you first kind of come into the assisted living world you need is part of this package. And that’s what really makes it very cost effective because you don’t have the rent and the care. It includes that. Speaker 2 And so it makes it really nice. Speaker 1 Do you find that roommates look out for each other, that they actually care for one another? Yeah. Speaker 2 And there’s a certain, you know, especially, you know, females, we tend to have the mothering in us. And it’s one of those things. And it’s neat. Speaker 2 And there’s always that one that becomes the mother and one that, you know, becomes the person that’s taken care of. We make healthier choices when we have our roommates. It’s their safety involved. Speaker 2 It’s their safety. Maybe not having your kid cook at six years old pancakes, but it turned out to be a great thing. My son is an awesome cook. Speaker 2 He cooks at Christmas. He cooks at Thanksgiving. So we learn different things. Speaker 2 Like for me, I learned a different culture. Maybe I shouldn’t be babying my son so much. All right. Speaker 1 So let me just ask you then. Tips. What would you – if somebody were to ask you, my goodness, give me some recommendations for a roommate. Speaker 1 You can’t just throw any random person in with somebody and expect miracles. Look, generally speaking, you’ll probably – I don’t want to harp on the negative. I don’t want to harp on mixing two people who just have nothing in common and don’t get along. Speaker 1 Right. But you don’t also – we have to address it because you want to make sure that that doesn’t occur. Speaker 2 Exactly. And so there will be fail-saves for that. We do have our social worker, and she’s always mediating anyway, even with our traditional resident. Speaker 2 So that will be in place. And we’re going to pair people properly. We do it already in many different areas of our community in the dining room. Speaker 2 So we’re going to make sure that, hey, we’re going to look at the profile of that person and say, hey, they would be good roommates together. Speaker 1 Oh, good to hear. That’s what I wanted to hear. Speaker 2 And there are tips just for – and we’ll have like an orientation that will be special for the roommates. It’s not going to be our traditional. So there are different things you can do. Speaker 2 I think that it’s important for the old adult. You have to be flexible. It’s one of those things where especially if you’re used to living alone. Speaker 2 Now you’re living with another person. So you have to be, you have to know exactly like you said, you have to know there’s going to be, you know, some challenges. And so you have to be willing to roll with it and to grow. Speaker 2 I think that’s really important. And then you have to set, you know, early on, we’ll learn about their boundaries. We’ll learn about, you know, we’ll have rules and regulations so that that that helps a lot when you’re not, you know, even being married, you know, you don’t want to infringe on that person’s boundaries. Speaker 2 And so that’s going to be important, too. So there’s going to be, orientation-wise, there’s going to be obviously a different flavor than what we normally do for our normal residents that come in. Speaker 1 You know, I would imagine that the introduction can be exciting, but people speculate. Yeah. You know, it’s like, okay, this person seems nice. Speaker 1 Yes. Doesn’t mean I want to room with them. Yes. Speaker 1 But I’ll give it a shot. And like, is there a ramp up time where You’re still kind of feeling each other out, so to speak? Speaker 2 Well, we’re going to have these people meet ahead of time. So we have our private dining room. So we’ll have them have lunch or breakfast or dinner and spend some time together and chat and really get to know each other before they’re kind of in the roommate situation. Speaker 2 You know, a lot of people are really excited about it. And the way I want to present it, again, that number five is going to be it’s affordable. Because I don’t want people to make the decision just because it’s affordable. Speaker 2 Because then it’s got to be – you have to kind of be welcoming to the other benefits of it, the socialization, the fun, the support, living healthier, just having a friend. And especially with dementia and Alzheimer’s, that isolation is just detrimental. And so if you have a roommate and someone that you can go through that journey with, that’s really nice. Speaker 1 You’re giving me all the answers that I was looking for. You really are. All right. Here’s a scenario though. If – Speaker 2 Do we have time for that? No. Speaker 1 I’m just kidding. Got to do a quick billboard in about two minutes, but it gives you enough time to answer this. What if somebody doesn’t get along? In other words, they’ve given it the good old yeoman’s try of a few weeks, a month maybe even, and it just seems like they’re oil and water. Speaker 2 Yeah. So in that same area of the 200s, we do have one bedrooms as well. And so we’ll have that option to be able to transfer to one bedroom or transfer to a new roommate. Speaker 2 I mean, colleges do it. People do it. Other senior living communities, actually in the Mass area in Massachusetts, they do it. Speaker 2 So obviously there’s going to be people that might not get along. But I think if we do this right, I’ve seen it be very successful. Speaker 1 Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with senior living specialist Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. All right. Speaker 1 So you must have a plethora of success stories and fun stories where you maybe even take some pride in knowing that, hey, it wasn’t for the Heights or even me specifically. Forget about even be friends. They wouldn’t even know each other. Speaker 1 Yes. But truly, this is friendships, relationships. This can occur. Speaker 2 Yes. Yeah. So we had these two ladies actually came in at separate times. Speaker 2 One lived alone. She wanted to be left alone. And she was, you know. Speaker 2 I know her. Yes. She had a lot of layers to her. Speaker 2 And I always say it that way. I think it’s from the blind side. Tim McGraw said, peel back the onion. Speaker 2 You got to peel back the onion. And that’s why I really take that with me. So I see that. Speaker 2 So I see that whole, and I just go, you know what? There’s something underneath there. There’s a soft, gushy side underneath there. Speaker 2 And so I got to know her. And luckily, her apartment was right near my office. So I really got to know her very well. Speaker 2 We got to be friends. And then another lady moved down the hall. Same thing. Speaker 2 It turned out she was actually in the military. So she was no joke. She was like, you know, she was a tough, tough lady. Speaker 2 And I remember the first time, because I would take walks with her, and I remember the first time she says, you know, I’m sorry. I’m a little rough sometimes. She goes, you know, I was in the military. Speaker 2 And she started talking about that’s how she’s used to, like, presenting herself so people would respect her, especially a woman in the military. It’s very challenging. So these two, I like Days of Our Lives. Speaker 2 these two got together and and i was like oh you like days of our lives she likes it i like hey why don’t you come on down let’s let’s watch this together so the three of us are there in their you know little climbers they’re sitting there they’re watching and i’m in my chair we’re all watching days of our lives well then little by little the other lady i’d be busy obviously working Speaker 1 you know um can’t be watching days and days of our lives they were like bow and yeah yes they came Speaker 2 together yeah right they came together and they started being friends and then they started doing all sorts of stuff together they go to music together they go to lunch together and here were these two ladies who, mind you, were still not very nice to many of the other people in the community. But they were nice to me. They loved me. And they were nice to each other. And it was really neat to see, though, them build a friendship. And in a million years, I never would have thought they would come out of their apartments. It was one of those things where you’re like, at least they’re safe. You’re like, well, at least they’re safe. But they became friends. And if you look at Facebook, they’re in most of the pictures at the activities having fun. And so it was nice for them. Speaker 2 And that’s where we always talk about your next chapter. And it was just neat to see them come to life like that. Speaker 1 I like to hear that. As long as you’re nice to Victor Karyakis. Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 That’s all that matters. Speaker 2 And Hope and Bo. Speaker 1 And Hope and Bo. Speaker 2 I think those people are still on there. Actually, Victor, I think, passed away. Just passed away. Speaker 2 Yeah, he passed away. Yeah. But it’s amazing how these characters stay on forever, like Young and the Restless, too. Speaker 2 It’s crazy. With Victor, I can’t believe he’s still on there. The other Victor. Speaker 2 The other Victor. Speaker 1 Victor over there, yeah. I’m surprised he even still shows soap opera. Speaker 2 But you can, I mean, sometimes, you know, if you’re at the doctor, sometimes I’m at the, wherever I am, and it’s happened, Days of Our Lives is on, you can jump right back in and figure out, you can. It’s like, all right. Speaker 1 Not much has happened over the last year. Speaker 2 My sister still watches it. She watches it. Yeah. Speaker 2 We used to watch it when I was younger. And I remember at Central, they used to have, this is back in the day, they used to have rooms for each network. So ABC, NBC, and CBS. Speaker 2 Wow. And the NBC room was, now you see, you had that too. Don’t like I’m that old. Speaker 2 What? Nowadays, you have your iPhone and you can watch things whatever you want. But back then, it was exciting. Speaker 2 One o’clock, we were in that NBC room watching Days of Our Lives. I know. Speaker 1 I’ve got a mechanic. Listen to this. I have a mechanic who takes, and there’s only two guys there. Speaker 1 It’s just two men. And they got a heck of a business. But they take their lunch together every day at the same time. Speaker 2 And what’s Days of Our Lives? Speaker 1 I don’t know if it’s Days of Our Lives. Or Young and the Restless. Whatever it is. But my point is that it’s a soap opera. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 And they’re hooked. These are two grown men, mechanics, manly men, and they got to watch their soap. And I’m not kidding. Speaker 1 Yes. That’s funny. It is. Speaker 1 It is. Speaker 2 That’s fun, though. See, it’s fun. Speaker 1 Living life with a friend is fun. Well, okay. So let’s go there in our remaining few minutes, then. Speaker 1 Are there expectations and responsibilities that each must endure or take on? Or like I’m talking about household, household, apartment, household chores. It depends. Speaker 2 I think it’s going to be like with Avery Heights or the Heights, the way we are is every circumstance is individual. So we’re not there’s no cookie cutter. So we’re going to take those two people and for who they are and see what they want to do. Speaker 2 I think that, you know, there’s going to be the normal type of responsibilities. I mean, dishes have to be washed, different things like that. But a lot of these people will be on assisted living. Speaker 2 So a lot of that stuff, the aid will do, too, will tidy up, which is nice. So that issue probably won’t be a big thing because if there are a bunch of dishes or a refrigerator be cleaned out, our aides will come in and take care of a lot of that. Speaker 1 And the beauty is that if you still want your – Speaker 2 You have your own – You have your whole side. You have your own bedroom. Well, you have your own bedroom. Speaker 2 You have your own closet space and you have your own bathroom. So you don’t have to share any of that. There’s just a common area where there’s the living room and the kitchen area. Speaker 2 So you have your own stuff, which is nice because if they didn’t have their own bathroom, that’s kind of rough. I’m glad you said that. Speaker 1 I didn’t know that. Speaker 2 Yeah. And they’re literally sides. So the middle is the common area and then the sides are kind of their piece of the world. Speaker 1 How popular are these units? Let’s hear a scenario. Somebody comes in and they can either live alone, they can have a roommate. What do people gravitate more towards? Speaker 2 We just kicked this off. But I’m seeing that it’s funny that a lot of people are loving the roommate solution, especially families, because they want their loved one to have a friend. And so families are like, yeah, I keep on saying, well, they can also have a one-bedroom by themselves. Speaker 2 But tell me more about that roommate thing. So I just had a wonderful woman that’s actually going to be hopefully bringing her father from Florida. And she loves the idea because he’s going to be coming from Florida. Speaker 2 So who is he going to know? He lived in this area back in the day, like in the Newington area, but now he doesn’t. And so now he’s going to have like an instant friend, which is nice. Speaker 1 That is nice. Oh, wow. it’s it’s really i’m excited for you what you said you just launched this we just launched it so we Speaker 2 and we have six six only six apartments that we’re doing how long ago just launched it two weeks ago Speaker 1 two weeks ago okay so and and how are uh why six do you anticipate more well it’s the 200s because Speaker 2 it’s in the 200s area so it’s in a certain area we wanted to have it kind of in a certain part of the building that we wanted to try this out okay yeah and then if it works we’ll kind of have well It could be any apartment. Speaker 1 That’s where I was going to go next. I have a feeling. Not only does it work, I think it’ll be in demand. I actually think it’ll be more popular than six units. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we wanted to try it out kind of in a, you know, like a pilot area and then go from there. And I love the name, the 200s, right? It doesn’t sound cool. It sounds like it’s so popular, like Melrose Place, the 200s. Speaker 1 You missed your calling. You know, you could have been in Hollywood as a developer, creative consultant. Speaker 2 We’ll have all sorts of drama over there, too. Billy was it Billy I can’t think of her names Jan I can’t remember their names and Melrose Place I never watched that one you never watched that one who was in that the girl who’s married to the rock star is in that that’s every show yeah no the blonde hair I can’t think of her name what’s her name Speaker 1 no I don’t know was it Mel Speaker 2 Heather Locklear Speaker 1 oh Heather Locklear yeah she’s married to a rock somebody Tommy Lee no no oh Richie is that Aerosmith no Bon Jovi Bon Jovi Well, Richie Sambora, the late guitarist. Yes. But they’re no longer… Speaker 1 Oh, they’re not. Did he die? No, no, no. Oh, he’s not. Speaker 1 No, no, no. You said the late guitarist. Oh, did I say the late guitarist? You did? Speaker 1 Oh, I’m sorry. No, no, no. He’s not with the band anymore, though. Speaker 2 Oh, oh, okay. Speaker 1 I hope. Maybe one day he’ll rejoin. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. But they’re not together? I didn’t know that. Speaker 1 No. They haven’t been together in a long time. Speaker 2 Oh, wow. And Valerie Bertinelli, she’s with Aerosmith. Is that Aerosmith? Speaker 1 No, she’s with Eddie Van Halen. Speaker 2 somebody’s with someone in Aerosmith Pamela Andrews oh yes Speaker 1 no she was with Tommy Lee Speaker 2 and she’s divorced too right Speaker 1 oh from Kid Rock Speaker 2 and that’s husband number five or six I think she’s been married six times yeah who wanted to know who’s married to Aerosmith I don’t know I thought he was in there somewhere or is that a person that’s a band that’s not a person oh no Steven Tyler okay yes Steven Tyler but I think he’s single is he single I don’t know Speaker 1 I haven’t kept track Speaker 2 I’m not obviously I’m not a rock and rock person but Heather Locklear Speaker 1 yes Speaker 2 hooker oh my gosh that’s like that i think that’s before miller’s place oh this was with with william shatner yes yeah wasn’t she on that show i think so i don’t know okay that’s before my time i was just the wee one just the wee one we go back to the accents just a wee one Speaker 1 you’re too much all right um i i’ve only got i have less than a minute left I left in less than a minute. So call me. Call me. Speaker 1 Okay. Come see what we’re talking about. I was right about to go there. Speaker 1 If someone’s interested in saying, well, you know, I think you’ve piqued my interest. Yeah. Do they have to specifically mention? Speaker 2 No, because really, we’ll explore all options. Yeah. Because you never know which one is going to hit. Speaker 2 Yeah. So I actually tell, I take people on a tour. I show them everything. Speaker 2 And then if this is the way to go, it’s the way to go. All right. Speaker 1 Good stuff this morning. Actually, I had no idea. I’m so glad we talked about this. Speaker 2 There’s always something happening at the Heights. Speaker 1 Right? There you go. That’s the name of the movie. The Heights. Speaker 2 The Heights. Speaker 1 Or the TV show. Speaker 2 And we need a theme song, too. Speaker 1 Oh, we’ll come up with a theme song. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Don’t you worry about that. Folks, you’ve been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly. The Heights Senior Living Specialist Avery Heights, by the way, is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. Speaker 1 Now, those who live there, they’ve got access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care and a whole lot more charming cottages with a true neighborhood feel are available to rent adjacent to the main building, where those who need more assistance reside. Please visit AveryHeights.org or by calling 860-953-1201. Again, 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next weekend, have a good one. Speaker 1 Come on, everybody. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. You will… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") ## [Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") September 5, 2023 In this episode, we interview CT Medicaid Specialists, Kristine Talarski, founder of Connecticut Medicaid Specialists on Medicaid eligibility, do’s and don’ts, and much more. Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Financial Planning, independent living, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ### [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/) **Published:** June 7, 2024 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. You will learn insights and strategies to help your senior parent overcome resistance to relocating and navigate this transition with greater ease. All attendees will receive a complimentary private consultation meeting to discuss individual situations and planning. Resources: [Be Your Own Hero Senior Living Decisions Simplified](https://www.amazon.com/Your-Own-Hero-Decisions-Simplified-ebook/dp/B089GWZYRC/ref=sr_1_1?crid=35QSWCWUYZ1I8&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.rXsgAhOGwkc-Iau9nqlijKnRqKPnuzhJrDNUhMTHCNaly88UykZdfhMulC0TsL36j8PT4NGHRBi6cUr_GGCAzNx9InmQf4Fv6PgoLp6VGJXwstHCl8MXX38D7tcgFP9ZVsgmUQiTTf5cpVWlk7nkPWyT947qzCXHIEOFTbpsa_u0Rfd6FDLZitHuwBODHGOBWJ_h3P_QuBFCHxanhXdRCY1COsGNtO-Apd7DjtnSqMI.fsHnqbkY__aBJVAsnVoy0KeJAzOYylMgWwBL1rotkk0&dib_tag=se&keywords=be+your+own+hero&qid=1717709837&sprefix=be+your+own+hero+%2Caps%2C86&sr=8-1) [Amston Transition Services ](https://guidingthemove.com/) ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 So, hello and welcome. Welcome to your next chapter. My name is Siobhan Mattingly and I am the Director of Marketing for Avery Heights. Very excited to be here today. Today, we’re going to be talking about moving forward. And to help me with that discussion is the beautiful Ms. Sheila Gavish. Speaker 2 Thank you, Siobhan. It’s really nice to be here. I appreciate the opportunity to do this with you. Speaker 1 It’s awesome to have you here. So what we’re going to talk about is moving forward. So a lot of times what we find with mom and dad, unfortunately, you know, or your loved one, they’re not ready to move to a senior living community. And a lot of times it’s necessary for medical reasons, for safety reasons. And a lot of times it’s just kind of more necessary for quality of life, socialization. It could be someone who’s newly widowed. It could be someone that their house is just getting too overwhelming for them. Speaker 1 And so we’re here to kind of help you with some tips and some reasons why they might be reluctant, but also some tips and some ways that we can help you along to help you with that conversation. And this is great, Sheila. It’s great to have you here today. Speaker 1 Thank you again. Thank you, Siobhan. So tell me a little bit about yourself, what you do, and what makes you kind of the expert on this. Speaker 2 Well, I am an expert in progress, I would say. As we all are. I am with Amstead Home Transition Solutions, and we do relocation for seniors who are doing transitional moves to communities such as yours. Speaker 2 And prior to that, I had many years designing a nursing home, life care community, CCRCs. So I have a big passion for it, a lot of interest in it. But what occurred to me, and even considering the name of our company, that we are a transition company, that the transition doesn’t end just because we move the furniture in. Speaker 2 And it certainly doesn’t begin when someone makes that decision to go to a community like yours. So it’s a very dynamic process, as you know. It’s wrought with emotion and so many decisions. Speaker 2 And I just really come to appreciate that. and what residents and their adult children and families go through in making this determination. Speaker 1 Yeah, I totally, I totally agree. Let’s kind of, I’m going to give a definition of a senior living community. I’m thinking that most people, if you’re watching this or listening to this, you probably know what a senior living community is, but I want to kind of go over that just a little bit. So independent living, why would you move someone into independent living? Some of the things I have is socialization. Again, you might be newly widowed. You might have lost all your friends. Or again, your home might just be way too much for you. Or you might be spending too much time at home in front of that TV. So that’s kind of some reasons why you might want to move your loved one if they’re going into independent living. If it’s assisted living, now this is more scarier because obviously this is more for medical reasons. And obviously that makes it and safety reasons. So they’re having trouble with their mobility. They need more help with their ADLs, activities of daily living, like cooking, showering, you know, getting dressed in the morning. Dangerous. They’re forgetful. A lot of security issues. They’re leaving stuff on the stove or, you know, maybe they’re out there wandering and that’s more of a candidate for like memory care. You’re worried about their health, their home. Is there a greatest asset? Again, that might be being neglected. Speaker 1 They may not be able to negotiate those stares and kind of get down to that washer and dryer or what have you. You’re worried about the nutrition. You know, a lot of times people come here independent and assisted living for the delicious meals. Speaker 1 You know, three meals a day, healthy meals, not just kind of a TV dinner or pretzels. Or I had one lady that was, she was really cute. Cookies was her food of choice for lunch. Speaker 1 And I’m like, okay, Not that I’m thinking, you know, in college, that’s a bad thing. But when you’re an older adult, we need the right nutrition and just that loneliness and isolation. So, you know, those are some reasons why you might want to move someone, you know, that just that quality of life. Speaker 1 And why I’m mentioning all this is just to kind of validate whoever’s kind of listening or watching this is that you’ve got valid reasons to move mom and dad. You know, that shame and guilt that you might be feeling is just because of the resistance, but you have valid reasons to do so. And so I know that there was a wonderful study that was done that kind of gave those categories of what mom and dad, let’s try to get into their shoes, which is really what I try to do. Speaker 1 And I know you try to do as well when we’re meeting with folks, try to put us, because we’re adult children as well, the adult children in that space of mom and dad or your loved ones. So you can try to empathize and understand a little bit of what’s going on. Tell me about that study and let’s talk about those five categories. Speaker 1 of what seemed there. Speaker 2 Yes, this was a very interesting study, Siobhan. It was done by a group of licensed social workers. And the way that they arrived at the study was a little bit different than sometimes when you do a study, you come up with a hypothesis and then you get information to back it up. Speaker 2 But in this case, they interviewed literally dozens of seniors pre and post move and talk to them about their decision to come into go into a community. And then they came up with five points, the five points that you want to discuss of the feelings that they had that kind of summarized their perception of their whole experience. And so the ones that and I’m sorry, I don’t have it in front of me. Speaker 1 have them here. So I’ll read them over. So number one was the inevitable. They need to move. I have to come here. And again, that empathy, I mean, think of it, we have to think about ourselves. Speaker 1 How would I feel, you know, whatever you may have those out there listening, you know, your house, you know, your condo, your apartment, and someone comes in and says, we, you need to move. I mean, that’s, that’s uncomfortable. And, and sometimes I think that, and I, and I’m guilty of it as well with my parents, which is why I ended up in this industry, is, you know, you forget this is a grown adult that, by the way, raised you, right? And this is someone that has feelings and thoughts. Speaker 1 And so, yes, it’s for their safety. Yes, it’s for the best for them. But we have to tread carefully of coming in and just, you know, that overwhelming feeling of, I’ve got to move and not that feeling of, I’ve got a choice. And then we’re going to talk about later how ways that you can still give them choices and not necessarily that you have to move type of thing. Yes. And underlying theme, Speaker 2 I’m sorry, you want to continue? No, no, go. No, I just want to say that the, you know, the theme is that it’s about lack of autonomy and lack of control over your future. And that’s why it’s so important to include the person who’s going into the as much as you can, as much as possible in every step of the way from exploring all their options to giving information and to Speaker 1 involve them in the decision. I love that. You, I, this is why Sheila’s here because she sums it all up. I like that. I like it. I like it. Number two, making the move, the abrupt departures. We were just discussing a situation where that, you know, that abrupt, you know, we’re going, you know what I mean? And, and, and talk a little bit about that and, and maybe some stuff you’ve seen out in the field with that. Speaker 2 Yeah. And sometimes, unfortunately, the decision is made abruptly due to circumstances. Sometimes there’s a health issue that makes it impossible to stay in the home any longer. Speaker 2 Sometimes there’s a death of a spouse. That’s usually very, very, plays a big, important part in that decision because there’s fear of that isolation and being alone. Parents can live very comfortably out by themselves in an urban area. Speaker 2 And then all of a sudden, when there’s only one left, they realize that they do need that companionship. You mentioned isolation and loneliness, which is one of the biggest reasons why people choose to go into a community. They need that socialization. It’s so critical to our well-being. Speaker 1 Got a little alarm going off this. Okay. That’s not our time’s up. Speaker 1 Okay. No, agreed. And just to add to that, I think, you know, like you said, if a spouse passes or something’s that affect Alzheimer’s and dementia and various unfortunate medical conditions and that other spouse, a lot of times was the caregiver and they were taking care of that other person. Speaker 1 And so you’re right, that move needs to be abrupt. What I’m seeing a lot of is divorce as well, unfortunately. And that other spouse who’s being divorced can be compromised and they need to be in a safer situation where they can get the medical attention they need. Speaker 1 So you’re right, that move does need to be abrupt at times. And there has to be, you know, we’ll talk about ways that we can help with that as well. Number three, decision making and exercising choice. Speaker 1 I think we already touched upon that. what can I do? I have no choice. And that feeling is, I mean, again, to empathize with that, what an awful feeling, feeling like I have, Oh, well, I got to do this. That’s not a, that’s not a, think of yourself when we were thinking about colleges, you know, and maybe I’m going to name some local ones here. Actually, I won’t name the ones we want to go to one university, but we end up, you know, we don’t get into that university and, Oh, well, I got to go there. Speaker 1 Maybe it turns out great, but again, where are my choices? And so think about not having a choice, your spouse, you know, You know, someone says, oh, no, you got it. That guy doesn’t want you got to marry that one. Speaker 1 It’s the same kind of situation where you got no choice and nobody wants to have no choice. For sure. I think you made a good point about kind of creating choices for your loved one as much as you can is important. Speaker 2 And of course, always trying to do that sooner than later. Yes. Yeah. Speaker 1 Not getting into that abrupt, not getting into number two or number three. Correct. maintaining identity, holding on to who I am, what I am. A lot of times for older adults, and I see it less with our generation and the generations to come, where you identify with where you live, your house, your titles. We’ve become more of people that identify as, hey, I’m Siobhan. That’s it. This is who I am. There are things that define you. Speaker 1 Yeah, I live in West Hartford on 33 Wilbrook Lane. And that’s who I am, is this house, my neighbors. So yeah, speak on that. Speaker 2 And we see that when we relocate people and do the downsizing because their belongings identify them, their sentimentality attached to it, and it’s who they are. So it’s the whole process, dynamic process. Speaker 1 And losing oneself, we were talking about it earlier, can definitely be depressing. That’s definitely if you lose track of who you are at your core, that definitely can cause depression and lashing out and anger and so forth. Last one, number five, maintaining connections. Speaker 1 I like my family to be near. And I don’t know about that one because I know a lot of times people, they want to move. They’re moving, but they live in Florida or, you know, in terms of moving to Connecticut. Speaker 1 But the, you know, the daughter or the son is in Connecticut. And so they’re moving here to be closer. So talk a little bit about that one. Speaker 2 Yeah, actually, I was talking to a senior yesterday and she said that she was living in Florida and she moved here because her two daughters were here and she didn’t want to leave Florida, but she realized that she needed some assistance. Her husband had passed away and she wanted to be near them. And she has 16 grandchildren and they all live in Connecticut. Speaker 1 Wow. Speaker 2 So, but what I hear also is some seniors, they feel guilty that their family has to care for them and worry about them when they’re not in a protective, you know, community or environment. So they move into a community because they feel guilty, but they still want to be close to their family. They want to have that, you know, that connection to be close by. So I think that’s what that kind of is about, that particular one. Speaker 1 So what was the conclusion of the study? I know you had a sum up on that. Speaker 2 Yeah, well, the conclusion is that I think everywhere along the process, we want to consider the feelings of the senior that is having to make this move, that it is not easy. There are so many emotions. And compassion and empathy and patience cannot be stressed enough. Speaker 2 It has to be considered at every step along the way. So as to avoid the I have no choice, you know, and to include them, to give them options to consider. And so also that they’re not at your mercy and to talk, you know, to kind of reframe the conversation. Speaker 2 And actually, there’s a wonderful book by Catherine L. Owens called Be Your Own Hero. And it’s decisions to go into a senior community simplified. And she talks about aging in place that, you know, the conversation really should not just be about aging in place, but rather aging in a place or being in a place where you can age well. Speaker 2 And for some people that may be at home, but for others, it may not. And so to consider all of the pros and cons with the individual that is having to move and also to help clear up misinformation, because there’s a lot of misinformation out there about what it means to move into. Yes, yes. Speaker 2 Independent living. Some of the seniors have a mindset of convalescent home. Yes. Speaker 2 Like the last stop. You know, they don’t know how wonderful a lot of these communities are, such as yours. And you and I talked about this, that they shouldn’t just go on one tour, but rather come and participate. Speaker 2 Bring your mom and dad or, you know, for the senior to go there. See what living there would be like. Partic in all of the wonderful things that you have to offer them. Speaker 1 Agreed, agreed. And I’ll have a link to the book that you mentioned, which is wonderful, in the comments of this particular recording. I think one of the things that I know we didn’t talk about discussing this, so I might throw you, but I don’t think so, because you’re awesome. Speaker 1 Let’s talk about the person, the adult child or that person that’s helping that person get into the senior living community, because it could be a friend. I know sometimes it’s a professional, different people that, you know, that might be helping that person taking care of themselves. And especially more so when it’s mom and dad and the kids or if it’s your uncle or your aunt and you’ve grown up with this person. Speaker 1 You know, I think it’s important for that. I just thought of this person to make sure they’re taking care of themselves. you know, just as important as it is for caregivers. And that really is, you are part of the caregiver team to take care of yourself, meaning check your anger, check your, you know, unresolved challenges with your childhood, empathize and don’t dehumanize your mom and dad or your parent, you know, check that frustration. Because a lot of times we’re frustrated and that’s where that, you know, we’re, and we’re not paying attention to what mom and dad are feeling. So I just thought of that as a piece of this is that it’s important that self-care for whoever that, whoever you are in that role of helping that person move forward, you’re going to get frustrated. It is going to be frustrating, especially if that person’s like, no, no, no, no, you know, think about a two-year-old, no stopping their feet, you know, or banging their hands on the, on the ground, having a tantrum, Because that’s really, I’m not belittling or taking away from the true feelings of that person who is having those feelings. Speaker 1 But it may seem like they’re having, you know, a little stubborn tantrum. And that can be frustrating because you want them to go this way and they want to go that way. And it’s not safe. Speaker 1 It’s not, you know, there’s so many you’re worrying. So I think it’s important your self-care as that person, that facilitator, let’s call them, of helping that person to move forward into a senior living community. Speaker 2 Yes, I couldn’t have said it better, Siobhan. That’s very insightful that we all need to kind of check ourselves when we are dealing with bringing up these difficult subjects, you know, and this conversation with your parents. And it’s really hard. Speaker 2 It’s definitely very complicated, complex, but, but yes, it’s their life and they need to be given as much consideration as possible. And then yes, there have to be times when you step back, take a breath for your own self, because it’s not easy. I’ve often been an advocate that there need to be caregivers for the caregivers. Speaker 1 Yes. Yeah, exactly. And, and I think we have to get off of autopilot. Speaker 1 You know, a lot of times, you know, life and we’re just like, you know, and we and we validate our feelings to the point of destruction. So, you know, oh, my gosh, she’s being stubborn. Oh, my gosh, she’s making me mad. Speaker 1 Let’s go. You know, no, check that at the door, because that’s all that’s going to do is create more resistance, more drama, more challenges for you. So it’s one of those things where they say, if you’re not forgiving someone, it’s hurting you more than it’s hurting the other person. Speaker 1 And this is a perfect situation of that in some sense, is that that reactionary mentality is only going to hurt you. You have to be strategic. This is actually, I think, easier for those of us that are parents sometimes or took care of even, you know, you know, loved, you know, babysat. Speaker 1 Anyone who’s ever been around children, this is a little easier for because you can hone in on those skills that you use to kind of because, you know, if you start yelling at a two year old, that’s not going to go anywhere. It’s going to exasperate the situation. But if you calm down and use your skills, your communication skills, as opposed to going in hot, this is a very similar situation. Speaker 2 Yeah. And then also, excellent point, Siobhan. And also, there’s a wonderful chapter in Catherine’s book about sometimes it’s necessary for the adult child to make those decisions. Speaker 2 And they’re not easy. If the parent has cognitive decline, or has beginning Alzheimer’s or more advanced, then sometimes you have to make those difficult choices for them. It’s like a child, she gives an example of a child that has to go to the dentist, you know, because they have a cavity, well, you can’t just let them let it go, because you know that the consequences are going to be far worse if you do nothing. So and it’s about for the adult child to be gentle with yourself, that sometimes you have to have that tough love and make a decision if the individual’s not capable Speaker 1 of doing it themselves. Agreed. All right. Now let’s talk about nine steps. And I think we’ve already kind of delved into that a little bit, kind of nine tips or nine steps that can help you. Speaker 1 The number one is listen to their concerns. And I think that’s, we’ve kind of discussed that. Provide information. And I think you touched upon that. You know, a lot of times when I have people come for the tour, you know, get two packets. You know, we, you know, as marketing people, we should have enough packets on hand, one for the loved one and one for yourself. Even if that loved one has dementia and Alzheimer’s and they are compromised in a way where they would never understand the packet. It’s just the gesture that, hey, you know, you’re involved in this decision process. Exactly. It’s about respect and yes. Yeah. Yes. Say that again. It’s about respect Speaker 2 and acknowledgement that yes, they are the individual that will be most affected. Speaker 1 Exactly. Number three, involve them in the decision-making process. So a lot of times, and even though I work for a senior living community director of marketing, my boss, I don’t think is going to watch this, but if he does, I always recommend see at least three senior living communities. If you have the time and the situation warrants it, see at least three, try if the person has, and again, I’m not a medical expert, if they have dementia or Alzheimer’s, try to take comprehensive notes for all of them and simplify, you know, that’s the one that had the garden. That’s the one that had the great salmon. You know, that’s the one that had the, you know, the tree outside the window. Simplify it for the person. That’s the one that had the kitchen. Remember, that’s what you wanted. And just simplify that, but definitely give, give some sense of a choice. So really, you know, pick out three that make sense, that are viable options and give that loved one the option of the three. Speaker 1 or even if it’s two, but at least give them a choice of, of at least don’t just have the one and this is where you’re going. You know, I think that’ll go better. Yep. And I’m sure you probably Speaker 2 do this when you’re first meeting with people is to find out as much information as you can about their likes and their lifestyles. You can see if you’re a good fit for them. Exactly. Agreed. Speaker 1 Agreed. Address their practical concerns. We chatted about that. Highlight the positives. Just, I just went over that. Speaker 1 Offer that emotional support. And again, we talked about for yourself as well as them. Encourage small steps. Speaker 1 And I think we touched upon that a little bit with, you know, you know, I always recommend we’re going to talk about this a little later, but it’s worth saying now as well, you know, for you, come for the tour. You as the person who’s facilitating, again, the loved one, you know, you as the adult children, you come for the tour. Then you get all your questions out of the way. Speaker 1 We look at every nook and cranny of the community. and then your parents and they come for the VIP tour where we customize it like you said to those likes hey we’re gonna if they like a books and book club we’re gonna concentrate in the library if they want to swim we’re gonna concentrate in the pool if they like knitting we’re gonna concentrate in that hobby room you know or you know but don’t call it the tour we’re gonna go visit we’re gonna go have some lunch you know come for a musical event come if you’re a veteran come for one of our veterans activities or another senior living communities veteran activities But don’t come for the tour because the tour is like that’s where I’m going to live. The visit is just the visit. Speaker 1 We’re just visiting. We’re just exploring other options. And I think it’s important to note that that it’s small steps. Speaker 1 So don’t dive into the tour, the lease. You know what I mean? Let’s get an application. Speaker 1 You know, let’s take those baby steps. And I think along with that, the baby steps is, you know, pay attention to the cues. Pay attention to the nonverbal communication. Speaker 1 Pay attention to the, read the room. That’s the word I’m looking for. Read the room. Speaker 1 Pay attention to what’s going on. You know, if there’s some negativity, that’s not the time to start talking about applications and do you like this room or that room? You know, that’s not the moment to do that. Speaker 2 Yeah, absolutely. Speaker 1 Yeah. And then I think number eight, seek professional help and respect their autonomy. And I think we’ve touched upon these, but I think it’s important. Speaker 1 I think that number eight, definitely seek professional help. I was a caregiver for my mom and I was do it all, you know, do it all on my own, you know, and I don’t think that’s the way to go. Definitely don’t do it on your own. Speaker 1 When you’re trying to do that, it’s a recipe for disaster because, you know, if you need that professional help, you know, we’re, you know, we’re the experts because we’re, because we’ve been doing it for years, you know, but, you know, you know, know, know, willing to ask for help for what you don’t know. Yep. I think those are important. All right. So now we’re getting into the good stuff. How do we talk to mom and dad or to your loved one? How do we talk to them? What’s the best approach like for just bringing up the conversation? What’s your recommendation on that? You know, how do you, how do you dive into the, do you just say, you know, set up a meeting to talk or just casually bring it up in conversation or, or again, read the room and see which works. But what’s your recommendation on some couple of different ways to start the conversation? Speaker 2 I think that the best thing to do is to ask questions just about what, you know, what your parent is feeling, how they’re, you know, how do they feel about their lifestyle right now? Is there anything they need more help with? And how do they see themselves, you know, months from now, a year from now, but mainly listening to their concerns, to really compassionate listening. So as far as the exact questions, nobody knows your parent better than you do. There’s a lot of resistance. Sometimes it’s just good to back off and just listen, let them just empty their thoughts Speaker 1 because I’m sure they have them. Speaker 2 And so often we like to jump in and, you know, give plant ideas in people’s heads, you know, but just to, to see where they’re at, kind of take the temperature. And again, following those, you know, so that’s actually the number one thing was to listen to their concerns. And then to provide information based on what they tell you, if there is something that maybe they, they have wrong, or, you know, there’s a misperception that you can provide correct information to them. So, you know, it doesn’t have to be right away, you can make mental notes, come back later and say, you know, mom, you said, you know, you didn’t want to give up your hairdresser, you know, that you’ve had. Well, they have a salon on site, you know, or, you know, so anything that you can provide, you know, some people don’t want to move because they won’t be able to play their games or card games, you know, well, we have lots of activities like that. So just trying to listen and then provide information and allow them the opportunity to keep giving you feedback and make decisions. Speaker 2 Like you said, one baby step at a time. Speaker 1 Yeah, small steps. I like that. I also always like the idea, if you can and you’re in an area, you know, try to find a place where they might have a friend there. Speaker 1 That usually goes over very well. Yeah. And sure enough, there’s always, there could be, you know, there’s always so like, talk to them about, you know, where did so-and-so go? Speaker 1 Where did so-and-so go? You know, where did, you know, your next door neighbor go? And sure enough, that’s probably a good place to start. Speaker 1 It might not be the right fit, but it’s like a good place to start because it gets them in the door to a senior community so they can see, like you said, the difference. Again, it might not be that. And then they’ll start to like buying a car. Speaker 1 You know, oh, I want this. I want that. Like you said, I want a car room. Speaker 1 I want a pool. I want this. And then you can go in and do your research and start to find those other little things that they’re that they’re looking for that maybe that place didn’t have. Speaker 1 So you don’t have to feel as though that’s going to be the place. But that’s the entree. Again, the baby step into into this world. Speaker 2 Exactly. I’m curious, Siobhan, do you ever have two friends that come in to just bring a friend if you don’t have someone there? Speaker 1 It’s nice to get that feedback. We have several here. We have several folks that are in neighborhoods, you know, and mainly in the kind of the Newington and West Hartford. Speaker 1 And we’ll have like, you know, three or four people from that neighborhood come in. And it’s it’s actually really beautiful. People that have lived in the same neighborhood for 50 years. Speaker 1 And now they are. I have one just a quick story. It was two veterans, two gentlemen. And this is a good story because the family was very resistant. Speaker 1 the the mom and the dad the I think this woman had seen eight uh different locations and I I was calling her and talking we were always chatting and I said she was I you know I don’t know Siobhan I don’t know you know I’ve seen so many places I said well why don’t you come on over and come to find out through her research which she’s wonderful she found an article and in that article one of the veterans that we honored happened to be they didn’t know where they had gone happened to be Yes. And they were neighbors for like 60 years. So that got them in the door. Again, who knew we were going to be the right community? Happened to be his birthday. They came in for dinner. They didn’t come in for the tour. They came in on a Friday night. You know us, we got the cake and we had the whole dining room sing. But the most beautiful thing was they were at our veterans wall and we were taking pictures and they put their arms around each other. And the other gentleman, so cool he said to him and I we were all emotional after this he said did you ever think 60 years ago when we were sitting on our back porch did we be here and the other guy was like nope but it was just so cool it just was so cool just to the acceptance for both of them and I’ll tell you what that night the mom looked at me and she said what do we do next where do we do we do an application. And the daughter was like, hang on, hang on. I’ll, I’ll talk to her after, you know, she’s slowing them down, but they’re ready. And sure enough, they moved in and it was, it’s been a great, it was a great situation. That’s wonderful. That’s really heartwarming. Yeah. You know, I’ve Speaker 2 had to learn the hard way. I mean, I lost my mom and my father, we moved him here to the old Saybrook area. And I thought that things would continue on just the way they were that, you know, he’d still come over and we’d hang out and, you know, our friends would be his friends. But, you know, he’s since then made his own friends and seniors need their peers. They need people that they can relate to and recount the stories. And so, and that doesn’t mean they love their family any less, but no, it’s not a substitute for socialization with peers. So that’s a beautiful Speaker 1 story. That’s what you want. I love when I see, you know, the kids get waved away, you know, Oh, don’t you want to do this? Speaker 1 No, I’m going over here to the music event. You go ahead. I’ll talk to you later kind of thing. Speaker 1 And that’s what you want. Getting older doesn’t mean life is over. And I think that’s another thing that we don’t realize. Speaker 1 They’re 80. Oh, well. No, if you’re still here, there’s still life to be had. Speaker 1 And I think it’s important to realize that. And that quality of life, having friends and going to dinner and having fun is super important. Speaker 2 Absolutely. And like you said, sometimes you can only see that when you spend time at a community with other people and you see that, my gosh, they’re really having a wonderful life here. Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah. So I think that just two other points that I know you and I have discussed that I think are important to mention, you know, bringing up the subject that, you know, things aren’t going smoothly here. Speaker 1 And again, like we talked about, read the room. You got to figure out when to bring this up. But like you said, you know, if they had to call on the plumber and the sinks, the sinks a mess and they’re like, oh, we got to replace the whole thing. Or if the lawn is about this high or, you know, it’s, you know, the big nor’easter comes and, you know, you as the adult child can’t get to your loved one to bring them, you know, their favorite sandwich or whatever. Speaker 1 it’s good to kind of little, little, you know, droplets of, Hey, you know, you know, if you were in a senior living community, this might not be happening. Not like in a, if you were in a, you know, know it all kind of way, but just a gentle, Hey, you know, if you weren’t a senior living community, this wouldn’t be, this is one of those things, it might not be an issue. All with gentle and love, I think is, is important. And I think the other one is to understand the difference between aging in place and putting into place what you will need to age well because a lot of times there’s that severe guilt of mom and dad I promised them that they would be able to stay in their home first of all stop promising that I’m gonna get t-shirts stop promising that because you know I know you know I’m getting older grandkids whatever whatever and I told my kids whatever you need to do so stop promising them you’re not you have no crystal ball that can promise that they’ll be able to stay in their home. Speaker 1 So I think that’s, yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 Sometimes I’m asking them, what does it mean to be independent for you? And then you might look at, are you really independent? Exactly. Speaker 2 You are. Could you be more independent by living in a community where they might have bus trips, they might have transportation available to you? You wouldn’t have to rely on your children or others. Speaker 2 So you could have more autonomy in what you’re going to do. Speaker 1 The logical, being logical is, you know, spreadsheets and logic is really, we have a wonderful one, living at home versus living in a senior living community. And it really just nails down those various points and simplifies it. So that’s something that’s available, which we’ll have a link to here as well. Speaker 1 Yeah, I think we’ve touched upon a lot. It’s a big topic. You know, definitely reach out to myself or Sheila. Speaker 1 Our contact information will be noted as well if there’s anything, you know, any questions you have or anything like that. But I think it’s important. It’s a big topic. It’s a it’s a customized, individualized. Speaker 1 Exactly. Well, so what’s yeah. Yeah. So don’t one size doesn’t don’t run home and and try what, you know, your friend at the gym tried because that necessarily is not necessarily going to work. Speaker 1 But, you know, we’ll have more of this for sure. I know we’ve got other topics that we’re going to talk about. Sheila, thank you so much for being here. Thank you, Siobhan. Speaker 2 I couldn’t have said it any better than you did. I mean, really, I think you touched on everything. And I think that whoever comes to, to your community is very lucky to, to have you who has such a great grasp on the overall picture of what this, what this means, these transitional moves. Speaker 1 Yeah. Well, you know, we love working with you at Amstead as well. We appreciate you guys. Thank you so much, everyone. Speaker 1 This has been your next chapter. We look forward to the next one for sure. And as always, have a great day. Speaker 1 Thank you. Speaker 2 Thank you. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") ## [Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") September 8, 2023 The Heights at Avery Heights was honored to speak with Teepa Snow one of the world’s leading advocates and educators for anyone living with dementia… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") ## [Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") September 5, 2023 In this episode, we interview CT Medicaid Specialists, Kristine Talarski, founder of Connecticut Medicaid Specialists on Medicaid eligibility, do’s and don’ts, and much more. 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Listen as we talk about the importance of socialization and provide tips for making new friends that will help make your life rich and enjoyable. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good to Saturday morning to everybody. Welcome to your next chapter, a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community. Avery Heights, they are a 43 acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Speaker 1 Now, this show provides helpful tips and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. Now, from topics related from physical to emotional health, financial health, senior living communities, and a whole lot more. Along with Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Siobhan, what’s going on? How are you this morning? I’m good. How are you? Speaker 1 I’m not doing too shabby. Nice to see you. Yeah, good to see you. Speaker 1 Thank you. It’s nice to be seen. How was your week? Speaker 2 It was good. It was good. It was good. Speaker 1 What have you been up to? Speaker 2 I’ve been working out a lot. Yeah. Speaker 1 Really? Speaker 2 Yeah. I’ve been working out five days a week. Five days a week. Speaker 1 At a gym? Speaker 2 At a gym. We have a gym at Avery Heights. Speaker 1 For everybody? For everybody. Speaker 2 Yeah. The residents and the staff. And it’s really good. Speaker 2 It’s got all the equipment, free weights. It’s got the little Fosu ball and all sorts of stuff. Yeah. Speaker 2 It makes it very convenient right down the hall. Speaker 1 It’s open all day. Speaker 2 All day. Yep. look at that Speaker 1 why am I not surprised? Avery Heights has everything Speaker 2 yes, yes, that’s pretty cool we have a personal trainer there too Mark, he’s been there for a million years, I think he’s been there at least 16 years and he does a great job he customizes, it’s good for anybody really, but people that have had a stroke or even Parkinson’s and different things that affect your mobility he customizes their plan, their fitness plan, and yeah, he does a great job has got a huge huge following at Avery Heights he also does the classes a lot of exercise classes Speaker 1 he does as well group classes how where does he how would he know what’s good for one person as opposed to like how does he get somebody on a program that’s different from right you know Speaker 2 somebody else’s so he’s trained specifically in for senior living so yeah he works actually also at the West Hartford Senior Center in Elmwood and the one in Bishop’s Corner. So he’s been doing this for years. And so he’s specifically trained in this. Speaker 2 He’s not just kind of a personal trainer. He’s kind of trained in it. I don’t know why I keep doing that. Speaker 2 It’s a good thing it’s not visual. That’s it. You’re lifting weights. Speaker 2 I’m flexing here. You’re flexing. Speaker 1 You’re showing off your muscles. Talk about all the workouts that you’ve been doing. Speaker 2 Exactly. But it’s been great. Speaker 1 What’s your favorite type of – when you like to work out, do you work out on weights? Do you do a lot of cardio? Speaker 2 I do all of it. Yeah. Free weights, the machines, and cardio. Speaker 2 This new machine, it’s like an elliptical machine, but it does like specifically for your legs and your glutes. I love it. I love it. Speaker 2 Yeah, that’s my favorite. And the row machine. Those are my two favorite. Speaker 1 The row machine, like your own boat? Yeah, the row machine. Speaker 2 Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah, the rower. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s a lot, though. You have to – I think I can remember her name. Speaker 2 She’s a motivational speaker. I think her first name is Meg. But she talks about the five-second rule. Speaker 2 So you have to like – Speaker 1 That’s not about dropping something on the floor, right? Speaker 2 No, I know, right? No. Five seconds. She has a new twist to it. Speaker 1 Oh. Speaker 2 Yes. So you have to like go in that five seconds. And so for me, like yesterday is a good example. Speaker 2 I like to work out in the morning. I like to get it done and I always want to go. But it’s like last night I was like doing a million things and I was just like I need to go to the gym. Speaker 2 Like you can’t miss the day. Your scheduled days. Sure. Speaker 2 And so I went at like 7 o’clock at night and it was that five second rule where you got to go. If you don’t go in that five seconds, you’ll make a million excuses and you won’t go. so I was fascinated as I was on the elliptical machine I was like I am at the gym right now how did this happen how did this happen but I did it I did it you’re right yeah yeah that five second rule and we have a pool I got to mention the pool too we have a full-size pool yeah an indoor indoor pool indoor pool it’s beautiful it’s actually donated uh by one of our families um a resident who passed who uh family donated love to swim um and it’s a huge pool I don’t know if it’s olympic size i don’t know whether i want to say olympic size but it’s a huge pool i mean you can do laps it’s got the whole you know three feet four feet six feet type of thing um they do lessons um you can do exercise classes they do the water aerobics and different classes great exercise yeah and they have the open swim as well and people can come from the outside to the pool also like friends and family yep yep yep they were you know with covid obviously they were restricting that but now they can come in they can have a membership uh to the pool yeah what don’t you have at Avery? I know. That’s what I love. That’s why I’m so blessed to work there. Speaker 2 You really are. It was my dream job because they definitely answer all the senior living questions. Folks, Speaker 1 moving into a senior living community, it could be a huge adventure. You’re packing up a lifetime of stuff to start over in a place where, well, where are the people? There’s people. There’s new culture. There’s a lot of stuff. A lot of stuff is just different. Speaker 1 Not necessarily better, not necessarily worse, just different. And how do you know you’re going to like something unless you try it or you’re exposed to it? Yet thousands of Americans, they make the move to senior living communities or assisted living residents each year. Speaker 1 Often they are seeking not just a more relaxing or simplified lifestyle, possibly reliable medical support, but also life with new friends, companions, socialization that they weren’t quite getting at home, which has made their, really their previous decades rich and enjoyable. You know, to that point, neighborhoods age out. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 You know, where you see the life cycle. You know, what reminds me of this is not too long ago, I was in, at the time, My mother grew up in Wethersfield and I was in the neighborhood where my mother grew up in. And when I was a kid, this was everybody around there was old. Speaker 1 The neighbor on the right side, the neighbor on the left side, two houses down, across the street, around the block. I equated, this is a child brain, by the way. This is back when I was like in single digits, seven, eight, nine years old. Speaker 1 I just thought this neighborhood was for senior citizens. It was for old people. And my mother used to laugh at that. Speaker 1 I said, no, that’s just how it is right now. And then what will happen is as people age out and there’ll be new people that will come in. But when you’re one of the few remaining seniors of that neighborhood and you miss Marge next door, who we used to chat with, but she’s passed on. Speaker 1 And you missed somebody else who’s moved away and maybe lives with their family somewhere or moved out of state. Or you all have all these younger neighbors. Oh, it might be very nice. Speaker 1 Yeah. But you’ve got not much in common with them. Right. Speaker 1 You know? Right. And when you want to have conversation, you know, remember that show we used to? Speaker 1 Oh, no. That’s way bigger. I never, Jack Benny, never heard of him. You never heard of him. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. No. And it’s, remember Arthur Godfrey Hour? And it’s, no, never heard of him. Speaker 1 Really. And it’s kind of funny in some ways. But when you have nobody that is relatable to you, that in itself can be sad. Speaker 1 Or sometimes you just like to be with, I don’t even necessarily want to say like-minded people. You don’t have to have necessarily a ton in common. But you lived in a certain era where when you hear a song or see a movie, it takes you back to when that song was the current hit or when that movie. Speaker 1 I remember seeing this movie and so was I. It’s great. It is nice. Because that’ll help you. Speaker 1 don’t even necessarily know that person’s name up front. But when you start to have this conversation, I remember I was, I saw that on an afternoon matinee and now you’re talking with somebody. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 And then that gets translated to the dining area. And then that gets translated to, well, we’ll have to meet back up here tomorrow. And then we can play cards next week. Speaker 1 And then we’ll have to sit out and have tea or coffee under the tree. It’s organic. And how you create these relationships, friendships, really. Speaker 2 Yeah. And the friendships are so nice to see. Right outside my office now, we’ve started this little area. They’re renovating it. It used to be a cafe. And again, with COVID, they had to change it up. Speaker 2 It was like a self-serve cafe. And so now they’ve made it into a little social area. So there’s a couch, there’s a nice little coffee table, and then there’s all these chairs. And we had to bring more chairs for that area. And so it’s women, it’s men, and at a certain time, like around like three o’clock, they all kind of gather there. And it’s neat. And you hear laughing and they’re talking and there is music sometimes playing. It’s really nice to see. It’s, you know, it’s just, it’s what it’s all Speaker 1 about in terms of seeing your living, that friendship, that life. I think it adds more life to you. I think it adds more years to you. Oh yeah, socialization is super important. Speaker 1 Super important. And we’ve talked about loneliness. In fact, just a few weeks ago, we talked about loneliness on this show and the sad statistics that have really intensified because of COVID, which as we all know, has caused tons of isolation and increased loneliness among our older adults. Speaker 1 But how is being alone and isolated, Siobhan, how is that hurting our senior population? Speaker 2 Well, definitely anyone that has dementia or Alzheimer’s, it definitely makes it worse. If you’re sitting around just watching TV and you’ve been diagnosed with dementia or Alzheimer’s, it can increase that. It can, you know, you’re just, you’re not using your brain cells. Speaker 2 You’re not being stimulated. You’re not having any excitement or any interaction. And it can really, we’ve seen many people go from, they’re like, how did my loved one, you know, decline so quickly? Speaker 2 They were, you know, maybe early or mid-stages. And all of a sudden, they’re already in almost like late stages mannerisms or behaviors. And so we’ve seen that a lot. Speaker 2 You know, people that come to our memory care. And we’ve been able to kind of help with that. Kind of, you know, the other day we had a resident that just came back in May. Speaker 2 Lovely, lovely lady. She was playing the piano the other day. We didn’t even know, you know, that she played the piano. And I looked over and I’m like, and she’s, I mean, she’s playing the piano. She wasn’t just kind of doing chopsticks or something. She was, yeah. And so, you know, it’s important, you know, anyone diagnosed with that, that isolation is just brutal to anyone diagnosed with that. Speaker 2 Anyone that has like cancer or any kind of ailment like that, they’re not being treated properly or it’s not being diagnosed quick enough because a lot of older adults aren’t going to the doctor properly or they weren’t going to the doctor properly at least these last couple of years. And so now they’re going in and they’ve got a pain here. I had one lady, she had, she thought she had fell on the ice. Speaker 2 She went to the doctor, thought it was a lot of pain, thought it was, you know, oh, she fell on the ice. She had cancer and she was in terminal cancer, you know, and this was something that could have been caught early, but she hadn’t been to the doctor. And so finally she got to the doctor and it was like weird that, you know, what was going on with that the fall. Speaker 2 And they and she got diagnosed with cancer and the husband was just devastated. Speaker 1 So living in a senior living community, it really can help. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah. I’m just listening to you. Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, if you’re, you know, you know, doctor’s appointments, we have medical transportation to get you to those doctor’s appointments. Speaker 2 So you can, you know, make sure you can make it there. So you’re not, you know, not going there. You know, bad diets. Speaker 2 I mean, people are eating horribly and probably older adults were not eating the best if they’re left to themselves before. But now it’s even worse because, you know, now they’re not going to the senior center. They’re not, you know, they’re not, they’re afraid to take in sometimes that meals on wheels. Speaker 2 You know, what if someone touched it that has, that has COVID and then depression, suicide, medication taken wrong I mean that is the worst I mean you see people you know that table of medication and they’re taking you know one person was saying that their loved one took Benadryl three times in one day and she couldn’t understand and she was starting to fall and she was sluggish well you’re taking Benadryl I mean Benadryl wipes me out and if you’re taking it incorrectly it can Speaker 1 be very detrimental you mentioned a couple of times already falling over yeah you know falls yeah yeah if you’re living alone yep and you fall over now it’s one thing if you’ve got a phone right Speaker 2 next or the monitors the another fall oh i can’t get up right but okay so from the same generation Speaker 1 who doesn’t remember that commercial that that was more than a commercial that’s marketing right pop culture exactly the 80s yep yep um no but to that point you know it’s okay so if you’re living and you have that monitor, which is a good thing. But I don’t want any stretch of the imagination when I ever discourage anybody from wearing that. It certainly is a lifesaver. But it would take the other person on the other side of that monitor to make some phone calls. There’s still precious time. Speaker 2 Yes, yes. Speaker 1 And now if you don’t have that monitor and you fall over, you hope you’re falling next to your phone. My goodness, because how else is anybody going to know that you fall over? Speaker 2 There are stories. Speaker 1 You probably have heard them Speaker 2 where people are in the house for days, hours. And they, you know, they’re just, they can’t, and luckily someone comes to visit or someone comes over and that person was on the floor for hours. And obviously, you know, that’s not good, you know. Speaker 1 Yeah, but if you’re in a senior living facility. Speaker 2 Well, there are safety checks. There are safety checks. Speaker 1 There we go. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. And then also there’s safety, we have other, for our independent living folks, we have safety checks for them. So they don’t come to, you know, dining or, you know, we have a little tag that we have at the top of the door. Speaker 2 And if that tag is not moved by like a certain time in the morning, the staff goes around and checks those. And if that’s not moved, meaning they haven’t left their apartment, we’ll check on them. Because obviously if they’re independent, we can’t be overly intrusive. Speaker 2 But we do have that check system to make sure that obviously they’re coming out and things are okay. Speaker 1 How often is that? A couple times a day? Speaker 2 Yeah. They have, yeah. They check that, yeah. Every morning they go out and check to make sure those tags are moved. And then the security puts them up every evening. Speaker 1 That’s what I’m talking about. At home, you don’t have that. Speaker 2 No. And if you’re in assisted living, you could be on a program where you can get checks every hour. And some people need that. Some people really need to be checked on. Speaker 1 How often do people transition from your cottage, which is more independent living, to the more, I guess, more you’re looked at? You go to independent. Speaker 2 So you can be out in the cottages, which is almost like living in a little house. They’re adorable. And then you can come inside to an independent apartment. Speaker 2 And then your next step would be assisted living, memory care. And then obviously we have the skilled as well. So those transitions are happening all the time, all the time. Speaker 1 They start in one area. Speaker 2 Yep. And some people have been in the cottages for years. I mean, you know, 10, 12 years. Speaker 2 Yeah. And then some people, they’ll come inside. And we had one resident, we had a social yesterday, and he’s been there 16 years and started out in the cottages. Speaker 2 Now he’s an independent resident. And, you know, people like it. It becomes their home and it has a nice continuum of care. Speaker 2 You don’t have to make several moves. Because as an older adult, and even just myself or yourself, it’s hard to keep moving. I mean, our brains, I believe, are different. Speaker 2 Like for me, I mean, I can move around a little bit. But older adults, especially if you have Alzheimer’s dementia, moving around like that can be extremely detrimental. Speaker 1 Success stories. You must have witnessed a ton. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. I’ve got some good ones. One of them was a lady who moved in. Speaker 2 Just two ladies, actually. One of them, very angry. she was at home by herself. She had diabetes, unfortunately. So she couldn’t, the insulin wasn’t working out. So the family moved her in. She didn’t want to move in. The other one, same thing. She didn’t want to move in. She had problems with her mobility. Neither one of them wanted to be there. They’re very like, ah, one of them was, and I just don’t pay attention. I peel back there and I don’t pay attention to that. One of them was in the army. And she even apologized to me. She goes, you know, I was a, you know, a sergeant in the army and, you know, forgive me if I come off a little harsh. Speaker 2 And I was like, okay. Well, somewhere in there, those two met at activities and functions and became best friends. I mean, and it was so cool to see. Speaker 2 I would go by the apartment, walk by, and I love Days of Our Lives. And I hear, you know, the hourglass, you know. Like sands for the hourglass. Speaker 2 And so I started going in, and they loved me. They were so nice to me. I’d go in, and they were like, you know, they always said, we don’t like the rest of the people here. Speaker 2 But they liked me. But I would go in and I would sit with them sometimes. And it’s the same characters, Bo and Hope. Speaker 2 Hope and Victor Cariakis. Yeah, it’s the same people. Patch, is Patch still there? Speaker 2 I think, yes. And he, I don’t think he has the Patch anymore though. Well, Patch doesn’t have the Patch? Speaker 2 He lost the Patch, yeah. Speaker 1 And is it Bo with the dark hair and the beard? Speaker 2 Is it still the same guy? Peter Rickle or something like that? It’s hysterical. Speaker 2 So I could just jump right in. I didn’t have to, you know, some new characters, obviously. So, but it was just so neat to see these two women have friendships. Speaker 2 And then they were at crafts and activities and everything. And that, to me, I never saw that coming. I mean, the goal with them is for them to be safe, obviously, medically get what they needed. Speaker 2 I never saw a friendship coming there. So that was a really, really cool story. Another one was a lady at a place. Speaker 2 She came in on hospice. She literally came wheeled in. I mean, I met her looking over her. Speaker 2 She was in the bed, and they didn’t think it was going to be long. They thought, you know, she ended up reviving and just became a socialite of the community. She had, and she was like from New York. Speaker 2 So she had all the hats and she was at everything. So that was a good one as well. And another one, similar situation. Speaker 2 Tell me, tell me. I love, I really do love this. I love this. Speaker 2 This is why I do what I do. This one gentleman, he was at a rehab and we went to go. The family wanted us to go. Speaker 2 It was the daughter-in-law who was amazing. We went to go see him. He was laying in bed and he kept on saying how he wanted to die. Speaker 2 It was the saddest thing in the world. So it was a tough one because we had to bring him in. We had to bring him in with additional support, which we do have. Speaker 2 We do have private duty can come in and kind of be that additional support. And it was so funny. I was looking for him in the community because I always like to go say hi. Speaker 2 So clearly I’m going to go up to the apartment. This guy is not going to be downstairs. I’m running everywhere. Speaker 2 All of a sudden, oh, he’s in the dining room. I’m like, no, he’s not. But he was in the dining room sitting there dressed, and he went to everything. Speaker 2 He only lived for six months. But the family, I remember crying with them because they were like, you know what? It was only six months, but it was the best six months of his life. Speaker 2 And so those are the stories that for me, it just warms my heart that we could flip that switch and make that change. Speaker 1 How do you, I don’t know if this is the right show or episode of the show for that, but maybe I’ll just touch upon it and we can maybe dedicate another show to it. But when you grow attached to these people and they become part of your everyday. Yes. Speaker 1 Hey, there’s Gladys. And hey, there’s Judy. Yeah. Speaker 1 You just what sparked this is you mentioned hospice care and person lasted six months. And sadly, you grow attached to these people. Yes. Speaker 1 And you see them kind of deteriorate in front of your eyes. Yes. After you’ve already formed a bond or a relationship with them. Speaker 1 How do you work with that? How do you deal with that? Speaker 2 I think I learned a long time ago because I was in hospice for about five years. And I think what I learned, and my first week there they did an in-service and it was amazing. And it was the chaplain that did it. Speaker 2 And what he taught me is that it’s not about me. And I really needed to hear that like day one or day two I think it was of my time there. And we come into these folks live at a certain time for a reason. Speaker 2 And so it’s not, if I’m sitting there, and I was crying with this family, but it was like almost allowed at that point. But it wasn’t like if she started consoling me, then that’s wrong. It was more like a happy cry. Speaker 2 But it’s not about me to kind of get in there and be upset or emotional. Speaker 1 But we’re human beings. We are. And I’m sorry, but if you don’t get emotionally attached to – I’m not saying you should be sobbing with the family. Speaker 1 Right. Because they want to expect a level of professionalism, of course. But how do you – in a quiet moment, how do you keep it together? Speaker 2 That’s what you do. That’s what you do. You kind of – I remember I’ve had several actually. Speaker 2 you know a wonderful gentleman he was an architect and I found out later he was the first architect black architect in Boston had no idea about that amazing guy another one came in on hospice and he wasn’t with us for very long but he made an imprint on that on the community and he passed away and that’s what you do you really go I go in the stairwell I go in my office I shut the door and I have that cry and then I go back out and I and I and I help the family and to me it’s a gift to have those relationships. I mean, these are just amazing people. And the stories, we had this one guy, he was from Cuba and he used to like dance through the hallway. Speaker 2 And the music was so loud, but no, but the residents in mind, it was one of those things where they were like, tell him to shut that off because he would like dance to the community. Another gentleman, unfortunately on hospice, but just a great guy. And as you can see, like the imprint in my life. Speaker 2 And so to me, that’s a blessing, even though I only knew them for a short period of time. that relationship has meant everything to me and it informs who I am well sure Speaker 1 I can tell folks you are listening to your next chapter a production of Avery Heights Senior Living Community along with Siobhan Mattingly I’m Gary Byron are there tips that you could offer someone to I don’t know make friends I guess yeah Speaker 2 well first off I want to say it’s normal to be nervous but I think it’s important and I always try to tell them to make it an exciting adventure. So the first thing I would say is definitely ask for help. But that’s easier for Speaker 1 some people than others, right? It is. It is. But like I told you about those two ladies. Right, Speaker 2 right. You know, there’s, there’s some, there’s someone for everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, there’s, you know, we have over like 100 plus residents. So there’s somebody in there that you’re going to connect with. And the first thing, like I said, is to just to ask for help. You know, the family can ask for help or you can ask for help. You know, take, take on the new stuff. Don’t, Don’t be closed-minded. Speaker 2 You know, do the painting, do the writing, do the theater, do the knitting, do the singing. Don’t go, oh, I never liked that in my life. Because you would be amazed at how many talents that come out later on in life. Speaker 2 You would see paintings that we have that are up on the wall and you’re like, oh, who did that? And it’s like someone, oh, did she paint, you know, in college or never even maybe touch the paintbrush when they were in kindergarten or something. You would be amazed at the talent that comes out. Speaker 2 So I would just go for it. Be open-minded. Say hello to folks when you’re in the hallway. Speaker 2 Definitely do your meals. Do the meals in the dining room. That’s key. Speaker 2 That’s socialization. Some folks leave their doors open, you know, so that people can, yeah, people walk by and it invites people in. You know, be a good listener, you know, and just find the other new residents. Speaker 2 And we help to do that. We help facilitate for folks to find the new residents. Speaker 1 I was going to say, like, what if that stuff, what if it’s just not working? Speaker 2 Yeah. Well, we have meetings every week. We have what we call our risk management meetings. Speaker 2 And that includes talking about people that are not coming out or struggling socially. And so our life enrichment director, which is our activities director, she’s involved in that. Our social worker, our social worker does an orientation with all of our residents and the residents’ families. Speaker 2 She does a comprehensive questionnaire, what they like, how they like it. How do you want your activities counted? How do you want this? Speaker 2 How do you want to meet people? She does a comprehensive of that. She walks them around the community. Speaker 2 The front desk receptionists are amazing at connecting people as well. They’re the hub. They know everything. Speaker 2 Yeah. And so there’s a lot of people that get involved, and we don’t stop getting involved either. I mean, we’re always doing – So there’s a plan. Speaker 1 You have programs in place. There’s always a plan. And it really sounds like everybody at Avery Heights is involved in helping people break that ice. Speaker 2 And the director is amazing too. Bill has been with the organization for like 30 years. And so he seems to know everything about all the residents, and he’s good about engaging, walking around. Speaker 2 He actually goes out to the cottages, especially during the summer when it gets really, really hot. And he goes around with water or lemonade and iced tea and delivers it to them and sits and talks with them and makes sure he engages with all the residents. So he’s not just kind of sitting up in his office, you know, pointing at people. Speaker 2 And so and that’s another thing, too. And that engagement, he’ll, you know, he’ll be like, oh, oh, you like, oh, you know, so-and-so just got a kitten. You know, he kind of like kind of like brings everybody into the pool. Speaker 1 OK, but what about family members now? Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 What can they do to help a loved one, let’s say, connect their, not only just socializing with people there, but just connecting to their new environment of senior leader? Speaker 2 I think the main thing they can do is don’t be pushy and don’t be judgy. Oh, you didn’t go to the theater group this week or you didn’t go. You know, don’t be pushy. Speaker 2 Don’t be judgy. You know, give them space. Listen to them. Speaker 2 Let them talk. Let them kind of, you know, talk about why they’re not doing it. You know, be open-minded as well. Speaker 2 I don’t know how many tours I do with people and I’ll be talking about the various activities. oh, we have a pool. Oh, mom would never swim. You know, and I don’t know how many times that exact same person is floating around in the pool. It’s like, be open-minded. Allow your loved one, your mom or your dad to be something else because they can be something else. Maybe they never swim because they didn’t have time. Maybe they were raising the kids and cooking and cleaning and doing whatever, working a job, and they didn’t have time to be, you know, in a knitting group or, you know, painting or whatever these things may be, or working out. How many times I take people by the gym. Oh, mom would never work out. Well, you don’t know that. So don’t, don’t put them in that box. Um, you know, and again, be understanding, um, it’s scary and be supportive. Don’t, don’t push so much. A lot of times family members are like, mom, you like bingo, you should go. And it’s like, you know what, maybe she should go, but relax a little bit and show up, show up. Like, like, um, we had our earlier episode this past week where we were talking about dining, show up. Speaker 2 You can come to the dining room anytime, have a function in the private dining room, but everybody Speaker 1 engages at their own pace. Yes. You know, just because one person’s more advanced and more outgoing. They were probably more outgoing as an adult. Exactly. And some people are slower to adapt. Exactly. But that doesn’t mean that they won’t. They just want to do it at their own pace. Speaker 2 And it’s pretty neat. We had this one new resident that came in and the family was very concerned and calling all the time. And oh, he’s not in his apartment. It’s like, he’s not in his apartment because he’s in the library reading the newspaper. And they’re like, oh, well, we want to talk to him. I’m like, let him read the newspaper. You know, let him engage. Speaker 2 Let him build his new life. I understand your concern. That’s great. Speaker 2 But you don’t have to talk to him right now. Don’t make him go back to his apartment so you can have a phone call. Let him read the newspaper in the library. Speaker 2 So it’s almost like, you know, your kids. Yeah. You know what I mean? Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Avery Heights. Now, for more information on today’s topic, making friends in a senior living community, please call 866-537-1444. Again, it’s 866-537-1444. Speaker 1 Now, the first three callers right now, you’re going to get a special lunch and tour at Avery Heights. So let me give you that number one more time. I want you to call right now. Speaker 1 It’s 866-537-1444. All right, so dial right now, and you’ll get a free special lunch and tour. Great show. Speaker 1 Really, I’m serious, Siobhan. This was really good. Talk about assimilating yourself into a new environment. Speaker 1 It can be intimidating for some, but you go at your own pace. I want to thank you again for the wonderful resource that you are for Avery Heights. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Thank you so much for listening to your next chapter. Until next Saturday morning, have a good one, everybody. So long. Speaker 1 Legenda Adriana Zanotto # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Healthy Aging & Wellness, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Healthy Aging, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living, Wellness --- ### [Highlights from The Heights in 2023](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/highlights-from-the-heights-in-2023/) **Published:** January 2, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Upcoming events at The Heights for 2023 and explain a little bit about our podcast calendar for the New Year as well… ### + Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to you and welcome to your next chapter production of the Heights at Avery Heights, a one of a kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Folks, it is never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. Your next chapter, it delves deep into topics that will improve the way we think about aging, senior living, and the retirement years. It is time to celebrate our seniors and give them wholehearted encouragement to bravely step up to new experiences with optimism, inner peace, and the courage to never give up on growing. We’re going to discuss exciting opportunities, important resources for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Siobhan, good morning. Good morning. How are you? Speaker 2 I’m awesome. You didn’t read my title. Oh, I’m sorry. Senior living specialist. I keep giving myself titles. Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Pardon me. You know why? I crossed it out. I crossed it out. No. I didn’t mean to cross out your title. I crossed out hosted by Gary Byron because I don’t like to talk about me in the third person. So I just crossed out that line and it went into your line. I’m sorry. No malice here. No malice. Speaker 2 This makes me into like what do they call it? The thought leaders, right? Is that what they call them? Thought leaders? Speaker 1 Those are the people that. Sure. You can call yourself. You’re all of it, girl. You’re the complete package. Senior living specialist. What does that mean? I knew you were going to ask me that. You know, you opened up that can of worms, so I’m going there. Speaker 2 It means that, well, I’ve been in the industry for probably about like 15 years now. So I feel like, and I’ve been in hospice. I’ve been in home care. I’ve been in senior living communities. And I’ve been around, you know, most of the other stuff. So I feel like, I mean, you know, I just feel like I’m more than just, you know, the heights marketing person. I feel like when people come to me, I can give them more information, you know, even if we’re not possibly right at that time, the right place for them. Speaker 1 Are you able to take and draw upon your experiences from all of your previous employment, including hospice? Yes. And bring it to the heights. You know, I have a friend of mine. Actually, he was the pastor that did my wedding. He is, he worked for hospice for a while. And he says, and he’s been a pastor for nearly all of his adult life. And he says, Gary, you never, if there’s not a day that you do that job where it doesn’t impact you. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 And because I’m like, is it just after a while where it’s just faces that people you don’t know? He goes, no, no, no. This is someone’s family. This is someone’s father, mother, brother. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 Son, daughter. Yep. You know, it’s never an easy job. And he says, people, you can’t even do it for a long period of time. You maybe go back to it years down the road, but to do it all the time permanently, it drains on you. And I would imagine that if you worked in hospice that. Speaker 2 Yeah, I did it for about four years and it is challenging. And it’s hard. I mean, especially when you’re meeting with the person who’s passing, you know, when they’re signing them self signing themselves in or their own person is what we call it. And that’s challenging when someone’s signing themselves on to hospice because, and they’re there, they’ve resolved and they usually are very, you know, there’s some emotional moments and so forth. But for the most part, you know, they’re very, you know, they’re accepting, they’re there, they’re, you know, they’ve decided to move forward with this. But it’s hard because, you know, to watch them and to know that, you know, I mean, you get to a point where you’re kind of, you know, you’re laughing and you’re telling stories. And then but you always go back to remembering the fact that I’m signing you up for hospice. And, you know, hospice doesn’t always have to mean death. You know, you have a six month diagnosis. But most of the time when you’re signing yourself up, you’ve made the decision to stop treatment. And usually that does ultimately go that route. Speaker 1 So you’re really seeing somebody of sound mind up front and then gradually, you know it’s inevitable because they wouldn’t have contacted you in hospice. But that’s challenging. Speaker 2 It’s like how do you get there, though? Yeah. How do you, you know, even in life now, I mean, there are days where you’re just exhausted and you’re like, oh, I can’t wait till it’s over. And then there are days where you’re just like, you know, you want to see your kids. You know, my daughter’s 13. I want to see her graduate and have her own kids and get married. I want the, you know, but then it’s inevitable. I mean, you know, I’m almost, you know, I’m almost 60. So when you’re looking at age, you know, how much more time do I have? You know, maybe, maybe 50 years if you count, you know, a lot of people are living older now. I mean, we have people in our community. Oh, yeah. We have people in our community that live. Speaker 1 Well, the law of averages, though. Speaker 2 I don’t know if I want to live 110. I don’t know if we have quite a few people that are older. Like, well, you met Alan. He’s going to be 100 in July. So, and it’s neat to see people that are getting older and they’re like, like Alan. I mean, he does his own laundry. I mean, he does his own everything. Speaker 1 I’m going to be 30 in March. I can’t. Yeah. The big 3-0. Yeah. Speaker 2 Something-0, but it’s not. Speaker 1 No, it’s not even-0. I’ll be, it’ll end in three. Yeah. It’ll end in the number three. Speaker 2 60, 70. Speaker 1 30, 33. 33. Speaker 2 33\. Can you imagine? My son’s going to be 30 in March. Speaker 1 Don’t let the gray hair fool you, Siobhan. Speaker 2 Some people are really gray. I put it there. Some people, yeah. Speaker 1 I put it there. I have, yeah, to make myself look more distinguished. Speaker 2 Distinguished. There you go. Speaker 1 Because it’s really jet black. Speaker 2 People take you seriously. Or you could do an accent, too. Speaker 1 You could have done an accent. Speaker 2 Hello. Speaker 1 Hello. Hello. Speaker 2 Hello. Speaker 1 I wanted the George Clooney look. Oh, yeah. So I figured it works for him. Speaker 2 That guy, him and Brad Pitt, what is with their aging? Ageless. Right? But they age, and the age makes them just look better, in my opinion. Speaker 1 How was your Christmas, by the way? Speaker 2 It was phenomenal. It was really good. I went to go see my grandson. He’s so cute. He’s just, he does this little thing with his nose now. Like he smiles at you and then he does that little scrunchy nose thing. So like his personality. No, but his little personality is coming out. Like he’s not just like smiling because, you know, I don’t know, he’s got gas. He’s like smiling because, you know, he really wants to smile at you and it’s so neat. Speaker 1 I smile only when I have gas. So you know when I have it. When I’m winking at you, that’s a disguise. Speaker 2 You know, that’s little kids, though. That’s what they do. But he’s so cute. He’s so smart. Like, we got him this little toy, and he learned so quickly. Like, he figured out. We got him this little thing. It’s almost like a Connect Four with animals. And he figured out where to put it, how to open the doors. I mean, he’s just very. And he’s only one. He just turned one. Wow. Yeah. Pretty bright for one, huh? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He’s a smart kid. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 Well, that’s good. And tell me a little bit about Avery Heights during the Christmas weekend. Speaker 2 Oh, my gosh. It was so cool, actually. I actually worked late on Friday. On Festivus? You did? I did. I should have got myself out of there, which I finally did. But I’m glad I did. They actually had a sing-along. They do a social hour every Friday. But this was around the tree. It was a social hour with holiday songs. And a girl was playing the piano. And it was so cool. They tried to sing that song, Oh, Christmas Tree. This was hysterical. And she passed out words, but then people started requesting songs, and no one knew the words. So I’m in my office, and I printed them off from Google, and I started handing them out. But it was so pretty. It was really pretty. Speaker 1 That’s me on the 12 days of Christmas. I never get… All right, so I know the partridge in a pear tree is the first day. Five golden rings. That’s all I know. Speaker 2 Oh, wow. Speaker 1 Two turtle doves. Two turtle doves. All right, so I know those three. Speaker 2 I think it’s… Is it three calling birds? French hens? Four calling birds. Speaker 1 See? Speaker 2 Three French. But now do this backwards from 12. Some ladies are dancing. Figgy pudding. Speaker 1 And then there’s people pifing. Speaker 2 People five, 12. Speaker 1 I don’t know. Piper’s piping? Piper’s piping. Lords of Leaping. Speaker 2 Lords of Leaping. And then there’s geese-a-laying. You got to do geese-a-laying. See? I don’t know what’s up with me. Speaker 1 I don’t know neither. Speaker 2 I get confused. Yeah. We actually, when I was with hospice, actually, during COVID, we actually formed, what do we call ourselves? I think the Caring Connection Carolers or whatever. And what we did was we went to the windows. It was freezing, but it was so much fun. And we went outside of the nursing homes or assisted livings and we actually sang songs. And it was really fun. And we dressed in silly costumes and hats and we danced around. It was really cool. And, yeah, and that’s how I actually I used to know the 12 Days of Christmas perfectly. But it was funny because a lot of the group, they were like, oh, let’s not do the whole 12 days. Let’s skip around. Well, we went to this one place that had memory care. And this guy was standing there going like this, like with his numbers. And we were like, okay, we can’t skip. I looked at the group. I’m like, we can’t skip because this guy is like counting down. Speaker 1 That takes like, you know, 10 minutes to sing that song. Speaker 2 Yeah. What a crazy time, COVID. I remember we had tears. We had this one guy. The next year we went inside and we had our mask on and so forth. And it was one guy’s, it was his birthday. And so we’re just messing around and we sang him happy birthday. He started crying. We had so many like doing that, like so many tears. Even when we were singing Christmas carols, people would start crying like, you know, Silent Night and stuff like that. People would get emotional. Speaker 1 Yeah. So here it is. Today is New Year’s Eve. Any plans? Any plans personally? And then tell me a little bit about what’s like at the Heights. I would imagine the ball drive. People are going to watch. You’re going to have the. Speaker 2 Yeah, she’s actually going to have the ball drop in the movie theater and then we have a screen in the lobby. But I forgot to mention too for Christmas, actually Hanukkah, which was the 18th, Christmas and New Year’s, he does an amazing buffet. I mean he did for Hanukkah, he did brisket and different things like that with the Manischewitz, I think it is. The wine? The wine, yeah. He did that. And then for Christmas, he did, I think he did lamb, asparagus. And I mean, it was like a whole menu. And then for New Year’s, he’s doing a whole big thing as well. I mean, and it’s funny because he comes to my office and he shows me this menu. Sometimes I’m running around, so I miss lunch. And I’m like, why are you showing this to me? It was like, yeah. Speaker 1 Don’t rub it in. Speaker 2 Yeah. But he does a great job. I mean, Tim, as we know, our dining manager, he does an amazing job. Dining director, he does an amazing job of putting things together. So that’s part of our New Year’s Eve. And the ball dropping. Of course. And then, you know, obviously Friday we’ll have our little social hour. And I’m sure she’ll do something, you know, funny with that. That was yesterday. Huh? Speaker 1 Friday. Speaker 2 Friday. That was yesterday. That was yesterday. Yeah. Speaker 1 So a big to-do tonight. Speaker 2 A big to-do tonight. I’m glad to hear that. Yeah. It should be amazing. Yeah. They do a great job. Speaker 1 What are you doing? You watch the ball drop? Speaker 2 My daughter is actually doing a lock-in with the church that I go to. So basically they haven’t done it in – well, my son actually, they did it with him. The teens, they have a big teen ministry. So they did it with him and he’s 30. So they did it back then. And then they stopped doing it during COVID. So she actually has never done one. And basically what they do is at 930, we drop her off at the church. She brings her sleeping bag and all this stuff. They have to stay up till midnight. And then they get to, we pick them up at 9 a.m. the next morning. And they do like lessons. They’ll have music. They’ll have games. But it’s a whole, and teens are coming from all over New England. So like Maine, Vermont, Boston. Yeah. And she goes to teen camp. So she’s got friends from all those areas. So she’s, yeah, she’s excited. How old is she? My plans are dull. That’s why I’m mentioning her plans. How old is she? She’s 13. Speaker 1 Gotcha. Speaker 2 That sounds fun for a 13-year-old. She is so excited. Yes, yes. Speaker 1 Does she have friends from all over the place too? Speaker 2 She has friends from all over because she goes to teen camp and they come from all over for teen camp. And they go to teen camp up in Maine. And it’s a sleepaway camp. It goes for seven days. Speaker 1 You think she’ll make it till midnight? Speaker 2 She will. Oh, gosh. My daughter. She’s my kid. My kids don’t like to sleep. Speaker 1 So she’ll pass out after that. She’ll have her sleeping back. I’ll make up for them. I wish I had more time for sleeping. Speaker 2 Yeah. Well, they like to sleep during the day. They don’t like to sleep at night. Speaker 1 They’re nocturnal. Speaker 2 They’re nocturnal. Both of them were. Both of them were like. Speaker 1 Typical teenage. Speaker 2 Yes. And luckily my pediatrician is very like, you know, forward thinking. So she was just like, you know what? As long as they’re able to get up in the morning, get their work done, do what they have to do, don’t, you know, force them. So they usually went to bed at like 10 o’clock. You know how people are in a family makes a big deal. Your kid’s going to bed at 10 o’clock. and they’re also on an honor roll. And your kids are what? Speaker 1 If it ain’t broke? Exactly. Speaker 2 That’s my pediatrician. Speaker 1 So my plans are boring. Speaker 2 I don’t actually know what we’re doing. I think my sister’s going to come over and we’re probably going to play games and have a nice dinner and just kind of chill. I think that’s what we’re going to do. I try to make it to midnight. I’m so old now. I usually pass it off. Speaker 1 Oh, you can do it. Come on. Speaker 2 I can do it when she’s there. When she’s there, I can do it. But when she’s not there, you know. And when you’re watching those shows with the ball dropping, those just get kind of… Speaker 1 only put that on a quarter of. I don’t watch the whole show. It’s like, all right, it’s a quarter of. I’ll watch it. And then once the ball comes down, I just turn it off. You don’t need to watch. There’s nothing else on after that. They’re not bad. Although you can watch the ball, I guess, Speaker 2 in every time zone. Yes, which is really kind of cool. I wonder how that works. And then Pacific. Exactly. So I guess I could watch it early. Pacific would be like five hours, right? Speaker 1 That’s three hours. Speaker 2 Five hours? Not five? California? Speaker 1 I think it’s three hours. Speaker 2 Yeah. Is it three hours? Speaker 1 There’s Eastern time, right? Or in the Eastern time zone. Eastern time, yeah. And then there’s Central, Mountain, and Pacific. Speaker 2 Yeah. Those are early Central and Mountain, right? Like an hour or two hours? Speaker 1 I think it’s one hour each. Okay. Each time you cross the… Speaker 2 Got it, yeah. Actually, I had an appointment the other day where someone sent it to me in Central time. So I’m sitting there at three o’clock on this appointment, and the appointment’s actually for four. Speaker 1 You know what I did one time? I was at the Hoover Dam. and I leaped. I’m like, right now it’s 1 o’clock. Too much fun. Speaker 2 I went there. 1 o’clock. Too much fun. Speaker 1 It’s 2 o’clock. Too much fun. Speaker 2 I kept doing it too. I kept on jumping over. People were getting mad at me. It was so much fun. Speaker 1 It’s simple things in light that may entertain us. Speaker 2 What’s going on over at the Heights? Lots of stuff actually. Tell me what’s new for 2023. Speaker 1 What is new for 2023? Speaker 2 I made notes. Got to look at my notes. You’re allowed. I know because there’s a lot going on. So we’re actually going to be doing a celebrity cooking competition with local celebrities. I haven’t started getting the celebrities, so don’t ask me who yet. But I’m hoping to get like Gino because I know that he cooks from UConn. Okay. I’m hoping to get some of the – Does he cook? Yeah. Speaker 1 I know he’s got a restaurant, but I don’t think he cooks at the restaurant. Speaker 2 You know, I’m making an assumption, but I’d like him to be there still. Oh, I’m sure. Speaker 1 Ask him. Speaker 2 So I’d like to get him. I’d like to get – we’re going to have the charity. So it’ll probably be for Alzheimer’s, the Connecticut Alzheimer’s Association. We’ll do that. I’m hoping to get some people from TV. You’re going to be there to host it because I’ve already asked you that once. Speaker 1 Do we have a date on that? Speaker 2 We don’t have a date on it. Okay. We’ll have to talk about it after. You’ll tell me the date because I haven’t said it yet. Whoa. But it’ll be in June. Speaker 1 Oh, in June. Speaker 2 Oh, okay. Speaker 1 I’m thinking, oh, my goodness, my January is pretty booked. Yeah. So I’m like, oh, okay, good. June is fine. Speaker 2 I am so excited. So we’ll have groups of two. Tim will all compete against Tim. And then whoever wins it, they’ll have appetizer. They’ll have the main dish. They’ll do in the dessert. And then each winner of those three sections, those will be on our menu. And we’ll have that on our menu. Yeah, I’m so excited. I’m a big foodie. Speaker 1 Are you pairing people up? Please tell me. I don’t have to cook this myself. Speaker 2 No, no, you’ll be hosting. Speaker 1 Oh, I’ll be hosting. Speaker 2 Yes, you’ll be like, hey, this is going on. Oh, look over there. So then when they’re cooking, you’ll kind of keep it flowing. All right. Yeah. Speaker 1 Even I don’t eat my cooking. No, I’m teasing. I’m sure I’m not that bad. Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. So I’m excited. I’m really excited about that. I love cooking and I think it’ll be neat. We’ll do it outside. We’ll have little stations and stuff like that. And I think it’ll be a blast. I think people – I was actually – yesterday I was watching the American Bake Off. You know how they have the great American British Bake Off? This is the American Bake Off. I’ve seen the British one. Yeah. Now they have an American one with celebrities. It’s really good. So who’s a good cook then? Who is – well, the celebrities, they weren’t like major celebrities. They were kind of like – Speaker 1 Yeah, Pacino’s not doing the Bake Off. Speaker 2 No, no, no, no. It was like a football player. I can’t even think of any of like – there was the girl that was in that – I can’t even think of the name of the show. She was in a sitcom, but it’s not. It’s like second or third. That’s how big these celebrities are. They weren’t big. Yeah, they weren’t. But you know them. Like if you see it, they’re like supporting actors and actresses. And yeah, that level of celebrity. Yeah, because when I first saw Celebrity, I was thinking like, oh, you know. Speaker 1 These are like C-level celebrities. Speaker 2 No, B-level. B? B, I would say B. Yeah, there was like a social media influencer. There was a girl from Saturday Night Live. Different people like that. But yeah, I couldn’t. I couldn’t tell you their names. All right. Yeah. But it was really neat to watch. So that’s what we’re doing for that. We’re doing a Dine and Dash in March. So that’s where you can come and grab some of our delicious food, bottle of wine for two people. But you take a tour. So it’s called a Dine and Dash. You grab the money. Dine and Dash. Grab the money. Grab the food. And then we’re doing a rock painting with For All Ages. I think we had them on last year. We had them on our podcast. So that nonprofit organization, we’re doing a rock painting. And they’re basically the teens are going to come in and paint rocks with our seniors. And then we’re going to take those rocks and put them around Hartford and West Hartford. And when someone sees one, they can take a picture of themselves on Facebook. They’ll be inspirational. Nice. So we’re doing that. We’re starting our memory cafe. Speaker 1 We talked about that last week. Speaker 2 Yeah. It’s going to start. The first one’s going to be a drum circle. And then we’re also going to have a wonderful Irish singer for March is coming in. And then in April, we’re doing the gentleman from the People Plant Connection. And he’s going to come in and he’s going to do a planting activity for April. And then for February, we’re doing a Valentine’s activity. And so this is where the caregiver and the person that has Alzheimer’s or dementia or a memory challenge can come in. It’s totally free. They have some nice refreshments and some, you know, some nice food and they can sit for a free activity. And it just, you know, a lot of times people can’t get out when they, you know, when they’re taking care of someone. It’s a lot. And in this environment, you know, they can, you know, they can enjoy them. Speaker 1 Totally action-packed, my friends. Yes. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter of production of The Heights at Avery Heights. Yep. Along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Talk to me about these podcasts that you’ve got coming up in 2023. Speaker 2 So, back to the notes. So, we have some really cool stuff. So, our next show, I’m going to be talking about healthy resolutions for older adults and why they work. I truly believe, as you know, never stop setting goals. Just because you’re older, that doesn’t mean you’re done. So that’s important as well. Good point. Yep. We’re going to have Kathy Frieda from Sage Solutions on. She’s a geriatric care manager. She’s going to be on pretty frequent next year. So she’s going to come in and talk about all sorts of fun topics. Her topic for in a couple of weeks is going to be solo agers. I don’t even know what that means. But we’re going to find out. We’re going to find out. Something to look forward to. On January 10th. All right. Listen in. All right. Cool. Yeah, she’s amazing. She just sent out – she sends out these newsletters that are just – the last one she sent out, it had a test to see how purposeful you are, how driven you are. And I took the test. I actually scored pretty decent. Not great, but decent. I could see that. Decent. You’re pretty good. So she’s amazing. We love working with her. We’re going to be talking about how to pay for senior living services. So, yep. That’s a great one. We’re going more in depth. We’ve kind of like gone around the fringe on that more in depth because I think that’s important. We’re going to have more incredible people on our series called Living Your Next Chapter, Life on Purpose. So we’re going to have a gentleman who’s a photographer who goes all around the world. And he started in his 60s or 70s. And he takes amazing, like, breathtaking photos. And he just goes around, like, Alaska, like, all around the country, all around. And he takes these beautiful photos. And he shares them. He comes back and shares them. Is he published? He is, yeah. So he’ll come back and talk to us, which is fun. We’re going to have a barbershop quartet on. Yep. Yep. Which you can participate in. Speaker 1 You don’t want to hear me sing. Speaker 2 Doobie doobie doo. Speaker 1 I can do that. Speaker 2 You can’t do acapella? Speaker 1 I can barely speak. You want me to sing? Right. Speaker 2 The 12 days of Christmas. You couldn’t even do it. Speaker 1 When I sing, the glass shatters. That’s how terrible. That’s not a bad thing, right? Because that. Oh, that means you hit a high note. Right. Is that what you do? That’s me when I step on a tack in this room. Yes. Is there anyone that you’re looking forward to the most or maybe a couple? The Barbershop Cooker Tent. Speaker 2 I love stuff like that. I love stuff like that, believe it or not. I love like acapella stuff. That’s going to be really good. That’s tough. And they’re actually going to be coming to the Heights as well to perform for our residents. So what we’re trying to do is kind of get the folks on, on the podcast, you know, living your next chapter, and then have them come to the community and kind of encourage our older adults to kind of keep going. You know, this is, you know, it’s your journey. You’re still here, you know, so you got to keep living. That’s what that whole series is about, is older adults who have kind of taken on that next chapter and really taken it seriously. We’re also going to hopefully have a gentleman on that started his own food truck business. And he retired. He started in his 60s. And he was his son. And he goes all over. And I know it’s like a simple thing, but that’s so cool. Like I actually, that’s one of my retirement goals is to have a food truck and to go around. Speaker 1 What would be yours? Speaker 2 I don’t know. My husband and I have been talking about a couple of different things. Something definitely with chicken. But then we’d also do breakfast too. We do like breakfast sandwiches and stuff like that. And then we do lunch. Just breakfast and lunch we do. And then every once in a while we do a pop-up restaurant where we’d have dinner and stuff like that. But I love to cook. I love to cook. Speaker 1 I would do ice cream. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Right? Oh, with the little music? Speaker 1 Oh, like an ice cream. Whatever. Whatever. I don’t even care about music. I just love ice cream. I eat ice cream on the coldest day of the year. It doesn’t matter. Yeah. I got a cup. I mean, you want to talk about fattening. It goes right. I might not even eat it. I’m about to just put it right there. From the lips to the hips, right? From the lips. You got that right. Just like I can drink a hot piping cup of coffee on the hottest day of the year. I don’t drink iced coffee. I don’t even like iced coffee. I will drink hot coffee when it’s 95 out and the humidity is to the point where my hair looks scary. I become Scary Gary. Hey. Speaker 2 For Christmas, I got my daughter a – well, it’s supposed to be a hot chocolate maker. But it turns out you can do steamed milk in that as well. And so last night, I made my husband a macchiato. Yeah. Yeah. A macchiato. I was just thinking. So cool with the foam. And then I put the whipped cream. And then I took some cocoa powder and sprinkled it on there. Speaker 1 Boy, you are a creative. Right? In the kitchen here. Look at you. Speaker 2 I know. I love it. I love to cook. I love to decorate the house and host people. And then we’re going to be talking about grief as well. So we’re definitely going to be talking. We have a couple of people coming on. this awesome book to teach people how to deal with people when they’re grieving. We actually read it when I was at the hospice company, and it’s called Don’t Sing Songs to a Heavy Heart. And it’s how to relate to the people when they’re suffering. So not the platitudes, not the he’s in a better place, or the person’s not suffering. We all go to those, but a lot of times when someone passes, that actually makes it worse for people. And this gentleman is amazing. He has a whole ministry where he teaches people how to deal with people when they’re grieving. And it takes thought. Like you have to like pause yourself because you want to just give those. Like I said, he’s in a better place. He’s not suffering anymore. At least in the end, he wasn’t in pain. You know, all these things that some reason he took a poll and he did all this research and he found out that this wasn’t comforting people. Speaker 1 You know, we could all learn from that one. What about the Living Your Next Chapter, Life on Purpose series? Speaker 2 Yes. So that’s what we were just talking about. So different people we’re going to have in. So we’re also going to have an author. She wrote a book called Oh Hello Alzheimer’s. And that was a book that she wrote. Her husband actually got Alzheimer’s. And she wrote a book. Speaker 1 Did she send me the book? Speaker 2 She sent you the book. So yeah, it’s a big book. Speaker 1 I got this book one day and I’m like, I don’t know who’s sending me a book. And why are they sending me this book? So I put it off to the side. Actually, it’s on my desk right now. Speaker 2 So she’s not going to be on until February. All right. Yeah, but it’s neat. She wrote a whole book to help people kind of. And it’s neat because she talks about the journey too, the different stages. And she talks about what happens in these different stages. Because with Alzheimer’s, there’s different. Obviously, unfortunately, you’re declining. And so she talks about, goes in depth with her thoughts of what she experienced through those different stages. So she’s going to be on. We’ve got some good stuff. And we also have our own Harvest Healthcare. It’s the company that we use. They’re out in Avon, and they’re the people that come in and do our Jerry Psych work. So those are the folks that come in and work with our people that have Alzheimer’s and dementia. And they actually help to take care of them. So I figured we’d have them in as well because to me it’s important, you know, in talking about the Heights, that people have a full understanding of all the people that we work with, all of our vendors, and kind of get to know them on a different level. Speaker 1 It’s incredible. I can’t believe – I shouldn’t even be surprised knowing you. You’re busy. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 I mean, and the Heights – This is exciting. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 This is full. This is a full. You just went over the next half a year. I know. Speaker 2 Yeah. We just actually hired a wonderful lady, Anna. She met her. She was in here a couple weeks ago. She’s wonderful. And she has just taken this show to a whole incredible level, which I’m really excited about. I’ve never had it booked like this far out. And so it’s exciting. And it’s important. You know, this show is all about giving seniors the information that they need. Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly. Now, the Heights, she’s the Heights, hold on, Senior Living Specialist. Yeah, yeah. Did I get that right? Yes. Thanks. Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. And those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care and a whole lot more. You got to visit AveryHeights.org, A-V-E-R-Y Heights.org, or call them for a tour. And the beauty of this tour is there’s no pressure. Just say you want a tour. They don’t whip anything under your nose and say, here’s a pen. Just say you want the tour. You want to take it all in and observe. You’re going to find a lot of happy people. Write this number down. 860-953-1201. I’ll give it to you one more time. 860-953-1201 to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thank you so much for listening. Until next weekend, Happy New Year, and have a good one, everybody. 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What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community. Expert Katie Krupka from Tucked In Elder Care gives valuable information and guidance. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 So, welcome to Your Next Chapter. My name is Siobhan Mattingly. I am the Senior Living Specialist, and it’s great to be here this morning. Speaker 1 Your Next Chapter is all about connecting you with resources, friends, and opportunities for older adults, not just for quality of life, but for living life. And I’m so happy today to be here with Jim. Jim is an amazing author, screenwriter, and a whole host of other things. Speaker 1 And I love his philosophies and insight. I think in some way we’re kindred spirits because there’s a lot of philosophies and stuff that you mentioned in your book, as well as on your website that I can certainly relate to. But we’ll start off. Tell me a little bit about you. Speaker 2 OK, I’ll start back from the beginning. I was born on a different planet. I was born in Coral Gables, Florida and raised before air conditioning. Speaker 1 Oh, just think about it. Speaker 2 And all of our friends there at Avery Heights, there are many of them that grew up without air conditioning. Speaker 1 But I lived in South Florida. With the cool bands, though, the metal ones that make that really cool noise, right? Speaker 2 Yeah, I had a little fan about this big, about a foot and a half from my head every night sitting on a chair blowing on me. And that was it. That was staying cool. Speaker 2 You know, we didn’t worry about it. Nobody had air conditioning. Only people who had, remember how huge that amount of money would be. Speaker 2 They say, he has a million dollars. And there was one house in a four block area. And Coral Gables was a wealthy suburb. Speaker 2 And there was one house that had one air conditioner ski out of one. Speaker 1 That’s like cable and color TV, right? Speaker 2 Yeah. I mean, only movie theaters were air conditioned, not even restaurants. Speaker 1 But you probably didn’t miss it, though. know how could we miss it exactly know it it’s just we didn’t know it that was life yeah that Speaker 2 was life that’s what you live with um then i over the years i went to university of florida two years and i i transferred to michigan state university to get a degree in communications only two schools in 1955 offered a degree in communications wow now every roadside garage and chapel offers it Speaker 1 but I graduated with a degree in communications I worked hard did you I know so did I but so I Speaker 2 went to MSU which we called MSMU it was the first agricultural college in America and I saw snow for the first time when I was 20 years old oh wow which was fun kind of cool um then I grew up I was married and had two young children 19 months apart my my babies are now 61 and 63 i by the way folks i’m 88 but it doesn’t matter i have no plans for waking up on the wrong side of the grass anytime soon okay so you know anyway um i worked my way up from the from below the bottom of the ladder to a corner office job in New York. I was, I don’t know whether anybody saw, it was kind of a silly TV series called Mad Men. Speaker 1 Oh, yes, yes. Speaker 2 Well, that was basically the story of my life. I was much better behaved. I mean, no, my office was not a place Speaker 1 Waters for closers, right? Speaker 2 Not for a place for parties or sex. It was a place to work. I was a nice, very proper married man that I didn’t fool around in New York, but I worked in New York. That was my life. And I was always in New York City, except in 1971, I went home and told my nine and 11 year old daughters, I said, pack, we’re moving. And they said, oh, good daddy. Where are we moving? I said, Buenos Aires, Argentina. I said, where is that dad? I said, 6,500 miles away. And I, I went there to be creative director of J. Walter Thompson. Speaker 2 Wow. And we were there for four years playing with the Peronistas. It was very interesting. Speaker 1 Nice, though. Yeah, yeah. Speaker 2 So other than that, I’ve been at age 45, 46, around there, 47, when I was at the top of the mountain in advertising and had a very good life. I left it. I jumped off totally unplanned and bought an abandoned stack of stone up here in the boonies of New York State and opened a country and conference center. Completely stupid thing to do, giving up a very high level executive job, very well paid for no money in a business I didn’t know. Speaker 2 But I thought, even though I won’t gamble on a $10, I won’t bet $10 on a football game because I have no control of it. Here we gambled. We put everything we had into a business that I didn’t understand. Speaker 2 And I worked 70 hours a week. And guess what? It became successful. Speaker 1 Nice. There you go. So you took a risk on you, really. Speaker 2 It was called crap shooting with your life. But hey, so was Argentina. And that also worked. Speaker 1 Nice. Nice. Speaker 2 I mean, I think you do that. Speaker 1 Yes, you have to. Speaker 2 And now I live in the same town where that country inn is. It’s actually buried in trees across the street. I don’t see it, fortunately. And home is an art-filled 1940 dairy barn converted to a house. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 I have an interior pool in my house. Speaker 1 Really? Speaker 2 That’s something I’ve done for the last 30 years. I decided having a pool in New York state means you only really get to use it about two months a year. It’s either too hot, too cold, too buggy. Oh, look, there’s a wounded deer in the pool. So I thought to hell with it. Speaker 2 So we’ve had interior pools for at least 30 years. Really? And it’s wonderful. Speaker 2 So when it’s 10 degrees outside and there’s a foot of snow at eight o’clock in the morning or seven 30, as it was this morning, I’m in the pool doing my morning exercises. Speaker 1 Wow. Speaker 2 30 minutes a day, every morning. Speaker 1 I love it. Speaker 2 And friends, I am talking to friends in Avery Heights, right? Yes. Speaker 1 Well, friends throughout older adults. Speaker 2 Good. Speaker 1 Friends. Speaker 2 You know, part of aging gracefully or not minding aging, you know, if God is good enough to you that he doesn’t give you something you can’t control, We can’t always control illness or the unexplained tumor or something dreadful. If you have just normal aging aspects of life, then you should really work on taking care of yourself. I take care of myself. Speaker 2 I weigh 10 pounds less than I weighed at the end of basic training in the army. I have two meals a day, all fruit for breakfast, and then a big full dinner around four o’clock in the afternoon. and and then I do 30 minutes of exercise every morning and if you don’t have a pool do it yourself yep take a room in your do something to keep your your body moving and of course you you know be careful what you eat and you don’t drink and god knows you don’t smoke if you smoke I’ll come over there and slap you I mean so you don’t do that and you take care yourself. And I went in to see my doctor recently for a physical, and he looked at me and he said, he’s a very cold hearted guy. He’s been by doctor for 40 years. He looks up and he said, my most boring patient, there’s nothing wrong with you. And I’m lying. I’m not 88. I won’t be 88 for six more weeks. In September, I’ll be 88. But there’s nothing wrong with me. Speaker 2 Nice. You know, and he said, get used to it. You may live through 100. My children say, oh, God. Speaker 1 We have a few hundred-year-olds, centurions, I think they call it. Speaker 2 I think it’s centenarians. Speaker 1 Centenarians, thank you. Speaker 2 Actually, I went to a workshop in March and Dan Buettner, who wrote all the Blue Zones books. Speaker 1 Yes, love him. Speaker 2 Dan was the guest host and he’s become a good friend of mine. Speaker 1 Really? Speaker 2 And the subject was longevity. And I can do a whole talk on Blue Zones. I love Blue Zones. Someday we’ll do that in the future, Siobhan. Siobhan, I’m sorry, Siobhan, right? Speaker 1 Yes, Siobhan. Speaker 2 Siobhan, Siobhan. Speaker 1 Pardon me, I should know that. Speaker 2 I’m Irish. Speaker 1 Siobhan’s fine. Siobhan’s fine. Siobhan’s my nickname. Speaker 2 No, I like Siobhan. Okay. So life is good. So now I write. I write full time. I wrote two fiction novels, pure fiction, which could be very interesting TV series or films if I could ever find an agent to sell them. Speaker 2 I’ve written two nonfiction books that I know you want to talk about the first one today, Dear All Friends, which I’m very fond of. And then my more recent one is called Embrace Your Age. This is the most recent one. Embrace Your Age. You can be better than ever. Speaker 2 I’ve also written a TV series that’s ready to be produced if somebody would look at it. It’s about a newscasting show and it’s called The Seniors Old Enough to Know Better. oh wow uh um i’m working on a screenplay i have a new novel underway you know idle fingers are the devil’s playground so i’m yes i’m over busy but that’s okay yeah that’s all right that’s all right and i’m happy to be here with you all today let me see is there anything else i’m leaving out about myself no we’ll we’ll get to the rest of it as we chat so tell me um i like i said i feel like we’re Speaker 1 definitely connected uh many things i read in your bio and even just now you’re talking about you know uh bachelor’s degree in communications my birthday’s in august so you’re a virgo my so there’s lots of things but what i love is your um definitely your life philosophy and my favorite piece of it was when you talked about this just hit home making your bed I saw this um on YouTube actually uh the Admiral I saw him Admiral any wonderful McRaven every morning I make my bed and there are mornings where I’m like but but it does it just feels there’s something about it that makes you feel like I’ve started my day it empowers you and and I love the fact that it’s like the one thing that you can do. And it’s just, it’s perfect. And when you even when you walk in the room, and you’re getting dressed, you see it all made, it just feels right. And so talk about your life Speaker 2 philosophy a little bit. You take something messy and make it neat. Yeah, starting your you’re starting your day that way. I’m gonna make whatever’s messy out there. I’m gonna need it up. Speaker 2 Yes, what you can control. I love that. And it’s good. I think part of that came from I’m gonna back up for one second. I say without any shame or guilt, because my father died, unfortunately, when I was very young. He was the district attorney of the city of Miami. And he died in a one-week period because of a hospital error in 1950. Hospitals weren’t always that smart. Speaker 2 And I had no older siblings, and we had no relatives living nearby. So I was raised by, Fortunately, a wonderful brilliant woman, my mother. So I say without guilt or shame, I’m a mama’s boy. Speaker 1 Nice. Speaker 2 Because she gave me a lot of, well, my whole point of view in life, I realize, comes from her. I can still hear her voice. You can never be too clean. If you can see what you’re wearing, you’re not standing or walking correctly. Speaker 1 I like that one. Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, it was very funny. And, okay, my, I’m going to, I’m actually going to read one paragraph from dear old friends, which you want to discuss today, which leads into my philosophy. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 I know, and all my ageless friends know, that although you can’t stop the aging process, you sure as hell can go right on living. up to the last second you can still create still produce still influence still teach still love and instill love yeah you know and that’s what i try to do i if i can condense my point of view it’s it’s never too late to make your life and the lives of those around you better, happier, and more satisfying. Now, I know it may sound a bit Pollyanna-ish, but I do it. Thanks, mom. She said, every morning when you get up, every morning of your life, you’re going to have to face your most severe critic, the highest wall you have to hurdle, the most difficult person you’re going to know. It’s that person in your bathroom mirror. Speaker 2 And you either can look at that person every morning and go, good God, another day. Or smile sweetly and bravely at that person and say, good God, another day. Another chance to see, to hear, to taste, to smell, to touch, to give love, to help others. Speaker 2 It’s called another opportunity to embrace life. Hey, friends, there’s no guarantees about tomorrow. And the past ended last night. Speaker 2 Yep. As I often say to groups, because I’m I’m giving weekly lectures to another group, just like you nice people at Avery Heights. Yes. Right now. And I say to every week when I go, I say, remember what I say. Speaker 2 Right. This very minute as we are talking right this very moment, you are the oldest you’ve ever been. Yes. And you are the youngest you will ever be. Speaker 2 Yep. So basically, we’re starting life over right now. Yeah, right now. You can’t go all the way back and restart the beginning. But you can start right now and change the ending. Yes, I agree. Speaker 1 It’s funny you mentioned that quote. I highlighted that. Oh, good. Yeah. Speaker 2 It’s one I remind myself every day. Why don’t go ahead and give you just so just for folks, Speaker 1 Give your website just so people know where they can get a lot of this information. Speaker 2 Okay. I’ll hold this up so you can see my name again because the website is, you know, just www.jamesbflaherty.com. It’s an Irish name. Speaker 2 It was originally when they arrived at Ellis Island, it was the old Flaherty’s and the old Brian’s and the old Kelly’s and the old Rourke’s. And they said, sure, and if we’d be dropping the O, no one would be knowing that we’re immigrants. Actually, one of my daughters who lives in England went back to the historic name. Besides the fact that she has a very Irish first name, which a name that I gave her 61 years ago when nobody had that name. Speaker 2 I named her Shannon. Oh, nice. And she, so she is legally Shannon O. Flaherty. Yeah. You know, and when she was older, she said, I love my name, daddy. Where did you get it? And I said, I named you after a duty free liquor airport. And she said, thank you very much. Speaker 1 That’s awesome. That’s awesome. Oh, okay. Hold on. Yeah, good. All right. Well, Speaker 2 while she’s gone, we can talk. We can talk about other things then. Oh, let’s see now. Speaker 1 All right, I’m back. So why don’t we talk about your book? Okay. Why don’t you hold up that cover Speaker 2 and let’s talk about it. Here’s the book we’re talking about today. Dear old friends, stay young, stop thinking old, and love your life every day. Okay. I’m going to show you something that most people that you don’t know either. Speaker 2 When I originally published the book, it had a different subtitle. I did that. I finally said, okay, I better get more commercial and make the subtitle more to the point so people understand. Speaker 2 The original subtitle, remember I’m a writer. So writers get, we get involved with the poetry of language. And here was a poster I had for it. Speaker 2 And the original subtitle says, a loving reminder, The band won’t stop playing till you stop dancing. Speaker 1 Oh, I like that, though. Speaker 2 I know. I like it better as a writer. The writer in me is much happier with it. Speaker 1 Well, you know what? You can always introduce that now later. Speaker 2 So like, yeah, I still use it as a when I’m talking to people. I like giving lectures because it’s something I said years ago. And I and I makes me happy. Speaker 2 Like George Bernard Shaw, who had a lot of wonderful quotes. George Bernard Shaw said, you don’t stop playing because you get old. You get old because you stop playing. Speaker 1 Yes, I saw that on your site. Speaker 2 I like that. Speaker 1 Yes. Speaker 2 That’s very true. Speaker 1 We need stuff like that. We need inspiring and encouraging. Your website is, I was like, you know, talk about a rabbit hole. Speaker 1 I mean, and the one thing I thought about you when I was looking at your website, reading parts of your book is wisdom. Like, I truly believe that older adults and that’s why our thing is your next chapter is because I truly believe and we truly believe that, like you said, unless you’re, you know, you stop dancing, you know, you’ve got more to give. And you’re full of wisdom, which I really love. Speaker 1 And I love the gentle way you approach your audience as well. You’re not coming from way up here. You’re coming from right here. Speaker 1 And you’re speaking to them, you know, like your book as friends. Speaker 2 Well, I’m one of them. Although if we go back to dear old friends, I know we’re jumping around a little bit. It’s okay. Speaker 1 We’re still on the same subject. We’re in the same vein. Speaker 2 Right. Right, right. To talk about, dear old friend, why did I write it? My whole life, and to this day, I’m not sure why, because I was not, I look back at myself at 14, 15, 16, and I was not a star of, wow, look at that brilliant kid, you know, and I didn’t, I wasn’t the captain of the football team or the president of the class. I was good old Jimmy. I was Jimmy because my father was Jim. And everybody knew me and liked me, but I wasn’t number one in popularity. I was a very good kid. We were all good kids, of course. There was no such thing as drugs. Nobody had sex in high school. No, but you know, I remember people say, we saw Dan and he was smoking a cigarette and everybody was shocked. That was shocking in high school in Carl Gable, Florida. Granted, I wasn’t growing up in New York City. I was growing up in a beautiful, soft suburban town of about 3,000 people back then. Speaker 2 And there weren’t multi-trillionaire sports stars with mansions and yachts around. It was just a nice growing up town. But got off the subject there. Speaker 2 Oh, I know, I know. Anyway, I was talking about why did I have old friends? I know you said you wanted me at one point to talk about the one, the first one I mentioned in the book was Jane Prettyman. And I had heard about her before I, when I entered high school, she taught sophomore biology and everybody said, she’s very interesting, but really tough. And when we met Jane, she was probably an, a wretchedly old woman of about 45, you know, and, and she said, I want you to know that if you can make a B in my course, you’ll make a B in college biology. And she was right. She was that good, that advanced a teacher back then. And I remember she was funny as hell. She wore test hats. She’d come in for a test and she’d have an inverted, like a Chinese coolie hat on with pigtails down to her ankles. Or once she wore a gorilla mask in the class. She was amazingly, she kept our attention always glued to her. One day she, after my father died, and that was a picture in the front page of the Miami Herald because it was so well known. She called me because shortly after that, I was in her class. And she said, Jim, do you need any, would you like to earn a little money after school? I have some chores to be done around my house. And I said, oh, yes, ma’am, I’d really like that. So I came over and she would give me silver to polish or I could wash her car. She had a big Lincoln Continental with a spare tire on the rear end. Speaker 2 and and we would talk and it turned out she’d actually dated my father before he met my mother but she was a wonderful woman and and i was sitting there one day in the hot florida day moaning about my poor life being fatherless at age 14 and a half or whatever i was yeah and she said, I know losing your father was a great loss for you, Jimson, but your mother’s loss is much greater. She’s lost her lover. Now, you have to understand, I was a bit of a prude. I still am a bit of a prude, surprisingly. I don’t always admit it. And I remember kind of being shocked by that but then she explained Jane helped me understand the importance of relationships and and long-term commitments and things back then and I was 14 15 and a and a very young 14 15 I wasn’t like 15 going on 20 no I was 15 I was 15 going on 13 you know and then I realized Thinking back, I had a lot of, not a lot, but I had two or three other, like a couple of neighbors that were in their 40s and 50s that were, I guess, very fond of me or they saw something in me. Speaker 2 As I got older, my friends got older. When I was in my 20s, I had 50-year-old friends. When I was in my 30s, I had a lot of friends in their 60s. Speaker 1 Wow. Speaker 2 And in the 40s, I had a lot of friends in their 70s. Yeah. You know, and it was not, and it was wonderful. They pushed, they criticized, they complained, they say, turn left, turn right, don’t do that. Speaker 2 How can anyone be that stupid? Or that’s amazing you did that. I’m proud of you. Speaker 2 And the net net was they made it good to be Jim. Because I listened to them because I thought, damn. they’re wiser than I am yeah yeah they they’ve been there you know I’m I’m still and I still felt like a kid when I was in I actually had worked my way up I was in a corner office job in Manhattan when I was 33 years old wow you know that was a big deal I you know and it’s funny growing up growing up in the 40s and 50s, big money wasn’t something you knew about. Speaker 2 All of our kids, I’m talking to all my friends out there and Avery and our friends online that are listening to us, all of we are from a different generation. Remember, without social media, without television, nobody really knew everything at once. You know, now the kids, unfortunately, I think, know too much and they are bombarded with too much. Speaker 2 And so therefore they are concerned about the world situation and climate control and politics. And maybe life was simpler and easier back then because you went to school to learn reading, writing and arithmetic and you pledged the flag in the morning. You know, I mean, it was a very normal. Speaker 2 God-fearing, one-nation-under-God-under-flagged upbringing, which I’m glad that I had. And I’m glad my children came along early enough that they had that more than not, even though they had a crazy-ass father who dragged them 6,500 miles to Argentina and made them live in English and Spanish. and to this day they they still are fluent in spanish that’s we all are after when we got there i said after a year when you all speak spanish well enough i mean we’re going to take a vacation and go around the continent which we did we climbed over the rocks of machu picchu and we scrambled the equator and we did all those things wonderful you know and it gave them an international Speaker 1 point of view, which I like. Jim, tell me about, summarize the book, and then tell me why, as an Speaker 2 old book, I should read the book. Let’s go back to the book. I wrote the book. I realized one day when I was 42 years old, so friends, that was 86 years of 46 years ago, 46 years ago, how much I loved my old friends, how much I absolutely adored them. And this book is dedicated to the Traynums, Carl and Honor Traynum. And I sat down one day, not writing a book, I sat down to write a love letter to my friends. And it went on and on and on. And suddenly I looked at it and it was 60 pages long. And I read it and I smiled. I said, that’s lovely. Knowing I couldn’t send anybody a 60 page letter. I thought, isn’t that sweet? And I filed it. Speaker 2 And then life got busy and I forgot it. And about three years ago, cleaning my office, I found that file and I got it out and I read it again, smiling. And I thought, hot damn, my attitude hasn’t really changed, except there’s a big change. I’m one of them. I’m a dear old friend now. And that’s why I can talk about this subject because at my age, I don’t look at everything from the standpoint of the 42 year old. Yeah. You know, I have a more realistic viewpoint of what happens to you, you are going to get older, a matter of how, how well are you going to cope with it. And so when I found it, I thought, and I didn’t have any plans to write any nonfiction books, because I was really deep into writing novels in those days. I thought it was great, Great fun to write a novel. Speaker 2 I’ll get into that later because it’s very exciting when you write a novel. You become those people. You have to speak their language and walk their walk and do everything. Speaker 2 But I thought, I wonder if I could just update Dear Old Friends, add a few comments, but keep much of the basic thinking in it. And I wrote this book. And I kept the same title because I had written on it Dear Old Friends as a title. Speaker 1 Mainly because your friends, you were always younger and they were older. Speaker 2 Oh, they were always older. Much, much, much older. I’ve lost all those old friends, of course. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 You know, because they’re good. I know I quote there in one of my old friends, Ruth West. She was an ancient hag, probably about 80. Speaker 2 Then a wonderful, wonderful woman. And she said, you don’t put an age on people, do you, Jim? And I said, no, I really don’t. You know, even now I mentor high school seniors now and then. Speaker 2 I go and talk to them about what’s ahead for them and why I want them to shape up or ship out. I’m not the easiest human being in the world. You know, my children said you were everything, but you didn’t make a salute. Speaker 2 But that was about all. Speaker 1 Now, who’s your favorite? Who’s your favorite old friend? Speaker 2 Oh, it’s very hard because there were so many. I’ll say Carl and Honor Trainham. So one day I found, this was this unplanned event in my life, when I found an abandoned stack of stone here in Armenia, New York, where I live, which is, we call it anemia or amnesia. Speaker 2 But it’s right on the Connecticut border. We’re right next door to Sharon, Connecticut. So if you go to the northwest corner of Connecticut and you see beautiful villages like Sharon, Lakeville, and Salisbury. Speaker 2 And we’re right one mile from the border of Sharon. Speaker 1 Wow. Speaker 2 But Emenia is kind of a blue collar town. It’s a boonies town. On the other side of us is Millbrook, New York, which is money and rich and all mansions. Speaker 2 There is a very rich part of Emenia, however, buried in the woods. And I found this abandoned stack of English stone full of raccoon droppings. no functioning anything no utilities the grounds and gardens over and I fell in love with it and bought it and the owner somebody I had never met of course and his lawyer made some stupid things and I at one point called my lawyer in New York and said cancel it and he said but Jim I know you love this place I said cancel it the people are idiots and I can’t be pushed I get to a point when I say no they’ll they’ll i said something a new window will open a new door will open there’s always something new out out there if your mind is open to it right yes so he called he canceled it and the next day he called me and he said there’s a gentleman in my office who would like to meet you and i said what i mean stanley never did this the attorney i was working in new york and i said fine. So he came over with this sweet looking white haired gentleman sat down, Carl Trainham, and his wife was Amy Einstein Spengarn, who was a daughter of the owners, Joel and Amy Spengarn, a very wealthy, very liberal, highly intellectual Jewish family from Manhattan. Speaker 2 Wow. Joel was the first Jewish professor at Columbia University and was also, by the way, I know I’m stepping away from the basic story of Carl. Joel wrote a letter. He was a very influential liberal and he wrote a letter one day and I saw the original. Here is the beginning of the black movement in America. A letter that said, I have a dream of a unified colored republic. Speaker 2 And Martin Luther King said, hey, catchy phrase, and made that the slogan for Black America. And Joel used to invite all of the leading Black scholars in America to Troutbeck, and they formed NAACP right there across the street. And he was one of the officers of it. Speaker 2 So the House had a very interesting liberal history. Anyway, Carl came in. Carl Tranum came into my office that day. Speaker 2 He and Honor had been married on the front lawn of Trump when I knew them better. And he said, tell me what happened. So I told him the story of the back and forth. Speaker 2 And he said, well, no wonder you were angry. He said, do you mind? Just a slight sound of his Tennessee boyhood. Speaker 2 Not much. He was too educated to keep that accent. He said, do you mind if I make a telephone call, if I can set the deal back on the right track, would you still go ahead with it? Speaker 2 And I said, certainly. And in that soft way, he said, yeah, you idiots. I can hear it. Speaker 2 He very sweetly told the lawyer and his son, who at that point was the owner. And the deal went through and I bought the stack of stone. Oh, what did you do with it? Speaker 2 I turned it into a, I kept the original name of it, Troutbeck, Troutbeck, which is the name of a village in the Lake District of England. And I opened a country and conference center. Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Yeah. Speaker 2 And I worked 70 hours a week and it was successful. And I owned it for 30 years. And then God was good to me in 2016 before COVID came around and said, Jim, even though you’re an idiot, I think in your 80 years old and you really shouldn’t be working like that. Sell it. And I sold it. Speaker 1 I was going to ask you because you mentioned it earlier and I was going to ask you. Speaker 2 Well, it’s very much a part of my life. I mean, that was 30 years of my life. And for the first for the first 15 years of that to build a business, I was there 70 hours a week. Speaker 1 Wow. Speaker 2 And then I could back away from it. We started traveling and we had a villa in Acapulco. I mean, life was good. Speaker 2 Jim has not suffered. Jim had nothing. Another thing, you know, people say, oh, Jim, you must have had a trust fund or something. Speaker 2 Jim had nothing. Speaker 1 Wow. Jim worked. Speaker 2 Noel Coward, who’s a wonderful British wag, an actor and a writer, had a wonderful line years ago that I totally embraced heart and soul, and I still do at my advanced age, work is more fun than fun. Speaker 1 Yes, yeah. Speaker 2 And I loved it. How long can you float around a pool with a margarita in your hand? I can do that for 30 minutes. Speaker 2 I did it now and then. But I held with it. I don’t do that anymore. Speaker 2 Anyway, Carl and his wife, Honor, became my best friends. My mother said she was jealous until she met them. She said that I understood because they were exactly the age of my parents. Speaker 2 And they lived in St. Thomas in the Virgin Islands. And I miss them so much that we went down and bought a home on top of a mountain in St. Thomas. And I lived there for 10 years. Speaker 2 Not full time. I would go down for two weeks at a time, three weeks at a time. But they were very, very dear. Speaker 1 You really lived an amazing life. So what’s next for you? What’s next for you? Speaker 2 Well, you know, as I say on the line under my name on the next book, The Embrace Your Age, I say an optimistic octogenarian with a bright future. I think it would be easier to get the Pope to come to Armenia to bless dinner than to get a literary agent these days. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 You know, especially at my age. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Okay. I’ve been invited to give a TED Talk in October. I heard that. Which TEDx Talk, not TED Talk, TEDx Talk. Speaker 1 Where is that? Whereabouts? Speaker 2 I’m going to be giving it in a suburb of Seattle. Speaker 1 Wow. Speaker 2 So I’ve got to fly out to Seattle and. Speaker 1 Good for you. Speaker 2 Which is fine. Yeah. Because it adds credibility to me. Speaker 2 So if I go to an agent and say, hey, I’m a TEDx speaker and I have got all these properties, at least look at them for God’s sake. So I can get somebody to look at it. Who knows? Speaker 2 Maybe I’ll have a TV series on air. I would like to do that. Yeah. Speaker 2 You know, it’s not a matter. You know, I confess I should feel guilty about it, but I don’t. I’m not the young, starving writer huddled in a dirty garret somewhere writing. No, I’m a very comfortable elderly gentleman in his art-filled barn with a pool. Speaker 2 And I made a very smart decision 23 years ago that all of my friends are wildly, wildly envious. And I said, you were idiots. Some of you, because you could have made that decision and you were too stingy or too stupid to do it. Speaker 2 I hired a woman, a darling woman from Mexico, who is now an American citizen. So we go to vote together. And when I was very sick after bad surgery in Mexico, she came in and took care of me. Speaker 2 And I started calling her the nanny. And to this day, Esther Lopez Hernandez is her name. And more common sense than anyone I’ve ever known. Speaker 2 She’s with me 23 years later, still with me. And she introduces herself to people. She said, hello, I am Senor Jim’s nanny. Speaker 2 And everybody says, can we come to dinner, Senor Jim? Because the food is brilliant. I told the hospital, I’m very close to Sharon Hospital, Sharon, Connecticut. Speaker 2 I said, if you run out of OR space, you can always come to our house because it’s that clean all the time. Good for you. But so it’s good. Speaker 2 Life is good. Speaker 1 It’s been amazing to chat with you. Hold up the book, the one we were talking about, Dear Old Friends. And tell us, where do you find that? Where do you find the book? Speaker 2 You can find all of my books on Amazon under my name. You go to, you know, books and go to Amazon.com and look for James Flaherty, F-L-A-H-E-R-T-Y, James B. Flaherty. And you either look for Dear Old Friends or Embrace Your Age. You can find those books. Speaker 1 I don’t know. Speaker 2 Do we have any more time or do you want to do anything else? Speaker 1 I think we’re good. We’re at the end. Speaker 2 Oh, we are. Oh, OK. Speaker 1 We’re definitely going to have you back. I definitely want to talk about Embrace Your Age next time. Okay. Speaker 1 I’m like sitting here like in awe. I’ve got all sorts of stuff highlighted and all sorts of notes. Thank you so much. Speaker 1 The wisdom that you have in life is contagious, and I appreciate it. Speaker 2 My pleasure. Remember, friends, you are as old as you think, so don’t think old. Speaker 1 Thank you so much. Speaker 2 Think tomorrow. Speaker 1 Yeah, and we’ll see everyone next time on your next chapter. Thank you. Speaker 2 Thank you. … # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. You will… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") ## [Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/positive-approach-to-care/ "Positive Approach to Care – Person Centered Memory Care") September 8, 2023 The Heights at Avery Heights was honored to speak with Teepa Snow one of the world’s leading advocates and educators for anyone living with dementia… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") ## [Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/ "Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid") September 5, 2023 In this episode, we interview CT Medicaid Specialists, Kristine Talarski, founder of Connecticut Medicaid Specialists on Medicaid eligibility, do’s and don’ts, and much more. Learn more … **Categories:** Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Caregiving, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ### [Important Questions and Answers: Senior Living and Medicaid](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/important-questions-and-answers-senior-living-and-medicaid/) **Published:** September 5, 2023 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** In this episode, we interview CT Medicaid Specialists, Kristine Talarski, founder of Connecticut Medicaid Specialists on Medicaid eligibility, do’s and don’ts, and much more. [Learn more ](http://ctmedicaidspecialists.com/) ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Hello, and welcome to your next chapter. So, so excited to be here today. This is an incredible, very serious, very topic that I get called about. And all my tours ask me, you know, how do we work with Medicaid? How does that work? What is the process? So I’m super excited to have our guests here today to help walk us through it, give us some answers to some questions and some resources and information. So I’m going to have you introduce yourself and tell us a little bit Speaker 2 about yourself as well. So I’m Christine Talarski. I’m from Connecticut Medicaid Specialists and we have been helping people and seniors with applying for Medicaid for well over 20 years. I’m a social worker by trade so I have a background working in skilled nursing facilities and hospitals. So I help them navigate that puzzle of trying to apply for Medicaid and seeing what benefits that they’re eligible for. Speaker 1 That’s amazing. That’s amazing. So let’s dive right in. What is Medicaid and how does it cover nursing home costs? Speaker 2 So Medicaid is a government program that is a type of insurance. And that helps pay for long-term care for people that are unable to pay privately for that in a skilled nursing facility. So it would cover things like room and board, their meals, their medications. Speaker 1 Nice, nice. And it’s national, correct? Yes, it is. Correct. Yes, it is. Speaker 2 Yep, yep. Every state is different and has their own guidelines. There could be different asset limits and income limits. Speaker 1 Yep. Great. So do you have to be in this? I’m throwing a question out there because I know I get this as well. Speaker 1 Let’s say you’re coming in from South Carolina, for example. How long do you need to be a resident of Connecticut to be able to get Medicaid? One day. Oh, nice. OK, very nice. Speaker 2 You cannot have you cannot have Medicaid in two different states at the same time. So if I’m working with someone and they’re from another state, we need to get a letter from their Department of Social Services worker in the other state saying that they’ve been discontinued benefits in that state so that they can apply and get benefits in the state of Connecticut. Speaker 1 Wow, that is great to know. Great to know. What are the income requirements to qualify for Medicaid and get nursing home coverage? Speaker 2 So the monthly income requirements for Medicaid, if you’re in a skilled nursing facility, there is no income limit. There are income limits for programs in the community. So if you’re applying for something like the Connecticut Home Care Program, the income limit for a individual is $2,382. If you’re married and you have a spouse, then the income limit is $4,764. If you’re in a skilled nursing facility, then your income, which they would call their, they typically use the phrase applied income, the income that you have goes towards the cost of your care. And then the Department of Social Services and Medicaid will help pay for the Speaker 1 difference in that cost. What if you have expenses and such? Do you get any money left over? Speaker 2 So for people that are in a skilled nursing facility and they’re on Medicaid, they get to have a personal allowance of $75 a month. And that is allowed for their personal allowance per month. Speaker 1 And if you’re in a nursing home, really, everything’s being taken care of. Speaker 2 So everything is being cared, your care, your meals, medications, medications, the doctors that come in to see you, that’s all being cared for. So sometimes when people have that $75 allowance each month, sometimes the families will use it and buy clothes for someone, or if they have a sweet tooth and they like chocolates, They may, you know, use it to buy little things or treats for their loved one that’s at the facility. Speaker 1 Because personal care products are covered as well, like adult diapers and that as well. So currently that’s 75, which a lot of times when people hear that, they’re like, you know, I mean, you and I, $75 to live off of. But because so much is being covered by the nursing home, really, like you said, for clothes, for treats and stuff like that is really. Speaker 2 If you want to have a prescription, you know, if you want to get the heart for current delivered to you. Sometimes people like the newspaper. Speaker 1 But what if you have, I’m sorry, what if you have like, you know, a car still or, you know, credit card bills that are still out there? What happens then? Is it still the 75? And what can what what does how how does that take care of? Speaker 2 So, yes, so it’s still the 75. If you’re in a facility long term and you have a spouse in the community and you have a car, then that car is protected. And that can be used. The spouse in the community can use that car. Speaker 2 Sometimes they’re using it if there’s a need for transportation because a husband or wife wants to go with the client to a doctor’s appointment or things to that nature. When you’re applying for Medicaid and you have credit card bills, then if you aren’t able to pay them, then really you’re not able to pay them. OK. And they can’t really they can’t go after your family. Speaker 2 or anybody to pay them. Speaker 1 Yeah. So generally just the same process is if I were in my own house and I couldn’t pay my credit cards, you got to kind of take those same steps, talk to the credit card company and kind of figure it out. Yeah. Speaker 2 Right, right. I mean, yeah, a lot of times, unfortunately, you know, it may be a loss for them. Yeah, yeah. Speaker 2 Credit card company, because a lot of times people may depend on those, you know, when they’re in the community because they’re living on such limited income And then something happens and they go into a skilled nursing facility and they say, well, geez, I’ve racked up all these credit card bills because I had to pay for food or I had to pay for medical bills. And if you don’t have the money to pay for it, what can you do? I mean, if you have a house and you can sell a house and pay off some of your debt, that’s great. Speaker 2 But for a lot of people that may not have property and they live in an apartment or they live in senior housing. Speaker 1 That’s a good segue. What happens with your assets? Let’s say you do have, you know, a pretty substantial house. What happens with that? You know, if you have to go, do you private pay until you’re Medicaid eligible or what happens with that? Speaker 2 For someone who is single or widowed or divorced, if you go into a facility and you have a house, then the typical standard is that they will put the house on the market. And then you have to sell the house for fair market value. Sometimes people will say to me, well, can I pay a dollar? Speaker 2 Can I transfer it for $80,000? And it’s a $300,000 house. You have to sell it for fair market value. Speaker 2 And that’s very important. Once you sell the house, you can use the proceeds from the sale of the house to pay for your care at the skilled nursing facility. You can pay for a funeral. You can prepay for an irrevocable funeral. In the state of Connecticut, it’s up to $10,000. Speaker 2 And then you can set up an revocable funeral contract, which is separate. Speaker 1 Yeah. And you can’t give any of the money to your kids or anyone like that. Speaker 2 It becomes a real problem when you do that because then that puts you in a penalty period. And when you’re applying for Medicaid, there is a five-year look back. So if you were to sell your house now and then want to transfer money from the sale of the house to your children, that becomes a problem because then when you do apply for Medicaid and it’s in that five-year look back, then you’re going to have get hit with a penalty. And then what that means is that they would refuse to grant you Medicaid to help pay for the care of your and the nursing facility. Speaker 1 And what’s a penalty period? Like how long is that? And it depends on how much it really depends Speaker 2 on how much is given. So sort of what the analogy that I sort of use to sort of explain to people is say you gave your daughter last year $20,000 and say the average cost of a nursing home is $20,000, which is a little high, but we’ll just use that for numbers. If you gave $20,000 and the nursing home average cost is $20,000, that’s a one month penalty. So what that means is at the time you would have become eligible and you were under $1,600 in assets, if you were financially eligible October 1st and said, okay, I’m under $1,600 in assets, I’m eligible for Medicaid, they could say, well, you did that transfer. We’re giving you a one-month penalty, which means now you are not Speaker 1 eligible until November. And so what happens if you’re in the nursing home? Let’s say life is life and you and I both know. So you go to rehab, find out, unfortunately, you need long-term care. You’ve got to go the Medicaid route. You’ve done this kind of thing, which we’re cautioning not to do. Speaker 1 Give the 20,000 to your daughter. Obviously, you didn’t know. You didn’t know, you know, two years later, you’d be in this state. What happens? Like you’ve run out of private funds to pay. What happens to you? Do you get thrown out of the nursing home? Like what happens? Speaker 2 There’s a couple of different things. Yeah. Well, and there’s a couple of different scenarios that I’ve run into. I’m actually working with someone now where there was money that was gifted over time to different people. And the daughter actually took it upon herself to say, I’m taking out a private loan and I’m giving the money back to my mother that was given. Speaker 2 So if the money can be given back, then that’s the right thing to do. Speaker 1 Oh, okay, nice. Speaker 2 And so I will encourage people that, you know, you need to give that money back because this is going to be imposed a penalty. And I’ve had some really good luck. I’ve had people say or families say, you know, hey, that’s fine. And like I said, I have one client that took out a personal loan and put the money back in her mother’s account. Speaker 1 Nice. Speaker 2 If you if they don’t have the money or they don’t want to pay, give the money back. That becomes a problem because then there’s a penalty. Speaker 1 Nice, nice. Speaker 2 But I, you know, I’m going to look at my little notes here. Speaker 1 So do we I don’t know whether we went over this. What are the different nursing home care options covered by Medicaid? I think did we go over that? Speaker 2 I think so. Skilled, skilled care for long term care. Yep. Short term rehab. Speaker 2 there and for an illness or say they’ve fallen, they broke a hip or they had to have knee surgery and they’re there for short-term rehab. And it pays, as you know, as you know, for a skilled nursing facility, that is a facility that provides 24-hour care, round-the-clock nursing. Speaker 1 Okay. We did look back here. We’re cruising along. Do all nursing homes accept Medicaid? Okay. Speaker 2 Most of them do. There are a few that do not. And I think it’s important when you’re going to look at facilities and you’re going to go and tour a facility for your mom or dad, even if you’re just thinking down the road and you say, hey, I want to go and tour somewhere and I really like this place and I want to put my mom on a wait list. Speaker 2 But when she needs it, that’s great. But you need to check and see if they accept Medicaid. Most of them do accept Medicaid. There are a few that do not and they’re private pay. And those facilities typically will want a lot of financial information and may, you know, want money up front to pay for X amount of time. Speaker 1 Yeah, I worked up in the Berkshires and I know that there was one up there that I, and that’s actually maybe the first one I ever actually ran into lovely facility, by the way, but they didn’t accept Medicaid at all. And Medicaid beds are limited too, in some Speaker 2 facilities, correct? Where there’s, they have designated beds that are, yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 And things I know, things have heated up a little bit with nursing homes. I know for a while, there were like tons of beds, but I think now do you find that it’s tough for someone to get Speaker 2 a Medicaid bed? It really depends. I mean, when we’re in the heat of COVID, I think it was difficult because of just everything that was going on and people were sick. And, you know, there’s so many nursing facilities and there’s so many beds out there. And it can be overwhelming for family when they’re looking at places as to like which one they really prefer. Speaker 2 So and it changes day to day. I mean, I have people that say to me, well, I really like this facility and I would really like to go there. But, you know, they don’t have any beds. Speaker 2 And I encourage them to be put on a wait list because things change daily in skilled facilities. And you can always apply for Medicaid and be in one facility. And then if you’re on a wait list somewhere else, you can transfer and go to that other facility as long as that other facility accepts Medicaid. Speaker 1 And that’s what I did with my mom, actually. She was in one in the Windsor area and I wanted West Hartford and then I was able to transfer to West Hartford. And I think that’s so good that you stated that because a lot of times what happens, I don’t think because we’re in the industry, we know it’s an ever moving and you can do what you need to do. Speaker 1 But I think people get so caught up in the fear. Oh, my gosh, if I move her, blah, blah, blah. you know, but you can, you know, exactly what you said, you know, if you’re, you have to, I think the one of the most important things I always stress is ask questions and you want to get the best quality of care for your loved one. And so don’t be afraid to, like you just said, think out of the box and put them there and then move them after. I think that’s right. Rather than waiting and having their funds running out and, and that type of thing. Absolutely. Absolutely. Speaker 2 They always have a choice. They think that if I apply for Medicaid and I’m in a facility that I don’t have a choice as to where I want to go or they feel like, you know, I can never leave the nursing facility and go out for a day with my loved one or go to church. And that’s not true. Speaker 1 Yeah, I think it’s important for people to realize they have choice and to call on resources like yourself. Speaking of which, tell us how to get in touch with you and say the name of your company again. Speaker 2 Sure. So the name of my company is Connecticut Medicaid Specialists with an S at the end. You can find me online or people, I give out my cell phone and I have family members call me and they can come directly. Speaker 1 Yep. Give that web address and your phone number, please. Speaker 2 Sure. So my the number you can reach me at is 860-490-6772. And I’m available seven days a week. I take calls and speak with families in the evening, on Saturdays, on Sundays. Speaker 2 A lot of times there are families that are contacting me and they work. So they need to meet with me in the evenings or on the weekends. So I try to do my best to accommodate them and work with them so that we can get things done around the schedule. Speaker 2 I’m sorry. Speaker 1 What’s the website? Speaker 2 Connecticut Medicaid specialists. Speaker 1 Nice. Speaker 2 Dot com dot org dot com. Sorry. Connecticut Medicaid specialist dot com. If you Google Connecticut Medicaid specialists, I’ll come right up. Speaker 1 There you go. There you go. So let’s dive back in. So different states have different names for their Medicaid programs? Speaker 2 Yes, they do. Yes, they do. Not every state, every some states have different names that I don’t even know. But a family member will refer to me and they’ll say that Medicaid in New York or New Jersey or. Speaker 1 OK, nice. And we’re Title 19. Is Title 19 universal or where that’s a Connecticut thing? Speaker 2 No, it’s that’s universal. So title 19 is the same as Medicaid. Okay. So that is the same. Speaker 2 And the way to think of it is title 18 is Medicare. Oh, 18 is Medicare and title 19 is Medicaid. Speaker 1 That is awesome. I’m like a weird trivia person. And I was going to ask you, but I didn’t want to put you on the spot because I’m like, why is the title 19? But I’m like, Speaker 2 Yeah, let me not put it around. That’s awesome. And some people, yeah, people will say, well, I have Title 19. And I’ll say that’s Medicaid. And they’ll say, no, no, I have Title 19. And I go, and then I explain to them and say, okay, there’s different titles. So Speaker 1 we have that same conversation with people. So let’s talk more about the home care programs. I do think that’s important. I think a lot of people don’t realize that they can get money follows a person and they can get kind of home care as well. They don’t necessarily have to go to a skilled nursing home if they qualify. So let’s talk about the Connecticut Home Care program for the elderly. Tell me who’s eligible and tell me a little bit overview of that. Speaker 2 So I actually used to work for the Connecticut Home Care program. So I know a lot about the program, which is very exciting. It’s a great program for people that are in a skilled nursing facility or at risk of going into a skilled nursing facility and need help at home, whether it’s just to fill in gaps where family needs help for certain periods of time during the day. Speaker 2 I’ve even had some people that actually have a live-in caregiver because they need so much care. And so the Connecticut Home Care Program is a program for people over the age of 65, and it helps pay for care at home. So there’s different levels of the program, depending on if you’re eligible for Medicaid or not. Speaker 2 If you’re not eligible for Medicaid, sometimes they may ask that you contribute a small percentage of the cost of your care plan for services. And it is a program that can help pay for a nurse to come out and help you, a home health aide or a personal care assistant. and those people can help with bathing and dressing and meal preparation. It can help pay for a companion, someone that might be able to come in and just spend some time with you and maybe help with a meal or things to that nature. It can pay for Lifeline or Life Alert, which is a button to help call if you’re a lot of people that are on the home care program live alone. And this is a, you know, the device such as that they can use if something happens and they have a fall and they need to get help. And also we’ll pay for adult daycare. A lot of times people are home and they’re so isolated that they could have the opportunity to go to adult daycare a few days a week and it gets them out. It gets them socializing. They have meals. They go to programs. Speaker 1 That’s wonderful. That’s wonderful. And I love this program. I think it’s been, how long has it been around now? It’s not like from the beginning of Title I. Speaker 2 No, it’s been around for a very long time, though. It’s been around for a long time. I think it’s a great program. So many people that if that program wasn’t around, I think that there would be more and more people that would be in nursing facilities that don’t have the support. Speaker 1 Yeah. And sometimes people are just more high functioning. You know, unfortunately, I know of a case of a gentleman that had an accident. Speaker 1 You know, he’s in the 70s. And unfortunately, you know, he’s paralyzed. But up here, he’s great. And so sometimes being in a nursing home, he’s not mentally there yet. Speaker 1 Maybe physically, but not mentally. This program, I think, can be very helpful for that. Speaker 2 Absolutely. And for people that are under the age of 65, I see a lot of people that will be possibly able to qualify for the Money Follows the Person program, which is a program for people that typically they’re under the age of 65. And that program can help people to get back into a home environment and you would help navigate the care and hire and fire your own staff and you have to be able to direct your own care. Speaker 1 Yeah, I love that. This is a great program. So tell me again about your company. Give me an overview of your services and we’ll wrap up. Thank you for this very much. We’re very great information and exactly what we needed. Speaker 2 Oh, you’re so welcome. So again, it’s Connecticut Medicaid specialists. I assist families and I assist loved ones with the Medicaid application process. Speaker 2 I meet with everyone on an individual basis and we’ll meet with families, whether they’re at home or even going to skilled nursing facilities to sit down and meet with them and go over the entire process. I submit the applications. I am the liaison and I will collaborate between the Department of Social Services social worker who will be assigned to the case and the nursing facility. Speaker 2 One of the nice things with Connecticut Medicaid specialists is that we actually have a elder law attorney that is available to us and we can run by Medicaid applications that may be complicated to him. So if there’s something that’s a big red flag, such as like transfer of assets or things to that nature, or for example, if there’s a spouse that they’re still married, but they have been estranged for 20 years. And so what do you do in a case like that where you have to apply for Medicaid and the spouse is still married and they’re not together or they’re not communicating or they, you know. Speaker 2 So that’s a really great resource that we are able to have for people that may need to get advice from an elder law attorney to kind of get some ideas of how to handle that. Speaker 1 Nice. Nice. Well, thank you again for being here. Speaker 1 We’re super grateful and we’ll get this out. Look forward to seeing you again for sure. Thank you. Speaker 1 Thank you. Thank you. # Similar Podcasts - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") ## [Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/moving-forward-navigating-the-transition-to-a-senior-living-community/ "Moving Forward Navigating the Transition to a Senior Living Community") June 7, 2024 When it’s time to discuss transitioning to a senior living community, you may encounter resistance from your loved one or other family members. 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The role that activities plays in the life of a… **Categories:** Financial & Legal Planning, Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Financial Planning, Medicaid, Senior Living --- ### [Your Next Chapter with Special Guest: For All Ages](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/your-next-chapter-with-special-guest-for-all-ages/) **Published:** December 15, 2022 **Author:** averyheights1 **Content:** Listen as guest Deb Bibbons from non-profit agency, For All Ages, joins us to talk about their programs that help older adults struggling with loneliness, isolation, and more. Learn more about For All Ages at . ### Episide Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to Avery Heights Senior Living Community Show. Your next chapter. Avery Heights is a 43 acre senior living community with a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living, memory care, and a whole lot more. Now, this show will provide helpful hints and resources for older adults that will empower and encourage you in your life journey. From topics related to physical and emotional health, financial wealth, senior living communities, and more. Siobhan. Hi. Good morning. Nice to see you. It’s Gary Byron. Nice to see you. I can barely, hold on a second. I can barely see you. I know. There you are. It’s like a weird dinner table today. It’s like that big, you ever go to like one of those tables, they have this big vase of like big sunflowers. It’s like, hello, is there a person? You got to move it out of the way. I can’t do that here. Speaker 2 Nice to see you, though. Good to see you. How has your week been? My week has been amazing. Yeah. Speaker 1 You know, that’s great to hear. I like to hear. Speaker 2 Yeah, we got a lot of great people moving in. So we’re having a good time with that. And I saw my grandson this weekend. He’s absolutely adorable. This is what it’s all about. He’s adorable. I was making him laugh. Speaker 1 What do you do when you spend time with your grandson? Speaker 2 I just act silly. I love to dance. They always think I’m really ridiculous. But I like to just get down on the floor and, you know, what is it? Speaker 1 wear a stumpkin and I was playing with his little toes and do you let your grandson get away with more than when you were a parent and allowed your own children to get away with he’s only Speaker 2 eight months old okay but I suspect I will because it’s so cool because you have him and then he Speaker 1 starts crying and you give him back yeah because I noticed that with my like this is for you I’m like what are we doing here and they’re like oh you never let me get away with this Speaker 2 stuff. I’m like, oh, okay. That’s how my dad was with my daughter. I couldn’t believe how much she could talk back to him. And I was like, did you hear what she said? Did you hear what she said? I was trying to get her in trouble. But yeah, she got away with everything. Speaker 1 So we have a really good show for us this morning. Yes, yes. Do you want to, would you like to introduce our guest? Speaker 2 Yes, we have a wonderful guest. This is a great new partnership or strategic partnership that we’re starting at Avery Heights with a wonderful organization called For All Ages. You know how I’m talking about how intergenerational communication and older adults and younger folks communicating together is so important. And I was very blessed to find a wonderful agency at Celebrate West Hartford, actually. I was walking through the booths, and I was doing my mom thing. And all of a sudden, I was like, uh-oh. And I went right over, and we started talking. And I immediately emailed her the next week and said, come on in. And we’ve got some great stuff planned. But we’ll talk about that a little bit later. I’ll let her kind of brag a little bit about her wonderful nonprofit. Is this Devin? Nonprofit. Devin is. Speaker 3 Good morning. Good morning, Deb. How are you? Nice to see you here. Wonderful to be here. Thanks so much for having me. Yes. So For All Ages is, it’s a nonprofit organization. It’s a new organization founded in 2019. And the mission is to connect the generations to end loneliness and reduce ageism and improve health and well-being. So what does that mean? What it means is that we create positive, collaborative experiences between the generations that showcase the wisdom and the vibrancy of older adults while countering loneliness. That is at an epidemic level across all ages. And so really, this is even prior to the pandemic. So think before the pandemic, if we can think back that far and what our lives were like. Loneliness was at an epidemic level. More than 60% of Americans were reporting feeling lonely, which is just an incredible statistic when you take a step back and think about it. And loneliness is different from isolation. So isolation is very objective. Either you’re isolated or you aren’t. Loneliness is very subjective and it’s how you feel. You can be around a group of people and feel lonely or you can be Speaker 1 by yourself and be comfortable with that. How interesting is that? You just said something that really hit home where you can actually be around people and feel lonely. Yes. Yes. Some people that’s, that’s, that’s almost an oxymoron for some people. Speaker 3 it really has to do with the fact that we are social beings. All of us are, are social beings. And when we don’t have the social connection that we feel we need ourselves, that’s what makes us lonely. And so loneliness is different for every person. It’s similar to other mental health related issues that are different for every person. Speaker 1 Is it related at all to being an introvert or extrovert? Speaker 3 It is not. It is not. No. Speaker 1 Because if you’re in a crowd of people, as I was just alluding to, where you can be with other people and feel lonely, well, you can say, well, that person is more of an introvert. They’ve always been quiet. I’ve known him or her or whatever, you know, their whole life. And they’re always on the quiet side. Okay. I can dig that. Not everybody’s the same. And that’s fine and dandy. But there is a big difference then, I guess, then between being an introvert and just a quiet person as opposed to being lonely. Speaker 3 Correct. They are very different. And so what we’re really after is to reduce loneliness for everyone across all ages. And the best way to do that is to give people opportunities to come together with others in a safe space, a place where they feel welcome, a place where they can have fun and enjoy the company of other people. And that’s what we do. Speaker 1 How do you do it? Speaker 3 Well, so we think about collaborating with organizations like Avery Heights. And sometimes we’re outreaching people that are living at home. And we create these opportunities. So we have a virtual program that connects college students with older adults during the college semester. And it really brings together the two loneliest populations, young adults and older adults, and they grow in intergenerational friendship. What we really love to do, though, is the in-person programs where we bring people together. So, for instance, at Avery Heights, we’ll be partnering with Siobhan and bringing youth and young adults into Avery Heights to run intergenerational events. So that’s really exciting. We’re looking forward to that. Speaker 1 Is it difficult, though, to bring that out of a person? There’s one thing about being lonely, and I know lonely people. And I guess for me, I’m trying to wrestle with the difference between the conscious decision of me or a person not choosing to socialize or wanting to socialize and either, A, having no one to socialize with, or B, not even knowing how. Do you know like that? He’s a good person to break the ice with. Because, you know, everybody knows that person at a party where it’s like, oh, come in. He’s a life of the party. He’s a welcome wagon. He’ll let you do, you know, blah, blah, blah. But there’s certain people who, maybe that’s the extreme, but they don’t even know how to engage in a conversation. Correct. Speaker 3 Do you teach them or? Well, it depends on the program. So sometimes when we’re running a multi-week program with the same group of people, we sit down with a set of the older adults and the younger adults and we have a conversation with them ahead of time. So they make sure they understand what they’re sort of getting themselves into and the commitment of growing this friendship over the course of multiple weeks. When we’re running a one afternoon event, we bring people together and invite people. And if they have an interest, then they come. Right. So it’s based on a different topic or a different subject or we’re doing something. It may be music related. It may be art related. And so it will attract people that already have an interest in whatever it is we’re doing. And we don’t go knocking on the door and saying, hey, are you lonely? Come join us. Right? It’s not what it’s about because I don’t think that that would work. And so we’re just about having fun and finding a place to bring people together and offering an opportunity. And people who want to come, they come, and then we can help. We can help break down any barriers that they may have been having as far as maybe self-isolating. And a great example, early on in 2019, we ran a program at an adult living community, And there was an older adult there who had been self-isolating after she had lost her spouse. So she had been in her room and had not been coming down to meals with other residents. And we ran this program and she heard the commotion of four and five-year-old Girl Scouts outside of her door. And she opened her door and came out and sat with us. Now, unbeknownst to me, I didn’t know what was happening. But there was this magic that started happening. She started engaging for the first time in five months. And the next morning I got a call from the director saying, hey, you don’t know what you did. But she came down to breakfast for the first time in five months. So that’s the magic. That’s awesome. Speaker 1 Isn’t it? That’s a great story. All right. So you said you started in 2019. How? Whose idea was this? Speaker 3 Ultimately, it was I found the idea. Let’s put it that way. Speaker 1 You can take credit because you’re here. Speaker 3 I know. Are you the founder? I am the founder. Speaker 1 What was your inspiration behind this? Speaker 3 Yeah. So that’s where I watched a family member go through a really tough period of time before he passed away where all of his friends had passed before him. Okay. And he was sort of the last one standing and he became very lonely. Yeah. And it was my belief that that loneliness contributed to his deterioration of health and his passing. So I started doing research and found a large body of research on the negative health impacts of loneliness. Loneliness is a root cause of anxiety, depression, addiction, suicide. Lonely older adults have a 30% higher probability of having a stroke, of developing heart disease, and a 40% higher probability of developing dementia. And so I spent many years in the insurance industry. So this was, I’m not a social worker. I came to this as someone who was curious and wanting to understand what was really happening. And once I realized the connection, I went out and looked for a nonprofit in Connecticut that I could work with and volunteer on behalf of and couldn’t find one. And so I launched this organization along with a longtime friend of mine, Gary Sikorsky. He and I launched this organization together with the idea that we were going to make a positive impact across the state of Connecticut. Speaker 1 I’ll bet you are. Speaker 2 Yeah, it’s awesome. Speaker 1 How do you utilize this nonprofit organization? Speaker 2 Yeah, so we have a few activities we’re going to be doing at the community. So we’re going to be doing a community with rock painting. So we’re bringing in actually some preteens and teens around Halloween, and they’re going to be with the older adults, and they’re going to make rocks, and we’re going to kind of make it kind of a Halloween event. We’re also having them in our knitting group. They’re actually knitting tea cozies for all ages, which is great. We’re actually doing a social hour so that kind of brings some of those folks out like we were talking about out of their apartments and come say hello as well. So we’re pretty excited, and we’re actually going to be sponsoring the Hartford Marathon through them as well. So it’s pretty cool stuff that we have coming up. Speaker 3 Yeah, we’re really excited about that. And, you know, Siobhan talks about rock painting. It really isn’t about the painting of the rocks. It’s about the fact that we will be bringing people together. We’ll have icebreakers and we’ll be getting people talking and engaging with one another. And then together, everyone will paint rocks. Speaker 2 Yes, I’m actually excited about the painting of the rocks because every time I go to the beach, I get a rock from the beach. And we actually have like a table where we have all these rocks. So for me, I’m like, oh, the dancing of the rocks. But you’re right. All that stuff is great. Obviously, yep, that’s awesome. Speaker 1 On your website, you mentioned stopping ageism. How do you achieve that? Speaker 3 Yes. So that’s a tough one, so to be very honest with you. But our goal really is to get older adults, provide them an opportunity where they can showcase their wisdom and showcase their experience, give them a sense of purpose, and give them the opportunity to improve their self-esteem. And so ageism goes both ways, right? Older adults may have a preconceived notion of what it means to be a young adult, just as a young adult can have that similar notion of an older adult. And so when we bring people together, everyone gets to understand one another better. And both the older adults and the future older adults, as we like to think of young adults, get to understand that aging and growing older can be a really positive thing. Yeah. Yeah. The life we always talk about, life is not over. Speaker 2 Our big thing is your next chapter. That’s the name of the show. Right. And that’s what this is all about. It’s really important to bring those two people together so that they can, like you said, break the loneliness, but also have purpose together and start to communicate the younger Speaker 1 and the older. And it’s beautiful to say. What kind of response have you been receiving? I would imagine it’s just extremely welcoming. Yeah, it’s been a fantastic response from throughout all of Speaker 3 the communities that we have been working with. People are excited about it. They want to know how they can get involved. We’ve got parents reaching out and saying, how do we get our kids volunteering with you? And we’ve got parents, grown parents, who are now reaching out and saying, well, what about my mom? What about my dad? You know, can I enroll them in one of your programs? So it’s just been a fantastic response. And people really throughout Connecticut have been excited about it. Our intergenerational friendship program, which is something we launched during the pandemic, really out of necessity because we couldn’t get people together in person. It connects a college student with an older adult for a once a week phone call, and they grow an intergenerational friendship. That involves college students. And we engage one volunteer at a different university to go out amongst his or her peers at that college and spread awareness of the opportunity. And that has been tremendous. Are these college students that want to pursue a Speaker 1 career in human services or social services? Sometimes, sometimes, but not necessarily. Speaker 3 So we have had people from a variety, focus on a variety of careers really get engaged. Sometimes nursing and health related, as you mentioned. Sometimes social services related. But other times it’s people that say, hey, I grew up living in a home where my grandmother lived with me. We were a multi-generational home. And I know how much value I got out of being part of that. And I want to support this. And I want others to understand what the great benefit is. Speaker 1 What an incredible program. I would have never have thought. Are there any other states? What are you using as a template or as a blueprint, if you will? Are there other states that have something even similar to this? Speaker 3 There are a few intergenerational nonprofits around here and there, but we don’t have a template. We design and create everything ourselves. So we just brainstorm, think about what we would enjoy doing, and think about what our parents may enjoy doing. So that’s how we developed our fishing derby. We host an intergenerational fishing derby every May in conjunction with Winding Trails in Farmington, where we bring older adult anglers, men and women, together, and they teach youth who’ve never had the chance to learn how to fish, how to do so. And we pair them one-to-one for the morning. It is. and the magic just happens but you know siobhan it’s it’s interesting how Speaker 1 prior to 2019 an organization like this never even existed yeah you know and i think like how does that fly under everybody’s radar for so long because it’s not just it’s not just a senior issue i know people of all ages who are lonely you know um and yet i think we take that for granted where it’s just loneliness. Oh, I’ll go spend some time with that person. No, Speaker 2 there’s chronic loneliness. And I think especially, you know, in Connecticut, I mean, other states as well, but I think Connecticut doesn’t necessarily bring people together. I think you have to go out and seek entertainment and social activity. It’s not like New York where you walk outside your door and it’s like all this stuff is going on. It’s like you really have to search and find it. So I think a lot of people are, especially, you know, go back to the pandemic, are lonely during this time. Speaker 1 On your website, you mentioned promoting better health now. How do you achieve that? Speaker 3 Yeah. So that’s really bringing together combating loneliness and isolation along with reducing ageism. So when we think about the health benefits to both the younger and the older populations that we bring together, you’ve got loneliness that has negative health impacts. And if we can break that cycle within a person, that’s going to improve their health along with reducing ageism. So one of the really interesting statistics that’s out there is the fact that older adults, when they think positively about their own aging and feel good about it, they live on average seven and a half years longer. And so if we can get people thinking that they are enjoying themselves and that it’s a vibrant life and they’re still engaging and they have purpose, we’re helping to extend their life. And so for us, that’s how we’re thinking about improving health and well-being. As relates to the business world, so I’m going to change gears for a second. There are lonely employees in every walk of life, in every type of large organization, small organization, and they are less productive. And they are five times as likely to call out sick to work due to stress related to loneliness. And so one of the things that we started thinking about it for all ages is, well, what can we do potentially to help in that area? And we designed an education seminar that we are now offering. We just did it for a very large organization throughout the country. We did it virtually, talking about how intergenerational connection improves social health, getting real about loneliness, and then providing ideas for people, both in work and outside of work, to socially connect. Speaker 1 I’ve got to do this really quickly. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, Senior Living with Avery Heights. We are joined this morning with Deb Bivens. She’s a founder and CEO of For All Ages, along with Siobhan. I’m Gary here. I have to ask this question regarding the differences in the age demographics. In other words, do the wants and needs of a lonely senior and the wants and needs of a lonely middle-aged individual, are there any parallels or is there any overlap of? I mean, I know that you can just say, well, we’re all human beings. We’re all social creatures. We’re not meant to be alone. Yeah, that’s all encompassing. But I’m talking specifically about, you know, we all change as we evolve, as we age. Absolutely. So, you know, are things more important or less important when you’re of a certain age in comparison to somebody that’s either older or younger? Speaker 3 Well, I guess the way I would answer that is there is something called the U-curve of happiness, right? And so what it means is that the least happy people are middle-aged working people who have a lot of stress. And as we get older. I’m sorry. That’s exactly what you said. What I was thinking. Yes, Siobhan. And so we’re really happy when we’re young. Don’t be in the bush or anything. We’re really happy when we’re young. And then, you know, we have all these obligations as we are working, you know, maybe taking care of our parents and our children at the same time. And then we become very happy as we continue to age out. And so the older we get, the happier we get. So there’s this U curve of happiness. So I guess that’s the way I would answer the question of, is it the same? It’s not the same because the way to engage, you know, I’m going to say a middle-aged person and get that person excited about coming to one of our programs versus an 80-year-old, they can be very different. And it really comes down to topic, right? And how are we going to bring people together? We think about ways that we can offer programs that reach everyone. So music-related programs come to mind. Sports-related programs come to mind. So we’re thinking about multi-generational opportunities. At the same time that we’re thinking about how do we work with organizations like Avery Heights and make sure that we can have a positive impact on their residents. Speaker 1 I want to bring Siobhan back more into this conversation because obviously you brought her in this morning for a reason. Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 You obviously, I would think that Avery Heights and for all ages have a new partnership. You started talking about this in the beginning of the show and then we kind of got off track a little bit in just a few minutes that we have remaining. I’d like to hear a little bit about this partnership. I mean, what an incredible resource. I would be taking every advantage of this seriously. I mean, you really, I’m so impressed with this organization. And again, I go right back. I can’t believe this doesn’t exist. But I want to hear from you, Siobhan. Speaker 2 Yeah. So we’re excited to do the T at 3 program that they have, bringing the college students with our older adults. Because like she said, things happen. You know, someone’s husband or spouse might pass away. And so that person might self-isolate. And I think that’s going to be a great way to kind of bring these people back out. I mean, COVID has made people isolate, that fear of, oh, my gosh, I’m going to get this. And so this is going to be a good way. Every month or every week, they’re going to be having this conversation with this college student. Hopefully, they’re kind of upbeat and wanting to speak with their kind of phone pal, I guess, or pen pal. Speaker 3 Teammate. We call them teammates. Teammates. There we go. We have a play on teammates because the theme is T at three. Oh, I love that. We call them teammates. Everything she thinks of. I love it. I love it. Speaker 1 I’m just going to sit back and listen to all your play on words and your creativity. Speaker 2 It’s so well thought of. Wow. That’s what I love about it. So professional. It’s got to go on. Yeah. Yeah. And it’s so well needed. You know, I think I Googled to see if there were others in other states. And I think I found maybe we’re talking maybe in the Boston area. But it should be throughout the United States. I’m hoping they go kind of national with it and take it across the country because it’s definitely something. Speaker 3 People have asked us about that. And, you know, we’re trying to be really thoughtful as we grow. We don’t want to get out ahead of ourselves. And really what we’re thinking about is within the state of Connecticut, what can we do to bring together different organizations, different parts of the community to see what it is that we’re doing? And we’re creating, we call it we’re creating a space within a place, whatever that place may be. But we’re creating this space and it’s a safe space and it’s a fun space and it’s bringing people together in a way that maybe people haven’t thought about before. Speaker 1 Yeah, it sounds like you really approach this slowly and gradually. You’re not in your face with this and you’re not going from zero to Mach 1000 in 10 seconds. You are – every individual, you’re letting them go at their own pace to be – Speaker 3 Yes, exactly. So we want people to feel comfortable. We want people to be happy, right? So that’s the idea, that the more that people see the benefit of intergenerational engagement, the more that they’ll want to continue it and tell their neighbors and tell their friends and tell their family. Speaker 1 I’ve only got about a minute and a half. What are some of your needs right now? Speaker 3 Sure. So we are always looking for great volunteers to help us design and help roll out our programs. We’re an official charity of the Hartford Marathon, and we would love to have some volunteers volunteer on our behalf at Elizabeth Park. You can sign up on our website at forallages.org. Join Team FAA. Check out our website. Follow us on our Facebook and Instagram pages. Forallages.org is our handle. Check us out on LinkedIn. We’re there, too, for professionals to follow us. But we’re a growing organization. Anyone that may have an interest in being on our advisory council, happy to have a conversation. Or potentially even our board of directors, happy to have a conversation. Speaker 1 Nice. I’m so delighted that you were able to bring in Deb this morning. I mean it, Siobhan. In fact, well, we’ll talk off the – because I’ve only got less than a minute left. She’s amazing. She is. And I can understand this partnership. Speaker 2 The energy is like – it’s infectious. Speaker 1 It truly is. Speaker 2 I love it. Speaker 1 I want to thank our guests this morning from For All Ages. You can check them out online at forallages.org. Deb Bibbins, founder and CEO. Outstanding. I’m going to do some research on this on my own time. That’s great. And see how else I can. Speaker 2 And run the marathon, right? Speaker 1 Well, boy. I saw you kind of give me a nod on that. Speaker 3 You can walk the Charity 5K like I can. Speaker 1 Come on now. I used to run six days a week, but I peaked at three miles. I said I used to. Maybe I should start taking that back up again You’ve been listening to again The latest edition of your next chapter Senior living with Avery Heights For more information on today’s special guest for all ages Please call this number 866-537-1446 The first three callers Will get a special lunch And tour at Avery Heights That’s quite generous Might be something Maybe some lunch You might find me there one morning For Siobhan Avery Heights. I’m Gary Byron. Until next Saturday, have a good one, everybody. 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Scott Fitzgerald’s often pondered the importance of purpose. He felt the need to encourage people to find their own life’s meaning no matter what their age. He said: “It’s never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit. Start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best of the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you’ve never felt before. I hope you meet people who have different points of view. I hope you [live a life](https://averyheights.org/10-ways-assisted-living-can-improve-your-quality-of-life/) you’re proud of and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start over again.” In this episode, we talk about the Power of Purpose for older adults. 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Owner and founder of F50Woman, Julia Jack joins us to… - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-case-for-age-positivity-in-greeting-cards/ "The Case for Age Positivity in Greeting Cards") ## [The Case for Age Positivity in Greeting Cards](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/the-case-for-age-positivity-in-greeting-cards/ "The Case for Age Positivity in Greeting Cards") July 7, 2023 In this episode, we interview pro-age advocate and the founder of Age-Friendly Vibes, Jan Golden. 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She is a teacher at Waldorf High School and owner of the publishing company Keats and Co. We are hoping that this interview will give valuable and powerful information on ways of dealing with unexpected and overwhelming grief. Beth’s story is an inspiration to many as she took an unexpected tragedy in her life and did something good with it – not just for herself but for the community and possibly the world. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter, a production of the Heights at Avery Heights, a one of a kind senior living community centrally located near all of the most exciting and entertaining historical spots in Connecticut. This show is dedicated to empowering older adults with helpful resources, ideas, inspiration, tips to encourage them on life’s journey. Our production is also dedicated to the younger generation so they can better understand how to develop greater communication and enjoyment for those elders in their community. Along with senior living specialist over at the Heights, Siobhan Mattingly. Good morning, Siobhan. Speaker 2 Good morning. Nice to see you. Good to see you. How was your week? Week was amazing. Speaker 1 Oh, it’s not excellent. Speaker 2 No. Amazing. Amazing, yes. Yeah, we started our memory cafe at the Heights. Speaker 2 You did? That’s right. Oh. Speaker 2 Yes. Do tell. It was really good. Speaker 2 We had a paint and sip type of thing. Yes. So we had these huge cupcakes from Tim. Speaker 2 These red velvet cupcakes were just like for like Jolly Green Giant or something. They were beautiful cupcakes. And then we had, I always start with the food. Speaker 2 It is a wonderful spread of food. I understand why, by the way. I’ve eaten it. Speaker 2 But she did such a great job. She did kind of a heart and then she had birds. And so if you had three people in your family or two people, you know, if it was just you and as a couple and you put them within the heart and it was nice. Speaker 2 And after we took pictures of everyone with their actual picture that they made with their loved one. And it was really good. We had some folks. Speaker 2 We had a daughter and her dad and it was just really neat. But it’s just a cool way for caregivers and their loved one that has dementia and Alzheimer’s, you know, to really just relate, to connect, you know, just to have a good time, just to have fun. So you kicked it off. Speaker 2 How often will this be? Is this an ongoing? Yes. Speaker 2 It’ll be every month on the second Monday at 1 p.m. And we’ve got such a good lineup. We have coming. We have a wonderful singer for St. Patrick’s Day. Speaker 2 She’s going to sing some great Irish songs. We have People Plant Connection. so people will learn about plants and they’ll actually walk away with a couple of plants as well so more of a hands-on type of thing we have a luau coming in June in May we’re going to have a barbecue in August of course we’re going to have an ice cream social and then we have our drum circle coming in July and drum circles are so music is obviously so amazing for people with memory challenges so this is going to be great Speaker 1 the luau sounds great the barbecue has me thinking Speaker 2 but you really had me at the ice cream social yes yes yeah it’s going to be good yeah i may have to Speaker 1 pop in on that one and grab a cone and see hello yeah it’ll be good to see some of the uh yeah it’s Speaker 2 one of those uh and it’s for people from the outside so it’s free to the public the general public can come themselves and their caregiver um we have four people coming actually the caregiver and three other people are coming and that’s fine as long as you know they have someone there a loved one there and themselves and it’s so nice um it’s one of those things where you when you do something and then you see it come together and you kind of stand back. And I was watching people pain and drinking their coffee and just laughing. And it’s exactly what you want. Speaker 2 Because sometimes you come to, you know, you visit someone that has Alzheimer’s had mentioned, especially this is for people who are early stages or mid stages. And especially in that mid stage where the person is there. But like we were talking about the lasso, sometimes they’re not there. Speaker 2 This is just a really nice way to just build, like she said, build those front load, those memories. And it’s free and it’s fun. We provide all the entertainment. Speaker 2 All you got to do is just show up and just be ready to have fun. Speaker 1 You really are. I have to commend the Heights really at the forefront of this. Listen, anybody can just, you know, you can open up a senior living and say, okay. Speaker 1 But you’ve got ongoing programs, you know, and you’re always looking to, you know, one up and better yourselves. Really. You really, the Heights, I tip my hat to you. Speaker 1 You’re raising the bar. Really. And you know what? Speaker 1 I’m glad you brought up last week’s show because, I mean, Lisa Marshall, she did a phenomenal job with her book and how she related a lot of personal experiences. We have a lot of positive feedback from that show that it kind of segues perfectly into, you know, this morning show. We all we have yet another author who really draws upon her own experience with this. Speaker 1 Perhaps you can do the introduction since you know her. Speaker 2 Yes. Yes. I actually met Beth Robbins. Speaker 2 I met her when I was working for the hospice company. And obviously with hospice, we deal with a lot of grief. And this book is amazing. Speaker 2 It’s amazing the way she wrote this and kind of, like you said, took that experience and then something amazing came out of it. So I want to introduce Mrs. Beth Robbins. She’s an author of a book called A Grief Sublime. Speaker 2 And she also is the owner of a publishing company, Keats & Company. And Beth, good morning and welcome. Speaker 3 Good morning. Thank you for having me. Speaker 1 It’s a pleasure, Beth. I’ve heard a lot about you, but I like to hear from your own words. Tell us maybe a little bit about you, your life, what you do for work, and, of course, about your company. Speaker 3 Yeah. Well, I’m a high school English and drama teacher at the Berkshire Waldorf School in Stockbridge, Massachusetts. And I’ve been a teacher there for almost 20 years at this point. Speaker 3 And I most recently have been working, I was working toward two advanced degrees through Bredlow School of English at Middlebury College. And that’s relevant to the book that I ended up writing and the book that I’m working on currently. I live in the Berkshires. Speaker 3 It’s where my husband, Steve, and I moved about, oh my gosh, getting old. Wow. A long time ago. Speaker 3 I can’t even. Speaker 1 Berkshires are nice. Speaker 3 They’re beautiful. We moved up here from New York City. I was going to say the city, which is always such a little arrogant. Speaker 3 Anyway, we moved up in the 80s, and this is where we raised our three children here. And I started this publishing company at the same time that I wrote this book. And I had a vision of creating a publishing company that would publish works that don’t quite fit into any separate category. Speaker 3 And I was looking to foster conversation and communication and create events. And all of this happened right before the pandemic shut everything down. So the momentum was halted back in 2020 because the book was published in 2019. Speaker 3 And I had all kinds of events going on and I was creating a publishing company. I had a board of directors and it all kind of came to a referring halt temporarily. Speaker 1 So before I get into your book, I’m going to do that in a moment. In fact, I got a whole host of questions for you. Maybe you can share a little bit about, if you don’t mind. I know it’s a touchy subject, but some of the unexpected tragedies that happened in your life leading up to this. Speaker 3 You mean about Steve? Speaker 1 Yes. Dying? Yes. Speaker 1 Yeah. Sorry. No, no, no. That’s okay. Speaker 1 The impetus, if you will. Go ahead. I’m sorry. Speaker 3 No, that’s okay. Yeah, well, Steve, in September of 2015, my husband of almost 30 years, was killed in a car accident coming home from a business meeting. And I was home alone at the time. Speaker 3 Our youngest was still in high school at the time, but he was at an orientation up at a nearby camp. And so I was home alone, and Steve just never made it home. So I guess I would say that was a tragedy. Speaker 1 Yeah, that’s one heck of a tragedy. I mean, obviously you’re waiting for him. You’re notified at some point, right? Speaker 3 Well, yeah, I mean, this was the thing. This is what’s so, and I’m sure others have had this experience. You don’t, if you’re, he was in an accident, it was around 7 o’clock in the evening, but I didn’t have any knowledge of what had happened until the police arrived at my house at about 10 or 10.30 that evening. Speaker 3 So, and I was unable to reach Steve. I kept texting him and trying to call him because it was very atypical of him not to be in communication. And I was getting incredibly worried. Speaker 3 And I didn’t know what to do. I just didn’t know what to do. It never occurred to me that anything happened. Speaker 3 On the one hand, I didn’t think of calling the police or anything. So I just was very, very worried for hours. Speaker 1 All right. That leads to the book. Tell me why you wrote the book and what it was like to write it. Speaker 3 Mm-hmm. Well, there’s a few different pieces to this, so you can help keep me on track if I go a little bit gray. But a friend of mine, after Steve died, I had always wanted to be a writer. Speaker 3 I love literature. It’s my passion, poetry specifically. And a friend of mine said, keep a journal of this experience. Speaker 3 She said, whatever you need to write down, just do it. And it was the best advice that I had received. So I started, I was journaling every day, multiple times throughout the course of the day. Speaker 3 And in this journal, which is, you can imagine, hundreds and hundreds of pages, I wrote everything. I wrote Missing Him. I created a, I wrote it as if I were writing it to Steve. Speaker 3 So in a sense, I was having a conversation with him. I kept track of the dreams that I was having about Steve and that our three children were having, which they told me about. And so I just kept this journal going. Speaker 3 And then the summer after he died, I went to Oxford to study. It was my final summer getting my M.A. through Bread Loaf. Speaker 3 And the summer I was in Oxford. And that summer, I was taking a course in 19th century literature, which is my particular area of interest. And I was having experiences with the poetry and the literature that was kind of blowing me away. Speaker 3 It was so powerful. It was a visceral experience reading poetry, like from Keats or from Walt Whitman. And I was clearly in shock, although what I’ve realized is that when you’re in shock, you don’t know you’re in shock. Speaker 3 So I thought I realized, and I’ve confirmed this with this professor since then, I went up to her and I said, you know, my husband just died nine months ago, and I wonder if I could write a creative piece of writing rather than a scholarly research paper for this course. And I realize now that she probably would have said yes to just about anything that I needed at that point. But I was able to create a conversation in my writing that not only was about these poets that moved me so powerfully and that were helping me negotiate these months after Steve’s death, but I was able, she kept pushing me to tell my own story. Speaker 3 And so that was the summer I had a real breakthrough with my writing. And I discovered my voice as a writer. And I discovered that what I wrote seemed to have a power to it because I had been very harsh in judging my own writing. Speaker 3 And after that summer, I realized I had to keep on writing because it made me… First of all, there was a healing aspect to it. And I felt there was a healing going on because I felt like I was dialoguing in a way with Steve. Speaker 3 And I was also crafting something that in some way was honoring him. I wanted to write something that would give people a sense for who he was because it just seemed so outrageous that he just wasn’t here anymore. And I wanted everyone to know him. Speaker 3 So I began to write the book. Speaker 1 I find this fascinating that you were having, like, were you having dreams every night? And were these dreams, did you, was Steve, do you feel, I just, what’s interesting is just the other night, a couple of nights ago, I was watching a series of videos that are very similar in what you are articulating right now were were these dreams of steve communicating with you or are these dreams of that you were having about your past and some of the things that you did together or maybe the dreams that you’ve yet to have and were cut short sadly you know through um his passing or or or like i want to go back to that first one though yeah was he communicating with you like I’m okay or I’m in a better place or whatever, anything like that. Speaker 3 Yeah. It never, he never, I never heard I’m in a better place. I mean, I, I appreciate what you’re asking, but it, but, um, and we all, and I would say, and my children had given me permission to share, um, their dreams, um, which I did in the book. Speaker 3 Um, for me, they weren’t, they were, um, more, um, well, It’s easier for me to say it this way. So my two sons took over their father’s business. He was known as the Sprout Man. Speaker 3 He was a bit of a character. He wasn’t a bit of a character. He was a character. Speaker 3 It was a creative soul. And he had invented these ways of sprouting. And he used to have workshops in his New York City apartment back in the day. Speaker 3 Yeah, the Sprout Man. Like Superman, but Sprout Man. And both Noah and Ari decided they wanted to take over his business. Speaker 3 He sold seeds, and Steve’s written about, I think he wrote 12 books. And so they took over his business. But they, so their dreams, and this was what was wild about it, these were visits with Steve where he was telling them specific things. Speaker 3 And this is what I just couldn’t get over. For example, Noah woke up one morning and he said, oh, I know who to call. Daddy just told me who to call for the best sprout supply, the seed supplier. Speaker 3 Or Ari was told what to do with a certain bill. Like very practical. Yeah, no. So they were having those dreams, which was wild. Speaker 3 Our daughter, Gabrielle, who’s an artist, was having her own kinds of dreams, which spoke to her. and my dreams were more about, I knew they were him and it was really they were reassuring dreams like they were healing dreams I was seeing colors and geometric shapes and I mean other worldly kind of figures that I had never seen before and it was, these were I felt I was being gifted with these dreams I did have some dreams where I was with him, and they were reassuring dreams as well. And some of them, one of them I remember was about us in a car driving on the road. Speaker 3 Yeah, there were, so that’s kind of what it was. I’m going to have you read from the book in just one moment. Speaker 1 Folks, you, no, because I’m, if you don’t mind, in just one moment. Folks, you are listening to your next chapter, a production of The Heights at Avery Heights, along with Siobhan Mattingly. I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Our guest this morning is the author of a book entitled A Grief Sublime, Beth Robbins. But before I have you read maybe one of your favorite passages from your book, Ron, in listening to this, and I know you worked at hospice for a time, and if you don’t mind, I’m going to have you draw a little bit about from that past and your experience there. Is this typical? Speaker 1 I just I’m asking because strictly by coincidence, just a few nights ago, I was watching a few videos from people who not only people who lost someone near and dear to them. And it had to do with dreams in the middle of the night. They go to bed, you know, and they had this very vivid dream. Speaker 1 Not that they can visually see their face, but their presence or their being, so to speak. Speaker 2 Yeah. Is that typical for? There’s so much stuff with hospice that working there for five years that just kind of fascinated me, the things that happen. Speaker 2 You know, I kind of more relate to like when people don’t pass, like when people say, oh, they have two weeks or they have two days and it seems like they’re going to pass and they don’t and they rebound. and I think that a lot of times there was that person that they needed to see. Or one lady, there was a CD she wanted to hear. Speaker 2 They kept trying to find it. I can’t remember what it was. I think it was a Christmas song. Speaker 2 And they kept trying to find it, and finally someone found it, played it for her, and literally she passed. I know my own experience with my mom. I mean, I didn’t have a great relationship with my mom, And I remember being in the car and driving and feeling like, OK, just go see your mom. Speaker 2 And I wasn’t going to. She was passing. She had hospice. Speaker 2 I made sure she was taken care of, but I didn’t want to see her. And then it was just like, just go check on her. And this was like at night after work. Speaker 2 I was coming back from the Berkshires. And I figured I’d pop in, check in with the nurses, make sure she’s OK and leave. Well, I get to the desk and the nurse is like, you know, why don’t you go see her? Speaker 2 And, you know, I’m like that guilt. And I’m like, OK. So I figured I’d pop in, hang out for a couple minutes and come back out. Speaker 2 Well, I ended up sitting there for two hours. I went from crying to, you know, just loving her to crying again to yelling at her. There was all this stuff that came out. Speaker 2 And I left there completely exhausted. And I had left my cell phone in the car. Because, again, I only planned to run in. Speaker 2 I said to the nurse, excuse me, I said, let me go get the cell phone. I go out to the car to get the cell phone. I come back. Speaker 2 Now, literally, this is like maybe five minutes. And she passed. Speaker 1 Oh, my goodness. Speaker 2 And I’m standing at the desk in disbelief. I’m like, no, no, I was just in there. I was just there. Speaker 2 And, you know, what they said to me is that they probably, she didn’t want to pass while I was there. She waited for you. But those are the kind of, you know, these are just the kind of things that happen. Speaker 2 And obviously, you know, after people pass as well, there’s those times where, you know, either through dreams or just from someone saying something to you, there’s always this, you know, you hear so many stories of people just having that connection. Speaker 1 Beth, if you could maybe quickly, I don’t know, maybe if you could read a part of your book, maybe a portion that maybe that you love the most. How’s that? Speaker 3 Oh, boy. Siobhan, you’ve read. I’m going to throw it on Siobhan for a minute. Is there a part that you would like me to read? I mean, the opening is, you know, the opening where I talk about the accident, but then there’s other parts there. Speaker 2 Wow. There’s like so much, but I think, yeah, I think that, um, there’s like so many. Yeah, do the opening. Speaker 2 How about chapter, oh, okay. Yeah. Go ahead. Speaker 2 What were you going to say? Go ahead. Yeah. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 3 Okay. All right. Preamble. Speaker 3 Translation derived from Middle English, meaning to carry over. I translate my life with Steve and my life without Steve. I carry it over. Speaker 3 I carry it across before. Shadow time, a borderlands moment, a pause. Dusk, early September, a muggy night. Speaker 3 It is still light out, silvery-hued light. Off somehow, but a storm has been predicted, and it certainly feels like one is coming. I curl up on the couch with a glass of white wine and set it on the coffee table. Speaker 3 I light a candle. Steve will be home soon, but for now I am alone. It’s so warm. Speaker 3 The ceiling fan circles slowly, silently. The golden orb of the porch light shimmers through the screen door. The air is heavy. Speaker 3 Things seem muffled. The candle flickers, but there is no wind. Everything feels hushed. Speaker 1 Wow. Chapter one. Oh. No, no, no, no. I’m going to keep going. Speaker 3 Oh, okay. Just chapter one. Fracture. Speaker 3 Medusa. Police lights in my driveway. Flashing red lights I’m in my pajamas It is ten at night The glass of white wine on the coffee table is untouched Steve is hours late The lights flash red I think, don’t answer the door I hear a car door slam Then another Two men are on my porch They’re under the light from the porch They’re outside my screen door Under the golden light from the porch The red lights flash from their car And they see me I turned to stone. Speaker 2 It’s such an amazing book. You’re there. Speaker 1 Yeah. I mean, you’re with her. She’s taking us on the journey. Speaker 1 You get transformed. With her. I’m running out of time. Speaker 1 Just a couple of quick questions. The layout of the book, I find interesting. What is the thought process behind that? Speaker 3 Well, it seems that the way the book ended up being written was in a fragmented style. Speaker 1 Because I know you love poetry. You said that earlier. It’s very similar to that. Speaker 3 And it seems to have a poetic or a lyrical quality to it. And so I worked with a designer to create a lot of white space around the lines of text and just to really give the story some breathing space and to have big margins because there’s some marginalia, some little comments or poetry in the margins as well. Speaker 2 Well, it’s comforting, too. It is. Even the cover, the whole book is very, it’s almost like, again, you transform us there, and it’s obviously your story and so forth, but it’s still, it’s almost like you can relate. The white space helps you, gives you room for your own story, your own grief process. Speaker 1 I bet that was by design, right? Speaker 3 Absolutely, yeah, yeah. And I was very concerned about having the book have a particular texture to it, so the cover, it’s this, I got French flap. Speaker 1 I’ve got to ask you a question because I’ve only got about two minutes left. Beth, how has your life changed since you’ve written this book? Speaker 3 In two minutes? Okay. It’s changed completely in a certain way because what I’ve, well, first of all, it’s shown me that I write as well as teach, and I am working on a second book right now. There was a movie that was made, directed by Cynthia Wade, called Sproutland, that was an independent fictional narrative of my story, where I played myself. So there were, which is very weird. Speaker 2 Yeah, I’ll bet. Speaker 3 It’s kind of cool. And I always, and I’m a bit of a ham, so I always wanted to be an actress. I just didn’t think I was all that good. But anyway, I’m in that film, and that was kind of cool. and I’m just in a way stepped back into it’s such a cliche but I’ve stepped back into my own power so that I’m sort of doing this little bit of a dance between I’m still grieving I mean I guess I always will be grieving I miss Steve terribly but I’m also very aware of the gifts that have come out of his death which is a bit of a paradox Speaker 1 are you at peace? can grief actually become something good or helpful to a person? I know those are three questions right there. Speaker 3 Well, it has for me, and it has for me. Everyone’s going to have their own experience. I just want to keep on moving. I do appreciate life more. I took Steve for granted for a good number of years. Speaker 1 I mean, I guess in a lot of long marriages that happen. Speaker 3 So I’m trying not to take things for granted and just to pay attention to life. Speaker 1 Are you at peace, though, going forward? Speaker 3 Am I at peace? Yeah, yes. Yes and no. I mean, I’m excited about the possibilities of the things that have happened and what’s coming. So I guess in that way I am. Speaker 1 Well, then I’m excited for you. I’ve got to wrap things up. Okay. Speaker 1 I want to thank our guest this morning, Beth Robbins. She is the author of A Grief Sublime. Where can people purchase this book? Speaker 1 I would imagine Amazon and Barnes & Noble or any place where you normally buy your books. Speaker 3 Yeah, local bookstores. And also, if you just go on agreefsublime.com, you can buy it directly from me. Wonderful. Speaker 3 It’ll take you right there. So there’s that too. But local bookstores, they can get it. Speaker 3 Wonderful. Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to the latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living, with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Avery Heights is a beautiful senior living community. It’s nestled within 43 acres of nature, right in the heart of the junction between West Hartford, Newington, and Hartford. Speaker 1 Those who live there have access to a full continuum of care, including independent and assisted living to memory care and a whole lot more. Please visit AveryHeights.org or by calling 860-953-1201. I’ll repeat that phone number, 860-953-1201, to learn more about their own special brand of community, unlike any other in Connecticut. Speaker 1 For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Thanks so much for listening. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. 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This episode will give you helpful tips to make this time productive and successful. ### Episode Transcript+ Speaker 1 Good Saturday morning to everybody and welcome to your next chapter senior living radio show a production of the Heights at Avery Heights a one-of-a-kind senior living community centrally located near the most entertaining and historical spots in Connecticut. Now it’s never too late to grow and enjoy new realms of the mind and heart. This show will discuss exciting opportunities, important resources for older adults, financial well-being, senior living communities, and emotional health, and a whole lot more. Speaker 1 Along with director of senior living specialists. You know, we’re talking about director. So you’re like many, many hats. Speaker 1 You prefer to be called a senior living specialist. Speaker 2 That I know. Yes. But a director at home. Speaker 1 Ha, ha, ha. Speaker 2 Director of operations. Yes. At home. And human resources, yes. Speaker 1 At home. All right. But you wear many hats because you are director of marketing. Speaker 1 I do the marketing. Okay. You could also be a director of admissions. Speaker 1 Yes. Correct? Definitely. Speaker 1 But the one thing you just, I just found this out a little while ago and it makes a lot of sense because this is how I see you. You really are a senior living specialist. Speaker 2 Yeah. And that’s really the main one I like to see. To me, it’s more inviting. Speaker 2 It’s more comfortable. I was told the other day I have a calming voice on the radio. Wow. Speaker 2 my husband was like what look out delilah exactly right today we’re going to talk about Speaker 1 yes what he left you oh that’s no now you’re giving advice you’re not just i have a song that suits your situation i will survive what a chick song yes we’re talking about like wedding songs where the women a couple of weeks ago uh jimmy jay my producer uh and i were talking about songs that just get played. They’re timeless classics. Yes. They’re just as popular today as they were when they got released in an I Will’s Gloria Gainer. I Will Survive in the late 70s. Speaker 2 Every woman has screamed that in the car. Of course! As she’s driving away from, you know? Yeah. Speaker 1 But if you go to a wedding, all the girls, they all congregate together. All the women are singing it on the top of their lungs. Who plays it at their wedding? Speaker 1 Oh, that’s a big song. At the wedding? I know. I know. When you start Speaker 2 listening to the lyrics, it’s like… That’s like A pre, you know. Speaker 1 I’ll never forget. It’s not a good idea. No, you’re right. Speaker 1 Yeah. You’re right. Why would you want that song? Speaker 1 Why? Because I will survive. Right. Speaker 1 Okay. I used to, I owned a company years ago. We DJed weddings. Speaker 1 Yes. Okay. So there was, this is going back early 90s. Wow. Speaker 1 Okay. Somebody had their Speaker 2 I was in high school. Speaker 1 No, that’s not true. You were not. I know how old you are. Speaker 1 I was at the prom. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 1 Maybe as a guest of someone’s prom date. Maybe. Speaker 2 Maybe. Speaker 1 Their wedding song was by the police. Every Breath You Take. Oh. Speaker 1 Right? You know the song? Oh, that’s like a stalker. Speaker 1 Thank you. That was my point. And I finally, that was their song. Speaker 1 And I said, you know, because I sat down and I’m like, all right, let me know what’s your wedding song. And they’re like, well, Every Breath You Take. And I’m like, oh, okay. Speaker 1 Well, yeah. And she’s like, why? And I go, just out of curiosity, why did you choose as your wedding song? Speaker 1 Because I’m a stalker. That was the first song they ever danced to. Speaker 2 Oh, I get that. Speaker 1 They were somewhere and he asked her to dance and boom, boom, boom. And that’s what started the whole thing. And he said, they looked at my face. And I guess without me saying anything, it was very expressive. Speaker 2 But you shouldn’t have to explain your wedding song. Speaker 1 Well, I asked, though. Speaker 2 But I’m saying you shouldn’t have to say, did you explain it at the wedding? Did you go, this is the song they danced to? Speaker 1 No, no, no. I’ll finish this. They go, what’s wrong, Gary? And I go, oh, no, nothing. Speaker 1 No, what’s wrong? And I said, are you sure you want the answer? Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 I go, that’s why I asked why you chose that song. You said it was the first song you ever danced to. Makes a lot of sense, except that’s not really a love song. Speaker 1 And I go, listen to the lyrics. In fact, let’s take it into the studio right now. Because I had a studio in the office, and I played them the song, and they read the lyrics. Speaker 1 Because they used to sing it to each other, evidently, without paying much attention. And they’re like, this is about stalking somebody. They changed their wedding song. Speaker 2 Wow. Where’d they go with? Speaker 1 Here and now? Luther Randall? That was like the wedding song of like 1990. Speaker 2 Yes. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 2 Mine was Crazy Girl. Speaker 1 Crazy Girl? Speaker 2 Yep. It’s like a country western song and I can’t remember who sings it yet. Are you a big country western fan? Speaker 2 I love country western. My dad was from Kentucky. Really? Speaker 2 I’m a huge country western fan. Speaker 1 Who did Country Girl? I’ll have to look that up. Speaker 2 Yeah. Crazy Girl. Speaker 1 I mean, crazy girl. Speaker 2 Yeah, because my husband used to, he just used to call me crazy, but he said he still loved me, even though I was kind of, yeah. Speaker 1 You had a wild streak in you, didn’t you? Speaker 2 I did. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 2 An anger streak. Yeah, don’t get me mad. And that’s so interesting. Speaker 2 Actually, I’m very calmed down. I’ve become very zen. Speaker 1 You’ve said this in the past, months ago. Yeah. Which I find interesting because, as you just say, juxtapose that against your very soothing voice that you were mentioning a moment ago. Speaker 2 Exactly. Speaker 1 I can’t see you as a very angry person. At all. Speaker 2 Well, the more you forgive, the more grace you give. Speaker 1 You just found the secret. Speaker 2 You get rid of. And I didn’t even realize that until I started doing it. The more you get rid of baggage, the better off you are. Speaker 1 That’s the secret to, I think, a longevity in life. Speaker 2 It is. Speaker 1 Got to let it go. Speaker 2 Because when you’re carrying all that around and you’re just angry. And people see it. Like you said, people can see stuff in your face. Speaker 2 People can see it. It comes out. Oh, Eli Young Band. Speaker 2 That’s what it was. Oh, okay. I don’t even know if they still make songs. Speaker 2 So that’s why. Speaker 1 I’ve heard of the band. I don’t know if they’re still around, but of course I’ve heard of the band. Speaker 2 It’s a funny song. Speaker 1 You know, I’ll be playing it later. I’m on my way home. Speaker 2 Don’t listen too close to the words. Speaker 1 Uh-oh. You’re one of those as well. Speaker 2 Yeah. Our song actually did have to be explained. So now, yeah. Speaker 1 The DJ explained it all? No. Speaker 2 That’s so dull. Speaker 1 You did? Speaker 2 No. No, we just knew. No one even asked me. I’m sure they were sitting there like, what the? Where’s here and now? Speaker 1 What year did you get married? Speaker 2 We’re going to be eight years now. Eight years? Eight years. yeah it’s kind of crazy i was looking uh you know i know because on facebook some pictures just started to pop up because it’s may 14th it’s coming out oh look at actually anniversary of my job may 9th may 14th my wedding yeah so it’s 2016 something like that again the only reason why i know is because it popped up on facebook i have so many things going on in my mind my age the year i was married my kids ages i yeah i listen about the doctor’s office now this is your child used to drive my daughter crazy because she was like you don’t know my birthday you don’t know my year. Speaker 1 Do you find yourself having to write more things Speaker 2 down? Oh, definitely. I have list Speaker 1 upon list. Otherwise, forget it. Speaker 2 I have this list right here, like what we’re going to talk about. Before we get into today’s Speaker 1 show, what’s new over at Avery Heights? We’ve got our open houses. Speaker 2 Our annual open houses. May 6th, we have the first one. We’re having a lunch and a presentation this year. Speaker 2 Actually, our guest for next week’s show, Ben Rayo, is going to be on. He is the founder of Mom’s House. He’s going to be talking about paying for long-term care. Speaker 2 So he’s going to be kind of given a broad brush of it. Great guy. And, of course, you know, he’s passionate about it because something happened with his family. Speaker 2 You find that so often. So he’s a great guy. And then on the 13th, we’re having Amstin Home Transition Solutions. Speaker 2 They’re the gentlemen and ladies who do our, you know, our moving. So they’re going to be talking about downsizing, what you must know before you move. So really good topics for people, you know, things that people always have questions on. Speaker 2 That’s awesome. Yeah. Some people get lunch, they get the presentation, they take a little tour. Speaker 2 You know, there’s always – We’re very hands-off. We’re not going to be like – we’re not locking the doors. It’s not a timeshare deal. Speaker 2 That’s what it feels like, you know. It’s like – Speaker 1 There’s always something going on, though, at April. Speaker 2 You can have a free TV, you know. Come on down. All right, no. It’s going to be very low-key. We just want people to come, have some lunch, relax, learn a little bit, walk around a little bit, and just get to know us. Speaker 1 So you have a busy rest of April, a busy May? Speaker 2 Yeah. Mother’s Day, obviously. Grandparents Day. Speaker 2 We’ve got a lot of stuff coming up. Oh, actually. Yeah. Speaker 2 It’s great. I can’t predict these. Yeah, we’ve got our summer concerts coming up. Speaker 2 Summer concerts on the lawn. Yes. On the lawn. Speaker 2 Are you kidding me? Yeah, we bring in bands. And so it’s packed. Speaker 2 It’s great. Everybody. It’s neat because the cottagers, they just come out and put their chairs out because it’s right there. Speaker 2 And we have people from all over the neighborhood come out as well as from West Hartford, Newington. And it’s packed. It’s pretty cool. Speaker 2 Yeah. June, July, and August. We do three. Speaker 2 Who else? Who does this? Yeah. Speaker 2 It’s nice. It’s really nice. And they’ve been doing it so it’s classic Speaker 1 alright I’m just I’m sorry I didn’t even I didn’t know you guys did some of that Speaker 2 yes yeah it’s a great place to work I’m so excited coming up on a year I wish I were like Roseanne who we had on 27 years but I get it like when you ask the question you know why did you stay there so long I know why I mean I literally when I got my benefits when they signed me up for them I literally skipped away I was just Speaker 1 they just take care of their employees so well definitely you are lucky to be working at a place that you love to work and not only that but you know you’re contributing yeah and you feel that Speaker 2 too and i think that’s important um with a job you have to feel like you’re a part of it you know like you’re like you said like you’re contributing like you’re making a difference uh that you’re not and and you know bill our director treats everyone like they’re uh important and a part and they are Every piece is what is the whole tapestry thing. Every piece, you take that one string away and it’s raveling. I know. I’m so wise. I’m like a sage. Speaker 1 You are. You are like a sage. Well, a big part of your job, though, is also giving tours. Speaker 2 Yes. How many tours do you actually give a week? Oh, my gosh. Speaker 2 I was trying to actually figure that out. And I think I give probably on a busy week probably at least two or three a day. And sometimes that includes Saturday as well. Speaker 2 So that could be at least, what is that, like 21? On a slower week, we’re probably talking about 10 or 12. But I do a lot of tours. Speaker 2 And a lot of stuff is people are ready to go now for the future. Some of it is just people who are looking for the next couple of months. So it just depends. Speaker 2 So it’s important to just, people just come in and they always worry, oh, I’m just looking. And I’m like, that’s all right because you want to start early. You want to look early. Speaker 1 All right. So when you’re giving a tour, all right, how do I ask this? When you’re giving the tour, are there mistakes that people can actually make while they’re being guided? Speaker 2 Yeah, absolutely. And I think that the reason why this to me is an important topic is no one teaches this. No one teaches this to you. Speaker 2 And I don’t know how many people come in and they’re like, I don’t even know what I’m doing. I don’t even know what I’m doing. And of course you don’t, right? Speaker 2 We learn from our friend who just had a baby, right? We learn how to take care of a baby. We learn from our friend who just bought a car. Speaker 2 Hey, I just bought a car. You buy it in September. But no one talks about senior living. Speaker 2 Who wants to really talk about that when you really think about it? Unless it’s like an exciting move because I want to for socialization. But a lot of times it can be for assisted living and it’s a difficult move. Speaker 2 So some of the biggest things is not touring enough locations. And I hate to say that out loud, but it is true. You should tour. Speaker 2 When people come in to me, sometimes I’m the first, sometimes I’m the last. But sometimes when I’m the first, they’re like, oh, they apologize. Oh, we’re going to go to two other locations. Speaker 2 I’m like, great. You know, you have to. You have to look at more than one location. Speaker 2 It’s like anything, the power of three. Right. When you’re going for a contractor, you’re not going to go with your first contractor. Speaker 2 If you’re having an operation, you’re going to get a second opinion and a third and a third. It’s important. You know, but having said that, you don’t want to tour like 12, which is why three is like a good number. Speaker 2 It’s the perfect number. I mean, if you’re not finding what you want in that three, of course, keep going. But when you’re getting into 10 and 15, now you’re just kind of like overloading your mind and it’s too much. Speaker 2 So usually like three is usually a really good number. One of the biggest things is with that, making an impulsive decision. So when you’re in there taking the tour, you fall in love with the person giving the tour, which people often do with me. Speaker 1 But not a good idea. Speaker 2 It’s a good idea to kind of not make that emotional, impulsive decision. It’s a good idea to wait, come back with a friend, have lunch, talk to some residents. That’s always the way to go. Speaker 2 And don’t go on financial alone. I can’t say this enough because, you know, if you’re getting, oh, we’ll give it to you for $1.50, you know, think about it. Think about when you’ve bought, you know, I always, you know, buy the top of the line kind of, I love hamburgers. Speaker 2 So I always buy the Wahlburger. I do too. Love their hamburger meat. Speaker 2 So do I. A little bit more, a little bit more. It’s probably like $8 for the regular pound. You’re probably paying $10. Speaker 2 But think about it. It’s like it’s that little bit. Before burger. Speaker 2 Yes, that little bit of difference. It’s delicious, you know, and it’s the same thing with the senior living community. If you’re getting it for $1.50, think in your mind why. Speaker 2 And think about, always ask about the rate increase. What is the rate increase? You know, people don’t, they get afraid to ask that. Speaker 2 But it’s important to ask that because if you’re coming in on this really, really low rate, yay. You know what, a year from now, you’re probably talking about a 14, 18, I’ve heard crazy, huge percentages that people have. And so you have to be cautious of that because you’re budgeting. Speaker 2 And now you’ve got this 14% increase. you were thinking, you know, maybe two, maybe 4%. You weren’t thinking 14% and it’s a lot. Speaker 1 There is a statement that I used to give to when I was in business. It’s expensive to be cheap. Speaker 2 Yes, it is. It’s so true because I used to buy a good one is I used to buy my son’s jeans at a department store and always ripping the knees. He’s a boy. Speaker 2 Ripping, ripping, ripping. Well, yeah, I was, oh, I’m spending $10. Great. Speaker 2 So then I started going to another store, which was Old Navy, and it was better. It was just better. It was a little bit more. Speaker 2 Actually, I found it at the outlet. It used to be in Vernon, which was phenomenal. But the jeans lasted longer. Speaker 2 And so I was buying probably twice as many pairs of jeans, probably spending twice as much money where I could just buy him one pair until he grew. Speaker 1 Old Navy. Speaker 2 Love Old Navy. Speaker 1 Got them on right now. Speaker 2 Yeah. They really have good quality. Speaker 1 You know what I also find out, and you can really apply this to anything in life. It’s not just how much something is, is what’s the value, you know, because you talk to somebody who’s got years of experience that they can draw upon. Not just, well, I graduated from this school. Speaker 1 That’s great. But I like the hands on somebody who’s you can’t throw them a ball that, you know, a curveball that they haven’t seen before. Right. Speaker 1 You know, and so they can draw upon that. There’s something to be said for paying a little bit more, but when you look at the big picture, you’re getting so much more out of it. Speaker 2 For your car, clothes, all this stuff applies with that. I mean, you don’t want to spend thousands of dollars maybe for a watch, maybe as a gift or something like that, but you can find affordable and, like you said, good value, good quality. It’s important as you get older to look for that. Speaker 2 Another one is the adult children or the caregiver making it all about themselves. What does that mean? That means either they’re making the tour about themselves. Speaker 2 Oh, I got to go. Or we don’t need to see that. Or, you know, they’re rushing the person. Speaker 2 And this is an older adult. Their mind is not. We were just talking about, you know, writing things down because our minds are getting older. Speaker 2 It’s like they, you know, they want to take their time. And if they want to look down that hall, let them do it. This is their decision, too. Speaker 2 Don’t make it all about you. And don’t disrespect if it’s your parent or whatever. Yeah, you may know that they have some kind of health issue. Speaker 2 But don’t talk over them. Talk with them. You know, is it okay if I bring this up? Speaker 2 Is it okay if I mention this? You know, don’t treat them like a child. You know, don’t hush them down. Speaker 2 I think that a lot of times adult children like to, which is, and caregivers like to take control of the situation, which is nice because you’re caring for your older adult. But a lot of times you can hinder the process. And, you know, ultimately that person, oh, I don’t want to move. Speaker 2 Well, of course you don’t want to move. Because who wants to move if, you know, they’re going to be kind of like feeling that ickiness inside and they don’t have that good feeling on the tour. And that definitely can breed that. Speaker 1 Do you ever allow, and this might be so outside the box and innovative, but do you ever allow somebody a sample like, why don’t you come and spend a weekend here? Speaker 2 Yeah, we don’t do that necessarily because there’s a lot of like legal stuff. We have to have, the person has to have an assessment and those types of things to stay kind of, unless we do a hospitality apartment, especially if they’re assisted. But we do a day in the life. Speaker 2 We just did one actually for someone for memory care. We can do that for someone in assisted living so they can spend, you know, the day there, have breakfast, have lunch, you know, have dinner and then head out so we can observe them as well and see how they do in the environment, but also so they can be in the environment, too. That is important. Speaker 2 Yeah. I always encourage and they should always ask, can I meet with some residents? There’s always a welcoming committee at a senior living community. Speaker 2 Definitely meet with some residents. I give them a chance to talk to the resident. If they start talking to a resident, I walk away. Speaker 2 I give them too far away, but I walk away so they can talk to them freely. So I’m not like on top of them and the residents looking at me like, I didn’t say it. I didn’t say it. Speaker 1 I know you come from a background from hospice. Have you ever worked at another senior living facility? Yes. Okay. So without naming it, what does Avery Heights do better than that other facility? Speaker 2 That’s a great, well, I think it’s a lot of, because we’re a nonprofit. So are we census driven? Sure. Speaker 2 But it’s not like our main thing is our mission and our vision and our goals, which is to take care of old adults, find them proper housing, healthy, proper, vital housing. So it’s not always about the numbers. And I think what they do well is, I mean, Roseanne, who we had on, our resident service coordinator, the social worker, that is such a huge element. Speaker 2 To have someone that can hold their hand, that can be an advocate, then walk them through the community. You know, a door that they can knock on and say, hey, can I have a minute? And that person has a minute to talk. Speaker 2 I think that’s super important. I think the difference is our management, too. I think a lot of times people put, this might get me in trouble, people in management positions that just because of their years they’ve been with the company, just because they know how to deal with the widgets. Speaker 2 Well, that’s not management. Management needs to have skills. And I think Bill is an exceptional – actually, matter of fact, all the management truly at Avery Heights is exceptional. Speaker 2 I just – just the way – and it comes from our president, Patrick, who I think we had on last year on Veterans Day. I think it comes from him. I mean he does such a great job of just setting that tone and our board does a great job because we’re a nonprofit of setting that tone as well. Speaker 2 And I think they don’t put people in management’s positions just because they need to fill it. Or, again, just because they know how to they put people in the position that are caring, respectful and have that full rounded, you know, ability to to work with people on a great, respectful way. And I just think that’s so important. Speaker 2 I think a lot of times companies just don’t do that. And I think it’s damaging. Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to your next chapter, Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly, Senior Heights. senior living specialist, along with Siobhan, I’m Gary Byron. I didn’t want to interrupt you. I just wanted to get that in really quickly. Speaker 2 Yeah, definitely. Speaker 1 Go ahead. I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt you. Speaker 2 No, no, that was it. That was it. That was just kind of my little soapbox. Speaker 2 It’s a big thing for me. I just have seen so much people just get hurt and so much turnover at places too. And it’s really sad because, and it’s all because you got that. Speaker 2 It is, it’s the management. Speaker 1 How long does it take to go on a tour? Is this like a two-hour tour? Speaker 2 It depends. I’ve had as little as a half hour. I’ve had as most like three hours, four hours. Speaker 2 It really depends. I don’t really rush people, especially if I have the time. Sometimes if I’m back to back to back, I don’t have as much time, but then I have them come back, whether for lunch or for a meal or for an activity or something like that. Speaker 2 But, yeah. Speaker 1 Is there a favorite, like something that always gets a positive response whenever you’re on the tour with somebody? Speaker 2 Oh, God, the pool. I love the pool. Yeah, people love the pool. Speaker 2 They love the weight room. I mean, Mark is a big hit. He’s our personal trainer and he’s amazing. Speaker 2 He’s been there for like almost 30 years. And he’s always like, you know, so many people in the gym. They’re, you know, they’re amazed that like these older people working out and, you know, some with walkers, some with, you know, oxygen tape. Speaker 2 They’re just amazed at the kind of people that are working out and they’re just, you know, they’re enjoying themselves. So I think that always is a big hit. The library. Speaker 2 Actually, just a ton of them. We have a patio now. Look at you. Speaker 2 You’re proud of it all. The movie theater. Yeah. Speaker 2 The terraces. People love the fact that every, the washer dryer, people love that. People love that every apartment has a washer dryer, the terrace, people love it. Speaker 2 Yeah. Speaker 1 What about offering any tips for people touring a senior living community? What advice would you give them? Speaker 2 I always say schedule in advance. People like to do the walk-in tour. And I get why they like to do it. Speaker 2 They think they’re going to catch us off guard. Like it’s Fantasy Island. Remember Fantasy Island? Speaker 2 The plane, the plane, of course. They’re coming. Tattoo and Mr. Rourke. Speaker 2 Get ready. Yes. And I get it. Speaker 2 You want to catch us off guard. But at the same time, it limits. We’re not prepared for you. Speaker 2 You know what I mean? And so it’s better to kind of schedule your tour. Do maybe the walk-in later, like the unscheduled tour later. Speaker 2 Do the surprise. That’s fine. But I think for your first tour, you want to have it scheduled. Speaker 2 Because I think it just helps everybody. I think that’s good. Prepare your questions. Speaker 2 AARP has a wonderful list of questions. So have a list of questions. And don’t be ashamed to have. Speaker 2 I had one guy who had like three, four pages of questions. It was awesome, though. It was great for me because I was kind of fairly new. Speaker 2 So it was great. I was like, I don’t know the answer to that. I’m writing these things down. Speaker 2 So he helped with my training. I almost thought someone sent him in. It’s like, Bill, did you send this guy in? Speaker 2 But it was great. Speaker 1 That’s funny. Speaker 2 Yeah, so it was great. First, second, third impression matters. So don’t be afraid to take. Speaker 2 I’ve done up to eight tours for one family. Don’t be afraid to take multiple tours. It’s important. Speaker 2 Yeah, take multiple tours. Don’t just go first tour. Yeah, do a first, second. Speaker 2 I’m going to get so much hate mail from my fellow marketing people. What are you doing? It’s like you’re giving away the secrets. Speaker 2 You know, ask how a person handles the tough stuff. You know, what if my loved one falls? What do you do? Speaker 2 You know, ask the tough questions. Bad things happen. It’s how we handle it. Speaker 2 It’s how we – and, of course, bad things are going to happen. It’s how we handle it. Pay attention. Speaker 2 Be a detective. You know, don’t get so caught up in the, you know, laughing with me. You know what I mean? Speaker 2 You know, I’m silly. You know, pay attention. Look on the walls. Speaker 2 Look everywhere. You know, pay attention to stuff and ask questions. Why is that there? Speaker 2 What’s going on there? What’s going on here? Ask questions. Speaker 2 You know, stay for a lunch or a meal. Always have a meal, you know, or come even for an activity. You want to just see a day in life. Speaker 2 You want to see the environment. You want to be in it, you know, not just kind of on the outside of it. It’s a different feel. Speaker 2 Talk to the residents. Always talk to the residents. You know, I set up phone calls. Speaker 2 I’ll set up private visits. A lot of places do cool stuff like that as well, which is great. It asks about the amenities and the extras. Speaker 2 Always ask about, you know, what else is there? You know, there’s always the hair salon and different things like that. But there’s always different other little things. Speaker 2 Always ask. Speaker 1 You think somebody can get more information on somebody like yourself or other employees or from some of the residents themselves? Speaker 2 I think it’s a combination. Speaker 1 Okay. Speaker 2 Yeah. I always, like I said, I always give people time to talk to other people other than me. Like Tim is a big hit, the dining room. Speaker 2 Because a lot of people always have questions about, oh, you know, I don’t like crust on my bread. Okay, let’s go talk to Tim. I’m sure he’ll cut it off for you. Speaker 2 You know, it’s like, you know, so I think that’s more. That’s one of the more easier projects I would imagine. Yes. Speaker 2 I think that’s important. Special diets. I think, you know, talking to Roseanne, I often will have a new resident who’s moving in set up a call with her ahead of time or a meeting ahead of time with her. Speaker 2 so she can get a feel for what their needs might be so she can kind of be prepared. Meeting with Bill I think is important. So definitely meeting with the staff. Speaker 2 I think meeting with a resident is so important, you know, especially, you know, like veterans meeting with veterans or, you know, like if someone, you know, unfortunately just lost their, you know, husband or wife. So, you know, widows meeting with widows kind of thing. Or someone has their husband or their wife has Alzheimer’s or dementia. Speaker 2 So I try to set people up to come to the support group, you know, Even if they decide, you know, not to move forward and say, hey, come to the support group, you know, meet some of our residents and get involved. So I think the more people get involved and come to activities, come to events, by the time you move in, it’s like people are like, hey, what’s going on? Speaker 1 Would you prefer to be, let’s just use the rule of threes here. Would you prefer to be someone’s first tour or their final tour? Speaker 2 That’s such a good question. I like to be the final tour. okay yeah i totally don’t like to be the first tour i like to be the final because a lot i i love when people say oh my gosh we should have come here i’m always like a lot of times because you know avery heights is the best i always say the best hidden secret it’s a diamond that no one knows about and i love when people i’m making the calls you know you get a lot of referrals they go on multiple places and i said you know just come see us and i love when they do and they’re like oh my gosh and then they totally change their mind and end up moving in with us it’s like it’s worth it to always just go just come see us you know i mean it’s just one more tour i’m gonna feed you you know i always say i’ll treat you to lunch i mean it’s a meal you don’t have to worry about and you know it’s always good to hear that though i’ve had people from other we have a lot of people that have moved over from other communities just recently for whatever reason yeah and and they’re like oh we should have come here first we should have come here first you know and and so yeah i like to be the last tour or maybe in the middle but really the last tour is the best one because then I can find out everything Speaker 1 that they experienced. You leave them on a high note. Exactly. The first tour is tough because it’s just like Speaker 2 now they’re comparing you to everything else. Speaker 1 Or they don’t know. If you’re the first tour they don’t even know what they don’t know. Speaker 2 It’s like a first boyfriend or girlfriend, right? Speaker 1 Yeah, you can go back and do those. Yeah, now with more experience under your belt and go back and correct things. Yeah, Speaker 2 see? So it’s good to be the last one. Speaker 1 Folks, you have been listening to the Latest edition of your next chapter, Senior Living with Siobhan Mattingly, the Heights Senior Living Specialist. Now, you can come see for yourself at one of the Heights 2023 Open House events. As Siobhan mentioned earlier, May 6th, you’re going to get a tour, lunch, and a presentation. Speaker 1 And what? Ben Rayo’s mom’s house. She’s paying for long-term care. Speaker 2 Yep, yep, yep. Speaker 1 May 13th, a tour, lunch, a presentation, which is downsizing what you must know before you move. And that’s with Amstead Home Transition Solutions. They were on the show as well. Speaker 1 Yes, they were. You did a great job, Andrew. Yeah. Speaker 1 Folks, if you’d like more information or how to register, please visit AveryHeights.org or just call Siobhan. Siobhan, you’ll talk to anybody. You’re so down home and friendly. Speaker 1 And calming. That’s right. The soothing tones. Speaker 1 The dulcet tones. I’ve got to look out in the mornings. You can get out to my job here. Speaker 1 860-953-1201. Again, it’s 860-953-1201. For Siobhan Mattingly, I’m Gary Byron. Speaker 1 Thanks so much for listening. Until next weekend, have a good one, everybody. 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Learn more … - [![](https://averyheights.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/living-your-next-chapter-life-on-purpose-jeffrey-schlichter-mp3-image-300x300.jpg)](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") ## [What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community](https://averyheights.org/ah-podcast/what-to-do-if-your-loved-one-is-reluctant-to-move-into-a-senior-living-community/ "What to do If your loved one is reluctant to move into a senior living community") August 8, 2023 This episode answers the hardest questions adult children and care givers have to face when they know a senior living community is a good choice.… **Categories:** Senior Living & Transitions **Tags:** Assisted Living, independent living, Moving & Downsizing, Senior Living --- ## Series ### [Rock Steady Boxing](https://averyheights.org/series/rock-steady-boxing/) **Published:** August 20, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [Dance for PD®](https://averyheights.org/series/dance-for-pd/) **Published:** July 7, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [Parkinson's Support Group](https://averyheights.org/series/parkinsons-support-group/) **Published:** July 7, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ### [PD Book Club: A Parkinson Support Group Offering](https://averyheights.org/series/pd-book-club-a-parkinson-support-group-offering/) **Published:** July 6, 2026 **Author:** averyheights1 --- ## Categories ### [Uncategorized](https://averyheights.org/category/uncategorized/) --- ### [Senior Living & Transitions](https://averyheights.org/category/senior-living-transitions/) --- ### [Caregiving, Dementia & Alzheimer's](https://averyheights.org/category/caregiving-dementia-alzheimers/) --- ### [Healthy Aging & Wellness](https://averyheights.org/category/healthy-aging-wellness/) --- ### [Financial & Legal Planning](https://averyheights.org/category/financial-legal-planning/) --- ### [Purpose, Inspiration & Positive Aging](https://averyheights.org/category/purpose-inspiration-positive-aging/) --- ### [Research & Innovation in Aging](https://averyheights.org/category/research-innovation-in-aging/) --- ### [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/category/assisted-living/) --- ### [Skilled Nursing](https://averyheights.org/category/skilled-nursing/) --- ## Tags ### [Assisted Living](https://averyheights.org/tag/assisted-living/) --- ### [Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/tag/senior-living/) --- ### [independent living](https://averyheights.org/tag/independent-living/) --- ### [Veterans Benefits](https://averyheights.org/tag/veteransbenefits/) --- ### [Memory Care](https://averyheights.org/tag/memory-care/) --- ### [Caregiving](https://averyheights.org/tag/caregiving/) --- ### [Medicaid](https://averyheights.org/tag/medicaid/) --- ### [Brain Health](https://averyheights.org/tag/brain-health/) --- ### [Healthy Aging](https://averyheights.org/tag/healthy-aging/) --- ### [Aging Life Care Professionals](https://averyheights.org/tag/aging-life-care-professionals/) --- ### [Wellness](https://averyheights.org/tag/wellness/) --- ### [Dementia](https://averyheights.org/tag/dementia/) --- ### [Alzheimer's](https://averyheights.org/tag/alzheimers/) --- ### [Long-Term Care Insurance](https://averyheights.org/tag/long-term-care-insurance/) --- ### [Parkinson's Disease](https://averyheights.org/tag/parkinsons-disease/) --- ### [Financial Planning](https://averyheights.org/tag/financial-planning/) --- ### [Purpose & Meaning](https://averyheights.org/tag/purpose-meaning/) --- ### [Moving & Downsizing](https://averyheights.org/tag/moving-downsizing/) --- ### [Caregiving Senior Living](https://averyheights.org/tag/caregiving-senior-living/) --- ### [Veteran Benefits](https://averyheights.org/tag/veteran-benefits/) --- ### [Skilled Nursing](https://averyheights.org/tag/skilled-nursing/) --- ### [CCRC](https://averyheights.org/tag/ccrc/) --- ### [Retirement Communities](https://averyheights.org/tag/retirement-communities/) --- ## Event Categories ### [Support Groups](https://averyheights.org/events/category/support-groups/) ---